


Letting Go

by storywriter55



Series: Milestones [27]
Category: White Collar
Genre: Aging, Family Drama, Family Member Death, Father-Son Relationship, Gen, Jealousy, Suicide Attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-09 10:21:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 77
Words: 367,788
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27349564
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/storywriter55/pseuds/storywriter55
Summary: Circumstances compel the Caffrey family to let go of the way things are — some for better, some for worse.Part of the 'Milestones' series (23.9 years)
Relationships: Neal Caffrey/Sara Ellis
Series: Milestones [27]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/80614
Kudos: 3





	1. Chapter 1

The sudden, piercing sound disrupted the quiet house, rousing its occupants from their deep slumber.

Neal disentangled himself from his wife’s warm body, feeling the cool sheet against his skin as he turned in bed, intent on silencing the persistently offensive noise. His eyes were drawn to the glowing bedside clock and he grumbled; who the hell would be calling at 2:30 in the morning? 

‘Hello?’ he mumbled into the phone as Sara stirred next to him.

‘What?’ he said, sitting up and getting his bearings. He felt his heart thumping madly in his chest, his brain still foggy as his body reluctantly went from a blissful state of sleep to harsh, brutal wakefulness. 

‘Give me the address’ he groused as the light by the bed came on and he grabbed for a pen.

Sara squinted in the unwelcome brightness, suddenly wide awake; this couldn’t be good news and her first thought was of her mother-in-law whose health had been on the decline as of late. 

‘I’ll be right there’ she heard Neal say, swearing under his breath.

She felt the chilly night air brush against her skin as he threw the blankets off and climbed out of bed, rummaging around the bedroom for something to wear. She watched, her vision still blurry, as he poked around the laundry hamper, coming up with a pair of sweatpants and a sweatshirt and slipping them on as he grumbled. 

‘Jesus Christ!’ he howled as his toe collided with the unyielding metal bed frame. He let out a couple more colourful expletives as he hopped around the bedroom on one foot, rubbing his injured toe as he went. 

‘I swear I’m going to kill her’ she heard him mumble. 

The fog finally lifted and Sara slowly came to the realization that she wasn't dreaming after all.

‘What the hell’s going on?’ she asked, voice still rough with sleep.

‘What do you think is going on?’ he grumbled, taking his mounting anger out on his poor, unsuspecting wife. ‘Your foster daughter is at it again.’ 

Sara barely had time to react before Neal recovered and hobbled out of their bedroom, walking straight into Liam who was standing there in the hallway outside his room looking bleary-eyed in boxers and a t-shirt, hand scratching listlessly at his crotch. 

‘What’s the matter?’ he asked his dad. 

‘Caitlin!’ Neal grumbled, his eyes full of fury. ‘She’s dead drunk at some party…’

He moved towards the stairs as Liam called out after him. ‘Wait! Dad! I’ll come with you, just give me a minute to throw something on.’

‘Hurry up!’ Neal called back over his shoulder, already halfway down the stairs.

Sara was up, grabbing for her robe on the bedside chair. She was hovering in the hallway right outside the bedroom when Liam reappeared, hair disheveled but fully dressed.

‘Don’t let him kill her’ she urged her son, only half joking as the young man jogged down the stairs to catch up to his old man.

Neal had already thrown on his coat and was scrounging around the usual spots for the car keys when Liam appeared, slipping into a pair of well worn sneakers and grabbing for his jacket.

He heard the familiar jingling of the keys and turned to face his dad, noticing the tightness in his face and the shallow, halting sound of his breathing. 

Neal opened the door and the nasty north wind blew in, sending a shiver down Liam’s back. 

‘Let’s go’ Neal said.

WCWCWC

The frost on the windshield began to melt away against the warmth of the car’s heater on what was undoubtedly one of the coldest nights of the year. There was dead silence except for the rhythmic sound of the wipers as they swayed back and forth hypnotically, snow magically reappearing after each swipe of the blades. Liam knew better than to ask too many questions when his dad was this worked up; a rare occurrence for the usually cool, calm and collected Neal Caffrey. And yet, not completely unprecedented when it came to dealing with the antics of one Caitlin Somersby. 

Christmas had been busy with Liam home from his first semester at university, Emily visiting from Chicago and Hope in and out of the house, to say nothing of the fact that Neal’s mom had spent a few days in hospital right before the holidays. Luckily, the June Ellington School of Art was closed for the holidays and things had been rather slow at the gallery, freeing Neal up to spend some quality time with family and friends while juggling his filial responsibilities and the many social obligations of the season.

Not surprisingly, as Linda’s health had begun to deteriorate, Caitlin had begun to spiral, reverting to her old ways, partying, lying, sneaking around and just plain misbehaving and it appeared that Neal’s patience had just about run out. 

‘What is it this time?’ Liam asked, shivering in the seat next to his dad.

The wipers continued their monotonous cadence, brushing away the falling snow as fast as it fell.

‘Jenna called and said Caitlin passed out at a party at her place’ Neal explained, navigating the quiet snow covered streets.

‘Jenna?’ Liam repeated, recognizing the name. ‘Jenna Moore?’

‘Yeah, why?’

‘She’s bad news, Dad. She’s a real party girl… she was always getting into trouble at school. Word is she deals drugs.’

Neal glanced at his son and exhaled loudly, his steely eyes shining with anger. ‘For crying out loud, what is it with Caitlin lately?’ he asked rhetorically. ‘She was doing so well up until a few months ago.’

‘You mean right around the time Grandma started getting really sick’ the younger Caffrey reminded him.

Neal sighed. ‘I suppose.’

It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out the direct link between the two seemingly unrelated developments. When September had rolled around, Caitlin had remained uncertain about her choice of major and Neal and Sara had agreed to give her a year off before enrolling at university - as long as she agreed to bump up her hours at the Blue Skies Day Care Centre where she’d been employed part time for the past couple of years. 

Liam, on the other hand, had been eager to take the plunge and with the basketball scholarship he'd gotten from Syracuse, he’d been ready to leave the nest and move upstate. But Caitlin seemed to lack direction, unsure about her future and with some expanded hours of work at the day care as well as a few hours at a local coffee shop, Neal and Sara had been satisfied that she was acting responsibly while she pondered her future - a future they had worked hard to ensure would be successful. 

But shortly before Christmas, Linda Bennett had landed in hospital with pneumonia and this unforeseen event had thrown Caitlin into a tailspin, heralding the return of some rather troubling behaviour patterns the Caffreys had dared to hope she’d left behind.

‘It’s coming up here on the right’ Liam said as his dad slowed the car, and gave his son a look of consternation, wondering how he knew where Jenna’s house was located.

‘I picked her up here once before’ Liam explained in response to the unasked question.

The closer they got, the more obvious it became which of the houses on the quiet street was hosting the rollicking party. Three patrol cars, complete with flashing lights, were parked directly in front of the last house on the block from which music blared despite the late hour. Several kids were hanging around outside the front door, smoking, the smell of weed immediately discernible the moment Neal opened the car door and prepared to step out.

An officer stood like a sentinel at the front door, directing traffic as kids came and went, undeterred by the police presence. Liam followed his dad directly into the chaos and as they arrived on the front stoop, the ear splitting music suddenly stopped, followed by moans of disappointment from the partygoers. 

‘Can I help you, sir?’ the uniformed police officer asked Neal as he and Liam stood there, shivering on the front porch of the house.

‘I believe my daughter is in there’ Neal said, none too proudly.

‘We’re making some arrests’ the officer informed them as Neal glanced over at Liam with a look of worry.

‘On what charges, officer?’ Neal asked.

‘Some drug related charges, public disturbance… disorderly conduct. What’s your daughter’s name?’

‘Caitlin, Caitlin Somersby’ Neal said, peeking over the man’s shoulder, trying, as best he could, to get a glimpse inside the house.

‘All right, Mr. Somersby’ the officer said, pointing to another uniformed officer who was roaming around inside, ‘Go talk to that officer over there and see if your daughter is one of the kids being charged.’

Neal didn't bother to correct the man as to his name, stepping inside with Liam following close behind. The place looked like a war zone, bottles and cans littering the floor and kids lying around drunk or high, oblivious to the fact the place had just been raided. Neal and Liam sidestepped one of the officers who stood between two disorderly young men, trying to keep them from beating the crap out of each other and they glanced around the open space, noting that Caitlin was nowhere to be seen. 

‘There she is!’ Liam called out, pointing to a redhead nearby. ‘That’s Jenna.’

The two men made their way over to the young woman who stood arguing with another uniformed officer about the bust - from the determined look on her face, this didn't appear to be her first rodeo. She stood, bickering with the police officer who towered over her small frame, her finger wagging in his face in defiance as he attempted to reason with her.

Neal took a deep breath and without hesitation, stepped in between the two of them and without bothering to introduce himself, he insinuated himself into their conversation. 

‘Where’s Caitlin?’ he asked, his voice loud, in order to be heard over the buzz of confusion surrounding them. 

The young woman looked Neal up and down and frowned, seemingly forgetting that she had called him in the first place. She noticed Liam lurking behind him and recognizing him, she smiled flirtatiously, her eyes sparkling, the result of a lot of partying.

‘I remember you’ she said her voice slightly slurred as she touched Liam’s arm. ‘White Plains High, right?’

Liam smiled back and nodded, all in an effort to get the woman to cooperate.

‘That’s right’ he said, as Neal stepped aside to let his son handle things. ‘We’re here to pick up Caitlin Somersby.’

The woman’s expression changed from flirty to disappointed. ‘Is she your girlfriend?’ she asked with a frown.

Liam shrugged and gave her a shy smile, unwilling to give her chapter and verse about how Caitlin Somersby was the furthest thing from his girlfriend, how he didn't swing that way anyway and how she would be the absolute last person on earth he would ever be interested in even if he did like kissing girls instead of strapping young men. Jenna gave him one last loopy smile and pointed listlessly in the direction of a dark corner of the large living room where Caitlin was sprawled out on one of the couches, passed out and drooling unbecomingly.

The sound of blood rushing blared in his ears as Neal got his first glimpse of Caitlin, looking like some common junkie, a far cry from the young woman he knew and loved. He and Liam made their way over to where she lay listlessly, Neal teetering between concern for her wellbeing and just plain, outright fury at finding his foster daughter in such a pitiful state. She wasn't some wayward sixteen-year-old anymore and she knew better than to carry on and let herself get so wasted.

He could feel his heart beating wildly in his chest as he approached her, stepping over a couple of girls who were making out, oblivious to the pandemonium surrounding them; a real shit show all around.

‘Caitlin! Caitlin!’ Neal called out over the confusion as he stood looming over her inert body. He leaned in and gave her a couple of slaps on the cheek in an effort to bring her out of her stupor. ‘Come on, open your eyes.’

He turned to look at Liam. ‘Try to find out if she took any pills or… anything else’ he directed as Liam glanced over towards the hostess who was still looking in his direction; her eyes lingering on Liam’s jeans clad butt. 

He took a few tentative steps in her direction while Neal continued to try to rouse his foster daughter, shaking her vigorously as she moaned in response.

‘Mr C?’ Caitlin slurred as she opened her eyes halfway and saw Neal staring down at her. ‘What are you doing here?’

‘Did you take any drugs?’ he asked her, trying to evaluate if she needed medical attention or just a stern lecture followed by the cold shoulder. 

Sleeping off a night of drinking was one thing but Neal knew all too well that there were countless substances out there for which an overdose would require some sort of immediate intervention; perhaps a good, painful stomach pumping would be just the thing to bring her to her senses. He was furious but there was no way Caitlin was checking out on his watch - or without him first having the chance to properly chew her out.

‘What?’ she muttered, her eyes unfocussed. ‘No… no drugs…’

Neal was helping her get to her feet, holding onto her to keep her from doing an inelegant face plant when Liam reappeared, grabbing Caitlin by the other arm in order to help her stay vertical. Neal spotted her coat and purse on a nearby chair and grabbed them with one hand as he continued to hold his foster daughter with the other. 

‘Well?’ Neal asked.

‘She says Caitlin did a bunch of jello shots and smoked some pot, no other drugs’ Liam declared, although it was difficult to know for sure if the report was credible.

The few police officers lingering nearby had their hands full trying to re-establish order to the chaotic situation and it seemed like a good time to slip out. Neal gave a head nod towards the front door and he and Liam proceeded to drag Caitlin’s dead weight in that direction, intent on getting out of there before the police had time to ask any questions.

‘Let’s get her out of here’ Neal said as they began to drag her out, stepping over some broken furniture and a couple of passed out kids.

The men in blue didn't try to stop them, no doubt relieved to have one less unruly teenager to deal with and Neal and Liam all but carried Caitlin out to the car, dumping her in the back seat as she moaned incoherently.

‘Keep an eye on her’ Neal instructed as Liam stepped into the back seat with her. ‘Make sure she doesn't choke on her own vomit.’

He got behind the wheel as Liam settled in next to Caitlin, the young woman totally oblivious to her surroundings. Except for the occasional moans coming from the back seat, the ride back to their quiet Prospect Park neighbourhood took place in silence. Liam knew better than to try to make small talk when his dad was this angry. Instead, he just kept his eyes on Caitlin and shook his head in disbelief; as far as he was concerned, she was more trouble than she was worth.

Ever since Caitlin Somersby had come into their lives, there’d been nothing but drama and chaos in the otherwise orderly Caffrey home and Liam hated the messed up teen for all the worry and heartache she was causing his parents. The decision to take her in, made over four years earlier, had seemed innocuous enough; she needed a place to stay and the Caffreys were her last hope, her last chance at a better life. Liam and Hope had been willing to go along with the plan but Liam had watched with sadness as Caitlin took advantage of his mom and dad at every turn, stringing them along, playing them for fools while they gave her one opportunity after another to redeem herself.

He had to admit that before he'd gone away to university, he'd begun to notice some improvements in the way she behaved; mostly since Linda Bennett had relocated to the Blue Skies Nursing Home in nearby New Rochelle. For some reason no one had yet been able to explain - or had seen coming - the elderly woman and the wayward teen had instantly bonded and Caitlin had been eager to do right by her surrogate grandmother. When Neal had hit a rough patch following Hope’s horrible car accident, Caitlin had risen to the occasion and Liam had been relieved to see that she’d finally been toeing the line. But since he’d come home for Christmas break, she’d reverted to behaviour he hadn't seen since her early years with the Caffrey family: lying, drinking, sleeping around and not respecting the rules Neal and Sara had set out for her.

His gaze moved to look in the rear view mirror, seeing his dad’s steely blue eyes staring out at the snow covered road ahead. He worried about his old man; he wasn’t getting any younger and all Liam ever wanted was for his dad to be happy… and proud of his kids, all his kids.

WCWCWC

‘That was so much fun’ Hope said as she followed Cam into his apartment and took off her shoes, throwing them in a corner of the living room with a sigh of relief. ‘I hadn't seen those guys is ages.’

Cam threw the car keys onto the small table by the door and turned towards his fiancée, her hair and make-up mussed after a night of dancing and partying. His arms were instantly around her waist as he pulled her in to him and kissed her with fervour. 

He lived for the weekends when Hope usually crashed over at his place. He couldn't wait for her to move out of her parents’ house for good so they could finally settle down and get a place of their own. In the meantime, they were saving up so they could finally get married and move into a nicer place, somewhere in Brooklyn. They had begun to scope out neighbourhoods and had their eye on apartments in the Bay Ridge area; hopefully, they would find a decent place before long and they could finally embark on their new life together.

Cam continued with the enthusiastic groping and Hope’s hands moved up and down her boyfriend’s back, caressing him, her small frame dwarfed by his tall, lanky body. It didn't take long for him to start manoeuvring her towards the bedroom, Hope following willingly and in an attempt to move things along, he lifted her off the ground and proceeded to carry her into the bedroom but not before he hit his shoulder punishingly against the door jamb, cursing loudly in her ear.

‘Cam, it’s two thirty…’ she complained half heartedly. ‘We can make out in the morning before we go over to my folks.’

They hit the bed, the springs creaking in protest under their combined weight and he moved his hands to the zipper of her dress, eager to get her naked.

‘Don’t want to wait’ he mumbled as his lips moved from her mouth to her neck and down towards her breasts. ‘Been looking at you all night in that sexy outfit and now it’s time to get you out of it.’

Hope chuckled, amused by his unbridled enthusiasm. It had taken a long time for her to get her confidence back in the bedroom but the last six months had been great in that department, especially now that all but one of her reconstructive surgeries were behind her.

She heard the sound of the zipper and momentarily felt the cool night air on her back. In a flash, Cameron had positioned her on her back, covering her body with his own, his mouth moving steadily to roam to any and all parts of her body he could get at.

‘You looked beautiful tonight, babe’ he cooed, taking a moment to gaze into her eyes in the moonlit room.

And for a change, she believed him.

WCWCWC

‘Oh, shit!’ Liam called out from the back seat. ‘Pull over, Dad. She’s gonna throw up.’

Neal stared ahead, trying to navigate to a spot where he could safely pull over. Traffic was light at this time of night, especially on the weekend between Christmas and New Years but it took a moment to bring the car to a complete stop, alas, too late. He heard the familiar sound of retching and more colourful language from his son as he tried as best he could to deal with the unfortunate situation.

He’d barely come to a complete stop when Neal heard the car door open and the sound of heaving as Caitlin leaned out the car door and emptied the contents of her stomach by the side of the road. He climbed out of the front seat and moved to help Liam so they could minimize the mess in the back seat - but it was too late and he felt his own stomach lurch at the foul odour.

‘Damn it, Caitlin!’ he shouted as she looked up at him, bleary-eyed.

After a couple more feeble attempts, her body gave out and she seemed to pass out again as Liam struggled with getting her settled once again in the back seat of the car. Neal swore under his breath - a litany this time, the likes of which Liam had seldom been witness to. His father was one of the most patient people he’d ever met; he was kind and soft-spoken, rarely losing his temper and always willing to lend a helping hand - often to his detriment.

Liam knew better than to add fuel to the fire by complaining; the truth was, he just couldn't understand why his parents still hadn't given up on the messed up young woman. He watched his dad climb back into the front seat of the car and despite the cold night air, they both cranked down their windows in the hopes of counteracting the disgusting smells emanating from the back. Luckily, they were almost home and they rode in silence, Caitlin moaning as she floated between drunken stupor and brief bouts of consciousness.

Neal took a few deep breaths, the chill from the outside air hitting his nostrils and providing temporary relief from the stench in the car. He was livid and he reminded himself to keep breathing; losing it wasn't going to help resolve the situation. He was at his wits end and he wondered, not for the first time, if it was time for him and Sara to cut Caitlin loose. 

There was an awful lot happening in their lives these days. Although he seemed to be adjusting well, Liam was still young, just shy of nineteen, and he still needed his parents’ support in order to navigate life as a college freshman in a strange new city. Hope, on the other hand, was still struggling with the vestiges of her horrific accident, facing one last surgery before finally being able to turn the page and look ahead to the future. She was still in speech therapy for heavens sake and Neal had begun to suspect that she and Cameron had secretly settled on a wedding date and were just waiting for the right moment to spring it on him and Sara. When they’d all been together at Christmas, the young couple had announced that they were planning a visit upstate to visit Cam’s parents in a few weeks - a sure sign something was up. 

As if that wasn't enough, Doctor Cooper had read Neal the riot act during his last medical check-up. After a few years of coping with borderline hypertension by using relaxation techniques and sticking to a good healthy diet, Neal’s blood pressure had recently gone through the roof. For the past few weeks, he’d been struggling with finding the right type of medication as side effects such as headaches, dizziness and insomnia continued to plague him. 

To top it off, his mom’s latest health issues had left her hanging on by a thread and for a while there before Christmas, it had been touch and go. Since her move to New York, her health had continued to deteriorate to such an extent that she was now bedridden and Neal was growing increasingly worried, fearing the end might be near for the woman with whom he’d only recently reunited.

Meanwhile, there was Caitlin. Sucking the life out of him. Maybe it was time to finally let go.

The image of a tumbler of fine scotch appeared unbidden. He imagined bringing the glass up to his lips, inhaling its comforting aroma, feeling the cool sensation in his mouth as the amber liquid lingered on his tongue, the refreshing sensation morphing into luxurious warmth as it settled in his stomach, leaving him feeling relaxed and serene.

He blinked, shaking the pesky thought away as they entered their quiet neighbourhood and Neal looked around at the many brightly lit homes welcoming them back home. 

As he got closer, he noticed that the lights were still on at 4788 Meadowbrook Street and that could only mean one thing: Sara was up and waiting.

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

The elaborate Christmas light display in front of the house twinkled against the falling snow as Sara peeked out the front door, checking for cars up and down the street. 

Nothing. 

Neal and Liam had been gone for almost an hour and still no word. She didn't dare call Neal’s phone; if he hadn't called, it was likely because he and Liam had their hands full dealing with Caitlin. She had rarely seen her husband lose his cool the way he had following the unexpected phone call. If anything, Neal was the laid-back one in their coupling, the one who always managed to keep her from coming unglued when things got a little crazy, the reasonable one who didn't argue for the sake of arguing, who always saw the glass as half-full and who had a way of minimizing things before they got too far out of hand. Lately, though, especially as it related to their foster daughter, he’d been having trouble maintaining his composure and she worried about his long term health in light of recent developments.

At least Liam was with him and would look out for his dad. When had that dynamic shifted, she wondered as she meandered into the kitchen and checked her phone one more time. Wasn't it supposed to be the other way around - Neal looking out for Liam? She could kid herself all she wanted but Neal had hit the big six oh on his last birthday and although he looked ten years younger, the doctor had reminded him that issues started to creep up as you hit your sixties, a trend Neal was bound and determined to buck all the way.

Raffie let out a loud snort from his spot on the couch in the family room, oblivious to his mistress and her woes. The house was way too quiet for her taste. Hope was spending the night over at Cam’s, Emily had left to return to Chicago the day before and with Neal, Liam and Caitlin out of the house, every single sound, creak and drip was amplified in the empty house. 

‘Come here, boy!’ she called out with a whistle as she let herself fall on a kitchen chair; company was company - even if it was the four legged variety.

The old dog opened one eye and immediately closed it again, returning to whatever it was dogs dreamed about; didn't she know it was the middle of the night and that he needed his beauty sleep?

‘Fine, don’t come’ she grumbled as she absentmindedly opened the laptop which lay on the table. ‘I don’t care…’

By rote more than anything else, she checked the weather, noting they were calling for another six to eight inches of snow overnight - certainly pretty to watch but crappy to be out driving in. As fast as she’d opened the laptop, she slammed it shut, her mind wandering.

What if they’d taken Caitlin to the hospital? Surely, Neal would have called if that was the case, she reasoned, wringing her hands and picking up the bottle of pills which had been left on the table. She examined the label: Chlorthalidone — hell, she couldn't even pronounce it! Neal had just switched over to this new med a few days earlier, after the previous attempt at blood pressure medication had caused insomnia and, heaven forbid, had deigned to interfere with their lovemaking schedule. Getting it up and in proper working order had never been much of an issue for Neal Caffrey and he was not putting up with any medication that was going to keep him from making love to his wife - whenever the hell he felt like it. Cue the jungle music and the Tarzan yell!

This stuff was different though, the doctor had explained during his last visit, but Neal had been complaining about a nagging headache ever since he’d started taking it - high blood pressure or not, there was certainly plenty in Neal’s life right now to give him headaches, not the least of which was their foster daughter.

The sound of the furnace kicking in startled her and Sara let out a soft gasp as Raffie looked up and sighed. He immediately returned to his snoring and Sara glared at him, wishing she could be as relaxed and carefree as the family pooch - it was a good thing she wasn't in need of any protection. 

Her mind wandered once more as she stood and made her way to the front door then back again. She absentmindedly tightened her robe around her shivering body and adjusted the thermostat; it was freezing out there. 

Watching Caitlin return to her old ways had been unsettling; ever since Hope’s accident almost four years earlier, Caitlin had been on the right track, graduating from high school and holding down two jobs. Sara had always suspected that Linda Bennett had had something to do with Caitlin’s sudden change in disposition back then. Between Hope’s long hospital stay and Neal’s sudden and unexpected descent into alcohol abuse, they had been flailing on all fronts and Linda’s presence had been a stabilizing influence on the unruly teen. As a matter of fact, Linda’s arrival in New York had been the only bright spot in an otherwise bleak period of their lives. After his reconciliation with his mom, Neal had moved heaven and earth to relocate her to a nursing home in New York so they could spend more time together and to everyone’s surprise, a bond had sprouted between their nineteen-year-old foster daughter and Neal’s aging mother. 

It should come as no surprise that, with Linda’s health on the decline, Caitlin would rebel; a predictable reaction to yet another person preparing to exit her chaotic life. The young woman’s mother had been in and out of her life for years, leaving a trail of pain and hurt and except for the stability she’d known since living with the Caffreys, she’d had very little in the way of happiness in her short, sorry life.

Their latest family photograph sat on the kitchen counter and Sara reached for it, smiling at the happy faces staring back at her. When Neal had first suggested taking Caitlin in, Sara had hesitated, unsure how her presence would affect their family dynamic but after discussing it with the kids, they’d all agreed to take the plunge. Their first dealings with Caitlin had been contentious; as a student at the June Ellington School of Art, she had falsely accused Neal of inappropriate behaviour and Sara had been surprised at how quickly he had forgiven the wayward teen for what most would have considered unforgivable accusations.

It hadn't taken a visit to the psychologist’s for Sara to figure out that Neal could see himself in the rebellious teen. He had so many regrets when it came to his own youth and he was bound and determined that Caitlin not follow in his footsteps and land herself in jail - not when she had such a bright future ahead of her. She was talented, smart, funny and so full of life and yet she was angry at the world, feeling the need to rebel against authority - Neal being her main target. Despite his determination to get through to her, Neal often lost patience with the teen and on more than one occasion, he’d threatened to put her out on the street. But he knew deep down it would take a long time to break through and Peter had often weighed in, reminding the ex-con that, sometimes, patience did pay off. 

Sara set down the framed photograph and marched herself back to the front door one more time. She craned her neck to see if there were any headlights coming up the street, sighing in disappointment as darkness stared back at her. Her thoughts returned to her husband, the man she adored and who drove her crazy - two things that, surprisingly, weren't mutually exclusive. Neal hadn’t had a drink in over three years and Sara feared that all this stress might trigger a relapse. He had enough on his plate without having to go out and drag a drunk or drugged out Caitlin home in the middle of the night. 

Maybe she should put on a pot of decaf; it might do Caitlin good and Neal might appreciate a hot drink when they finally made it back. She returned to the kitchen, busying herself with the preparations, taking out coffee and cream and setting out a couple of mugs, just in case. She’d just finished the task when she heard a car door slam in the distance and she ran to the front door with Raffie following close behind.

‘Oh, now you’re awake’ she grumbled as his tail wagged in excitement at welcoming the newcomers.

She could see Neal’s silhouette as he stepped out of the car and moved to open the rear car door followed by Caitlin’s shadow and Liam’s taller form, apparently holding her up. Sara opened the door to let them in, the cold wind blowing snow inside the house and she blinked in response to the giant, wet snowflakes hitting her face. There was muffled grumbling in the distance although, with the sound of the wind, she wasn't sure who was doing the complaining and she stepped out of the door frame to give them the room needed to carry Caitlin inside the house.

Her eyes briefly met her husband’s glare, noticing a myriad of emotions in his gaze: anger, frustration, worry, disappointment, exasperation.

‘Let’s just put her down on the couch’ Neal instructed as he and Liam crossed the threshold and dragged the unresponsive teen towards the back of the house.

The stench of vomit was overpowering and Sara grimaced as she ran in after them, setting down the throw which lay on the back of the couch to keep from getting throw up all over the place.

‘Oh my God, is she all right?’ she asked, her eyes glued to the comatose young woman.

‘Does she look all right?’ Neal replied rhetorically as he and Liam let her drop on top of the cover, her body bouncing up slightly before settling onto the couch. 

Caitlin barely reacted, the front of her clothes covered in disgusting smelling vomit.

‘Awww’ Sara moaned as she ran to get a wet cloth. ‘She threw up on herself.’

‘And all over the back seat of the car’ Liam commented, stepping away and taking stock of himself.

He reeked of vomit and he grimaced as he looked over at his parents. ‘I’m going to go jump in the shower’ he announced, disappearing towards the stairs at the front of the house.

Sara leaned in to wipe down the worst of the mess off the front of Caitlin’s top while she lay on the couch, unresponsive. 

‘Don’t!’ Neal warned, his voice angry. ‘Let her sleep in it. It’ll teach her!’

‘Neal… the whole place is going to reek if we don't clean the worst of it’ Sara replied, ignoring him and continuing with the unpleasant task. 

Neal gave his wife a rare look of scorn and she could practically see the steam blowing out of his ears. 

‘Are you sure we shouldn't take her to the hospital?’ she asked.

‘She’s fine’ he mumbled as he brought his hand to his head, rubbing his temples. ‘It’s just booze.’

‘Another headache?’ she asked, recognizing the all too familiar signs.

Neal’s face was flushed and his eyes bloodshot, anger certainly but also a sure sign that his blood pressure was off the charts. He ignored her and rid himself of his coat and boots, returning from the front hall and staring down at Caitlin with a sad shake of his head.

‘She was doing so well…’ he said, anger morphing to sadness. ‘What are we doing wrong, Sara?’

Sara moved in closer, bringing her arm to rest around his waist. ‘We’re not doing anything wrong, honey. She’s just acting out.’

‘She’s not three-years old’ he remarked, his voice cold and distant. ‘Where’s her goddamn self-restraint?’

‘She might not be three years old but she is impulsive and she’s hurting, Neal.’

Surely, he, of all people, could understand how someone could feel lost and act out in inappropriate ways; after all, he'd done it all through his youth — and much worse.

He gave his wife a dismissive look, anger bubbling right under the surface.

‘You know, she’s not the only one who has to deal with what’s going on’ he said bitterly, turning on his heels and heading up the stairs.

WCWCWC

Neal was sitting on the edge of the bed, head in his hands when Sara entered the room with some pain medication and a glass of water.

‘Here’ she said as she sat down next to him on the bed.

He made the effort to smile at her - a meek effort at best and she brought her hand to rest on his back, rubbing gently, as he took the pills from her hand and threw them back, chasing them with the glass of water.

‘Honey, you can’t let her get to you like this’ she said softly. 

‘Sara, she’s self-destructing right in front of our eyes’ he countered. ‘And I’m not sure I want to be around to watch her go down the tubes.’

She scoffed. ‘Don’t you think that’s a slight exaggeration?’ she attempted with a gentle smile. ‘I’ll admit it’s been a couple of rough weeks but she’s scared, Neal, and she’s reacting in the only way she knows how.’

‘What? You don't think this has been a rough time for me?’ Neal replied, looking into her eyes, pain apparent in his gaze.

‘Of course it has. I know it has but… for some reason, Caitlin isn’t able to cope right now.’

He stood and pulled the sweatshirt over his head, throwing it across the room and missing the open laundry hamper.

‘I need a drink’ Neal said, words that were as scary for him as they were for her.

At least he didn't have to pretend in front of Sara; although the urges were few and far between, there were still moments when his impulse was to grab for a glass of wine or a bottle of scotch, anything to take the edge off. He had no interest in falling into that dark hole anytime soon but hell, it sure would feel good to let go sometimes.

Sara stood behind him, bringing her hands up to his broad shoulders and squeezing.

‘How about I give you a back rub instead’ Sara offered as he turned to face her and fell into her open arms.

She held him against her for a minute, feeling him start to relax. She coaxed him out of the rest of his clothes and within seconds, they were back in bed where they’d been an hour earlier, Neal safe in his wife’s warm embrace, his heart still pounding and his head throbbing.

‘We’ve done everything we can for her but it never seems to be enough’ he whispered in the darkness.

‘That’s not true, Neal’ Sara said, running her hand through his hair. ‘She’s come an awful long way but she’s scared. Except for us, her connection to your mom is probably the most intimate relationship she’s ever had in her life and now she’s terrified she’s going to lose her.’

Neal let out a strange sound, part sob, part tortured laugh and Sara squeezed him tight. This was rough on him too; preparing to lose his mom almost as soon as he’d found her. It was heartbreaking to watch and Sara realized she needed to keep a close eye on her husband to make sure he didn't start to fall apart. Since his mom’s hospitalization, he’d been coping better than expected but she feared that these recent developments with Caitlin might just be enough to push him over the edge and she couldn't bear the thought of him giving in to his addiction, not when he’d worked so hard to get his life back on track. 

‘Neal’ she murmured as she felt him start to relax in her arms. ‘Honey, promise me you’ll talk to me before you decide to have a drink.’

‘I’m not going to have a drink, Sara’ he replied, sounding mildly annoyed. ‘I’m not going back down that rabbit hole. Ever.’

‘I believe you but sometimes things… well, situations can get out of control and they can get the better of us. You wouldn't be the first to give in, you know.’

Neal sighed loudly and pulled his wife closer, his arms tightly wound around her waist, his face buried against her soft, warm chest.

‘She made a mess of the car’ he said out of the blue, surely his way of deflecting from the uncomfortable conversation.

‘We’ll get her to clean it up in the morning’ Sara replied matter of factly. 

The sun would be coming up in another couple of hours and she could feel herself start to drift off. ‘Do you think you’ll be able to get some sleep now?’

‘Yeah’ he said simply, looking up at her and smiling weakly. ‘Did you say something about a back rub?’

WCWCWC

Liam grumbled as his phone chimed. Dammit! He’d forgotten to mute it after he’d climbed back into bed following the crazy night they’d just had.

‘What?’ he grumbled, half asleep.

‘Hey gorgeous, did I wake you?’ came the voice on the other end.

‘Yes’ Liam replied curtly as he came to.

‘Awww, baby, I thought you’d be glad to hear from me.’

‘Sorry Todd, rough night’ Liam countered.

‘Are you out partying without me, baby?’ the man asked.

‘No… I… What time is it anyway?’ Liam asked, sitting up in bed.

‘It’s past ten o’clock and my folks went out to get a few things. I’ve just been lying here, you know… thinking of you.’

Liam cringed; his new boyfriend - for lack of a better word - was a little on the needy side and this was the first time they’d been apart since they’d started dating about twelve weeks earlier.

‘Oh yeah?’ Liam said, his tone softening. 

‘Are you missing me?’ Todd cooed.

‘To be honest, it’s been pretty busy around here. Everybody wants to get together while I’m town.’

There was silence on the other end and Liam could well imagine the man pouting, his lower lip protruding as it always did when he didn't get what he wanted. After a moment, there was a cough followed by a long suffering sigh.

‘Are you going to be seeing all your old boyfriends while you’re in New York?’ he asked, setting a trap for Liam to step into.

Liam ignored the question; he enjoyed spending time with Todd but he wasn’t big on all that clingy stuff.

‘So when are you going back?’ he asked, changing the subject.

‘Probably on the 3rd. You?’ Todd replied.

‘I’ll probably just get back the night before classes start, you know, try to make this a real holiday with my family before we have to buckle down again. I think my dad’s going to be driving me back.’

‘Okay…’ Todd said, disappointment obvious in his voice. ‘I was hoping we’d have a few days together before we have to get back to the grind.’

He giggled before continuing. ‘Or at least the work grind’ he said suggestively as Liam smiled.

The guy did have a very hot body and Liam had been more than eager to explore every inch of it, truth be told.

‘I’ll let you know when I get back’ Liam said as he heard some muted sounds outside his bedroom door, followed by a soft knock.

‘I gotta go. Take care Todd. I’ll talk to you later.’

The door opened and Sara stood there with a cup of coffee in her hand. 

‘Is it okay if I come in?’ she asked tentatively.

‘Yeah, sure Mom, come on in’ he said, taking in the heavenly aroma and reaching to take the cup from her hand. ‘That’s just what I need… after last night.’

‘So, what’s going on?’ he added. ‘Did Dad manage to get any sleep?’

‘Some’ Sara admitted. ‘It took him a while to settle, he was pretty riled up.’

Liam took a sip of his coffee and sighed. ‘With good reason’ he said.

‘Oh, honey… I know you and Caitlin have a… strained relationship but —’

‘It’s not strained, Mom’ he interrupted. ‘I just hate seeing her play you guys all the time. You don’t deserve all that crap.’

‘She’s not playing us, sweetie. She’s… messed up and she acts out without thinking sometimes. And with your grandmother sick… well, she hasn't been coping all that well.’

Liam rolled his eyes. He’d been putting up with Caitlin Somersby’s antics for years but what irked him most of all was the effect the young woman had on his parents and more particularly his dad who’d given so much of himself, just so she could have a better life.

‘She doesn't deserve everything you’ve done for her’ he said in a rare show of frustration.

‘Liam, listen to yourself. No one chooses the situation they’re born into. Not everybody can be as lucky as you and your sister.’

‘That’s just it, Mom. Caitlin’s been living with us for what… four years? You’ve given her every chance imaginable and then she goes and pulls this stupid stunt and Dad goes running after her.’

Sara could see she wasn't going to be winning this argument any time soon. She gave in to her impulses and reached out to run her hand through Liam’s thick, golden hair, bracing for him to pull away as he usually did. She was surprised when he just smiled up at her, giving in to her gentle touch.

‘Was that Todd on the phone?’ she asked, changing the subject.

‘Yeah’ Liam replied.

‘Do you miss him?’ she asked.

She and Neal hadn't actually met the young man but they’d been hearing all about him; they hadn't been overly impressed by what they’d heard so far. It was obvious that their son was settling; the poor unsuspecting guy was probably nothing more than a rebound off Cody.

‘Miss him?’ Liam repeated, seemingly baffled by the question. ‘Not exactly… we’ve only been seeing each other for a couple of months, Mom.’

In late summer, before they’d both set off to university, Liam and his longtime boyfriend, Cody Miller, had grudgingly decided to part ways. Long distance relationships were tough at the best of times and they were both too young to be tied down exclusively. Although the decision had been arrived at mutually, Sara knew that her son had wanted to do the noble thing by cutting Cody loose. The breakup had been painful for him and she’d never been convinced that it was what he really wanted. But now, he’d met this new guy at school and seemed happy to be spending time with him, something Sara was thankful for.

‘So you really like this guy, huh?’ she asked, fishing.

Liam seemed to ponder the question, taking a sip of coffee. It was weird to talk about your relationships with your parents yet Sara had always been matter of fact about it and he’d been lulled into a sense of security. No details, though; just as he had no interest in knowing about his parents’ sex life, he wasn't about to share any intimate details about his own.

‘He’s fun to be around and he’s… well, he’s outgoing and he knows a lot of people on campus. He’s been good about helping me get involved with the LGBT Resource Centre.’

Sara listened and nodded. Although he was probably the furthest thing from being an activist, her son was an out, proud gay man and had always counted on Cody to be the advocate in their relationship.

‘I’m glad’ she said, getting to her feet. ‘Maybe I’ll get to meet him next time I come up to visit.’

Liam smiled shyly. ‘So, what’s going on with Caitlin?’

‘She’s in the shower, looking like death warmed over’ Sara commented. ‘Your dad is downstairs, waiting for her to come down so he can hit her with a long list of things he wants her to do to make up for her little… misadventure.’

‘Aren’t we having brunch?’ Liam asked, sounding like a ten-year-old version of himself. Sunday morning brunch was sacred in the Caffrey home, always had been, and he’d been looking forward to his dad’s blueberry pancakes.

‘Yeah, yeah of course we are’ she said. ‘Hope and Cam are already here and Uncle Mozzie is going to drop by. Uncle Peter and Aunt Elizabeth are coming too.’

‘Mom? Are you telling me everything? Is there something wrong with Dad?’

‘No honey, there’s nothing wrong with your dad. He’s just… well, he’s been worried about Grandma and I worry about him’ she replied with a twisted smile.

Liam chuckled. ‘I’ll be down in a few minutes’ he announced as his feet hit the floor.

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

A half foot of snow was a bitch to clean off your car at the best of times but when the snow plow had come by and snowed you in… well, that was the whole package.

Peter worked diligently, shivering as he shovelled and scraped; maybe Neal had the right idea living in Westchester County, where you could have a two car garage and your own private driveway.

He could see Elizabeth lurking in the living room window, evaluating his progress. They were due over at the Caffreys for brunch and she was eager to get on the road - something about not ruining the cheese soufflé she’d just taken out of the oven.

Thoughts of their early morning talk lingered in Peter’s mind, thoughts of trips to tropical islands, leisurely mornings in bed and the endless freedom enjoyed by the independently wealthy - or as El had explained with a twinkle in her eye, those lucky enough to be retired. She had been on his case lately about calling it quits at the gallery and that morning, as they lay in bed, she’d begun to speak in much more definitive terms about a double retirement - with specific dates and detailed plans for their future. 

Retirement had its appeal, to be sure. After all, Peter was in his early seventies and, although generally healthy, he didn't have the same stamina he'd had in his youth. But even as El had described endless days on a beach somewhere and leisurely breakfasts on their back yard patio, Peter had to admit that something didn't feel quite right. 

This wasn't his first foray into retirement; seven years earlier when he'd left the Bureau, he’d briefly given it a try but life had intervened, forcing him to step up when Neal had gotten shot and had been sidelined for several months. Peter had been more than happy to pick up the slack at the Raphael while his best friend was on the mend and he’d found, to his surprise, that he really enjoyed life in the Chelsea Art District. Sure, Cameron had been working at the gallery part time but he was still in school back then and Neal had needed someone trustworthy to keep an eye on things - something Peter had been more than happy to do. The short term arrangement had morphed into a bona fide partnership when Peter had offered to buy half the gallery and the two best friends had been partners ever since. Now that Neal had turned his attention almost exclusively to running the June Ellington School of Art, Peter had taken over the overall management of the Raphael with Cameron as his right hand man and Hope running the gallery’s various art classes. 

Elizabeth had argued there was no better time to take the plunge; she was ready to sell Burke Premiere Events to Yvonne Mackenzie, her second in command and Cameron was more than capable of taking over the day to day management of the gallery. It was time to think about themselves, she’d contended — and in the moment, Peter had been unable to come up with any strong arguments to the contrary. Nevertheless, the thought of leaving it all behind for good was, for lack of a better word, scary. Sure, El had painted a pretty picture of what retirement might look like and Peter was fully aware that he couldn't hang around the Raphael forever. Visions of being rolled into the gallery in a wheelchair and having to adjust his hearing aid in order to speak to the customers… yeah, nobody wanted that. But he was still healthy and energetic and he did love the daily routine of driving into Manhattan and spending the day surrounded by beautiful art and stimulating people, not the least of which was one of his favourite individuals in the whole world, his beautiful goddaughter.

‘How much longer?’ he heard El call out, snapping him out of his reverie.

She stood at the top of the steps to the house, her sweater wrapped tightly around her body as she shivered.

‘Just two more minutes!’ he called back as the door closed and El disappeared inside.

Peter was a firm believer in the age-old credo: happy wife, happy life. Why rock the boat? It was never going to be easy to walk away from the gallery and maybe El had a point, maybe the time had come to finally call it a day.

WCWCWC

The smell of Italian roast permeated the air in the Caffrey kitchen, an invitation for all to congregate and share the Sunday brunch prepared by their patriarch - with a little help from the troops. Hope perched herself on the nearby kitchen counter, facing her dad as he grinned at her; although she still had one foot in the house, she spent an awful lot of time at Cam’s and Neal missed having her around. 

’You’re looking pretty spry this morning’ he commented as he stirred the pancake batter. ‘I thought you guys had a party with some of Cam’s old friends from university last night.’

‘We did. We got to bed around three’ Hope said with a sideways glance in Cam’s direction. They might have hit the sheets at three but they hadn’t actually gone to sleep until well past four - a testament to their youth and stamina.

‘I wish I could look that energetic on four hours of sleep’ Neal remarked with an eyebrow wag.

He was feeling pretty beat up following the eventful night they’d had. As well as the physical fatigue, there was the emotional upheaval and the constant second guessing when it came to how to deal with their unruly foster child. He and Sara had talked for a long time, debating the merits of tough love. Pushing Caitlin away would only leave her flailing at a time when she needed help the most. 

Neal flashed back to a comic strip which had hung on their fridge for the longest time when the kids were young, a reminder of how much children needed their parents’ support - especially when they weren't being particularly angelic. The cartoon depicted a toddler, losing control of his emotions and standing in the middle of a mess of his making, asking his mom for a kiss goodnight. When she gave him the cold shoulder and replied that she wasn’t inclined to kiss him goodnight when he misbehaved, the little boy had looked up with tears in his eyes. ‘But Mom, that’s when I need it most.’

Caitlin’s recent behaviour was classic ‘acting out’ whether she realized it or not. She needed Neal and Sara more than ever as she dealt with Linda’s declining health and the likelihood that she wouldn't be around much longer. Taking a hard line with Caitlin was a double edged sword and might lead to a permanent estrangement neither one of them wanted and yet, they couldn't condone this kind of behaviour, no matter the reasons behind it. 

‘Honey, can you grab the blueberries from the fridge for me?’ Neal asked his daughter.

Hope jumped off the counter spryly and jogged over to the fridge. Neal shook his head in response to her unbridled energy; thank God, their beautiful girl had come back to them. There were moments following her accident when he’d feared she would never be the same again and although there were definite repercussions from the ordeal, she had come out the other end relatively unscathed and Neal was eternally grateful for that fact.

‘How many place settings, Mr. Caffrey?’ Cam asked as he stood there, counting out cutlery.

Neal did a little bit of mental math. ‘Seven… no, eight’ he said, turning back to look at Hope.

‘I was thinking of going to visit Grandma this afternoon, you interested in tagging along?’ he asked.

‘Yeah, of course. How is she doing?’

Neal looked away, concentrating on mixing the berries into the pancake batter - or at least, pretending to. It was hard to talk about his mom without getting upset. As it was, he cringed every time the phone rang, fearful that the call was bringing the sad news that she’d passed away. 

‘She’s still not well enough to get out of bed on her own but it’s nice to finally have her out of the hospital and back where she belongs’ he commented with a heavy heart.

‘I guess that means she won’t be coming to the New Year’s Eve party, huh?’ Hope asked, sadly.

‘No, that’s not going to happen’ Neal replied with regret. He’d been looking forward to hosting the festivities this year and having his mom there to celebrate with the rest of the family would have been the icing on the cake. Alas, these days, the frail woman could barely remain awake for more than a few minutes at a time and Neal had been forced to watch helplessly from the sidelines as her health continued to decline. 

‘You know, I was thinking we could all go over on New Year’s Day and have dinner with her. They have that communal kitchen we can use and we can bring our own food’ he suggested, brightening up a little at the thought. 

‘Sounds good’ Cam said. ‘We don’t have any other plans, huh, babe?’

With Cam’s family upstate, the couple’s social activities during the holidays revolved mostly around the extended Caffrey family and some of their friends from school. 

‘Yeah, sure Dad. We’ll be there’ Hope said, bringing her hand to rest on his back. 

She looked around the quiet kitchen. ‘So, what’s the deal? It’s like a morgue around here. Where are Liam and Mom, anyway? And what about Caitlin? She’s usually down here, helping out.’

Neal exhaled slowly, unsure just how much he wanted to share about the latest goings on; he was trying to keep his temper in check although he certainly hadn't held back when he’d chewed Caitlin out earlier. He’d sent her off to get cleaned up, making his expectations clear: she had apologies to make to him and Liam and she was expected to clean the mess she’d left behind including the mammoth disaster in the back seat of the car. Short of that, he couldn't very well send her up to her room without dinner; after all, she was nineteen not three years old - despite the way she’d been behaving. 

‘She’s… in the shower, I think’ Neal explained as Cam and Hope exchanged puzzled looks. ‘Mom’s upstairs with Liam. They’ll be down in a minute.’

Raffie let out a friendly bark and ran to the front door just as it opened to reveal Mozzie, bundled up in a warm winter coat and a fur hat making him look like he’d just arrived from the great white north. Why the conman always felt he needed to make some grand entrance was beyond Neal but after all these years, his over the top appearances were par for the course. 

‘Neal!’ he called out from the front hall. ‘The snow plow came by and there’s a snow bank the size of Mount Rushmore at the end of your driveway!’ 

Neal let out a sigh of exasperation; having to go out and shovel his driveway had not been on his agenda.

‘I’ll do it’ Cam said without hesitation, making his way to the front door to climb into his coat and boots.

Neal smiled and glanced at Hope. ‘I think he’s a keeper, sweet pea’ he declared as he returned to flipping the pancakes. 

Mozzie appeared, immediately scoping out the situation and zeroing in on the food littering the kitchen counter. Neal could tell by the look of determination on his face that the older man was starved; it seemed that the only proper meals Mozzie ever got was when he came over to freeload - which was… well, pretty well all the time. 

‘Hey Uncle Mozzie!’ Hope called out as she sauntered over to where he stood, salivating. She placed a welcome peck on her uncle’s cheek and watched him smile in response.

’Mmmm’ Mozzie moaned, his attention immediately shifting to the plateful of bacon which lay on the counter, awaiting the arrival of the rest of the guests. He grabbed a couple of slices and popped them into his mouth. 

‘What? No sausages?’ he asked, his mouth full.

‘Good morning to you too, Moz!’ Neal replied with an exasperated shake of his head. 

WCWCWC

‘You sure you’re okay, honey?’ Elizabeth asked, glancing over at her husband. ‘You’ve been awfully quiet.’

‘Yeah, I’m fine’ he replied, his eyes on the road.

The sound of the car heater hummed, providing a modicum of warmth and Elizabeth rubbed her hands together in an effort to create some much needed heat.

‘You know, you don't have to tell Neal right away. You can wait until after the holidays’ she reminded him. 

‘I know… I’ll think about it’ Peter replied.

‘You’re sure you’re ready to take the plunge?’ she asked for the second time in as many minutes.

‘Honey, I told you. If you’re ready to retire, then I’m ready to retire’ he said although his tone seemed to belie his words.

Elizabeth smiled and let out a sigh of satisfaction. She reached over to squeeze his thigh. ‘It’s going to be amazing, you’ll see. We can travel and we can do whatever we want… all the time!’

Peter forced a smile, glancing over at his wife. ‘You’re right, it’s going to be amazing.’

A little voice whispered in his ear. ‘Just keep telling yourself that, Burke.’

WCWCWC

‘It’s just us!’ came Elizabeth’s voice as the front door of the Caffrey home opened once more. 

Within seconds, the newcomers invaded the kitchen, hugs all around as Elizabeth set out their contributions for the brunch: homemade ginger and currant scones and the aforementioned soufflé which was looking a little worse for wear for having travelled in sub-zero temperatures. 

Before long, Liam and Sara made an appearance and the sounds in the kitchen grew louder, cheery voices competing with the sound of bowls clattering against utensils as food was placed on the table and guests began to assemble around the feast. Raffie wandered from one guest to the next, tail wagging enthusiastically, gladly taking any handout he could get as the table was set and the food was laid out.

Hope made another pot of coffee and Cameron, who’d returned from shovelling duty, got busy putting out croissants and toasting bread and bagels using the four slice toaster which was a very well used appliance in the Caffrey kitchen. Neal finished up with the pancakes and eggs and Sara put out some yogurt and jam for the scones while Liam made sure everyone had something to drink. They were a well oiled machine, everyone sharing in the brunch preparation, a happy occasion indeed - if it wasn't for Caitlin and her shenanigans. 

‘Where’s Caitlin?’ Neal whispered to his wife when she got within hearing range. 

Sara leaned in closer and patted him on the bum reassuringly. ‘She’s just getting dressed.’

Her eyes narrowed as she saw his reaction, remnants of anger in his eyes. ‘Breathe, Neal’ she reminded him, squeezing his arm. 

Neal had been very clear about his expectations and he hoped the teen wasn’t in a defiant mood; he couldn't take another round of arguing so soon after her mammoth meltdown. He was just about to go up and check on her when she appeared, her face sober and, without being seen by the houseful of guests, she headed over to the broom closet by the basement stairs while Neal observed from nearby. He watched as she pulled out a pail and got up on her tip toes, reaching for some rags on the top shelf.

Neal looked around, noticing everyone was engaged in conversation and he made his way over to where his foster daughter stood, preparing to make good on her promise to clean up her mess. He stared into her eyes, his gaze stern and he took her arm, pulling her towards the front hall, out of view of the rest of the guests.

She avoided his eyes and waited for what she expected would be another outburst from her foster dad; she was more than surprised when he finally spoke. 

‘Come and have brunch first, you can do that later’ he stated, his voice emotionless.

‘I’m… I don’t think I’m very good company right now’ she grumbled, avoiding his gaze.

‘I don’t give a crap if you’re good company or not’ he declared, a vestige of anger still apparent in his voice. ‘We’ve got people over and the whole family is here.’ 

He hesitated for a brief moment before continuing. ‘And for better or for worse, that includes you. Now, come on. You can clean the car when everybody’s gone.’ 

She finally let her eyes meet his, seeing the disappointment there and it cut through her like a knife; he really didn't deserve all this grief and for the life of her, she couldn't quite understand why she’d behaved so irresponsibly.

‘Okay’ she murmured. She followed her foster dad back to the kitchen and pasted a smile on her face; he wasn't the only one who could fake it when required.

WCWCWC

Having a houseful of family and friends had always been one of Neal Caffrey’s favourite things. Perhaps it was the fact that it was the perfect counterpoint to the deathly silence he'd had to endure in the home he’d shared with his mom, growing up. There had been nothing but glumness and despair in the small apartment in St. Louis and Neal had grown up dreaming of a house full of wonderful smells and laughter, a place that was safe and where everyone could congregate to find solace and comfort. 

Some days, he still couldn't believe he was really living the dream.

‘Dad? Dad?’ he heard Hope say as she tugged on his shirt sleeve.

‘What? What is it, sweet pea?’

‘I was just t-t-telling Uncle Peter that Cam and I are going to drive up to Watertown to see his folks the week after next. Is that okay with you?’ 

Neal’s eyes moved to look at his wife, sitting across the table from him. That very slight stammer was a definite tell - a sign that Hope was slightly uncomfortable or nervous about something. Sara gave him a small smile; maybe something was up with the kids, after all.

Neal glanced over at Peter; on any given day, he knew a lot more about what was going at the gallery than Neal did.

‘Yeah, of course. We can staff the place, can’t we, Peter?’ he asked him, eyebrows raised.

‘Of course, we’ll call in some of the casuals and… what about the classes?’ he asked both Neal and Hope.

The art classes had begun as a lark, really. Almost an afterthought. But they’d developed into one of the more interesting and distinguishing features of the Raphael. There was always a waiting list to get in and they ran the gamut from senior classes to sessions for kids as young as five years old. Hope had taken a real shine to teaching and she even ran a couple of the classes over at the school of art on occasion. As a matter of fact, the popularity of the classes at the Raphael had been Neal’s inspiration to open the school of art in the first place; all those kids who had an interest in art but didn't have the means to pay for classes. 

Thank you, June Ellington, he reflected with a sad smile.

Hope looked over at her uncle then back to her fiancé. ‘It’s only for one week’ she reminded them. ‘I suppose we could always reschedule them… add a session on at the end or maybe one of the part timers can step in?’

Neal nodded; they’d figure it out. ‘So…’ he couldn’t help but say, turning to look at his future son-in-law. ‘Any special reason you’re going upstate to visit your folks?’

Again, he noticed a small exchange of glances between Hope and Cameron. Or perhaps he just imagined it.

Cameron spoke up, taking the pressure off Hope. ‘No, it’s just that… they’ve been asking us to visit for months and we didn't make it up for the holidays so…’ 

Neal nodded. He was pretty sure there was more to it than that but until Hope and Cam were ready to spill the beans… well, he and Sara would just have to wait.

Elizabeth, being Elizabeth, just charged ahead and asked the question which had been on everybody’s mind.

‘So, with New Years right around the corner, do you two think this might be the year you finally tie the knot? You know, I’m dying to plan another wedding.’

Sara cleared her throat and looked down at her plate; she and Neal had been biting their tongue, waiting for Cameron and Hope to finally set a date. But they’d both agreed that the decision belonged to the kids and that they needed to wait for them to decide.

Everybody grew quiet as they waited for the answer with bated breath. It had been a long engagement, dating back to before Hope’s horrific accident and the couple was working through the aftermath as well as getting enough money together to get a new place before they walked down the aisle.

‘Hum…’ Hope said, smiling coyly. ‘I d-d-don’t know…’

Cameron came to her rescue, reaching out to take her hand and bringing his lips to her knuckles. He turned to face the group, hoping to put a definitive end to the grilling. 

‘But you’ll be the first to know’ he said as Liam giggled.

‘Good deflection there, Cam’ the young man told his future brother-in-law, clasping him on the shoulder.

There was nervous titter all around as the awkwardness slowly began to dissipate. 

‘So’ Neal said as he stood and began collecting the empty plates. ‘I don’t want to be a party pooper but…some of us have things we need to do.’

His eyes turned to look in Caitlin’s direction. She was already on her feet, helping to clear the table. She’d been quiet all through brunch, polite, yet not terribly talkative and Neal took the pile of dishes from her hands as he gave her a head nod towards the garage where the car had been parked waiting for the necessary clean-up. It didn't take much more than a mere glance in that direction to get her going and suddenly, everyone was on their feet.

Before long, the Burkes and Mozzie had departed, leaving Hope, Cameron and Liam to the clean-up as Sara and Neal sat back, enjoying one last cup of coffee while their kids bustled around them.

‘Where did Caitlin disappear to?’ Hope asked rather innocently, immediately feeling the tension rising in the room. 

‘She’s just… cleaning the car’ Sara said, avoiding her daughter’s gaze.

‘Cleaning the car?’ Hope repeated with a laugh as she looked over at Liam, expecting to see him sharing in the joke. 

His face grew tense, eyes narrowing as he looked away. She knew her brother like the back of her hand and she could tell he was in no mood to talk. Whatever had transpired, he wasn't up to talking about it - at least not yet.

Liam fiddled with throwing a couple of containers into the small recycling bin and he picked it up, heading towards the garage.

‘I’m going to go… get rid of… this’ he muttered, walking away. 

Hope continued, not done with the subject. She turned to look at her mom. ‘What do you mean, cleaning the car? It’s like… below zero out there.’

She noticed a quick exchange of looks between her mom and dad and she put down the dishes she’d been holding in her hands. 

‘All right, what’s going on?’ she demanded. ‘What did she do this time?’

WCWCWC

Neal stepped out of the powder room. He could hear the soft sound of Cameron and Hope’s voices floating from the kitchen where they sat with Sara, chatting away. He felt a sudden chill and noticed the door leading to the garage had been left slightly ajar. He’d just reached out to close it when he heard the sound of Liam’s voice echoing loudly behind the door, stopping him dead in his tracks.

‘Dad was a mess last night. How do you think he felt, having to drive all the way out there only to have to carry your sorry ass back home?’ Liam raged. ‘You could have been arrested.’

Caitlin’s quiet voice was heard replying something Neal couldn't quite make out and Liam interrupted her, his voice growing even louder.

‘Why are you acting like such a jerk, anyway?’ he asked, his angry voice resonating in the cavernous space.

Neal leaned in and heard Caitlin mumble something indiscernible; no match for the raging tirade that continued to spout from his furious son. 

‘I don’t give a shit, Caitlin!’ he shouted, staring her down. ‘Don’t you think this is hard on Dad too? She’s his mom, for chrissake! And she’s my grandmother. You know, you’re not the only one who’s upset!’ 

Liam took a deep breath but he obviously wasn't done with the brutal attack. ‘All you ever do is think about yourself. Act now. Think later… or don’t think at all.’

Neal stood in silence, swallowing hard, mesmerized as he listened to the exchange.

‘Do you have any idea what you’re putting my parents through?’ Neal heard him say, his voice bitter. ‘My dad has done everything he possibly can to help you and all you do is take advantage of him. Every single time, Caitlin. Every! Fucking! Time!’

Neal stood, paralyzed, peeking into the garage through the crack in the door. Liam was standing there, his arms waving wildly, his legs set apart in a gesture of aggression, angry eyes staring out towards the car where, ostensibly, Caitlin had been working. Neal couldn't see Caitlin’s face from where he stood and his eyes remained glued on his son who was having a rather uncharacteristic tantrum. 

‘You know, you’ve been nothing but trouble ever since you came into this family’ he heard his son shouting. 

‘I wish you’d never come to live here. I… I HATE YOU!’ he spat out vehemently.

The last few words spurred him into action and Neal reached for the doorknob and yanked the door open, staring in disbelief at his son, standing there, his face red, his eyes hardened, not at all the caring young man he knew him to be.

‘LIAM!’ he shouted, surprising even himself with the shrillness of his voice. ‘That’s enough!’

Liam turned, shocked to find his father in the doorway, staring back at him. How long had he been standing there and what exactly had he heard?

He glared at Neal defiantly and strode towards him, thrusting the door wide open and pushing past him, eyes full of fury. 

‘I should have known you’d take her side’ he bellowed as he made his way back into the house, almost knocking Neal over in the process. ‘You always do!’

Neal’s eyes moved to look at Caitlin, standing there in obvious shock. Who knew how long Liam had been standing there, berating her. From his spot in the doorway, Neal could see her eyes heavy with tears, her hand still clasping the bucket of water she’d been using to clean the back seat of the car. She turned away, unwilling to show any weakness and returned to work, leaving Neal to stand there, dumbfounded.

TBC


	4. Chapter 4

Mel’s Diner hadn’t changed one bit. Of course, he’d only been away for four months but still… it seemed like some things never changed. 

Liam had eaten there countless times over the years; leisurely Saturday morning brunches with his dad, sometimes with the whole family. It was beyond ordinary yet comforting and reassuring in its simplicity and familiarity. The special — two eggs, bacon or sausage, unlimited toast, home fries and all the coffee you could stomach — went for the modest sum of 6.99. The menu itself hadn't changed in over twenty years… just the prices. Every once in a while, someone in the group would deviate from the routine and order the waffles or the pancakes but their reaction was always the same: disappointment at the realization that even Mel couldn’t live up to Poppa Neal’s Sunday morning blueberry pancakes.

As always, Liam was greeted by everybody’s favourite waitress — and the reigning queen of the establishment — Sonia or, as some liked to call her, Mrs. Mel.

‘Liam! I didn’t know you were back in town’ she said, glancing over his shoulder with searching eyes. ‘Is your dad joining you?’

‘No… no. I’m meeting a friend’ young Caffrey replied with a forced smile.

The woman’s practiced glance swept the restaurant for available tables; the Saturday brunch crowd was finally thinning out.

‘Well, what do you know’ she said with a friendly smile. ‘Your usual table just opened up.’ 

Liam’s eyes moved towards the booth overlooking the parking lot where he usually sat with his dad. He followed the woman over and took the menus from her outstretched hand - although, he wouldn't be eating much, considering he’d just feasted on a mega-brunch back home.

‘Shall I bring over some coffee?’ she asked as he settled, throwing his coat over the back of his chair.

‘Yeah. Make it two. Thanks Sonia’ the young man said.

His breathing had only just started to return to normal, his pounding heartbeat slowing to a more regular cadence. He’d left the house in such a hurry, he’d forgotten to grab some gloves and he exhaled into his hands, his warm breath welcome on his frozen digits. He hadn't been in the mood for any more confrontations and, as soon as he’d been able to do so without being seen, he’d slipped out of the house, calling out to his mom that he’d be back in a little while.

His throat felt raw from all the shouting he'd done and he coughed, reaching for the glass of water on the table and taking a nice long sip. He couldn't believe how he'd lost it, screaming at the top of his lungs for the whole neighbourhood to hear. Myrtle Stevens would no doubt have a field day, gossiping with the neighbours about the shouting match she’d overheard in the Caffrey garage. 

When he’d stepped into the garage to dump the garbage in the recycle bin, he'd been surprised to find Caitlin standing there. In hindsight, why he’d been startled by her presence was beyond him; he knew that at some point, she’d be going out there to clean the mess she’d made of the car. Seeing her staring back at him with that look of defiance on her face had been enough to light his very short fuse and before he knew what had hit him, he’d erupted like a geyser. 

As a rule, Liam Theodore Caffrey was the furthest thing from combative; his style was decisively calm, thoughtful and introspective. As a matter of fact, he was often faulted for not speaking his mind. He preferred to listen thoughtfully and reflect before emitting an opinion or confronting someone. But in this case, it had taken a mere arch of her eyebrow and a quiet scoff on Caitlin’s part to finally push him over the edge and turn him into a raving lunatic. 

She’d been a thorn in his side ever since she’d moved in, sucking up all the oxygen in the house and leaving room for nothing and no one but herself. Liam let out a long slow breath as he conceded that his assessment was a slight exaggeration. Having Caitlin sharing their home had certainly not hindered his and Hope’s close relationship with either of their parents. As a matter of fact, his mom and dad were totally devoted to him and his older sister and would do just about anything for the two of them; Caitlin’s presence hadn't changed that. But the wayward teen seemed to thrive on creating havoc and it had always irked Liam that her crazy antics managed to succeed in capturing his folks attention… being the squeaky wheel and all. 

Truth was, he didn't really begrudge her getting the help and support she needed. After all, she had her moments; she was smart and witty and she could be a lot of fun to be with. What irritated him more than anything else was how her presence affected his parents, especially his dad. Ever since Neal had met the young woman at the school of art, he’d been on a crusade to ‘save’ the teen from herself, to bring her back from the edge of the precipice and help her succeed. He’d given her ample opportunity to prove herself and each time she disappointed him, he would rant and rave but he would always give her one last chance, only to be disillusioned when she screwed up yet again.

But his dad wasn't getting any younger and Liam hated to see him struggling, reminiscent of the days and months following Hope’s accident. They had come close to losing him for good when he’d fallen into the deep dark pit of depression and Liam had no interest in watching a replay of that horrible time in their lives. His worst fear was that Caitlin and her unacceptable behaviour might push him to the brink, once again. 

Surprisingly, his mom had been a stabilizing force for both Caitlin and his dad. Sara’s no nonsense approach to parenting had been just what the teen needed: some tough love without the same intense emotions that Caitlin always elicited in his dad.

He got it. He knew his dad had had a rough time growing up and that he wanted to try to keep Caitlin from ending up in the crapper but still… why he kept putting up with her antics was beyond him. In Liam’s mind, it was plain and simple: Caitlin Somersby was more trouble than she was worth and his parents should have kicked her out of the house a long time ago. She wasn't a vulnerable sixteen year-old any more and if he could learn to live independently in another city, well, so could she. He shook his head, trying to reason with himself, the little voice in his head reminding him that if it wasn't for his parents’ support, financial and otherwise, he wouldn't be doing much standing on his own two feet, either. 

He ran his hand through his hair and looked out towards the parking lot, noticing Will Allenby’s old Suzuki drive up, the muffler so loud, it could be heard reverberating throughout the diner. Will was always there for him, always had been, and especially now, with Cody out of the picture, he appreciated having his best friend to confide in. Liam’s thoughts lingered on Cody Miller for a brief moment as he recalled his ex’s kind hazel eyes, his sweet smile and the persistent butterflies he got in the pit of his stomach whenever Cody was within a fifty feet of him. He missed him and he wished things could be different between them but, hey… that was all in the past. He had to concentrate on the future and Todd Greenway was a pretty good distraction, at least for the time being. 

His attention shifted to the tall young man who stood before him, arms open wide in expectation. Liam shuffled to his feet and hugged his best friend, tapping him on the back enthusiastically in that typically ‘hetero’ way guys have of hugging.

‘Thanks for coming’ he murmured, taking his seat. 

‘Hey, you call, I come running’ Will said with a teasing smile. ‘Isn’t that how it’s always been between us?’

Liam shook his head in exasperation and smiled, feeling himself relax… finally.

‘Your sick, stupid sense of humour, that’s exactly what I need’ he remarked as Sonia reappeared, coffee pot in hand.

‘Hey Will!’ she called out, immediately recognizing the young man from his previous visits to the diner. ‘What can I get you?’

‘I’ll have the special, bacon and sausages, eggs over easy, double order of toast and…’ he added, glancing at the menu which he pretty well knew by heart. 

‘Oh, and one of those monster cinnamon buns’ he added with a grin. ‘Please.’

‘Liam?’

Liam gave a cursory glance at the menu. ‘I just ate… maybe a piece of apple pie?’

‘Coming right up, boys’ she said cheerfully. 

The two young men exchanged smiles. No matter the miles that separated them now that Liam was away at school, being with his best friend was always easy - like slipping on a pair of comfortable shoes.

‘So, what is it this time? Did you have a fight with your new boyfriend?’ Will asked with a playful grin.

Liam frowned. ‘He’s not my…’ he began as Will scoffed.

‘All right, all right, he is sort of my boyfriend but no, this has nothing to do with Todd.’

Will took a sip of coffee, eyes riveted on his best friend, waiting to hear what had put such a sullen look on his face.

‘I just blew up at Caitlin’ he admitted sheepishly.

‘Blew up?’ Will repeated, incredulous. ‘You blew up?’

In all the years William Allenby had known Liam, he’d never actually witnessed him ‘blowing up’. Liam was the most level headed guy he’d ever met, kind, sweet, thoughtful, never one word louder than the next. If he'd lost it, he must have had a good reason.

‘Yeah’ Liam replied with a sigh. ‘Last night, we got a call that she’d passed out at a party at Jenna’s place.’

‘Jenna? Jenna Moore?’ Will asked in exactly the same tone Liam had used the night before.

‘Yeah. My dad and I went out to get her. It was a shit show by the time we got there, the cops were crawling all over the place and Caitlin was passed out on a couch.’

Will leaned in to listen; he’d heard all the stories about Caitlin Somersby over the years but not so much lately. 

‘I thought she’d stopped all that shit’ he commented. 

‘So did I’ Liam admitted. ‘But since my grandmother’s gotten sick, she’s started acting out again.’

‘What’s this thing she’s got with your grandmother, anyway?’ Will asked, puzzled.

Sonia appeared, arms laden with food and placed the plates in front of them as Liam reflected on what Will had just asked him. She was gone in an instant and Will tucked into his food without waiting for a response from his best friend.

‘I don’t know… she’s never had anybody in her life, really. Except a brother, I think. But she doesn’t talk much about him. And my folks, well, they’re kind of authority figures, I guess. My grandma is a lot more… I don’t know, easy on her. And Caitlin’s job is at the day care in the same building as the nursing home so she spends a lot of time over there.’

He played with his fork, picking at the piece of pie and pulling away a small chunk of apple, bringing it to his mouth without much enthusiasm.

Will, on the other hand, was digging in with gusto, listening as he ate.

‘But it’s not just that’ Liam realized as he spoke. ‘Caitlin’s always been Caitlin… it’s my dad. I worry about him.’

‘Why? Is he sick?’ Will asked, his mouth full.

‘No, no. He’s not sick but… you know, with everything that’s happened…’ Liam began, his voice trailing.

Will knew exactly what Liam was referring to; he’d been there to pick up the pieces back when Neal had fallen apart, following Hope’s accident. He’d seen what Liam’s dad’s descent into alcohol abuse had done to his best friend and as the son of an alcoholic himself, he knew firsthand how painful that could be.

‘What? You’re worried he might start drinking again?’ he asked, concern apparent on his face.

‘I don’t know… maybe… if Caitlin keeps pushing him’ Liam admitted.

‘I thought he was all better, you know, therapy and all that…’ Will said, thinking of his own mother’s struggles with alcohol and wishing she would face up to her issues.

‘He is… he’s been great. As far as I know, he hasn't had a single drop since… you know…’ Liam began, his voice faraway as he recalled that terrible period in their lives. ‘But things happen and… my dad’s only human. What if he can’t take it anymore and he starts drinking again?’

Will studied his best friend and took a sip of coffee before speaking. ‘Liam, your dad knows what’s at stake, he’s a smart guy —’

‘Yeah, a smart guy who fell into a very deep, dark hole’ Liam reminded him. ‘I don’t think alcohol addiction has anything to do with how smart you are.’

Will shrugged; alas, he knew that all too well.

‘If it happened once, it could happen again’ Liam said, his voice sad. 

‘So, what are you going to do about Caitlin?’

Liam’s eyebrows raised, a question mark in his eyes. ‘What am I going to do about Caitlin?’ he repeated.

WCWCWC

‘Maybe I should have gone after him’ Neal muttered as the car heater droned on.

‘I don’t think you could have stopped him’ Sara commented as she lay her hand on his leg, a gesture meant as encouragement, no doubt. ‘He was pretty determined to get the hell out ofDodge.’

‘Still…’ Neal said, his face sad. ‘I hope he’s okay. Where do you suppose he went?’

‘Honey, don’t worry’ Sara attempted, although it was going to take a lot more than a passing reassurance to wipe that look of concern off her husband’s face. ‘He’ll be there when we get back and you two can talk it out.’

Neal looked out at the road ahead, keeping his speed steady as he followed the old beat up Chevy with Hope and Cam safely tucked inside.

‘The worst thing is… he’s right. Maybe we do take Caitlin’s side too often.’

‘Neal…’ Sara implored in an attempt to get him to stop chastising himself.

She watched as he shook his head; he was really at his wits’ end and he seemed to be second guessing every single thing he did when it came to the unruly teen. 

‘You know, when we took Caitlin in, we said we’d never let it interfere with our kids’ he reminded Sara.

‘Neal…’ she began, her voice soft as she squeezed his thigh. ‘I think it’s safe to say that Caitlin is one of our kids.’

He knew she was right. The wayward teen had wormed her way into their hearts and he loved her as if she were his own; perhaps that’s why her acting out hurt so much. And yet, if Liam had reacted so strongly, he and Sara had to hear him out, reassure him that they were there for him too.

‘Liam’s always been so… quiet and… so easy to get along with’ Neal mused.

Sara laughed out loud and he turned to look at her, eyebrows raised.

‘How soon we forget’ she replied with a laugh. ‘Nobody’s perfect, not Liam, not you, not me. But we’re a family and we’re there for each other. That’s what families do, Neal. And right now, Caitlin needs us and we need to be there for her.’

‘But Liam —’

‘Honey, Liam’s going to be fine. You’ll sit down with him, remind him how much you love him and tell him to suck it up as far as Caitlin is concerned.’

Neal didn't look convinced; he hated falling out with his kids. Besides his relationship with Sara, his children were the most important people in his universe and he couldn’t bear it when they argued - even if they did deserve a good talking to. 

‘I don’t know, Sara… Do you think we’re doing the right thing with Caitlin?’

‘Look, she’s back home cleaning up the mess she made instead of visiting Linda and you know that’s got to be killing her’ Sara reminded him. ‘She’s getting the message loud and clear.’

‘I suppose…’ Neal said, forcing a smile. ‘I don’t want my mom to know what’s going on with her, okay?’

‘She won’t hear it from me’ Sara reassured him.

WCWCWC

‘It’s the least I can do’ Liam said, taking out his wallet to pay. ‘I really appreciate you coming out to meet me.’

‘Hey, what else is a guy gonna do when his best friend calls?’ Will replied as he slipped on his coat.

His face brightened as a thought crossed his mind. ‘You are coming to my New Year’s Eve party, right?’ he asked.

‘I told you… I… I don’t know yet’ Liam replied, looking away in order to avoid his scrutiny.

‘Aww, come on Liam! You’re going to have to see him sometime. You can’t keep avoiding all our friends just because you’re worried about bumping into your ex.’

Liam looked up at him with a frown. ‘Right… would you go to a party if Josie was there?’ he asked, knowing full well the answer.

‘That’s different’ Will said without hesitation. ‘She dumped me in front of the whole school on the biggest night of the year. You and Cody… you parted as friends.’

Liam let out a long, slow breath. ‘I’m not promising anything but… I’ll think about it. My parents are having a big party at our house and I’m sure they’ll want me to make an appearance. My uncle Moz is coming over and… Cody’s folks among other people’ he added with a sigh.

‘Well, my New Years Eve bash is going to be epic so you can’t miss it. Just… just come on over whenever you can get away’ the other young man said. ‘I picked up some Stella Artois just for you. You know you can’t say no to Stella.’

‘Yeah…’ Liam said with a soft chuckle. ‘Just what my dad needs. Me, getting plastered so he has to come out and drag me home. Maybe that’s one way I can get his attention.’

WCWCWC

The halls of the Blue Skies Nursing Home were unusually quiet on this Sunday afternoon. Most of the residents were down in the communal areas, visiting with their families… all those who were mobile, anyway.

Neal and Sara led the way down the hall, followed by Hope and Cameron who followed, hands clasped together. This had been home to Linda Bennett for going on four years and generally speaking, it had been a good placement for her. Living nearby was a godsend for both Neal and his mom; she could visit the house whenever she wanted and Neal could pop in to visit her whenever he had some free time, something he found a way of doing several times a week. The Blue Skies Nursing Home offered its residents many amenities and since her arrival, Linda had been an enthusiastic participant of the weekly movie night, the residence’s book club and the Thursday evening cribbage game. She’d been battling stomach cancer for several years but things had stabilized since her arrival in New York and Neal had been looking forward to many more years with his mom nearby.

Alas, Linda had fallen victim to the pneumonia outbreak which had hit the residence in early December and considering her other health issues and her advancing years, she’d been hit hard. She’d been transferred to nearby New Rochelle Hospital just weeks before Christmas, unable to combat the nasty pulmonary infection on her own. For a while there, it was uncertain if she would pull through but she’d rallied and, with just a couple of days before the holidays, she’d been released and returned to the friendlier surroundings of Blue Skies, much to Neal’s relief.

‘Mr. Caffrey!’ one of the staff called out as they strolled by the nursing station.

Neal turned in the direction of the voice. 

‘Your mom was just asking for you about an hour ago’ the woman said.

‘How is she today?’ Sara asked as the foursome gathered around the woman.

‘She’s been restless, slept most of the morning but she’s still coughing a fair bit and it’s keeping her from sleeping soundly. I gave her something for the cough about an hour ago.’

Neal tucked the bouquet of fresh cut flowers he'd brought along against his chest and reached out for Sara’s hand, pulling her in closer to him.

‘Has she been eating?’ he asked.

‘Not much but we’re making sure she’s well hydrated.’

Hope and Cam pulled away and started down the hall towards Linda’s room while Neal and Sara held back.

‘I wanted to ask if we could use the communal kitchen on New Years Day. I thought we’d bring food over for my mom. There’d be maybe… six or seven of us.’

‘Sure, let me check’ the woman said, moving to the nearby office and looking through a stack of papers.

‘Someone reserved it for the dinner hour but you could have it at lunchtime. Would that work?’ she asked, pen in hand.

Neal and Sara exchanged looks, silently consulting with each other. ‘Yeah, yeah, that would be great. Can you put us down for that?’

Within a few minutes, the four of them were settled around Linda, Hope perched at the foot of the bed while Cameron stood nearby and Neal and Sara sat on the only two chairs in the room. Linda was sound asleep, calm enough despite the lingering symptoms of pneumonia. Hopefully, she would wake before they had to leave but no one was particularly keen in rousing her from her peaceful slumber.

The four of them chatted quietly, discussing the menu for a New Years Day brunch. There would be lots of leftovers from the party they’d be hosting the night before and Sara volunteered to pick up a Chelsea bun, a pastry she knew her mother-in-law was particularly fond of. Hope suggested a frittata, easy to make and to transport. They had pretty well finalized the menu when Linda Bennett stirred, her blue eyes peeking out and a smile appearing on her face.

‘Neal’ she murmured, barely audible. 

‘Hey Mom!’ Neal said, instantly getting to his feet and standing by her side, his hand reaching for hers. ‘You looked so peaceful. Having a nice nap?’

She coughed roughly and Sara and Hope exchanged worried looks. She sounded like death warmed over. Neal brought his arm around her to help her sit up and she gave a couple of good loud coughs before finally catching her breath.

‘I was dreaming of Caitlin’ the woman said with a weak smile, her eyes searching the room for the young woman.

‘She’s not here?’ she asked in response to Neal’s silence.

Sara perked up and came to stand on the other side of the bed, taking her mother-in-law’s hand in hers.

‘She said she would come by tomorrow, after her shift at the day care’ she replied, a deflection if ever there’d been one.

The answer seemed to satisfy the old woman and her eyes drifted shut once more. A few seconds later, she opened them again, a tired smile appearing on her lips. 

This time, Hope gently massaged her grandmother’s legs from where she sat at the end of the bed. ‘Grandma, it’s New Years this week and we thought we’d all come over and have brunch with you. Would you like that?’

Linda nodded and smiled, obviously weak. ‘That would be nice, sweetheart’ she said. ‘Will your young man be there?’ 

Cameron stepped forward so she could see his face. ‘I wouldn’t miss it, Mrs. Bennett’ he said.

Linda seemed to relax; surrounded by her loved ones she felt safe and her eyes fluttered shut as Neal continued to hold her hand.

Watching the woman grow weaker and weaker was heartbreaking in and of itself but Sara’s concern extended to the heartbreak she felt as she witnessed the sadness in her husband’s eyes. 

‘Grandma’ Hope said softly as Linda’s eyes opened and she smiled at her granddaughter. ‘I saved you a scone from brunch this morning.’

She pulled out the pastry from a small plastic bag, offering it up to her grandmother as Cameron stood by watching the scene unfold.

‘A scone…’ Linda said, her voice weak. ‘You know my weakness, sweetie.’

She struggled to sit up and Neal gave her a hand, cranking up the bed so she could get upright. Feigning enthusiasm she simply couldn't quite pull off, she looked over at Neal, her eyes brightening.

‘Honey, would you see if you can get me a cup of tea?’ she asked as he scrambled to his feet.

‘Sure, Mom’ he said. ‘Honey or lemon?’

‘Honey’ she replied simply.

Sara inched up on the bed, taking up the spot vacated by Neal and she brought her hand to rest around her mother-in-law’s shoulder while Hope scrounged for a plate to put the scone on.

Linda’s eyes met Sara’s, her gaze intent and Sara knew she wanted to tell her something important. She leaned in as the older woman spoke, her voice trembling. 

‘What is it Linda?’ Sara whispered.

When she spoke, the old lady’s voice was scratchy. ‘Would you see what you can do about getting him not to worry so much.’

Sara nodded and brought her lips to rest on Linda’s forehead. Unfortunately, that was easier said than done.

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

If the weather had been wicked on the way out to meet Will, it was even worse on the way back. The brisk winter wind had picked up and Liam kept his hands buried deep in his coat pockets as he trudged along, cursing his precipitous exit from the house without proper winter gear. He’d insisted that Will drop him off a few streets over to keep from having to make an unnecessary detour and, after thanking his best friend for meeting up with him, Liam stepped out onto the icy streets to make his way home. 

Nothing much had been resolved during their little tête-à-tête, yet his heart felt a little lighter for having shared his troubles with someone who understood what he was going through - and more importantly, who cared. 

The two young men had been friends since middle school, sharing an unbridled passion for basketball and a love of video games and sausage pizza - among other things. When Liam had finally come out of the closet at the age of fourteen, Will Allenby had been one of his staunchest supporters. ‘It’s about time!’ Will had declared with a reassuring smile upon hearing the news. It seemed that his best friend had known all along about Liam’s internal struggle — long before young Caffrey had been ready to go public and yet, he'd waited patiently for Liam to open up when he was good and ready. 

Not that Will hadn't given him ample opportunity to step up to the plate and come clean. There was that time they’d discussed sexual orientation in health class and Will had mentioned that a family friend had recently come out; he’d hoped that would be enough to get Liam to open up. Alas, Liam had shrugged and changed the subject. And then, there was that movie they’d gone to see about a month or so before Liam came out, where one of the characters had been struggling with his sexuality. That time, they’d even talked about how they’d feel if one of their friends came out with Will reassuring Liam that he couldn't care less one way or the other if one of his friends was gay. And still, Liam had remained silent.

Young Caffrey had come close to blurting out his secret so many times but each time, he’d panicked and clammed up, worried about how the news would be received by their group of friends at school. Would they all start acting weird in the change room at basketball practice - or would they shun him and stop inviting him along on guys’ nights out once they knew his deep, dark secret?

Even the prospect of coming out to his folks had left him feeling anxious and it had taken forever for him to talk to the two of them about his recent realization. Despite his parents’ liberal views and his mom’s constant leading questions, Liam had hesitated for months before speaking up for fear of upsetting the delicate balance in his life. 

And then, he’d met Cody Miller. One year his senior, out and proud, president of the school’s Gay Straight Alliance and with the most gorgeous hazel eyes Liam had ever seen. His heart fluttered whenever Cody was around and he was completely taken with the young man’s strength of character, his dry wit, his intelligence and that cute smile that seemed to brighten whenever Liam was around. Contrary to Liam, who’d grown into the realization over time, Cody had always known he was gay and he fully embraced his sexuality, unafraid of what the world might think and more than willing to stand up and fight for gay rights at White Plains District High. Liam had been instantly smitten and suddenly, it had become infinitely more important to be true to himself than to continue worrying about upsetting the apple cart. In the end, the big reveal had been surprisingly easy and painless and he had never looked back.

Liam turned the corner onto Meadowbrook Street, the familiar house in sight. Home. The only home he’d ever known, except for the tiny room he shared with Josh Monteith at Syracuse University. This was the place where all his memories began and ended: where he and Hope argued and made up, where he hung out with friends playing video games, where he and Cody snuck kisses whenever they were left alone for more than two seconds, where his mom had taught him how much soap to use for a load of whites, where his uncle Moz had shown him how to pick a lock and where he shot hoops with his dad for hours on end on warm summer evenings while chatting about the state of the world.

He sighed and pulled up the collar of his coat in an unsuccessful attempt at protecting his frostbitten ears. He got to the edge of the driveway and jogged the rest of the way up, noticing the family’s second car wasn’t there; no doubt his folks were still out, visiting his grandmother. He thought of Caitlin who was likely inside and cringed at the thought of coming face to face with her. She might owe him an apology for her behaviour the previous night but there was no excuse for all the horrible things he’d yelled at her in his moment of fury. Hopefully, Caitlin would remain true to form; she might be annoying, loud, impulsive and argumentative but the one thing Caitlin Somersby was not was spiteful and vindictive.

Liam was met at the front door by Raffie as well as some amazing aromas floating in from the back of the house. He gave the pooch a dismissive pat on the head and shrugged off his coat and boots, the familiar sound of pots and pans echoing through the house. He took a few tentative steps, following the noises into the kitchen and finding Caitlin Somersby, hard at work as she stood by the stove, all burners on. 

‘Liam!’ she said breathlessly upon seeing his face. ‘You’re home!’

‘Hey’ he called out nonchalantly, stepping in a little closer to peek at the contents of the pots simmering on the stove top.

‘So, what’s all this?’ he asked, easing into the uncomfortable conversation.

‘Oh, I thought I’d… your folks and Hope are out visiting Grandma so I thought I’d get dinner started’ she replied with a nervous stutter. 

As far as dinner went, the whole thing looked pretty elaborate. There was stew simmering on one of the back burners alongside a batch of fragrant chili and what looked like spaghetti sauce on one of the front burners. A couple of baking sheets with still warm, sweet smelling cookies sat on the counter next to a batch of heavenly brownies. Either she’d been stress cooking all afternoon or she was really, really hungry. 

A bain-marie with melted chocolate sat on the counter next to a bowl where she’d been busy mixing butter and icing sugar, ready to be combined to make something wonderfully delicious. The brief, awkward silence between them was interrupted by the sound of the timer and Caitlin turned towards the oven, peeking inside.

‘The cake’s ready’ she mumbled as she took out two pans of rich dark cake.

‘You made chocolate cake?’ Liam asked, his taste buds salivating.

‘Yeah, I know it’s your favourite and those are the raisin spice cookies your dad likes so much’ she replied, avoiding his gaze and turning her attention back to mindlessly stirring the spaghetti sauce. 

‘Caitlin…’ Liam began, shifting his weight from one foot to the other; apologies weren’t really his thing, better to just get on with it.

‘I’m… sorry about shouting at you earlier’ he mumbled. 

Caitlin peeked out from underneath her blond bangs and a small smile appeared on her lips. ‘It’s all right’ she murmured softly. ‘I deserved it. I’m the one who’s sorry… about last night.’

Liam couldn’t recall exactly what it was he’d shouted at her after he’d lost control but the last words he’d said before storming out still echoed in his ears and he cringed at the recollection.

‘I… I don’t hate you Caitlin’ he said, his voice soft. ‘I shouldn't have said that. I was just… really, really angry.’

Caitlin looked away and muttered something he couldn't quite make out. 

He leaned in, frowning. ‘What?’ he asked, eyebrows cocked. 

‘I said I get it. I’ve messed up one too many times and I know you worry about your dad. So do I’ she admitted sheepishly.

‘Still, that was no reason to say what I said’ he admitted with a shrug.

‘It’s all right’ she said giving him a brief glance.

She returned to the melted chocolate, pouring it into the creamed butter mixture and turned on the mixer, the sound filling the kitchen.

As far as conversations went, this one was pretty well over and Liam turned to leave, relieved to have gotten his apology off his chest.

‘I’m… I’m going up to my room’ he called out over his shoulder. 

And with that, Betty Crocker sighed loudly and returned to her cake.

WCWCWC

The drive back to Cam’s apartment was quiet as both he and Hope reflected on what had transpired at the Blue Skies Nursing Home. Cam could see how difficult it was for Hope to witness the deterioration of her grandmother’s health and he sat in silence, holding his fiancée’s hand as they traveled the snow covered streets. The last time he’d seen the elderly woman was back in November at a family dinner at the Caffrey home. At the age of eighty-four, and despite her history of stomach cancer and lung problems, Linda Bennett had appeared surprisingly spry that night, getting around with the help of her walker, certainly nothing like the frail woman he’d just left moments before. 

Cam thought back to the first time he’d laid eyes on the woman - that summer afternoon in St. Louis when his future father-in-law had flown the whole family out to meet her for the first time. 

If anything, her health had improved considerably since she’d moved to New York, no doubt due to the fact that she was surrounded by loved ones. Since she’d settled at Blue Skies, Neal and Sara had been steadfast by her side, making sure she had everything she needed. But Cam knew better than anyone that, at such an advanced age, health was fleeting and that things could turn on a dime: one bad case of the flu could spell disaster. His own maternal grandmother had passed away the previous year from what had begun as an innocuous case of bronchitis and had morphed into full blown pneumonia which she had never been able to recover from. 

‘Maybe we should move up the date’ Hope said, out of the blue.

Even without proper context, Cam knew exactly what she was talking about.

‘You know… so my grandma can be there’ Hope added, her voice strained.

Cameron squeezed her hand and glanced over in her direction. ‘We could but… you know, my dad needs a heads up, at least a few weeks before he can get someone to cover for him’ he reminded her.

She nodded and sighed; setting a date for their upcoming nuptials had proven more complicated than she’d first imagined and the couple had given it a great deal of thought. They’d decided on a spring wedding and out of respect for the Armstrong family’s strong religious beliefs, Hope had happily agreed to a church ceremony. Most of their friends and family were in New York and if they wanted the Armstrong clan to attend, they needed to do it at a time when Fred Armstrong could get away from the demanding business of running the family farm. Finding a nearby parish hadn’t been an easy task either, considering neither one of them were practicing Catholics but Cameron had been baptized so all that was left was to get special dispensation for Hope, a non-Catholic, to marry in the church.

‘I know…’ she sighed, returning to silence. ‘It’s just that… well, I don't think she’s going to hang on much longer’ she said with regret. 

‘Babe…’ he finally replied, ‘I doubt she’d be well enough to come even if it was next week.’

‘You’re right’ Hope said, shaking her head. ‘I’m being silly. May 22nd is the perfect date.’

Cameron nodded and smiled at her. ‘We’re getting married, babe!’ he said, his grin widening in an attempt to change the mood.

It worked and Hope smiled back at him, momentarily forgetting her woes. ‘We are! Now, if we can just figure out when to tell our folks… I thought I was going to have to blurt it out this morning when Aunt Elizabeth started her little inquisition.’

‘Well, I think we should stick to the plan. They can all hear about it at the same time, otherwise we’ll have a mutiny on our hands. It’s bad enough that my folks feel a little left out with us living here.’

Hope’s face brightened. ‘Do you think your folks will be surprised?’

‘Are you kidding? My mom asks me about a wedding date every single time I talk to her’ Cameron chuckled. ‘She’ll be so excited.’

Hope leaned it and placed a kiss on her fiancé’s cheek as he grinned back at her. ‘What?’

‘I don’t know… it’s kind of nice to have this secret just between us for a little while longer.’

WCWCWC

As with Liam before them, the Caffreys were greeted by a tail-wagging dog and a lot of clanging of pots and pans when they finally made it home. Someone was hard at work and considering Liam’s lack of interest in the culinary arts, it was a pretty sure bet that their foster daughter was busy in the kitchen, probably trying to make amends.

Neal and Sara exchanged glances and she gave her husband a head nod in the direction of the stairs; she knew he was eager to have a chat with their son and clear the air.

‘Go on, go talk to him. I’ll check on Caitlin’ Sara said as she patted her husband on the bum and sent him on his way. 

Neal nodded and was already halfway up the stairs by the time Sara stepped into the kitchen to find her foster daughter toiling away by the stove.

‘Whoa! What’s going on in here?’ she asked as she slowed just long enough to dip her finger in a bowl of chocolate icing.

‘Mmmm’ she moaned, licking her finger and taking a seat at the table.

‘I thought I’d make dinner for everybody’ Caitlin replied, her back to her foster mom as she kept working.

‘Looks like you’ve made enough to feed us for the week’ Sara commented.

Caitlin looked up from where she’d been working and Sara saw the corners of her mouth turn up as she began to relax.

Sara patted the chair next to her. ‘Why don’t you leave that for a minute and come sit here?’ she suggested.

‘But…’ Caitlin replied, pointing to the pots on the stove.

‘Come on’ Sara insisted.

Caitlin turned down the burners on the stove and walked over, eyes downcast as she took a seat across from her foster mom, not quite sure what to expect; with Sara, it could just as well be a stern talking to as a warm, affectionate hug.

‘How’s Grandma doing?’ Caitlin asked softly, hoping to steer the conversation away from the events of the previous night.

‘She’s about the same’ Sara replied sadly. ‘Still not well enough to get out of bed.’

‘Did you tell her? About what I did?’

‘No’ Sara replied quietly. ‘I just told her you would drop by to see her after your shift tomorrow.’

Caitlin nodded and sniffled, avoiding Sara’s gaze. ‘Thanks. I’m sorry… about last night.’

‘Have you apologized to Neal and Liam? They’re the ones who had to drag your sorry ass home.’

Caitlin nodded and looked down, twiddling her fingers, a sure sign of unease. 

Sara brought her hand to the young woman’s chin, forcing her to look up at her. ‘I know it’s not easy, watching someone you love slip away. But you’re not alone, we all love Grandma.’

The words seemed to hit Caitlin like an arrow straight through the heart and she began to cry, tears pouring down her face. Sara’s heart melted at the sight; this kid had already been through so much and she wasn't even twenty years old yet. 

‘Oh, honey, I know you’ve had a lot of people walk out on you’ Sara said, reaching out to take her foster daughter’s hand. 

The young woman shrugged and sniffled and Sara got up and went to the kitchen counter to fetch a box of tissues, placing it on the table before her.

‘I wasn't expecting to… to care about her the way I do’ Caitlin admitted as she blew her nose noisily.

Sara shook her head and chuckled at the unexpected sound, taking the seat next to Caitlin, her arm wrapping protectively around the younger woman’s shoulder. ‘We don’t control our feelings.’

‘She’s just… she gets me, Sara. She understands me even when I’m confused. She never judges me or makes me feel… inadequate.’

Sara’s face tightened in response to the comment.

‘Not that you and Mr. C make me feel inadequate’ Caitlin hastened to add. ‘It’s just that you’re… you’re like my parents and… it’s not the same.’

‘I understand’ Sara replied soberly with a nod.

‘Sara…’ Caitlin said, her voice growing serious. ‘She’s not going to be around much longer, is she?’ 

‘Probably not, honey’ Sara replied kindly. ‘But we don’t control that either… nobody does.’

Caitlin’s face grew sombre. ‘Do you think we’ll know ahead of time when it happens?’

‘Sometimes, when a person gets to be Grandma’s age, you can see it coming. But not always. The centre will call us if they think… if they think she’s slipping away.’

Caitlin began to sob softly and Sara’s arms moved to envelop her as Caitlin let herself melt in her surrogate mother’s embrace. 

‘Oh, sweetie’ Sara murmured, running her hand through the young woman’s mane of blond hair. ‘I know this is hard on you. It’s hard on all of us.’

Caitlin rested her head on Sara’s shoulder, letting herself be comforted. After a moment, she looked up, regaining some control over her emotions.

‘How did you… when your parents died, how did you get through it?’

Sara scoffed as the memories from that horrible period of her life came flooding back. She’d been away at university when the call had come, a call that had changed her life forever.

‘To be honest, I don’t know’ she admitted. ‘At first, I was numb… it had been so sudden. After we buried them… I just threw myself into finishing my degree and getting a job. For the longest time, I closed myself off to any emotion, I just locked everything up so I would never hurt that much again… I was on my own, mostly. But, Caitlin, you’re not alone, you’ve got me and Neal and Hope and Liam. We care about you and if you let this… or anything else destroy the essence of who you are…’

Caitlin nodded, wiping her eyes. 

‘But acting out like you’ve been doing’ Sara continued, ‘I can tell you for sure that’s not the answer. I know it hurts but if we all pull together, we can get through this.’

‘I know… I’m sorry. I just can’t seem to help myself’ the young woman moaned.

‘You can… if you don’t keep it bottled up inside. Will you promise me you’ll try?’

WCWCWC

The knock on his bedroom door was so soft that, at first, Liam wasn't even sure he’d actually heard it. It was followed by a second, louder attempt and the sound of his father’s voice.

‘Liam? Can I come in?’

Liam sat up from where he’d been lounging on the bed and slammed his laptop shut, shuffling to lean up against the headboard. 

‘Sure, come on in Dad’ he called out, bracing himself for what was coming next.

The door opened and Neal stepped in, looking around to make sure he wasn't interrupting and he made his way to sit on the edge of the bed at his son’s feet. 

‘Dinner’s almost ready’ he announced. ‘Another ten, fifteen minutes.’

Liam nodded but didn't look directly at his dad; he was embarrassed about his earlier behaviour and he wasn't sure what to expect; after all, he deserved a good talking to for the way he’d spoken to both his dad and to Caitlin. 

‘About earlier…’ Neal began, his voice quiet.

‘I know, I know… I’m sorry about what I said to Caitlin. I… I guess I kind of lost control.’

‘I’m not the one you should be apologizing to’ Neal reminded him, his voice quiet.

Liam finally looked up, seeing the concern in his father’s eyes. ‘I already apologized to her… when I got back’ he said.

‘I’m not used to seeing you lose it like that, buddy’ Neal admitted. ‘I was… worried.’

He waited a moment in the hopes that Liam would come clean about what was really on his mind and in answer to the silence, he continued.

‘You want to tell me what’s really going? Why you reacted that way?’

There was silence in the room as Liam debated whether or not to share his fears with his dad. He shrugged and looked away, embarrassed to admit that he worried about his dad’s past coming back to haunt him. 

‘Dad, I… I worry about you’ he finally said.

‘About me?’ Neal replied, puzzled.

‘Yeah… when that whole thing with Hope happened —’

Neal sighed, his breath shaky. ‘I’m never going to get you to trust me again, am I?’ he said, hurt and sadness apparent in his voice.

‘Dad, it’s not about that. I’m… I’m so proud of you for getting better. I know how hard that was. And I know you did it for us, for me and Hope and Mom… and Caitlin.’

Neal waited for him to continue. 

‘I’m proud of you, Dad’ Liam repeated, his voice trembling. ‘But I…well, I did a lot of reading about…’

He hesitated, unsure about the proper terminology; he certainly didn't want to say anything that was offensive or derogatory. 

‘About alcohol abuse?’ Neal offered. ‘It’s okay, buddy, you can say it. I abused alcohol and I was addicted.’

‘But you beat it, Dad. And it was… hard. It was hard for you and it was… it was hard on all of us. I just get scared that, with everything that’s going on, with Caitlin acting out and with Grandma being sick… What if you give in and start drinking again?’

Neal brought his hand to rest on Liam’s back. 

‘I’m not going to lie to you, Liam. It’s not always easy to resist and… sometimes, the thought of having a drink crosses my mind. But I don’t want you to worry, okay? I’m not going to give in. I’ve got your mom to talk to and I can go back and see Marion Birch any time I need to and I can always make an appointment to see James… and there are meetings I can go to and people I can talk to.’

Liam let out a shaky breath as he stared into his dad’s eyes.

‘I’ve got resources this time and I’m never going back to that horrible, horrible place, do you hear me?’

Liam nodded and swallowed; embarrassed at having brought up the delicate subject.

‘Dad, I don’t want you to think that I see you as weak because I don’t. I think what you did, kicking that horrible addiction and getting yourself out of that mess… well, it was amazing.’

Neal smiled. ‘I did it for you kids and for your mom’ he admitted. ‘And I’m so lucky I was given a second chance. I’m not going to blow it.’

‘I’m sorry if you worry about me’ Neal added. ‘Please don’t, okay? I’m fine.’

Liam nodded and reached out to hug his dad, the two men breathing heavily with emotion. After a moment, they pulled away and Liam sniffled a little, reaching for a tissue by the bedside and wiping his nose.

‘There’s one more thing…’ Neal began as he sat back on his heels. 

He paused for a moment, looking into his son’s eyes. ‘What you said when you stormed out of the garage… well, I’m sorry if you get the impression that I’m always siding with Caitlin.’

Liam waited for a moment for his dad to continue.

‘Because I’m really not’ Neal added.

Liam cleared his throat. ‘It… just feels like that, sometimes. Like the more she misbehaves, the more attention she gets.’

Neal nodded in understanding; there was some truth to what his son had just said.

‘You’re right. When one of you kids acts out, it’s… well, it’s a sign to me and your mom that something’s up with you so we… pay extra attention.’ 

Liam rolled his eyes; wasn't that the truth. Caitlin had all their attention.

‘When Hope got hurt…’ Neal reminded him. ‘It seemed like everything we did, the only thing we ever talked about for months was Hope… what we could do to help her, how we could make it better. And when you were diagnosed with diabetes, your mom hovered over you constantly…’ 

Liam chuckled softly, recalling how his mom had followed him around everywhere, taking his blood sugar levels constantly and nagging him about what and when he ate.

‘And then, when we started to suspect you were gay, Mom was worried about why you weren't confiding in us and she kept leaving all that stuff lying around for you to read. Remember that?’

This time, Liam laughed out loud. His mom had been about as subtle as a freight train in her efforts to get him to open up.

‘That’s all we ever talked about for weeks. And then, when you and Cody had all that trouble at school, we were terrified you were going to get hurt. You know, your mom and I still worry about you… your safety on the university campus.’ 

Liam frowned and shook his head. ‘It’s okay Dad, really.’

‘Well, you’re a man now and we still worry about you. We worry about all three of you and I suspect we always will. But I know you’re smart, you have a good head on your shoulders and that if you need us, you’ll ask for help.’

‘I will’ Liam reassured him. 

‘Now it’s Caitlin’s turn, she’s going through a rough time and she needs our support. She’s terrified she’s gonna lose Grandma and that’s why she’s acting out. Almost everybody in her life has abandoned her at some point and now, she’s losing someone else who’s important to her.’

‘But —’

‘It doesn't mean there won’t be any consequences for her behaviour’ Neal interrupted. ‘It just means we have to be a little more patient with her. Do you think you can do that?’

Liam nodded and smiled. ‘Yeah…’

‘Neal!’ Sara’s voice was heard, calling from downstairs. ‘Can you tell Liam dinner’s ready?’

Neal ruffled his son’s hair, something his son usually found annoying but this time Liam just laughed and gave his dad a playful shove in response.

‘We’ll be right down!’ Neal called back.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

The start of a new year… for some, it held the promise of a new beginning, a chance to start something brand new, to begin again. For others, it carried the potential for change, a shot at self-improvement, progress, growth. And still for others, it meant the end of the line, the moment to finally let go, either by choice or through the force of events.

For Hope Ellis-Caffrey, the new year presaged nothing but joy as she prepared to wed the man of her dreams. She would finally be turning the page on a very painful few years following the tragic accident which had literally hijacked her life. Since that fateful evening four years earlier, Hope had endured five long months in hospital, eight painful surgeries and endless sessions of physical and speech therapy - all in an attempt to put right what had gone so horribly wrong the night a drunk driver had seen fit to plough into her and send her crashing onto the cold, hard pavement. Sadly, the sound of screeching tires and a slippery patch of ice on a quiet street had thwarted her long cherished dream of attending Carnegie Mellon University and obtaining a degree in visual arts. These days, her life revolved around teaching art classes at her dad’s school as well as at the Raphael Gallery in Manhattan - not that she didn't enjoy teaching, she did and she had a real knack for it but the dream of studying art was still very much alive in the young woman’s heart. 

Her upcoming surgery, the last in a long string of operations, was purely aesthetic in nature and she could not wait to finally have it behind her. The damage which had been done to her body that night had included numerous fractures, a head trauma which had impacted her speech as well as facial injuries which had required countless bone and skin grafts. All that was left was one last procedure to tighten up the skin above her eyelids to keep them from drooping and a final tuck that would return her face to its original state - or as close to it as was humanly possible. 

Hope turned over in bed and thought of the day ahead. Now that she spent pretty well every weekend in Flushing, she was finding it more difficult to be separated from Cam during the week. Most days though, she loved being home - spending time with her dad down in their basement studio and traveling to and from the school with him on the days she was scheduled to teach. With Liam home for the holidays, it was like old school week and she was enjoying her time with her baby brother as they reverted to the friendly teasing and heart to heart talks that had always defined their relationship. 

Overall, it was a good life… just not the one she’d been planning on before the accident. A smile crossed her lips at the thought that, by spring, she and Cameron would be married and, if everything went according to plan, they’d be living in a brand new place, starting out on their new life together. 

She could hardly wait.

WCWCWC

Neal lay on his back, arm behind his head, staring at the stark ceiling. His mind was in overdrive as he thought ahead to the next twenty-four hours. They’d be hosting a houseful of guests before the day was over and if that wasn't enough, he needed to make sure they had everything ready for New Year’s Day brunch with his mom the next day. As always, he'd bitten off more than he could chew - but then again… wasn't that the story of his life?

Most of the food was ready to roll but there were still a few odds and ends to see to as well as a couple of errands to run - maybe he could enlist Liam or Caitlin’s help with that last minute run to the bakery for the baguettes he wanted for that brie and cranberry recipe he’d gotten off Elizabeth. 

Then, there was that one last walk through the house with the Hoover to vacuum up the dog hair that perpetually accumulated in the corners - something that had to be done practically on a daily basis. Finally, he wanted to make sure the bar was fully stocked and that the table was set in the dining room where most of the food would be laid out - Sara with her discerning eye and impeccable taste was always good with that. The house itself was still festively decorated, the tree in the living room brightly lit and the outside of the house fully decked out for the annual decorating contest - Neal’s pride and joy. He made a mental note to add water to the Christmas tree; it had been up since the first week of December and he’d noticed it had begun to shed its needles. 

He was a details guy, always had been, and sometimes he wished he could let go of some of the nuts and bolts and relax a little more. That high blood pressure diagnosis nagged at him - seemingly, it was the price to pay for being a perfectionist. 

Sara turned in bed, her arm landing squarely on his chest as she curled up against him, still blissfully asleep. He brought his arm to rest around her shoulder, anchoring her in place and deposited a gentle kiss on her forehead, feeling her hair tickle his nose. Hearing her sigh in her sleep, he returned to the mental preparation for the New Year’s Eve party. As was his habit, he had invited way too many people, the list growing daily to include neighbours, friends, colleagues from both the art school and the gallery, from Sterling Bosch as well as the usual suspects: the Burkes, the Masons, the Jordans, the Millers. Hope and Cam would be there and he hoped Liam and Caitlin would put in an appearance although they probably had their own New Year’s Eve parties to go to. 

Despite all the planning and work involved in hosting, Neal loved entertaining especially during the holidays. He enjoyed every aspect of having people over - from the food preparation to welcoming the guests to keeping everybody happy, fed and hydrated. He was a natural and Sara, bless her soul, was always happy to let him take the lead, playing her role as sidekick to perfection. He glanced down at her, lying in his arms, her raven hair covering her face, her jaw relaxed as the tiniest bit of drool slipped out of the corner of her mouth and onto his bare chest. He chuckled at the familiar sight and kissed her once more, this time rousing her from her sleep.

‘What time is it?’ she asked, her voice thick with sleep.

‘Time to think about getting up so we can get started on the preparations for the big party’ he replied with a gentle squeeze of her shoulder. ‘Did you remember to pick up the wine?’

‘Yes, Martha, I picked up the wine’ she replied dutifully, still half asleep. ‘And the party favours and those special napkins you wanted… oh, and the fresh mint you asked for.’

She stretched like a cat waking from its nap and returned her head to rest on that warm spot on Neal’s chest where she’d been resting, enjoying the familiar feel of his solid body against hers. Her hands began to roam up and down his chest, lazily at first then more purposefully as her breathing began to intensify and grow louder. She became aware of that familiar tingling deep in her belly and she gave in to it, letting her hand linger up to tease Neal’s nipple with the tip of her finger, delighting in the groan resonating from his chest as she squeezed it playfully. 

‘Mmmm’ she heard him moan and she smiled, satisfied with the all too predictable reaction she was getting to her little manoeuvre, her not so secret weapon. 

To her disappointment, Neal’s hand was instantly on hers, gently nudging it away. ‘No time for hanky panky, babe’ he said with a tinge of regret. ‘We’ve got too much to do to get ready. In a few hours, we’ll have a houseful of guests.’

‘What?’ Sara replied with a pout as she propped herself up on her elbow to get a good look at his eyes. ‘What are you talking about? But we always do it on New Year’s Eve.’

He grinned, shaking his head in amusement at his wife’s reaction to his gentle rebuff. Strictly speaking she was right; lovemaking to end one year and start the next had been a ritual of theirs over the years - a pleasant way to remind each other that no matter what had transpired over the past twelve months, whatever disagreements or silly spats had occurred between them, they needed to be left behind as they looked forward to the new year with a clean slate. 

‘Maybe tonight…’ he suggested, mimicking her pout. ‘After everybody’s gone home.’

‘No, no, not tonight! Sara whined, sounding like a petulant child. 

She lifted her leg and threw it across his body in an attempt to keep him pinned to the bed although she knew all too well that if he wanted to, he could easily push her off - no effort required. Better to revert to another one of her feminine wiles, she thought, as she brought her mouth to his ear, whispering provocatively.

‘Come on, Caffrey’ she murmured suggestively, rubbing up against him insistently. ‘The house is quiet, the kids are still asleep… I’m willing and raring to go.’

By way of encouragement, she let her hand slip down past the edge of his sleep pants, cupping his junk through the silky material and noticing the beginnings of early morning arousal. As a rule, Neal didn't require much coaxing when it came to morning sex but she could see from the hesitation in his eyes that she was going to have to work a little harder for this one.

‘Mmmm’ she murmured lewdly as she squeezed gently. ‘Looks like I’m not the only one who’s revved up and ready for action.’

Neal lay there, enjoying the moment, tempted to give in and Sara kept working at it, adamant to get her way, whatever it took. She let her lips slip from his ear down to his neck, leaving a trail of wet kisses behind and feeling him wriggle beneath her as he tried in vain to resist. Her mouth returned to the nipple she’d been tugging at and she ran her tongue across it, biting it softly as Neal groaned and squirmed beneath her. The sensation sent a jolt of desire through his body as he felt her rubbing up against him in and he bucked up against her, despite himself. 

‘You’re not going to give up, are you?’ he said, his eyes sparkling.

Her hands resumed roaming, across his chest, her mouth moving back up to his ear and nipping at it playfully as she spoke. 

‘You’re going to jinx a whole year of our lives if you don't give in’ she threatened as she moved back down to his other nipple, giving it the same treatment as the first and feeling Neal start to thaw in response to her insistent touch. 

Her hands wandered down from his chest and slipped inside his sleep pants this time, gently squeezing and feeling him react in response to her ministrations. Her lips were doing a fair bit of roaming as well, not staying in any one spot for more than a few seconds and Neal decided enough was enough. He gave in to the multiple sensations, grabbing her face with both of his hands and bringing her mouth to his in a long, drawn out kiss.

‘A whole year, huh?’ he murmured playfully, his voice rough. ‘We can’t have that now, can we?’ 

In a move reminiscent of his younger days, Neal grabbed Sara by the arms and flipped her onto her back in one quick motion, his body instantly covering hers and his hands reaching under her t-shirt to cop a feel as Sara chuckled in reaction to the surprise move.  
‘That’s more like it’ she whispered, tugging at his sleep pants. ‘I see you’ve still got the moves there, old man.’

‘Old man?’ he murmured, his lips moving to capture her breast and sucking on her nipple hungrily. ‘I’ll show you old man…’

There was the sound of a door opening off in the distance and footsteps outside their bedroom door and the two of them froze, staring at each other with their mouths hanging open. A few seconds later, the sound of a flushing toilet was heard followed by more footsteps and a bedroom door closing - probably Caitlin, from the number of steps.

The two of them chuckled softly and Neal gave his wife a naughty eyebrow wag.

‘Shhh… be quiet’ he whispered as he moved in to devour her mouth. 

WCWCWC

Across the hall, Liam Caffrey lay in bed, his mind wandering to thoughts of Todd Greenway’s muscled body, his tight little bubble ass, his firm, bulging biceps. He closed his eyes and let his hand slide down his body, taking himself in hand and moaning as he imagined pinning the young man up against the door in his dorm, his hands moving down to cup his ass, squeezing as he pressed up against him. Todd was an enthusiastic lover, noisy as all hell but the truth was, Liam liked that about him and even though he was always on Todd’s case about keeping the noise to a minimum in their busy dorm, he secretly enjoyed the moans and groans that slipped from the young man’s parted lips as they made out.

Liam Caffrey’s sexual history was a rather brief one. Just shy of his nineteenth birthday, Todd was only the second guy he’d ever been with and he was still learning to fully embrace the physical manifestations of his sexuality - freely and openly. With Cody, everything had been new and exciting and it had taken years for the two of them to work up to fully expressing their feelings and trusting their bodies enough to let them dictate their actions. What had begun as kissing and petting had gradually evolved to include more elaborate expressions of their feelings - but everything had happened naturally, over time and their physical relationship had always been an expression of the sweet, abiding love they had for one another. Throughout their high school years, they had learned the ropes of gay sex together, exploring as they went and even towards the end, their relationship had managed to maintain a sense of virtuous innocence. 

With Todd, things had been completely different. To say their relationship was purely physical wasn't much of an exaggeration; they’d skipped the preliminaries and jumped into bed on their second date. The new man in Liam’s life had much more experience than young Caffrey and he’d initiated some pretty innovative moves between the sheets, something Liam was grateful for as he learned to embrace his sensuous urges and continued to explore his sexuality. 

Liam moaned as he imagined the young man writhing beneath him, the feel of his muscled arms around him, the sound of his….

Whoa! Whoa! Whoa! Liam’s eyes flew open and his hand fell away as the face of Cody Miller appeared behind his closed eyelids and his ex’s name slipped from his lips, unbidden. It wasn't the first time thoughts of Cody Miller had intruded on his fantasies about his new boyfriend. The first few times he'd been with Todd, he'd had to fight the image of Cody looking down at him, even murmuring his name in the throws of passion - to Todd’s dismay. Now that he was home again, it seemed his ex was constantly on his mind; no doubt a by-product of having him nearby. 

He sat up, the urge to choke the chicken suddenly fading and he let his legs dangle off the edge of the bed as he ran his hands through his thick dark blonde head of hair. He forced himself to see Todd’s face in his mind’s eye but Cody’s deep set eyes and warm smile stared back at him, despite his efforts. 

He got to his feet and walked over to the mirror, studying himself standing there in his boxers, his hair disheveled and his eyes bleary. From the corner of his eye, he could see the reflection of Cody’s portrait hanging on the wall behind him; the one his dad had painted for him way back when the two young men had first started dating. He turned to better examine the painting, his eyes drawn to the warm, smouldering eyes that seemed to peer deep into his soul. 

Maybe this thing with Todd wasn't meant to be; sure, it was fun to explore and no one could deny that fully embracing your sexuality at your sexual peak was a liberating experience. But sex without deep, enduring feelings somehow felt empty and bereft of meaning and more than once, he'd felt cheap and sleazy after leaving Todd’s side.

Breaking up with Cody had been the most difficult thing he'd ever done. The decision had been arrived at mutually, based on the realization that living in different cities wasn't conducive to a long term relationship and might keep them from reaching their full potentials and their individual goals. Neither one of them was ready to give up on the relationship for good, but they were both ambitious young men with a future to build and it was impractical to keep dating with Cody in New York and Liam upstate on a basketball scholarship and his eye on a business degree. 

Their estrangement was turning out to be a lot more difficult than Liam had imagined and he couldn’t help but wonder how Cody was coping with their break up.

He thought again about Will’s invitation to his New Year’s Eve party. Cody travelled in the same social circles and would be there, for sure. What if he showed up with a date? And why wouldn't he? Liam had certainly not wasted any time moving on and hooking up with another guy, why should it be any different for Cody? The thought of coming face to face with his ex on somebody else’s arm was just too much and he shook his head and pulled away from the mirror, opening the door to his room and stepping out into the hallway. He ignored the soft giggling coming from his parents’ bedroom and rolled his eyes — it wasn't the first time and it certainly wouldn't be the last — and he walked straight into the bathroom and into a warm, soothing shower. 

WCWCWC

‘Liam, can you go get the case of tonic water out of the garage for me?’ Neal called out over his shoulder as he busied himself with finishing up a plate of appetizers.

‘Oh, and Caitlin, can you put that on the table?’ he pointed as the young woman walked by.

‘Sure thing’ she replied with a smile, disappearing into the dining room with a plateful of mini quiches.

Sara observed from nearby and set aside the stack of napkins she was folding - in exactly the way she’d been instructed to fold them by the head honcho. She moved to his side and placed her hand reassuringly on his back. 

‘Relax, Neal. Everything’s going to be fine. Everything looks great!’

He ignored her and returned to the fridge, poking around for something and letting out a loud sigh of frustration. 

‘Where’s the cream cheese?’ he called out impatiently, his voice much too shrill for someone who was just looking for a package of cream cheese.

Sara leaned in and opened the drawer, pulling out a package of cheese and handing it to him without a word. He gave her a look of mild annoyance and returned to the task at hand. 

‘Did you take your meds?’ she couldn't help but ask after a moment of tense silence.

‘Yes’ he mumbled, not even bothering to look up.

Sara finally put down the napkin she’d been working on and walked over to where he stood, slipping in between Neal and the kitchen counter, forcing him to take notice of her.

‘All right, that’s enough. Look at me’ she demanded, her hands on both his arms. He complied; her tone of voice meant business.

‘We are having our friends over for a party. No one’s going to care if the quiches have ham or broccoli or… how many of those little chicken thingies are on the plate’ she stated, waving her hand towards the plate of hors d’oeuvres he’d been fussing with. 

‘Chicken and spinach puffs’ he replied, his face serious.

‘What?’

‘Chicken and spinach puffs, that’s what they’re called’ he said, deadpan. ‘Not chicken thingies.’

Sara gave him a good natured slap on the arm and they both smiled, Neal finally relaxing as he realized he might be overreacting after all.

‘I guess I’m feeling a little tense’ he admitted.

‘You think?’ she asked rhetorically.

The front door opened in the distance, followed by Hope’s voice. ‘It’s just us!’ 

‘See?’ Sara said with a quick swipe to Neal’s butt. ‘Reinforcements are here.’

WCWCWC

Liam sat outside the Allenby home, observing from a distance as a few stray guests were let in and trying to work up the nerve to follow. He sat in the car, his hand still resting on the key in the ignition, debating whether he wouldn't be better off to just take off and go back home. He’d seen a number of his friends enter the house while he lurked nearby, like some thief waiting for the right time to break in or to cut his losses and run off with his tail between his legs. Still no sign of Cody but for all he knew, his ex could already be inside, dancing with his gorgeous new boyfriend and having the time of his life.

He sighed loudly and let out a gasp, almost jumping out of his skin when he heard a sudden rap on the car window.

‘Caffrey!’ he heard the muffled voice say through the glass.

‘Jake!’ Liam replied as he rolled down the window to find his friend Jake Winston standing there next to his girlfriend, Renée. 

‘I thought that was you. What the hell are you doing out here, lurking around, it’s freezing.’

Liam took the key out of the ignition and opened the car door, stepping out into the cold air. 

‘Oh…’ he said hesitantly. ‘I was just… I was just about to go in.’

‘You look great, man’ Jake said, his arms around Liam in a giant bear hug. ‘How’s it going?’

‘Good, good’ Liam said as he followed the young couple towards the house. Whether he was ready or not, it looked like he was going in and who knew what he’d find inside.

‘You liking school?’ the young woman asked as they approached the front door.

‘Yeah, it’s great’ Liam replied with all the fake enthusiasm he could muster.

‘I’ve been watching your games, dude. Solid!’ Jake enthused as they arrived and gave a cursory knock on the door before entering.

Music played loudly and there were familiar faces everywhere, many friends Liam hadn't seen since he’d left the previous summer. Before long, a small group had assembled around him, happy to have him back in their midst - the prodigal son returning and all that.

‘Here’ Will said, appearing with a couple of beers in his hands and offering one to Liam. ‘As promised, a cold Stella. Just for you.’

‘Thanks man’ Liam said as he took the bottle from his best friend’s hand and began to look around surreptitiously.

It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out what he was looking for. Will leaned in to speak in his ear, his voice clear despite the loud music. ‘He’s here… and before you ask, he’s alone and he’s been asking about you.’

Liam felt his heart skip a beat. He took a slug of beer and swallowed, trying to keep his cool. The truth was his heart was pounding in his ears and he could feel his cheeks reddening at the thought of seeing Cody again after being apart for all those months. What do you say to your ex when you come face to face in a crowded room, your heart stuck in your throat.

Luckily, he didn't have very long to consider the question. He felt a hand on his shoulder and he turned to find those oh so familiar eyes staring back at him, and that smile, the one that could melt his heart.

‘Liam…’ Cody Miller said as he opened up his arms to him.

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

Peter stood in front of the full length mirror, staring down at the striped tie in his hand. 

‘El!’ he called out with nothing but deafening silence in response.

He could hear water running in the bathroom and he gave up, throwing the tie down on the bed and adjusting his shirt collar as he stared back at his reflection.

He looked pretty damn good for his age. His posture was great, the grey in his hair still hadn't fully won the battle and his eyes still sparkled - a sure sign there was plenty of life left in the old goat.

If everything went according to plan - well, Elizabeth’s plan, anyway - this would be a big year for the Burkes, the year where the two of them finally left the daily grind behind for good and started enjoying the life of leisure so many worked decades to attain. 

So, why was he feeling so torn?

Working in an art gallery had never been on his radar. Sure, he’d always appreciated art, its aesthetic beauty and its pecuniary value but he was never what one might call an art lover. Not like his partner, anyway. Neal had the love of art running through his veins, he breathed it, he lived it. For Peter, it was much more of a cerebral thing and yet, it had grown to take up an awful lot of room in his life - and the truth was, he wasn't hating it. 

For young Peter Burke, growing up in semi-rural upstate New York, the dream had always been law enforcement - that or becoming a secret spy. He had nothing but wonderful memories of his uncle Gus, a state trooper who’d always looked like he had things well in hand. He was a compassionate man yet he commanded respect and as a little boy, Peter would look up to him with stars in his eyes, hoping someday to follow in his footsteps. Working with the Bureau had lived up to all his expectations - and more. But towards the end, Peter had to admit that the paper shuffling which had occupied most of his days just didn't hold the same appeal as those exciting cases he’d worked back in the day, especially those he’d shared with Neal, his wayward confidential informant. Working alongside his best friend, be it at the Bureau or at the gallery, left him energized and the prospect of doing crossword puzzles and carrying out endless home repairs paled in comparison, leaving him feeling ambivalent and unsure about the future.

Elizabeth’s voice brought him out of his reverie. ‘Oh, honey, don’t wear a tie’ she exclaimed as she breezed into the room looking perfectly lovely in a knee-length little black dress and strappy shoes. 

‘What?’ Peter replied with a frown.

‘And why aren't you wearing the shirt I put out for you?’ she asked, pointing to a dark blue shirt lying on the bed.

‘I like this one’ Peter replied with a frown, running his hand over the front of the pale green shirt he’d taken out of the closet. ‘It’s… Christmas-y.’

‘Well, Christmas is over so… hurry up and change, I’ll wait for you downstairs’ she called out as she stepped out of the room with a bounce in her step.

Peter looked at El’s choice on the bed and pouted; when had his wife become the definitive authority when it came to what he did or didn't wear?

He shook his head as he realized she’d always dictated his wardrobe and, letting out a loud sigh of resignation, he began to unbutton his shirt.

WCWCWC

Caitlin set down the plate of food on the dining room table and glanced down at her buzzing phone, frowning. Without hesitation, she punched in a short response and slipped the phone back into her jeans pocket before returning to the kitchen. She could hear Neal and Sara arguing in there with Hope weighing in from time to time and she forced herself to zero in on the conversation - something about where they should set up the bar.

Sara looked up to address her foster daughter as she appeared around the corner. ‘All right, why don’t we let Caitlin cast the deciding vote’ she declared authoritatively.

‘Do you think we should set up the bar here, on the kitchen island where it’s easily accessible for everyone —’ she began as Cam nodded enthusiastically.

‘Or over there in the family room away from all the food preparation’ Neal pointed, interrupting his wife as Hope and Cam leaned in to hear Caitlin’s opinion on what seemed to be a matter of capital importance. 

It was obviously a trick question - one that couldn't be answered without ruffling some feathers. It was further obvious that Cam was siding with Sara while Hope was in agreement with her dad. Whatever she opined, Caitlin would be contradicting half the group - not a great position to be in.

She sighed loudly, looking around the room, taking her time responding. ‘How about the sideboard in the dining room?’ she suggested with a shrug. ‘That’s where all the food is going to be and isn't that where most of the guests are going to be hanging out?’

‘The sideboard in the dining room….’ Sara repeated, her eyes narrowing. ‘I suppose that could work.’

Neal waited a beat, reflecting carefully on Caitlin’s proposition. ‘Yeah, yeah… that might work’ he agreed, scooping up a few of the wine bottles which littered the kitchen counter and heading out to the dining room.

Caitlin smiled, relieved. Apparently, she’d dodged a bullet and she was pleased she’d been instrumental in averting a major family crisis. She reached inside the kitchen cupboard, grabbing some wine glasses from the cabinet and starting out, in pursuit of Neal and Sara who were leading the way, arms laden with bottles.

‘What just happened?’ Hope asked Cam as they stood alone in the kitchen.

‘I think Caitlin just avoided a major blowup between your mom and dad’ he whispered with a grin.

‘You know, if you want to go out tonight… with your friends’ Hope heard her mom say from a few feet away. ‘I’m not sure you’re going to enjoy hanging out with a bunch of old fogeys.’

Sara could sense Neal tensing up; the last thing he wanted to add to his very busy schedule was another trek to some god forsaken suburb to bring Caitlin home after a wild night of partying.

‘That’s okay’ Caitlin said soberly. ‘I thought I’d hang out here. I want to put the finishing touches on my present for Grandma.’

Neal’s eyebrows shot up and he gave his wife a surreptitious glance; pleasantly surprised by her response. Well, that was one less thing to worry about. 

WCWCWC

Liam’s eyes grew bright at the sight of his ex-boyfriend, something that was not lost on Will Allenby who stood next to the two men, watching their interaction with interest. Liam took one step forward, walking straight into the open arms of the man he’d been dreaming of pretty well non-stop since he’d gotten back to New York. He felt himself melt in Cody’s warm embrace, so familiar yet foreign, considering the very unique circumstances of their impromptu reunion. Time stood still as the men hugged, the loud music fading into the background and suddenly, it felt like they were the only two people in the room. Their bodies fit together perfectly as they always had and they seemed to find each other, exactly where they’d left off months earlier. Liam felt his whole body start to relax as he stood there enjoying the feel of Cody’s arms around him, his sturdy body pressed up against his, the familiar scent of the other man’s aftershave and the intimate feel of his stubbly beard rubbing up against his cheek. 

He became keenly aware that he’d been lingering in Cody’s embrace just a little too long - a fact that brought on a wave of unexpected sadness. After a few seconds, he cleared his throat, finally loosening his grip and he stepped back, his eyes returning to Cody’s amazing smile, that dimple in his chin that always left him weak kneed. Truth was, if he’d listened to his heart instead of his head, he would have remained in those arms forever. 

‘You look amazing’ Cody said, slightly breathless. ‘You been working out?’

Liam shrugged, still lingering in the afterglow of their little clinch. ‘Aww, you know, the coach really puts us through our paces.’

‘Yeah?’ Cody replied with a wide grin. ‘I’ve been watching some of your games, you look like you’re doing really great…. I mean the team is… doing really great’ he added nervously, his voice trailing.

At this, Liam couldn't help but smile. Cody Miller had very little interest in sports, never had, although he’d made the effort of going to all of Liam’s games back when they were in high school. Cody never really got the point of watching a bunch of guys run up and down a basketball court in a foul-smelling gym and yet, he’d never complained, showing up at every practice and game to cheer his boyfriend on. 

‘You’ve been watching my games?’ Liam replied, pleasantly surprised at the other man’s off-hand comment.

Cody seemed embarrassed and he shrugged. ‘You know, when all the guys get together… they’ll put on a game’ he said, unwilling to appear too keen.

Liam nodded in understanding. Suddenly, he realized that everyone who’d been around them a moment earlier had disappeared and he was standing there alone with Cody, expected to make small talk when all he wanted was to bury himself back in those big strong arms of his.

‘I like the beard’ Liam finally commented, unsure how to keep the conversation going yet knowing he desperately wanted to.

Cody looked embarrassed, running his hand across his chin and grimacing. ‘It’s just… a couple of days growth. You know… with the holidays and all.’

‘Well, it suits you’ Liam replied nervously, taking a deep breath to keep from saying something stupid - or at least more stupid than what he'd already blurted out. 

‘So, how’s school? Are you enjoying your classes?’ he asked, rather clumsily.

He did a mental eye roll - ‘how’s school?’ could he sound any more lame? 

‘Yeah, yeah, it’s good. Microbiology isn't the sexiest of majors but I’m enjoying it’ Cody said with an enthusiastic nod. ‘You?’

‘Yeah, I’m really liking my classes but I’m spending most of my time at the sports complex… you know, with practices and meetings’ he said - when I’m not out with my new boyfriend or making out with him in my dorm room he refrained from adding, suddenly worried that that tidbit of information might be tattooed to his forehead for everyone to see.

The awkward silence continued despite the dozens of questions Liam had bouncing around in his head: Have you met anyone new? Do you miss me as much as I miss you? Did we make a terrible mistake by breaking up? Is it too late for us? Do you still love me? Would you like to go upstairs and make out in one of the bedrooms?

He shook his head, trying to refocus.

‘Liam!’ came a voice from behind him, forcing his eyes away from Cody.

Liam turned to see an old basketball teammate of his staring back at him. ‘How you doing, man?’ the young man asked as he gave Liam an enthusiastic tap on the back.

‘Mark, hey! I’m good’ Liam replied, glancing nervously in Cody’s direction and realizing whatever tenuous connection they’d had a moment earlier had evaporated - the moment had passed.

Even though the interruption was a welcome relief from the awkwardness of the moment, Liam would have been more than happy to spend the rest of the evening just standing there feeling embarrassed if it meant he could keep staring at Cody Miller and those incredible hazel eyes of his.

‘I’m going to…. go get a drink’ Cody announced, to Liam’s dismay. ‘You two go ahead and catch up.’

And just like that, the man of his dreams disappeared into the crowd, leaving Liam shaken from their brief encounter and wishing it never had to end. 

WCWCWC

From his spot closest to the front door, Peter Burke had a unique sightline of practically the whole main floor of the Caffrey home. He’d settled in the armchair with his beer, enjoying the view and chatting away with the other guests who came in and out of his little orbit. He’d been in Neal and Sara’s house hundreds of times over the years but he could only remember sitting in the living room on a handful of occasions - mostly when the Caffreys entertained large groups, on holidays, or on the odd occasion, for after dinner drinks. 

For close friends and family, the nerve centre of the home had always been the back of the house where the kitchen and family room were located. That was the place where you could kick off your shoes and relax, the place where the four of them had shared countless meals, where they’d had animated discussions over the years, where they’d played cards, watched movies and enjoyed Neal’s delicious cooking and amazing desserts. Any memories of sitting in the living room revolved mostly around parties when the back of the house could not contain the large number of guests Neal just couldn't help himself from inviting. 

Mike Miller, with whom Peter had been chatting up until a moment ago, excused himself to go get a drink and Peter’s eyes swept the space, admiring the beautifully decorated Christmas tree and noticing his wife standing by the dining room table, drink in hand, as she discussed something with Cameron, Hope and Janelle O’Neill, one of the teachers from the school of art. El looked happy, relaxed; she always did when it came to social gatherings. She was always much more at ease than he was in these kinds of situations, an effortlessness she shared with his best friend and business partner. 

He let his eyes roam around the room, noticing Jeff Mason on the nearby couch, chatting away with another of Neal’s neighbours, a man Peter had just been introduced to but couldn't remember the name. Next to them, Lydia Jordan and her husband sat with a couple of other women, deep in discussion about some Broadway show, as far as he could tell.

Off in the distance, Peter could hear the loud murmur of voices - mostly men’s baritones - emanating from the kitchen. The loud buzz was punctuated by the occasional outburst of unrestrained laughter and he craned his neck, noticing Neal moving in and out of his sightline with a tray of food in his hands - a common sight. He’d been watching his best friend all evening. Neal would appear in the dining room, placing yet another platter of food or removing a nearly empty one and returning it to the kitchen to be refilled. He always looked so comfortable in these social situations, perfectly at ease flittering from one guest to the next, making sure everybody had something to drink, checking on the music, the food, making sure everything was just perfect. To be honest, he’d yet to see Neal sit down - so much like the consummate host he knew him to be. 

He watched as Neal reappeared in the dining room, hovering over the table and futzing with one of the dishes. Suddenly, Sara was there by his side, her hand lovingly placed on her husband’s back as he turned to look at her, his bright blue eyes resting on her smiling face. Peter sat there, observing the exchange with interest. It was subtle, to be sure, but nonetheless unmistakeable; the love in their eyes was palpable, the way in which they communicated with just a gentle touch, a loving gaze. Neal leaned over and without a word, kissed the tip of Sara’s nose and Peter watched as she gave him a dazzling smile and moved on, joining a group of women who were standing by the buffet, sipping glasses of champagne and occasionally reaching for one of the many delicious looking appetizers on the nearby table. 

Being married to Elizabeth Burke, the most amazing woman in the world, left Peter perfectly happy and fulfilled and yet, at times, he couldn't help but envy Neal and Sara’s easygoing relationship, the ease with which his best friend related to his wife, always keeping her centred, happy, content - with Sara, doing the same for him. Neal did it all with such ease and grace whereas Peter was always second guessing himself when it came to El, worrying he wasn't saying the right thing, or doing the right thing. Everything seemed so effortless for Neal; he always seemed to know exactly how to deal with Sara’s mood swings, what pleased her, what made her happy, what made her smile.  
Out of the corner of his eye, Peter spotted Caitlin whiz by behind him and head up the stairs on some sort of mission. Neal had confided that he and Sara were having a rough time with the young woman as she struggled with the precarious state of Linda Bennett’s health. He made a mental note to sit with Neal and have a chat, see how they were doing on that front. Then, there was the big announcement he needed to make… that required timing, as well. He wasn't looking forward to telling Neal about his upcoming retirement; no doubt, the younger man would be disappointed but he'd also be understanding. ‘It’s time you think of yourself’ he could well imagine Neal saying, ‘You deserve to take a break.’

Neal would never make him feel bad about calling it quits, it just wasn't his style, but Peter liked to think that his presence would be missed at the gallery. He sure as hell would miss not being there every day.

He felt a cold rush of air and turned to look towards the front door, spotting a very well bundled up Mozzie standing there and instantly Hope was taking his coat and bringing her arms around him in a welcoming hug.

‘Another beer, Peter?’ he heard, turning to face Neal who had snuck up on him.

‘Sure’ Peter replied, getting to his feet. ‘I can get it.’

‘That’s okay, I don’t mind’ Neal said, relieving his friend of his empty bottle. ‘You relax, enjoy the view.’

And just like that, he disappeared again to fetch him a drink, leaving Peter to marvel at the wonderfully mysterious social butterfly that was Neal Caffrey.

WCWCWC

Caitlin sat up on her bed, the sound of partygoers resonating just outside her bedroom door. She glanced at her phone, noting several messages from some of her so-called friends - the ones who always seemed to get her into trouble. She’d managed to duck their calls all day, intent on staying away from a raucous New Year’s Eve party at one of the kids’ places; truth was, she just wasn't much in the mood for partying. 

She thought back to her most recent visit to Linda Bennett just the day before. The old woman had looked a little more lively than the previous time she’d seen her but it was hard to tell if Linda was just putting on a brave face; she tended to do that a lot, it seemed.

She’d actually sat up in her bed and she and Caitlin had played a couple of hands of cribbage, something they’d gotten into the habit of doing during the young woman’s frequent visits to her grandmother’s room at Blue Skies. It was really just an excuse to sit and chat without having to look into each other’s eyes - a good way to have some of those more difficult conversations, those discussions you might not have otherwise.

‘You know, we have to start getting ready…’ Linda had said, her voice trembling.

At any other time, the remark might have appeared harmless but Caitlin knew the comment was anything but - her grandmother was urging her to prepare for the time when she would no longer be by her side.

‘I don’t want to talk about it, Grandma’ Caitlin said, avoiding Linda’s probing gaze.

The old woman’s hand was instantly on hers. ‘Sweetheart, we have to talk about it. I need to know that you’ll be all right when I’m gone… and that you’ll be there for Neal.’

The last comment rattled the young woman and she looked up at her grandma, seeing unshed tears in those bright blue eyes. Caitlin had dropped the cards from her hands and had instantly brought her arms around the old woman, cradling her lovingly against her chest.

‘I don’t want you to go’ she’d whispered, her voice failing her.

‘I know honey, I know’ Linda said, her voice considerably stronger. ‘But we’re lucky… we’ve had all this time and we can prepare.’

Caitlin had sobbed, holding her precious adoptive grandmother against her, trying in vain to shield her from the inevitable — but knowing full well it was an impossible feat.

The sound of voices brought her back to reality and Caitlin let out a loud sigh and wiped her cheek, staring down at the sculpture she’d been working on for the last few months. She’d intended it as a Christmas gift but she felt it still needed a few, last minute adjustments and Neal had spent some time helping her refine it while he’d been home over the holidays. Caitlin was pleased with the result and she ran her hand over the rough clay, feeling the indentations… every little detail, perfect. She closed her eyes and cradled the sculpture against her chest just as she’d held the woman herself; she hoped Linda would like it, after all, she’d poured her heart and soul into her most recent project. 

She could hear the sound of laughter floating up from downstairs and thought ahead to the next day when they would all be together as a family… perhaps for the last time.

WCWCWC

‘They’ve got it bad’ Jake said as he leaned in to talk to Will.

The two guys were observing Liam and Cody chatting nearby, surrounded by a group of friends, barely able to keep their eyes off each other.

‘You’re not kidding’ Will replied with a knowing grin. ‘But they’re both so pig-headed. They’re convinced they did the right thing for the other by breaking up and they don’t want to hurt each other.’

Jake looked back at his buddy, surprised at his comment. ‘You think Liam regrets walking away?’

Will gave him a disbelieving look. ‘Are you kidding?’ he said, pointing in their direction. ‘Look at him, he’s practically fawning all over him.’

‘I thought you said he was dating someone else at school’ Jake said, puzzled.

‘He is… but this Todd guy is obviously a rebound off Cody’ Will said with confidence.

Jake giggled as his face lit up, a memory coming to light. ‘Remember when Renée and I had that horrible fight last summer?’

Will laughed as he recalled the stupid argument that had escalated to mammoth proportions, leaving the couple at odds, ignoring each other at the annual picnic and baseball game and making things uncomfortable for everybody around them. If it hadn't been for Liam and Cody and their ingenuity, the young couple might still be fighting. 

‘I think it’s time we give those two a taste of their own medicine’ Jake said with a wink.

Will’s eyes grew and he nodded enthusiastically.

TBC


	8. Chapter 8

‘Neal sure knows how to throw a party’ Lydia Jordan said as she popped a spear of asparagus wrapped in prosciutto into her mouth and hummed in appreciation.

The small group of women, who were assembled around her, nodded in agreement, raising their glasses in a cheer to the host.

‘Wait a minute!’ Sara countered with mock annoyance. ‘What’s all this about Neal? How do you know I didn't make those asparagus… thingies?’

There was generalized chuckling and eye-rolling as Elizabeth spoke up, eyebrows raised in skepticism. 

‘The fact that you’re calling them asparagus thingies, for one thing’ she said knowingly. 

Sara grimaced as if she’d just sucked on a lemon and downed the rest of her drink. 

‘Fine… if that’s how you’re going to be’ she declared, pretending to be put out by her best friend’s comment. ‘I’ll go see if there’s any more of these… cheese bite things’ she said, grabbing an almost bare platter off the table and heading back towards the kitchen for a refill.

Try as she might, she couldn't pull the wool over the eyes of this knowledgeable group of women; they knew all too well who was responsible for ninety percent of the food preparation in the Caffrey home - and it wasn't Sara Ellis.

Sara weaved her way through the group of guests, noticing nothing but happy faces as she slipped into the kitchen where the men seemed to have congregated in great numbers, laughter echoing loudly.

Neal was holding court near the kitchen island, surrounded by Peter, Mike Miller, Jeff Mason, Sam Jordan and Bryan McNamara, his latest hire at the June Ellington School of Art. Everybody had a drink in hand, including Neal and no one would suspect he was drinking fizzy water instead of gin and tonic. He sipped slowly as one would do with a cocktail and he always used the same kind of glass he used for mixed drinks whenever he poured himself one - a small concession to the uneasiness he still felt when it came to his forced abstention from alcohol. 

He lifted his glass in a salute to his wife as his eyes met hers and she smiled back, happy to see he was having such a good time. After all the crap with Caitlin and the constant worrying about his mom, she was relieved to see he could still enjoy himself - even if it was for just a short while.

Sara opened the fridge and began poking around the dozen or so plastic containers on her search for more of those… cheese things that seemed to be so popular. She felt a gentle tap on her rear end and turned to find Neal’s face smiling down playfully at her.

‘Can I help you find something in there?’ he teased, leaning into the fridge and purposefully crowding her, making it hard for her to manoeuvre.

‘It’s okay, I can manage’ she said, a little too curtly. After all, she could certainly open a plastic container and load up a plate of appetizers without anybody’s help, thank you very much.

‘What’s the matter?’ Neal asked, sensing some tension in his wife’s body language.

‘Nothing…’ she mumbled but he wasn't buying it and she knew it.

She caved. ‘Okay, why does everybody always assume that you’re the one who made all the food. I did cut up the cheese for the cheese platter and what about the veggies…’

Neal grinned, amused by the fact that she would find such an assumption annoying… or even surprising.

‘Awww, come on Repo, be honest. You didn't even know what those chicken appetizers were called’ he said playfully, running his hand up and down her backside and giving her another playful slap on the rear end for punctuation.

She scowled back at him, unimpressed with his cockiness and yet, she couldn't help but smile in response. He always managed to get her to relax whenever he called her Repo - a term of endearment he’d coined back when they’d first started seeing each other, all those years ago. 

She remembered the first time he’d called her that, late at night in the city archives as she helped him pore through countless files during the Adler case. ‘So tell me Repo’ he’d said with that annoyingly glib grin of his. ‘Why are you helping out?’ He’d said it without much forethought, referring back to his earlier description of her position at Sterling Bosch as a high class repo man - something she had absolutely taken exception to. And yet, as they’d sat there that night, surrounded by mountains of files and photographs, he’d managed to say it good-naturedly with all the Caffrey charm he could muster and she’d realized from the get-go that she kind of liked it — despite trying very hard not to.

These days, when he murmured it, it was always said with a great deal of playfulness and affection - and that naughty sparkle in his eye. She couldn't help but relax whenever she heard it, Neal’s deep, rich voice caressing the pet name and making her feel special - and tingly all over. 

Throughout the years, Neal had resorted to plenty of terms of endearment to refer to his wife - as a matter of fact, he seemed to have one for every occasion. 

Over time, like many married couples, they’d both fallen victim to the dreaded overuse of the term ‘honey’. It was used all the time in everyday conversation — although neither Neal nor Sara had fallen prey to its shorthand ‘hon’, preferring to leave that term of endearment for the exclusive use of the Burkes. The simple yet sweet ‘honey’ seemed to flow easily in conversation and it was just a way of letting each other know there was love and affection between them, no matter how mundane - or serious - the discussion they were having. 

‘Sweetheart’ was reserved for when Neal was feeling particularly protective or romantic - a sweet, loving term of endearment meant to convey all the love and affection he had for his wife. He used it sparingly, considering the fact that, as she’d reminded him on numerous occasions, Sara Ellis might need his love, she might want his undying devotion and she might crave his adulation but she sure as hell didn't need his protection. 

‘Babe’ was limited to those times Neal pled his case for something he wanted - badly. Usually, it involved a request for some sexual favour although the term had been used on many occasions to help Sara snap out of a bad mood. In those situations, the word was spoken with longing, often drawn out ‘baaaabe’ as if pleading for her to understand where he was coming from or to get her to, please, see reason. Most times, it had the desired effect and therefore, Neal had kept it in his repertoire, calling on it regularly, as the situation required.

‘Baby’ on the other hand, was usually reserved for the bedroom - but the timing had to be just right, considering the fact that, in everyday life, Sara found the term sexist and somewhat chauvinistic. But when Neal used it in that breathless, halting voice of his just as he began to lose control between the sheets… well, it was hot as hell and the sound of his rough voice as he murmured it was usually enough to put her over the edge. And Sara wasn't about to complain about that.

Despite her expressed limitations for the use of the word, there was definitely a double standard as far as ‘baby’ was concerned. Sara used it too… plenty. Usually when she wanted to convey empathy for something Neal was going through, when she wanted to coddle him or coax him into something he didn't really want to do. Or she’d call him ‘sweetie’… and he actually let her. But her favourite pet name for Neal was ‘Caffrey’; she’d called him that since they’d first met and it was tantamount to his use of the term ‘Repo’; both nicknames spoken with just a touch of whimsy and the playfulness that best defined their relationship.

Finally, there were the terms of endearment neither one of them would touch with a ten foot pole - unless it was done in jest, of course. Words like ‘darling’, ‘dear’, ‘doll’ or, heaven forbid, ‘lover’ which Neal had commented sounded like a bad porn movie. References to food related words such as ‘pumpkin’ or ‘sugar’ were definitely non-starters. They were adults after all and both Neal and Sara shied away from such monikers when referring to one another. 

But Repo… well Repo seemed to fit like a glove; it was a pet name just for her and Sara was reasonably sure Neal had never used it when whispering sweet nothings to his previous paramours. It was all hers and it was always spoken with a tinge of humour and gentle ribbing, complimenting the playful banter that had always existed between the two of them. It was one of the ways Neal had found to coax his wife off her high horse when she got annoyed or impatient and it worked like magic. 

Every. Single. Time. Including this time.

‘So… where are they?’ she asked, falling prey to his charm and that twinkle in his eye.

‘What?’ he asked, seemingly forgetting what they’d been talking about.

‘The cheese things’ she said with an exaggerated pout.

Neal took a moment to deposit a kiss on her neck before reaching in around her for one of the containers, pulling it out of the fridge.

‘Right here’ he said, his voice rough. He rubbed up against her and winked, his eyes remaining glued to hers. 

Sara swooned.

WCWCWC

Mindy Miller looked around, searching the room with her eyes.

‘I was hoping I’d see Liam tonight’ she told Sara. ‘You know, I really miss having him around the house.’

Sara nodded; she felt the same way about Cody. ‘He was here earlier; he decided to go over to Will’s party after all’ she explained, matter of factly.

‘Oh…’ Mindy said, at a loss for words.

Sara picked up on something in her friend’s eyes. Surprise? Confusion? Consternation?

‘Why? What’s wrong?’

‘Nothing… it’s just that… Cody’s at that party, too.’

Sara’s eyes grew. She wondered if Liam knew that his ex would be there when he’d decided to head out. Surely, Will wouldn't have kept it from him and anyway, why shouldn't Cody be at the party? The two of them shared all the same friends, had hung out with the same kids all through high school. Their first face to face since their breakup was bound to be awkward but the two men had to bump into each other at some point, why not now?

‘Oh…’ Sara uttered just as Mindy had a moment before. ‘So, how’s Cody doing? Is he liking Columbia?’ Sara asked, with a tinge of nostalgia.

She loved the young man who’d been a permanent fixture in their house for going on five years: five Christmases, five summers hanging out together, five birthdays shared with each other, Liam’s in the spring, Cody’s in the dead of winter. Cody Miller was a sweet, thoughtful guy and he and Liam seemed to be a match made in heaven, at least that’s what it looked like to all those around them. 

Although she and Neal had been supportive of Liam’s decision to break up with Cody, Sara had to admit to a certain sadness at the news. But like all parents, all that really mattered to the Caffreys was that their kids be happy. Hope seemed to be settled in her relationship with Cameron, proudly wearing his ring and on the brink of making a big announcement any day now and Liam… well, Liam looked happy enough with his new life in Syracuse although it was hard to tell for sure, considering his rather quiet, brooding temperament. The young man had a tendency to keep things to himself and not share his thoughts and woes quite as easily as his sister did. Luckily, Neal had a knack for breaking through the veneer and get to whatever might be bothering him and Sara took solace in the fact that her husband would share any news he might uncover. 

When Sara had walked in on Liam a few days earlier, talking to his new boyfriend on the phone, she couldn't help but pick up on something, a certain lack of enthusiasm for the new man in his life. She’d shared her observation with Neal and he’d reminded her that, as parents, they couldn't live his life for him and that if Liam said he was happy… well, they would just have to take him at his word.

‘Cody’s doing great’ Mindy said with pride. ‘He seems to really be enjoying his classes and he’s still working part-time for that computer company he had a job with last summer.’ 

Despite the boys’ breakup, Mindy and Mike Miller had remained good friends of the Caffreys; Mindy, in particular, had really bonded with Sara following her kidnapping ordeal a few years back. As a criminal lawyer, she’d helped Sara navigate the complicated legal system as she sought justice against the man who’d sexually assaulted her. Since then, they had remained close and the two women had not so secretly mused about the possibility of becoming in-laws someday. Now, that didn't look like it was going to happen and the two women had been disappointed at the sudden and definitive end to Liam and Cody’s relationship.  
‘Is he seeing anyone?’ Sara asked, curious as to Cody’s status.

‘He went on a couple of dates just before Christmas but with a couple of different guys from the university. Nothing serious… yet’ she explained.

Sara waited for the unavoidable question.

‘What about Liam? Has he met anyone in Syracuse?’

Sara swallowed and looked over at her friend. ‘He’s been dating this guy he met in one of his business classes. His name is Todd.’

‘Oh’ Mindy replied, looking disappointed.

‘They’re young, Mindy’ Sara reminded her friend. ‘Who knows? Maybe Liam will move back here after university and… well, none of us knows what the future holds, right?’

‘You’re right. I’m glad Liam’s met someone. He’s a wonderful young man, he deserves to be happy.’ 

‘So does Cody’ Sara added with a sad smile. ‘Let’s just hope they both find what they’re looking for.’

WCWCWC

Like any good party worth its salt, the music and voices grew louder as the evening progressed — due, in part, to the levels of alcohol being consumed and the excitement and anticipation at the imminent arrival of the new year. Liam had been having an okay time, reminiscing with his old high school buddies and getting the scoop on what everyone was up to. After high school, they’d all gone their separate ways and it was nice to reconnect with his old friends and teammates. Of course, the fact that Liam was playing forward for the Syracuse Orange gave him somewhat of a rockstar status and he was enjoying the attention for a change, the tension in his shoulders finally abating now that he’d finally gotten that first awkward face to face with Cody out of the way. Despite the stimulating conversations, he was having a fair bit of trouble concentrating, his eyes constantly roaming the house in search of the young man who, he was realizing, still had a firm grip on his heart. 

The two men had chatted for a while and Cody had even suggested they catch up properly and meet up for coffee before Liam headed back upstate the following weekend. Liam had felt his heart thumping wildly in his chest and he’d given his ex a rather vague response… we’ll see… yeah, sure… maybe… In fact, he wasn't all that keen on spending time alone with Cody; truth was, it was physically painful to be standing so close to him and not be able to reach out and touch him, whisper in his ear, place a sweet kiss on his cheek or bring his arm around him and pull him close. It was probably best to avoid contact, at least until they had both completely healed - something Liam was beginning to think might never happen. 

He glanced down at his phone, seeing another text appear from horny Todd. The young man had been in touch all night and as the evening wore on, his texting had morphed into something more akin to sexting - a sure sign Todd was over imbibing at the family get-together he was attending back home in the Denver suburb of Englewood. The more Liam thought about it, the more he wondered if his dalliance with Todd Greenway wasn’t just a transition relationship and nothing more. Pining for one guy while dating boyfriend number two just didn't seem right. When he got back to Syracuse, he resolved to sit with him and have a serious talk about the status of their relationship; maybe it was time to let go. 

He punched in a happy face in response to Todd’s latest indecent proposal and tucked the phone back in his pocket, his eyes roaming the room, looking for Cody once again - something he’d been doing all night.

‘Liam!’ he heard from the nearby kitchen, the familiar voice of his best friend.

He made his way to find Will, noticing his gait was a little off; he was six Stellas in and if he wanted to be able to walk out of there under his own steam, he’d better slow down.

‘What?’ he shouted back, over the loud music.

‘Can you go down to the basement and get the bottles of champagne from the fridge?’ Will asked from his spot at the kitchen counter where he was refilling bowls of chips and pretzels. 

‘I wrote down the ones you need to bring up’ Will continued, barely audible over the sound of the thumping beat. ‘Don’t take my dad’s good stuff!’

He folded a bright yellow piece of paper into an airplane and sent it Liam’s way as Liam caught the airborne note and giggled - yeah, six was pretty well his limit.

Will’s dad had a full blown bar down in the basement as well as a wine cellar and a couple of extra fridges for extra storage when they entertained. The man was quite a wine connoisseur and his wife… well, she was a connoisseur of lunchtime martinis which extended to before dinner drinks and a couple of glasses with dinner and… so on and so on. She was nice enough but Liam had never seen the woman stone cold sober in all the years he’d been hanging out at the Allenby house.

Next to the laundry room, where Mrs. Allenby washed Mr. Allenby’s tidy whities, was a state of the art entertainment room complete with a pool table and an eighty inch flat screen that was the envy of the neighbourhood and the definitive place for the guys to watch the big games.

Liam opened the door to the basement and closed it behind him, sighing as the loud voices and music receded, a welcome relief. He’d just stepped off the last step and turned the corner when he found himself walking straight into Cody and he let out a little yelp in surprise.

‘Cody!’ he called out. ‘You startled me.’

‘Sorry’ Cody said, holding up a handful of champagne bottles. ‘Will sent me down here to get the champagne before midnight.’

Liam frowned as he replayed the conversation he’d just had with his best friend. 

‘That’s weird. Will just… he just sent me down here to get the champagne.'

He looked down at the note in his hands - not a list of bottles at all but rather a short note.

Liam let out a strangled chuckle, showing the note to Cody who promptly broke out in a grin. 'Don't come back up here until you two have worked thing out' it read.

‘How much do you want to bet that door is locked’ he said, pointing to the door at the top of the stairs.

Liam climbed the steps and tested the theory, not surprised to find they’d been locked in. He gave a few cursory knocks, the sound of his voice drowned out by the loud, blaring music coming from behind the door.

‘Come on guys, open up!’ he shouted as loud as he could. 

He turned back to look at Cody who was standing there with a puzzled look on his face.

‘I think we just got punked’ Liam said as he let his body slither down and settle on the top step of the staircase.

Cody seemed to be taking it all in stride; apparently, he wasn't terribly upset with the turn of events.

Liam made his way back down the stairs. ‘Why do I have a feeling this is payback for locking Jake and Renée in the field house last summer?’

Cody grinned back, holding up the champagne bottles in his hands. ‘At least we won't get thirsty!’

WCWCWC

A group of somewhat intoxicated partygoers traipsed through the Caffrey kitchen, lined up one behind the other like cabooses on a train, all of them wearing goofy party hats and tiaras and blowing noisily into their noisemakers. Neal and Peter stood back and chuckled at the sight of them as midnight drew near. 

‘Looks like I’ll be handing out a few of those taxi chits before the night is over’ Neal commented with a wide grin.

As the only stone cold sober individual in the house, he was still finding a way to enjoy himself, living vicariously through his guests — some of whom had clearly over imbibed. Peter lifted his beer in a toast and Neal brought his glass up to join in.

‘Five minutes, everybody!’ someone’s voice was heard calling out from the other room.

‘I had better go find my wife before the bell tolls’ Peter said as he followed the train out to the living room in search of Elizabeth.

Neal sighed loudly and looked around at the half eaten food and half empty bottles and glasses littering the counter. It would be a short night and they still had to get themselves organized for brunch with his mom in about twelve hours. 

‘There you are’ came Sara’s familiar voice as she wandered in. He picked up on just a hint of lilt in her voice, the way it always got when she’d had a couple of drinks.

She made her way to the refrigerator and poked around the back, coming up with a bottle of non-alcoholic champagne and pulling it out with a flourish. 

‘Ta da! Just for us’ she exclaimed as Neal smiled sweetly. There was a certain nostalgia associated with not being able to imbibe like everyone else but he reminded himself that there were so many worse things in life - like not having this amazing woman to share his New Year’s Eve with. 

Sara smiled broadly, her eyes bright and shiny, the festive candy apple dress she was wearing showing just the right amount of cleavage. She looked amazing and Neal wasted no time in bringing his arms around her as she struggled to get the bottle open. 

‘Stop it!’ she giggled as she struggled to reach for a couple of special champagne flutes in the cupboard - the special ones, the ones from their wedding.

He laughed heartily and they moved together towards the cupboard, voices growing louder in the front room as everyone began the countdown to midnight. 

‘Hurry’ she urged him as Neal pulled away just long enough to pop the bottle open and began pouring the bubbly into the two flutes she was holding in her hands.

He took one of the glasses from her hand and brought his other arm to snake around her waist, pulling her closer.

‘To a brand new year’ he said tapping his glass against hers. 

Sara nodded. ‘To a wonderful new year… together’ she added as she brought her lips to his, humming as he kissed her soundly.

He pulled away, that goofy look still on his face. 

‘I love you Repo’ he whispered as Auld Lang Syne was heard echoing through the house.

WCWCWC

The boys had decided to make the best of a bad situation and they’d uncorked a couple of bottles of champagne, each of them sipping away on a bottle of bubbly as they chatted, lounging on one of the leather couches in the entertainment room. It had been close to twenty minutes and still no one had come to rescue them - not that either one of them was complaining.

The sound of muted music was heard along with the hoots and hollers of those partying immediately above their heads. Liam was beginning to relax, the champagne going to his head - as champagne always did. Their conversation had grown more free and easy as time passed and they’d been exchanging anecdotes about their first few months at university, comparing notes on who had the most inept professor.

‘So what happened after that?’ Cody asked, beginning to relax.

‘Nothing, the guy never noticed it and he just kept teaching’ Liam said with a giggle.

‘You’re kidding, he taught the whole class like that?’

‘A bunch of us took pictures’ Liam said, his eyes bright. ‘A few of the guys actually posted them on Twitter.’

‘Oh my god! Did they get into trouble?’

‘How’s he gonna prove who did it?’ Liam countered. ‘Oh, wait a minute I have it on my Twitter feed.’

He began scrolling down on his phone, bypassing three more drunk texts from Todd and arriving at the photograph of his economics professor walking around the front of the large classroom with toilet paper hanging out the back of his pants. He chuckled, handing his phone over to Cody.

Cody laughed loudly in that carefree way Liam loved so much and he watched his ex-boyfriend’s eyes light up in amusement as he studied the embarrassing photograph. God, he missed that carefree laugh and he got an overwhelming urge to reach out and kiss those lips… just once. 

They grew quiet, the mood conducive to some more intimate sharing and Liam couldn't help himself any longer; he slid in a little closer to the other man, close enough to feel the heat radiating off his body.

‘Are you… dating anyone?’ he asked, a question that had been burning on his tongue all night.

‘Nothing serious. I went out with exactly two guys since we broke up’ Cody said with a smile. ‘No sparks… yet.’

‘I’m sorry’ Liam said, although he definitely was not sorry in the least.

‘What about you?’ Cody asked, still cradling Liam’s phone in his hands - a comforting connection to the young man sitting beside him.

‘I’ve… I’ve been seeing this guy off and on’ Liam confessed, skirting the truth. Suddenly, it had become really important that Cody know he still had feelings for him.

‘It’s nothing serious… just a few dates’ Liam added, in an attempt to downplay his budding romance with Todd Greenway.

Cody nodded and looked into Liam’s eyes, the sexual tension growing between them. There was silence, except for the loud voices coming from upstairs and the constant beat of the bass from some old Cars song - Will had always been retro when it came to music.

‘The truth is… I miss you Cody’ Liam said, his voice quiet.

He heard Cody sigh loudly. ‘We knew breaking up wasn't going be easy.’

‘I know… but I thought… you know, that my feelings might fade with time’ Liam admitted. ‘But since I’ve been back… I … I just can’t seem to stop thinking of you’ he said as the music cut out and they heard voices counting down to the new year.

10… 9… 8…

Cody leaned in a little closer and Liam’s hand came up to touch his cheek as their eyes met, pools of desire. 

7… 6… 5…

‘I miss you too’ Cody admitted, his voice soft.

4… 3… 2…

There was a soft beep emanating from Liam’s phone and the two of them froze, their lips a mere inches apart. Cody’s eyes were drawn to the screen he was still cradling in his hand and his face grew serious as he stared down at the banner with an incoming message. 

Liam frowned, wondering what had happened to change the mood so drastically. Just a second ago, they were on the verge of kissing and now, Cody was recoiling, pulling back.

‘You son of a bitch!’ Cody shouted as he threw the phone at Liam, leaving him perplexed for a brief moment.

Cody was instantly on his feet and was running up the stairs before Liam knew what had happened. He could hear him banging loudly against the basement door and he heard the door open, Cody’s footsteps receding in the distance.

He glanced down at his phone, as he clued in to what had just happened. Damn champagne making him so mellow; why hadn't he seen this coming?

Sure enough, the alert of an incoming text appeared on the screen, just the first few words of Todd’s latest indecent proposal but more than enough to draw a very vivid image.

‘Next time, I’m going to tie you to the bed and —’ 

‘Shit!’ Liam called out, slamming his phone against the nearby wall.

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

Liam sat in the Allenby’s basement, stunned by the unexpected turn of events. He'd gone from the pinnacle of bliss to the depths of despair in a few short seconds and he sat there, staring into space, waiting for the shock to wear off. He heard footsteps coming down the stairs and he sat up at attention; maybe Cody had changed his mind and had decided to give him a chance to explain.

His hopes were dashed when Will appeared and stood before him, puzzled at seeing the mess Liam had made of his phone and noticing the two empty bottles of champagne lying nearby. 

‘What the…’ he murmured. 

Liam looked up, hopelessness in his eyes. ‘Is he gone?’ he asked, his voice tight.

‘Yeah, he ran out of here like a bat out of hell. What happened?’

Liam just shook his head in dismay; he couldn't believe that the promising moment between him and Cody had been highjacked by another one of Todd Greenway’s suggestive - and obviously drunken - texts.

‘I got cock blocked by a fucking text, that’s what happened’ Liam said, his sad eyes looking back at his best friend. 

Will sat across from him, confused. ‘What?’

Liam stood, rather unsteadily and picked up his phone, realizing he had managed to do irreparable damage to the poor thing; Todd shouldn't expect a response anytime soon.

‘Todd… he’s been sexting me all night’ Liam admitted meekly.

Will stared back in surprise. ‘You’re kidding! People really do that?’

Liam let himself fall back on the couch, his body weary. ‘Yeah, well… he’s a horny little bugger when he’s sober so imagine what he’s like when he’s been drinking.’

‘So, what happened? Did you tell Cody about him?’

‘No!’ Liam replied adamantly. ‘Sort of… I mean, I told him I was dating someone and he said he’d had a couple of dates too… everything was going just fine until I showed him a picture of something on my phone and that stupid text popped up.’

‘So, you guys were actually… getting somewhere?’ Will asked; it seemed his instincts about the two of them had been right.

‘Were being the operative word’ Liam said, his voice unsteady. ‘God! I can’t believe it. We were finally connecting.’

Will studied his best friend. ‘I thought you didn't want to connect.’

Liam glared at him and almost instantly, his gaze softened. ‘You were right, Will. I’m really not over him. We should never have broken up’ he said sadly. ‘It was a terrible mistake and now, I’ve gone and screwed everything up.’

Will moved from where he’d been sitting, settling in next to Liam on the couch and bringing his hand to rest on his best friend’s back. ‘It’s not too late Liam, it’s never too late.’

‘No, you don't get it. I screwed up royally’ Liam countered. ‘He’s not going to want to talk to me.’

‘Look, it’s late, you’re drunk. Why don't you call your dad and ask him to come pick you up? We can talk about all this tomorrow’ Will suggested.

‘No… I don’t want to bother my dad. They’ve got a houseful of people and… he’s got enough on his plate with one kid who misbehaves’ Liam grumbled.

Will looked his best buddy up and down; rarely had he seen him in such a state. And he felt partly responsible for getting him there. 

WCWCWC

The party crowd in the Caffrey house began to thin out shortly after midnight; parents having to get home to their sitters, partygoers who’d done just about enough partying and were ready to call it a night. Upstairs, Caitlin had managed to fall asleep despite the constant rumbling of voices downstairs. The sculpture she’d been caressing teetered on her stomach, her hands relaxing and falling away from its solid form. 

A familiar ring tone was heard by her bedside and Caitlin reached out for her phone, frowning as she noticed the 305 area code on the screen. She had no idea where that was or who might be calling, for that matter.

‘Hello?’ she said, still groggy. 

‘Hi sis’ the man’s voice said at the other end.

‘Jesse!’ Caitlin said, instantly coming to life. 

‘Yeah, it’s me. I… just wanted to call and let you know I’m still alive and… well, wish you a happy new year.’

Caitlin hadn’t heard from her step brother since the previous new year when he’d logged a similar call, promising to stay in touch and come to New York to see her - a promise he hadn’t kept.

‘Where are you calling from?’ Caitlin asked, sitting up on the bed. 

‘I’m in Florida… I’ve been travelling around working rodeos and doing odd jobs and stuff. What about you? How are you doing? Did you start school in September like you’d planned?’

Caitlin sat up straighter and placed the sculpture on her bedside table for safekeeping. ‘I decided to wait a year so right now, I’m still working at the day care and I got a few extra hours working at a coffee shop not far from here.’

‘That’s good, that’s good’ the voice said from far away. ‘So, are you still living with the Caffertys?’ 

‘Yeah. But it’s the Caffreys… Neal and Sara’ she corrected. ‘They’ve been really patient with me, especially lately.’ 

‘Have you heard anything from Mom?’ the man asked, his voice growing serious.

She could hear voices and noises in the background - a party of maybe a bar?

‘Not for a couple of months’ she admitted with just a tinge of sadness. ‘She must be on another one of her benders. Sometimes, I prefer not to hear from her, to be honest.’

‘I hear you’ he replied.

There was an uncomfortable silence for a moment; both of them knew all too well that their mother couldn't be counted on for anything. Caitlin heard a beep on the line, indicating an incoming call, just as a man’s voice was heard in the background calling Jesse’s name.

‘Look, I gotta go, sis’ he mumbled apologetically. ‘You take good care of yourself, okay? And don’t get yourself into any trouble.’

‘Jess, please… will you come and visit me here in New York? I really miss you.’ Caitlin pleaded, hoping she didn't sound too desperate. 

‘Of course… of course, I will’ the young man said. ‘I’ll call you, okay? I promise’ he said.

She’d heard it all before; except for checking in once or twice a year, Jesse Davis had a lot of Jackie Somersby in him and he couldn't be counted on for much more than the occasional phone call but still… she wasn't ready to give up on him - not just yet.

‘Bye sis’ he said with a tinge of regret. ‘Take care.’

‘Bye Jess’ she replied with sadness, hanging up and picking up the incoming call.

She had a momentary image of her mom, drunk as a skunk, calling to beg for forgiveness for not being in touch but instead, she heard a voice she didn't recognize - a young man’s voice.

‘Caitlin? It’s Will Allenby’ said the voice. 

Will Allenby? Liam’s Will Allenby? Why the hell was he calling her?  
‘Liam’s had a bit of a rough night and he could use a drive home’ the young man said. ‘He doesn't want to bother his dad. Are you… have you been drinking? Do you think you can come by and pick him up. Otherwise… I’ll put him in a cab.’

Caitlin stood up, practically stepping on Raffie’s tail in the process. She hadn't even noticed the dog lying there by her bed, where he'd obviously taken refuge from all the noise and people downstairs.

‘How bad is he?’ she asked as she imagined trying to get a drunken Liam into the car. At six-foot-two and two hundred pounds, she would have a helluva time handling him by herself if he was too far gone.

‘He’s not that bad just… his phone got smashed, that’s why I’m calling you’ Will replied.

Truth was, Liam had just run into the bathroom to regurgitate the bottle of champagne he’d ingested and he didn't have a clue Will was working behind the scenes to secure him a ride home - without having to upset his folks.

‘Yeah, yeah, of course, I can come. I haven't had anything to drink tonight’ she said, moving around the room. ‘I’ll be there in ten.’

Turnabout was fair play and considering Liam had come to her rescue a few nights before, maybe she could finally make amends by doing him a solid.

Raffie looked up at her and sighed, letting his head fall back on the warm carpet by the bed.

Humans! he thought.

WCWCWC

New Year’s Day dawned glorious — wintery cold but with bright sunshine, a harbinger of an auspicious new beginning. Neal was up at the crack of dawn, finishing up the cleanup in the kitchen and pulling together a basket of goodies to take over to the Blue Skies Nursing Home. He’d slept soundly - just not long enough - and even though their New Year’s Eve party had been a total success, he was looking forward to a more low key celebration with his immediate family. It had been well past two in the morning before the last of the guests had left; thankfully, Elizabeth and Sara had made a good start on the cleanup by then and when the Burkes finally departed, last as always, Neal and Sara had just left everything as it was and crawled up to bed to join the rest of the family.

Liam had snuck in at some point - although Neal hadn't really noticed when exactly or what state he’d been in. All he knew was that Caitlin had slipped out, unnoticed, to pick him up over at Will’s place and that by the time he and Sara had made it to bed, everyone was present and accounted for. Hope had slept over with Cam up in her room on the third floor - a concession Neal and Sara were making more and more often these days. Although in the beginning, having Cam share his daughter’s bed had been a non-starter, Neal had mellowed as their commitment grew deeper and now that they were engaged, he and Sara had softened a little on the issue, just thankful that Hope was home with them.

‘Hey Dad!’ came her sleepy voice. Speak of the devil.

‘Good morning!’ Neal called out, doing his best to sound bright eyed and bushy tailed. ‘What are you doing up so early? I thought I’d have to come up myself and drag you out of bed.’

Hope crawled over to the coffee maker, dragging her feet, her thick and wavy mane askew and her eyes bleary. ‘I want to get started on that frittata for brunch.’

Neal nodded and continued with the job of getting some of the leftovers packed up into a nice care package for his mom - although he suspected that the staff at the nursing home would probably be the ones to enjoy it. Linda didn't have much of an appetite these days and her frail body had withered away even more since her recent bout with pneumonia. 

‘How’d you sleep?’ he asked, noticing how rough she looked; there were definite advantages to refraining from alcohol and feeling sharp and alert the next morning was definitely one of them.

‘Okay, I suppose… not enough, though. I’m letting Cam sleep in’ she commented, pouring herself a cup of coffee and making a detour to refill her dad’s mug as well.

‘Is Mom up?’ Neal asked; the last time he’d seen Sara she had buried her face in her pillow, refusing to get up.

‘She’s on the phone… with Auntie Em, I think’ Hope said, reaching into the fridge for some cream.

‘Any other signs of life?’ Neal pressed.

‘Naw, it’s all pretty quiet up there’ she replied. ‘Liam looked a little upset when he came in last night, though.’

‘Oh, yeah? I didn’t even see him come in. What time was it, anyway?’

‘I don’t know… around twelve thirty, I guess’ she said, taking a seat and picking at a cold mini quiche laying there, popping it into her mouth.

She grimaced; it was cold and rather unappetizing in its present state - or maybe it was her churning stomach.

‘What makes you think he was upset? Did he say anything?’ Neal prodded.

‘No, he wasn’t in any mood to talk’ she replied with an eye roll. Liam had looked pretty rough and he'd obviously had more than his fill of booze - but Neal didn't need to know that.

‘I hope he didn't fall out with Will or anything.’

‘No, I think it had something to do with Cody’ she said with a shrug.

‘Cody?’ Neal repeated, curious eyes growing in response. 

‘Good morning, family’ came Sara’s voice. She was looking more than a little rough, her hair disheveled, her eyes still tiny with sleep.

‘Oh, I see you managed to drag yourself out of bed there, Rip Van Winkle’ Neal teased as she trudge by him and, just as Hope had done, reached into the cupboard for a mug.

‘Emily called… she wishes everybody a happy new year’ Sara said, her voice monotone.

‘How was her big gala?’ Neal asked; the art society of which Emily Ellis-Foster was a proud patron had been hosting a big New Year’s Eve bash back in Chicago - as a matter of fact, it had been the main reason for her early departure.

‘She said it was boring as hell and she wishes she’d stayed longer so she could be at our party’ Sara replied with a giggle.

‘Ah, those art types’ Neal said with a head shake. ‘They’re such a stuffy bunch.’

‘So, what’s the plan here?’ Sara asked, settling in next to her daughter at the kitchen table to watch Neal work.

‘Well…’ Neal said, placing a plastic container into a large cardboard box on the counter, well out of reach of Raffie. The old pooch had been hanging around with an exaggerated interest in what Neal was doing. ‘We’ve got the room starting at noon and there’s a stove and a microwave so I’m just figuring out what we should bring over. Hope says she wants to make a frittata.’

Sara looked over at her daughter, eyebrows raised, impressed by her daughter’s earnestness. ‘That’s awfully ambitious of you’ she commented.

‘Grandma liked it when she was over at Thanksgiving’ Hope explained as Sara nodded in understanding.

‘Honey, where did you put the presents for the nursing home staff?’ Neal asked, glancing around the kitchen and the family room.

‘They’re still under the tree’ Sara replied. ‘I’ll get them.’

‘It’s okay, Mom’ Hope said, getting to her feet. ‘I got it.’

Sara stood to join Neal at the kitchen island, peeking around him to see what he was doing. 

‘Can I help you?’ Neal teased, glancing over his shoulder at his bleary-eyed wife.

‘Maybe…’ she cooed as she brought her arms around his waist and lay her head against his back lazily. ‘Mmmmm. Let’s go back to bed, Caffrey’ she muttered sleepily.

Neal chuckled and kept working; Sara was a bear if she didn't get her full seven hours of sleep. Hope returned with a half dozen wrapped gifts in her arms, handing them to her dad who immediately placed them in the box alongside the containers of food, Sara still plastered to his back.

‘I made some fudge for Georgina’ Neal said, referring to the nurse who was assigned to his mom and who took such excellent care of her on a daily basis. 

‘What do you mean, for Georgina? That fudge wasn't for us?’ Sara teased, opening the fridge and reaching towards the back. ‘Oops!’

‘You better be kidding’ Neal admonished with a frown. ‘Or you’ll be making another batch.’

Hope chuckled as Sara pulled a container from the very back and handed it to Neal to be added to the bounty. There was another set of footsteps coming down the stairs and everybody glanced in that direction as Caitlin appeared, still in her jammies. 

‘Happy New Year, Caffreys’ she called out, looking a lot more alert than the rest of them.

Neal’s eyes were drawn to the sculpture in her hand and he smiled despite himself. She’d been working on it for weeks - two hands clasped together made from a mold of hers and Linda’s hands. She’d used clay for a warmer effect - lately, she’d been experimenting with marble and glass but in this case, she’d felt they were both too cold to convey the warmth of their relationship. It was a work of art to be sure and Neal reflected that it would have brought in a tidy sum at the gallery if she’d been willing to part with it - which she most definitely was not.

‘Did you want to gift wrap that?’ Sara asked. ‘There’s a box of wrapping paper and ribbon on the landing in the basement.’ 

‘It’s okay’ Caitlin replied, reaching into the large box and placing it inside securely.

‘It’s really beautiful Caitlin’ Hope remarked with a smile; sculpture had never been her thing but the young woman had a real talent and Hope recognized talent when she saw it.

Raffie was suddenly on his feet, his tail wagging and right on cue, the front door opened - although Neal could have sworn it had been locked the last time he checked.

‘Good morning’ came Mozzie’s voice from the front hall; the guy had been gone for less than twelve hours and here he was, back for more. 

He appeared in the kitchen, rubbing his hands in glee. ‘Any chance of breakfast this morning?’

Neal and Sara exchanged exasperated sighs; it seemed the new year was starting out just as the old year had ended.

WCWCWC

The hallways of the Blue Skies Nursing Home were quieter than usual when the Caffrey clan descended just before noon. Being a holiday, the place was running on skeleton staff and besides, many of the residents were out visiting family, a luxury Linda Bennett did not have at the moment.

Liam and Cameron carried in the large boxes full of goodies and Sara followed the two of them into the communal dining room so she could start setting up while Neal, Hope and Caitlin headed up to the fourth floor to check on Linda. They could hear soft voices as they got closer to her room - a good sign, to be sure. Caitlin was the first to step in with a spring in her step, hopeful this was a good day for her grandmother.

Apparently, it was.

Georgina, her trusty nurse was fussing around her, fixing her hair and Linda was sitting up in bed, fully dressed in a pretty floral blouse and slacks.

‘Grandma!’ Caitlin exclaimed as she ran in with Neal and Hope following close behind.

‘Good morning’ the woman replied with what was obviously a forced smile. She immediately went into a coughing fit and the nurse adjusted the oxygen flow on her cannula as everyone waited for her to catch her breath.

‘Hi Mom!’ Neal called out, joining Caitlin at her side and placing a kiss on her head. ‘Good morning, Georgina.’

‘See, I told you they’d get here soon’ the woman said reassuringly. ‘She’s been really excited about today, we’ve been up for hours getting ready, haven't we, Mrs. Bennett.’

Linda smiled like a young girl, waiting for her date to pick her up for the prom. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out that what they were looking at was mostly window dressing. Neal knew that underneath the clothes and the hair was a body which was withering away - she weighed barely a hundred pounds the last time he’d checked.

‘I made you a broccoli frittata, Grandma’ Hope chimed in as she sat on the edge of the bed, taking the woman’s hand in hers. ‘Just like the one you had at our house.’

‘Well, it looks like you’re in good hands, Mrs. Bennett. I’ll leave you to it’ Georgina said, preparing to leave the room.

Neal gave her a head nod in the direction of the door and the two of them stepped out into the hallway as Caitlin and Hope helped their grandma sit up on the edge of the bed.

‘So, how is she today?’ Neal asked, his voice quiet.

‘Actually, she seems to have rallied a little since yesterday’ she replied as Neal smiled. ‘But… you should know that things can change dramatically from day to day. I think she’s really excited to have everybody here and she’s giving it all she’s got. Just don’t let her get too tired.’

Neal nodded, his face growing sombre. His mom was a fighter and he knew she’d be putting on a brave face for all of them, today of all days. With Liam away at school, they didn't have as many chances to all be together and who knew when - or if - there would have this opportunity again. 

The young woman picked up on the sadness in Neal’s eyes and her hand rested on his arm, looking him in the eye. ‘You know, Mr. Caffrey, all any of us have is today and I think you should just enjoy having her with you while you can.’

Neal nodded, looking down at his hands and noticing the gift bag he’d brought up. ‘Oh, this is for you… to thank you for everything you’ve done.’

Georgina peeked into the bag. ‘Oh!’ she said, the sweet smell of fudge filling her nostrils. ‘You do know my weakness Mr. Caffrey.’

‘Dad!’ Neal heard coming from the room. ‘Can you give us a hand getting Grandma in her chair?’

WCWCWC

There was an oddly solemn mood to the festive occasion. Everyone seemed lost in thought - the same thought - that their time with Linda Bennett was slowly coming to an end. Liam and Cameron did their best to liven the party with an impromptu, albeit very poor, performance of ‘My Girl’ which they sang to Linda, something she seemed to enjoy despite the jeers and boos of the rest of the captive audience.

Between fits of coughing, Linda forced herself to have a few bites of food, making a point of tasting the frittata Hope had worked hard to prepare and commenting favourably as she tasted little morsels of Neal’s many creations. The kids filled the silence with their youth and exuberance and Caitlin presented her grandmother with the sculpture she’d worked so hard at perfecting while everyone observed from the sidelines.

By one thirty, Linda had hit the wall and was sound asleep in the wheelchair she’d been propped up in as Sara wedged a pillow behind her neck so the old woman could rest her head. 

The party continued for a little while longer although the guest of honour had checked out, unable to remain awake for more than a few minutes at a time. Neal prepared some tea for everyone and placed a cup in front of Linda’s sleeping form; maybe she’d wake up and take a sip or two. He set out a plate of desserts left over from the night before and everybody - especially Liam and Cam - went to town, trying out all the stuff they hadn't gotten around to having at the party: some nanaimo bars, lemon squares and butter tarts among other delicacies. 

‘Mmmm’ Sara cooed as she tasted a cherry bar. She didn't indulge much in the dessert department but having all those luscious sweets spread out in front of her seemed to be too much to resist. 

‘Dad, these are great!’ Liam said, his mouth full as he munched on one of his dad’s signature black and white macaroons. 

‘Have another’ Neal said as he held up a container chock full of goodies. ‘There’s plenty!’

Caitlin sat, her hand holding Linda’s as the elderly woman slept through most of the festivities. Both Sara and Neal were trying to keep the mood light; after all, it was New Year’s Day and they were all together.

Neal looked over at Sara, eyes questioning. ‘Caitlin’ he finally said. ‘Do you want to help me deliver the rest of these presents to the staff at the nursing station?’

‘I don’t know… what about Grandma?’ she said, her eyes still peeled on the older woman.

Neal wasn't about to take no for an answer. He stood and took Caitlin’s arm, bringing her to her feet. ‘She’ll be fine. Come on.’

Caitlin relented; taking the box of gifts from the table and following her foster dad out of the room and down the hall.

‘We barely saw you last night’ Neal commented as they ambled down the hallway.

‘I was… tired’ she replied. ‘Thought you’d appreciate me staying out of trouble… for a change.’

‘I did… I do and I appreciate you going to pick up Liam over at Will’s place’ Neal said, bringing his arm around Caitlin’s shoulder.

They arrived at the elevator and pressed the up button to return to the nursing station on Linda’s floor. 

‘You seem a little down. Did you hear from your mom last night?’ Neal asked. He knew all too well that one phone call from the messed up woman was enough to throw Caitlin off, even at the best of times.

‘No…’ she replied. ‘Frankly, I prefer it that way. But Jesse called’ she added with a sad smile.

The Caffreys had been hearing about Caitlin’s step brother since she’d come to live with them — although they’d never actually met him. Neal knew very little about the man - except that he was a good ten years older than Caitlin and that he was a drifter, maybe even a grifter, of that he wasn't certain. What was certain was that Caitlin held the man in high regard; she always got excited whenever he called which was usually once a year - twice if he remembered her birthday. 

‘How is he?’ Neal asked.

‘He’s in Florida, says he’s working for the rodeo and travelling around’ she replied with what was close to a smile. ‘He promised me that this is the year he’s coming for a visit.’

Caitlin had faced a lot of disappointment in her young life, people wandering in and out, never sticking around for very long and he and Sara were bound and determined not to be added to the long list of those who’d abandoned the young woman. His mind returned to his mom, the single most important person in young Caitlin’s life; he knew she was suffering from watching the older woman slowly fade away.

‘Look, I know this is hard on you… seeing Grandma like that’ he said, his voice tinged with regret. ‘The truth is, we don't know how long she’ll be with us. All we can do is be there for her and enjoy the next little while.’

Caitlin peeked out from underneath her blond bangs. ‘Hope says it was the same thing when her grandma June died.’ 

Neal swallowed, his thoughts drifting to June Ellington, the wonderful woman who’d been there for him since the day he’d been released from prison, all those years ago. He thought of her every single day as he crossed the threshold at the school of art - a monument to the amazing person she’d been and the mentor she’d been forced to become.

‘How did you cope… when she died?’ Caitlin asked, her voice quiet.

‘You… you try to get through the first little while the best you can… one day at a time’ Neal said, realizing she was turning to him for guidance and support. Seeing the pain in the young woman’s eyes, he searched for the right words to comfort her, to help her deal with what was inevitably ahead.

‘At first, I was sad whenever I thought about June and then, slowly, I began to focus on the art school, on her legacy… on doing something she would be proud of. After a while, you just begin to focus more on the good things, the happy memories and now, whenever I think of June, I smile. I think of the wonderful life she lived, all the people she touched and how the inheritance she left can help kids… like you.’

Caitlin grew quiet, letting the wise comments sink in as Neal continued. ‘You just need to figure out the best way to pay homage to Grandma, figure out how you can keep making her proud of you… even after she’s gone.’

They stopped a few steps short of their destination and Caitlin turned to look at Neal, her eyes brimming with tears. He took the box of gifts from her hands and laid it down on the ground, opening up his arms to her as she began to cry softly. He lay his chin on top of her head, feeling her quivering against him.

‘And most importantly’ he whispered into her hair. ‘You’re not alone. We’ll be there and we’ll all face it together.’

TBC


	10. Chapter 10

The Caffrey family New Year’s Day luncheon came to an end shortly after three o’clock. Linda had continued to drift in and out of consciousness all through the meal, falling asleep at the drop of hat, only to open her eyes every few minutes, just long enough to take a few bites and smile a tired smile. When the time came to leave, Neal settled his mom into bed for a much needed nap, making her as comfortable as possible as she briefly opened her eyes to look up at her son. He kissed the top of her head, urging her to go back to sleep and reminding her that he'd be back in a couple of days for another visit. 

The elderly woman had been oblivious to all of them as they took turns saying their goodbyes. 

Sara noticed Liam dawdling a little longer than usual when it came to his turn. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out what he was thinking; now that he was away at university, he would only be making it home every few months and he had to be wondering if his next visit might be to attend his grandmother’s funeral. Sara jabbed Neal gently, drawing his attention to the scene and he nodded; he’d been thinking the exact same thing.

‘I’m going to stay a little while longer’ Caitlin announced as everyone prepared to leave.

Sara stepped forward, kissing her foster daughter on the forehead. ‘Don’t overdo it, okay? Call if you need a ride home.’ 

Caitlin nodded and watched her adoptive family leave before settling in next to her beloved grandmother, taking her hand and squeezing it tightly. Her eyes were drawn to the silky white hair framing her weathered, narrow face - this woman had been through so much in her long, storied life. A small smile graced Linda’s lips as she slept; luckily she didn't appear to be in any discomfort - at least not at the moment. 

Caitlin still couldn't quite figure out how this old lady, who she’d been introduced to just a few short years ago, had managed to have such a major influence on her young life. On the surface, the two had very little in common - except perhaps for the fact that they’d both suffered their share of heartache over the years. They’d both been called on to deal with issues of abandonment and unresolved grief and yet, Linda Bennet had risen above the heartache and chosen to finish out her life with acts of kindness and a graceful acceptance of the cards life had dealt her. 

Whenever they had one of their heart to hearts, Caitlin always felt that Linda understood what she was going through - how being abandoned by your parents at such a young age left you feeling so lost and vulnerable that all you wanted to do was give the whole world a giant finger. Linda’s words resonated with the young woman and she always spoke of Caitlin’s future in positive terms, using words like love and hope and success, things Caitlin had all but given up on until she’d met Neal and Sara Caffrey. 

The door to the room creaked open and Georgina appeared, eager to check on her favourite patient. She gave Caitlin a small smile before adjusting Linda’s oxygen and doing a quick check of her patient’s vital signs.

‘Did you and your family have a nice lunch?’ she asked the young woman who sat there, holding Linda’s hand.

‘Yeah… she ate a little bit, not much’ Caitlin replied. ‘She slept most of the time.’

‘Unfortunately, she hasn't had much of an appetite since she’s gotten back from the hospital, not that she’s ever been a very big eater’ Georgina commented. ‘It’s important to keep her hydrated, though. Just take your cue from her.’ 

Caitlin nodded. ‘Do you think…’ she hesitated, unsure what exactly she was asking. ‘Is she going to get better?’

‘Mrs. Bennett is tough, she’s gotten over the worse of this horrible pneumonia’ Georgina began, gently touching the sleeping woman’s hair. ‘But she’s still very vulnerable and… it’s hard to keep a lid on infections in a place like this, especially pulmonary infections.’

‘Do you think she’d be better off living at home… with us?’ Caitlin asked, her eyes lighting up at the thought of having Linda staying with them back in White Plains.

‘She requires twenty-four hour care’ Georgina said with a kind smile. ‘And this is her home now. I think I know your grandmother pretty well and I get the impression she’d hate the idea of having all of you fussing over her.’

Caitlin’s smile faded as she nodded in understanding.

‘You work at the daycare, don’t you? I’ve seen you on the playground with the kids’ the woman said as she fiddled with Linda’s bedding, getting the pillows just right.

‘Yeah, I work with the preschoolers… twenty hours a week.’

‘I’ve always wanted to work with kids. But I’ve got my little guy, he keeps me pretty busy.’

‘Oh, yeah? How old is he?’ Caitlin asked.

‘He’s three and a bit. Actually, he’s on the waiting list for a spot at the daycare but… it’s hard to get in.’

Caitlin nodded; the workplace daycare was very popular with the nursing home’s employees and there were never enough subsidies for all those who needed them.

‘So, who takes care of him now?’ she asked.

‘I live with my mom and she watches him while I’m at work but she’s no spring chicken herself and sometimes I worry…’ she replied, leaving her thought incomplete.

‘What’s his name? I could talk to Mrs. Dennison and find out where he is on the waiting list’ Caitlin offered.

‘Aidan… Aidan Morrison’ the woman said softly. ‘He… he has his dad’s name. Actually, it’s the only thing the loser gave to him before disappearing in a cloud of dust.’

She looked away, slightly embarrassed and fearing she’d been unprofessional but Caitlin just smiled back kindly; she’d seen a lot of single moms trying their best to get by. 

Just then, Linda eyes fluttered open as she looked up at the two faces staring down at her.

‘Did… did I fall asleep?’ she asked.

WCWCWC 

It was only eight o’clock but Neal was already conked out on the couch in front of the television despite the singing nuns who were droning on about how to solve a problem like Maria. Sara came into the family room and grinned at the sight of him; for all the boundless energy the man had, when he crashed, he really crashed. She prodded him to lie down, grabbed for the blanket on the back of the couch and covered his outstretched legs, nudging him to lift his head up off the couch so she could slip in underneath him. He woke briefly, almost immediately settling in her lap with a soft mewling sound as she placed her hand on his head and began caressing his thick head of hair.

She recalled how he’d thrown the car keys in her direction as they’d hit the parking lot at Blue Skies.

‘You drive’ he’d said as her eyes grew in surprise.

Normally, he hated relinquishing control behind the wheel; as a matter of fact, her dubious (by his standards) driving skills had been fodder for teasing and the cause of many an argument over the years. And yet, he’d handed over the keys without a second thought. After prodding, he’d admitted to feeling a little light headed, no doubt a side effect of this new drug he was taking - or so he insisted. Sara’s worries weren't easily quelled and by the time they’d arrived home, she’d managed to nag him into a follow-up appointment with the doctor to see if his meds could be adjusted. Light headedness and dizziness - as well as headaches - were common side effects of the new drug but the last thing she wanted was to be picking her husband off the ground following an inelegant face plant in the middle of a parking lot.

Neal fidgeted on her lap, bringing his arm up and tucking it under her leg as he gave it a tight hug. Sara heard him sigh in contentment, followed by silence as the television droned on. Hope was upstairs with Cameron and Liam had gone up to his room to watch something on his computer. No sign of Caitlin yet; if the past was any indication, she probably wanted to tuck her grandma in for the night before heading home.

It was a relief to see Caitlin was finally settling down after a couple of rough weeks - although Sara was fully aware that just about anything could set the young woman off at any given time. She was definitely on tender hooks these days, as they all were, worried about the state of Linda’s health. Despite the nagging worry and Caitlin’s recent shenanigans, Sara had to admit it had been a wonderful holiday season. Emily had visited during the week leading up to Christmas, sharing in the family’s magical Christmas morning ritual, complete with a copious brunch and the usual gift exchange. 

After all those years apart, Sara was becoming accustomed to having her sister around at Christmastime - not that their get-togethers were limited to the holiday season. Ever since they’d found each other again, Emily had made it a point of coming to New York four to six times a year and Sara had done the same, visiting her sister in Chicago every few months. Mostly though, their reunions took place at the Caffrey home - the house in White Plains had more room than Emily’s small apartment and, that way, Emily got to see the whole family. Sara’s trips to Chicago were limited to those times when she needed to get away from work for a few days - for some girl time, shopping, mani-pedis, dinners out and late nights catching up on all those years that fate had conspired to keep them apart.

Sara’s mind wandered back to her mother-in-law; she’d looked particularly frail that afternoon as they’d all bustled around her. In fact, she’d slept through most of the festivities, opening her eyes from time to time to say a few words and smile weakly. 

Sara could see how much Neal was hurting as her health continued to deteriorate. Recently, on top of his regular weekend visits, he’d gotten into the habit of dropping by the nursing home at lunchtime three days a week. On Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, he would leave the school of art in the Bronx and drive to New Rochelle to spend a precious hour with his mom, sometimes bringing along his own lunch, and after coaxing her to take a few bites, he would tuck her in for her afternoon nap before heading out to Manhattan to check on things at the gallery. On those days in particular, he was exhausted by the time he got home. He’d trudge up to bed, dragging his laptop with him so he could catch up on e-mails before returning to work the next day. Most nights, Sara found him asleep in front of the screen and had to tuck him into bed like a sleepy two-year-old. Their sex life had been practically non-existent for weeks now — except for the occasional morning clinches when Neal woke, fully rested and raring to go. 

Sara had witnessed her husband’s struggle in the aftermath of June’s death and she braced herself for more of the same. Neal was a loving, compassionate man and she knew that Linda’s eventual passing would leave him shaken up. The two of them had reconciled after a decades long separation; watching her leave his life again would be hard on him and she prayed he’d be able to cope with the situation without falling back on the dangerous habit he'd fallen into following Hope’s accident. No way was she letting that happen without a fight.

Neal’s relationship with his mother had been complicated from the get go. He’d drifted away from home in his teens and as soon as he'd been able to do so, he’d left behind the mess which was his life in St Louis and he'd headed to New York, seduced by the thrill and excitement of the big city. Forty years later, their reconciliation had been just as complicated. It had taken several months and some insistent prodding on Sara’s part to get Neal to realize that deep down, he wanted his mom back in his life. Now, he couldn't imagine not having her nearby and Sara knew he was in for a rough time in the weeks and months to come. It would be her job to stand by him and make sure he got the support he needed to cope with the inevitable loss.

‘Mom?’ Hope’s soft voice was heard over the sound of the television. She appeared, already clad in her pyjamas, a pair of oversized koala bear slippers on her feet, a Christmas gift from her thoughtful fiancé - the one with the odd sense of humour. ‘Can Cam sleep over again tonight?’

What had begun as a privilege reserved for very special occasions had become a little more frequent as of late and Neal and Sara had agreed to loosen the reins. Saying no would just push their daughter away and she’d likely just follow Cam out to his apartment in Flushing - no better, by any stretch of the imagination. After all, she wasn't an innocent, wide eyed teenager who needed protection from some predator; Cameron Armstrong was the love of her life and about to become her husband. 

‘Sure’ Sara replied with a gentle smile. ‘Thanks for asking.’

‘Caitlin not home yet?’

‘Not yet’ Sara murmured, her hand lightly caressing the stubble on Neal’s cheek. He grimaced in response, letting out an unconscious groan.

‘I see Daddy’s out like a light’ Hope commented with an amused grin.

‘He’s been going on all pistons for a few days. I guess it finally caught up to him’ Sara replied as Maria pulled out a frog from her pocket and let out a loud yelp. The two women glanced at the television screen and giggled softly; they’d both seen the movie dozens of times over the years.

‘We’re watching it upstairs’ Hope commented as Sara’s eyes were drawn to the marsupials on her daughter’s feet; they made her look like she was five-years-old again.

‘What’s Liam up to?’ Sara asked.

Hope frowned but her answer was noncommittal. ‘He’s upstairs on his computer.’

‘What?’ Sara asked, trying to understand what the frown had been about. 

‘He’s in a miserable mood. I think something happened with Cody last night.’

‘What makes you say that?’ Sara asked, leaning forward slightly.

‘Because he told me something happened with Cody last night.’

Sara rolled her eyes; her daughter’s acerbic sense of humour wasn't always what might be described as delightful. ‘Details’ she said, her lips pursed.

‘I don’t have any’ Hope admitted with a shrug. ‘I tried to get more out of him but… you know what he’s like when he decides to clam up.’

Sara nodded; of their two kids, Liam was definitely the strong, silent one. If he wasn't ready to open up, there was nothing you could do about it, short of putting a firecracker up his ass to get him to open up — and even then…

‘All right, well, get some sleep, honey’ Sara said. ‘And don’t forget, we said we’d hit the mall tomorrow.’

‘After my shift at the gallery’ Hope said as she gave her a thumbs up and turned to leave, practically tripping over her own two clumsy feet.

‘Goodnight’ she called out over her shoulder.

Neal stirred from his impromptu nap. ‘Babe…’ he muttered sleepily, squeezing her thigh. ‘What time is it?’ 

‘Just past eight’ Sara replied as she stroked his hair, pushing it off his forehead and leaning down to place a chaste kiss between his eyebrows.

He immediately grew quiet again and within seconds, she heard the soft rumbling of snoring as he pressed his stubbly cheek against her lap with a soft moan. 

Now, getting him off the couch and up to bed… that was going to be the real challenge.

WCWCWC

Liam sat up in bed, trying to concentrate on his computer screen, something that was easier said that done. Following the events of the previous night, he hadn't been able to get Cody out of his mind. He couldn't blame his ex for his seemingly over the top reaction. After all, Liam had been less than forthcoming about his budding relationship with Todd. He had to admit that if the roles had been reversed and Cody had been putting the moves on him while exchanging sexy texts with another guy, he wouldn't have been all that thrilled, either. 

The thing was, Liam wasn't at all sure how he felt about this new guy - certainly, he was enjoying the fun and games but if he was honest, it wasn't much more than that. Todd’s cute little habits were slowly becoming annoying - the way he showed up unexpectedly in Liam’s dorm room without calling ahead, how he could never take no for an answer, how he’d shown up twice at Liam’s basketball practices despite the fact Liam had deliberately asked him not to. The guy was really pushy and clingy and Liam longed for the good old days with Cody when things had been so uncomplicated. The two of them had been together so long, they could practically read each other’s minds and it felt so easy to be together, not work at all. Not like all the effort required dealing with this new relationship with Todd Greenway.

Liam slammed his computer shut in frustration, unable to concentrate. He turned over on his side and reached for the bedside lamp, shutting it off as he stretched out on the bed. By reflex, he reached for his phone, staring at the blank screen; it was beyond repair and the first order of business was to head out in the morning to get a new one. He lay there, his arms folded behind his head as he evaluated his options. 

He could reach out to Cody, try to make amends, attempt to better explain the nature of his relationship with Todd - a little more honestly, this time. He could go back to Syracuse and break it off with Todd and then, come home and try to start fresh with Cody. Or he could just leave things the hell alone, accept the way things were and get on with his sad, sorry life. The decision to go their separate ways had been arrived at mutually after a great deal of soul searching and none of the excellent reasons for breaking up had changed over the past four months. Was it fair to Cody to try to keep a long-distance relationship fresh and vibrant when they were miles apart and both too young to commit?

One thing was increasingly clear. He still loved Cody Miller and despite all the wonderful reasons they’d had for giving each other some space, he realized he didn't want that space anymore. He wanted the man back in his life and he needed to find a way to make that happen.

WCWCWC

‘You’re up bright and early’ Neal commented when he saw his son appear in the kitchen the next morning, showered and dressed.

‘I fell asleep early’ Liam said by way of explanation as he made his way over to the fridge.

He peeked inside, past the large number of containers of leftovers and grabbed for a jug of juice, setting it down on the table, next to his dad.

Neal had his computer open to his work e-mails and Liam glanced over his dad’s shoulder, peeking at the screen.

‘I thought the school was closed for the week’ he said, returning to the cupboard for a glass.

‘It is’ Neal said, closing the laptop and turning his full attention to his son. ‘But I’m behind with e-mails and the gallery re-opens this morning.’

‘You know, I’m more than happy to catch a bus back to Syracuse on Saturday. I really don’t need you driving all the way up there just for me.’

‘No, no!’ Neal said adamantly. ‘I want to. I’m looking forward to getting out of town for the day. Besides…’ he added with a smile, ‘…it’ll give us a chance to catch up. It’s been like party central around here for the past week, I feel like we haven't had the chance to just sit and talk. And I wanted to go to that Italian place near your campus… unless you have other plans.’

‘No, no other plans’ Liam murmured as he took a sip of juice. ‘Dinner at Caruso’s would be great.’

As every parent knew, spending time alone in a car with your kids was the absolute best way to get them to open up about what was on their mind. There you were, just the two of you, trapped for hours on end with no escape route. For any parent worth his salt, that was an absolute gold mine. Even a kid like Liam, who tended to keep things well under wraps, was unable to squirm out of answering questions when the long road stretched ahead for miles on end.

‘So, what are you up to today?’ Neal asked his son.

‘I need to go out and get a new phone’ Liam replied. ‘I… had an accident with mine the other night.’

Neal didn't ask for details; he’d dropped three phones in the toilet over the years and lost another two. He was in no position to comment.

‘Want some company? I need to pick up a new extension cord for my laptop’ he said, pointing to his computer. ‘I’m meeting Uncle Peter for lunch but that gives us all morning.’ 

Truth was, Neal was pretty sure he had an extra cord at work but it might be nice to spend a little time with Liam; he had a feeling something was up with his son.

‘Sure’ Liam said and if Neal wasn't mistaken, the young man looked relieved.

WCWCWC

Sara was enjoying the few days off work. Things were always intense at Sterling Bosch but they would be that way whether she took time off or not. Luckily, her right hand woman, Lydia Jordan, was headed back to the office to keep an eye on things until Sara returned next Monday. She settled on the couch with a second cup of coffee and the new bestseller she’d been wanting to read for weeks - not a work file or a recovery report, an honest to goodness novel from one of her favourite suspense authors.

Hope, Cam and Caitlin had all returned to work and Liam and Neal were out at the mall, leaving Raffie and his mistress with the run of the house. She’d barely gotten past the first chapter when the phone rang and the dog looked up at her with a quizzical look.  
‘Are you going to get that or shall I?’ he seemed to be asking as Sara got to her feet.

‘I’ll get it’ she told him, her eyebrows wagging.

‘Mindy! Hi!’ she said into the phone.

‘Hi Sara! I was just calling to say thanks again for the other night’ the woman said. ‘Mike and I had a great time.’

‘You’re welcome. It was great to see you guys’ Sara agreed.

As nice as this courtesy call was, Sara couldn't help but wonder what the real reason for the phone call might be. Surely Mindy Miller wasn't just phoning to say thank you - something she’d done profusely when she and Mike had left the Caffrey home two nights before. Luckily, she didn't have to wait terribly long. After a few benign niceties about how the Millers and Caffreys had spent their New Year’s Day, Mindy took a deep breath and plunged in.

‘So, how’s Liam?’ she asked, a little breathless.

‘Liam? What do you mean, how’s Liam?’

‘Nothing, it’s just… well, the truth is…’ she began, her voice dropping as if she were about to confide a deep, dark secret. ‘…Cody’s been upset since the other night and I overheard him on the phone this morning talking to one of his friends about what happened.’

‘You were eavesdropping on your grown son’s phone conversation?’ Sara said, her voice full of judgement.

She could almost hear Mindy Miller’s face redden across the line. 

‘I’ve been worried about him, so sue me’ the woman said with a tsk.

Sara certainly got it; far be it from her to admit it but she’d done her fair share of eavesdropping on her kids over the years - always with the best of intentions, of course.

‘So… what exactly happened the other night?’ she asked, her holier than thou attitude morphing into pure, unadulterated curiosity.

‘Apparently, some of the kids locked Liam and Cody in the basement over at Will’s place so they could talk things out. Everybody seems to think they made a big mistake going their separate ways.’

Sara listened with interest. ‘Oh yeah?’

‘I heard Cody say it was going fine… until Liam got a text from his boyfriend.’

‘Oh no!’ Sara replied. ‘You know, I get the distinct impression Liam’s not that much into this Todd guy but I think he might be feeling a little trapped.’

‘Well, Cody’s been moping around ever since, even though he hasn't come clean to me or his dad about why he’s in such a funk.’ She hesitated before going on. ‘Sara, I heard Cody say he thought he and Liam had made a big mistake by breaking up.’

‘Really? I get the same feeling from Liam’ Sara said. ‘But what can we do? They’re both grown men. We can’t start meddling in their lives.’

‘I guess… but…’ Mindy said, leaving the rest unsaid.

‘What are you saying?’ Sara asked, her brand new paperback novel completely forgotten for the moment.

‘Maybe they just need a little help’ came the reply.

WCWCWC

Neal took advantage of the silence in the car to broach a couple of touchy subjects - not touchy exactly, just topics he knew his son didn't open up about very easily. First off, he wanted to know why Liam had been so quiet since that New Year’s Eve party over at Will’s place. He suspected something had happened that night and he had a sneaking suspicion it had to do with Cody Miller. And then, there was the matter of the look in the young man’s eyes as he’d said goodbye to his grandmother the day before. It was time to delve into his quiet son’s psyche and get him open up.

‘I noticed what you slipped under Grandma’s pillow yesterday… when you were saying goodbye to her’ Neal said as the car made its way to their local Best Buy.

Liam gave his dad a sideways glance, slightly embarrassed. ‘You probably think it’s silly…’ he said. ‘…at my age.’

‘Of course I don’t’ Neal replied, thinking of the smooth pebble which had been Liam’s lucky charm since he was just a kid. 

It had started amongst the young boy’s massive collection of rocks and colourful pebbles he’d picked off the water’s edge by the Muskoka cottage they’d rented every summer while the kids were young. In time, Liam had divested himself of the collection, keeping this one single polished gem, a flat sandstone pebble which had become a lucky charm in pretty well all the meaningful moments of his son’s life. Neal recalled how Liam used to slip it into his tube socks at every one of his high school basketball games and how he tucked it in his pocket for safekeeping on test days; it had never let him down. 

When June had been on her deathbed, he’d watched in wonder as thirteen-year-old Liam had slipped it under her pillow in her hospital room to keep her safe on her long journey. Neal had been further astounded when the young man had confided that, although he knew June was dying, he’d just wanted his beloved godmother to have a peaceful voyage to the other side.

‘After I got shot, I remember finding it under my pillow in my hospital bed’ Neal recalled as the memories flooded back. ‘I know how much it means to you. Do you still tuck it into your sock during games?’

Liam grinned and shook his head. ‘No. I gave that up. I usually just keep it in my gym bag.’

‘Well, you don’t want to jinx things…’ Neal began.

‘I think Grandma needs it more than I do right now’ Liam said with a faraway look in his eyes.

Neal brought his hand to rest on Liam’s knee. ‘Unfortunately, I think she’s going to need more than a lucky pebble to get through this but… maybe it’ll help with a nice, peaceful transition.’

Liam grew quiet and finally looked over at his dad, seeing tears forming in the older man’s eyes.

‘That’s what I was hoping to do, Dad. Just help make things peaceful and serene for her… when the time comes’ Liam said quietly.

Neal just nodded, momentarily unable to speak.

‘I know this is hard on you, Dad’ Liam said, ‘…watching her slip away.’

There was an awkward silence while Neal recuperated. He coughed roughly.

‘So’ he finally said, finding his voice again. ‘Tell me about this new guy you’ve been dating. Is it serious?’

Liam sighed loudly. ‘I… I don’t think so. I think he’s more of a transition guy, if you know what I mean.’

Neal nodded; he’d had his share of rebound romances. For the longest time, he’d thought that was all Sara had been following Kate’s death. It was probably safe to assume, after almost thirty years in each other’s orbit, that what they had was more than just a passing thing.

‘Sometimes, we just need to step away from a situation to get a good look at it and realize what exactly we had in the first place’ he replied cryptically, giving a sideways glance in his son’s direction.

Liam didn't say much, he just let that sit for a minute. Neal figured he was on to something and just sat in silence, letting what he hoped were words of wisdom sink in. After a moment, he spoke up.

‘You never said, how did it go the other night? Over at Will’s place?’ Neal asked.

He wasn't sure how his dad did it, but he always seemed to be able to zero in on things, picking up on the subtlest of cues.

To the silence that followed, Neal added. ‘Did you run into Cody over there?’

He counted to five, then ten, the silence in the car deafening.

‘Dad’ Liam finally said, turning to look intently at his father. ‘I think I’ve made a terrible mistake.’

TBC


	11. Chapter 11

‘So, how’s your mom doing?’ Peter asked as the two men sat in Mel’s Diner, sipping coffee.

‘Awww, you know… pretty well the same’ Neal said, poking idly at his eggs benedict with his fork.

‘I thought you said she was getting better.’

‘She’s well enough to be out of the hospital but she’s getting weaker all the time’ Neal replied, sadness apparent in his eyes.

‘I’m sorry…’ Peter replied, searching Neal’s eyes.

Neal shrugged and looked up at his best friend, forcing a smile. ‘I’ve decided I’m going to try to focus on enjoying whatever time we have left’ he said stoically.

Peter nodded; he'd been there. Losing your mom at any age wasn't an easy thing. 

‘So’ Neal said, breaking the sombre mood. ‘You ready to head back to the Raphael tomorrow?’

‘Yeah, yeah’ Peter replied, avoiding Neal’s glare. 

‘You know, I don't know what I’d do without you, Peter. I really appreciate you taking over the day to day running of the gallery. I couldn't manage otherwise.’

Peter swallowed down his guilt. Soon, he’d have to tell Neal about his plans to retire but he wasn't quite ready to tell him the big news, at least not yet. ‘Did Hope say when they’d be leaving for Watertown?’

‘No, but I figure it’s sometime in the next couple of weeks’ Neal replied with a scowl. After a moment he continued. ‘I think they want to announce their wedding date to Cam’s parents in person.’

‘Oh yeah? How come?’

‘She didn't say, exactly… it’s just a feeling. When they got engaged, they had to tell Cam’s parents over the phone and I think it’s always been a sore spot with them… you know, the fact that they live so far away and we’re nearby. They always seem to get the news second hand’ Neal explained.

Peter nodded; he knew better than anyone that in-laws could be tricky. Heaven knows, he'd had to deal with his father-in-law’s strange idiosyncrasies up until the time the man had passed away the previous year.  
‘Well, don’t worry. I’ll make sure we’re fully staffed as soon as they tell me when they’re leaving’ Peter said with confidence. 

He’d been overseeing things at the gallery for a while now, what with Neal so focussed on the June Ellington School of Art. The thought of leaving all that behind tugged at his heartstrings.

He seemed to pick up on some broodiness on Neal’s part. ‘What’s the matter? Are you pissed off they’re doing it this way?’

‘What?’ Neal asked, puzzled. ‘No, no, of course not. It’s Caitlin… Sara and I have been worried about her lately. She hasn't been coping very well with all this stuff with my mom. She’s started acting out again.’

Peter had been watching from the sidelines as Neal and Sara navigated the force of nature that was Caitlin Somersby. She’d definitely put them through the ringer over the years. They'd done a terrific job but at a great cost; Neal wasn’t a young man anymore and these days, he seemed to be struggling with his own health issues.

‘What is it this time?’ he asked, as always the supportive friend.

‘Liam and I had to drive out to pick her up at some party last weekend. She was plastered…’ Neal said with a sigh. ‘Sometimes I wonder if I’m just banging my head against the wall. Maybe it’s time to cut our losses and ask her to move out…’

Peter’s hand was instantly on Neal’s arm. ‘You know you don't mean that.’

Peter had watched with interest as Caitlin had become a full-fledged member of the Caffrey family. Her behaviour had been challenging at times but the young woman had a good heart and an awful lot of talent - not unlike her foster dad. Fate was a fickle mistress and things had a tendency of coming back to bite you in the ass. Neal was having to face a situation not unlike the one he’d put Peter through all those years ago. Back then, the agent had looked the other way on countless occasions as Neal acted out, trying desperately to keep the younger man out of jail, despite himself. So many times, he’d wanted to give up on the ex-con, call it a day and let him fall flat on his face and live with the consequences of his actions. And yet, he’d never been able to let himself totally give up on him, choosing to wring his hands in quiet desperation and pull out his hair rather than send him back to the slammer.

‘Believe me’ he began, his face serious. ‘I’ve been there.’

Neal rolled his eyes; he knew all too well what his best friend was referring to.

‘Don’t give up on her, Neal. She’s come such a long way. Try to get her settled at university, give her a chance at a good future.’

‘It’s not just that’ Neal admitted broodingly. ‘Her behaviour has an impact on Hope and Liam too.’

‘What do you mean?’

‘The other day I walked in on Liam shouting at her for being such a screwup. He told her… he said he hated her.’

Peter listened, his eyes narrowing in response. ‘That doesn't sound like Liam’ he observed.

‘Tell me about it. I don’t want to jeopardize my relationship with one of my kids over this’ Neal continued, sadly.

Peter scoffed. ‘I hate to tell you this, Neal. But Caitlin is one of your kids.’

‘That’s what Sara said’ Neal replied with an acerbic laugh. 

‘Look, take it one day at a time’ Peter said, studying his best friend. 

Neal was looking a little forlorn, nowhere near his usual, optimistic self. ‘Is everything all right with those new meds you’ve been taking?’ Peter asked.

‘Yeah. Fine’ Neal replied curtly.

‘No more of those… you know, problems you’d been having?’ he asked, pointing in the general direction of Neal’s nether regions.

‘Peter!’ Neal clipped, looking surreptitiously around to see if anyone was listening to their conversation. He’d been the one to mention the nasty side effects of the previous medication on his libido but he didn't want his struggles in the bedroom to be broadcast for all to hear. 

‘No… it’s fine’ he conceded with a loud sigh.

‘Don’t you and Sara have a big anniversary coming up this summer?’ Peter asked, out of the blue, intent on cheering up his best friend.

‘Next year… twenty-five’ Neal said with a soft smile.

‘Why don’t you and Sara plan a trip somewhere? It’s been ages since the two of you have gotten away. These past few years, it’s been all about the kids, then there was the gallery and the art school. You’ve been putting in fifty, sixty hour weeks for years now. And Sara’s busier than ever over at Sterling Bosch.’

Neal listened and sighed; Hope had said the same thing just the other day.

Peter waited for Neal to reply. ‘And I hate to state the obvious buddy but… you’re not getting any younger’ he ventured to add.

‘Thank you, Peter!’ Neal said with a look of scorn.

‘It’s true. Life is short, Neal. You need to take advantage of every minute.’

‘What about you? Do you ever think about slowing down, maybe calling it quits?’ 

The question took Peter totally by surprise and he looked down at his plate, pretending to scoop up a bite of hash browns; he was nowhere near as skilled at skirting the truth as Neal was. Luckily for him, the man sitting across from him had a lot on his mind and didn't pick up on Peter’s hesitation. He shrugged and brought the forkful to his mouth, chewing and buying himself a few more seconds.

‘When is Liam going back to Syracuse?’ he asked, craftily changing the subject.

‘Saturday. I’m going to drive him up… take him out to dinner. Get him settled’ Neal replied. ‘He’s going through some stuff and I want to see if I can get him to open up about it.’

‘Oh yeah? What kind of stuff?’ Peter asked, picking up on the concern in Neal’s voice.

‘He’s just finding it tough to get over Cody. Seeing him again since he’s been home… it’s rattled his cage a little.’

‘I thought you said he had a new… boyfriend’ Peter said, hesitating on what word to use.

‘He does… sort of’ Neal said, taking a moment to sip his coffee. ‘But I think this new guy is just temporary. I’ll probably get to meet him this weekend. I’ll let you know.’

‘The course of true love, huh?’ Peter said with a gentle smile.

‘Never runs smoothly’ Neal replied.

‘So, what’s on the agenda for the rest of your holidays?’ Peter asked.

Neal looked at his best friend over the edge of his coffee cup. 

‘Besides driving Liam back to Syracuse? Mattress shopping’ he said with a definite lack of enthusiasm. ‘The last time we did that, Sara and I almost got a divorce.’

Peter laughed; Neal Caffrey shopping for a new mattress… now that was priceless. He wished he could be a fly on the wall.

WCWCWC

The trip home for the holidays had been bittersweet for Liam Caffrey. Of course, spending time with his folks and his sister was great as was catching up with his uncle Mozzie and all his high school buddies. It seemed that these days, with his other life in Syracuse, things had gotten a lot busier and his life had become more compartmentalized: there was Liam, the loving son and brother, Liam, the serious business student, Liam, the reluctant star basketball player, Liam, the friend to many and of course, Liam, Todd Greenway’s lover and Cody Miller’s ex.

The fiasco from two nights ago was still fresh in his mind and he wasn't sure how he felt about the way he and Cody had left things. Putting a little bit of physical distance between them was probably a good thing, considering what had transpired. Thoughts of Cody were always in the back of his mind but at least when he was at school, he was surrounded by distractions. He was beyond busy with basketball practices, classes, homework and his budding social life. Once home, it seemed that everything around him was a reminder of Cody Miller - all the places they’d hung out over the years, the things they’d done, the friends they’d shared, the places where they’d made out - including the bed on which he presently sat, staring down at the new phone in his hand.

He’d upgraded to a newer model and he glanced down at his long list of contacts - some of which he didn't need anymore. His eyes lingered on Cody’s name and contact information. Was there really any point in keeping it on his phone? It popped up whenever he scrolled down the list, a constant reminder of the choices he'd made and the life he’d left behind. In another twenty-four hours, he’d be heading back to his other life, four hours from here and a world away. His life as a student at Syracuse University seemed so removed from the life he’d lived in White Plains - bigger, more encompassing and he sighed loudly as he thought of what lay ahead.

There was Todd, of course. Liam was so conflicted when he thought of the buff young man who’d befriended him in his first year economics class. He’d flirted shamelessly with Liam and at first, hadn't seemed like his type - too talkative and too clingy. But Liam had been seduced by Todd Greenway’s outgoing personality and his spontaneous laugh - the fact the man was gorgeous as all hell didn't hurt either. Todd had gone after Liam aggressively and, still reeling from his breakup with Cody, Liam had been an easy target for the other man. He was living a new life, in a new city. Why not experiment a little, Liam had told himself. And experiment he had, thanks to the good looking young man with the sculptured abs and the perfect bubble butt.

He couldn't blame Todd for any of it; after all, he’d been a willing participant, happy to be shown the ropes by a very adventurous sexual partner. But it all felt so shallow, not really what he was looking for in life. That had become abundantly clear when he’d come face to face with Cody the other night and all those wonderful memories had come flooding back - the easygoing nature of their relationship, their shared memories as he’d come into his own as an out and proud gay man. Even though the thought of Todd and his buff body did things to Liam, his body’s reactions seemed limited to those body parts located below his belt buckle. There was none of the heart fluttering he’d experienced when Cody had touched his shoulder ever so briefly the other night. Cody was the total package - he was hot and smouldering yet sweet and caring whereas there wasn't much under the surface when it came to Todd Greenway.

Liam shook his head, his thoughts momentarily overwhelming him. Maybe he was overthinking this; after all, he was just a young gay man exploring the world. It was okay to give in to his baser instincts and explore his sexuality more fully; he was only eighteen years old for heaven’s sake, far too young to be thinking about a long term future with anyone.

The phone vibrated in his hand and his eyes grew wide as he stared down at the message from the last person on earth he expected to hear from.

‘Want to come over and talk?’ the text from Cody Miller read. 

WCWCWC

‘Wow! Randall Piper…’ Sara said into the phone. ‘I haven’t heard that name in ages.’

‘Well, he says he won’t deal with anyone but you’ Lydia replied. ‘So I thought I’d give you a heads up before you come back to the office on Monday.’

‘Yeah… yeah’ Sara said, a smile appearing on her lips. ‘This is definitely a big account.’

‘You think?’ Lydia replied sarcastically. ‘Mr. Bosch wanted me to give you a call right away. Actually, he was pushing for you to come in for a meeting today but Mr. Piper insisted next week would be fine.’

Mr. Piper… Sara mused. Back when she’d known the man, he’d been plain old Randy - in every sense of the word. She’d watched his meteoric rise from the sidelines over the years as he made his fortune in the high tech sector. Sara had followed his standing on the Forbes 500 list; the last time she’d checked, he was listed at number 112 with a fortune of over five billion dollars. Not bad for a guy who’d started out as a rather awkward computer geek. 

‘Did he say exactly what it is he wants us to insure?’ she asked, her heart beating just a little faster than normal.

‘Some art and apparently his wine collection’ Lydia replied. ‘So, you really know this guy personally?’

Sara smiled. ‘Oh, yeah…’ she said, not giving away just how intimately she knew Randy Piper.

‘Anyway, I booked him in for a meeting with you on Monday’ Lydia explained. ‘And the whole office is excited about seeing what he looks like in person. He’s kind of a hottie.’

Sara’s smile grew. She’d seen pictures in the paper as recently as the previous summer when the man had hosted a dinner party for Bill and Melinda Gates at his mansion on the Upper East Side - one of many properties he owned. She’d read how his third marriage had ended recently and pictures had shown a man who’d aged gracefully beaming back at the camera.

‘Yeah, that’s fine. Whatever…’ Sara said wistfully.

‘Are you going to tell me?’ Lydia asked with a giggle. ‘Exactly how well you know this man?’

Sara chuckled and shook her head as she sat on the couch in her modest family room, book in her lap.

‘Probably not’ she said with a laugh.

Liam appeared, a spring in his step. He pointed to his stocking feet, not wanting to interrupt her phone conversation, yet doing just that.

‘Look, I’ve got to go, Lydia. I’ll see you on Monday’ Sara said, sitting up to see what Liam wanted.

‘Sorry to interrupt, Mom. I’m kind of in a hurry. Have you seen my sneakers?’

‘Dad got mad this morning when he tripped over all the shoes by the front door and almost broke his neck. I heard him mumble something about throwing them in the garage.’

Liam nodded knowingly and turned on his heels.

‘Where you headed?’ Sara asked, getting to her feet. 

‘I’m…’ Liam began, stopping and turning to face her, unable to hide his excitement. ‘I’m going over to Cody’s place. He texted me and asked me to come over.’

Sara feigned surprise despite the fact she wasn't surprised in the least. ‘Oh, yeah?’ she said with a straight face.

Liam beamed and Sara stood, bringing her hand to rest on his arm. She hoped she wasn't an unwitting accomplice in bursting his balloon.

‘Honey’ she said. ‘Don’t get your hopes up too much.’

‘I won’t’ he replied but that huge smile still lingered on his lips.

He was gone in a flash, asking to borrow one of the cars and Sara stood there watching him leave, hoping he wasn't walking into more heartbreak. Liam might be quiet and unassuming but he was a sensitive soul and he hurt just like anybody else. He was barely out of the driveway when she picked up the phone and dialled.

‘Mindy?’ she said into the phone. ‘What did you do?’

WCWCWC

The gallery was quiet for a change, the perfect time to put up that new exhibit. Hope coached Cameron who was teetering on a step ladder, putting up a large canvas in the front room.

‘A little more to the right’ she called out as he adjusted accordingly.

‘No, the other way’ she responded to the adjustment he’d just made.

‘That would be left then’ he muttered under his breath.

She was disarmingly charming when it came to anything spatial and he grinned, carrying out the task without complaining.

‘Careful’ she called out unnecessarily as the phone rang.

‘Raphael Gallery, Hope Ellis-Caffrey speaking’ he heard her say.

Another few months and she would be adding ‘Armstrong’ to that name; he smiled at the realization.

‘Oh, yeah. Perfect. We’ll be by to pick those up. Thanks for calling’ Hope said, hanging up.

Cam looked over his shoulder, his face expectant. 

‘That was Janine from the travel agency. Our train tickets are ready to be picked up’ she said with a slight hop, just like an excited three year old.

They’d decided to take the train to Watertown. Cam’s old car was okay for puttering around the city but not very roadworthy and the last thing they wanted was their car breaking down in the middle of the interstate.

‘We’re going to have to let Mr. Burke and your dad know… ASAP’ he reminded her as he stepped off the ladder.

Hope inched over, bringing her arms around his waist and dropping her head against his chest.

‘I can’t wait to tell everyone. I’m about to burst.’

He laughed, bringing his arms around to hug her. ‘Just a few more months and we’ll finally be walking down the aisle.’

‘Yeah, now we have to resist the pressure to do anything we don't want to do’ she reminded him.

‘Your folks?’

‘No, my aunt Elizabeth. She’s going to want to turn this into the wedding of the year’ Hope explained as he nodded.

Cam brought his lips to rest on the top of her head. ‘You hold your ground, sweetie. Don’t let her talk you into anything you don’t want.’

‘Keep it simple, right? That’s what we agreed on’ she reminded him.

‘I’m good with whatever you want, babe’ he replied with a grin.

They were about to kiss when the sound of the door opened, followed by the familiar tinkle of the bell, announcing a visitor. 

WCWCWC

The drive over to the Millers was but a ten minute ride but it seemed to take forever. Liam’s mind was racing as he drove, taking him in all kinds of directions. He’d texted back a short message, not a message at all, really, just a smiley face before thinking better of it and punching in the words: ‘On my way’

He tried to steady his breathing; the fact that Cody wanted to talk could mean a lot of things. Maybe he just wanted to give him heck, something he hadn't had the chance to do at the party. After all, Liam had been less than forthcoming about his relationship with Todd Greenway and if Cody wanted to chew him out about his lack of transparency, he needed to be ready to listen. 

Or maybe Cody just didn't want to leave things without any resolution, considering Liam was headed back to Syracuse. After all, throughout their breakup as throughout their relationship, they’d always attempted to remain civil and friendly - no animosity, they’d agreed. 

Or maybe Cody wanted to profess his undying love for him and ask Liam to come back, tell him he couldn't bear to live his life without him…

Liam scoffed; now, he was getting just a little too carried away.

The Miller home beckoned in the distance and Liam slowed down, suddenly terrified about what awaited him. Regardless of what Cody had to say to him, he was planning on coming clean. He needed to let his ex know how he truly felt, apologize for his lack of transparency and tell him that, despite the fact that they’d mutually agreed on this course of action, he was now regretting the decision they’d made to go their separate ways. 

The rest would be up to Cody.  
WCWCWC

Cody appeared in the Miller kitchen, poking around while his mom looked on, uncharacteristically fidgety. 

‘Mom, have you seen my phone anywhere?’ Cody asked, looking around all the usual places. ‘I thought I had it upstairs but I can’t find it anywhere.’

Mindy pretended to help him look and went on the offensive - hoping to draw attention away from herself. ‘Honey, you're always looking for that thing.’

He glared at his mother. ‘No… I’m not actually. I’m sure I left it on the dresser in my room to recharge.’

She was starting to have qualms about what she’d done but soon, there would be no turning back. She’d been shocked to see that, within five seconds of the text she’d sent to Liam, the young man had replied. He was on his way over and she needed to get the hell out of the house before Cody figured out what she’d done.

‘Where’s your dad?’ she asked as she pretended to look for the phone she’d hidden between the cushions of the family room couch.

‘He’s in the basement, I think’ Cody replied, moving stuff around the kitchen counter on a frantic search for his phone.

‘Mike!’ Mindy called down to the basement. ‘We need to get going.’

She made her way to the front door and grabbed both her coat and her husband’s as Mike Miller appeared at the top of the basement stairs, looking confused - even more than he usually did.

‘What? Wh…where are we going?’ he asked, a screwdriver still in his hand. ‘I’m in the middle of fixing the washer.’

Mindy took his arm, grabbing for the screwdriver and placing it on the nearby table. ‘Remember, we wanted to see that… movie.’

‘Movie?’ he repeated with a frown. ‘What movie?’

‘Oh, Mike! Seriously, don’t you ever listen when I talk.’

The fact that he didn't always pay attention to his wife was not something he was terribly proud of. Instead of arguing, it was easier to play along - this he’d found out over their long marriage.

‘Yeah… yeah’ he muttered, taking the coat from Mindy’s hands and slipping it on.

Cody continued to poke around all the usual hiding places, looking for his phone. ‘What are you going to see?’ he asked absentmindedly.

To the silence, he continued. ‘Maybe I can come along.’

Mindy looked from her husband to her son, her face reddening as she tried to come up with an excuse to keep Cody from leaving the house. 

Just then, the doorbell rang and Mindy felt her heart start to thump in her chest. There was no turning back now. Whatever chain of events she’d set in motion could not be stopped and she and Mike needed to get the hell out of the way and let things play out - for better or for worse. She was the one to open the door, finding an excited looking Liam standing there in the cold with a goofy smile on his face.

He looked over Mindy Miller’s shoulder at Cody who stood there, shocked to find his ex on his doorstep. 

‘Hi!’ Liam said breathlessly as he held up his phone. ‘I got your text.’

TBC


	12. Chapter 12

Liam Caffrey was one smart dude. It took but one glance at his ex-boyfriend’s shocked features to realize that, somehow, he’d gotten the wrong end of the stick. Not surprisingly, the same look of consternation was apparent on Mike Miller’s face, accentuating the similarities between father and son - the same warm hazel eyes, the identical tilt of the head, the same tight lips as they both unwittingly fell prey to expert manipulator Mindy Miller.

Meanwhile, said woman was avoiding her son’s glare and forcefully dragging her husband towards the door despite the fact he still only had one arm in his coat.

‘We gotta go’ she exclaimed, pushing Mike past Liam who stood there, holding his phone in his hands. 

‘Bye!’ Mike called out over his shoulder, totally confused. 

It took but a second for the Millers to disappear from sight, leaving the two men staring at each other, Liam’s smile slowly morphing into the same look of bewilderment that was on Cody’s face.

‘Come on in’ Cody muttered, stepping aside.

‘Wh…what’s going on?’ Liam asked, stepping in from the cold.

Cody’s eyes narrowed at the unexpected sight of Liam standing there in his front hall. 

‘Do me a favour’ he said, his voice quiet. ‘Call my number.’

Liam frowned but did as he was told as Cody started to move around the main floor of the house, ears perked. The muffled sound of his ringing phone could be heard coming from somewhere in the family room and he followed it, moving cushions around until he finally came up with the phone, holding it up and glancing at his text messages.

‘You… didn't send that message, did you?’ Liam said as he began to clue in to what was going on.

Cody let out a loud sigh and shook his head. ‘No’ he said as he rolled his eyes. ‘Mindy Miller, busybody, strikes again.’

Liam let out a soft chuckle and Cody seemed to relax at the sight. ‘Well, you’re here now. You might as well come in and sit down.’

WCWCWC

Sara was sound asleep on the couch in the family room, her book still open on her lap when Neal finally made it home. Except for the weekend that stretched ahead, this was the last day of their extended Christmas holiday - a badly needed break for the two of them. It had been a busy two weeks, complete with holiday parties, family get-togethers and regular visits to Blue Skies - not much of a break as it turned out. To top it off, Neal was poised to drive Liam back to Syracuse the next day, returning Sunday morning, just in time to get back to the daily grind the next day. 

Sara had tried her best to remain focussed on her book — she really had. But following her brief phone conversation with Lydia Jordan, her mind had taken an unexpected detour down memory lane — back to her sophomore year at Brown University. It was the year before her parents had passed away and everything was going great for young Sara Ellis who had no idea just how painful her life was about to become. 

She recalled the first time she’d ever laid eyes on Randy Piper. She’d been hanging out at the coffee shop near the university campus with a couple of girlfriends when they’d spotted him, sitting at a table, eyes glued to his laptop, totally geeking out. He sat alone with nothing but an empty cup of coffee for company, sucking up the free internet connection like they all did back then. The three young women had giggled like a bunch of preteens at the sight of him - sort of a Clark Kent lookalike, handsome as all heck but with large, clunky glasses that masked his good looks. They’d taken bets as to who could make the best first impression and had proceeded to draw attention to themselves, giggling, talking loudly, locking eyes with him, all in an attempt to get him to glance their way. 

None of it had worked. 

Sara had finally decided to take the bull by the horns and had sauntered past his table, pretending to lose her footing and practically falling into his lap. That’s when she’d seen those dazzling blue eyes up close and lo and behold, an amused smile had appeared on his full lips. 

Thinking back, she realized she never would have been so bold if she hadn't been egged on by those two young women, neither of which she could remember by name. What followed was a slow burn building up to a torrid love affair as Sara and Randy proceeded to get to know each other rather intimately throughout her sophomore year. She’d been barely twenty-two at the time and he was two years her senior, poised to move on to graduate school somewhere on the west coast. They’d parted as friends, vowing to stay in touch, which neither one of them did, of course. That summer, while she worked as a barista in Providence, the devastating news had come that both her parents had perished in a car accident, turning her world upside down.

Randy had sent flowers to the funeral home but that was the last time Sara had ever heard from him. She’d followed his meteoric rise up the ladder of success, reading about his successful business endeavours and his failed marriages; nobody had it all, it seemed, even a man as charismatic as Randy Piper. He must have found out, somehow, that she was working at Sterling Bosch if he’d been asking for her by name. She was curious to find out how he’d sniffed out her trail after so many years. With that thought, her hand had slipped away from the book on her lap and she’d fallen into an uneasy sleep right there on the couch, dreaming of Superman and Lois Lane.

Neal looked down at his snoozing wife and grinned at the sight of her, her mouth half open and a gentle snore emanating from her lips. He leaned down and placed a soft kiss on her forehead as she opened her eyes and looked up at him with a look of confusion. 

‘You’re not going to be able to sleep tonight if you nap too long’ he commented, slipping in at the other end of the couch and propping her feet up onto his lap.

‘Oh, I’ll be able to sleep, believe me’ she countered, sitting up and curling up against him. ‘I don’t know why but I’m exhausted.’ 

Neal felt the welcome warmth of her body against his; he’d just begun to thaw after coming in from the cold and he was just working up the courage to head back out again.

‘I’m going to pop in on my mom before dinner’ he murmured as he gave her a gentle squeeze. ‘Do you want to come along?’

Sara opened her eyes again. ‘Hmmm?’ she said sleepily before taking in what he’d said. ‘Sorry honey. I promised Hope we’d go to the mall.’

She forced her eyes open and pulled away to get a better look at her husband.

‘How was brunch with Peter?’

‘Good… I think’ he added as a second thought. ‘Come to think of it, I did most of the talking.’

She chuckled. ‘So, what time are you leaving for Syracuse tomorrow?’ 

‘Depends on what time Liam is ready to go. Where is he, anyway?’

Sara cleared her throat and Neal got the feeling she was stalling. ‘He’s… over at Cody’s place’ she finally admitted. 

Neal’s eyes grew in surprise. Considering the conversation he’d had with his son that morning, that was the last place he expected him to be. He examined Sara’s face; she looked guilty as all hell. 

‘What did you do, Sara?’ he asked accusingly.

She got to her feet, setting her book aside and folding the blanket she’d been cuddling under, buying some time.

‘Sara?’ he repeated, a little louder this time. ‘What are you not telling me?’

‘Nothing’ she insisted, brushing him off with an eye roll and a firm head shake. 

‘So, are you sleeping over in Syracuse tomorrow night?’ she asked in an effort to change the subject.

Neal gave in to her poorly disguised attempt at redirection - at least momentarily. ‘Unless Liam wants to leave at the crack of dawn, I can’t see driving back until Sunday’ he commented. 

‘Awww, Neal’ she whined. ‘We said we’d go shopping for a new mattress before we went back to work on Monday.’

‘We could go next weekend’ he suggested, eager to put off the inevitable. ‘You know, there’s no rush, our bed is perfectly fine.’

Sara scowled at him, none too pleased with his take on the matter but relieved to have managed to steer the conversation away from Liam’s love life. Her small part in deceiving their son would thankfully remain a secret between her and Mindy Miller, at least for the time being. 

‘Neal, we’ve been through all this. Our mattress is fifteen years old’ she reminded him.

‘So?’ he replied with a pout. ‘I like our mattress…. we’ve made a lot of good memories on that thing.’

‘Well, we’ll make new ones’ she replied dismissively. ‘Honey, you were complaining about how it was giving you a sore back just last week. We are more than overdue for a new bed.’

Neal continued with the exaggerated pout but Sara was having none of it. 

‘Awww… Sara!’ he moaned, like a three year old who wasn't getting his way. 

‘You’re just going to have to suck it up, buttercup’ she said in that bossy pants voice of hers. ‘There are worse things in life than going shopping for a mattress.’

He pondered that for a moment - he couldn't think of a single thing that was more tedious than mattress shopping. He got to his feet and reached for his wife in a last ditch effort to get her to change her mind. His arms moved to envelop her, his mouth poised against her ear as he cooed. 

‘You know, babe, I’d be fine with whatever you want to pick out for us if you want to go shopping by yourself’ he murmured, using his sexiest, most persuasive voice.

She chuckled and shoved him away. ‘Nice try, Caffrey. There’s no way I’m choosing a mattress without both of us trying it out first. You’re going to be spending eight hours a night for the next ten years on that thing. It’s worth taking the time to make the right decision.’

Neal stepped away from her, his latest attempt seemingly up in smoke; no matter, he’d try his luck again later when she might be feeling more amenable to his suggestions. He refocussed and headed towards the kitchen, fishing around for the car keys.

‘I’ll be back for dinner’ he said petulantly.

He moved towards the front door, grabbing his coat and he looked over his shoulder as he called out. ‘And then you can tell me all about how you managed to get Liam over to Cody’s place.’ 

WCWCWC

‘So you’re telling me your mom was the one who sent the text?’ Liam asked as he sat across from Cody at the Millers’ kitchen table.

Cody shrugged and smiled shyly. Now that Liam was sitting there, across from him, things didn't seem so bad.

‘I’m sorry…’ Liam murmured. ‘Talk about getting our wires crossed.’

‘You couldn't have known’ Cody said, his face beginning to relax. ‘I guess I’ve been a little off since I saw you the other night. It’s just like my mom to stick her nose in and try to make things better.’

‘I hear you…’ Liam replied with a chuckle as he thought of his own mom’s propensity for budding into his life. He stopped, the echo of what Cody had just said ringing in his ears.

‘So… me being here… it makes things better?’ he asked tentatively.

Cody scoffed and shrugged. ‘Yeah… I suppose it does. We kinda left a lot of things unsaid the other night.’

He got to his feet and grabbed a couple of sodas from the fridge, not even bothering to ask what Liam wanted; he knew his preference in most things all too well. He returned to the table and put down the cans of pop, opening a ginger ale and handing it over as Liam smiled back at him.

‘Thanks’ he said, taking a sip. The tension between them seemed to diminish somewhat. It was time for Liam to say what he’d come to say.

‘Look, I’m going back to Syracuse tomorrow and I… well, I just didn't want to leave things like this between us. We’ve both been really good about, you know, keeping it real and… I’m sorry if I wasn't honest with you about everything the other night.’

Cody gave him a look that said ‘ya think?’ as Liam continued.

‘After we broke up and I left for school, I had to get used to everything all over again. New city, new school, new friends, new place to live. I was feeling overwhelmed at first. Basketball was really demanding and it felt like all I did was go to class, go to practice, come back to my dorm to work on assignments and… sleep.’

‘My roomie, his name is Josh… you’d really like him’ he said with a faraway look in his eyes as he thought of Josh Monteith, the young man who’d befriended him when he’d first arrived at Syracuse and who remained his closest friend to this day. 

‘He’s a gentle giant, six feet six… a really nice guy. He plays guard on the team and… I told him about me… you know about being gay.’

Cody frowned and listened. He’d always been much more open about his sexuality than his boyfriend had, although Liam had come a long way it that regard over the years. Liam was definitely more understated in his approach to life in general and he didn't go around making public declarations about his sexual orientation.

‘Not that I’ve been hiding it, exactly’ he quickly added. ‘I haven’t… it’s just, you know with basketball and all.’

Being a jock had only added to the complexity of the coming out process for Liam Caffrey. Unlike his dad and his sister, he wasn’t much into the theatre scene or the arts - the stereotype which was often associated with gay men. The world still expected gay men to look and act effeminate or to work as hair stylists or flight attendants and challenging those stereotypes wasn't easy. As a gay man playing on a sports team, especially a college team, Liam needed to find a way to challenge those stereotypes without ruffling too many feathers. Cody could only imagine how much more difficult it was for Liam to be off on his own in another city, trying to navigate such a tricky path while continuing to remain true to himself. 

‘But I don’t publicize it either and I try to be discreet’ Liam continued. ‘Anyway, it turns out Josh’s brother is gay and he’s been really supportive of me, trying to get me to relax and go out and have some fun.’

Liam looked up to check Cody’s reaction and all he saw was a gentle smile as the other man looked up at him. ‘Josh kept bugging me to go out with him and the guys, you know, blow off some steam and one Friday night, I went to a party off campus. There was this guy there from my economics class and he started hitting on me… I got pretty drunk and… I have to admit it was kind of nice to have someone look at me… that way.’

Cody listened, leaning in, no judgement on his face. Liam was a free agent after all and he couldn't begrudge him seeing others when he, himself, had done the same thing.

‘We started… dating’ Liam continued. ‘At first, it was pretty casual. Going out for a beer, to the movies… hooking up…’

He looked up again to see Cody’s reaction, surprised to see very little shock on his face.

‘I get it Liam. You’re not my boyfriend anymore’ Cody said, the first words he’d uttered since they’d sat down. ‘I didn't expect you to be living the life of a monk over there.’

‘It was weird at first’ Liam said with a nervous tittle. ‘Being with someone else but… to be honest, I… enjoyed the attention. Todd is… intense and…’ he let his voice trail, uncomfortable about giving too many details.

‘Anyway, I’ve been feeling unsure about our relationship the past few weeks because Todd’s become more and more clingy. He’s really out there, you know. Flamboyant, outspoken. He got me hooked up with the LGBT Resource Centre at the university which was great… It was good for a while but, like I said, he’s gotten pretty intense and lately, I’ve been realizing that’s not what I need right now. I need to stay focussed on school and he keeps popping in uninvited and even when I’m busy, he pushes his way in…’

‘The sex is good though?’ Cody asked with grin, unable to help himself. He wasn't sure he really wanted to know but he couldn't help but ask.

Liam chuckled, embarrassed and nodded, looking down at his drink.

‘Have you been safe?’ Cody asked. He’d always been an advocate for safe sex, something he’d preached when he’d headed the Gay Straight Alliance at White Plains High.

Liam rolled his eyes. ‘Yes, master. You taught me well.’

Cody let out a loud sigh and took a sip of his drink.

‘I’m happy for you Liam… if you’re happy’ Cody said with a shrug.

‘That’s just it’ Liam said, his hand reaching out to touch Cody’s. ‘I’m not sure I am.’

Cody’s eyes grew and he instinctively pulled his hand away, feeling uncomfortable with the physical contact. Truth was, if he didn't hold back, he might just take the other man in his arms and carry him up to his bedroom.

Liam misinterpreted the gesture and brought his hand to rest on his lap. ‘Sorry’ he mumbled.

‘Liam, why are you here? Really?’

‘Because… I can’t get you out of my mind even… when I’m with him, I’m thinking of you. I wish we hadn't broken up, Cody. I love you and being away from you hasn't changed that.’

Cody let out a quivering breath as he took in the look of despair in Liam’s eyes.

‘Sometimes I wonder too…’ he admitted with a shrug. ‘These guys I went out with… I called one of them Liam by mistake.’

Liam laughed out loud as he recalled how he’d done the exact same thing - calling out Cody’s name in a moment of heightened passion while he was with Todd. But there was no need to share those details.

Instead he looked at Cody. ‘How did you explain that one away?’ he asked with a grin.

‘You know, the usual… I apologized, said it was force of habit’ Cody said, matching his smile. ‘The guy took it pretty well but… well, he never called again.’

Liam nodded and grinned. ‘Do you… do you think maybe we could…’

Cody’s face grew serious. ‘Where are you at with this guy? Does he consider you… his boyfriend?’

‘Yeah… I suppose he does’ Liam admitted sheepishly. ‘He is… my boyfriend.’

Cody nodded and sighed again, even louder. ‘Well, I’m not one for stepping out and I know you’re not the type either.’ 

‘That’s true. But I’ve been wondering for a while now if I should break it off with him’ Liam said, his voice quiet.

‘But you haven’t’ Cody reminded him.

‘No. I haven’t’ Liam conceded, with regret.

Cody shrugged. ‘What do you want from me, Liam?’

‘Nothing… nothing. I… I just need you to know how I feel and I want to know how you feel… about us.’

‘There is no us’ Cody reminded him. ‘Are you asking me to be your bit on the side when you come into town? Because I’m telling you right now, that’s not going to happen.’

‘No! Of course not!’ Liam exclaimed, reaching out to touch Cody’s arm again.

They sat there for a moment, just looking at each other. Cody could feel the warmth of Liam’s hand against his skin, letting the touch linger this time, unable or unwilling to pull away.

‘Then what?’ he finally said.

Liam shrugged. He wasn't really sure what he wanted. He missed Cody and he wanted more than anything to get up and pull him into his arms, have Cody tell him he still loved him and have them go right back to the way things were. But he wasn't sure how he could make that happen, in light of his current situation. 

‘You need to figure things out for yourself before we do anything else’ Cody said, finally tugging his arm away, pulling away from temptation.

‘Would you… if I broke up with Todd, would you —’

Cody cut him off, seemingly annoyed. ‘What?’ he asked. ‘You want some sort of guarantee? Liam, it doesn't work that way.’

He seemed angry or at least miffed. Liam should really have thought things through before coming over. He liked Todd, enjoyed his time with him but their relationship paled in comparison to what he’d had with Cody or what they could have again if Cody decided he wanted him back.

‘I guess I just need to know how you feel about me’ Liam said, laying bare his insecurities.

‘I’m not going to start lusting for a guy who’s involved with someone else, Liam. I need to get on with my life’ Cody said, sidestepping the question.

‘But how do you feel… about me? Is it really over or… is there hope for us?’

Cody pushed his chair back and got to his feet; he hadn't been expecting to open up all those old wounds. It had taken him weeks to get to the point where he wasn't thinking about Liam every single minute of every single day. It had been a welcome relief to finally go out and enjoy someone’s company without wondering what his ex was up to, so many miles away. He wasn't at all sure he wanted that heartache and misery back in his life.

‘I don’t know’ Cody admitted with all the honesty he could muster. ‘It’s been rough… since you left.’

Liam joined him by the edge of the table, standing a mere inches from the man he loved. He could feel Cody’s breath against his face, the warmth of his body. He inhaled deeply, enjoying the familiar scent of his soap and looked up at Cody, his eyes locking with the other man’s. Cody took a step back, creating some space between them before speaking.

‘But it’s gotten better the last little while and I’m not sure I want to start pining for a guy who’s miles away.’

Cody’s reply hit Liam like a punch to the gut and his face grew sad. 

This time, it was Cody’s turn to reach out and he breached the distance between them, touching the other man’s arm, letting his hand slip down his arm until he was holding Liam’s hand. He squeezed it.

‘Liam, I’ll always love you but I don’t know if I can deal with knowing you’re so far away, seeing other guys’ he admitted.

‘It doesn't have to be like that. We could try, couldn't we?’ Liam pleaded, sounding a little too desperate.

He leaned in, bringing his hand to touch Cody’s cheek, feeling the familiar stubble. Unlike the other night, Cody pulled away this time, turning his head to the side to avoid Liam’s touch. The house grew eerily quiet.

‘Look, go back to Syracuse. Figure out what’s best for you, decide what you want to do… and maybe we can talk about it after… see how we’re both feeling.’

Liam swallowed, the rebuke stinging. There was a dim glimmer of hope but he’d been hoping for so much more when he’d seen Cody’s message appear on his phone screen. Obviously, he’d been expecting more than the other man could give, at least for the time being.

‘I just want you to remember, I love you Cody’ he whispered before stepping away and heading for the door.

What he didn’t hear was Cody’s soft voice once the door closed behind him. ‘I love you too’ the young man murmured under his breath.

WCWCWC

Neal sat on the edge of the bed, bouncing up and down playfully as he looked over at his wife.

‘Honey, this is a great mattress’ he exclaimed with an impish grin before sliding in between the sheets and curling up behind her.

He let out a soulful groan. ‘We made Liam on this bed’ he murmured softly into her ear.

She gave him a good natured shove with her bum. ‘We did not but nice try, Caffrey’ she said. ‘We’re going mattress shopping and that’s all there is to it.’

He let out a frustrated sigh. ‘Come on, babe… remember the last time we shopped for a bed, we argued for weeks. Too soft for you, too firm for me. You wanted queen, I wanted king…’ 

‘So we’ll argue, big deal’ she replied. ‘Since when has that been a problem?’

Neal brought his arms around her tighter, pulling her close, speaking softly in her ear.

‘I don’t want to argue, babe. Make love… not war’ he said, pulling the old saying out of the moth balls.

Sara giggled; he was so predictable. ‘You hate conflict, I get it but I’m not putting up with you complaining for the next ten years that the mattress is too soft or too firm or too lumpy or whatever else you decide is wrong with it.’

He groaned in response; it looked like there was no way to win this argument, no matter what he said.

Instead, he decided to change the subject. ‘Liam was awfully quiet at dinner’ he commented.

Sara turned to face him, preparing to confess. ‘Mindy tricked him into going over to their place.’

‘Tricked him?’ he repeated.

‘She sent a text from Cody’s phone, asking him to come over.’

‘You’re kidding!’ Neal said, eyes narrowing. ‘And you were in on this?’

Sara shrugged and pursed her lips. 

‘Sara, why do you always get involved in —’

‘I didn’t get involved, Neal’ she whined, cutting him off. ‘She just happened to mention that Cody seemed upset since he’d run into Liam the other night and I said Liam looked sad too and… well, the next thing I knew we were plotting to get them in the same room together to see if they could work things out.’

‘Honey, they didn’t just have a lover’s quarrel. They’re broken up’ Neal chastised. ‘And besides, their breakup was a mutual decision, remember.’

‘You said yourself that Liam was upset and I thought it couldn't hurt to give them a chance to talk things out’ Sara argued.

Neal pulled away and settled on his back, tucking his arm behind his head and staring up at the ceiling. ‘Liam’s been wondering if he should break up with this Todd guy’ he admitted.

‘What? Why didn't tell me?’ Sara exclaimed, getting up on one elbow and looking down at him.

‘Because he told me in confidence’ Neal murmured. ‘And need I remind you that Cody and Liam are both adults who can make up their own minds. We can’t keep micro managing their lives.’

‘Says the chief micro manager of the family’ she moaned with reproach.

He scoffed; he did have a tendency to be over involved in their kids’ lives, they both did.

‘Well, Liam and I are going to be trapped in the car for close to four hours tomorrow’ he reminded her. ‘It’s the perfect time to get him to open up.’

Sara glanced over at her husband warily. If anybody could get to the root of a problem, Neal was the man to do it. 

WCWCWC

A few feet away, Liam lay in bed, sleep eluding him as he replayed his earlier conversation with Cody. One thing was becoming increasingly clear - Todd Greenway was not the man for him and he needed to break it off before things got any more serious. Furthermore, if he went through with the breakup, he had to do it for the right reasons and not with the expectation that Cody would drop everything and come running back into his arms. As nice as it would be to go back in time and erase what had happened between them, their breakup was now a part of their joint history and nothing could change that. 

All that was left was to look ahead to the future and hope that somehow, Cody would be able to leave the past behind.

TBC


	13. Chapter 13

‘So, how did he take it?’ Elizabeth asked Peter that night as they prepared for bed.

‘How did who take what?’ he countered, seemingly preoccupied with removing his watch.

‘Peter! Seriously!’ El cried out.

Her frustrated tone of voice caught his attention and he turned to look at his wife.

‘Neal. How did he take it when you told him you’re retiring from the gallery?’ she asked.

Peter sprang up off the edge of the bed and walked over to stand in front of the dresser, pretending to fiddle with something, intent on avoiding Elizabeth’s probing gaze. 

‘I… didn’t tell him yet’ he muttered.

‘Peter! He’s going to need some lead time to get organized. You need to tell him.’

He finally turned to face her, standing at the foot of the bed. ‘Honey, I told you. There’s a lot going on. Hope and Cam are planning a trip upstate to visit Cam’s parents and Neal is… he’s struggling with some health stuff’ he explained with as much earnestness as he could muster.

He was stretching the truth like an old, used up elastic band - but he seemed to be hitting the mark, appealing to her sense of compassion.

‘Oh no… What’s going on?’

‘It’s just… his blood pressure, the doctor is trying to get it under control. And his mom is really not doing well. And then there’s Caitlin, she’s been giving them a hard time again.’

It was all true but none of it was the actual reason he’d held off telling Neal about his plans to retire. The truth was, the minute he uttered the words, there would be no turning back and it would set things in motion… things he’d rather not think about just yet. 

‘El, I can’t just leave him in a lurch, not when there’s so much going on’ Peter argued, moving to join her on the bed.

‘Of course not’ she said, trying her best to be understanding. 

She fiddled with the sheet, smoothing it down over her lap. ‘When do you think you should bring it up?’

‘I don’t know, El’ Peter replied curtly. ‘The kids are leaving the week after next and then Hope’s having that one last surgery at some point…’

‘Yeah, but that’s just the classes. You can’t do those for her anyway’ she argued. 

She was right, of course. He wouldn't be the one teaching the art classes when Hope took time off to have that last cosmetic surgery. But Cam would no doubt be wanting a little time off to be with her and the truth was, he couldn't imagine walking away when there was so much going on.

‘Honey, we said by summer… at the latest’ she reminded him. 

‘I know, El, I know’ he said, slipping in between the sheets. ‘And it’ll happen. But that’s still months away. Just… let me find the right time to tell Neal, all right? You’re gonna have to trust me on this.’

She sighed and brought her head to rest against his shoulder. ‘Honey, there’ll always be something going on. Don’t let what’s happening at the gallery highjack our dreams.’

He patted her hand and took a deep breath. This might be her dream but was it his, too?

WCWCWC

Saturday morning brought emotions bubbling to surface in the Caffrey household as the women prepared to send Liam on his way.

‘Be good, squirt’ Hope said, hugging her brother. ‘Let me know how… everything works out.’

Sara frowned; obviously, Liam had been confiding in his sister about something. Whether it was about his relationship with Todd Greenway or something else; she’d have to dig a little deeper to find out.

‘Bye Mom’ Liam said, turning towards Sara and opening up his arms to her.

Sara stepped into his embrace, hugging him tightly and hanging on for an extra few seconds as she felt the emotion rising in her chest. After a moment, he pulled out of her arms, noticing her eyes brimming with tears. 

‘Mom… don’t cry’ he pleaded with a playful pout, hoping to break the sombre mood. ‘I’ll be back before you know it. Easter weekend, at the latest.’ 

It was small comfort - Easter seemed like eons away right about now. 

At six foot two, Liam towered over his mom, especially in the absence of her signature four inch heels. She stood barefoot in their kitchen, pulling her robe snugly around her as she looked up at her baby boy and sniffled. She wiped her nose just as Neal reappeared from having put Liam’s stuff in the car. Seeing his wife in this state was nothing new; it had been the same scenario every single time Hope had left for Carnegie Mellon - tears and plenty of hand wringing.

‘You ready to hit the road, sport?’ Neal asked, patting his son on the back.

‘Yeah, yeah…’ Liam muttered, eyes still glued to his mom’s face. ‘I love you, Mom’ he added before turning away.

Neal leaned in to kiss his wife on the cheek; if he tried to comfort her any more than that, she’d just become even more distraught and he didn't want to have to deal with a blubbering Sara Ellis moments before having to hit the road. He knew she needed to have her little pity party and there was nothing he could say or do that would keep it from happening.

‘I’ll call when we get there, okay?’ he whispered. ‘Try not to worry.’

She nodded, swallowing down her tears. 

‘Bye sweet pea’ he called out to Hope who’d moved in to put her arm around her mom’s shoulder.

‘Safe trip guys’ Hope called out.

The door closed behind the two men and Sara turned towards Hope, breaking down and letting the tears flow freely.

‘Awww, Mom. He’ll be back before you know it’ she said in an attempt to reassure her.

‘I know’ Sara blubbered against her daughter’s shoulder. 

‘Come on. Why don't you go get dressed and I’ll take you out for breakfast. My treat’ Hope said, taking control of the situation. ‘We can carb out.’

Sara smiled at her girl through the tears; having her daughter reassure her instead of the other way around seemed strange but was nonetheless comforting. And just what she needed. 

Apparently, they’d come full circle. 

And carbing out seemed like just the thing to chase the blues away.

WCWCWC

Peter was pleasantly surprised when he heard Clinton Jones’ voice on the other end of the line on Saturday afternoon. After the usual exchange of niceties, the special agent finally came to the purpose of his call. He was baffled by a case that had been lingering on his desk for the past few months. The owner of a high end gallery in the garment district was convinced one of the paintings he’d recently acquired had been switched out for a forgery and he was looking to the Bureau to help him prove it. 

‘Do you think you could give me a hand with this one?’ the agent asked tentatively.

Peter beamed, he loved it when Jones reached out to him for his wisdom and know how - something that was growing increasingly rare as the years passed. 

‘Sure!’ Peter enthused. ‘How about I pop by next week and you can fill me in on the details?’

‘That sounds great Peter and…’ Clinton hesitated before going on. ‘… do you think you could bring Caffrey along? This is kind of his area of expertise.’

Peter rolled his eyes but was quick to respond nonetheless; he should have guessed what was really needed was Neal’s keen eye and his acute sense of observation. 

‘Sure… sure. I’ll see what I can do’ Peter said before hanging up.

‘See what you can do about what?’ came El’s voice from the kitchen.

‘That was Clinton. He needs to pick my brain about a case he’s working.’

Elizabeth walked into the dining room, carrying some plates and cutlery. She gave her husband a frown as she prepared to set the table. 

‘Oh, honey, don’t go getting yourself involved in something else’ she chastised. 

Peter scowled right back; he might have retired from the Bureau but he still had a lot to offer. It was always nice when Jones called to get his advice, made him feel like he still had something to contribute. 

‘El, it’s fine. He just wants to talk to me.’

‘But you have a lot on your plate with the gallery. Didn't you say you had a new exhibit coming in next week.’

Peter stepped closer and kissed the tip of her nose in the hopes of toning down the drama. 

‘It’s fine’ he said reassuringly. ‘Cameron can take care of things at the gallery. And besides, it’s just a consult… for now. I’m not going undercover or anything.’

Elizabeth pouted a little but let it go; Peter had that look of determination in his eyes that she knew all too well. She returned to the kitchen and Peter watched her leave, rubbing his hands in glee.

There was nothing like a good juicy case to get the blood flowing.

WCWCWC

Winter driving was always a hit and miss proposition, especially in early January in New York where things could go awry in the blink of an eye. But this time around, Neal was pleased to find that they had lucked out in the weather department. You just never knew if and when a major snowstorm was going to hit, putting travel plans in peril but there was no major precipitation in the forecast for the next few days, portending an easy drive up to Syracuse and back.

Father and son alternated between chatting and listening to music, taking turns plugging their individual iPods into the car’s console - alternating between Liam’s taste for jazz and contemporary music and his dad’s predilection for show tunes and Motown. They were surprised to find some commonalities on their playlists: Bruno Mars, Jill Scott, Oscar Peterson, Ella Fitzgerald. Among other more obvious things, Liam seemed to have inherited his dad’s eclectic taste in music.

Al Green came on Liam’s iPod and Neal gave Liam a look of surprise as he heard the song that he and Sara had adopted as ‘their’ song, the one they’d played at their wedding and that they danced to every year on their anniversary.

‘What are you doing with that?’ Neal asked, glancing over at his son with a puzzled look.

Liam shrugged, seemingly embarrassed. ‘It reminds me of you and mom’ he admitted. ‘Besides, I like it.’ 

Neal nodded and hummed along to the words, his mind floating back to the twenty-four times he and Sara had danced to the tune - not counting all the times he made a grab for her when it randomly came on the radio in their kitchen or wherever they happened to be. He remembered the one time they’d been dining at the Burkes and it had come up on Spotify. He’d gotten up in the middle of the meal, putting out his hand for Sara and waltzing her around the Burke dining room as Peter and Elizabeth watched and laughed.

‘Is she going to be like that every single time I leave?’ Liam asked, seemingly out of the blue.

‘Probably’ Neal chuckled. ‘When Hope was away in Pittsburgh, she’d have herself a little pity party every single time she left to go back to school. It only lasts a little while and the solution usually revolves around me giving her a little space followed by a lot of Ben and Jerry’s. I’ve gotten in the habit of stocking some in the freezer just in case the mood hits.’

Liam laughed as he imagined the hyper-disciplined Sara Ellis giving in to her obsession for ice cream. 

‘I hate seeing Mom cry’ he said after a moment or two.

‘She loves you… and even though she’s happy for you, she misses having you around the house’ Neal attempted by way of explanation.

‘But she’s got her own life. She’s busy at work and she’s got you’ Liam commented.

Neal smiled. ‘Maybe someday you’ll have kids of your own’ he said as Liam scoffed. ‘Then, you’ll see what it’s like. Even though you and Hope are out in the world, living your lives, your mom and I are always worrying about you… wanting to make sure you’re safe. And happy.’

Liam stared out the window, growing silent as the music played on.

‘So, things didn't go all that well over at Cody’s place yesterday, huh?’ Neal asked.

‘Who told you I was over at Cody’s place?’ Liam asked with a frown.

Neal looked over, eyebrows arched. ‘Our house has more leaks that the White House’ he said with a grin.

Liam shook his head, sadly. ‘I was going to leave it alone like we talked about but then, I got a text from Cody asking me to come over.’

‘Oh yeah?’ Neal said, pretending to be surprised. Sara’s confession in bed the night before had laid it all out for him. In great detail.

‘That was nice of him’ he added.

‘Well, it wasn't him, after all. His mom highjacked his phone and sent the text to lure me over to their place.’

‘Lure you over? That sounds diabolical.’

‘You know what I mean. I guess Cody had been moping around since I saw him over at Will’s the other night and his mom thought we should clear the air before I left town.’

Neal just looked out at the road ahead and surreptitiously turned the volume down from the control on the steering wheel. He didn't want to miss a single word.

‘You should have seen Cody’s face when I got there. He looked like a deer caught in the headlights’ Liam continued. ‘His mom dragged his dad out of there so fast, you’d think they were escaping a burning building.’

Neal smiled and stared ahead.

‘But anyway, he invited me in and I told him…’

Neal waited for the rest which didn't take long in coming. Liam was on a roll and he wasn't about to interrupt him now. 

‘… I told him all about Todd. How we met and how we’ve been seeing each other for a couple of months. The other night, over at Will’s place, I’d kind of… well, I’d been a little sketchy on the details. I didn't want him to know how serious things have become between Todd and me.’

The sound of Liam’s phone was heard chirping over the music and he looked down at the incoming text, letting out a sigh.

‘Todd?’ Neal asked.

Liam exhaled and punched in a short response. ‘He’s been texting me all morning. Can’t wait to see me… blah blah blah.’

‘Doesn’t sound like you’re quite as eager to see him.’

‘That’s ‘cause I’m not’ Liam admitted. 

‘So, how did Cody react when you told him things with Todd were more serious than you’d first let on?’ Neal asked, trying to put the conversation back on track.

‘He was pretty chill about it but… at first, I think he thought I wanted to… you know, have something going with him and still keep seeing Todd.’

‘That’s not what you want?’ Neal prodded.

‘No!’ Liam replied loudly. ‘I told you the other day, I wanted to talk to Cody about getting back together.’

‘Did you tell him that?’

‘Yeah, sort of. He said he wasn't interested in being a… a bit on the side’ Liam mumbled, seemingly uncomfortable with what he was sharing.

He turned sideways to look at his dad. ‘But that’s not what I want, Dad. I want to know if we can go back to the way things were.’

‘Is that what Cody wants too?’

Liam settled back in his seat, looking out at the wintry scene outside the car window.

‘I’m not sure… but he wouldn’t commit either way. He said I needed to decide what I wanted to do about Todd before we talk about doing anything else.’

‘So, now you’re wondering if you should give Todd up if there’s nothing to give him up for?’

Liam shrugged. ‘Todd’s not the right guy for me, I know that’ he admitted. ‘But… Dad, it’s lonely at university sometimes. All I do is study and go to practice. If it wasn't for Todd, I wouldn’t be having any fun. At least I have someone to hang with, go to movies, have dinner… you know.’

Neal nodded. ‘So it’s kind of a one bird in the hand, two in the bush thing?’

It sounded so crass when you looked at it that way and Liam frowned. ‘I guess… not so cool, huh?’ he asked, after a moment.

‘That depends’ Neal said thoughtfully. ‘It depends on what you want. If you want to have an exclusive relationship with Cody, that’s one thing but if you just want to have a little fun… You know, Liam, there’s no harm in dating different guys and taking the time to figure out what it is you want.’

‘But I don't think that’s what I want’ Liam said, his voice quiet.

‘Liam, you’re eighteen years old. I’m not advocating you go out and sleep with every guy you meet but you’re young and it’s okay to… play the field.’

‘What were you doing when you were my age?’

Neal scoffed and shook his head. ‘Believe me, buddy. You don’t want to follow in my footsteps.’

‘Tell me’ Liam said. ‘I want to know.’

Neal hesitated; he always did when he was called upon to share details about his indiscriminate youth with one of his kids. He wasn't ashamed exactly but he certainly wasn't proud of some of the poor choices he'd made and where they'd led him.

‘I told you… I came to New York when I was eighteen. I needed to get out of St. Louis. Away from home’ he said with sadness in his voice.

‘Was it that bad?’

Neal looked over at his son and sighed. ‘Grandma wasn't the woman she is today. She was a very… sad and angry woman and she was so miserable that she didn't have any interest in me or my life. So I just cut loose and took off.’

‘Where you scared?’

‘Scared? No, I wasn't scared. I was excited to see what the world had to offer. In hindsight, it might have served me better if I had been a little scared. Maybe if I’d known what was ahead, I would have. But I met uncle Mozzie and… things just went from there.’

‘That woman you told me about, the one you fell in love with’ Liam said.

‘Kate?’ Neal said, glancing to his right as Liam nodded.

‘I met Kate a couple of months after I got to New York and I was totally smitten with her’ he admitted with a smirk. 

‘Did you date a lot of women back then?’

‘I’ve always been more of a one woman man, I guess. But after Kate… after she died, I kind of played the field for a while…’ he admitted.

He got a sparkle in his eye. ‘Until I met your mom, that is.’

‘How do you know? How do you know when it’s the real thing, when it’s time to settle down and make a commitment to someone?’

Neal chuckled. ‘If I knew the answer to that, I’d write a book and make a fortune’ he said. ‘You never know, not for sure. It’s all about deciding what you want out of life and then taking a leap of faith.’

‘So how did you end up making a commitment to Mom?’

‘The truth?’ Neal said with an eyebrow wag.

Liam nodded.

‘I don’t know if I ever would have settled down but… your mom got pregnant. I got your mom pregnant’ he corrected, wanting to take his share of the responsibility for what had happened. ‘And everything changed after that. I couldn't imagine walking away from an innocent little baby that I’d helped create and it pushed me to really look at how I felt about your mother and what I wanted to do with my life.’

‘But you love Mom’ Liam said.

‘Of course I love your mom. More than I ever thought possible. But sometimes, life conspires to throw things right in our face when you’re too stupid to see them for yourself. Sometimes, you need a little push in the right direction.’

Liam listened, letting things settle and imaging his life with or without Cody.

‘Well, I’m not going to get Cody pregnant’ he said with a grin. ‘So I’m going to have to look for some other sign from the heavens.’

Neal laughed and brought his hand up to rest on his son’s shoulder. ‘Don’t be so hard on yourself, kiddo. Just do what feels right, trust your instincts and things will all work out for the best.’

WCWCWC

‘Why don’t you just get one of those fancy beds that has two controls?’ Hope said as she took a huge bite of pancake and washed it down with a sip of coffee.

‘Daddy says he doesn't like those because they have a separation down the middle and it’s like two single beds’ Sara replied.

‘What? That makes no sense whatsoever’ Hope replied with a shake of her head.

‘Tell that to your dad. He says he doesn't want anything between us in bed - not even a small crack in the mattress’ Sara said with an eye roll and a girlish giggle.

‘God! Dad is such a…’

‘Romantic?’ Sara offered.

‘No… an idiot’ Hope replied with a laugh.

Sara joined in; she’d read how shopping for a mattress could be the cause of friction between couples. It had been fifteen years since the last time they’d purchased a bed and she had totally forgotten how much she and Neal had argued the last time. 

‘Your dad is funny that way. For all his adventurous streak, he’s a creature of habit and he just wants things to stay as they are.’

‘But it’s so simple, if you get one of those adjustable beds, you could each get the firmness you want and neither one of you would have to compromise.’

Sara smiled and looked at her no-nonsense daughter, so much like herself in that respect. ‘That’s too easy, honey’ she said. ‘What about you and Cam? What kind of things do the two of you argue about?’

Hope shrugged and thought about it for a moment. ‘Not a whole lot. He’s very accommodating. He worries about his folks, though.’

‘What do you mean, his folks?’

‘Well, they’re pretty religious and… it just brings up some… issues’ Hope said evasively.

Sara’s eyes sparkled. ‘Does that mean you’ve set a wedding date?’ she asked, leaning forward.

‘Don’t ask me that, Mom!’ Hope said with a frown. ‘You’ve got to let us do things in our own time.’

Sara fell back in her seat, shoulders slumped.

‘Don’t be like that, Mom. I have to take into consideration Cam’s wishes and… the wishes of his family.’ 

‘So that’s why you’re driving up to Watertown, to tell them about your wedding plans?’

‘When we got engaged, Cam ended up telling them over the phone and… I think it hurt their feelings. We were here and you guys got to see everything up close, the ring, the whole thing.’

Sara thought back to that night and how their joy had been short lived. Twenty-four hours later, Hope was lying in intensive care, fighting for her life.

‘He’s the first one to get married in his family and it’s a big deal for the Armstrongs’ she reminded her mom.

Sara nodded and reached out to touch her daughter’s hand. ‘I get it, honey. It’s okay. Whatever the two of you decide, Daddy and I are on board.’

They returned to their meals briefly and Sara looked up. ‘So…over the next few months, then?’ she couldn't help but ask.

‘MOM!’ Hope replied with a head shake.

WCWCWC

It was almost dinnertime by the time Neal and Liam finally arrived on the campus of Syracuse University. They’d taken their sweet time on the drive up, stopping for lunch at a quaint little restaurant they’d discovered the previous fall when Liam had first moved upstate. If he’d pushed it, Neal could probably have hoofed it back home to sleep in his own bed but the truth was, he was in no hurry to make it back to White Plains, knowing his wife was poised to drag him out mattress shopping the moment he set foot in the door. Avoidance was always so much better than confrontation.

Besides, he enjoyed having Liam all to himself, sharing ‘guy stuff’ with him, away from the hustle and bustle of life at home. Right after five o’clock, the car pulled into the parking lot of Booth Hall, one of the residences on the east fringe of campus and Neal grabbed for a few of Liam’s bags, heading for the door.

‘I’ll be right up’ Liam called out as he threw his dad his room key and began to poke around the trunk of the car for the rest of his stuff.

Neal entered the residence and strolled over to the elevator and up to the fourth floor, making his way up the quiet hallway. He passed a common room where a couple of kids were sitting around chatting and proceeded towards Liam’s dorm room, lugging his backpack and the cooler in which he’d packed some special treats for his son - including some of his favourite desserts left over from New Year’s. 

Coming up the long, narrow hallway, Neal immediately spotted a very colourful young man leaning against the wall directly across from Liam’s room. Upon examination, he could see that the guy was about Liam’s height and very sturdy looking. He wore a pink sleeveless muscle shirt and a pair of tight bicycling shorts and his feet were clad in a pair of slip ons - the kind you wear when you step out of the pool. The guy was built like a body builder, his strapping arms fully on display as he fiddled with what looked to be a phone in his hands. Neal kept his eyes glued on the man as he got closer, assessing him, knowing without the shadow of a doubt that he was looking at Todd Greenway, Liam’s main squeeze. 

Liam had mentioned that the guy was flamboyant and that much was obvious; his blond hair was spiked and laced with pink highlights and he stood provocatively with one foot leaning up behind him, against the wall. Neal frowned as he tried to imagine his rather reserved son on the arm of such a colourful guy.

The sound of Neal’s footsteps got the young man’s attention and he glanced up with a flirty smile as he spotted the older man coming down the hall towards him, dragging along a large cooler.

‘You must be Liam’s dad’ he said, jumping out in front of Neal and blocking his way like an excited three-year-old.

Neal set down the bags and put out his hand. ‘And you must be Todd.’

‘Guilty’ the man said with a wide grin. ‘I couldn't wait to meet you. Liam said you were coming.’

Neal nodded and fished around for the key to Liam’s room as Todd hovered behind him, waiting for the door to open.

‘Where is my…’ he hesitated for a moment. ‘Liam?’ 

Neal stifled a smile; this guy was really over the top and oh so different from Cody - or Liam, for that matter. What was it they said about opposites attracting?

‘He’ll be right up. He’s just getting a few things out of the car.’

‘I got back from Denver on Thursday and I couldn’t wait for Liam to get back’ he said with a pronounced southern drawl as he followed Neal into the room without waiting for an invitation. 

He plunked himself on the edge of Liam’s bed with an exaggerated sigh and looked Neal up and down, admiring his physique — apparently.

‘Now I see where Liam gets that strong jawline’ he said, batting his eyelashes playfully although his eyes seemed to be checking out Neal’s butt.

Neal smiled politely. ‘The Caffrey curse’ he said with a grin, pointing to his chin.

‘That’s no curse, sweetheart’ the man said. ‘That’s a blessing.’

The door to the room swung open and in waltzed Liam, his jaw dropping at the sight of Todd Greenway sitting there in all his splendour.

‘Todd!’ he shouted, obviously taken by surprise. ‘I thought we said we’d meet up tomorrow.’

The young man was instantly on his feet, his arms wound around Liam’s neck as Neal watched, his eyes growing in surprise. 

One look at Liam and Neal could see his son was far from amused at having been ambushed. 

‘I couldn't wait to see you’ Todd said unapologetically, looking at Liam then back at Neal. ‘You didn't tell me your dad was such a hottie.’

Liam was beyond mortified. Having your parents referred to in any sexual way was… well, it was just… wrong and he pulled away from Todd and gave him a stern look.

‘Ewww Todd, that’s gross’ he said without hesitation.

Neal chuckled in an attempt to break the tension, not that Todd seemed to notice. He was too excited to see his boyfriend finally returning after a long two week absence.

‘So, what’s the plan?’ he said, hopping around. ‘Are you guys hungry?’

Neal glanced at Liam, unsure what to say. ‘We were… thinking of going to Caruso’s for a bite to eat.’

‘Oh I looooove Caruso’s’ Todd exclaimed as Liam stared at Neal, telegraphing his frustration. ‘They make the best garlic cheese bread.’

‘Yeah… Todd’ Liam began with trepidation. ‘Not tonight, okay? I have stuff I need to discuss with my dad. You know… family stuff’ he said looking at Neal for some help in getting out of the conundrum he found himself in.

Neal nodded adamantly. ‘That’s right’ he said, coming to his son’s rescue. ‘We have to discuss that… that situation with… you know…’ he said in mock seriousness.

Liam rolled his eyes; it seemed his dad was having fun at his expense. He reached over and took Todd’s arm, ushering him towards the door.

‘But why don’t I call you in the morning after my dad leaves and we can… maybe we can get together for coffee’ Liam suggested.

‘Coffee, huh?’ Todd said with a lewd wag of his eyebrows. ‘Sure, we can have coffee.’

They got to the door and Todd stopped dead in his tracks, ostensibly hoping for some brief gesture of affection from the man he’d been waiting days to reunite with. Liam pushed him out the door and craned his neck out into the hallway to say goodbye. Neal could just about make out the profile of the two men, watching as Todd took advantage of the situation and placed a juicy kiss on Liam’s lips. Liam squirmed, visibly embarrassed.

After what seemed like forever, the door closed behind Todd and Liam turned around to look at his dad, a look of terror on his face.

‘DON’T!’ he said as Neal chuckled.

He raised a finger and wagged it in his dad’s face. ‘Don’t say it!’

TBC


	14. Chapter 14

‘Liam! Liam!’

Neal loomed over the bed, fully dressed, his hair perfectly coiffed, staring down at his son.

‘Wh — what?’ Liam croaked, opening one eye and grimacing.

‘It’s going on ten o’clock and I’m going to need to head out soon’ Neal explained, taking a seat on the edge of the bed next to him.

Liam turned over to face his dad, squinting as the bright sunlight came streaming through the hotel room window, rudely interrupting his beauty sleep.

‘What?’ Liam repeated, trying to figure out where he was and what his dad was saying.

‘You were restless all night’ Neal said, getting to his feet and hovering over him. ‘Did you want to grab a bite to eat before I go?’

Liam groaned, pulling the pillow over his head and Neal grinned at the sight of him; his son had never been what you’d call a morning person.

He returned to the other bed and finished putting his toiletries in his overnight bag. ‘I can just grab a coffee for the road if you want to sleep in a little longer’ he commented.

‘I thought you wanted to avoid getting back too early’ Liam said, recalling him complaining about his mom’s plans to highjack their Sunday afternoon.

‘I want to stop by the gallery on the way home and check on a few things’ Neal explained. ‘I haven't been there in over a week.’

Liam sat up, his legs dangling off the edge of the bed as if he were a kid instead of a grown man. He rubbed his eyes, completing the tableau and thought back to the previous night, how he’d been too nervous to go back to his dorm for fear Todd would come skulking in to join him in bed in the middle of the night. Once Josh returned from his visit back home, he'd be safe from unwanted nocturnal visits - even Todd drew the line at having an audience for their little tête-à-têtes. 

Liam had been visibly relieved when Neal had offered to share his hotel room with him. It would be the perfect opportunity to spend some quality time with his dad or so Liam had contended as he’d readily agreed to his dad’s suggestion. Neal had seen right through his son’s enthusiastic response and had quickly deduced the actual reason for his eagerness — and it had very little to do with spending time with his old man, considering Liam had spent the rest of the evening and part of the night glued to his computer, playing video games.

‘We have the room until eleven’ Neal announced. ‘If you want to shower and stuff.’

He watched as Liam scratched his head, his sandy blond hair in a confused mess, sticking up wildly in disarray - maybe he and Todd weren't such a strange pair after all. All he needed was some colourful highlights and his hairstyle would be the perfect counterpoint to his boyfriend’s vivid locks. 

Neal chuckled and Liam stared back. ‘What?’

‘Nothing. You look like you did when you were three years old.’

Neal slipped his hand into his back pocket and pulled out an envelope, taking a seat next to his son on the edge of the bed.

‘Here’ he said, handing it over. ‘This is from Mom and me… for a few extras.’

‘Daaad!’ Liam moaned. ‘Everything’s covered for me here… all my meals and stuff.’

Neal got a mischievous look in his eye. ‘Maybe you can take Todd to the tanning salon or you can get yourself some highlights’ he teased as Liam scowled back.

‘Sorry’ Neal added. ‘I couldn't resist. Look, take the money and treat yourself to something nice, okay? And let me know if you need anything.’

Liam reached out and took the envelope, his arms moving to hug his dad.

It was an awkward hug, considering they were sitting side by side on the edge of a bed. Neal reached up and ruffled Liam’s hair, messing it up even more. He got to his feet and grabbed his bag off the bed.

‘How about I surprise Mom and bring her up for a visit in a couple of weeks, maybe catch one of your games.’

‘That’d be great, Dad’ Liam replied, getting to his feet.

There was another hug, this one not so awkward and the men pulled away, looking into each other’s eyes.

‘Trust in yourself, son. You have great instincts and you’ll do the right thing’ Neal said with a loving smile. ‘Now, don’t go getting yourself into any trouble, all right?’

And just like that, he was gone, leaving Liam to ponder the mess that was his love life.

WCWCWC

The sound of the kettle whistling competed with the ringing of the doorbell, snapping Elizabeth out of her reverie. She took a moment to pour the water into the waiting teapot and called out to her best friend.

‘Come on in, Sara! It’s open.’

When Peter had insisted on popping into the gallery for a few hours, she’d decided it was the perfect time to invite Sara over for tea, considering Neal was away for the weekend. She heard the sound of her friend taking off her coat and boots in the distance.

‘Hey El! I picked up some croissants at that place up the street’ came Sara’s voice from the front hall.

She appeared, carrying a white pastry box which she deposited on the kitchen island and made her way over to the other side to hug her best friend. ‘I even got the last of those almond croissants you love so much.’

‘It’s awfully quiet in here’ she observed, looking around. ‘Where’s Peter?’

‘He wanted to get some work done at the gallery’ she said, eyebrows raised.

Lately, Sara had been picking up on a certain frustration or maybe it was annoyance whenever Elizabeth mentioned the Raphael; what was that all about?

‘So, when does Neal get back from Syracuse?’ El asked, bringing the teapot to sit between them.

‘Not until later’ Sara groused. ‘I think he’s avoiding me… he’s been putting off going shopping for a new mattress for a couple of weeks now. He’s come up with every excuse in the book and he thinks I’m too stupid to notice. My guess is he’s probably taking the long way home through all the little hick towns so he doesn't get back until all the stores are closed.’

El gave her a questioning look; it was the first she’d heard of this latest irritant in the Caffrey marriage.

Sara gave her hand a wave, dismissing her best friend’s look. ‘Never mind. It’s a long story.’ 

‘So…’ Elizabeth said, leaning in eagerly. ‘Liam’s back in Syracuse… he looked happy while he was here, huh?’

‘Yeah’ Sara sighed. ‘It was nice to have him home for a couple of weeks. I didn’t realize just how much I missed him until he left again yesterday.’

Elizabeth poured them each a cup of tea as she listened. ‘And Hope looked amazing at the party the other night’ she said. ‘She’s looking really relaxed lately and I notice she’s stuttering a lot less.’

The hesitation in Hope’s speech had been an unfortunate carryover from her brain injury. It was more noticeable when she got upset or anxious but someone meeting her for the first time might just chalk it up to an unusual speech pattern, slower and more deliberate than normal. But those who’d known her prior to her accident could tell the difference - she was more tentative and thoughtful as she spoke, her mouth not quite keeping up with the quick pace of her brilliant mind. 

Sara smiled as she thought of her beautiful daughter. ‘Yeah, she’s in a good place right now. Of course, Cameron has a lot to do with that.’

Try as she might, Elizabeth Burke just couldn’t help herself. ‘Any news on a wedding date?’

‘You’ve got to stop asking me that, El’ Sara whined. ‘I’m not getting anywhere with Hope. Yesterday, she got really testy when I pushed it. She says they want to announce it to Cam’s parents first… something about the Armstrongs feeling left out.’

‘Do you think she’ll let me do the wedding planning?’ El asked excitedly. ‘I mean… when the time comes.’

Suddenly, a bunch of magazines and catalogues appeared out of nowhere, littering the kitchen island. Sara flashed back to her own wedding, how for a while there, she’d felt like it had been highjacked by the overeager wedding planner and how she’d had to put her foot down so that she and Neal could have the day they’d wanted and not the one Elizabeth dreamed of.

El pointed to a photograph of a beautiful wedding gown with satin trim. ‘I think Hope would look amazing in something like this’ she enthused as Sara rolled her eyes.

‘Stop it!’ she said with a chuckle. ‘You know Hope. She’s going to do this her way. Not your way and not my way. If she asks you to plan it for her, you’re going to have to rein it in and be careful about not overstepping. She’s going to need a lot of space.’

Elizabeth looked miffed for a brief instant and exhaled; even though retirement loomed ahead, she still got excited at the thought of planning a wedding - especially her goddaughter’s wedding. She already had plenty of ideas for caterers, the venue, the dress, the flowers, the cake. 

‘This might be my last big event’ she sighed loudly. ‘Maybe I can get Peter to find out what’s going on with her… Hope can never say no to him.’

Sara gave her the evil eye but decided to let it go; Elizabeth would always be Elizabeth. Instead, she focussed on what El had just said. ‘What do you mean, your last big event?’

Elizabeth opened the pastry box and grabbed for the almond croissant, picking off a small piece and popping it into her mouth. ‘I’ve decided to sell the business to Yvonne and officially retire. Peter’s going to stop working too’ she announced.

‘Peter? Retire from working at the gallery? You’re kidding!’

Elizabeth frowned. ‘What? Sara, he is seventy-three years old, you know’ as if that was news to Sara. ‘I know he doesn’t like to admit it but…’

‘I suppose…’ Sara mused. Whenever she looked at her husband’s best friend, she didn’t see a seventy-three year old man, just a very healthy, able bodied man with thinning hair and greying temples. ‘I just can’t imagine Peter sitting around the house, taking it easy. Anyway, I thought he loved working at the gallery.’

‘He does… It’s just… When, exactly, are we supposed to start relaxing and have some fun?’ Elizabeth asked rhetorically. 

Sara frowned, surprised. ‘I always thought working at the gallery was fun for Peter’ she said.

Elizabeth had a long list of projects for their upcoming retirement and she wasn’t about to let her best friend dampen her spirits. ‘I want us to travel, spend some quality time together. Peter went from the Bureau straight into working at the gallery and he spends way too many hours there as it is.’

‘I suppose… Has he told Neal yet?’ Sara asked, grabbing for a blueberry scone.

‘No, not yet. He says there’s too much going on right now with Neal’s health and all that but… well, he promised that by summer, he’d stop working for good.’

Neal’s health, Sara mused. Except for working at adjusting his new medication, there were no issues with Neal’s health - none that she knew of, anyway. Was Neal keeping something from her?

She tried to imagine life at the Raphael Gallery without Peter Burke. He’d been a permanent fixture there for years now. Neal would be sad to hear the news, that was for sure. Even though the ex-con spent most of his time at the June Ellington School of Art these days, the gallery remained his baby and he’d always been able to count on Peter to make sure things were run just so, exactly how he wanted them to be. 

El watched the wheels turning in Sara’s eyes. ‘Don’t tell Neal’ she warned. ‘Peter wants to wait for things to settle down a little before he tells him.’ 

‘Seriously El? You tell me something like this and you expect me to keep it from Neal?’

‘Just… maybe hint at it. That way it won’t come as such a shock when Peter finally springs it on him.’

Sara nodded; she could do that. Just set the stage, maybe mention Peter was looking tired lately. That way, Neal wouldn't be so surprised when he finally heard the news.

‘Okay…’ she said with a hesitant nod.

WCWCWC

Caitlin heard the phone ring six times before realizing she was alone in the house. If she didn’t get it, nobody would - unless Raffie had recently developed a pincer grasp she hadn't been made aware of. She reached for it, almost instantly wishing she hadn’t.

‘Hi sweetheart’ came Jackie Somersby’s shaky voice; it was immediately obvious to her daughter that she’d been drinking.

‘Hi Mom’ Caitlin said, grudgingly.

‘Did you have a nice Christmas? I meant to call but…’

That was about the point where Caitlin tuned out. She’d heard it all before. All the excuses for not calling, not showing up when they’d arranged to meet — or showing up late if she did bother to show up. Her life was infinitely better when her mother stayed away and left her the hell alone. 

‘Mom!’ Caitlin interjected. ‘I’m just on my way out. I can’t talk right now.’

She could sense the disappointment in Jackie’s voice but she couldn’t be bothered to care. 

‘But honey, I was hoping we could meet up for coffee later’ the woman whined.

‘Not today, Mom’ Caitlin said, fighting the tears that were forming in her eyes. ‘I told you, we can get together when you’re sober.’

She didn't want to give the woman the satisfaction of knowing she was upset. ‘I’ll call you next week’ she said curtly before hanging up. ‘Stay clean and we can set up a time to meet. Otherwise, don’t call back.’

And with that Caitlin hung up, her lower lip quivering. Raffie appeared at her side and lay his head on her lap and she reached down to caress the top of his head. How did he always know?

WCWCWC

Wintry Sunday afternoons - especially on the heels of the holiday season - were not exactly prime time at the Raphael Gallery. People were still cocooning following the holidays and it wasn’t surprising to find just a handful of customers strolling down the sidewalks of the Chelsea Art District.

Neal recognized Peter’s car in the lone parking spot dedicated to the gallery and easily found a place to park a block over, making his way to his beloved gallery with a spring in his step.

‘What are you doing here?’ Peter called out when the bell jingled and Neal appeared. 

‘What do you mean, what am I doing here? I could ask you the same thing’ Neal replied with an upside down grin. ‘Besides, I’m still the owner of this joint, as far as I know.’

Peter got to his feet, smiling warmly. ‘Sorry. I’m just… I thought you went to Syracuse for the weekend.’

‘I did, I’m just on my way back. Haven’t even been home yet’ Neal replied, glancing around.

‘Oh, are you still avoiding the… mattress shopping?’ Peter asked knowingly.

Neal’s eyes narrowed, giving him that look that said ‘what are you talking about?’ before relaxing and shrugging. There were no secrets between the two men - or at least, he thought there were no secrets between them.

‘If Sara asks, don’t tell her I was here’ Neal pleaded as Peter nodded knowingly.

‘Is Cam around today?’ Neal asked.

The place was all but deserted except for an older couple Neal didn’t recognize who were taking their time, meandering around the main floor, admiring each piece, one at a time.

‘He’s upstairs’ Peter replied. ‘He brought over a couple of new things Hope just finished.’

‘Oh yeah?’ Neal said, looking a little sulky. ‘She didn’t tell me she was working on anything new.’

Hope did most of her work in the basement studio he shared with her at home but for Christmas, Cam had set her up with a mini-studio in a corner of his apartment, complete with an easel and all she might be needing so she could paint whenever the urge struck. It was just another part of his life with his little girl that seemed to be slipping away.

‘Just two small pieces’ Peter explained as Neal nodded, putting on a brave face.

‘So, how was Liam when you left him?’ he asked, perching himself on the edge of the desk. ‘Glad to be back at school?’

‘Good, good. He’s working out some… stuff but he’ll get through it. He’s a smart kid’ Neal replied.

‘Oh, guess what?’ Peter said, his face growing animated. ‘Clinton called me yesterday. He’s got a case that has him stumped and he asked if you and I could pop in and give him a hand. Some art forgery thing, I think.’

Neal’s eyes brightened. Like his partner, he missed the good old days at the Bureau and he enjoyed a challenge. ‘Yeah, sure. I have a staff meeting on Tuesday but I could get away tomorrow morning. Would that work?’

Peter nodded and Neal couldn’t help but notice the excitement dancing in his eyes. Peter might be a little long in the tooth to be running undercover operations but there was nothing wrong with that discerning mind of his; the older man was still as sharp as a tack. 

‘I’ll give him a call and let him know’ Peter said with a pat on Neal’s back.

He watched as Neal glanced over in the direction of the staircase, leading up to the second floor where he, Hope and Caitlin - and occasionally Emily Foster - displayed the fruits of their labour. Peter knew exactly what his best friend was thinking. 

‘Go on’ he said with a nod in that direction. ‘I know you’re dying to go check it out.’

WCWCWC

Sara had been surprised to find Neal still wasn’t home when she returned shortly before five. There was a note on the table - from Caitlin. She’d headed out to meet a friend for dinner and she wanted her foster parents to know she wouldn’t be home until later. 

Sara poked around the fridge, trying to figure out what to pull together for dinner. It would be just her and Neal and she grabbed some leftover chicken, intent of throwing it into a salad - pretty well the limits of her culinary talents. 

Raffie had barely lifted his head when she’d come in and she made her way over, crouching down to rub his head.

‘You okay, buddy?’ she asked as she stroked his fur.

He immediately rolled over onto his back, hoping for a tummy rub and she indulged him for a moment, his paws stretched up in the air as he savoured the unexpected attention. Raffie had been a handful when they’d first gotten him as a young pup but lately, he’d been slowing down although he still enjoyed his daily walk. Otherwise, he’d turned into a regular couch potato, content with the little bit of attention he was afforded by the humans in his life; after all, you had to take your pleasure where you could.

Sara spotted her iPod on the kitchen counter - the one she used as motivation on her infrequent jogs through the neighbourhood. She and Neal didn’t go out running anywhere near as often as they used to, preferring to hit the gym sporadically and sometimes, in Neal’s case, the pool at their neighbourhood community centre. She popped the earbuds in and began to bop around, pulling things out of the fridge and spreading everything out in front of her on the kitchen counter. 

And that is exactly where Neal found her when he stepped into the house ten minutes later.

She stood with her back to him, earbuds in and her hips swaying back and forth to the rhythm of whatever it was she was listening to. She hummed, throwing in a few words here and there and Neal would have been hard pressed to guess what song she was listening to, considering how tone deaf his wife was. He removed his coat and boots in the front hall and took a few steps towards the kitchen, standing in silence for a moment, enjoying the view.

Sara Ellis was a strange creature; so confident and sure of herself in most situations and yet so totally unguarded and vulnerable in others. Neal stood watching with interest, as she continued gyrating. She wore a pair of yoga pants and an oversized t-shirt of his with the sleeves turned up, her feet bare on the kitchen floor as they attempted to follow some hereto silent cadence. He waited for her to turn around so he wouldn't startle her but she kept working, throwing in some cut up cucumber into the large bowl with a flourish as she hummed. 

‘Signed, sealed, delivered’ she crowed loudly, totally off key.

Neal chuckled and nodded to himself, recognizing the lyrics but certainly not the tune. He moved towards her, calling out her name so she’d know he was home but Sara just kept on singing, oblivious to his presence.

‘Sara’ he called out as he got closer. ‘Babe!’ 

Sara continued to bop around, hips swaying from side to side, arms up in the air. 

‘Babe!’ Neal repeated, louder this time. He got within inches of her and his arms reached out to cradle her swinging hips.

And that’s when it happened. 

Sara let out a blood curdling scream and dissolved into a puddle, right at her husband’s feet.

WCWCWC

Liam put down his phone and sighed. Josh had just texted, letting him know he wouldn’t be getting back until late Monday night. Liam had never before felt the need to have someone run interference for him but until he figured out exactly how he was going to handle this whole Todd situation, he would have welcomed his buddy to bounce ideas off of and to buy him more time before dealing with the sordid mess. Without Josh for cover, he would need to work things out by himself - and sooner rather than later. 

Ever since Liam had been knee high to a grasshopper, his dad had teased him mercilessly about how hard it was for him to settle on a course of action without constantly wavering back and forth. In fact, one might say that, for Liam Caffrey, every decision was a difficult decision. He would ponder, cogitate, ruminate, looking at the pros and cons of a situation until things became a blur and arguments faded away in a mess of confusion. He lived with the fear of making the wrong decision, worried he might be making a mistake he would live to regret. 

‘I think you should have been a Libra’ he could imagine his dad saying.

But Liam had always been an introvert, listening carefully to all points of view and taking in every single aspect of a situation before expressing an opinion or, heaven forbid, coming to a decisive conclusion. Like that time when, at the age of five, he couldn’t decide between the blue bike with the training wheels or the red one with the streamers. Those streamers were awfully cool but blue was his favourite colour… And then, there were the weekly visits to that frozen yogurt place that his dad dreaded. He’d try to get Liam to commit to a flavour on the way there to avoid the long silence at the counter while Liam pondered the sweetness of chocolate against the pleasant tartness of the blueberry, mumbling under his breath and drumming his index finger against his bottom lip. 

Choosing a major at university had taken months as Liam weighed the different options, complete with flow charts and endless lists of pros and cons.

Another thing Liam Caffrey excelled at besides sound decision making was procrastination and spending the night playing mindless video games had only made his decision regarding Todd Greenway more difficult; now, he was exhausted and he was having trouble focussing. His best bet was to avoid Todd for another few hours while he pondered his options a little while longer and arrived at a reasonable course of action.

He stretched out on the bed in his dorm, staring up at the ceiling as he began to make a mental list of the pros and cons of breaking up with Todd Greenway. 

Liam shook his head and opened his eyes.

‘Concentrate’ he told himself, realizing he was getting a little sidetracked. His mind wandered and he began to feel his body relaxing. It had been a short night what with his dad’s constant snoring and the lure of his computer screen under the sheets. 

He felt himself begin to drift off.

He couldn't be sure how long he was out but when he came to it, there was a hand running up and down his back, cupping his butt and squeezing.

‘Todd…’ he murmured with a mixture of exasperation and delight as he came to.

He didn't get much past that; whatever sense of uncertainty he might have been feeling seemed to vanish when the man brought his lips to Liam’s, kissing him punishingly while holding him down on the bed.

And that was the moment when all reasoning seemed to evaporate and Liam Caffrey’s body won the battle with his rational mind.

TBC


	15. Chapter 15

Sara heard her name being called from somewhere off in the distance, as if through a long, hollow tunnel.

‘Sara! Sara!’ the voice said insistently.

She fought the fog in her brain and forced her eyes open, blinking as Neal came into focus, staring back at her with a worried look on his face.

‘Wh —’ she attempted to say, her voice a mere whisper.

For some reason she couldn't quite fathom, she was lying in Neal’s arms on the floor in the middle of their kitchen and there were deep lines etched on his forehead, his face a mere inches from hers. 

‘Sara, sweetheart…’ he said breathlessly, his steely blue eyes narrowing at the sight of her. ‘…are you all right?’

Competing with Neal’s soft voice was Stevie Wonder, still crooning directly in her left ear but for a reason she couldn’t quite comprehend, his voice was also echoing throughout the kitchen as the second earbud lay by her side, a casualty of her ungraceful tumble. She grimaced and looked up at Neal with a puzzled look.

‘I’m so sorry babe’ he murmured although she wasn't quite sure what exactly he was apologizing for. Had he tackled her to the ground from behind, causing her to face plant so inelegantly?

She struggled to lift her head, Neal’s hand instantly on her arm to keep her from sitting up all the way. ‘Don’t move… just give it a second, okay’ he urged. ‘Let me get you some water.’

‘Noooo’ she moaned as she continued to fight him off. 

‘Honey, please. Just… indulge me, all right?’ he said, a plea that was so fervent that she gave in and let her head fall back momentarily against the cold, hard floor. She opened her eyes a crack, watching as Neal ran over to the sink and reached into the cupboard for a glass.

He was immediately back by her side, helping her sit up and holding the glass of water to her lips.

‘Here’ he said. ‘Take a little sip.’

Her mind was becoming clearer now, the events of the last few minutes gradually coming into focus. She blinked a few times, still somewhat confused and looked up at Neal who was still staring down at her with a solemn look on his face. 

‘I… passed out?’ she asked. 

There was a reason she was a first rate insurance investigator; apparently, she had amazing observation skills.

‘Yeah, one minute you were… singing’ he said, conceding that he was using the term rather loosely. ‘And then, all of a sudden you let out this scream…’ 

‘I was… making a salad’ Sara said, her voice rough as she noticed the upturned bowl on the floor nearby, pieces of tomatoes, cucumber and lettuce littering the floor around her.

‘I didn’t mean to sneak up on you. I just… I touched you from behind and you let out this scream and the next thing I knew… you were on the floor.’

Sara frowned. ‘Help me up’ she moaned.

‘You’re sure you didn't hurt yourself?’ he asked, running his hand along her arms and legs, checking for any obvious signs of injury.

She touched her back, rubbing it gently as if to make sure everything was intact. ‘No, I’m fine. Just… help me get up’ she repeated.

‘Easy… easy’ Neal warned as he supported her weight. 

She looked down at the mess on the floor, the salad fixings strewn all over the place and Raffie sniffing away at the mess, his discriminate palate not terribly impressed with what was on offer. Neal chuckled softly and reached out to pluck a piece of romaine lettuce from Sara’s hair, letting it drop to the floor to join the rest of the mess.

Stevie Wonder had stopped singing and now Adele was crooning nearby. Neal reached over for the iPod and silenced her with a flick of his wrist before pulling out the lone remaining earbud from Sara’s ear. 

‘Here’ he said, leading her towards the couch in the family room. ‘Sit down here for a minute.’

‘I’m fine, Neal. Stop fussing’ she said as if that was going to keep him from doing his doting husband routine.

‘You fainted, Sara’ he said, his face serious. ‘Maybe we should have you checked out… make sure you didn't hurt yourself.’

‘Neal, you scared the bejesus out of me, that’s all’ she replied, annoyed. ‘What the hell were you doing sneaking up on me like that, anyway.’

‘I wasn't sneaking up on you. I kept calling your name. I thought I’d scare you even more if I suddenly appeared in your field of vision so I just touched you… lightly.’

She scowled back at him. ‘Well… don’t do that’ she said.

He took a seat next to her on the couch, bringing the glass of water to her lips forcibly and Sara pushed his hand away impatiently.

‘Stop fussing Neal. I’m fine’ she said, taking a deep breath and regaining full control of her faculties.

‘You’re sure you don’t want to go get checked out? We could just go to the clinic, have you looked at…’

She gave him an icy stare, instantly silencing him; he knew that look. Luckily, she’d only been out a few seconds but it sure had been a scary spectacle, her scream alone had been enough to wake the dead.

‘Then indulge me and just sit here quietly for a minute’ he insisted.

She let her head flop back against the back of the couch and took another cleansing breath. Neal began to relax at the sight of her, looking like she normally did - her usual annoyed look whenever he fussed over her. Did people really faint as a result of being startled, he wondered. As soon as he got her squared away, he’d be consulting Dr. Google to find out. 

His breathing finally slowed, returning to normal and Sara sat up, taking his hand in hers. ‘How come you’re so late, anyway? We said we’d hit the stores’ she scolded. Apparently, even a fainting spell wasn't enough for Sara Ellis to take her eye off the prize.

Neal’s eyes shifted slightly but she was still a little off kilter and her usually keen sense of observation didn't kick in as it might normally have. 

‘There was… this really bad accident on the I95’ Neal fibbed. ‘It took… forever to get back.’ 

‘How did it go with Liam?’ Sara asked, satisfied with his answer. ‘Was he okay when you left him?’

Neal appeared relieved to change the subject. ‘Yeah, yeah, he was fine’ he replied.

‘Did you remember to give him the envelope with the money?’ 

‘I did’ Neal said reassuringly, his hand still clasping hers. All the while, he was giving her the once over, noticing that her eyes seemed clear, her pupils normal. To his relief, there were no other signs of injury and she was sounding just like her old self: bossy and dismissive.   
‘He ended up staying in my hotel room with me last night’ Neal added with an amused grin. ‘I think he wasn’t ready to face Todd, who I met, by the way.’

Sara sat up and smiled broadly. ‘Oh yeah? Tell me everything.’

‘Well, for one thing, he’s the furthest you can imagine from Cody’ Neal said as he thought of the over the top young man he’d met. ‘Really out there, you know, loud, flamboyant I guess you’d say. Very… tactile.’

‘Tactile?’

‘He had his hands all over Liam, didn't care I was standing right there.’

‘What? That doesn't sound like Liam’s type’ Sara replied with a chuckle.

Neal shrugged. ‘He was embarrassed, that’s for sure. The guy has blond spiky hair with pink highlights and he was wearing this pink muscle shirt that looked about two sizes too small’ Neal recounted. ‘He actually hit on me.’

‘No way!’ Sara replied, her little fainting spell already forgotten.

‘Said I had a great jawline but he was checking out my butt when he said it.’

Sara laughed. ‘You’re making that up, Caffrey!’

‘No word of a lie’ Neal chuckled. ‘Liam was horrified. He managed to put him off until today and then he kept saying how we hadn't had enough time together until I finally asked if he wanted to sleep over at the hotel with me. He practically hugged me when I suggested it.’

‘Poor Liam!’

‘Not poor Liam. He knows what he's doing. This guy must be pretty hot between the sheets because he’s got our son really rattled’ Neal commented.

‘Ewww Neal!’ Sara moaned, hitting him playfully on the arm. ‘Too much information!’ 

‘What? Honey, both our kids are sexually active. You’re going to have to accept it, sooner or later.’

‘I do… accept it. I just… don’t want to think about it. Or hear about it’ she replied with a grimace.

‘That’s probably how they feel about our sex life’ Neal countered as he ran his finger suggestively down her arm.

Sara glanced at the mess left behind on the kitchen floor and made a move to stand up to clean it up.

‘Oh no, you don’t’ Neal said, getting to his feet first. ‘I’ll get that. You just sit here and relax. I’ll bring you a glass of wine.’

He took stock of the mess on the floor and glanced back at her. 

‘And maybe a couple of take-out menus.’

WCWCWC

The sun had already gone down when Liam woke, Todd’s warm body still pressed up firmly against his on the narrow twin bed. He reached over for his brand new phone and glanced at it, checking the time. No wonder his stomach was growling; it was going on seven o’clock and he hadn't had anything to eat since before noon.

‘Hey babe’ Todd cooed, coming alive beside him.

He nuzzled Liam’s neck, depositing little butterfly kisses as he let out a satisfied moan.

‘Now that was a nice homecoming’ he murmured, letting his hand linger on Liam’s chest.

Liam’s brain seemed to have resumed functioning - at least better than it had been earlier. Their impromptu encounter wasn't exactly what he’d envisioned when he’d suggested they go for coffee. Nevertheless, he was feeling pretty amazing: perfectly relaxed and warm and toasty with Todd’s arms still tightly wound around him.

‘Yeah…’ he whispered, unable to lie. He placed a kiss on the other man’s forehead. ‘That was nice.’

‘Are you hungry, hotstuff?’ Todd asked as Liam cringed. He hated the pet name Todd insisted on calling him whenever they were in bed together. At least, he’d finally gotten him to stop using it in front of other people - the last time he’d called him that in public, half the basketball team had been within earshot and Liam had read him the riot act. 

‘Todd, I told you…’ Liam said, his voice a warning.

The man just giggled and returned to planting little kisses along Liam’s neck and jawline.

‘I missed you’ he murmured, still in seduction mode. ‘Did you miss me?’

‘I was pretty busy with family stuff, you know… visiting with relatives’ Liam replied, his hand resting around Todd’s shoulder. That much was true… it just wasn't the whole truth.

‘Did you bump into your ex while you were home?’ he asked, pulling away to look into Liam’s eyes.

Luckily, the dim light from the window masked the look of guilt on Liam’s face; he might be able to stretch the truth but his eyes would definitely have given him away.

‘I… ran into him at a New Year’s Eve party’ he confessed.

‘Oh yeah? Was it weird, telling him all about me?’ Todd asked, his tone playful.

If ever there was an opportunity for Liam to share the doubts he’d been having, this was it. Instead, he bit his tongue, deciding it probably wasn't proper etiquette to break up with someone while you were still basking in the afterglow of terrific sex. 

‘It was… a little weird’ Liam admitted, as far as he wanted to go while they were both still horizontal.  
He lifted his head and looked around the darkened room. ‘I don’t know about you but I’m starved’ he said, deflecting with success.

‘I know what you mean, lover. You almost wore me out’ Todd said with an exaggerated pout - that look that did strange things to Liam’s insides.

He chuckled nervously. ‘Come on’ he said, sliding off the bed. ‘My dad gave me some money, I’ll treat you to pizza.’

‘Mmmm’ Todd groaned, tugging at him. Liam knew that sound - it was Todd’s patented ‘let’s go another round’ groan.

‘Come on’ Liam insisted, pulling the other man off the bed. ‘You can tell me all about your trip to Denver.’

If he was going to come clean about the doubts he was having, he’d need a full stomach… and a little bit of physical distance between himself and this boy-man who had him wrapped around his little finger.

WCWCWC

The front door opened just as Neal and Sara were finishing up their bowls of Tom Yum Goong. After cleaning up the mess on their kitchen floor, Neal had come to the conclusion that it was getting a little late to tackle dinner from scratch and it had just been easier to put in a call to their local Thai place and let them do all the work.

‘Hey Dad!’ Hope called out as she appeared, leaning down to place a kiss on her father’s cheek. ‘How was your trip to Syracuse?’

‘Good!’ Neal said, pointing to some spring rolls and a half eaten container of pad thai. ‘You hungry? We ordered way too much.’

‘No, Cam and I went out for Chinese’ she declared taking a seat at the table. Despite what she’d just said, she began poking around the containers of food, plucking a bean sprout with the tip of her fingers and popping it into her mouth before returning for a cashew. 

‘Cam mentioned you stopped by the gallery on the way home. I guess I must have just missed you.’

Neal stared down at his plate, doing his best to avoid Sara’s glare. He’d conveniently neglected to mention he’d made a detour into Manhattan, preferring to spin a tall tale about an accident on the I95 to account for his late arrival. 

‘I… I needed to check on that new exhibit’ he mumbled as Sara rolled her eyes.

‘Whatever…’ she grumbled, reaching for a spring roll and putting it on her plate.

Hope looked from her mom to her dad, picking up on the sudden tension in the room and the frosty look her mom was giving him. ‘What? What did I say?’ 

Sara forced a smile; no point dragging Hope into their little feud. ‘It’s nothing, honey.’ 

Hope knew better than to poke the bear; she really didn’t want to get in the middle of whatever was happening between the two of them. She and Liam had witnessed dozens of arguments between their parents over the years, most of them minor disagreements that were easily resolved. On those occasions, her dad would find a way to make her giggle by tickling her or forcibly putting his arms around her; she would pretend to be annoyed before finally dissolving into a fit of giggles. Most times when the two of them argued, the storm was over before it had ever really begun. 

But there had been a few humdingers over the years, complete with raised voices, prolonged pouting, cold shoulders and the occasional slammed door. Her dad was generally good natured and tended to give in more easily than her mom who was quick tempered and prone to brooding; she usually needed some time to sulk before eventually snapping out of it. After twenty odd years of marriage, arguing had risen to an art form for the Caffreys, a finely tuned dance, predictable in its outcome.

Hope could see the glacial look in her mother’s eyes and her dad’s evasive glances anywhere but in her direction - he’d obviously done something to tick her off and she hadn't yet been able to let it go. Whatever it was, Hope decided she was staying well out of it. Instead, she grabbed for a piece of chicken from the container of pad thai and hummed in appreciation as she bit into it. 

‘Use a plate… please’ Sara said curtly, reverting to mom mode and seemingly taking her repressed frustration out on her daughter.

Hope got to her feet and grabbed a bowl and fork from the cupboard, settling in at the table across from her parents. She proceeded to help herself to a generous helping of pad thai and threw a couple of spring rolls on top as Neal watched in wonder. He’d hate to think of what she would have heaped onto her plate if she hadn’t just had Chinese.

‘It sure is quiet around here when Liam’s not home’ Hope commented, trying to make small talk. What she really meant to say was it sure is quiet around here when the two of you are in the middle of an argument.

‘Have you and Cameron decided when you’re leaving to go upstate?’ Neal asked, breaking the uneasy silence.

‘Yeah, I was just telling Uncle Peter. We’re leaving on Wednesday the week after next. That way, I won’t have to cancel the Tuesday night class at the gallery. Do you think you can manage that Thursday after school class at the school without me?’ she asked her dad.

‘Yeah, of course’ Neal said without hesitation. ‘I can do it myself… or I’ll get one of the other teachers to fill in.’

Sara put down her spoon. ‘Honey, Daddy and I were talking. You know, we could manage with just one car for a week. I hate to think of you on the road in Cam’s beat up old Chevy.’

‘It’s okay. We’ve booked train tickets. We thought it would be more special… feel like more of a holiday’ Hope explained, her mouth full.

‘Great idea, sweet pea’ Neal said, nodding. ‘Do you… do you need any extra cash for your trip?’

‘You mean besides the more than adequate salary you’re paying both of us?’ Hope said with a chuckle. ‘No, we’re fine Dad.’

Neal pushed away his plate and began rubbing at his temples. Whatever tension there was in the air seemed to be getting the better of him. 

‘Oh, honey, are you getting another one of those headaches?’ Sara asked, her tone slightly condescending. 

He couldn't gauge the level of sarcasm in her voice at first. Not that he was faking, exactly, but sensing that Sara was beginning to thaw, he figured the time might be right to play the sympathy card - something he’d learned from watching Peter Burke ‘handle’ his wife over their many years of marriage.

‘Yeah’ he moaned, rubbing his neck and looking over at his wife with puppy dog eyes. ‘I guess it’s all that driving…’ 

Sara gave his back a quick dismissive pat and pulled away, her bullshit radar seemingly on high alert. Meanwhile, Neal waited with bated breath for some sign of a truce: a loving word of encouragement, perhaps a small peck on the cheek, maybe a sweet smile. 

Sara batted her eyes at him. ‘Well, it’s too bad you’re going to have to sleep on an old, lumpy mattress.’

WCWCWC

Sunday nights were usually ‘early to bed’ nights in the Caffrey household. Workdays were busy for all its occupants: Hope was putting in long hours at the gallery as was Caitlin who was doing double duty between her twenty hours a week at the day care and whatever she could pick up at Café Crystal, the trendy new coffee shop in the White Plains business district. Sara was still putting in long days at Sterling Bosch and Neal… well, Neal continued juggling the gallery, the school of art and, as if that wasn’t enough, regular visits to his mom in New Rochelle. 

As he lumbered up the stairs to their bedroom, he recognized the theme from ‘Masterpiece Theatre’ playing softly in the background. Sara was in the habit of turning on the television in their bedroom for company while she sorted out her wardrobe for the coming week. Ever since the break-in that had resulted in her kidnapping four years earlier, she couldn’t abide total silence in the house and he’d learned to accept her need for white noise. It was certainly no worse than sleeping with the lights on - something he’d learned to do for weeks following the ugly incident. 

It was only nine o’clock but Neal was exhausted, ready to hit the sack - without any more drama, he hoped. Sara had been giving him the cold shoulder since dinnertime and he wasn’t quite sure how he’d be received when he slipped into bed next to her. Best case scenario was a quick cuddle followed by a good night’s sleep, worst case…well, he’d rather not think about it. They were calling for almost a foot of snow overnight and he needed to be on his game for that meeting with Jones at the White Collar offices in the morning.

He stepped off the staircase and glanced into his son’s room, noticing everything in its place, no clothes lying on the floor, no laptop on the bed. Hope was right, it sure was quiet when Liam was away. He peeked into his and Sara’s bedroom across the hall, noticing her going through her closet and he made a quick detour to the bathroom before confronting the inevitable. 

Sara Ellis could give the cold shoulder like no one he’d ever met and her mercurial moods needed to be handled with a great deal of care and precision. Neal Caffrey had more than twenty years of practice in dealing with the fiery insurance investigator’s mood swings and he had a pretty good track record - good but not perfect. He was generally pretty adept at evaluating whether one of his megawatt smiles was going to be sufficient to thaw her frosty disposition or whether it was going to take something more: perhaps a loving hug or the always winning fluttering eyelashes. On the odd occasion, a dispute might linger a day or so, forcing him to resort to those traditional ‘tail between his legs’ strategies every husband worth his salt had in his arsenal: apologies galore, a gorgeous bouquet of her favourite flowers, dinner out, a gift certificate to her favourite spa. 

Sometimes, just calling her Repo was enough to break the tension although he doubted this was one of those times. She’d gotten herself pretty worked up by the time she’d trudged upstairs ostensibly to get ready for bed. As Neal knew all too well, few things rattled his wife more than when he wasn't being perfectly honest with her. Of all his petty little faults, it was probably the thing that irked her the most. She’d known him back in his heyday when deception was an everyday staple for the ex-conman and she hated the thought of being played - no matter how insignificant the lie or the deception. 

Neal examined himself in the bathroom mirror as he pondered his best shot at getting back in his wife’s good graces. One thing was for sure, he didn’t want either one of them going to sleep angry; they tried to avoid that at all costs although, sadly, like in every marriage, it had happened on a few occasions. He put away his toothbrush and took a deep breath, hoping this wasn't one of those times. 

He stepped out into the hallway and crossed over into the bedroom, his eyes riveted on Sara’s back as she continued examining a blouse she was holding up. She didn't bother to make eye contact, definitely a bad sign. It rendered his chances of winning her over with his easygoing charm practically nil. 

He could feel the fatigue deep in his bones; he wasn't feeling particularly up to the challenge, a little off his game. Maybe his best bet was the direct approach, nothing fancy: just plenty of heartfelt apologies and the most sincere expression of regret he could possibly muster. 

‘Hey’ he said, his voice conciliatory. ‘You still mad at me?’ 

The fact that he was staring at her back made it impossible for him to get a good read on her state of mind. He waited patiently and after a moment, Sara turned to face him, glaring at him, thus ending the suspense. She threw the blouse to join another one already lying on the bed. 

Her tone of voice when she finally spoke was snarky and just this side of spiteful. ‘I just wish you’d told me the truth and not made up some stupid story about an accident on the I95’ she said curtly. 

Her eyes moved to study the two silk blouses, lying side by side on the bedspread - not even giving him the courtesy of looking at him. 

‘I didn't make anything up’ Neal said earnestly, pleading his case. ‘There was an accident on the I95…it just… it wasn’t quite as bad as I made it out to be and then I thought I’d check in at the gallery since I’m not going to have time to go in tomorrow.’

Sara’s gaze moved to look into his eyes, trying her best to evaluate his level of sincerity. ‘You know how I feel about lies and deception, Neal’ she murmured. ‘Even little white lies.’ 

He took a few steps towards her, his arms reaching out for her but Sara was having none of it and she stepped back, unwilling to let him get close enough to touch her. 

‘Don’t!’ she said dismissively as Neal gave up and sat on the edge of the bed.

‘Look, I’m sorry. I should have been a little more….’ He hesitated, grasping for the correct word.

‘Honest? Truthful? Forthcoming?’ Sara said curtly.

Neal sighed. ‘Sara, that’s not fair.’

She let her arms drop in an apparent sign of defeat. ‘Neal, I’m not one of your marks, all right? You can’t just blink those baby blues of yours and expect to pull the wool over my eyes.’

Apparently, she was angrier than he’d originally thought.

‘Honey…’ he pleaded, getting to his feet once again.

‘I’m your wife, Neal, your wife of twenty-three years, I might add. I hate it when you treat me like some… bimbo who’s going to trip all over herself and fall prey to your… irresistible charms, which are not all that irresistible - or endearing, by the way.’

She crossed her arms, almost an exclamation point.

‘Sara, that’s crazy! I would never think of you as a mark’ Neal said, taking her arm and forcing her to look at him. ‘Look at me. I’m sorry! You’re right, okay? I should have just said I didn't want to go shopping today instead of… taking my time coming home so I could avoid it.’

To her silence, he added. ‘Sara… babe…’ as he reached out to touch her once more and watching in disappointment as she pulled away. 

She shook her head in a sign of exasperation and sighed, returning to the closet and fiddling with a few skirts, adjusting them on the hangers mindlessly. Neal stood there like a kid waiting to find out if he was going to be grounded - and if so, for how long. 

‘How long are you going to punish me for this?’ he asked, looking down at the floor. 

‘As long as… it takes’ she muttered under her breath but he could tell by the tone of her voice that she was starting to come around.

Neal moved to stand in front of his dresser and began taking off his clothes, searching for a pair of sleep pants to slip into. The days of cajoling his wife by using his undeniable charm were long gone; he should have known better - but old habits died hard.

Sara continued setting out her outfit for her Monday morning appointment with her new client while Neal slipped into bed. He turned towards her, letting his hand linger on the soft silky material of one of the blouses which lay next to him.

‘These are nice. I don’t remember ever seeing this one’ he commented as he ran his hand over a pale blue blouse with covered buttons lining the shoulder. 

‘That’s because I just bought it yesterday’ she replied sneeringly. ‘…instead of a new mattress for our bed’ she couldn't help but add.

Neal locked eyes with her, his blood pressure beginning to rise. ‘All right, Sara. I get it. You’re pissed off’ he said, arms open wide. ‘I messed up, okay? And I can’t change what happened today.’

Sara just stared back at him, apparently she wasn't yet ready to let it go.

‘Fine! Be like that’ Neal mumbled, turning to face the window and sliding in under the duvet. He crossed his arms in an act of defiance and pulled the covers up to his chin. ‘You go ahead and sulk as long and you want to. Just let me know when you’re done and you’re ready to forgive me. Right now, I need to get some sleep.’ 

Sara stared at the back of his head and frowned. Wasn't he supposed to work harder, to cajole her, talk her down, make her see sense. It wasn't like Neal to give up on her so easily and turn his back on her like that.

She huffed and waited for him to turn around and look at her. When he didn’t, she stomped her foot like a spoiled child and stormed out of the room.

TBC


	16. Chapter 16

Neal dreamt as he slept. He was relaxing in the hammock of their backyard deck on a beautiful summer day. The air was fresh and the fragrance of lily of the valley from the nearby garden filled the air as a sweet breeze rocked him gently back and forth, back and forth, back and forth. Suddenly, there was a fly buzzing around his ears and the annoying bug began to flutter around his face, tickling at his nose persistently. He swatted at the nagging tickle once then a second time; the damn thing sure was persistent. His eyes gently drifted open in the early morning light and he swatted away a third time, realizing he was dealing with a wayward strand of Sara’s hair - no fly in sight. 

He blinked and repositioned himself, pulling away from the annoying tickle as he took stock of the situation. He was lying flat on his back and Sara was splayed out across his chest, her arm thrown across his body with total abandon, a position she often drifted into as she slept soundly. He giggled sleepily; no matter how pissed off she might have been when she’d come to bed, her body seemed to have a mind of its own and despite any lingering feelings of irritation or exasperation, it had reverted to what it knew best: curling up against her husband while she slept. He brought his hand up to rest against her shoulder and squeezed, letting his eyes close as he drifted off again.

He had been so exhausted the night before, he’d fallen asleep before she’d even come back to bed and he was pleased to see that she hadn't fled the coop and left him for good despite her obvious annoyance with him. Sara let out a deep sigh and squeezed his waist and Neal lovingly ran a hand through her hair, depositing a soft kiss on the top of her head. She was something, that was for sure. Granted, she did have a point. After twenty odd years of marriage, he should know better than to try to pull a fast one by not being totally honest with her. But old habits died hard and Neal seemed to revert to his old patterns whenever he felt trapped - and mattress shopping had proven to be just too much unwanted pressure. 

Sara let out a loud snort and flipped over onto her left side with a thud. Neal followed suit and curled up behind her, his arms slipping around her waist as he held her close. He might as well get some warmth and closeness while she was unconscious - he likely wouldn't be getting much when she finally woke up. 

He sighed and drifted back to sleep, his face buried in her soft hair.

WCWCWC

When next he woke, Neal could hear the sound of the shower running in the bathroom and the sheets were cool next to him on the bed. The sound of a snowblower could be heard rumbling in the distance and he forced his mind back to reality: Monday morning, snow in the forecast. Yuck. Luckily, that was likely Jeff Mason clearing out the Caffrey driveway, considering Neal had done it for the Masons the previous week: thank heaven for snowblowers and for good neighbours.

He forced his tired body to sit up, feeling those little aches and pains associated with being sixty or perhaps, if he was honest, from a mattress that was past its prime. The sound of the shower stopped and Neal braced himself for his wife’s return which took but a moment. She waltzed in with an oversized bath towel wrapped around her body and he glanced up at her, noticing her avoiding his gaze.

‘Good morning sweetie’ Neal chirped, uncertain how he would be received.

‘Good morning’ she replied rather curtly. Without more than a passing glance in his direction, Sara made her way over to the small makeup table in the corner of their room and began fussing with her hair, preparing to apply her makeup. Neal debated his next move and decided to go for it; maybe sufficient time had passed and she was ready to call a truce. He took a deep breath and walked over, standing behind his wife and staring at her reflection in the mirror. He flashed her a smile - which was not returned - and placed his hands gently on her still wet shoulders, leaning in and feeling her tense beneath his touch. He was about to place a kiss on her cheek but he thought better of it and retreated; he’d always had great instincts.

‘Too soon?’ he asked with a playful grin. The look on her face told him all he needed to know.

‘All right… I’ll be in the shower… if you’re looking for me’ he added playfully, hoping for a smile.

He gave up - at least for the time being. He still had a lot of tricks up his sleeve and if past history was any indication, she’d come around eventually. He was just about to step into the shower when he heard her call out to him. 

‘I got you an appointment to see Dr. Cooper tomorrow at 2:00. Don’t miss it!’

The message was short and sweet and her tone curt but at least she’d cared enough to get him an appointment. 

He didn't reply but rather smiled to himself; all was not lost.

WCWCWC

The first Monday of the month was inventory day at the Raphael Gallery, a process that was carried out monthly by the dynamic duo of Cameron Armstrong and Peter Burke. It consisted of going over the receipts from the previous month, making note of any and all purchases on their list of inventory and taking stock of any new acquisitions that needed to be displayed for the coming month.

When Peter had informed Cam he wouldn't be in until the afternoon, the younger man had reassured him that he could handle things on his own. The tail end of the holiday season had been rather quiet and they were finally catching up following the buying frenzy that had taken place before Christmas. All right, perhaps ‘frenzy’ was a bit of a stretch but there had definitely been a flurry of activity prior to the holidays as patrons came in to make purchases for gift-giving. Their stock was depleted and Cam would need to consult his future father-in-law about some new purchases, sooner rather than later.

Over the years, Cameron Armstrong had shown himself to be a very capable young man. Following his time at NYU and after a few years working part-time at the gallery, he’d been hired on full time at the Raphael while he pursued his master’s degree on a part-time basis. Of course, the fact that he was Hope’s fiancé didn't hurt but Neal had to admit that, regardless of his privileged relationship to the Caffrey clan, Cameron Armstrong was a natural when it came to managing his beloved gallery. His quiet, meticulous manner was just what was needed to run the place efficiently and his eye for talent and his attention to detail made him the complete package.

Having Peter at the gallery, overseeing things, had been Neal’s safety net but, as time passed, he’d begun to realize that, when the moment finally came when Peter decided he’d had enough of the daily grind, Cam would be more than capable to step into the breach.

Neal loved having a place to display his daughter’s paintings as well as Caitlin’s artwork but the truth was, he was even more invested in the school of art. Not only was it an homage to June Ellington, it was the place where he felt he could do the most good - a way of atoning for the many shortcomings in his early life. He had touched hundreds of lives since he’d set up the school and with the help of Cindy Harrington as head of the school’s Foundation, he’d managed to keep it well afloat with new programs coming on stream every year. 

With time, Cameron thought of the gallery with more and more personal pride. Between the two of them, he and Hope spent countless hours there every week, making sure it retained its excellent reputation and that Neal didn’t have to worry about anything. Someday, Hope would inherit this place and Cameron wanted to make sure that it was kept running smoothly and profitably. 

He glanced down at the lengthy list of sales from the holiday season and looked around the place. It was time to bring in some fresh stuff - something new and colourful. He thought back to the cute little vegetarian restaurant he and Hope had visited near his apartment in Flushing. The food had been great - and cheap - and the restaurant owner had featured a local artist on the eatery’s bare walls. It was a win win situation; the restaurant didn't have to invest in buying art and the artist got some great exposure. Cam had fallen in love with the artist’s style and he’d even bought one of her paintings for his crappy little apartment, thinking ahead to when he and Hope finally moved into their new place. This fresh new art was just what the Raphael needed. He pulled out the photographs he’d taken that night, intent on showing them to Neal the next time he came in. 

WCWCWC

Neal was chatting amiably with Ernie at the security desk when Peter stepped into the lobby of the Federal Building at just past 10:00 on Monday morning. The personable ex-con had a gift for making small talk with anyone. Any time. No matter the person’s station in life, Neal always found something to chat about - and not just mindless chatter about the weather either - honest to goodness conversation about something that was meaningful to them. It was the fine art of conversation, something Neal had worked hard to refine back in his conman days although, these days, he used his well honed skill for much more altruistic purposes. 

Peter could see Neal leaning down to get a better look at a photograph the older man had pulled out of his wallet and, as he got closer, he heard Neal fawning over whatever or whoever he was looking at. 

‘He’s a cutie, that’s for sure’ Peter heard Neal say with all the sincerity in the world. 

‘Oh, good morning Peter’ Neal called out, looking up and spotting his best friend standing there. ‘Ernie here was just showing me a picture of his newest great-grandson. Isn’t he gorgeous?’ Neal said, holding up a photograph of a cute little black baby with a head of wavy curls.

‘Agent Burke’ the weathered security guard called out with a smile. ‘We haven't seen you in these parts for a while.’

‘It’s plain old Mr. Burke these days, Ernie’ Peter corrected. ‘How are things with you?’

‘Aw, you know. Another week, another pay check’ the older man said with a genuine smile.

Peter nodded in understanding; not everyone had a lucrative government pension like he had. He felt a twinge of guilt as he looked into the man’s eyes: Ernie had to be in his early eighties and there was no relief in sight. He’d likely be working until he dropped dead on the job. And yet, every day, he smiled at visitors and had a good word for every single person who walked into the Federal Building.  
‘Agent Jones mentioned you’d be coming by today’ the man said. ‘I guess he still needs help from old timers like us every once in a while’ he said with a wink in Peter’s direction.

They parted ways and headed for the elevator bank. The first car that became available was on the north side, the one on the left. It was the one in which Peter and Neal had been riding when the power went out during that ice storm more than two decades earlier. After the incident, Peter had tried to avoid it whenever he could. 

Neal cocked an eyebrow and held the door open for Peter. ‘Enter at your peril’ he said with a grin.

They arrived without incident on the twenty-first floor, the doors opening onto a very busy group of agents, probies and support staff. The place looked pretty well as it always had; the bullpen a hive of activity. There were very few familiar faces left; a couple of aging career professionals who were coming to the end of their tenure and of course, Agent Diana Berrigan and Special Agent Clinton Jones. Neal glanced over at a young woman who was busy working away at his old desk and he nodded at her, tipping his hat. She smiled back but it was obvious she hadn't a clue who he was. If she only knew what had transpired behind that desk for years: illicit phone calls, covert plans and more than a few underhanded manoeuvres by the CI who’d occupied it.

Clinton spotted them from his office atop the balustrade and came out to greet them. 

‘Come on up’ he called out to the two men.

Once upon a time, Neal might have bounded up the steps two at a time but he got a good grip of the railing and lumbered up, his back a little sore, if truth be told. The conference room looked pretty well the same except for some newer, high tech equipment, an even larger screen television and a newly installed cart in the corner of the room with a thermos of coffee, some mugs and a plate of danish.

‘Can I get you anything?’ Jones asked as he poured out some coffee. 

Once everyone was settled, he got to the point of the meeting.

‘Thanks for coming’ he began. ‘We’ve had a couple of really high profile cases lately and DC’s been really putting the squeeze on us.’

Peter nodded in understanding; he knew all too well the politics involved in running the White Collar division; when the bigwigs in DC told you to jump, all that was left was to ask ‘how high?’ 

‘But I’ve had this case on my desk for weeks now and I’m not making much headway’ Jones admitted. ‘I just don’t have the manpower or the time to give it the attention it deserves and I was thinking… well, it’s right up your alley, Neal.’

Neal leaned in, his curiosity definitely piqued. 

‘It all started with the owner of the Pruitt Gallery’ he said as Neal nodded.

‘Jim Greggson?’ Neal asked. He knew quite a few of the owners on the New York art scene, seeing as he was one of that elite group now.

‘No, Greggson sold it to a guy named Paul Robson last year’ Clinton clarified. ‘This Robson guy came to us claiming that one of the paintings he purchased from one of his art dealers is a copy but was sold to him as an original.’

‘Who’s the artist?’ Neal asked, the obvious question.

‘It’s a lesser known Pollock’ Jones said, pulling out a photograph of the painting.

Neal didn't recognize it but he took his time examining the photo. ‘Where’s the painting now?’

‘We’ve got it down in the evidence room. Did you want to go take a closer look?’

‘Sure’ Peter said, on the edge of his seat. ‘What about the art dealer? Is he reputable?’

‘Robson says he’s been dealing with three different dealers and his bookkeeping has been a little sloppy. He couldn't even tell us for sure where he’d gotten this piece from. It was already in the collection when he bought the place.’

‘So, what makes him think it’s a fake?’ Neal asked.

‘He claims to be a connoisseur of the genre and he’s convinced the painting is ‘off’’ Jones said, looking skeptical. ‘I said we’d look into it but… there’re just not enough hours in a day.’

Neal got to his feet. ‘Well, let’s take a look’ he said.

WCWCWC 

Sara hadn’t wanted to admit it but she’d had butterflies in her stomach since she’d arrived at the office that morning as she thought ahead to her meeting with Randall Piper. The trek to work had been horrendous, considering the winter storm which had hit overnight and getting a cab from the train had taken forever. Usually, she walked the five or so blocks to the office but the snow banks were huge and as it was, she’d made it to her desk a little later than usual, feeling uncharacteristically frazzled. 

At least, she’d managed to pull herself back together and as she examined herself in the washroom mirror, she had to admit she was rather pleased with the result. In preparation for her appointment with the rich new client, she’d gone out and purchased a brand new designer suit — and she’d blown a fair bit of money on it. If she was going to work with Randall Piper, she needed to look the part. 

She stared at her reflection in the mirror; she didn't look half bad for a woman in her mid-fifties… hell, she looked great for any age. The new two piece, tailored suit in midnight blue had a wide collar and a just above the knee pencil skirt with a slit up the back. The pale blue silk blouse she’d chosen to complement it looked incredible. She was standing in the executive washroom touching up her lipstick when Lydia Jordan walked in.

‘Wow! You look amazing. Two weeks off has done you a world of good, girl!’ she commented as she looked her friend up and down.

Sara shrugged it off but smiled in satisfaction; it was just the reaction she’d been hoping for.

To say that Sara Ellis was stylish and well put together was an understatement. She always looked great and her taste in clothing was impeccable but even by her high standards, this look was particularly flattering: just enough glam without being out of place in an office setting.

‘So, is all this for Mr. Piper’s benefit?’ Lydia teased, her finger pointing up and down the length of Sara’s body.

‘What?’ Sara replied with a frown. ‘Of course not. I just thought I’d treat myself to a new outfit, that’s all.’

‘Well, you look amazing’ Lydia replied, reaching into her handbag and pulling out her makeup bag. 

Sara brushed her off with a scoff. She glanced at her watch and gave herself one last glance in the mirror.

‘Wish me luck’ she called out over her shoulder as she walked out.

WCWCWC

‘So, what do you say? Do you have time for lunch?’ Peter asked as he and Neal stepped onto the elevator - a different one this time. 

They’d gone down to the evidence lockup and Neal had taken a good gander at the painting in question, unable to determine with any degree of confidence if the piece was a fake. Perhaps if he’d had them both side by side he would have been able to come to a definitive conclusion but without the benefit of the real thing - if indeed there was a real thing - he couldn't be sure. Nevertheless, they could do some digging, meet with the gallery owner, snoop around the art dealers he'd been doing business with. If there was a scam going on, it would be exciting to uncover it and bring those responsible to justice. Besides, it would be a welcome distraction from the humdrum routine of life at the gallery and at the school of art. Clinton had been beyond pleased to have them on board and he’d set them free, asking them to report as things developed. 

Neal hemmed and hawed in answer to Peter’s question. ‘Yeah, I don’t know. I was kind of thinking I’d surprise Sara for lunch, you know since I’m in the neighbourhood.’

Peter nodded and winked. ‘Oh, I get it. You in the doghouse? What did you do this time?’

‘What do you mean, what did I do? What makes you think I did anything?’ Neal said with a smirk of annoyance. How come Peter knew him so well?

‘It’s written all over your face’ Peter said with assurance. ‘What? Did she find out you came over to the gallery yesterday when you were supposed to be on a short leash, shopping for a new mattress?’

Neal scoffed. ‘Hope came home and mentioned it to Sara’ he finally admitted. 

Peter gave him a look of commiseration. 

Neal continued. ‘There’s that flower shop a few doors down from Sterling Bosch. I thought I could pick her up a nice bouquet and take her out to her favourite Indian place for lunch.’

‘That’s why you’re the master’ Peter said as he wagged his finger.

WCWCWC

The plan was pretty simple and straightforward: pick up the nicest bouquet of cut flowers he could find (the more exotic and expensive the better) and show up unannounced with a big grin on his face and an invitation to lunch. With their busy work lives, it seemed they hardly ever did impulsive things anymore. Sara would be thrilled. Neal could play it up, turn on the charm, tell her he couldn't wait until the end of the day to be with her again and she’d melt into a puddle of goo at the unexpected adulation. Then, everything would get back to normal. 

At least, that’s how it was playing in Neal’s mind.

If it hadn't been their first day back from the holidays, maybe he could even go a step further and sweep her off her feet. He could take her over to the Auden Bistro over at the Ritz Carlton for seafood, maybe even ditch work and blow a couple of hundred bucks on a deluxe room and really sweep her off her feet. 

He grinned widely as he rode the elevator up to the 31st floor, letting the fantasy take root. He had been planning on going to visit his mom and he’d intended to pop in at the school but, heck, this fantasy he had going felt like a lot more fun. 

It was just past noon when Neal arrived in the executive offices of Sterling Bosch. He immediately noticed that Sara’s assistant, Jenny Holden, whose office was just outside Sara’s, wasn’t at her desk. She was probably out having lunch considering her computer had been left on and there were files scattered all over her desk. The blinds in Sara’s glassed in office had been pulled down for privacy except for one pane on the far left side and Neal discreetly peeked in, noticing Sara sitting at the round table located in the far corner of her office, ostensibly talking to someone. She always looked amazing but this dark blue suit she’d pulled out of the closet this morning was simply gorgeous, the perfect complement to her raven hair. She’d pulled her hair up in a chignon - something she didn't do very often and she looked almost regal as she sat there, her long lean legs crossed at the ankles.

He took an additional step, his cheek practically plastered against the pane of glass as he attempted as inconspicuously as possible to get a better look, noticing a man sitting across from her… maybe a client, or a member of her team he’d never met before.

Neal settled in a chair in the outer office, patiently waiting for the meeting to come to an end, the large bouquet of flowers lying on his lap. The damn thing had cost him almost seventy-five bucks but it was worth it if he could finally get a sincere smile out of Sara.

Hopefully, he wouldn't be waiting too long; after all, they would have to come up for air at some point. Sara’s melodic voice could be heard echoing through the walls followed by a man’s deep baritone. Her speech seemed animated, not her usual ‘business’ voice and his ears perked up as he heard her laugh - not that polite, restrained laughter one might expect during a meeting but a resonant throaty laugh that she usually reserved just for him. If he didn't know better, he’d almost describe it as flirty. 

He leaned in to listen and heard the man’s quiet voice followed by rich, resonant laughter. Whatever this was, it didn't quite feel like a run of the mill business meeting. 

Neal frowned and got to his feet, unable to resist peeking in again. He set the flowers down on the side table and slithered up to the window surreptitiously so he could spy on what was going on without being seen. Sara was on her feet now, standing next to the man as they continued chatting. Her hand lay on the man’s arm and he moved his hand to rest on top of hers and squeezed. He said something and Neal heard Sara laugh again, deep and throaty. They started to move towards the door and Neal quickly returned to where he’d been sitting, grabbing for the bouquet and crossing his legs casually — without so much as an indication that seconds earlier, he’d been working diligently to hear what they’d been saying behind closed doors. 

The door to Sara’s office opened and she immediately spotted him, sitting there, the gorgeous bouquet of flowers on his lap.

‘Neal!’ she called out, surprised to find him sitting there. ‘What are you doing here?’

Her tone of voice took him totally by surprise - it wasn't the sound of delightful surprise he’d anticipated but rather a stern, scolding intonation as if he had no business being there. 

He got to his feet and smiled that put-on Caffrey smile of his that usually worked when he met someone for the first time. He looked from his wife to the man standing next to her and back to Sara. He would later wonder what possessed him to do what he did next. He moved in nice and close to his wife and brought his arm around her back, curling it around her waist possessively.

‘Hi darling’ he said, kissing her lightly on the cheek. ‘I thought I’d surprise you and take you out to lunch.’

Sara shot him a look of total disbelief. She couldn't fathom what he was doing there in the first place and… darling? Seriously… 

Meanwhile, Neal was checking out the man from the top of his head to the tip of his toes which he immediately noticed were clad in very expensive Italian leather. The man was beyond well dressed, his suit top of the line beyond anything Neal could ever afford on what he made at the gallery and the school of art. His hair was perfectly coiffed and his tie clip alone would have paid for a month’s groceries in the Caffrey home. Was that a freaking diamond he saw encrusted there? Oh no, it wasn’t - it was three diamonds.  
‘Neal Caffrey’ he said, putting out the hand which wasn't possessively wrapped around Sara’s waist. ‘I’m Sara’s husband.’

‘Ahh, you’re the lucky guy who won Sara’s heart’ the man said, his hand reaching for Neal’s and shaking it in a strong grip, obviously trying to get the upper hand. 

‘Randall Piper’ he said simply as if his name said it all.

It did, actually; the name immediately rang a bell with Neal although he didn't recall ever seeing a picture of him. What the hell was Randall Piper doing in Sara’s office and why were the two of them looking so chummy.

Sara had taken a couple of steps forward, forcing Neal’s hand to fall away - unless he held on to her which at this point, would have made him look pretty desperate. 

Randall Piper dismissed Neal totally and once again turned to look at Sara, leaning in to kiss her cheek. ‘Sara, it’s been wonderful seeing you again. I’ll call you about lunch, probably Thursday or Friday.’

‘Steve, it was nice to meet you’ he said, barely glancing at Neal.

Steve! Neal’s mouth dropped open, unable to speak and by the time his brain and his mouth reconnected, Randall Piper had already slipped out the door of the outer office and was halfway to the elevator.

‘Darling?’ Sara said, her eyebrows raised.

She was not amused. 

TBC


	17. Chapter 17

For all his usual strength of character and strong moral compass, Liam Theodore Caffrey had come to the realization that his body — more precisely those parts located between his waist and his knees — had flat out betrayed him. When he woke late Monday morning, he was once again lying in the arms of the blonde cyclone who was responsible for turning his life upside down. Not only had he been incapable of coming clean to Todd about what had happened while he'd been in New York and the doubts he’d been having about their relationship, he’d actually let the guy back into his bed the moment they’d returned to the dorm after dinner the previous night. 

A feeling of dread overcame him as he woke, feeling sore in all the right places and his faith in himself all but destroyed.

How could he be so weak? Had he already forgotten about what had happened with Cody? What was it he really wanted? And once he figured that out, did he have the cojones to make it happen?

He needed some space to think things through; everything had seemed a lot clearer when he wasn't in Todd Greenway’s immediate orbit. He glanced down at the sleeping man, noticing the satisfied smile on his face as he slept. He sure was one hot looking guy Liam thought as he felt himself start to stir. 

Luckily, Josh was headed back to Syracuse and would be there by the end of the day. His arrival would put the kibosh on these nightly visits from Todd and help create some badly needed space between the young lovers. That would certainly help curtail temptation. That being said, he couldn't count on his roomie’s role as cock blocker to determine the future of his relationship with his current boyfriend. He had to stand up for himself and set his own limits otherwise, he feared, he might be spending the foreseeable future in bed with the young stud.

Sooner or later, he’d have to man up and make a decision about the future - the right decision for him.

Todd stirred and opened his eyes, looking over longingly at Liam. ‘Good morning, lover’ he cooed, arms reaching out.

Liam frowned in an attempt to stay focussed. Then, just as quickly, he melted into the other man’s warm embrace.

WCWCWC

In the end, there was no lunch at that Indian place, no secret rendezvous at the Ritz Carlton, no smile, no peck on the cheek, not even a thank you for that expensive bunch of flowers. 

There was simply a dismissive ‘we’ll talk about it when I get home’ and Neal had been sent on his way like a child being banished to his room without dinner. 

What the hell?

The plan had been pretty well idiot proof and still, he’d managed to screw it up by pulling that stupid stunt… flexing his muscles and puffing out his chest like a proud peacock. 

Darling… What the hell had he been thinking? 

What was he worried about, anyway? So, Sara was in her office with a great looking, super rich dude who could buy her anything her little heart desired and she’d had her hands all over him — so what? And since when had he turned into a jealous, insecure, possessive husband anyway? 

He was Neal Caffrey. 

And Neal Caffrey didn't do jealous.

He gave the steering wheel a punishing slap as he stared out at the traffic ahead and replayed the events of the last hour. He still couldn't figure out what had possessed him to behave so primitively, taking a wide stance, staring the other man down and threading his arm around Sara like she was some sort of beautiful possession he could show off. It was no wonder she’d gotten pissed off; you didn't treat any woman, let alone a woman like Sara Ellis, like a piece of property.

Sara was his wife, his life partner, his lover, his best friend, the mother of his children; their relationship was rock solid and had been for going on twenty-five years. She’d never given him any reason to doubt her devotion to him and he hoped he’d done the same for her. Most importantly, although they loved each other, wanted each other, craved each other’s touch and enjoyed each other’s company, they remained, above all, strong, self-sufficient individuals in their own right, neither one subordinate to the other.

Watching her through the glass as she laughed with abandon while her hands were all over another man had set him off, releasing all his irrational insecurities. Did Sara behave that way with all her clients? Had she been flirting or was she just being friendly? And what did the guy mean when he said ‘It was great to see you again, Sara’? Regardless of the answers to those questions, he was going to have to get a grip; swooping in and acting all macho was not a course of action that would find favour with the likes of Sara Ellis. 

What was with this guy? Sara was a married woman and he should know better than to flirt openly with her for crying out loud. In front of her husband, of all people!

He caught a fleeting glance of himself in the rear view mirror and frowned, noticing new crows feet appearing in the corner of his eyes and that persistent grey at his temples. Randall Piper didn't appear to have any grey at all; he’d had thick, dark wavy hair and no sign of wrinkles as far as Neal could tell. He’d looked to be about Neal’s age and he’d appeared robust, solid, a couple of inches taller than Neal, a little more muscular. Probably had a lot more time for working out — the perks of being a millionaire, Neal reflected with a touch of envy. And everybody knew those rich guys had regular botox injections - probably had his plastic surgeon on speed dial.

But more than anything, what had pushed Neal over the edge was the mirthful sound of Sara’s laughter and the excitement dancing in her eyes as she’d chatted with the man. She used to get that look in her eyes all the time. 

When she looked at him. 

What had happened lately to their lives? Why did everything feel so boring and tedious? Did this happen to all couples as they entered mid-life? How did you keep things fresh and exciting in a marriage after nearly twenty-five years?

One thing was certain. Life wasn't worth living without Sara by his side; that much Neal had figured out years ago. Perhaps it had been the realization that someone could walk in and sweep her off her feet at a moments notice that had pushed him to behave so irrationally. The fact that Sara was beautiful and desirable wasn't up for debate but Neal had never had any doubts as to her loyalty and commitment to him and to their family. Why then couldn't he stop wondering why she’d looked at Randall Piper that way? The way she used to look at him. 

He turned into the parking lot of the Blue Skies Nursing Home and shut off the car engine, reaching for his phone. He brought it up to eye level and squinted at the screen.

‘Damn it’ he cursed impatiently as he reached into his pocket for his reading glasses. Randall Piper probably didn't need reading glasses.

He googled the man, watching as his smiling face came up on his screen. He googled his age, his net worth, his height and weight, his marital status. 

Divorced, three times. 

Neal smiled in satisfaction. Apparently, the guy couldn't hang onto a woman to save his life. He, on the other hand, had kept the same woman happy for nearly twenty-five years, no small feat, he thought smugly. He put the phone down and thought of Sara.

She’d been pretty pissed off when she’d dismissed him. Now, all he could do was let this all play out on her terms. Flowers and grand gestures weren’t going to make this go away. Sara would need a little time to cool down and after she’d finished venting, she’d likely be amenable to his sincerest of apologies. He resolved to be ready when the time came. In the meantime, he needed to tame the caveman who, until today, had been lying dormant. Petulant outbursts of jealousy were one sure way of pushing his wife away — and perhaps straight into someone else’s waiting arms.

He turned his thoughts back to his mom and stepped out of the car and into the nursing home. 

WCWCWC

The bouquet of fragrant flowers taunted her, filling her office with its amazing scent and drawing her gaze away from her computer screen. That damn thing must have set Neal back a few bucks, Sara reflected.

Good! she thought spitefully.

Her blood was still boiling following her husband’s earlier display of unbridled virility and machismo. What could have possibly possessed him to behave that way: showing up unannounced and highjacking such an important meeting only to carry on like a neanderthal, dragging his mate into his cave by the hair while latching on to his club. That wasn't like Neal. He’d never been the possessive type, never needed to flex his muscles; he was much too secure in himself and in their relationship for that.

If anything, over the years, she’d had a lot more cause to be jealous than he had. Neal was a chick magnet and he didn't hesitate to use his effusive charm with both men and women, flirting shamelessly right under her nose. And yet, she’d learned to embrace that unrestrained, exuberant part of his personality; it just meant all the more to think that she’d been the one to capture his heart and keep him interested for the better part of a quarter century.

Neal’s unannounced visit to the office had really rattled her and she wasn't quite sure why she’d reacted so vehemently. She hadn't told him about Randall Piper’s impending visit and the fact that the man was considering bringing his business over to Sterling Bosch. If she could bring Randall Piper on board as a client, it would be a major coup; with someone of his calibre, Sterling Bosch’s reputation would soar and Sara would probably be able to write her own ticket with the bigwigs. He was worth millions and his business would be a huge boost for the company. 

Normally, she would have been excited to share that kind of news with Neal - it was a big deal after all and Neal delighted in his wife’s successes as she celebrated his. Why had she chosen to hold back this time? The answer, once the question was clearly formed in her mind, surprised her somewhat. Telling Neal about her prospective meeting with Randall Piper would have meant opening a whole can of worms about their past relationship, something she seemed reluctant to do. 

Of course, Neal knew she’d had other relationships before they’d gotten together, some more serious than others. He knew all about Bryan McKenzie and her brief engagement to the man. And he knew about her affair with Craig Williamson during her third year of university, she’d even told him all about her first love, Marshall Cooper, the quarterback of her high school football team who’d deflowered her in the back seat of his Ford Tempo.

But her affair with Randy had never come up in conversation. It had been an intense but short liaison and it had been overshadowed by the one true tragedy in her life: the sudden death of her parents. So, why was she reticent about sharing this particular relationship with her husband?

Perhaps it was in deference to the fact that Neal had left behind the potential for a life of privilege when he’d married her. Going straight hadn't been easy for the ex con and going on and on about her affair with a man who’d become a multi-millionaire might rub Neal the wrong way. If Randy did decide to bring his business over to Sterling Bosch, she would be called on to work closely with him while things were set up. He’d already made it clear that he would only deal with her - no one else. That might be difficult for Neal to accept… but he was a reasonable man, he’d understand; it was just business after all. 

Or was it? There was something else under the surface that Sara hadn't been quite ready to admit, even to herself. Preparing to see Randy and actually coming face to face with him after more than thirty years had set her heart aflutter. He was smart, successful, easy on the eyes and filthy rich. Ever since she’d heard his name mentioned the previous week, Sara had been imagining how she might feel when she finally laid eyes on him. Would there be a spark when they came face to face after all these years?

Maybe it had to do with the fact that she was turning fifty-six in another few months and that she’d noticed a couple of stray grey hairs when she’d last checked to say nothing of those pesky wrinkles around her mouth and the corners of her eyes. Lately, her life had grown boring and humdrum. She and Neal were always busy with work and of course, the kids. To top it off, their love life, which had always been plenty passionate, had become ho hum lately, lacking in the excitement they’d once had. Neal was always tired and he’d had trouble performing his husbandly duties lately as he adapted to his blood pressure medication. It seemed that all they ever talked about was their jobs and the kids - and there was very little time left for just the two of them.

Regardless of the reason, she had to admit it had been nice to have a man other than Neal look at her that way, not as a mom or a colleague or a friend but as a woman. Not that she had any intention of acting on it… it was just… flattering to think she could still be attractive to someone other than her husband — whose job it was to find her attractive. 

To be honest, maybe she had been flirting with Randy. Just a little. She’d certainly tried to keep things professional but Randy was easy to talk to and they’d seamlessly wandered down memory lane, reminiscing about those months they’d spent together, all those late nights of studying followed by lazy mornings as they lay in each other’s arms. He’d confided about his latest divorce, bemoaning the difficulty he'd had over the years finding a woman who understood his drive to excel. Was he hinting that maybe Sara was the one who got away?

She walked over to the table, letting her hands linger mindlessly on the bouquet of flowers. There were roses, orchids, moonflowers. Neal sure knew her tastes. He always knew exactly what she liked. 

She felt a small twinge of guilt as she recalled how she’d dismissed him so offhandedly, recalling his sweet face as he’d sat there with his puppy dog eyes and that humongous bouquet of flowers in his lap. He drove her crazy and she was feeling torn: still annoyed at him but a little remorseful for the way she’d treated him. 

As she struggled with the conflicting emotions, she heard her phone ping and turned to look at the screen. Randy was texting to suggest they meet up for lunch on Thursday to continue discussing his insurance needs.

Sara sighed and prepared to respond. 

WCWCWC

Neal had been sitting by his mom’s side for going on an hour and she was still sound asleep. He’d begun by reading to her from the book of poems by Maya Angelou that sat on her night stand. Linda didn't respond but he thought he saw a fleeting smile on a couple of occasions.

After a while, he put the book down and started into a monologue about the kids; how Caitlin seemed to be settling down, how Liam was back at school but struggling with his love life, how Hope was preparing to visit her future in-laws. He segued into the fact that he thought Hope and Cameron were preparing to announce their wedding date soon and how he hoped she’d be better by then and able to attend. Even as he said the words, Neal realized that was probably not going to happen. 

Linda continued snoozing peacefully, the room quiet.

The next thing he knew, he was confiding about what had just transpired over at Sara’s office.

‘We had an argument last night’ he began, his hand holding hers. ‘About mattress shopping, of all things. And we went to bed angry. I hate that, Mom. I hate when we go to sleep mad. It doesn’t feel right and I never sleep well when I know Sara’s pissed off at me. Anyway, this morning, I thought I’d try to make it up to her. I thought why don't I take her out for a nice lunch at one of her favourite places so I headed over to her office to surprise her. I picked up some flowers on the way over, all her favourites… but when I got there, she was in a meeting with some guy so… I sat in the outer office and waited.’

Linda lay perfectly still, her face relaxed as she slept.

‘Okay, I didn’t really sit and wait. I couldn't help myself… I peeked into the office to see who she was with. It was some snazzy looking guy, about my age but no grey hair, you know. He was leaning in, talking to her… looking like he thought the sun shone out of her ass.’

Neal sighed loudly and shook his head. ‘It’s stupid, I know… Sara’s a beautiful woman and plenty of men look at her and I’ve never been the jealous type. I think I was more upset about the way she was looking at him… she looked really happy, she was laughing, her face was relaxed and animated… I haven't seen her like that in a while. You know, things have been so busy lately with the kids being home for Christmas and everything. It just feels like… well, like we’re just going through the motions.’

He looked down at Linda, making sure she was asleep before continuing and he let his voice drop a little even though it was obvious she was dead to the world.

‘Even our… sex life’ he whispered. ‘It seems a little… mechanical lately. I’ve been having a little trouble with some of the meds the doctor put me on and… anyway, things have been a little off. But when I saw her in the office, laughing with this guy… I started to feel envious that he was making her laugh when that should be me… and he was getting the laughter that was rightfully mine.’

He stopped for a moment. ‘Okay, that sounds stupid. Sara can laugh with whoever she want to laugh with. We each have our own lives, our own friendships, our own interests but… we always keep the best of ourselves for each other, you know. At least, that’s what I thought until I saw her fawning over this guy’ he said with a sigh.

‘So, they step out of Sara’s office and I moved in on her like a predator… like a carnivore on a two inch thick steak… I put my arms around her. ‘Hi darling’ I said like I was some movie star in a 1950’s Doris Day movie. Darling? Can you believe it. Sara and I always used to laugh at that word, it sounds so… so fucking domesticated. I just wanted the guy to know not to mess with her, that she was mine… like she was some sort of possession of mine. And then, I gave him this big phoney smile and I put out my hand. ‘Neal Caffrey’ I said, in a deep voice. ‘I’m Sara’s husband’. 

‘I’m Sara’s husband’ Neal repeated, shaking his head. ‘Like I needed him to know… she’s mine, keep your eyes and hands to yourself. You know, I didn't even give her a chance to introduce us, I just jumped in like some… some jealous, overbearing… insecure husband.’

‘Anyway, Sara gave me this look like ‘Seriously? You’re really doing this? You’re really horning in on my business meeting to thump your chest like some wild crazy man. What are you going to do next? Pull it out and compare sizes?’ 

Linda sighed softly in her sleep but her eyes didn't open. ‘I can’t blame her for being upset, Mom. What if she showed up at the school when I was in the middle of a meeting with one of my teachers and started hanging off me… calling me darling. I’d be pretty pissed off, too.’

Neal gazed at his mom, looking so peaceful and he squeezed her hand lovingly. ‘So anyway, all I can do now is give her a little space and hope she comes around. I can’t believe I’m still messing up at my age. You’d think I’d have this marriage stuff figured out by now.’

His gaze narrowed as he thought back to the most irksome part of his short introduction to Randall Piper. ‘Oh, and get this’ he said, his voice growing a little louder. ‘He called me Steve! Steve! In what universe does ‘Neal’ sound like ‘Steve’? I swear to God, the guy did it on purpose just to bring me down a peg.’

Linda eyes drifted open and she squeezed his hand just as he’d done a moment before. ‘Hi Neal’ she murmured softly. ‘Honey, Sara loves you. She’ll come around.’

Neal’s jaw dropped open in embarrassment. How much of his little rant had she actually heard?

‘Mom… I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you’ he said softly, leaning in to place a kiss on her forehead.

Her response took him by surprise. ‘I wasn’t sleeping, honey. I was just resting my eyes.’

WCWCWC

Sara sat on the train, thinking back to her meeting with Randy Piper. He was just as she’d remembered: attractive, witty, charming. She was looking forward to working closely with him as they worked the details out for his contract with Sterling Bosch. It sure as hell broke up the monotony of everyday life. He’d said something about having her visit all his properties so she could properly evaluate all his art and jewelry. He had three residences, one in New York, another in the Hamptons and a third place in Chicago where he did most of his business.

She touched her cheek, realizing she was blushing. Blushing. Sara Ellis, age fifty-five, was blushing as she thought ahead to the excitement of this new adventure.

Then there was Neal. She’d treated him pretty shabbily but yet, he’d acted like a neanderthal.

She sighed.

WCWCWC

Neal made it home first, despite his little side trip to New Rochelle. The house was quiet, too quiet. Caitlin was working late and Hope had left a note saying she was out for the evening with Cameron. 

Stepping into a dark house was disheartening and Neal quickly endeavoured to put a little life into the place. He turned on some lights, put on some music and spent a few minutes with Raffie, letting him out into the backyard and putting out food and fresh water for the family pooch.

He removed his suit jacket, threw it on the back of one of the kitchen chairs and he turned his mind to making dinner. It was going on seven o’clock and Sara would be starved when she finally made it home. Unless, of course, she’d run off with this guy to parts unknown.

Neal forced the silly thought away.

The fridge offered little in the way of inspiration but there was some fresh asparagus and a red pepper in the crisper and Neal quickly settled on a couple of cheese and vegetable omelets along with a small salad and some homemade cheese biscuits on the side. He set everything out on the counter and was preparing to run upstairs to get changed when he heard the dog barking; seemingly, he’d finished his business. Raffie wasn’t big on staying out in the cold any longer than necessary so Neal let him in, wagging his finger at him.

‘Don’t touch anything’ he warned as the dog lay his head down on the floor in an act of submission. ‘I’m going up to change.’

There wasn't much danger of him doing any damage - vegetables just weren't his thing.

Neal trotted up the stairs to change out of his suit turning on light switches as he went. He pulled on an old pair of sweatpants and was reaching for a t-shirt when he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. Randall Piper probably had a silk smoking jacket, he thought grudgingly. Surely, he wouldn't be caught dead in such a shabby get-up. He reached down and pulled the sweats off; maybe he could try a little harder. He found a pair of faded jeans in the bottom drawer of his dresser and pulled them out, searching the drawer for a decent shirt - with actual buttons. He found a somewhat wrinkled polo shirt and pulled it on just as he heard the door open downstairs and the sound of Sara dropping her briefcase.

He took one last look in the mirror, ran a hand through his hair and prepared to go downstairs. 

It seemed his tornado in heels was home.

TBC


	18. Chapter 18

‘Neal?’ Dr. Joanne Cooper said, leaning in.   
He’d stopped talking all of a sudden, his eyes avoiding hers.

‘Was there something else? What about that little problem you were having with maintaining an erection?’ 

Neal blushed. Dr. Cooper had always been a straight shooter, no matter how delicate the topic.

‘Yeah…’ he began, hesitant. ‘Not quite sure if that’s… completely resolved.’ 

‘This new medication should be better for that but until your body gets used to it, you might continue to experience some headaches’ the woman explained.

Neal nodded. ‘I… I’m not used to having problems… like that’ he admitted.

Dr. Cooper looked down at his file, lying across her desk. ‘You know Neal, there’s an increased chance of erectile dysfunction as you age. I see you turned sixty on your last birthday. Welcome to the club.’

Neal gave her an insincere smile; he could have done with not being part of this particular club.

‘What? Like you mean I could be having this problem… for good?’ he asked, his voice panicked. Getting it up and keeping it there had never been a problem before and he sure as hell didn't want it to become one now.

‘No, that’s not what I said’ Dr. Copper explained patiently. ‘What I said is that there is an increased chance of erectile dysfunction as you get older; I didn't say that everyone over a certain age suffers from it. But your age plus the fact that we haven't managed to get your blood pressure completely under control are both contributing factors.’

Neal frowned; not the news he’d been hoping to hear.

‘Is it getting an erection you’re having trouble with or maintaining it?’ she asked point blank.

Neal cringed; did they really need to discuss this delicate issue in such elaborate detail? 

‘Maintaining’ he mumbled, looking away.

She nodded and made a note in his file.

‘I’m hoping this new dose I’ve put you on will help with that. Why don’t we try that for the next few weeks and see how it goes?’ she suggested. ‘And if your headaches get worse, come back and see me.’

Neal nodded and smiled, obviously embarrassed. 

‘Neal, you know, you’re not the first man to struggle with erectile dysfunction. It’s a pretty common thing. As soon as we get your blood pressure under control, we could look at prescribing something to treat it if it doesn't go away on its own’ she stated matter of factly.

‘What? Like Viagra?’ Neal asked, growing increasingly upset.

‘Or Cialis or any number of other PDE5 inhibitors’ she replied.

‘Shit’ Neal said under his breath.

‘You may find that once we get your blood pressure stabilized, the problem will simply disappear’ she added in an effort to reassure him.

Neal shook his head and sighed. ‘I took Viagra for a short while after I got shot about six years ago. I was having trouble with sensation and…’

‘Did you respond well?’ she asked.

‘Yeah’ Neal replied. ‘It worked.’

‘Well, let’s not get ahead of ourselves, shall we? I’ll see you again in six weeks and we’ll see how you’re doing then. Are you still taking your blood pressure every day at home?’

Neal nodded.

‘Then keep doing that and we’ll look at your numbers next time you're in.’

Neal got to his feet, grabbing for his coat. 

‘So, how’s Sara doing?’ Dr. Cooper asked. 

‘She’s good… busy at work.’

‘Well, tell her I said hi and that she’s overdue for a physical.’

‘Will do’ Neal said, turning to leave.

He scurried out of the office and through the waiting room, as if the reason for his visit to Dr. Cooper’s office was stamped on his forehead for all to see. 

‘Erectile dysfunction’ he mumbled under his breath as he made his way to the car. Randall Piper probably didn't have any trouble keeping it up.

WCWCWC

Some twenty-four hours after his little blunder, the antagonism between Neal and his wife had begun to dissipate. They had graduated from the ‘pass the salt’ phase to a more civilized closed mouth peck on the cheek by the time Neal came home from his visit to the doctor’s office. 

They still hadn’t worked things out but Neal could tell Sara was beginning to warm to the idea of a truce. Frankly, he didn't want another night of her settling into bed with her back to him; he was looking forward to things returning to normal. Besides, he needed a good night’s sleep.

Sara was already home, doing her best to pull something together for dinner when Neal stepped into the house. He recognized the familiar aroma of Italian spices as he stepped into the foyer and he heard some muffled sounds coming from upstairs; one of the girls was probably home.

‘Hi!’ Sara called out as he appeared in the kitchen.

She stood by the stove, stirring something and looking out of place as she always did when she attempted to do anything more than throw a salad together. A greeting, as brief as this one was infinitely better than the cold shoulder he’d been getting.

‘Hey’ Neal replied, making his way over to check on what was in the pot. 

Sara leaned in to place a kiss on his cheek without a word and Neal just went with it. Definitely progress.

‘So, how did it go with Dr. Cooper?’ she asked, leaning against the kitchen counter to get a better look at him - just in case he tried to be evasive which was decidedly his style.

He pulled off his jacket and threw it aside, his eyes temporarily breaking contact with hers. ‘Fine’ he attempted, knowing full well the conversation wasn't going to end there.

He was thankful they were finally talking - although the subject left a lot to be desired. 

‘Did she change your medication?’ she asked, scrutinizing him.

‘She upped it a little’ he said, looking in the fridge and coming up with a bottle of sparkling water.

‘Was your blood pressure still high?’

‘It was… I think the word she used was borderline normal’ Neal admitted.

‘Did you tell her about the headaches you’ve been getting?’

He nodded. ‘She said they’ll probably fade once my system gets used to the new dosage.’

‘Did you tell her about… that other thing?’ Sara asked as delicately as she could. It was definitely a sore point and, even though she was still pissed off at him for his behaviour in her office, she didn't see any point in humiliating him when it came to his sexual prowess - or lack thereof.

Neal moved over to check the stove once more. He grabbed the wooden spoon and gave the spaghetti sauce a quick stir. ‘Is this the leftover sauce from the weekend or did you take a new batch out of the freezer?’

‘Neal’ she said, her voice a warning for him to stop stalling. 

He rubbed his temples, feigning a headache and she relented and actually brought her hand to rest on his back.

‘I’m going to go change, okay?’ he said, looking defeated.

‘All right’ Sara replied. She’d try to get more out of him later. ‘Do you want to tell Caitlin I’m putting the pasta on and dinner will be ready in ten minutes.’

‘Okay’ he muttered, turning to leave. 

His shoulders drooped and as if he knew what was going on, Raffie sauntered over to sniff him and followed his master up the stairs. 

It looked like the guy needed a friend.

WCWCWC

By bedtime, Sara had started up on him again, wanting more in the way of information about his doctor’s appointment. Perhaps he could use her receptivity to begin a more productive conversation — one that would serve to bridge the chasm that had developed between them. He waited until they were both in bed and he opened up his arms to her, hoping she’d take him up on his offer of a cuddle. He was more than pleased when she gave him an eye roll and a sigh and, without a word, lay her head down on his chest.

Neal cleared his throat. ‘Are you ready to talk?’ he asked.

Sara leaned up on her elbow and looked down at him expectantly. ‘I suppose’ she said, a little curtly.

‘Sara, I’m sorry… about what happened yesterday’ he began; it was always good to start with an apology if your end game was to be forgiven. 

As much as he’d spurned making apologies in his conman days, they were extremely useful in his life as husband to Sara Ellis - the more sincere, the better.

‘Honey, I really don’t know what came over me. When I got to your office, I could hear your voice through the door. I heard you laughing and… then I heard… him laughing and… I peeked in and I could see the two of you standing by the door and you had your hand on his arm and then I saw him put his hand on yours.’

He stopped and waited to see if she would offer up an explanation for what he'd seen but Sara just kept staring at him, waiting for him to go on.

‘I… the way you were looking at him, the way he was looking at you… it was just… I don't know Sara, it just bothered me.’

‘Bothered you?’ Sara repeated, incredulous.

Neal shrugged; he was trying his best to be candid about how he’d felt, to get them back to a place of truth and honesty. 

‘I mean, I’ve never seen you act like that with any of your other clients or your staff for that matter.’

Sara let her head drop onto his chest once more in an attempt to keep him from seeing the truth in her eyes, to keep him from seeing that she hadn't been totally honest with him. She took a few quiet breaths before deciding it was time to come clean. 

‘Honey, Randy and I knew each other… years ago’ she said, her voice quiet.

‘Randy?’ Neal repeated.

She forced herself to look at her husband. ‘We dated in university’ she said, cutting to the chase.

‘You and Randall Piper? You used to date?’

‘Yeah. It was during my second year. Just before my parents died.’

‘But you never mentioned him before’ Neal said, his eyes narrowing.

Sara shrugged. ‘It never came up. I wasn't keeping it from you… not exactly. I just… it didn't last that long, maybe six months.’

‘Why didn't you tell me?’ Neal asked, hurt. ‘You must have known you were meeting with him yesterday.’

Sara took a moment to think; technically, he was right. She had purposely kept it from him although her reasons for doing so were still unclear - even to her. How could she possibly explain things to him when she wasn't sure what she’d been feeling herself?

‘Last week, Lydia called and she told me he’d been in touch and wanted to discuss moving his business over to Sterling Bosch. He said he would only meet with me.’

Neal nodded, doing his best to understand. ‘I wish you’d told me. Why’d you keep it from me?’

‘I don’t know. I should have mentioned it’ she agreed. ‘But, Neal, that doesn't give you the right to come barging in —’

He interrupted. ‘I know, Sara, I know. I had no business barging in like a lunatic and acting all…’

‘Macho? Virile? Caveman-like?’ Sara said with a grin.

Neal joined in, smiling despite himself. ‘Yeah… caveman-like. I guess my reaction was a little over the top’ he admitted grudgingly.

‘You think?’ Sara said, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

‘You just looked so cozy and I… you know, I’m not really sure why I reacted that way’ Neal admitted. ‘I’m sorry.’

She leaned in and placed a tender kiss on his lips and his smile widened in response.

‘So… darling…’ she said with an amused glint in her eye. ‘Are you going to tell me about what happened with Dr. Cooper?’

Neal let out a long slow breath. Great! Now he had to admit to his wife that their love life might be on the skids indefinitely; just another reason to push her right into somebody else’s arms. 

‘She said… sometimes it happens with high blood pressure and if I can get my BP under control, this other thing should go away.’

Sara listened. She knew it was a sore spot for Neal - for any man, really. Most guys’ self esteem was closely linked to their performance in the sack and sadly, Neal Caffrey was no different. She needed to be sensitive to that.

‘That’s good news, isn't it?’ she said, trying to sound upbeat.

She could feel his body tensing underneath her. ‘She said that if it doesn't get resolved by itself over the next few weeks, she could prescribe something for it’ he added, looking embarrassed.

‘You mean like Viagra?’ she asked.

‘Yeah.’

‘Honey, that’s no big deal’ Sara said reassuringly. ‘A lot of men suffer from… you know, a lot of men struggle with it. Didn't you tell me Peter took Viagra?’

Neal scoffed. ‘Peter’s seventy-three years old, babe’ he stated. ‘I’m not even sixty-one.’

He looked demoralized and Sara couldn't bring herself to add to his misery by continuing to give him the cold shoulder. The guy obviously needed a little encouragement and some TLC. He’d atoned for his little misdeed from the previous day and she had no interest in keeping him on the hook for it. To be honest, she hadn't been one hundred percent in the right either.

She ran her hand down his cheek. ‘Honey… it’s going to be fine’ she said reassuringly. 

He didn't look convinced but he pulled her into him, delighting in the warmth of her body against his.

‘I loved the flowers, by the way’ she said as he smiled a satisfied smile.

‘They cost me a bundle so don’t go crazy when we get the Visa bill’ he replied with a chuckle.

‘Maybe we can go for lunch next week sometime’ she suggested, an olive branch. ‘Make up for yesterday.’

‘That’d be nice’ Neal concurred.

‘You never did tell me, how did it go with Jones yesterday?’ she asked.

‘He asked us to look into a case he doesn't have time for. A gallery owner in the garment district seems to think one of his dealers slipped him a forgery.’

Sara loved intrigue. ‘Really?’

‘Peter and I are going to look into it. Meet with the gallery owner and the dealers, see if we can get to the bottom of it’ Neal said, his fingers lazily running up and down his wife’s arm.

‘Isn’t that an awful lot for Peter to take on?’

‘Nawww. He loves this stuff’ Neal replied.

‘Yeah, but you said it yourself, he’s seventy-three. It’s just a question of time before he feels the need to slow down and stop working altogether’ Sara said, laying the groundwork for Peter’s eventual announcement.

‘Peter? No way! He loves working at the gallery. He says it keeps him young’ Neal replied, sounding awfully sure of himself.

‘Yeah, but honey, El told me she’s selling Burke Premiere Events. Don’t you think they’ll want to spend some time together, relax, travel?’

‘I can’t see that happening for a looong time’ Neal replied. ‘Peter would be bored out of skull if he didn't have the gallery.’

‘I’m just saying…’ Sara said, letting the idea take root.

Neal’s mind was already wandering elsewhere… back to Randall Piper and his wife. 

‘So when do you see Peter Piper again?’ he asked, unable to keep from making fun of the man’s name. 

Sara gave him a playful slap on the chest. ‘We’re meeting for lunch on Thursday’ she said, looking into his eyes. ‘Are you okay with that?’

He put on a brave face and smiled but she could see it was still a sore point for him; they’d just have to find a way to work through it. 

‘Of course I am’ he said dismissively. ‘It’s your job. This is a huge account.’

Sara let out a sigh, relieved at his response. ‘It is. Mr. Bosch was thrilled.’

Neal squeezed her shoulder, pressing her against his tired body and placing a kiss on the top of her head. 

‘Atta go, Repo’ he whispered. ‘I’m proud of you.’

‘Thanks honey’ Sara murmured.

And just like that, the Caffreys were back on track. 

Or at least they thought they were.

WCWCWC

‘That is gorgeous’ Liam enthused as he studied the watch. ‘It must have cost your parents a fortune.’

Josh Monteith took the piece of jewelry from his friend’s hand and returned it to his wrist. ‘My folks always go nuts with Christmas gifts. I guess that’s what happens when your birthday happens to be on the same day. Double presents!’

Liam returned to sit on his bed, facing his friend. ‘So you had a good time, then?’

‘Yeah, my brother announced he and his boyfriend are getting married this summer’ Josh said, beaming. ‘And get this. I’m going to be his best man.’

‘Cool!’ Liam replied.

‘What about you? How was your trip to New York?’

‘White Plains’ Liam corrected.

‘Technically, it’s a suburb of New York’ Josh argued.

‘It was good… busy. I got to spend time with my sister and my folks and my grandmother. I saw my uncle Moz and my best friend Will and I got together with some of my old high school friends.’

‘What about Cody? Did you see him?’ Josh asked, settling on the bed across from Liam’s. 

‘Yeah, I bumped into him at a New Year’s Eve party.’

‘And…’

Liam got to his feet and walked over to his desk, pretending to fiddle with a couple of books. Josh was like his conscience, always digging for answers Liam wasn't always ready to face. It was the price of confiding in someone; it worked both ways. 

‘It was okay, it was a little strained.’

‘Come on Liam, don’t hold out on me.’

Liam looked at his roomie and shrugged. ‘I don’t think I’m really over him, Josh’ he admitted.

‘Did you tell him that?’

‘Sort of… yeah, I told him but I didn't get the reaction I was hoping for. I also told him I’d been dating Todd but… I don’t know, things kind of went to shit after that.’

Josh could sense the tension emanating off his roommate. ‘What do you mean?’

‘He more or less made it clear that he didn't want to get together if I was seeing someone else but then again… no promises so… What am I supposed to do?’

‘Well, how do you feel about Todd? It seems to me every time you talk about him, you’re complaining about how needy and pushy he is.’

‘I know, I know. But he’s…’

‘Hot’ Josh said as Liam sighed.

‘Yeah and available’ he admitted.

It seemed so cheesy saying it out loud but besides the great sex, what did he have in common with Todd Greenway?

‘Doesn’t sound like much of a basis for a relationship’ Josh commented.

‘Says the guy who encouraged me to go out with him in the first place.’

‘I thought it’d be fun for you to get out. The only time you leave this room is to go to practice or to class.’

‘Or the library’ Liam added as Josh rolled his eyes.

‘Or the library’ he conceded. ‘You’re going to have to decide if the distraction is worth it. If you ask me, you don't look all that happy about spending time with him.’

‘I am’ Liam argued, trying to convince himself as much as anything else. ‘When I’m in the moment.’

‘You mean when you’re in the sack’ Josh said, calling him on his crap. ‘Look, if that’s all you’re looking for —’

Right on cue the door handle rattled and there was a rather loud knock on the door. ‘Hey, hotstuff! The door’s locked, open up’ came the familiar voice.

Liam looked at his roommate with a look of pure panic in his eyes.

‘What do you want me to do? Hide you under my sweater? Tell him you left town?’ Josh asked mockingly. ‘You’re going to have to deal with this one on your own, buddy.’

WCWCWC

‘So what made you choose this place?’ Peter asked as he and Neal settled on a leather banquette across from each other.

‘I don’t know’ Neal said with a mischievous smile. ‘I just thought it would be a nice change, we always seem to go to the same places. And I know how much you like your meat and potatoes.’ 

The high end steak house was located about halfway between the Raphael and the offices of Sterling Bosch. They must have driven past it dozens of times over the years but until now, it had never caught Neal’s attention. It was beyond busy and he had wisely suggested they get there before noon to make sure to get a table. He knew Peter wouldn't be able to resist the lure of a nice juicy porterhouse steak and a baked potato slathered with sour cream. 

His actual reason for suggesting they eat there was slightly more devious and had very little to do with the restaurant’s excellent reputation for steaks and ribs. The truth was, Neal had peeked in Sara’s daybook, noticing the entry for lunch with Randall Piper. He’d convinced himself he wasn't actually spying on her, he just happened to be out enjoying lunch with his best friend at the same restaurant where Sara was meeting her new client. 

He’d keep a safe distance this time, say a polite hello if their eyes met but he wouldn't be making a spectacle of himself - not like he had a few days earlier. This was a win-win situation. He didn't trust this guy as far as he could throw him and this would be an opportunity to observe him from afar while, at the same time, proving to his wife that he could behave with decorum and restraint.

And if Randall Piper had the audacity to call him Steve again… well, Neal would be ready this time and he wouldn't hesitate to correct him.

He’d surreptitiously slid into the seat facing the restaurant’s main entrance, giving him a direct sightline to patrons arriving and leaving and he settled in, letting his eyes wander from the menu to the door and back again. 

Peter was practically salivating as he read the many options on offer; he was going to have a hard time settling on one single entrée.

‘This looks great!’ he enthused as he continued to peruse the menu. ‘Do you think it’s over the top if I have a baked potato and a side of beefsteak fries?’

‘Huh?’ Neal muttered, distracted. 

‘What is it you keep looking at?’ Peter asked once the waitress left with their order.

Neal furrowed his brow in question. ‘What do you mean?’

‘You’ve been looking over at the door every few seconds ever since we sat down. You expecting someone else to join us?’ Peter teased.

‘No’ Neal said with a scoff. ‘Of course not.’

The waitress returned with a couple of salads and Neal took advantage of the momentary distraction to look down, avoiding Peter’s probing gaze. 

‘So, what was your take on Robson?’ he asked, expertly changing the subject.

‘He seemed sincere enough. He seems really convinced that Pollock is a fake’ Peter said. ‘I think we should stop in on those three dealers and see what we can find out.’

Neal looked down at his phone where he’d noted the names of the three art dealers Robson claimed to have done business with over the past year. 

‘I think we can safely eliminate Carl Swanson’ Neal said, speaking of the man he’d frequently used as a contact in order to purchase pieces for the Raphael. 

‘Every dealing we’ve had with him seems above board’ Peter said in agreement. ‘But you never know…’

‘Come on, Peter. I’ve known Carl for over ten years. I trust the guy’ Neal said, taking a bite of his salad.

‘Didn't you tell me he was arrested for smuggling some gems in from South America?’

‘Yeah, but that was over twenty years ago and he’s done his time. Five years at Allenwood.’

Peter looked at Neal with a frown; no one was above suspicion.

‘Need I remind you that I did time?’ Neal asked rhetorically. ‘People do go straight, you know. It happens.’

Peter shrugged. ‘I suppose but —’ 

He stopped talking as he noticed Neal’s face growing red as he stared off at something happening right over his left shoulder. Peter turned around to see what was of interest, immediately spotting Sara strolling into the restaurant with a tall, good looking man by her side. Peter watched as the man gently wiped some snow off Sara’s coat sleeve. She slipped out of it and the man hung it up on a coatrack by the door. The two of them followed the hostess who proceeded to walk Sara and Randall Piper right past Neal and Peter’s booth. To Peter’s utter surprise, Neal’s eyes had moved to stare at his salad as if he was expecting it to break out into song or something. 

‘Neal!’ Sara called out as she walked by.

‘Sara!’ Neal said, feigning surprise, his eyes coming up to meet hers. ‘What are you doing here?’

He got to his feet and glanced over Sara’s shoulder at Randall Piper who was standing there, his hand resting gently on Sara’s elbow. 

‘What am I doing here?’ she said, sounding skeptical. ‘I have a meeting, remember?’ she said, pointing to Randall Piper.

‘Brandon!’ Neal exclaimed as he put out his hand. ‘So good to see you again.’

‘It’s Randall’ the man corrected, his nose obviously out of joint. 

‘Of course, of course. Sorry about that. Randall, this is my business partner, Peter Burke.’ 

The two men shook hands as everyone stood around awkwardly, waiting for the moment to pass. The hostess hopped from one foot to the other, menus in hand, eager to seat the party of two so she could return to her post.

‘Well, we’d better get going’ Sara said, studying Neal’s face for any visible tells that this was total bullshit and that she had just been ambushed. 

They were just preparing to walk away when Neal spoke up. ‘I hear the filet mignon is their specialty’ he said to Randall Piper as Sara glared at him.

And just like that they were gone, seated somewhere towards the back of the restaurant where Neal was unable to get a good look at them.

Peter gave him the same bug eyed glare he’d just gotten from his wife as Neal tried desperately to avoid his gaze.

‘NEAL!’ Peter said, his voice stern. ‘Why don't you tell me what the hell is going on?’

TBC


	19. Chapter 19

Frost descended over the Caffrey home - and not just outside their front door. In the hours and days following Sara’s second meeting with Randall Piper, the cold war resumed between herself and Neal. It wasn't all out glacial but still pretty frosty, with communication kept to a minimum and reserved for the exchange of essential information about the kids or things related to their everyday lives. 

After the stunt he’d pulled at Al’s Steak House, Sara was cutting Neal a little slack, considering he hadn't been feeling all that great following his appointment with Dr. Cooper. And, of course, there was that twinge of uneasiness Sara was feeling at just how much she was actually enjoying the lavish attention she was getting from Randall Piper. 

He was a refined, sophisticated man and it didn't hurt that he was stinking rich and oh so easy on the eyes. He was well versed in the arts and knowledgeable about a wide array of topics including fine wine, gourmet food, entertainment and of course, the high tech industry of which he was the undisputed tsar. The conversation between him and Sara flowed easily, often veering away from the business at hand and seamlessly back to their glory days at Brown. It had been an easy, uncomplicated time in Sara’s life, a time when her biggest worry had been how to finagle an extension on the deadline for turning in that essay. Escaping back to those days was a welcome relief from her present day worries, especially since she’d been feeling a little taken for granted lately. 

Nowadays, it seemed she had plenty to fret about: Hope’s precarious health, the issues Neal was having with his meds, Linda’s ever decreasing strength, Caitlin’s outlandish behaviour, Liam’s troubled love life. Being with Randall had proven a respite from all those mundane worries and she was taking full advantage of the situation - while it lasted. 

Sara had not been swayed by Neal’s explanation that he’d been attempting to show restraint by sitting a few feet away from her and her ex without making a fool of himself. In fact, she had not been pleased to see him sitting there, pretending to enjoy a T-bone steak when she knew all too well what he was really doing was spying on her. To his credit, he’d stayed away from their table and had allowed her to conduct business without butting in - even once. When she and Randy had finally left the restaurant by mid-afternoon, Neal and Peter had been long gone and he hadn't brought it up again.

Normally, Neal was the farthest thing from jealous but she conceded there might be some justification for his uneasiness about this awkward situation. Randy had really been turning on the charm and Neal was no fool. But for Sara, it was just a lark; she had hard limits as to what was acceptable behaviour for a married woman and so far, it had all been innocent, harmless flirting. If anything, this newfound attention from such an accomplished man had been a welcome boost to her battered ego as she faced all those irksome signs of advancing years. 

To be sure, she and Neal were still very much in love and closer than ever. But living with someone 24/7 brought out the very best - and the very worst - in anybody, even someone as captivating as Neal Caffrey. Lately, the usually cool, calm, confident man had been slightly off his game. With Linda so sick and all the troubles with Caitlin, he’d been considerably less cool, calm and confident and the one thing that always kept them connected no matter what else was happening - their love life - seemed to be off the rails. 

Neal had been tentative in bed ever since his little misfire on New Year’s Eve morning. After she’d coaxed him into a little romp in the sheets, he’d been more than willing to partake but after a few minutes of foreplay, he’d wilted like a flower after a three week drought. He hadn't made any overtures since then, terrified it might happen again. 

Not that their relationship lived and died in the bedroom but the little mishap seemed to have taken the wind out of his sails and brought out some major insecurities the likes of which Sara had never really been witness to before. Except for those few months following his shooting a few years back, Neal had never struggled in the sack and this current complication seemed to be having an unexpected effect on his confidence, both in and out of the bedroom. 

Unbeknownst to Sara, once she and her client had been shown to their table at the back of the restaurant, Neal had wasted no time switching places with Peter so he could get a better look at what was going on. Peter had chastised him for behaving so immaturely while Neal had blathered on about how Sara had seemed rather taken by the dashing man from her past. In the end, he’d shared his concern that Randall Piper might take advantage of the situation. 

Peter had listened as patiently as he could and by the end of Neal’s little diatribe, he’d pretty well figured out what was really going on: Neal was feeling uncharacteristically vulnerable and it had everything to do with those insecurities in the bedroom. 

Neal had observed from a distance as the two figures huddled across from each other around the small table and his blood pressure had shot up when he’d noticed the waiter bringing over a bottle of Châteauneuf du Pape, his favourite wine. He’d watched in dismay as Sara took a sip and smiled at the waiter - they couldn't even share a bottle of wine anymore, he’d realized, disheartened. 

Peter had done his best to boost Neal’s morale, reassuring him that he and Sara were as solid as any couple he’d ever met but his reassurances had fallen on deaf ears and hadn't been enough to keep Neal from bemoaning the sudden reappearance of Sara’s paramour from her college days.

‘You don’t think Sara would…’ he’d begun before stopping himself.

Peter had frowned. ‘Of course not, Neal. She’s just… he’s an important client. You’ve heard of wining and dining, haven't you? Since when do you go around checking up on your wife, anyway?’

‘Since… since she started hanging out with a good looking multi-millionaire who shares a past with her’ he’d said, sounding like a wounded child.

Peter had poo-pooed the notion. ‘Neal, everybody has a past. Need I remind you of all the women you wined and dined… and conned over the years.’

Neal gave his partner a deathly stare. ‘Do you see any of them sitting here?’ he’d asked, sarcasm dripping from his voice.

‘Oh, oh’ he’d said as Peter turned to see what he was oh-oh-ing about.

‘NO! Don’t turn around! He’s touching her arm’ Neal announced as if he was giving the play by play of a hockey game. ‘Oh, she’s pulling away… oh, wait a minute, she’s smiling at him. Oh, shit!’

‘What?’

‘She’s laughing… oh no, she’s throwing her head back. She’s doing that thing with her hair!’

‘Neal!’ Peter said, his voice growing louder. ‘Do you hear how ridiculous you sound?’

Neal figured he deserved full points for what he’d refrained from doing that day: he had NOT gone chasing through the restaurant after Randall Piper, telling him to keep his grubby little hands to himself, he had NOT followed the man into the bathroom to chew him out, he had NOT called attention to himself by breaking into song in the middle of the restaurant and he had NOT walked up to their table and called his wife ‘darling’. 

Surely, that had to count for something. 

But Sara hadn't seemed inclined to recognize such amazing restraint on her husband’s part and she’d proceeded to give him the brush-off as they prepared to spend a frosty weekend together.

WCWCWC

Peter was looking over the gallery’s inventory, reconciling it with the financial statement when Cameron walked by carrying a large canvas. 

‘You did a really good job on the inventory’ he called out.

Cameron couldn’t help but smile; he’d worked hard on it and he was pleased to know his work had been up to par.

‘I guess you don’t need me around after all, huh?’ Peter added, testing the waters.

‘You’re kidding, right, Mr. B?’ Cam countered as he hurried by. ‘This place wouldn’t be the same without you. Besides, I wouldn't know where to start with the monthly financial statements. It wouldn't be the Raphael without you.’

Peter shrugged self-deprecatingly. ‘Aww, you could learn’ he called out after Cam. ‘You’re a smart guy.’

Cameron disappeared up to the second floor and Peter returned to perusing the documents on his desk. He’d been at it just a few minutes when he heard a voice coming from the back room.

‘Uncle Peter!’ Hope called out as she walked towards him. Peter couldn't help but notice she was looking a little flustered - something new since her accident. 

‘D-d-don’t forget, Marta is going to do my Saturday morning class’ she said as she got closer.

Peter smiled and held up his trusty daybook, where he obsessively wrote everything down. ‘It’s in the vault, Hope’ he reassured her. ‘You just go on your trip and have yourself a great old time with Cam and his family.’ 

He sensed some hesitation from his goddaughter. ‘Or not?’

‘No, no. It’s good’ Hope said, trying to convince herself. ‘I’m excited.’

She’d only visited the Armstrong farm once, very briefly the summer before as she and Cam had driven through upstate New York on their way to Montreal. Neal had sent them on an errand to meet with an artist he was interested in purchasing pieces from and she and Cameron had spent one night in the Armstrong home just outside of Watertown. 

Hope was a big city girl, growing up in the suburbs of perhaps the most vibrant city in the world. Cam, on the contrary, had been raised in the country, on a farm in upstate New York where he and his siblings helped with daily chores and walked the straight and narrow. 

With Cameron’s coaching, she’d done just fine on her maiden voyage to the farm but, this time, they were looking at spending a whole week with the Armstrongs and she couldn't help but feel a little apprehensive.

‘It’s beautiful country up there’ Peter commented, hoping to bring her around. ‘My sister lives in Watertown, you know.’

She nodded vacantly, not really listening. ‘But I take it’s not the scenery you’re worried about.’

Hope chuckled. ’No… it’s just that Cam’s parents are really strict Catholics and…’

‘Is this about sleeping arrangements?’ Peter asked with a frown.

‘No… well, not just that. Mom and Dad have never been very… religious - or particularly strict with us about… you know. The Armstrongs go to church every Sunday, they say grace at every meal and they don’t believe in pre-marital sex… I just don’t want to do anything… you know, untoward.’

Peter smiled. ‘I doubt you could do anything… untoward, Hope’ he said, repeating the word she’d used. ‘Just be your usual sweet self. They’ll love you. Everybody does.’

‘It’s not that. Mr. and Mrs. Armstrong have been wonderful to me but sometimes, I wonder if they think I’ve c-c-corrupted their son… you know, he’s decided to marry a big city girl whose dad owns a gallery in Manhattan. Not exactly simple country folk.’ 

Peter couldn't help thinking this was about something else. ‘Does Cam know? About your dad’s past?’

‘No’ she said, her face growing even more serious. ‘Dad says he wants to tell him before we get married. He says it’s important he know the truth.’

‘And you disagree?’ Peter asked, sensing apprehension.

‘N-n-n-no, not exactly’ Hope stuttered. ‘Cam loves Dad and I can’t imagine finding out he did time back when he was in his twenties is going to change how he feels about him.’

‘But you’re not sure?’ Peter asked.

She shrugged. ‘It never made a lick of difference to Liam and me and I keep telling Dad he doesn't have to tell Cameron if he doesn't want to but he says he’s going to be part of our family now and that family shouldn't have any secrets.’

Peter nodded; Neal had failed to mention his plans to share his past with his son-in-law but knowing his best friend, he could well imagine how this would be weighing on him. For all his swagger, Neal still cared very much what people thought about him - especially the people he cared about.

‘You know, Cameron has a lot of respect for your father. He gave him a job here at the gallery and more importantly, he trusted him with his little girl.’

Hope scoffed. ‘I suppose. I just don’t want anything to go wrong when we visit Cam’s folks.’

‘Why would anything go wrong?’ Peter asked, leaning in and running his hand down Hope’s arm. ‘You’re a smart girl. I’m sure you’ll figure it out.’

‘Figure what out?’ came Cam’s voice.

Hope’s eyes grew and Peter picked up on her hesitation. ‘Oh, we were just discussing these new pieces of Hope’s she wants to bring over and where she wants them displayed.’

‘Oh, are they over at your parents’ place? In your dad’s studio?’ Cam asked. ‘I can swing by and pick them up if you want.’

Hope’s face grew red. ’N-n-no, I’ve still got a few touch-ups to do. We’ll get them after our trip.’

Cam moved closer and pulled his fiancée into his body, her head landing on his chest and her arms around his waist. 

‘I can’t wait to tell my folks’ he said, bringing his lips to rest on the top of her head.

As soon as he’d said the words, he realized he shouldn't have said anything but it was too late. Peter was staring back with a puzzled look on his face although he had a pretty good idea what Cam was talking about.

Hope pulled away and looked at Cameron as the two of them appeared to communicate without words.

‘We’ve settled on a date’ Hope said to her uncle Peter. ‘But you’re sworn to secrecy. You can’t tell Aunt Elizabeth… or Mom and Dad. Especially Mom and Dad.’

Peter made a motion as if buttoning his lips and smiled, waiting. ‘My lips are sealed.’

‘May 22nd. We’re getting married on May 22nd. We’ve got a church and Cam and I have been going to prenuptial classes.’

‘Awww pumpkin, that’s wonderful!’ Peter said as he reached out for her.

She laughed at his use of the nickname she hadn't heard since her childhood and she let herself be manhandled by her godfather who was hugging her tightly. Peter shook Cameron’s hand vigorously as the young man beamed back at him.

‘That’s so great! When are you telling your folks?’ he asked Hope.

‘We’ll call them from Cam’s parents’ place when we break the news to them’ she explained. ‘Now, remember’ she added, zipping her lips.

‘Right, right’ Peter said, eyes aglow. ‘You can count on me.’

WCWCWC

It was late Saturday afternoon when the doorbell rang at the Caffrey house. Neal had been down in his basement studio with Caitlin, shooting the breeze, each of them working on a piece: Neal a painting of his mom and Caitlin a sculpture which had yet to take form.

She seemed to have settled somewhat since that fateful night at Jenna Moore’s place. There was less tension in the air now that Liam was back at school and Neal took advantage of those quiet moments to try to keep the channels of communication open with his foster daughter. The one thing they shared was an abiding love and devotion for Linda Bennett and Neal took full advantage of this shared vulnerability to keep Caitlin talking.

‘How was she this morning?’ he asked.

‘Better than yesterday, I think. She slept most of the time I was there but I was able to get her to eat a little bit of soup before I left.’

Neal pretended to concentrate on mixing paint. ‘She’s lucky to have you in her life.’

Caitlin frowned but didn’t look in his direction, seemingly embarrassed. ‘I don’t know… I think it’s the other way around.’ 

They were both distracted by the sound of the doorbell chiming and Caitlin was first on her feet. 

‘I’ll get it’ she called out as she ran up the stairs.

Neal returned to his canvas, squinting to get a better look; the next thing he knew, there was a loud scream coming from upstairs and he took off after his foster daughter.

WCWCWC

‘You look… I don’t know… energized’ El said as she and Sara sat in the small café.

Sara just smiled back looking like the cat who swallowed the canary. 

‘Come on, ‘fess up’ El said. ‘What did Neal do this time? Did he buy you some expensive piece of jewelry, or was he swinging from the chandelier while you were in bed?’

Sara’s smile faded somewhat. ‘What? No! Actually… it’s work. I’m on the verge of nailing this major account.’

Elizabeth frowned. Work didn't usually put that kind of gleam in her best friend’s eyes.

‘Work?’ she repeated, puzzled. ‘That’s what’s got you looking like you won the lottery?’

Sara looked around to make sure no one was listening. ‘I’m bringing in Randall Piper as a client’ she whispered, giggling like an excited teenager.

‘The Randall Piper, that rich guy who’s always on page six of the New York Post?’

Sara nodded and that sparkle returned in her eyes. ‘Yes! He wants Sterling Bosch to insure his private art collection and his countless other possessions.’

‘Wow! That’s quite a coup. How did you manage to land that account?’

Sara looked away, down at her salad. ‘I’ve… Randy and I knew each other… years ago. He asked for me to handle this personally.’

Elizabeth chuckled. ‘You knew each other? Is that a euphemism for…’

Sara shrugged and looked slightly embarrassed. 

‘You’re kidding!’ El said loudly, giving her best friend’s hand a swat. ‘You never told me you had an affair with Randall Piper.’

‘El! Please! Keep you voice down!’ Sara said, looking around to make sure they hadn't attracted any unwanted attention.

Once she was satisfied the whole restaurant hadn't heard, she turned her attention back to Elizabeth. ‘It was years ago… when I was at Brown’s.’

‘Wow! Talk about the one that got away.’

‘El! Why would you say such a thing?’

‘Sorry’ Elizabeth said with a shrug. ‘I mean the guy’s worth what? Two, three billion dollars?’

‘Five’ Sara corrected with smugness. ‘He’s got three main properties and he wants me to visit each one and evaluate every one of his pieces.’

‘That’s… exciting. How does Neal feel about that?’

‘What do you mean, how does Neal feel about it? It’s work.’

‘Yeah, but every guy gets a little weirded out when his wife starts palling around with one of her exes. Peter went nuts last year when Jason Stitchman came to town and asked me out for coffee.’

‘Jason Stitchman?’ Sara asked, perplexed.

Elizabeth waved her off. ‘Never mind’ she said. ‘Tell me about Randall Piper. Is he as good looking as his pictures?’

Sara giggled like a lovestruck teenager. ‘Better!’ she said with a wide grin. ‘He took me out for lunch last week and he insisted on getting us a couple of tumblers of Domaine d'Amblat Vintage Armagnac after the meal.’

‘Oh my God! That stuff costs over a thousand bucks a bottle’ El enthused. ‘Retail.’

‘I know!’ Sara whispered with a girlish giggle. ‘I was tipsy all afternoon.’

‘So, Neal’s good with this? Did you tell him?’

‘I didn’t have to. He was there. At the restaurant… with Peter’ Sara said, her face growing serious. ‘I swear to God, El, I don’t know what’s gotten into him lately. He’s been so… insecure. His mom’s… well, she’s living on borrowed time and Caitlin’s been a little bugger. And I know he worries about Liam in Syracuse. And then there’s Hope, she’s having that last surgery next month.’

El leaned in to listen. ‘And… well, he’s having trouble adjusting to his new medication. It’s affecting his… you know’ Sara said, with an exaggerated eyebrow raise.

‘Neal? Neal’s having trouble in the bedroom’ El declared.

Sara looked around again and gave her friend a dirty look. ‘Why don’t you say that a little louder. I don’t think that guy over there heard you.’

‘Sorry’ El replied with a frown. ‘But Neal… you always said he…’

‘Well, he’s not quite himself lately and Dr. Cooper says he might need some help… eventually.’

‘That’s no big deal. Peter’s been getting… ‘help’ for a few years now’ she said, using air quotes.

Sara leaned in, whispering. ‘That’s what I told him. But you know Neal. He has to be the best at everything and I can see this thing with Randy is really getting to him.’

‘Randy? Seriously?’

‘What? That’s what I call him’ Sara said, eyes narrowing.

‘Well, don’t go flaunting it. You know how weird Neal can get. Remember how protective he was when you were pregnant with Liam. He almost got arrested for stalking you. And what about when that psycho came back into your life?’

Sara thought back to Craig Williamson, the ex-beau who had insinuated himself into her life, obsessed with reconnecting with her. Neal had ended up on the wrong side of a knife’s blade that time and she’d almost suffered the same fate.

‘Well, his instincts were right that time but this thing with Randy… it’s just harmless flirting, something Neal knows plenty about.’

Elizabeth nodded; that was true. Neal was the ultimate flirt - with both men and women.

‘Well, just remember even Neal can be vulnerable’ she reminded Sara.

‘I suppose’ Sara said, putting down her fork by her salad bowl and looking at her best friend.

‘I know it’s not going anywhere’ she began in full confession mode. ‘And I wouldn't want it to but it’s nice to have someone look at you that way, you know, someone who’s not your husband.

‘I get it’ Elizabeth said with a sympathetic nod. ‘Just don’t go doing anything stupid.’

It seemed like an unnecessary warning but perhaps Sara would have done better to heed her best friend’s words of wisdom a little more closely.

WCWCWC 

Neal ran up the stairs in a tizzy, practically tripping over his own two feet. What he found when he finally turned the corner was Caitlin, her arms around the neck of a man who was standing by the open front door.

She was still squealing.

‘Is everything okay?’ Neal asked, breathlessly.

Caitlin pulled away, revealing a man of about thirty years of age, bearded, wearing a woolen cap on his head and a well-worn winter coat.

‘Mr. C, this is my brother Jesse’ she cried out, a smile as wide as Neal had ever seen on her face.

‘Your brother!’ he exclaimed, surprised.

He’d heard very little about the man - only what Caitlin had revealed in dribs and drabs over the years.

‘Come in, come in’ Neal said as he walked over to close the front door in order to keep the warm air from escaping out into the cold winter afternoon. 

‘What are you doing here Jess?’ Caitlin asked, smile still firmly on her face.

‘I told you I’d come up for a visit’ the man said. ‘I thought I’d surprise you so I hitched a ride up. You didn't tell me how fucking cold it is up here, though.’

He stopped and looked over at Neal, noticing a bit of a frown in response to his use of profanity. 

‘Sorry’ he muttered.

He grabbed Caitlin once more and lifted her up off the ground, twirling her around as she began squealing again. Neal had rarely seen her so happy in all the years he'd known her.

‘Take off your coat, come on in from the cold’ he told the younger man. 

‘I can’t believe you’re really here’ Caitlin was saying as Jesse slipped out of his coat and handed it to Neal.

Caitlin was already dragging the young man towards the back of the house, hopping up and down as she went, looking more like an excited toddler than a serious young woman.

‘Are you hungry? Thirsty?’ she was asking as she pulled him along. 

‘How about a cup of coffee?’ Neal added, following close behind.

‘Do you have anything stronger?’ Jesse asked.

Neal coughed to cover his unease and headed to the fridge. He was pretty sure they still had beer left from the New Year’s Eve party.

‘How about a beer?’ he said, holding one up.

‘Great!’ the man said, taking a seat at the kitchen table.

‘You look great, munchkin’ he said, looking Caitlin up and down. ‘You’ve grown since I last saw you.’

‘Duh. I was thirteen the last time you saw me’ she replied with a chuckle.

‘Naw, hasn't been that long, has it?’ he said, taking a long pull on his beer.

Neal looked the man up and down, trying to size him up. Physically, except for the blue eyes, he didn't look much like Caitlin at all. His hair, darker than hers, was disheveled perhaps because he’d just taken off his hat, and he was sporting a three day growth on his chin and cheeks. He wore a pair of jeans that looked about two sizes too large and a plaid shirt that had a few tiny holes in it, perhaps from moths munching at it, Neal reflected. It definitely looked like the man had fallen on hard times. But what struck Neal most of all was the look of mischief in his eyes; he knew that look all too well. Was it the look of a con scoping out his mark or was it just a young man, happy to be reuniting with his long lost step-sister?

‘So, what brings you to New York?’ he finally asked as he took the seat across from him.

Jesse ran his hand down Caitlin’s arm and smiled. ‘Why, this little one, of course. I’ve been promising to visit her for a while and I thought I’d stop talking about it and get off my ass.’

Neal nodded. 

‘So, where are you staying?’ Caitlin asked, her hand in his.

‘Hum… nowhere, really. I was going to see if I could maybe get a room at the local YMCA.’

Caitlin looked over at Neal and without a word, he knew what she was asking. Caitlin was family and by extension, so was her brother. He couldn’t very well not offer the young man some hospitality.

‘Are you staying long?’ he settled on asking before committing to offering him a place to stay.

Normally, this would be something he’d run by Sara but Caitlin kept looking at him with those puppy dog eyes and after a few seconds, Neal folded.

‘You’re welcome to stay with us… until you can find a proper place to stay’ he offered, almost immediately regretting what he’d said.

‘Yes! Stay here with us!’ Caitlin said, practically jumping up and down.

‘Wow, that’s awfully generous of you’ the man said. ‘I may stick around a while, see if I can get some work in these parts. Somebody must be willing to give a good ole boy a chance to make a few bucks.’

Neal nodded and sighed. 

It was official; Sara was going to kill him.

TBC


	20. Chapter 20

‘You did WHAT?’

‘Sssh! Quiet! He’ll hear you’ Neal whispered as he closed their bedroom door.

‘I don’t care if he hears us, Neal. What in heavens’ name were you thinking?’ Sara asked rhetorically, her voice growing shrill.

Neal perched himself on the edge of their bed, hoping to bring down the tone. ‘Honey, you’ve said it yourself, Caitlin is part of the family and by extension… so is her brother’ he whispered. ‘We can’t leave him out on the street.’

‘Neal, we don’t know a thing about this man. He could be a serial killer for all we know!’

Neal thought of his own radar going off as he'd looked into the young man’s eyes earlier. He just as promptly pushed the thought away. 

‘He’s not a serial killer, Sara’ he said with as much assurance as he could muster.

She joined Neal, sitting next to him on the bed. ‘Still, how could you invite him to stay without even talking to me about it first?’

There were a few answers to that question including the fact that he knew all too well this was exactly how she would have reacted to the request. But he went with the one answer that might sway her.

‘Honey, it just happened so fast. You should have seen Caitlin’s face. She was so excited to see him and she practically begged me to offer him a place to stay. It’s just for a few days…’

‘Did you tell him that?’ she asked, her tone accusing.

‘Not… not exactly’ he admitted meekly.

‘But we can firm that up with him right now if you want’ he added, springing to his feet.

‘We?’

‘I. I can firm that up with him’ he said, touching her arm gently and hoping his gesture would help cool things off. 

To her credit, Sara didn't pull away, she just looked up at her husband with a frown. 

‘Two nights. No more’ she declared as he nodded in agreement.

‘Right. Two nights’ he repeated for emphasis.

He looked down at her, sitting there on their old lumpy mattress, and conjured up a smile.

‘So, are we still doing this… mattress thing?’ he asked, feigning enthusiasm. He looked down at his watch. ‘I promised we’d do it this weekend and the stores are open for another few hours.’

Sara looked at him warily.

‘Afterwards, I thought I’d take you out to dinner’ he added enthusiastically. ‘To Pavone’s.’

‘Pavone’s?’ she said, her voice lilting. He thought he saw an actual smile creep onto her face. ‘All right. I suppose we could do that.’

Neal kept smiling broadly, hoping to elicit the same from his wife but all he got was an eye roll; apparently, she wasn’t falling for his irresistible charm.

‘Just let me change and I’ll be down in a minute’ she said, standing.

‘Anything I can help you with?’ Neal asked as he let his voice drop an octave. What had been intended as playful banter came out sounding kind of creepy and he shook his head. ‘Never mind, I’ll be downstairs.’

The house was awfully quiet, he noticed, as he came down the stairs to the main floor. No voices off in the distance, not even the sound of Raffie snoring nearby. When he made it all the way to the kitchen, Neal found the place empty, except for a note on the table.

‘Jesse and I took Raffie out for a walk’ the note read.

It appeared Neal would have to put off telling the wayward stranger he was on the clock. His eyes moved to sweep the room and landed on the young man’s duffel bag which had been thrown by the couch in the family room. With a quick glance around the place to make sure no one was around, Neal made his way over to take a closer look. He’d stuck his nose in where it didn't belong on countless occasions in his life - and besides, this was for a good cause. Sara was right. They didn't know a thing about this guy and he’d definitely been giving off that grifter vibe Neal knew all too well. 

After the briefest of hesitations, Neal marched himself over to the family room and grabbed the bag, setting it down on the couch. He proceeded to tear it open and peek inside.

Sitting on top was a toiletries bag and Neal brushed it aside momentarily, searching through several articles of clothing: socks, underwear, a couple of shirts - all plaid - two wool sweaters, a pair of sweatpants and a second pair of jeans. He felt something smooth and hard and pulled out a half empty twenty-six ouncer of cheap whisky. He studied the bottle and unscrewed it, taking a whiff. It smelled horrible yet a couple of years ago at the height of his struggle, he wouldn't have hesitated to take a long soothing slug of the amber liquid. 

He continued his search; it seemed bad scotch wasn't the man’s only vice Neal discovered as he spotted two packs of cigarettes. He glanced inside the one that was open and sniffed - apparently, the guy like the occasional joint with his whisky.

He set the cigarettes and the bottle aside and continued poking around, finding a stack of documents - all printouts from internet sites. He frowned as he looked at the first one, the web page for the Raphael followed by the one for the June Ellington School of Art. Whatever this young man was up to, he’d obviously taken the time to do a little research about Neal and what he did for a living. More alarming, perhaps, were the following sheets of paper in the short stack which included a writeup about Sterling Bosch and Sara’s bio, complete with a photograph of her smiling back at the camera, smartly dressed in a bright coral dress - Sara had always hated that picture.

Was this guy looking to scam them? Why would he have gone through the trouble of staking them out? It wasn't as if they were independently wealthy. Was he planning to pull some con, ask them for money? 

Neal returned his attention to the toiletries bag. Jesse didn't strike him as the kind of guy who was big on fancy schmancy grooming products. He found deodorant, a small shaving kit - which apparently the guy didn't use on a regular basis - and some cheap cologne as well as a shrinking bar of soap wrapped in saran wrap. In the bottom of the small bag, he found a couple of prescription pill bottles both with the name Bill Hilson printed on the outside. He studied the label - one was marked Synthroid and came from a pharmacy in Houston, Texas. Neal knew that medication, Sara had been taking it for years to help regulate her thyroid. He also knew what the pills looked like: they were tiny little tablets with the word Synthroid inscribed on the outer edge. 

What he found inside the pill bottle was definitely not Synthroid but an assortment of pills he immediately recognized as Demerol and Oxycontin. He poured the contents onto his hand, examining a dozen or so olive-green tablets; definitely Rohypnol, a date rape drug he’d had a nasty run in with a few years back. The second bottle which was marked as Metformin held a similar assortment of narcotics, three dozen or so of the same type of pills, one in particular he didn't recognize. He capped the bottles and returned them to the bottom of the bag as he continued digging to see what else he could find. 

As worrisome as all that was, it paled in comparison to what Neal discovered next as he continued to poke around the contents of the duffel bag. He pushed past some underwear and a dog eared mystery novel by Linwood Barclay. There, at the very bottom, Neal’s hand bumped into something hard and unyielding. His eyes grew in surprise as he pulled out the heavy object and brought it to eye level to examine it. 

Why, oh why was Caitlin’s brother carrying around a loaded gun?

WCWCWC

‘I’ve missed you so much Jess’ Caitlin said as she sat next to her brother on the snowy park bench. She laced her arm in his and looked up adoringly.

It was a beautiful sunny winter day, quite pleasant in fact if you were wearing the proper seasonal attire. Caitlin had rooted through the basket of scarves and mittens at the front door and had found a soft woolen scarf of Liam’s and some warm gloves for her brother to wear. They’d made their way a few blocks over to the dog park and were sitting side by side while Raffie frolicked with his doggie friends nearby. 

‘I missed you too, squirt’ the man said, touching the tip of her nose. ‘You look good… happy.’

Caitlin looked away and sighed, returning her gaze to the young man. ‘Living with the Caffreys has been wonderful. They’ve done so much for me.’ 

‘So, how many of these little Caffreys are running around, exactly?’

‘Well, there’s Hope. She’s Mr. C and Sara’s daughter. She works at the gallery with her fiancé Cameron. She lives at home but spends most of the time at Cam’s place. And then there’s Liam. He’s… eighteen, nineteen soon. He goes to school in Syracuse but he comes home whenever he can. Then there’s Mr. C’s best friend, Mr. Burke and his wife Elizabeth. He helps with the gallery now that Mr. C spends most of his time at the school.’

‘Why do you call him Mr. C and you call his wife by her first name?’ the man asked as he pulled out a cigarette and offered one to Caitlin. 

She shook her head. ‘It’s complicated’ she replied, reflecting on her early days with the Caffreys and how it had been important to create some distance between herself and Neal in order to give him the deference he deserved after she’d been so disrespectful to him. 

‘Well, he seems to have done pretty well for himself. He owns a gallery, huh? And an art school?’

‘Yeah, he works hard and he invests almost everything he makes back into the school. That’s where we met, you know.’

Jesse shivered and leaned forward to listen.

‘Mr. C has been… let’s just say he’s given me a lot of chances. I haven’t exactly been an angel, if you know what I mean.’

‘Who is?’ Jesse countered with a chuckle.

She frowned. ‘Yeah, but the Caffreys are good people. They don’t deserve some of the shit I’ve put them through. You know, I actually stole a couple of pair of earrings from Sara the first time I visited their house and then I… I accused Mr C of molesting me.’

She let her eyes drop in shame.

‘What? The guy sexually abused you?’

‘No! Of course, not’ she hastened to say. ‘I made it up, Jess. I could have ruined his life with my lies. And even after all that, he and Sara invited me to come and live with them.’

She looked at her brother. ‘I don’t know where I’d be if they hadn't taken me in. I was about to be shipped upstate to some boot camp group home.’

‘Well, some people have a lot more opportunities than you and I have’ he said, his voice bitter. ‘Don’t give them so much credit.’

‘How can you say that?’ Caitlin exclaimed. ‘You don’t even know these people, Jess.’ 

‘Hey, calm down sis. I’m just saying that’s it’s easy to help others when you have everything you need.’

Caitlin was distracted by Raffie who was sniffing some smaller dog’s butt - to the dismay of the puppy’s owner.

‘Raffie! Raffie! Come here boy!’ she called out as the pooch came trotting back obediently.

‘Fuck, it’s cold out here’ Jesse said, getting to his feet. ‘Let’s go, I’m starved.’  
WCWCWC

Away games were a heck of a lot of fun but they were also very tiring. There was the camaraderie on the bus, the teasing, the laughter, the off colour jokes guys shared when there were no girls around. There was the excitement of stepping onto the basketball court in a different city each time, the anticipation, the cheering crowds. 

But there was also the noisy hotel rooms and inevitable lack of sleep and all the extra work that awaited the players when they finally made their way back to campus. Liam knew that he’d have to play catchup and do a lot of reading if he wanted to stay on top of things. After all, he was there to get a business degree and he didn't want to lose sight of that, even for a moment. 

He threw a few things into an overnight bag and glanced over at Josh Monteith who was doing the same.

‘You think you can tear yourself away from lover boy for a couple of nights?’ Josh asked with a smirk.

Liam gave him a deathly stare. ‘It’ll do me good’ he said. ‘I can think a lot more clearly when he’s not in my face.’

‘It’s not your face I’m worried about’ Josh said with a naughty grin. He scoffed, realizing Liam wasn't enjoying the ribbing. 

‘Look, I’m sorry. I know you’re really struggling with this. You just gotta figure it out and come up with a plan’ he said. ‘And then you have to stick to it.’

Liam looked over at his buddy with a raised eyebrow. It was all easier said than done. ‘I know, I know. I’m going to do it when we get back. I’m going to sit him down and tell him it’s not working out.’

‘Good luck with that’ Josh said, over his shoulder. ‘That guy is more persistent than… I don't know anybody as persistent as he is. And he’s obviously got it bad for you.’

Liam scoffed again.

‘What? You know you’re hot, Caffrey. You got guys and girls drooling all over you. Man, if I swung that way, I’d be taking a poke at you too.’

‘Shut up!’ Liam said with a chuckle as he threw a pair of underwear at his roommate, hitting him in the head and watching the tighty-whities tumble onto the bed.

Josh picked them up off the bed and brought them to his nose, sniffing and sighing as he grinned. ‘I’m keeping these, Caffrey… and I’m sleeping with them under my pillow tonight.’

Liam was just about to come back with some other snarky retort when the door flew open and there stood Todd Greenway, looking hot and bothered. He was wearing a pair of black skintight bicycle shorts, despite the cold winter day and a black and white tank top that showed off his pecs rather nicely. On his feet, were his signature slip-ons and his hair stood on end as it always did, the pink highlights on full display.

‘Thank God’ the man said as he brushed past Josh and over to Liam. ‘I thought you’d left already.’

Liam gave him a wary look and sighed. ‘Todd, we said goodbye last night’ he reminded him, attempting to return to packing.

Todd’s hands were already on him, insistently prying him away from the task. He threw his arms around Liam and hugged him tightly. 

‘Todd! Seriously!’ Liam said. ‘You’re suffocating me!’

‘Oh yeah?’ the other man said, his voice dropping. ‘You weren't complaining about being suffocated last night when I was —’

Josh coughed and Liam looked over at him, rolling his eyes.

‘Come on’ Liam said, taking Todd’s arm and leading him towards the door. They stepped out of the room and Liam leaned in to speak into the other man’s ear; there were people all over the place and he sure as hell didn't want to air his private affairs in front of the whole student body.

‘Todd, I’ll be back in two days and we can… talk then, all right’ he said, holding himself back from planting a huge wet kiss on the man’s gorgeous plump lips.

Todd looked up and down the busy hallway and turned back to look at his boyfriend. He nodded in agreement but unlike Liam, he had no self control and he leaned in, placing a big juicy kiss on the other man’s mouth.  
WCWCWC

‘Oh, I like this’ Sara swooned as she crossed her ankles and lay on her back. 

Neal followed suit, joining her, his winter coat bunched up uncomfortably underneath him. He tugged at it impatiently and tried to get comfortable - as comfortable as one could get while lying fully dressed on a bed in the middle of a busy mattress store. 

He sighed and smiled at his wife; he was doing his penance and Sara seemed pleased to finally have him on board. So far, he’d been a good sport, making up for his recent shortcomings by remaining upbeat throughout the never ending ordeal but, despite his best intentions, he was drawing close to his limit. They'd been at it for three hours and he was pretty well at the end of his tether.

‘Yeah, it’s just as comfortable as the other thirty-seven beds we’ve tried’ he mumbled under his breath.

Sara tsked and he turned his head to look at her, flashing her an insincere smile. ‘I think this is the one, honey’ he said without much conviction. The fact that he’d said the exact same thing at least a dozen times in the last hour didn't help.

‘I don’t know, it’s a little… too firm, don't you think?’ Sara said, pushing down on the bed with her fingertips.

‘It’s from our orthopaedic line’ the salesman said, weighing in. ‘One of our top sellers.’

‘You hear that, honey’ Neal said with a forced smile. ‘One of their top sellers.’

‘I don’t know…’ Sara said, just as she’d said the other thirty-seven times. 

‘You know, I think I liked the one at the other place more’ she said. ‘It was firm but… not too firm.’ 

Neal stared back, incredulous. ‘Which one, babe?’ he asked, doing his best not to show that he was about to lose patience. 

They’d already visited four different mattress places and the stores would be closing soon; he really didn't want to have to do this all over again in the morning. At this point, he’d have agreed to buy an inflatable mattress in the form of pink flamingo if it brought an end to his misery. 

‘Why don’t you think about it?’ the balding man said as he handed Sara a brochure. She tucked it into her oversized purse to join the others she’d been collecting all afternoon.

‘I don’t think we need to —’ Neal began. He was ready to sign on the dotted line. Now!

‘Let’s not be impulsive’ Sara said, giving him a sideways glance. ‘Thanks for your help’ she added as she nodded to the salesman.

‘Babe, I don’t know how many more beds we need to try’ Neal moaned as he dragged himself to his feet. He looked like a kid forced to go clothes shopping when all he wanted was to stay home and play video games.

Sara gave him a stern look. ‘You said… you wouldn’t complain, remember.’

He nodded and glanced at his watch. ‘Dammit honey, the stores are closing in five minutes’ he commented with a smile. ‘You hungry?’

‘Fine!’ Sara replied with a loud sigh. ‘We’ll eat. But this isn't over yet, Caffrey.’

WCWCWC

Pavone’s was one of Sara’s favourite restaurants and as luck would have it, it was located right in White Plains, not more than three miles from their home. She didn't often indulge in carbs but they’d done an awful lot of walking and by the time they settled in a booth, she’d slipped off her shoes under the table and was grabbing for a piece of fine Italian bread, smothering it with butter and stuffing it into her mouth.

‘My, my, you are hungry’ Neal commented as he glanced at the menu.

‘I only had a salad for lunch’ she replied, her mouth full. 

Neal smiled. He loved seeing her like this, carefree, unguarded. It was a side of her she didn't share with just anybody; Randall Piper had probably never seen this side of her. 

‘So, am I forgiven? For everything?’ he asked, batting his eyelashes at her innocently.

She frowned and looked him up and down. ‘You’re getting there’ she admitted.

Neal’s smile broadened. ‘Good’ he said as he reached for her hand.

‘So you’re going to talk to… what’s his name, Jesse?’ she said, hesitating. 

‘The minute we get home’ Neal promised, squeezing her hand. 

He wondered if he should come clean about what he'd found in the man’s duffel bag. It was bound to put her knickers in a knot but then again, if she found out later and he hadn't told her…

‘Honey, I need to talk to you about something but you have to promise to stay calm.’

Sara’s eyes grew and she pulled her hand away. ‘What?!’ she barked, worried.

‘Promise me’ he attempted again.

‘I promise’ she replied, although it was hard to make such an assertion when you didn't know what the hell you were agreeing to.

‘What did you do?’ she asked when he hesitated.

Neal’s face darkened. ‘Why are you assuming I did anything?’ he asked, annoyed.

She just stared back at him. She pretty well had a list as long as her arm of Neal’s misdeeds - and that was only in the past week or so. 

‘Okay, fine’ he said, ‘I’ll admit I’ve been a little… off, lately.’

‘Off? Is that what you’re calling your behaviour?’ she countered sarcastically.

The conversation appeared to be deteriorating and if Neal was going to tell her what he knew damn well he needed to tell her, he had to try to keep her centred. 

‘Fine, I’m sorry, okay. I don’t know how many times I have to say it. I’ve been… this thing with Piper it’s… well, it’s thrown me for a loop and after what Dr. Cooper said the other day…’ he began.

Sara looked over at her husband’s forlorn face and this time, she was the one who reached out for him, taking his hand in hers and squeezing it.

‘I know, Neal, I know. I’m sorry too. I know there’s a lot going on right now but going behind my back and following me around to meetings with my clients isn't going to make things any better.’

Neal nodded; she’d made a fair point. 

‘And this other thing… you know’ Sara continued as she gave a head nod towards his belt buckle. ‘Try not to worry so much about it, okay? We’ll work through it, I’ll help you.’

Neal could feel his face reddening as his mind wandered momentarily to his lapses in the boudoir. They hadn't had sex in weeks - at least not successfully - and he couldn't imagine trying again and failing…. again. Just the thought of it was enough to make him shrivel up into a little ball. 

Sara tugged at his hand, trying to get his attention. ‘So what is it? What is it you wanted to tell me?’

‘This Jesse guy’ Neal began, taking a deep breath. ‘I… after we talked, I went down and I… I searched his bag.’

Sara leaned forward, ears perked; she’d done her fair share of poking around people’s personal belongings in her line of work and she knew Neal had no compunction about snooping, if the circumstances required.

‘What… what did you find?’

‘Besides some really cheap cologne?’ he asked, buying time.

Sara scoffed and waited for him to continue. ‘He’s carrying a gun, Sara.’

She stared back blankly. The gun debate was a very old one for the couple. She flashed back to the major fight they’d had after Hope was born, how she’d wanted to keep her gun in the house and how Neal had freaked out about it. They’d always been on differing sides of the gun issue but after Neal had finally come clean about the reasons for his aversion to firearms, she’d relented and she’d been keeping her piece locked up in a safe at Sterling Bosch ever since.

‘A gun?’

‘Yeah’ he whispered, looking around to make sure they weren't being overheard. ‘And… he had some stuff printed out from the internet, about the gallery and the school.’

Sara listened, her eyes narrowing. ‘He also had some stuff about Sterling Bosch and he'd printed out your bio page’ he added.

‘What? Why?’

Neal shrugged. ‘I don’t have a clue. But I’m going to find out. The last thing Caitlin needs right now is another bad influence in her life.’

Sara thought back to the way Caitlin had looked at the man, with stars in her eyes. She was going to be so disappointed if they found out he was up to no good.

‘And there’s more’ Neal said as Sara stared back, dumbfounded. ‘He’s got a bunch of pills.’

‘Pills? What kind of pills?’

‘Narcotics: oxycontin, demerol. He even had some rohypnol.’

‘Rohypnol? Isn’t that what —’

‘Yeah’ he replied with a nod, thinking back to how Matthew Keller had gotten Neal’s ex-girlfriend to drug him in an attempt to break up his marriage. 

‘Look, I’ll have a chat with him as soon as we get back, lay down some ground rules, tell him he can stay for a couple of days and I’ll try to get to the bottom of it’ he said, his voice strong.

This was the Neal she’d fallen in love with, the man who stopped at nothing to maker sure those he loved were safe. She felt a surge of affection for him and she swallowed down her emotion. Maybe she’d been insensitive to what he’d been going through. In the current circumstances, she couldn't begrudge him a little appearance by the green-eyed monster. Truth was, she wouldn't be all that thrilled if a woman from Neal’s past started coming around, sniffing.

‘Neal’ she said, her voice soft. 

He looked up, still focussed on the problem at hand. ‘What?’

‘I love you, you know.’

TBC


	21. Chapter 21

‘Let me see it’ Sara whispered.

Neal pulled out the pistol and lay it on the bedspread between them. 

‘Pretty basic’ she commented, turning it over in her hands.

Neal glared at her. ‘A gun is a gun, Sara’ he said, taking it back from her.

They heard Caitlin’s bedroom door closing in the distance. That’s what Neal had been waiting for; no sense upsetting her by confronting Jesse while she was within earshot. 

‘That’s my cue’ Neal said, getting to his feet.

Sara stood and placed a hand on his arm. ‘Be firm’ she urged him. ‘Remember, two days.’

He stepped out of their bedroom and glanced over his shoulder, making sure Caitlin’s bedroom door was closed and he headed downstairs to have the confrontation he’d been dreading. This guy was up to no good and the last thing Neal needed was more grief. Hell, neither did Caitlin. She’d been through so much heartache and disappointment in her young life and he didn't want her having to face any more hardship. He had to find a way to get this loser out of the house without totally destroying his foster daughter’s illusions about her big brother.

Jesse was poking around in his duffel bag when Neal appeared in the family room. The hide-a-bed was already open and he could see some of the clothes he’d found earlier thrown on top of the bedsheets as the man dug to the very bottom of his bag, seemingly on the search for something.

‘Got everything you need?’ Neal asked, interrupting him.

Jesse kept poking around in his bag. ‘Yeah, yeah, thanks’ he mumbled without looking up.

‘Caitlin seems thrilled to have you here’ Neal commented, trying to engage the young man in conversation.

The man grumbled, facing away.

Neal reached around and pulled the weapon out of the back of his jeans where he’d tucked it in.

‘It this what you’re looking for?’ he asked.

That seemed to get Jesse’s attention and he turned around to find Neal standing there, holding the very item he’d been frantically searching for.

‘You searched my bag?’ he said, his tone indignant.

‘You brought a loaded gun into our house’ Neal countered with just as much indignation. 

‘So?’ the young man said, cocky.

‘So?’ Neal replied, his voice growing louder. ‘We have young children visiting this house on a regular basis. And maybe I just don’t want a gun in my house. That is my prerogative.’

Jesse took a few steps forward and grabbed the gun from Neal’s outstretched hand.

‘And it’s now an unloaded gun’ Neal said, matter-of-factly.

The other man frowned at him and stared back. 

‘You’ll get the ammo when you leave’ Neal continued.

Jesse turned and threw the gun onto the top of his bag.

‘Why are you really here, Jesse?’ Neal asked.

The other man looked up and gave Neal a crooked smile, a poor attempt at charming him - if only he knew who he was dealing with. ‘I told you, I’m visiting my baby sister.’

‘Oh, the one you haven't bothered to visit in almost seven years?’ 

‘Look, my relationship with my sister is none of your business’ Jesse argued.

‘That’s where you’re wrong. Caitlin is my business. She’s part of my family’ Neal said, his voice strong. ‘And I look out for my family. Whatever you’ve come here to do, you’re not doing it on my watch.’

Jesse rolled his eyes. ‘What is she to you, anyway? The flavour of the week? Your good deed for the year?’ 

‘You don’t know a thing about me’ Neal replied, his tone terse. ‘Or your sister, for that matter.’

‘So… what? Are you kicking me out?’ Jesse asked, hands placed provocatively on his hips.

‘Whatever you might think, we love Caitlin and we want her to be happy’ Neal began. ‘And for some reason, she seems thrilled to have you here - so I’m willing to cut you a little slack. But she’s had more than enough disappointment in her life and I won’t have you sweeping into town and leaving a mess behind for us to clean up.’

The man continued to stare Neal down. He scoffed.

‘So this is how it’s going down’ Neal continued. ‘I won’t tell Caitlin about what I found in your bag or our little talk and you can have two days to make nice and pretend to have a lovely visit. Then, I want you to make up some excuse and get the hell out of my house and I want you to crawl back into whatever hole you came out of and go back to calling her once a year and pretending to be a good brother.’ 

Jesse scoffed. ‘Or what?’

‘Or I tell your sister what you’re really up to. That all you want is somewhere to crash while you try to unload that contraband stuff I found in your bag.’

Jesse shook his head. ‘She’s not going to believe you’ he taunted.

‘Oh no? Don’t push me Jesse. You have no idea what I’m capable of when it comes to my family. And make no mistake about it, Caitlin is family.’

The man just stood there, staring Neal down, waiting to see who would be the first to blink.

‘You rich artsy types are all the same. Looking for some good deed to do so you can alleviate your guilty conscience about ripping people off.’

‘You don't know the first thing about my life or the work I do’ Neal said, his gaze steady.

‘I know your type’ Jesse said. ‘You’ve never gotten your hands dirty, you’ve always lived a charmed life. You have no idea what it’s like to sleep on the street or in the drunk tank. Bet you’ve only ever slept on silk sheets.’

Neal thought of the irony of what the man was saying; he’d spent almost four years in a federal penitentiary where each day you took your life in your hands, waiting for some hardened criminal to make you his jail wife or, worse yet, decide he didn't like the look of your face and proceed to rearrange it.

He let his body relax and pointed to the hide-a-bed. ‘I expect you to keep this area clean and tidy while you’re staying here and to make that bed in the morning. Breakfast is at seven.’ 

‘Whatever…’ Jesse said arrogantly.

‘And if you do anything to hurt Caitlin, I will hunt you down and make your life a living hell’ Neal added for good measure.

He gave the man a twisted smile. ‘Good night’ he said before turning away. 

He was halfway up the stairs before he realized just how badly his hands were shaking.

WCWCWC

‘Hi honey’ Sara said into the phone just as Neal was coming through their bedroom door.

‘Liam’ she mouthed. 

Neal sat down on the edge of the bed next to his wife who’d already slipped under the covers.

‘Yeah, he watched some of it on the laptop’ she said as Neal motioned for her to hand over the phone. 

She waved his hand away. ‘So, how are you settling in? How are classes? Is everything all right?’

Neal watched her nodding and sighed loudly, waiting for his turn to talk to his son. She asked him a few more probing questions - à la Sara Ellis - before she finally took the hint and prepared to hand the phone over to Neal. 

‘Okay, okay. Your dad’s going to rip the phone out of my hand if I don't let him talk to you’ she said with a chuckle.

‘Hey buddy!’ Neal chirped once it was finally his turn. ‘Great game tonight! Are you on your way back already?’

‘Yeah, we just left. We’ll be back by morning’ Liam replied sounding exhausted.

Neal could hear hootin’ and hollerin’ in the background as a bus full of hormone fuelled young men traveled down the highway somewhere in North Carolina on their way back to Syracuse. 

‘Are you going to be able to get some shuteye?’

‘I’ll try’ Liam shouted so the guys around him could hear. ‘If I can get these guys to shut the hell up.’

Neal heard some taunting on the other end as a few of the guys reacted to Liam’s comment.

‘I’ve got a class after lunch tomorrow I’d rather not miss’ he continued, undaunted.

‘I thought the coaches took all your phones away when you were on the road’ Neal commented.

‘They do. But we get them back right after the game’ Liam replied. ‘Mom says you watched some of it?’

‘I did. That was an amazing three pointer you got there at the end of the first quarter’ Neal said with pride.

‘Yeah, I had good cover so I thought I’d go for it’ Liam said with his usual modesty. 

‘Wake Forest sure gave you a run for your money’ Neal commented, launching into their usual after the game analysis.

‘They’ve got a really strong defence this year’ Liam said, over the loud voices in the background. ‘They’ve got that rookie, Richie Alberts.’

‘Yeah’ Neal said. ‘He’s a big guy. He's gotta be, what, six eight, six nine?’

‘Six ten’ Liam corrected. ‘And built like a brick pizzeria.’

Neal laughed at the analogy. He loved having these debriefs after each one of Liam’s game. He missed the days when he could attend every single game and sit in the car with him on the way home, dissecting the game, play by play. Unfortunately, it was neither feasible nor practical to quit his job and follow his son, the basketball star, around the country although Neal would have gladly done it if he didn't have to work for a living.

‘So, how are things going with Todd?’ Neal asked, a question that had been on his mind since he’d dropped his son off the previous weekend.

Sara leaned in and motioned for him to put the call on hands free so she could hear. He obliged.

‘Aww you know, we’re still hanging in there…’ Liam said. ‘…for now.’

‘I bumped into Cody at ShopRite last week’ Sara said as Neal scowled at her.

She shrugged as if to say ‘What? So sue me’

Liam didn't say a word. 

‘Honey?’

‘Yeah, I heard you Mom. How was he?’

‘Good. He asked about you.’

‘Oh yeah?’ Liam said with a tinge of sadness. ‘Well, say hi for me if you see him again.’

Neal and Sara grimaced as they tried to hear him over the loud voices on the bus - all the louder, it seemed, after a winning game.

‘Hey Caffrey!’ they heard someone call out, teasing him. ‘Are you talking to your mommy?’

Liam scoffed. ‘I gotta go’ he said with a chuckle. ‘I’ll call you next week. Love you guys.’

‘We love you too, honey’ Sara called out before the call went dead.

‘You saw Cody at ShopWrite?’ Neal said, mimicking her tone of voice. 

He took the phone, returning it to its rightful place on the bedside table.

‘What? I did!’ she said, frowning.

He cocked his eyebrow in disbelief. ‘Not sure that’s helpful for Liam right now.’

‘Why not? You know as well as I do those two belong together.’

‘Honey, it’s not that simple for him’ Neal said as he began to get ready for bed. ‘He’s trying to figure things out for himself… and we need to give him the space to do it. Without constant interference.’

She wasn't enjoying the rebuke and changed the subject. ‘So, how did it got downstairs?’

‘I told him he had two days and then, we wanted him out.’

‘How did he take it?’

Neal shrugged. ‘I didn't give him a choice’ he said, leaving out the intense glare Jesse Davis had shot his way. ‘I’m more concerned about how Caitlin’s going to take it.’ 

He slipped into bed next to her.

Sara perched on her elbow to look at him. ‘Well, she’s better off not getting too cosy with a shady guy like that.’

Neal settled in on his back and put his hands behind his head. ‘I’m not sure she’s going to see it that way. But as far as I’m concerned, the less she knows about her brother, the better - I’d rather he leave quietly without making a fuss.’

‘If he really is up to no good, she’ll thank us later.’

Neal glanced at her. ‘Much later… or not at all.’

Sara gave him a quick peck on the cheek. ‘You did the right thing, honey. Short term pain for long term gain.’

WCWCWC

It was just past seven thirty on Monday morning when Jesse Davis settled in at the table of a local coffee shop with an espresso and his trusty phone in his hand. Caitlin had headed off to work first thing and he’d decided to follow her out of the house for a while. Anything was better than having to sit at the kitchen table with Ward and June Cleaver and pretend to make nice. 

He glanced around; it seemed that practically everybody around him had a laptop. He should really get his hands on one of those things; it would make his life a lot easier. He plugged away at his phone, taking advantage of the free wifi to do a little bit of research. 

He began by typing in variations of his host’s name: Neal Caffrey, N. Caffrey, Caffrey, Neal. 

The first thing that popped up was a biography of Neal George Caffrey along with some of his artwork; apparently the guy liked to do some painting in his free time. Jesse perused the images - mostly portraits of a young girl, a boy, some of a woman he recognized as Sara Ellis. Seemed his gallery served as a showplace for his art and that of his daughter Hope Ellis-Caffrey, - at least according to a couple of websites which mentioned the Raphael.

Jesse continued to plug away. There had to be some dirt on this guy. In his experience, no one was lily white - everybody had skeletons in their closet, things they would rather not have come to light. Why should Neal Caffrey be any different? 

He took a sip of coffee and continued down the list of websites with passing mentions of the man. There were a few articles about the opening of the Raphael Gallery in Manhattan a few years back and some stuff about the June Ellington School of Art. One particular piece mentioned how Caffrey had started the school to honour the memory of a woman who’d apparently left him a shitload of money, how he ran the place with the woman’s granddaughter and that his goal was to help give underprivileged kids a chance at a better life… blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

There was another piece, written more recently, which talked about a couple of alumni from the school who had managed to turn their lives around and who credited Neal Caffrey and his staff for helping them straighten out. The article featured a young man by the name of Kevin Barrett who had gained some notoriety as a local artist and was now working out of a loft in SoHo. The guy was quoted as saying that Neal Caffrey had been a mentor to him, an inspiration and that he’d helped him claw his way out of the slums and straight into a bright, promising future. 

Such bullshit!

Who was June Ellington, Jesse wondered, keying in June’s name and watching as a number of new sites popped up. According to the all-knowing world wide web, she was a wealthy widow who’d done a lot of charity work before her death six years earlier, at the ripe old age of ninety-two. Further poking around revealed that she had been married to a man named Byron Ellington - some two bit hustler who’d done time for gambling and embezzlement. That sounded interesting… what was Neal Caffrey’s connection to the late June Ellington and her dead husband? 

And what about the guy - Burke - that Caitlin had mentioned. He worked with Caffrey at the gallery. On a whim, Jesse typed in the name Burke and cross referenced it with the Raphael. A couple of articles appeared and he began to read. One of them mentioned that Peter Burke was a retired FBI agent and that he and Caffrey had met at the Bureau when the younger man had worked there as a consultant.

That led him on a new search, cross-referencing Neal Caffrey with the FBI. His eyes grew to the size of saucers as a slew of articles, mainly stuff from the Bureau website, came up. Stuff about the successful partnership between the two men - one a senior FBI agent and the other an ex-con who’d served four years at Sing Sing and had gotten early release in exchange for his services. It lauded the work of the dynamic duo who’d managed to make a record number of arrests over their many years of working together. 

Jesse went from one link to the next, the smile growing on his face as he began to put the pieces together. Neal Caffrey wasn't just some petty thief; he’d been arrested and convicted of bond forgery and sentenced to four years in a federal penitentiary. Apparently, he’d been a world renowned con artist, suspected of many more crimes and misdemeanours than those he’d been found guilty of, including counterfeiting, racketeering and art theft. He'd eluded the police for almost a decade before his arrest and had been a mastermind at covering his tracks - a bonafide con-man.

Bingo!

That holier-than-thou son of a bitch had a rap sheet as long as his arm and yet, was living his life in a quiet suburb of White Plains as if he had the right to be there. Did the people around him know about his past? What about his wife and kids? His neighbours and friends? Did they know? Most importantly, did Caitlin know her sainted foster dad was a common criminal? She’d always talked about the guy like he was some sort of hero - there was no way she knew he was an ex-con.

He settled back in his chair and smiled wickedly. Apparently, he’d just found a way to extend his stay in New York.

WCWCWC

Neal woke with a major case of morning wood. The fact that his body was curled up against Sara’s warm, soft back only served to heighten the pleasant, libidinous sensation. He groaned as his hips shifted forward and consciousness gradually began to kick in. He glanced over her shoulder at the time: there was almost an hour left before the alarm went off.

He continued with the repetitive motions, his willing body totally overriding his groggy mind. Maybe if he didn't think about it too much and just went with it, things would turn out all right this time. He hadn't yet managed to form a full, coherent thought when he began to feel Sara pushing back against him, further intensifying the oh so pleasant feelings in his nether regions. She let out a moan of her own.

‘Good morning’ she murmured, her voice rough.

‘Morning’ he whispered with a kiss to her shoulder.

‘I see Georgie’s up and at ‘em early this morning’ she added suggestively.

Despite the fact he was barely awake, he rolled his eyes; he hated it when she called his junk by his middle name. She turned to face him, giving him a mischievous smile; apparently she was up for a little one-on-one. A question seemed to pass between their probing gaze: was he?   
Their bodies sought each other despite the less than ideal conditions: morning breath, crumpled sheets, he in his sleep pants and wife beater and she in a pair of yoga pants and a t-shirt - not exactly, romantic stuff yet she could feel him stirring and frankly, she was beginning to feel all hot and bothered herself.

She brought her hands up into his hair and pulled him in for a lingering kiss. ‘Caffrey…’ she whispered.

It sure felt good, the feel of her lips on his, her soft curves pressed up against him - especially after their recent tiff. And yet, Neal hesitated.

‘Honey, it’s all right’ she murmured reassuringly as she ran her hands down his back and pulled up the edge of his undershirt, letting her nails claw at his tender skin.

He shivered at the sensation and let out another groan which Sara felt reverberating throughout her whole body.

‘I don’t know, babe…’ he murmured as he returned his lips to hers.

‘It’s fine’ she said, letting her hand linger down to the edge of his sleep pants and palming him in her hand through the thin material. ‘Just relax and go with it… we’ll take it slow.’

He reacted to her ministrations with an even louder groan and she felt him tense - part pleasure and part apprehension. 

Unbeknownst to Neal, she’d been researching erectile dysfunction online. He hadn't been all that keen on discussing it with her and she’d decided to take the bull by the horns by educating herself on the thorny topic. She was eager to do just about anything to help him conquer the irrational fear which had taken root and had paralyzed him between the sheets. 

At the top of the list of helpful hints was the importance of not putting undue pressure on your man. She’d heeded the advice and given Neal some space to work things out for himself. That being said, when an opportunity popped up suddenly… well, you had to go with it and give it your best shot.

She tried to focus her mind on the task at hand. She didn’t want the whole thing to become too technical, too scripted but she couldn't help but flash back to the article she’d read - mentally ticking off the boxes, one at a time.

✅ first off, don't call it erectile dysfunction to his face  
✅ don't be afraid to try new things  
✅ take the pressure off your partner  
✅ don't rush him  
✅ give him plenty of stimulation  
✅ talk to him, tell him what you want and how you're feeling  
✅ don't be disappointed if things don't end with intercourse

She whispered in his ear, coaxing him along. ‘Baby, why don’t we just take it easy and have some fun… see where it takes us.’ 

So far, so good, Neal thought, feeling himself rising to the occasion. Their last failed attempt had been haunting him for several weeks now and he was reluctant to try again but, damn… Sara was working him like a piston and it felt soooo damn good.

‘Babe…’ he said, his breath faltering. 

‘That feel good?’ she whispered, nibbling on his earlobe. 

‘Yessss, yessss’ he groaned as he shifted slightly on the bed and grabbed onto her hips, pulling her closer.

Of course, the recent misfire had forced Sara to entertain some self doubts of her own. Was it her? Was she no longer as desirable as she’d once been? There’d been a time when the kids where younger when all it took was one glance in his direction and he was on her like a dog in heat. Nowadays, it just took more to get him going and lately, even in optimal conditions, he was struggling with taking things all the way to the finish line. 

He’d tried to reassure her as best he could that it wasn't her; after all, most of the time, he was the one making the opening moves. But when all was said and done, he'd been the one in need of reassurance and Sara had been left to wonder what she could do to make herself more desirable, sexier so she could help him overcome this latest wrinkle. 

‘Sara…’ he murmured breathlessly as she kept working him. His moaning grew louder, his breath hitching as he groaned. ‘Saraaaaa… Saraaaaa…’

She brought one leg up to lay on top of him, seeking some stimulation for herself and letting her thigh take over from her hand, moving her hands up to cradle his face and bringing her lips to his.

‘Feels so good…want you Caffrey’ she whispered.

She wasn't all that big on dirty talk - although she did enjoy being on the receiving end of some suggestive commentary once Neal got going. It couldn't hurt to tell him how good he was making her feel, work at keeping up his interest.

‘Mmmmm’ he murmured, beginning to lose himself in his body’s sensations.

Team player that he was, he let his hand move down between her thighs and he watched her face tense, her eyes fluttering; she’d always said he had magical hands. Meanwhile, Sara fought to stay focussed, not wanting to lose track of her husband’s burgeoning needs despite the fact that what he was doing felt so good. 

‘Damn it Caffrey, what are you doing to me?’

He chuckled wickedly as his hand continued caressing her. He brushed against himself noticing, with disappointment, that he was beginning to deflate despite his definite interest in the proceedings. Damn it! Once again, his body seemed to be letting him down. 

Sara picked up on some hesitation on his part and pulled away to look into his eyes.

‘Neal, honey, look at me’ she murmured but it was becoming obvious by the look on his face that he was already starting to give up on himself. 

He soldiered on, bringing his lips to her neck, in part to keep her from studying his face too closely. Sara fought to keep her wits about her; this was all about helping him regain his confidence and with that in mind, she brought her hand back to the edge of his sleep pants. She slipped her hand inside just as Neal intervened, pulling her hand away, cringing at the thought of her finding out what was happening.

Again.

‘Honey…’ she pleaded, hoping he’d give himself - and her - a chance. ‘Let me try…’

But it was too late; his wounded pride had already gotten the better of him and Neal disentangled himself from her and sat up on the edge of the bed.

‘This isn’t working’ he lamented. ‘Anyway… I forgot, I’ve got an early meeting this morning.’

Sara watched in disappointment as he pole vaulted off the bed and, without looking back, made his way out of the room and straight into the shower.

WCWCWC

By mid-afternoon, Jesse had settled on a plan of action. He stood at the bar of a seedy establishment in the Bronx not terribly far from the June Ellington School of Art, sipping on bourbon and looking for a mark. It didn't take long. He spotted a burly guy with a beard and a beer belly seated a couple of stools over who was arguing with the man next to him, growing louder and more belligerent by the minute. 

He’d do just fine. 

Jesse stood, ostensibly to use the facilities and pretending to lose his footing, he brushed up against the guy, elbowing him as he walked past him.

‘Hey! What’s your problem, buddy?’ the man slurred.

‘Just trying to get by’ Jesse said arrogantly. ‘But your fat ass kinda got in the way.’

The man was instantly on his feet, blocking passage and Jesse stared back at him defiantly.

The man was a couple of inches taller than him, an assortment of tattoos visible on his arms and chest - a real bruiser. He looked like the poster boy for air-head body builders.

‘What’d you say punk?’ the man said combatively. 

Jesse laughed provocatively as a few people started to take notice of what was going on. ‘I said your fat sorry ass got in my way’ he repeated, louder for emphasis.

The reaction, although not exactly painless, was swift as the guy took a swing at Jesse, immediately connecting with the left side of his face.

Perfect.

Jesse pretended to swing for him and the guy had just enough time to give him a swift sucker punch to the ribs before the barkeep came out from behind the bar to try to moderate the escalating conflict. 

The man got another couple of punches in as Jesse bent over, holding his stomach. Ouch. That was going to leave a mark - which was exactly the point.

‘Cut it out, both of you’ the bartender shouted as a group of men began to gather around. ‘That’s enough!’

The big guy stumbled back and let himself fall back on his stool, giving Jesse one last dirty look before returning to his drink. 

He banged loudly against the bar. ‘Another double!’ he ordered as the bartender returned to his spot behind the bar and reached for a bottle of whisky.

Jesse pretended to cower and headed towards the bathroom to survey the damage. He was rather pleased with the results; a bruise was beginning to bloom on the side of his face and he could feel his ribs already screaming from the brutal attack. He took a deep breath and reached into his jeans , palming the short stack of twenties he’d just lifted off the unsuspecting thug and he reached for his pocket knife. Wincing, he brought his hand to the bruise on his face and poked himself with the edge of the knife, watching as a trickle of blood rolled down his cheek. 

His last thought as he stepped out of the decrepit facilities - short term pain for long term gain.

TBC


	22. Chapter 22

_‘How about over here? Is this good?’ Hope asked as she wheeled her uncle Peter to the small desk in the corner. ‘This way you can keep an eye on things, see the customers when they come in.’_

_Peter glanced down at his liver spotted, trembling hands and brought one up to adjust his hearing aid._

_‘What did you say?’ he replied loudly._

_‘Are you good here?’ she asked, practically shouting. ‘Are you comfortable?’_

_He looked up at his goddaughter and nodded. He watched as she locked his chair in place and crouched down to talk to him._

_‘You okay, Uncle Peter?’ she asked as she smiled and adjusted the blanket on his lap._

_He frowned then nodded and she placed a kiss on his forehead as if he were a young child._

_‘You hungry?’ she asked as she got to her feet._

_He ran his tongue along the inside of his mouth, feeling his dentures slipping and wincing at the discomfort._

_‘Why don’t I get you a cup of tea?’ she suggested as he reached for her hand, holding her back._

_‘Do you think I can have a cup of tea?’ he asked._

Elizabeth felt the bed shake as Peter sat up, his breathing loud and uneven.

‘What? What’s wrong?’ she asked sleepily.

Peter looked around the bedroom; he was safe and sound back in Brooklyn. He looked down at his hands, examining them carefully in the early morning light. No sign of liver spots… yet.

‘Just… just a bad dream’ he said breathlessly as he let himself fall back onto the bed.

WCWCWC

Working the early shift at the daycare certainly had its advantages. Of course, it was no fun getting up at 5:00 in the morning and having to face the day before the sun was even up - especially in the winter months. But, on the flip side, the bathroom was always free and she could be in and out in ten minutes, showered and ready to face the day.

Most mornings when she worked the early shift, the rest of the household was still sound asleep at that ungodly hour. While still barely awake, she would tiptoe downstairs and put the dog out in the yard while she made some coffee to take with her on the short trip over to New Rochelle. By the time she was sitting on the bus, nursing her thermos of coffee, she would begin to come alive and when she finally walked into the Blue Skies Daycare Centre a few minutes before seven o’clock, she was ready to welcome the children she would spending the day with.

Working the early shift also meant that she got out of work at 3:00 which left lots of time for more pleasant activities — although these days, that mostly consisted of visiting Linda Bennett’s bedside before making her way back to White Plains for dinner.

On this particular Monday morning, however, she needed to readjust her schedule - perhaps visit her grandmother for a few minutes at lunchtime. After all, it wasn't every day she had her big brother visiting and she wanted to take full advantage of having him around by spending some precious time with him.

Before she’d left the house that morning, Jesse had sat up groggily on the edge of the hide-a-bed while they’d made plans to meet up as soon as her shift ended. He was looking forward to visiting the Raphael and she’d promised to take him over to the Bronx to see the June Ellington School of Art. She’d even hinted that, afterwards, she might spring for Chinese at this place she liked over on Jerome Street. Jesse had readily agreed and mentioned he planned to spend the day looking for work - surely there were odd jobs that needed doing around White Plains. He’d refrained from mentioning his little chat with Neal and he'd neglected to tell her that, in theory, this was his last day in the Caffrey home. It didn't really matter; after he put his little plan in motion, he was confident he’d be in a position to wrangle a few more days of freeloading at Casa Caffrey.

Caitlin had been thrilled to see her big brother standing there in the doorway two days earlier. She’d always envied him his ability to follow his heart, to go wherever he wanted, whenever he wanted, without getting tied down. Jesse Davis’ life was not dictated by convention, he did his own thing and whenever he called to check in on her, he always had plenty of stories to tell her about his exciting exploits in all those wonderful cities he visited.

Jesse had been the product of Jackie Somersby’s roll in the hay with a man she’d met when she’d been barely seventeen years old. Caitlin didn't know much about him; couldn’t even remember the man’s name - well, his first name, that is. All she knew was that her mom had ended up marrying the guy and that he’d stuck around for a couple of years before disappearing, never to be seen or heard from again. For a long time, it had been mother and son, on their own, trying to make ends meet on Jackie’s meagre salary as a waitress.

Jesse had been nine years old when Jackie had gotten knocked up the second time. When pressed by her daughter, Jackie had revealed the name of her biological father - John Bradley. Caitlin had always thought of him more as a sperm donor than anything else, considering he’d been out of the picture even before she was born, leaving Jackie to raise two kids on her own. For the first few years of her life, Caitlin had looked up to her big brother. He was the one who looked out for her on those frequent nights when their mom didn't even bother to come home. He’d make her fried egg sandwiches or beans on toast, read her a bedtime story and tuck her into bed before sneaking out of the house to hang out with some of his friends, often leaving the toddler to fend for herself.

After a while, Social Services had started to come around and by the time Caitlin was ready to start school, she’d been ripped from the arms of her mother and placed in foster care while her mom went into rehab. The plan had always been to have the woman reunite with her kids at some point but Jackie had been arrested shortly thereafter putting the kibosh on that and sending both her kids into the foster care system indefinitely.

Jesse, who was fifteen at the time, was sent to live in a group home upstate while Caitlin was placed in the care of the Duggan family and for the second time, young Caitlin was separated from someone she loved. Mr. Duggan had been kind but totally spineless, incapable of standing up to his wife who ruled the roost, keeping her three foster kids under her thumb and running roughshod over the brood. Five-year-old Caitlin was required to do menial tasks and her self-esteem had taken a beating over the five or so years she’d lived with the family. In the end, Social Services had pulled the children out following an investigation and had moved Caitlin to another district further north, this time.

Through it all, Caitlin and Jesse had maintained contact, although sporadically, as the authorities attempted to keep the siblings from losing touch with one another. But by then, Jesse was a young man, not terribly interested in a kid ten years his junior.

Following their separation, she hadn't heard from him for about three years and then, one day he’d shown up for a reunion of sorts while she was staying with the Stirling family near Cooperstown. He was a legal adult by then, on his own but in no position to take on the care and responsibility of a thirteen-year-old girl and to her dismay, she’d watched him slip away again, leaving her with a family that was more interested in cashing that monthly cheque than properly caring for her. She was miserable and for a while she lived for those phone calls from her brother who, himself, was struggling with the law, charged with misdemeanours including dealing drugs and possession of an illegal arm. He even did some time then reappeared only to disappear again, leaving her confused and hurt.

Meanwhile, Jackie Somersby floated in and out of her life, never well enough to take care of herself, let alone her daughter and Caitlin was moved around to a few other places, never really staying long enough to build any meaningful ties.

It had been a lonely life. Never really feeling like she belonged anywhere and Caitlin rebelled, acting out, being disrespectful and by the time she met Neal Caffrey at the June Ellington School of Art, she was on her third foster home. Miranda Cross, the social worker who worked her case, had begun to lose patience with the rebellious teen and she’d been warned that after three strikes, she’d be relinquished to boot camp. 

She still couldn't believe her luck. On the day Neal invited her to dinner at his place, she wondered if he was some weird perv who wanted a piece of her; it wouldn't be the first time she had to rebuff advances from older men. She’d even used her feminine wiles on occasion to get some cash to buy drugs or cigarettes.

But when she’d walked into the idyllic home of Neal and Sara Caffrey, everything had changed. At first, she’d been envious of Hope and Liam. Hope was smart and beautiful, a talented artist. She was attending a fine arts program at Carnegie Mellon in Pittsburgh, obviously the apple of her father’s eye. Liam, younger and quieter, was a basketball star, a popular guy at White Plains High where both boys and girls fawned over him. Both the Caffrey kids were loved and supported in a way Caitlin could only dream of and her visit to their home had left her resentful but mostly angry at the whole world for the crappy cards she’d been dealt. Little had she known back then that the Caffreys would eventually open their home and their hearts to her.

She finished setting out some toys on the tables and nearby carpet and waited for the first of the children to arrive. These days, life was good. Work was good, having Linda in her life was good, living with the Caffreys was good and now, having Jesse around was good.

Why then did she always feel such an emptiness deep in her soul, this nagging fear that it could all just disappear in the blink of an eye.

WCWCWC

Right around the time Jesse Davis was examining his reflection in the mirror of a shabby bar in Bronx, Neal Caffrey was seated in the passenger’s seat of Peter Burke’s car, preparing to meet with one of the dealers who had sold some art to the owner of the Pruitt Gallery.

As cases went, this certainly wasn't the most challenging but it was always fun to work with Peter on something new, to try to untangle a mystery, to figure something out. Whenever Jones called on Peter for his help and advice, Neal couldn't help but notice a twinkle appear in his partner’s eyes. Sometimes, he wondered if Jones really needed Peter’s help at all or if he just did it to get Peter’s blood pumping a little, help the retired agent feel alive.

Sure, Peter’s job at the Raphael was enjoyable. He loved spending time with Hope and Cameron and working there helped keep his mind sharp and alert. But Neal knew that his best friend’s heart would always be with the Bureau. Peter Burke was an FBI agent through and through and the fact he’d turned in his badge and gun a few years earlier did nothing to change that. His retirement from the Bureau had been a difficult time for the older man, an admission that he no longer had the physical stamina needed to lead such a dynamic team. But there was nothing wrong with Peter’s mind; he was just as sharp as he’d always been and Neal enjoyed those rare moments when they got to work together on a case.

‘How’s your mom doing?’ Peter asked as they navigated traffic in Manhattan.

‘Oh, you know, ups and downs’ Neal sighed. ‘One day, I think this could be the end and then she rallies and looks stronger for a little while.’

Peter glanced over at his buddy. He hated to see him like this; it seemed that lately, he'd had an awful lot on his mind.

‘To be honest, right now, I’m more worried about Caitlin’ Neal added.

‘Caitlin? What did she do this time?’

‘Nothing. It’s not her. It’s her brother. He showed up at our place on the weekend. Out of the blue.’

‘Her brother? I didn't even know she _had_ a brother’ Peter said.

Neal sighed. ‘Well, he's her half-brother, actually. Caitlin’s mom had him when she was just a kid.’

‘So? What’s the problem?’

‘Well, for one thing, I don’t trust him. He showed up with a smarmy smile, a loaded gun and a bag full of narcotics.’

Peter’s eyebrows shot up. ‘And you know this because…’

Neal glared at Peter; that was enough of a response for the older man. Neal always had his ways when it came to finding things out - and sometimes, it was better not to know how he did it.

‘He’s playing us, Peter. I’m sure of it. He gave us this song and dance about wanting to spend time with Caitlin and she fell for it, hook, line and sinker. Next thing I knew, I was inviting him to stay with us for a couple of days.’

‘Oh’ Peter said. ‘And Sara’s good with this?’

Another glare from Neal. ‘Not exactly… Anyway, I gave him until the end of the day to find somewhere else to crash.’

‘So what’s the problem?’

‘Just a feeling…’ Neal said. ‘He’s up to something and I’m worried that when all is said and done, Caitlin’s going to be in tears and Sara and I are going to be left to pick up the pieces.’

‘What’s happening with you and Sara, anyway? Did you finally patch things up?’

Neal thought of their aborted lovemaking that morning. ‘Sort of’ he mumbled.

‘What? You sleeping on the couch?’

‘No. Jesse’s on the couch.’

Peter frowned. ‘Jesse’ Neal repeated. ‘That’s the brother.’

Peter nodded. ‘Is that Piper guy still sniffing around Sara?’

Neal did not looked pleased. ‘She’s spending a day at his apartment on the Upper East Side next week. Says she has to inventory all his stuff.’

‘Is he going to be there? When she does the inventory?’

‘Apparently, he’s going to be out on the west coast attending to _business_ ’ Neal replied, complete with air quotes.

‘He must have a truckload of great stuff’ Peter commented. His mind wandered.

‘Remember Daniel Picah?’ he asked with a chuckle.

‘How could I forget. He had such a hodge podge of stuff, totally incoherent, yet worth millions.’

‘It’d be cool to see what Randall Piper has in his place’ Peter commented. ‘Must be a few treasures hidden there.’

He regretted his words immediately. The last thing Neal needed was any encouragement to go snooping around his wife’s ex’s place. He could tell by the look on Neal’s face that the thought had already crossed his mind.

‘I might… surprise her and pick her up there. Take her out to dinner’ Neal said with a sly smile.

‘Why Neal Caffrey, you sneaky devil’ Peter said.

‘What?’ Neal said with a look of feigned innocence. ‘A guy can't take his wife out to dinner without being accused of having an ulterior motive?’

Peter chuckled; Neal might get away with his little innocent act with most people but he was beyond that, had been for years. He returned to the purpose of their little excursion.

‘With Hope and Cam leaving town, I’m going to have to stick closer to the gallery’ he said. ‘Not sure how much time I can devote to this little investigation Jones has us working on.’

‘Well, let’s see what this guy has to say’ Neal said, pointing ahead. ‘That’s the place.’

WCWCWC

The kids were frolicking in the playground under the watchful eye of Caitlin and her two co-workers when a taxi pulled up right outside the gate. A man slowly climbed out and it took Caitlin but a minute to realize it was Jesse. She glanced down at her watch; it was 2:55.

‘That’s my brother’ she said to one of the other teachers. ‘Mind if I cut out a few minutes early?’

The woman shrugged and Caitlin made her way towards Jesse, watching as he moved away from the cab, limping as he walked in her direction.

‘Jess!’ she called out, opening the gate to join him on the other side. ‘I thought we were meeting at the —’

She stopped dead in her tracks, her eyes drawn to his mangled face. ‘Holy shit! What happened to you?’

He shook his head and she slipped her arm around his waist as he grimaced in pain.

‘I’d always heard there was a lot of crime in New York City’ he moaned.

WCWCWC

When Todd had shown up at Liam’s dorm at noon, he’d had mischief written all over his face. Liam had managed to stand his ground, insisting he needed to get to class and suggesting they meet up for dinner at the commons after class. Todd had reluctantly agreed.

The first year course in business history was the driest, most tedious of all his classes and Liam struggled with concentrating during the three hour session, his mind wandering to his imminent breakup with Todd Greenway. He was done with making lists of pros and cons and seesawing back and forth; he’d finally made the decision to break it off and he was determined to go to bed with the deed done and a clear conscience. He'd thought of little else during his short turnaround trip to North Carolina and after bouncing ideas off his teammate and buddy Josh Monteith, he’d come to the conclusion that the constant distraction was no longer worth it.

Regardless of what might or might not happen with Cody Miller in the future, he needed to remain focussed on his studies and on his increasingly important role as member of the Orange basketball team. His parents were paying big bucks for him to attend Syracuse and the university had invested a lot through their scholarship program as well; it was time to rise up to the occasion and show everyone he was serious about his future.

Class finally ended and Liam jogged over to the student common, arriving slightly out of breath but eager to get the whole mess behind him. He knew it wouldn't be easy for either one of them and he could only imagine how a diva such as Todd was likely to react the news. He didn't have a lot of practice at breaking up. His one and only experience had been with Cody - and their parting of the ways had been arrived at mutually with a great deal of affection and respect. This split had the signs of a much more emotional and heated breakup - certainly more one-sided.

He stepped into the cavernous space and began searching for his soon to be ex-boyfriend, spotting him at a table for two by the window.

‘Hotstuff!’ Todd called out as Liam got closer.

A few students looked around and Liam cringed; the man’s enthusiasm was beyond the pale and only reinforced his resolve to go through with the painfully difficult decision he’d finally arrived at. 

‘Hey Todd’ he said taking the seat across from him.

He glanced around the busy room. Perhaps it had been cowardly of him to suggest they have such a sensitive discussion in a public place but he couldn't imagine it would be much easier to do in private. Todd would undoubtedly react by trying to woo him, using his physical attributes to sway him and Liam had to stay strong until the deed was done. There was safety in numbers and even horny Todd would know better than to throw himself at Liam with half the student body nearby. 

Todd’s hands reached across the table for Liam’s as young Caffrey pulled away.

‘I’ve told you. Would you please… not do that. You know, I don’t like all this public… stuff.’

‘Sure lover’ Todd said with a mischievous grin. He winked. ‘Let’s hurry up and eat and then we can go back to your room and —’

‘We’re _not_ going back to my room, Todd. Josh is there and he’s studying’ Liam said, sounding more self assured than he really felt.

Todd grabbed for his phone. ‘Okay. Well, let me check if Mike is in our room—’ he began as Liam interrupted a second time.

‘Stop it!’ he said his voice growing louder. ‘There’s something I need to tell you.’

He took in a deep gulp of air and looked down at his shaking hands. ‘Todd, this… this isn’t easy for me to say but… well, things aren't working out’ he said, his voice quiet.

‘You’re right. We have to find a place where we can have some privacy. I’m tired of always having to check with our roomies.’

‘No, that’s not what I mean. You and me… it’s not working out, Todd.’

‘Of course it is’ Todd said with a nervous laugh.

‘No Todd! It’s not!’

‘What are you talking about, lover? We’re great together.’

‘Look, you’ve been amazing. I didn't know very many people when I got here last fall. You put me in touch with the LGBT Resource Centre…’

He soldiered on despite the fact that Todd was sitting there with his mouth hanging wide open, obviously in shock. He blinked as he seemed to get his bearings.

‘I put you in touch with the LGBT Resource Centre?’ he repeated, incredulous. ‘That’s what our relationship boils down to?’

‘No… no, of course not. It’s just… when I got here, I didn't know anybody and you’ve helped me feel more at ease and I’ll always be grateful for that.’

‘Stop, stop talking! This is sounding like… are you breaking up with me?’

Liam didn't respond, just looked at the other man, his eyes sad. He shrugged.

‘I thought we had something special, Liam’ he said, leaning in and lowering his voice.

‘We did… I care about you Todd. I care about what happens to you. But when I went home at Christmas, I realized I’m still in love with Cody and… I don’t know if that will ever work out but…’

‘So, you’re dumping me so you can get back together with your ex-boyfriend’ Todd said, his voice growing angry.

Liam looked around, people were starting to stare. ‘No, I’m not. I’m not _with_ Cody.’

‘Then what’s the problem?’ Todd asked. ‘He’s there, you’re here… I’m here. What’s wrong with having a little fun?’

Liam couldn't help but notice the other man’s eyes filling with tears. ‘It’s… it’s me, Todd. I need to concentrate on school and on basketball and right now, this… us… it’s taking up too much of my time and energy.’

A tear escaped Todd’s eyes and rolled down his cheek. ‘I could try to back off a little’ he offered, his voice shaking. ‘I could… give you some space.’

‘No, you can’t’ Liam chuckled wryly. ‘You’re not built that way and I… I love that about you but it’s not what I need right now. I’m sorry. I don’t want to hurt you.’

‘Come on Liam, there’s got to be some way to work this out’ the man said, getting to his feet and moving to sit in the chair next to Liam.

He brought his arm around him but Liam was immediately on his feet, reacting the only way he knew how.

‘I’m sorry Todd. This is the way it’s got to be’ he said.

He took a wide berth around Todd, extricating himself from the other man’s grasp and he made his way to the exit.

It was hard not to but he didn't look back.

WCWCWC

Hope and Neal were working together in the kitchen while Sara sat at the table surrounded by a bunch of pamphlets from the mattress stores she and Neal had visited. She moved them around, making piles - yes, nos, maybes. 

‘What time is your train?’ Neal asked his daughter.

‘First thing Wednesday m-m-morning’ she replied.

‘Why don’t I drive you guys to the station?’ he suggested. ‘Cam can stay over tomorrow night and we can all leave from here.’

Hope considered the offer. ‘I’ll run it by Cam but… thanks, that sounds great.’

‘Are you nervous about going?’ Sara asked, piping up. That little stutter was a dead giveaway.

‘Not nervous just… you know, the Armstrongs are really strict and…’

Neal and Sara exchanged knowing looks and nodded. Hope was uncomfortable with the insinuation and thought better to change the subject.

‘So, what’s he like? This Jesse?’ she asked her dad.

‘I’m not really sure. We haven't seen that much of him’ Neal replied, turning down the boiling water and adding a couple of handfuls of pasta. ‘But he’s leaving tomorrow.’

‘Aww, that’s too bad. I’m sure Caitlin is enjoying having him around.’

She picked up on some tension between her parents and glanced back at her mom. ‘What is it? What am I missing?’

‘Your dad found out some stuff about him… It looks like this guy’s not really who he says he is.’

‘What do you mean? Like he’s not really her brother?’ Hope asked, taking a seat next to her mom.

‘No, not that. He’s just… we think he’s hiding something’ Sara clarified.

‘What makes you say that?’ Hope asked.

Neal sighed loudly. ‘He’s… just call it a vibe’ he replied, not particularly wanting to ‘fess up to the fact that he’d searched the guy’s luggage. ‘He looks like trouble and I don’t want him upsetting Caitlin.’

Hope nodded in agreement. ‘That’s the last thing she needs with Grandma being so sick and everything.’

She looked around the room as if expecting Caitlin to appear. ‘So, where is he?’

‘Caitlin is showing him the gallery and the school and then, she’s taking him out for dinner’ Neal explained.

Sara’s eyes returned to the table, covered in pamphlets and pointed. ‘What do _you_ think, Hope? Between these two?’

Hope chuckled. ‘Mom! How am I supposed to know that when I haven't even tried them?’

Sara shrugged and Neal came over to look down at the two options Sara seemed to have zeroed in on. If he played his cards right, maybe he could end this madness once and for all and not have to step back into the store to do it.

‘Oh, good choice honey!’ he said with fake enthusiasm. ‘They were my two favourites too.’

‘Shut up!’ Sara said with a giggle as she pushed him away playfully. ‘You don't give a rat’s ass what we sleep on.’

‘That’s not true’ Neal replied, indignant. ‘I have very discriminating tastes… in all things’ he said, leaning down to kiss the top of her head. ‘Especially women.’

Hope watched with interest; she didn't know how he did it but her dad was a master manipulator when it came to his mom. Most arguments were resolved with a hug or a smile and yet, Sara was a willing participant; she knew exactly what was happening. Such a strange dynamic those two had.

The sound of the front door was heard opening in the distance, followed by two voices, one male, one female. Neal and Sara exchanged surprised looks; they weren’t expecting Caitlin back until much later.

‘We’re in here!’ Sara called out as their foster daughter appeared followed by Jesse who was holding on to his side.

All eyes were drawn to the man’s face as he limped into the room.

‘Oh my God! What happened?’ Sara asked, getting to her feet.

‘Jesse was mugged!’ Caitlin announced.

TBC


	23. Chapter 23

Liam couldn't get away from Todd Greenway fast enough. He marched straight over to his dorm, bolted up the stairs to the fourth floor and sprinted down the hall towards his room. He did not pass go nor did he collect two hundred dollars. He was riddled with guilt at having had to hurt Todd that way - and yet, he was strangely relieved it was finally over. 

When he finally reached his room, he stepped in, closed the door behind him and stood upright against it, his breathing shaky and looking like he’d just escaped the clutches of a madman - which technically, he had. 

‘Hey’ Josh called out, looking up from where he was reading at his desk. 

‘I did it’ Liam said breathlessly.

Josh got to his feet in silence and headed over to the small fridge in the corner of the room. He pulled out two beers, stared down at them for a few seconds, then thought better of it and pulled out a couple of soft drinks. He handed one to his roomie and perched himself on the edge of his desk, his long, lanky legs crossed at the ankles.

‘Now that’s something worth celebrating’ he said as he lifted the can in a salute and took a swig.

Liam took a few steps into the room and let himself fall helplessly onto his bed, setting the can of pop aside. He didn't feel much like celebrating.

‘So he took it hard?’ Josh asked. 

‘I knew he would.’

‘Well, for what it’s worth, I think you did the right thing. The guy was sucking the life right out of you.’

Liam sat in silence, reliving the last few minutes, recalling the look of hurt and disappointment in the other man’s eyes.

‘I’m never dating anyone ever again’ he finally said as he grabbed the can and popped it open.

‘You’re kidding, right? It’s like those people who lose a pet and swear they’ll never get another. They’re down at the SPCA the next day checking out the puppies.’

Liam glared at him. ‘Todd’s no puppy’ he said, his voice curt.

‘Well, he has those puppy dog eyes’ Josh replied, hoping to lighten the mood.

‘He acted like I was cutting off his oxygen’ Liam whined. ‘I knew he’d be upset but…’

‘Well, you should brace yourself for act two. I’ll bet you haven't heard the last of him.’

‘I can’t do this again’ Liam complained, taking a sip from his drink. 

‘You might have to’ Josh said. ‘Just be strong, Caffrey. Keep your eye on the prize.’

‘Right’ Liam mumbled. ‘Now I have to try to avoid him as much as possible.’

‘You do have that business class with him on Thursdays’ Josh reminded him.

It was a hard thing to forget. ‘I’ll just have to… muddle through.’

‘Did you get your room key back?’

‘Shit!’ Liam exclaimed. ‘I totally forgot. It wouldn't have been the right time to bring it up, anyway.’

Josh shrugged. ‘I could talk to him if you want.’

‘Thanks but I’d like look a pussy if I sent you to do my dirty work for me. I’ll… figure it out.’

Josh looked over at his friend and sighed. ‘I hate to add to your woes but the coach called a meeting for seven o’clock.’

‘Great!’ Liam said with sarcasm. 

WCWCWC

Everybody rallied around Jesse Davis as Caitlin led him by the arm to the kitchen table, helping him sit down. His eye was swollen and there was a cut on the side of his face.

Sara rushed to get an icepack from the freezer while Neal and Hope, stood by, dumbfounded.

‘What happened?’ Hope asked.

Jesse looked the young woman up and down, appreciatively. ‘You must be Hope’ he said with a naughty grin. ‘It’s nice to meet you. I’d get up but…’

Neal did a double take. Was this guy really flirting with Hope?

‘Jesse was on his way to the job centre and he was attacked by a couple of thugs’ Caitlin explained.

She took the ice pack from Sara’s hand and applied it to her brother’s face as gently as she could. Jesse leaned forward and held on to his side, grimacing.

‘The assholes got me good’ he said, lifting his shirt and displaying the beginnings of a bruise on his ribs. ‘But worst of all, they took every damn cent I had on me. Credit card, bank card. Everything’s gone.’

Neal frowned as he listened; this whole thing sounded highly suspicious. But then again, only a person who’d spent years conning others might be inclined to think that way.

‘I was going to book a room at the Y but…’ Jesse said, rubbing his side.

‘Don’t worry about that’ Caitlin said, fussing over him. ‘You can stay here… with us. Right Mr. C?’

Neal and Sara exchanged knowing looks. This was the textbook definition of being caught between a rock and a hard place. 

‘Did you report the mugging to the police?’ Neal asked instead of responding to Caitlin’s question.

‘You’re kidding, right? Doesn’t this kind of thing happen every day here in New York?’ the man said with a scoff.

‘Where did it happen exactly?’ Neal asked.

Jesse was ready with a response. ‘About two blocks from the job centre.’

‘You were attacked in broad daylight on Jarvis Street?’ Neal asked, incredulous. That was a pretty nice part of town and everybody knew most muggings took place under the cover of darkness.

‘I was walking down a side street’ Jesse said with just the smallest of hesitations. 

‘Still…’ Neal commented. ‘We don’t have many muggings in that part of town.’

Jesse looked up at Hope with a playful grin. ‘Just lucky I guess’ he said.

Neal picked up on the small exchange and felt his skin crawl. What was this guy up to? Had he really been mugged? And if not, how did he get those all too real bruises on his face and ribs?

He thought he’d push the envelope and see what reaction he might get - poke the bear, so to speak. He grabbed for the phone and pretended to dial.

‘I’m going to call it in’ he said.

Jesse remained cool. ‘Is there really any point? I hear they don’t do much in cases like this. I’m just pissed off. Everything I had was in my wallet: cash, credit card.’

‘I told you’ Caitlin said. ‘You don’t have to worry about that. You can stay here with us.’

Jesse smiled at his baby sister. ‘Thanks sis’ he said with a wink. He turned to look over at Neal, practically daring him to contradict her. ‘I really appreciate it… Neal.’

Neal gave him a forced smile. He knew he was getting scammed, he just didn't know what this guy’s end game was. 

At least not yet.

WCWCWC

‘Remember when those thugs kidnapped June?’ Neal said as he and Sara were getting ready for bed.

She frowned. ‘You mean that guy who was looking for that printing plate?’ 

He nodded. 

Sara pulled back the covers and climbed into bed. ‘Why are you bringing that up? That was like twenty years ago.’

‘They were hiding June in that warehouse and I had to find a way to sneak her out of there’ Neal recalled.

Sara remembered the incident all too well, how Neal had come home with fresh stitches on his forehead. She ran her hand over the faint outline which was still visible over his left eye. ‘And you gave yourself a nasty bump on the head so she could escape.’

‘Yeah, I let them believe June had ambushed me.’

Sara seemed to struggle to understand. ‘So what are you saying? You think Jesse did this to himself?’

Neal shrugged.

‘But honey, nobody can give themselves that kind of hit to the ribs - unless you’re some sort of contortionist’ Sara reasoned.

‘What if he picked a fight with someone on purpose, provoked them into hitting him.’

‘Honey, don’t you think that’s a little over the top?’

‘What? You think it’s a coincidence that he gets mugged on the very day he was supposed to move out? Now, he can play the sympathy card, freeload off of us for as long as he wants.’

‘I don’t know, Neal… I think you’ve been hanging around Mozzie too long. Maybe it’s just what it looks like, bad luck.’

‘He knew we wouldn't be able to kick him out if he didn't have a penny to his name’ Neal argued. ‘And he knew Caitlin would come to his defence.’

‘But why? What does he gain from staying here? It’s not like we have gold bars hidden up in the attic.’

Neal settled in next to her in bed. He had to admit he didn't have all the answers. Yet. All he knew was that none of this was sitting right with him. The guy was clearly up to something and Caitlin was right in the middle of it, just waiting to get hurt.

‘I think I’ll call Jones in the morning. See if he can run a background check on him’ Neal said with a yawn. 

Sara curled up against him. ‘Don’t let Caitlin find out. She’ll be hurt.’

‘Honey, if I don't do something, he could hurt her a lot worse’ he reflected.

‘Just… just don’t lose your cool with him, okay? Don’t go accusing him without any proof.’

He thought he heard the echo of Peter’s voice in there somewhere.

‘Me? Lose my cool?’ he said with a mischievous grin. ‘When do I ever lose my cool?’

‘Not often, I’ll admit but… when it comes to the kids, I’ve seen you go all ‘poppa bear’ from time to time. Like that time, that boy stole Liam’s bus pass. You put the fear of God in that poor kid.’

‘Got his bus pass back, though, didn't I’ he said with a grin.

She kissed his cheek and gave him a broad smile. ‘Yes you did, oh wonderful husband.’

Neal smiled then grew serious. ‘She’s had enough to deal with’ he said wistfully. 

Somehow Sara sensed he wasn't just talking about Caitlin any more. Every time their foster daughter got hurt, it was a reminder of just how much he’d suffered as a kid, how hard it had been to claw his way out from under the difficult life he’d had to endure during his youth.

‘Honey, look at you. You found a way out of a really bad situation.’ 

‘Sara…’ he said, his tone incredulous. ‘I’m an ex-con, I was a master forger and a thief for crying out loud. Is that really what we want for her?’

‘Of course not, Neal. But everybody has their path in life and… granted, yours was particularly difficult but it made you the man you are today, loving, compassionate, an amazing father. She’ll pull through just like you did. And besides, you didn't have anyone there for you, Caitlin’s got us to fall back on and watch out for her.’

Neal grew quiet. He knew he worried way too much when it came to Caitlin Somersby but he remembered all too well the pain he’d suffered as a kid, the issues of abandonment he’d struggled with his whole life, the many masks he’d been forced to cultivate and wear in order to cover up all that pain and anguish. All those fake smiles, the fraudulent air of confidence he exuded just to survive; hell, half the time he’d even managed to talk himself into believing those wild fabrications.

He pulled Sara into his arms and she willingly settled, her head against his chest. They both had ghosts from their pasts, regrets they’d had to learn to let go of and some days were easier than others. Luckily, they had each other - no artifice, no deceptions, no pretence, just one hundred percent honesty, at least as it pertained to the important stuff. 

‘Come here’ he murmured as he squeezed her tight.

She couldn't help but notice the tremor in his voice. 

WCWCWC

Despite exhaustion, Neal couldn't get to sleep. He kept tossing and turning while Sara snoozed, apparently without a care in the world. None of this mess with Jesse was sitting right with him and he needed to do something - anything - to get to the bottom of it. His spidey senses were tingling like crazy and if there was one thing Neal could be sure of, it was his instincts; they were rarely wrong. 

He could hear Peter’s voice in his head, repeating the age-old mantra he’d heard him utter on so many occasions over the years.

‘Neal, we need evidence.’

Their diametrically opposed styles had been a bone of contention between the two men during all the years they’d worked together at the FBI and it remained a sore spot to this day. Neal was notorious for flying by the seat of his pants, jumping in without much forethought and often taking unnecessary risks whereas Peter had always favoured a slow, methodical approach to crime solving, leaving both men frustrated by what they perceived as the other man’s shortcomings. 

Basically, it boiled down to this: Neal wanted things done NOW and Peter wanted things done RIGHT.

Years later, Neal still struggled with issues of impulse control and he lay there in bed under the cover of night, reminding himself to breathe and to think things through. The stakes in this situation were high; any unwarranted attack against Caitlin’s brother would only serve to exacerbate the tension in his already fragile relationship with his foster daughter. 

There were a couple of ways of getting to the truth. Neal could confront Jesse, share his suspicions, hold him to account, demand some answers. It wasn't exactly his style and worse yet, that approach might come back to bite him in the ass. If Jesse Davis really had been the victim of a mugging and Neal wigged out on him without proof, Caitlin would get upset - and understandably so.

The other option, more in line with his talents, was to poke around and see if he could find the man’s wallet - the one he’d allegedly been robbed of while strolling through the streets of New York. If Jesse had made the whole story up, his wallet would be around somewhere, perhaps in his jeans pocket or stuffed in the bottom of his duffel bag or worse yet, if he was particularly paranoid, stashed under his pillow as he slept. 

Neal thought back to his cat burglar days - or was that cat burglar nights? All those times he did recon or carried out a job in his signature black clothes while the rest of the world slept. Sneaking around required skill, self-assuredness but more importantly, perfect timing. If he wanted to catch Jesse off guard, there was no better time than to snoop around while the man was sound asleep. 

He glanced at the bedside clock. It was going on two thirty and except for the sound of the furnace going off every few minutes, the house was perfectly still. Raffie, who usually slept downstairs, was lying at the foot of their bed, seemingly seeking comfort from his familiar humans instead of the stranger who was presently occupying the hide-a-bed down in the family room. 

With one last glance in Sara’s direction, Neal grabbed for his phone off the night table, stuffing it into his pyjama pocket and he rolled out of bed, padding barefoot towards the door as he sidestepped the sleeping dog. The hallway was quiet, the door to Caitlin’s room closed. He hadn't heard a sound coming from Hope’s room since he and Sara had first gone to bed and he glanced furtively up the staircase to the third floor, noticing there was no light coming from above. 

In his heyday, Neal Caffrey had been a very successful cat burglar. He possessed that rare balance of sure-footedness and audacity that enabled him to sneak in and out of pretty well any place he wanted, undetected. It took a lot of nerve to move stealthily and confidently without being found out and Neal excelled at the task - something he’d mastered years before. Of course, if you’re going to go on a fishing expedition, there was nothing like doing it in the familiar surroundings of your own home and Neal was feeling particularly emboldened as he tiptoed down the staircase. He craftily avoided the creak on the third step from the top, the one he’d been meaning to repair since the day they’d first moved into their house all those years ago. 

He heard some soft snoring coming from downstairs, an encouraging sign and he held his breath as he peeked around the corner and spotted Jesse Davis’ sleeping form. The full moon made the room easy to navigate and Neal began by slinking quietly into the kitchen and silently pouring a glass of water from the Brita pitcher in the refrigerator. He carried the glass over to the family room and set it down on one of the side tables within easy reach. If Jesse woke up and found him sneaking around, it would serve as a prop, something he could grab in order to explain why he’d been lurking around downstairs in the middle of the night. 

Couldn't sleep… got thirsty…sorry to wake you.

Some clothing was strewn on the floor by the bed: a jacket, a shirt and a pair of jeans. Neal crept over and picked up the shirt, checking the pockets and discarding it immediately upon ascertaining that they hid nothing of interest. Same thing with the jacket. The jeans were next and it took a little longer to check every single pocket: nothing but a cheap lighter and the man’s phone, set on vibrate.

On impulse, Neal stuffed the phone in his sleep pants’ pocket next to his own and continued his search, reaching for the duffel bag that lay half open by the bed. He decided it was more prudent to carry out his search at the front of the house where he could rummage through it without fear of detection and he picked it up and carried it into the living room, out of the man’s field of vision should he wake in the meantime.

Neal took Jesse’s phone out of his pocket and began poking away at it, noticing the message app was open. It was amazing how many people didn't bother with a password, something he was grateful for more than ever on this particular occasion. He brought up the man’s last texts, from the previous evening, an exchange between Jesse and a local number, no name. 

212-668-7283: Might be interested 

Jesse: Have pics

212-668-7283: Kk meet tomorrow 4 at Clives on Amsterdam

Jesse: I’ll be there

Neal was about to check and see what photographs Jesse might be referring to when he was interrupted by the family dog lumbering down the stairs, panting loudly. Neal cringed. 

‘Shit!’ he said, under his breath. 

Raffie looked up at him with innocent eyes and gave a familiar whine. 

Neal glared at him. ‘You’re kidding me!’ 

He left the duffel bag on the couch in the living room and led the way back to the family room and the patio door that led to the backyard, a mere five or six feet away from where Jesse Davis lay snoring. Neal tried to reassure himself; surely, even if he stirred, the man wouldn't be searching for his bag in the middle of the night.

As luck would have it, Jesse opened his eyes, squinting against the moonlight.

‘What the fuck?’

‘Sorry’ Neal whispered. ‘The dog needed to go to the bathroom.’

Jesse groaned and turned over, reaching for his jeans on the floor.

Holy shit! The guy was looking for his phone - which was presently safely tucked away in Neal’s silk pyjama bottom.

Neal spoke in order to deflect the man’s attention as he made his way over to stand next to pile of clothes on the floor. 

‘I’ll be out of your way in just a minute’ he said as he leaned down on the pretext of helping Jesse reach for his jeans. ‘When he decides he needs to pee…’

With Jesse’s jeans in one hand, Neal reached into his pocket with the other and felt for the phone, slipping it out and letting it drop. The phone made a loud clatter as it hit the hard wood floor.

‘Sorry’ he mumbled as if it had accidentally fallen out of the jeans pocket.

‘I got it, I got it’ Jesse mumbled impatiently as he picked the phone up off the floor.

Please don't notice your bag is gone! Please don't notice your bag is gone!

Jesse glanced down at his phone groggily and immediately put it back in his jeans pocket. He turned over and pulled the blankets over his head as Neal sighed in relief.

Raffie barked, letting everybody within a mile radius know he was finished doing his business and Neal let him back in, making his way back to the staircase and taking a few tentative steps up towards the second floor.

‘Come on Raffie’ he said for good measure. 

He waited a few seconds and tiptoed back down and into the living room, eager to get this little op over and done with. It was darker at the front of the house than it had been in the family room and he proceeded mostly by touch, his hand brushing up against the now familiar bottle of whiskey and the gun stashed in the bottom of the bag. He pushed past some soft clothes and found something hard wrapped up in one of the shirts. He unravelled it, his eyes growing at the discovery. 

An old worn brown leather wallet. 

With a quick glance to make sure Jesse hadn't left the family room, Neal tiptoed over to the powder room nearby, closing the door behind him and turning on the light.

As suspected, there was Jesse Davis’ wallet. It contained $840 in cash, various credit cards including two in names that were not Jesse Davis, a public library card, an air miles card and several other loyalty cards. Not wanting to press his luck, Neal pulled out his own phone, taking a few photographs of the contents. Seeing proof of the man’s deceit was all he needed but if push came to shove, and he sincerely hoped it never would, it would be evidence he could share with Caitlin. 

Neal crept back to the living room, put things back the way he’d found them and carried the duffel bag back to the family where he’d found it. Satisfied that Jesse was still sound asleep, he grabbed for the glass of water and headed upstairs.

He was back in bed within seconds, his heart beating wildly in his chest. He curled up against Sara’s back and heard her mumble something in her sleep. Despite the vindication he felt at having his suspicions confirmed, he was disappointed, mostly for Caitlin. 

And now, he had even more questions than before, something that kept him awake for a long, long time. 

WCWCWC

By mid-morning the next day, Neal had begun to map out a strategy in order to get to the bottom of the Jesse mystery. He hadn’t yet had the opportunity to confront him about what he’d found; Caitlin had stuck to him like glue at breakfast and besides, he needed to think things through and be smart about how he handled the situation. 

Now that he knew the man was lying, he needed to find out just how deep the deceit went. Was it simply a case of wanting to freeload? Was it so he could play the sympathy card with Caitlin? And what about those cryptic texts? What did it all mean?

He’d already put in a call to Jones and asked for his help. If Jesse Davis had been involved in anything sketchy, perhaps he’d show up on the FBI’s radar. It was certainly worth a try. Jones had also agreed to see what he could find out from local authorities in Florida considering that was the last place Jesse had stayed.

Neal was sitting at his desk, preparing to call in another favour when there was a knock on the door to his office and Caitlin peeked in with Jesse lurking behind her.

‘Hi Mr. C!’ she called out. ‘I’m giving Jesse a tour.’

‘Always proud to show off the school’ Neal said, getting to his feet. 

‘Welcome!’ he added, sweeping the room with his hands. ‘This is where all the magic happens.’ 

The young man smiled and nodded and Neal matched him with a toothy grin. Two could play that game.

‘Caitlin tells me this is where the two of you met.’

‘That’s right’ Neal said putting his arm around the young woman’s shoulder. ‘She was my best student.’

‘We’re going to go to the gallery next’ Caitlin said with enthusiasm. ‘I want to show Jess where we display our stuff.’

Neal nodded. ‘You’ll see what an amazing sculptor Caitlin is. We’re really proud of her.’

‘So am I’ Jesse said with a wide grin.

You don't know the first thing about this wonderful young woman Neal wanted to say. Instead, he cleared his throat and swallowed. ‘Make sure you show him that piece you’ve been working on’ he said, covering up his increasing anger.

‘I hear you’re an amazing painter yourself’ Jesse said. ‘Caitlin showed me some of the stuff you’ve got down in your studio.’

He stopped for a moment, making sure he had Neal’s full attention. ‘I’ll bet if you put your mind to it, you could produce an actual masterpiece - you know, like those master forgers.’

The comment went right over Caitlin’s head but Neal felt a shiver run down his spine. What the hell? Was the remark made in passing or was he hinting at something? Had this guy dug into his past and found out about Neal’s illustrious career as a con artist and his time in jail?

He studied the young man’s face for a moment, noticing his smug grin. Jesse kept staring at him, as if waiting for a reaction but there was no way Neal was going to give him the satisfaction. 

Despite his unease, Neal recovered quickly. ‘So, should we expect you two home for dinner?’ he asked, his voice remaining steady.

‘No, I’m taking Jesse to that Chinese place I like, the one we never made it to yesterday.’

Neal returned to his desk and pointed to the stack of papers scattered across it. ‘Well, I guess I better get back to it’ he said. ‘You two have fun.’

Caitlin took Jesse’s arm and led him out and Neal listened as their voices receded down the hall.

With the door closed behind them, Neal became aware that his heart was thumping madly in his chest. He had the distinct impression that Jesse’s comment was meant as some sort of veiled threat, a way of telling him he knew all about Neal Caffrey’s past and insinuating that he wouldn’t hesitate to share it with his little sister if he had to.

Neal looked past all the paperwork on his desk and reached for the phone.

‘Moz’ he said breathlessly. ‘I need your help.’

TBC


	24. Chapter 24

Sara was catching up on e-mails when Lydia Jordan appeared in the doorway to her office.

‘Hey!’ she called out. ‘Got a minute?’

‘Yeah, sure. Come on in’ Sara replied, tearing her eyes away from her computer screen. ‘What’s up?’

‘I’ve heard whispers about a Thompson floating around out there from one of our informants’ Lydia explained as she let herself fall in the chair across from Sara.

‘Whispers?’

They’d been on the lookout for a Thompson reported missing from the home of a New York socialite, a wealthy client of Sterling Bosch.

‘Word on the street is that there’s one for sale out there but I don’t know if it’s ours.’

Sara reached into the top drawer of her desk and pulled out the list she always kept handy: a master list of stolen art, worldwide. Insurance companies benefitted from keeping each other informed whenever they heard rumblings about something out there. Quid pro quo - everyone benefitted from the arrangement. 

‘There are two Thompsons floating out there’ Sara said, checking the list. ‘One is ours, the other is insured by Gideon Insurance in Toronto.’

‘Do you want me to follow it up?’

‘Yeah, do you have time?’

‘I’ll make time’ Lydia replied, noticing something was a little off with her boss and close friend. ‘What’s the matter with you? You look distracted. I thought you’d still be on a high with the Piper account within reach.’  
‘I am. It’s… it’s nothing, just… stuff at home’ Sara replied with a wave of her hand.

‘Is it Neal?’ Sara had been confiding about her husband’s health issues lately.

‘No. Well, not directly anyway. Remember I told you Caitlin’s long lost brother showed up on our doorstep last weekend? Well, Neal found out the guy’s been lying to us.’

Lydia crossed her legs, settling in to hear the tale.

‘He came home with a bunch of bruises, said he’d been mugged’ Sara explained. ‘But Neal snooped around and found the guy’s wallet with everything intact.’

‘So, he lied about being mugged. Why?’

‘I don’t know. Neal asked his contacts at the Bureau to check and see if the guy has a record. Personally, I think he’s just a bum who wants a place to crash… Neal thinks it could be more.’

‘Is he going to confront him?’

‘That’s the plan but he doesn't want to do it in front of Caitlin’ Sara explained.

The two women looked up as Sara’s assistant poked her head through the door. ‘Ms. Ellis, Mr. Piper is here and he wants to know if you have a minute to see him.’ 

Lydia looked at her friend, noticing a little bit of colour blooming in her cheeks. ‘Mr. Piper’ she mouthed, teasing her boss.

Sara frowned at her and got to her feet, smoothing her skirt. ‘Of course, send him in Wanda.’

WCWCWC

‘You think they’re headed here next?’ Peter said into the phone.

‘Yeah, they left here about an hour ago. Just… just check him out, let me know what you think’ Neal replied at the other end.

‘Well, what am I looking for, exactly?’

Neal seemed to grow frustrated. ‘I don’t know Peter… I just have a feeling he’s up to something. He’s been lying ever since he got here. Just keep your eyes open.’

‘All right, all right. I’ll do my best.’

‘I’ve got Mozzie keeping an eye on him when he meets up with… whoever he’s meeting up with at four o’clock but in the meantime, I’m headed over to visit my mom. Call me on my cell if you have anything to report, okay?’

‘Gotcha. Oh, I see them outside. Gotta go’ Peter said before hanging up.

He spotted Caitlin through the shop’s window, smiling and looking more relaxed than he’d seen her look in a dog’s age. He knew her pretty well and even when she was smiling, Caitlin always struck him as having this sadness about her. Now, he could see her laughing heartily, totally carefree, a young man following close behind her. He took a moment to examine him through the glass. Good looking, a little shorter than himself, shifty eyes. Okay, maybe he was imagining the shifty eyes. He got up and walked to the door, intent on welcoming the twosome.

‘Hey Caitlin’ he called out as they stepped into the gallery. ‘What brings you here?’

‘Hey, Mr. B’ she said with those blue eyes of hers sparkling. ‘I brought a special guest. This is my brother, Jesse.’

The young man gave Peter a bright smile but it made Peter shiver; he could see the same kind of mischievous look he'd seen in Neal’s eyes back when they’d first met, those eyes that seemed to look right through you, trying to figure out what you were thinking - and how he could play you.

‘Hi’ Peter said, putting out his hand. ‘Welcome to the Raphael.’

‘Wow! You weren't kidding, sis. This place is impressive’ the man said, glancing around.

He began to stroll around the main room, examining the art work and nodding in appreciation.

‘So where do you keep your stuff?’ he asked his baby sister.

She didn't need to be asked twice. She laced her arm in his and ushered him over to the staircase leading up to the second floor, the room where she, Neal and Hope displayed their various works of art.

Hope and Cameron were coming down the stairs just as the siblings stepped onto the first riser.

‘Hello again’ Jesse called out with a flirty smile aimed directly at Hope. ‘I was hoping I’d bump into you.’

Cameron looked from the man over to his fiancée; who the hell was this guy? Or perhaps more to the point, who the hell did he think he was?

Hope smiled politely and Cam couldn't help but reach out possessively and take her hand in his.

‘Hi’ he said putting out his other hand. ‘I don’t believe we’ve met. Cameron Armstrong, I’m Hope’s fiancé.’

The point he was making was clear and Jesse smiled back, cockily. ‘Fiancé?’ he said, shaking Cam’s hand but looking over at Hope. ‘I didn't know you had a fiancé.’

Hope raised her eyebrows in response. Getting attention from a good looking young man was something every woman enjoyed but that was as far as it went. She grabbed on to Cameron’s arm and squeezed.

‘Now you know’ she said with a confident smile.

WCWCWC

Neal was pleasantly surprised to find his mom sitting up in bed when he walked into her room. He couldn't remember the last time she’d been awake when he arrived for a visit. Usually, she was snoozing and she tried valiantly to stay awake while he was there. She wasn't always successful.

‘Mom!’ he said from the doorway as she looked up.

‘Hi honey’ she responded, her voice hoarse.

He made his way over to her, leaning down to kiss her forehead. She smelled good, her hair freshly washed. 

‘You smell nice’ he commented as he sat on the edge of her bed. ‘And you look nice.’

He ran his hand through her soft grey hair and she smiled just like a young girl. She forced herself to sit up straight and Neal brought his arm around her back to steady her. She let out a wet cough - par for the course.

‘I already ate’ she announced once she got her breath back.

Neal snickered; why was it that people over eighty years of age were so fixated on their bodily functions: eating, sleeping, bowel movements… Was that what awaited him in another twenty years?

‘Yeah, I’m sorry I’m a little late. I got held up at school. Caitlin came by to visit with her brother.’

‘That’s why I haven't seen her since the night before last’ Linda said, her voice weak.

‘She’s showing him around the school and the gallery. She’s really excited to have him here.’

Linda studied her son for a moment, sensing his unease. ‘What is it you’re not telling me?’

Although they’d only been sharing each other’s lives for a short time, the woman knew her son inside out and vice-versa.

‘I’m not sure he’s exactly as advertised’ Neal admitted readily. ‘And I don’t want Caitlin getting hurt.’

‘You think he might be playing her?’ Linda asked. She’d been around the block a few times.

Neal saw no point in pretending with his mom. She was an important ally when it came to Caitlin; perhaps her insight into the matter would be beneficial, help him see more clearly.

‘He pretended he had his wallet stolen but I snooped around and found it - complete with over eight hundred bucks. And that’s not all. He’s carrying a gun and some narcotics, probably to sell.’

‘Oh no. Poor Caitlin. Sounds like all he can bring her is more heartache. And just when she’d begun to settle down.’

She examined Neal’s face, noticing those lines forming on his forehead. ‘She has settled down a little, hasn't she honey?’

Neal thought back over the last couple of weeks. Ever since that night he’d picked her up at that party, drunk out of her mind, Caitlin had been making a concerted effort to behave. But it was as if she was standing over a precipice and could tumble into oblivion at any moment. Neal feared that any upset, big or small, would be enough to push her over the edge.

‘After she had that run-in with Liam, she seemed to settle down a bit. But she’s fragile, Mom.’

Linda adjusted her oxygen cannula and smiled at her son, squeezing his hand. 

‘I know you talk to her every chance you get…’ Neal continued, his voice tentative. ‘I really appreciate everything you’ve done for her.’

‘I’m just trying to get her ready for the inevitable…’ the woman said, her voice sad.

‘Mom… don’t!’ Neal pleaded.

‘Oh honey, there’s no point in pretending, I can feel myself slipping away. I won’t be able to hold on much longer.’

Neal felt his throat tighten. He nodded, momentarily unable to speak.

‘Promise me you’ll keep an eye on her after I’m gone. And promise me you won’t give up on her. She has a beautiful soul.’

Neal stared at her, his vision growing blurry. He coughed and sighed, willing the tears away. 

‘She’s so fragile and she’s been through so much’ Linda said. ‘I left you when you needed me and I’ve spent my whole life regretting it… and now I have to leave her.’

Neal could see the regret in his mother’s eyes. ‘Mom… you’ve been amazing with her, you’ve accomplished things I haven't been able to. You’ll leave a lasting impression on her for as long as she lives.’

Linda grew more thoughtful as old regrets returned. ‘I’m sorry Neal’ she said, her voice growing shaky. ‘I’m so sorry I wasn't there for you.’

Neal squeezed her hand. ‘Mom, I’ve told you a hundred times. I forgive you. I’m just so thankful we’ve had this time to… reconnect.’

She nodded and he could see from the way her eyelids fluttered that she was growing weary.

‘Why don’t you close your eyes and I’ll sit here for a while. I don’t have to be anywhere for the next hour or so.’

He pulled out a magazine from his book bag and held it up. It was Vanity Fair, one of her favourites.

‘I can even read to you if you like.’

She shook her head, forcing her eyes to remain open. ‘Neal, watching me sleep is hardly a good use of your time.’

He leaned forward, kissing her forehead and it was as if the gentle force of his kiss pushed her head back. She let herself fall onto the softness of her pillow.

He leaned in and whispered in her ear. ‘Why don't you let me decide that? I’m exactly where I want to be.’

With those words of reassurance, Linda Bennett let her eyes close as she sighed loudly. Neal kept his eyes glued to her face, watching as she began to relax. He’d read about half a page of an article on celebrity couples who were going through messy divorces when he heard the unmistakable sound of soft snoring. He put down the article and let his eyes linger on her weathered face.

How long did she have left? Days? Weeks? Months? Certainly not years. He thought of all the things he wouldn’t be able to share with her: Hope’s upcoming wedding to Cameron, Caitlin’s admission into university, Liam’s graduation from Syracuse, the eventual birth of her great grandchildren. 

Watching your parents prepare to leave this earth led to some disturbing realizations, not the least of which was the sudden awareness that your generation was up next. You and your contemporaries were now the senior members of the family, the ones who would become grandparents, who would grow old, perhaps suffer from failing health and in no time, have to face the prospect of leaving it all behind. 

He had a strange, unprompted musing as he thought of Sara: he hoped he would be the first to go. He couldn’t imagine carrying on without her by his side. Getting up in the morning, trying to find joy in every little thing he’d been sharing for more than two decades with the woman he loved. Of course the kids would still be around and someday, maybe even grandkids but none of it would have nearly as much meaning without Sara there to share it all with him.

And yet… if he went first, Sara would be left alone, an equally disturbing scenario. 

Unless she fell in love again. His mind wandered to Randall Piper. Not that he’d begrudge her moving on… not exactly. As the old cliché went, he’d want Sara to be happy, no matter what. But he had to admit that the thought of her with someone else was rather unsettling, especially someone like Randall Piper who had made such a success of his life. The man could buy her anything her heart desired, things Neal could only dream of giving her - at least legally. And he’d closed that door over twenty years before.

He thought of George Bailey from ‘It’s a Wonderful Life’ and his promise to lasso the moon for his beloved Mary. That’s kind of what he’d like to do for Sara: give her the moon… and the stars if she wanted them. 

Not that Neal was a pauper. Financially, they’d done all right. When June died, she’d left him a small fortune and yet, Sara had encouraged him to follow his heart and suddenly diamonds and yearly trips to Europe had paled in comparison to the impact he could make by setting up a school of art for disadvantaged youth. They had everything they needed: a perfectly lovely home where they’d raised their beautiful kids, where they’d welcomed friends over the years, where they’d made plans for the future, where they’d laughed and cried. They might not be independently wealthy but Neal could certainly afford to buy his wife something nice whenever her birthday or their anniversary rolled around, take her out to dinner, a night on the town. More importantly, they’d always managed to give their kids everything they needed - if not everything they wanted. 

But he wished he could have given Sara so much more… diamonds, emeralds, expensive art, a house in the Hamptons. 

One day, a lifetime ago, he’d offered her all that and more at his kitchen table at June’s place, back when he and Mozzie had been sitting on Vincent Adler’s treasure. She’d turned him down then and he knew for a fact she would turn him down again today if she had the chance. But that was because the stolen art was… well, stolen. What if he could offer her all that legitimately. 

Like Randall Piper could.

WCWCWC

Mozzie hadn’t wanted to admit it to Neal on the phone but he knew the place he was casing all too well. Clive’s: a watering hole on Amsterdam Street in a shoddy neighbourhood in Harlem. To his dismay, Mozzie knew way too many places just like this one, places like Joe’s Bar and Grill, The Tipsy Cow and Watson’s Watering Hole, just to name a few. Let’s face it, bars and pubs were where Mozzie did most of his business, as tame as it was these days. Gone were the glory days with Neal Caffrey, master forger and cat burglar extraordinaire as his partner in crime. These days, anytime Neal went back to those previously lucrative activities, it was because Peter or Jones had enlisted his help on a case. 

Back in their heyday, Mozzie had been the brains behind the operation and Neal was the undisputed front man. Without a partner to rely on, Mozzie had been reduced to making the odd quick and dirty deal, just basically trying to keep his reputation intact. He’d reverted to selling out his former associates on more occasions than he cared to remember - notably while working with Neal’s wife in her attempts to retrieve some of the stolen stuff that was out there floating around in never-never land. He made a reasonable amount of money outing his previous cohorts but he wasn't proud of that fact. Luckily, he'd acquired a fair bit of equity and he still had five safe houses where he could successfully evade law enforcement and keep most of his treasures hidden.

Mozzie ordered a scotch and settled in at the end of the bar, the spot that afforded him the best view of the place - from the front door of the establishment all the way to the very back where a few tables lay scattered with mismatched, wobbly chairs. Neal had texted him a photograph of Jesse - which he’d craftily taken at home as the young man stood with his arm around Caitlin, both staring back with huge unsuspecting smiles.   
The place was busy - as most of these joints were late in the afternoon. The regulars who’d been there since early afternoon were hanging in for just one more, or two or three and those who worked in the neighbourhood, mostly men, were popping in for a quick one on the way home to the old ball and chain.

The average age of the clientele at this particular establishment was 41.7 years Mozzie estimated with a calculated examination of his surroundings. It was a strange pastime he’d developed over the years whenever he sat alone, nursing a shot of bourbon or a scotch on ice in one of the dozen or so places he frequented. He liked to think he was pretty close to the mark although no proof had been rendered on the estimation - still, it passed the time along with guessing who was wearing a rug and who was there for illicit purposes.

Out in the real world, wine was definitely Mozzie’s go-to drink but he rarely ordered it while he was sitting in one of these watering holes; he thought it made him look weak and spineless. Everybody knew that hard liquor was a confidence man’s drink and after all, he had an image to project - and protect. 

He kept his eye on the door, observing as newcomers passed the threshold and waiting for Jesse Davis to make his appearance. He’d spotted a fence he knew sitting alone in a booth by the window: Frankie Catalano or Frankie the Freeloader as he was known in these parts. The guy had a reputation for always skimming off the top - a dishonourable practice even in the criminal world they lived in. Mozzie’s gut was telling him the man was there to meet Jesse - just a feeling really but he silently bet himself his safe house in Pennsylvania and took another sip of his drink. He held his breath as he spotted Jesse step into the bar and look around. Without much hesitation, he made his way to the booth where Frankie was ensconced, sipping a beer - something Mozzie would never stoop to doing in pubic - or even in private for that matter.

Jesse took a seat and Mozzie exhaled. Good! He wouldn't have to give up any of his fancy homes - at least not today.

He couldn't hear what was being said unless he got up and moved a little closer. That would look way too conspicuous so he decided to lean on one of his many other skills: lip reading. He leaned forward and zeroed in on Frankie’s lips as the man spoke, hoping to ferret out the intel he’d been tasked with getting. 

WCWCWC

Liam was still second guessing his decision not to go out for a beer with the rest of the team as he lumbered down the hallway towards his dorm room. He was exhausted from the team’s trip to North Carolina - to say nothing of the emotional events of that afternoon. The breakup with Todd had been awkward and difficult but it was finally behind him. Now, he could concentrate on his studies and his commitment to the Orange. He’d be home again by Easter and with any luck, maybe he could get in touch with Cody, see if he wanted to get together, go for coffee, catch up.

The minute he put the key in the door, he got a whiff of Todd’s familiar scent and he almost turned around and ran the other way but, hey… this was his room after all. He opened the door, finding the room dark and he flipped on the light, immediately regretting it.

In his bed, already asleep, lay Todd Greenway, naked - at least from the waist up.

‘Great!’ Liam muttered under his breath.

He hesitated for a moment, wondering if he should call Josh for back-up but deciding in that same moment that an SOS would be totally childish and ridiculous. After all, Todd couldn't make him do anything he didn't want to do. He stood in the doorway, arms crossed in defiance and watched as the man stirred now that the room was flooded with light. Getting too close to Todd was probably unadvisable considering the effect the man had on Liam’s libido so instead, he called out to him from where he stood, feet firmly planted on the ground. 

‘Todd, what the hell?’

The young man sat up, his hair disheveled, his pecs ripped and he gave Liam a crooked smile.

‘Hey’ he called out sleepily in that voice that made Liam’s man parts immediately take notice.

‘What are you doing here?’ Liam asked, trying his best to sound strong and decisive.

Todd’s smile widened and he pushed back the blankets, revealing the rest of his muscular frame - without a stitch of clothing.

Contrary to Liam’s voice, Todd spoke in a playful tone as he got to his feet. ‘Come on lover… we never really finished our conversation earlier.’

Liam hung on to the shred of dignity he could feel slipping away. ‘It was a breakup, Todd’ he said, his voice much more resolute than he actually felt.

Todd walked towards him and Liam’s eyes were drawn to his strong legs, his muscular torso, his strapping arms, his impressive privates. 

‘I’m serious’ he said - not sounding serious at all. His voice broke and he coughed, putting his hand up as if to stop the other man from coming any closer.

For all the good that did him. 

‘Come on Liam. At least we can say goodbye…properly’ Todd said in that deep register that always made Liam’s knees weaken. 

Todd continued bridging the gap between them, undeterred by Liam’s protestations.

No! No! No! No! No! No! He was NOT letting his junk overtake his brain. Not this time.

‘Stop it Todd!’ he shouted but the trembling in his voice gave him away.

It didn’t do much good and Todd continued until he stood directly in front of him, his manhood protruding proudly from his body as he got within inches of the other man.

He simply lay his hand on Liam’s arm and that was all it took. Liam was a goner.

WCWCWC

Neal had been waiting for Caitlin to retire for the night so he could finally have it out with Jesse Davis. Among other things, he needed to know what the man had found out about him - if anything - and ask him point blank what he planned to do with the information. Not that that was much of a mystery. If Jesse had gone snooping into Neal’s past, it was for one reason and one reason only: to lord it over him in exchange for something. The most likely threat was that Jesse intended to share the details of Neal’s previous life with Caitlin if Neal didn't give him a wide berth and let him stay at the house. Neal had already decided that if that was where this was headed, he would beat Jesse to the punch and come clean to Caitlin himself. There was no way this scumbag was going to drive a wedge between Neal and his foster daughter by creating a narrative that would only leave her confused and upset. 

Mozzie’s report from his secret mission had proven inconclusive although he had been able to ascertain that Jesse had met with scumbag Frankie the Freeloader and that he’d shown him some photographs on his phone - photographs Mozzie had regrettably not been close enough to see. Jesse obviously thought he had something worth fencing and Frankie had appeared to agree. He’d nodded and if Mozzie’s lip reading skills were up to snuff - which apparently they were not - the man’s response had been Howdy Doodie or perhaps Hokey pokey, he wasn't sure.

Neal had thanked his buddy for the limited intel. At the very least, it confirmed that Jesse was consorting with known criminals, in this case, a fence who specialized in jewelry and small pieces of art - at least, the last time Mozzie had checked. To Neal’s dismay, Jones still hadn't gotten back to him and Neal didn't want to hassle him; after all, Jones was doing him a solid by checking for him in the first place. He’d just have to be a little more patient.

Jesse and Caitlin had been joined at the hip ever since Jesse had returned from his mysterious little rendezvous in Harlem and Neal had gone up to bed, ostensibly to read while he waited for the coast to be clear. 

Apparently, he’d been more tired than he realized and when Sara came upstairs a little before eleven to let him know Caitlin was off to bed, he’d been dead to the world and she hadn't had the heart to wake him. She slipped the book from his relaxed hands and pulled off the reading glasses that were still perched on the tip of Neal’s nose. He let out a moan and let himself slip under the covers, practically comatose.

Sara chuckled at the sight of him. Oh, how the mighty had fallen, she reflected as she pulled the duvet up to his neck and slipped in beside him. She lay for a while with the light on, studying her husband’s face, the way his lips turned up just a little while he slept, like he was having a particularly pleasant dream, his features relaxed, his body serene - something she didn't see nearly often enough these days. 

She fell back on her pillow and reached for the light, her mind wandering to another handsome face: that of Randall Piper. He’d shown up unexpectedly to drop off a list of items from his townhouse - something that could easily have been done by e-mail, courier or any other number of ways. He’d strolled in, his charm and impressive physique instantly filling her office and he'd willingly accepted when Sara had offered him a cup of coffee. They’d chatted for about an hour, their attempts to keep to the subject at hand morphing into recollections of the good old days, something that had left Sara smiling as she reminisced. 

She gently lay her hand on Neal’s arm and in his sleep, he lifted his arm, inviting her to settle against him. She sighed. His arm around her shoulder left her feeling calm and reassured as it always did. He was strong, robust, solid, the man she could count on through thick and thin, through good times and bad, the man who was there for her when she was anxious or frightened, the man who made her laugh when she was sad, the man who lifted her spirits when things got tough, the father of her children, the thoughtful lover who always put her needs first.

He stirred and blinked. ‘Jesse…’ he murmured under his breath, barely conscious.

‘You can talk to him tomorrow’ she whispered back. ‘Go back to sleep, honey.’

Neal groaned in response; if Sara said it was so, it must be okay. She was always right. He sighed and squeezing her shoulder, he slipped back into blissful slumber.

TBC


	25. Chapter 25

‘This is all wrong’ Liam stated, his voice even.

The two men lay, side by side, bodies still intertwined following a quick and dirty interlude between the sheets.

Todd scoffed. ‘But did it feel good?’ 

‘That’s not the point, Todd. Feeling good doesn’t make it right.’ 

Todd turned sideways, draping his leg over Liam’s body. ‘Why are you making this more complicated than it needs to be?’

Liam wriggled out from under him and threw off the sheet covering both of them. He got to his feet and began hunting for his boxers which had been thrown across the room along with the rest of his clothes. He checked the time. It had been less than thirty minutes since he’d stood, resolute, in the doorway to his room and now he was going to have to recite the whole breakup spiel all over again.

‘Nothing’s changed. I told you earlier how things have to be.’

Todd pushed himself up onto his elbow and watched Liam getting dressed. ‘Why though? Why do things have to be this way?’

Now that his libidinous impulses were no longer clouding his mind, Liam was coming to his senses, realizing the consequences of his latest lapse in judgement. Ever since he’d first met Todd Greenway, he’d known the man was persistent - hell, he’d come after him like gangbusters after they’d first met. The guy just couldn't or wouldn’t take no for an answer; why would their breakup be any different. 

‘Josh’ll be back any minute and you and I need to talk’ Liam said, pulling up his pants.

Todd stared back at him, his eyes bright and shiny as they always were after a robust lovemaking session. ‘Come on lover, you’re not going to tell me you didn't enjoy that.’

Liam ignored the question and continued getting dressed. He threw some of Todd’s clothes in his direction: boxers, shirt, jeans.

‘Get dressed’ he ordered. ‘We’re going for coffee.’

WCWCWC

Neal had been awake for about an hour when Sara finally stirred next to him. She felt his arm tighten around her waist.

‘You awake?’ she murmured.

‘Uh huh’ he replied.

She turned to face him in the early morning light. ‘How come?’

Neal flipped over onto his back and she settled in against him. ‘Just trying to get my head around a few things, plan my day.’

‘Is this about Jesse?’

‘After I get back from driving Hope and Cam to the train station, I’m going to confront him.’

‘What are you going to say?’ 

Neal sighed loudly. ‘I’m going to tell him that we know he faked the mugging and ask him again what he’s up to.’

‘Don’t you want to see if Jones found out anything first?’ she asked.

He felt her warm hand resting on his chest anchoring him and he placed his own on top as if to keep her from moving. 

‘Yeah…’ he muttered, his voice far away. ‘I’ll give him a call.’

Sara Ellis knew her husband pretty well and she could tell there was more to the story. She waited patiently for him to speak up.

His face grew tense and he turned to look at her. ‘But before I talk to Jesse, I need to sit down and have a heart to heart with Caitlin. I need to get it over with and tell her the truth.’

The ‘it’ Neal was referring to was no mystery to Sara. He’d mentioned his ambivalence about sharing his past with their foster daughter on several occasions since she’d come into their lives. There were arguments to be made on both sides of the issue but ultimately, he’d just never managed to work up the courage to tell Caitlin about the years he’d spent in federal prison - or the illegal actions that had led him there.

On the pro side, telling her might help bring them closer. Knowing Neal had gone through a rough time and had somehow made it through might help her gain insight into her own struggles and conclude that she could turn her life around despite her difficult beginnings. The flip side - and the argument that had always won out - was Neal’s fear that she might lose respect for him and that somehow he would lose the moral high ground. 

‘I don’t think I have a choice anymore’ he murmured. ‘He’s obviously found out about my past and if I let him take control of the narrative, there’s no telling how he’ll spin it.’

Sara nodded. She’d encouraged him to tell Caitlin the truth back when she’d first moved in but Neal had been afraid of losing credibility in her eyes - especially at a time when she needed a strong authoritarian figure.

‘Honey, she’ll be fine’ Sara said reassuringly. ‘She’s not a kid anymore and besides, she’ll understand. She’s no angel herself.’

‘That’s just it though. I don't want her to perceive this as permission to live the kind of life I was living when I was her age.’

Sara pushed herself up onto her elbow and let her other hand continue to linger across Neal’s chest. ‘That might have been a valid concern when she was sixteen and messed up but she’s a lot more… mature than she was. Except for her recent little flare-up, she’s been doing well… you said so yourself.’

Neal sighed again, the lines on his forehead growing deeper.

‘Look how worried you were about telling Hope and Liam’ Sara reminded him. ‘And that turned out just fine.’

It was true. For years, beginning even before Hope was born, he’d agonized about coming clean to his kids about his criminal past. In the end, it had been mortifying but, in both cases, he’d been relieved to finally have everything out in the open. And Sara was right, his relationship with his kids didn't appear to have suffered after they’d found out the truth about their dad.

‘But they were little and… it happened naturally.’

At the age of seven, Hope had discovered Neal’s GPS tracker at the back of their bedroom closet and in true Hope style she’d drilled him with questions about it. He’d explained as best he could that when he’d been younger, he’d done things that were illegal and that he’d gone to jail. He explained in general terms that her uncle Peter had arranged to have him released so he could help the FBI catch some bad guys and that the tracker was a condition of his release. 

At the time, Hope had been more interested in the anklet itself, how it worked, how it was worn and she’d even slipped it on her own ankle and dragged it around the bedroom while Neal watched. That had been the extent of her curiosity and she’d never mentioned it again… except for that time she’d gotten angry at her dad and had proceeded to throw his past in his face like any other defiant teenager might do. Neal had been crushed by her outburst but the two of them had managed to work things out. Hope had always insisted that her unwarranted hissy fit was the biggest regret of her life. 

Explaining things to Liam hadn’t been a picnic either. He’d been just shy of four years old when he’d gotten into a scuffle at preschool with another little boy who’d teased him about his daddy being a criminal who’d gone to jail. Liam had accused the other little guy of lying and had defended his beloved dad. Neal had been forced to explain things to his son in a language he could understand and Liam had barely batted an eye, equating Neal’s stint in jail to the time outs he sometimes had to endure at the hands of his parents when he misbehaved. 

Once everything had been out in the open, any questions the kids had had over the years had been answered on the spot, honestly and completely, until it had all faded into the background, inconsequential to their everyday lives and Hope and Liam’s unconditional love and admiration for their dad.

In both cases, breaking the news to his children had been less painful than the troublesome scenarios Neal had allowed himself to cultivate over the years.

Caitlin, however, was another story. She’d already had such a difficult childhood and adolescence and the last thing he wanted was for this news to push her over the edge and give her some justification for the outlandish behaviour she’d been exhibiting. He’d always told himself that was his main reason for holding back but in the back of his mind, he'd had less altruistic motivations. The truth was he didn't want to lose credibility in her eyes. He’d been her knight in shining armour, saving her from a life of malfeasance, taking her into his home, raising her as his own and giving her every bit as much as he’d given Hope and Liam. She was about to find out that their whole relationship was built on a lie. What would her reaction be? Would she think less of him? 

‘Why don’t we tell her together?’ Sara murmured pulling him out of his thoughts.

He looked down at her fondly, bringing his arm around her shoulder and resting his lips on her forehead. ‘Thanks babe… but this is something I need to do by myself. You’re not the one who got herself arrested for bond forgery and served four years in a federal penitentiary.’

‘Neal, that happened a long time ago and it doesn't define who you are as a person. And besides, we’re in this together.’

Neal shook his head sadly. Here he was, almost three decades later, still haunted by the bad decisions he'd made in his youth. Somedays, he thought the whole ugly mess would never end. He’d worked so hard to be a good role model for his kids but he realized that he could never erase what he'd done. Ever. He’d be paying for it in one way or another for the rest of his life.

He smiled, albeit a sad smile. ‘I love you for offering Repo but I’ll be fine. Just… just promise you’ll be here for me when it’s all over and done with.’

Sara felt her throat tighten. ‘Always and forever, Caffrey.’

WCWCWC

When Liam woke the next morning, it was to the sound of Josh Monteith singing in the shower. For a tall, skinny black kid, the guy had an amazing set of lungs and Liam lay there for a minute taking it all in and letting the memories of the previous night wash over him. 

Josh had been sound asleep when he’d finally made it back to their room the night before. After their romp in the sheets, Liam and Todd had gone out to a little roadhouse off campus for coffee. Liam had managed to stay focussed and he’d spent the better part of two hours telling Todd Greenway in no uncertain terms that they were done and that their little roll in the hay was the last time they would ever be together. 

He’d apologized profusely - as only Liam could - for toying with the man’s emotions and he’d reiterated that he'd never meant to hurt him. They held hands and reminisced about the fun times they had during their short courtship and Liam thanked him again for being there for him during his first few months away from home. He explained how he’d agonized about the decision to break up, how he needed to concentrate his energy and attention on school and basketball and he reassured Todd that, at least for the time being, his decision had nothing to do with Cody Miller.

When they’d parted ways, it was well past midnight and Liam was confident Todd had finally gotten the message. Liam set some clear ground rules: he asked Todd not to come to his room uninvited, not to show up at his basketball practices and he apologized again for putting him through a break-up, not just once but twice. If Todd could respect Liam’s wishes, Liam agreed they could remain friends - as much as exes can be friends once the hurting has subsided. 

Liam had walked Todd to his dorm on the other side of campus and the two men had hugged before finally parting ways. He hadn't even felt the bitter cold nipping at his extremities as he’d trudged back to Booth Hall in the dark and once there, he'd slipped into a guilt-free slumber for the first time in several weeks. 

Liam was startled by the sound of the water being turned off, the pipes banging loudly as they always did. The singing continued for a few seconds then Josh appeared in the doorway to the bathroom, a towel around his waist and dripping water all over the floor. 

‘So, where did you disappear to last night?’ he asked. ‘I thought you were too tired to come out for a drink with the rest of us.’

Liam sat up on the edge of his bed, his eyes bleary; it was time to come clean about what had happened after he and Josh had parted ways. After all the time and energy his roomie had invested in coaching him through the breakup, he was embarrassed to tell him what had happened. 

‘I was… but…’

Josh picked up on the hesitation and gave his head a firm shake, sending droplets of water flying in Liam’s direction. 

‘No! Tell me you didn’t…’ he began as he saw the telltale signs of unease on Liam’s face. ‘You slept with him again, didn't you?’ 

His tone was accusatory - almost like a jilted lover - and Liam looked down at his feet, avoiding his roomie’s probing glare. He stood, scratched his head, his sandy coloured hair sticking up unnaturally and he made his way over to the small coffee maker on the sideboard, fiddling with it. He wasn't proud of the fact that he’d given in to his baser instincts mere hours after breaking up with Todd. He had barely put up a fight.

Seeing that look of disappointment on Josh’s face was akin to facing himself in the mirror and admitting to himself just how weak he’d been. 

‘Caffrey, what the hell’s wrong with you?’ Josh asked, arms up in the air in a sign of defeat.

‘Do you want some coffee?’ Liam asked in an attempt at deflection. He poked around absentmindedly, filling the pot with water and checking the mini-fridge for milk.

Josh wandered over to his bed where his clothes lay and he let the towel drop on the floor, grabbing for a pair of underwear and slipping them on. 

‘You know I just don’t get it, Liam. It took you forever to make up your mind and then it took everything for you to finally go through with it. And then you go and step right back into the pile of shit you just got yourself out of.’

‘He was in my bed when I got back to the room last night’ Liam said petulantly as if that was reason enough to set reason aside and act so impulsively.

Josh shook his head and rolled his eyes. ‘Oh, he was in your bed when you got back to the room’ he repeated in a whiny voice. ‘Well, that explains everything!’

Liam looked away; he knew Josh was right. It had been foolish of him to give in to his hormone fuelled body when it had been so painful to break up with Todd in the first place.

‘Afterwards… we went out for coffee and I told him we were done.’ 

‘Whatever!’ Josh exclaimed, disbelieving. He pulled on a shirt and grabbed for his jeans.

Liam picked up a key chain from the desk and dangled it in front of his roomie. ‘I got my room key back.’

Josh seemed to soften. ‘I guess that’s something.’

‘He has this effect on me, I can’t explain it’ Liam admitted. ‘You know how you get when Allie Jenkins comes to practice… you trip over your own two feet.’

Josh seemed to take Liam’s last comment into consideration. It was true that when the pretty girl from his sociology class dropped by the gym to watch them practice, he suddenly developed two left feet.

Liam could see Josh’s mood changing. ‘Anyway, I think I finally got it out of my system’ he said as he lifted up a coffee cup in invitation. 

Whereas one minute earlier, Josh had seemed ready to head out, he let his shoulders drop and sat down at the small table, his lanky legs tucked under the chair. 

‘Fine’ he said with a shrug. ‘I’ll have some coffee.’

Liam smiled at him, that shy, disarming Caffrey smile of his.

‘So’ Josh said, taking the cup from his roomie’s hand. ‘Tell me everything that happened.’

WCWCWC

‘You know you didn't have to do this, Dad’ Hope said as she sat in the back seat of the car alongside Cameron. ‘We could have taken an Uber.’

Neal shrugged. ‘And miss spending an hour and a half stuck in traffic with my beautiful daughter and her handsome fiancé?’ he said in jest.

‘You can flatter us all you want, Dad’ she said with a mischievous smile. ‘We’re still not going to tell you anything about the wedding until it’s time.’

He gave her a put upon pout and turned his attention to his future son-in-law. ‘So, are your folks excited about your visit?’

‘My mom’s over the moon. She’s been cooking and cleaning and just generally driving my dad crazy.’

He looked over at Hope and reached for her hand, squeezing it. ‘We’re going to have a great time, right sweetie?’

She nodded but Neal picked up a certain reluctance in her gaze. The prospect of staying with the Armstrongs had her feeling uneasy. The life Cam’s family lived was pretty well the polar opposite of the way she and her brother had been raised in a big metropolitan city.

‘So you’ll let us know…’ Neal said, leaving the rest of the question unspoken.

‘Just be patient, Daddy. You and Mom are right up there at the top of our list.’

Traffic was a bitch and the young couple insisted on getting out two blocks from the train station. Hope leaned over to kiss her dad goodbye and followed Cam out of the car. Neal watched fondly as they walked away, hand in hand, carrying their backpacks and looking like the young, carefree couple they were. He sighed and set his sights on making his way back to White Plains and Mel’s Diner where he’d made a date with Caitlin for lunch. Jesse was out, ostensibly looking for work, and there would never be a better time to share his findings with her and to finally get things off his chest.

His early morning call to Clinton Jones had confirmed Neal’s earlier suspicions. Jesse Davis was a two-bit hustler with a long record of misdemeanours in four states. His rap sheet included a couple of arrests for assault, shoplifting, petty theft, two drug charges as well as an arrest for credit card fraud. He’d served time both in Florida and in Texas over the past twelve or so years. This information didn't shed much light on what he was doing in New York but it was a safe bet he was up to no good.

The news of her brother’s lack of rectitude might be difficult for Caitlin to hear and Neal braced himself, aware he needed to tread lightly. His intention wasn't to demolish him in her eyes but she had a right to know her brother was lying to her, to all of them. 

More than anything else though, Neal was worried about Caitlin’s reaction to the news about his own past. Jesse Davis might be in their lives in passing but his relationship with his foster daughter would endure long after the young man disappeared in a cloud of dust. The most important thing was to make sure their relationship survived this hiccup so they could come out the other side with their connection intact. 

He got to Mel’s Diner before she did and settled at his usual booth to wait. Sonia, their regular waitress, brought over some coffee and Neal did his best to chat her up while he kept one eye out the window to see if Caitlin was coming up the road. Before long, he noticed her colourful hat bopping along the sidewalk - the one they always teased her about. She mostly wore it to work at the daycare; the kids loved how bright and multicoloured it was. 

He watched her make her way to the door and point herself towards the table where he was waiting with a nice hot cup of coffee for her.

‘Hey Mr. C’ she called out.

‘Hey’ Neal said in return, getting to his feet and leaning down to kiss her cheek.

It was a rare occasion when they got to spend time alone together - except for the hours they spent sharing Neal’s studio in the basement. Meals out were usually a family affair and she’d been pleased when Neal suggested they meet up - although she had been a little mystified by the invitation. 

Neal waited until they’d ordered their food before tackling the thorny subject he needed to discuss with her. Sonia filled their coffee cups one last time and walked away with their orders, leaving them to chat. 

‘Caitlin, I found out some stuff about Jesse that I think you should know about.’

‘What do you mean you found out? Have you been spying on him?’

Neal could instantly feel her defensiveness; blood ran pretty thick after all. Except for her no-good mother, Jesse was her only living relative; it was normal that she would want to protect her relationship with him. 

‘It doesn't matter how I know. The point is… ’ Neal said, trying not to get sidetracked. ‘…I found a loaded gun in his bag and some narcotics.’

Caitlin stared into his eyes, her own gaze hardening.

‘So?’ she said, her voice meek. ‘A lot of people carry guns.’

‘Honey, you know how I feel about guns in the house. Bibi and Chloe are over at our place all the time. What would happen if they came across a loaded gun?’ he asked, his voice growing louder.

He glanced around the restaurant making sure he wasn't attracting any attention.

‘Caitlin, I’m not telling you this to hurt you’ he said, hesitating. ‘Jesse’s been lying to you, he’s been lying to all of us. The night before last when you came home and he had those bruises, I snooped around.’

She stared back in disbelief.

‘His wallet was in his bag and he had over eight hundred bucks in it.’

She shrugged.

‘Honey, he didn't get mugged. He lied.’

‘That’s not true. He was covered in bruises, you saw it yourself.’

Neal nodded. ‘I know… he was roughed up but that doesn't mean he was mugged.’

Caitlin’s face grew dark. ‘I don’t believe you.’

Neal had hoped it wouldn't come to this. He pulled out his phone and showed her the photographs he'd taken in the powder room two nights earlier - the definitive proof that her brother had deceived her. 

She stared down at the pictures on Neal’s phone and shook her head from side to side.

‘Why are you telling me this?’ she asked, her voice trembling.

‘Honey, Jesse’s not who he says he is and I don’t think he came here just to see you. I talked to Clinton today and he did some checking for me.’

Caitlin’s eyes grew and he could see tears forming. ‘Why would you do something like that? Why would you spy on him?’ 

Neal steadied his breathing. This wasn't going quite as he'd hoped. He waited a moment to give her time to assimilate what he’d just told her. 

Curiosity got the best of her. ‘What… what did Clinton say?’

‘Jesse’s been in trouble with the law before’ Neal stated.

‘I know… he’s no angel’ she replied, her voice shaky.  
Neal felt like he was spinning his tires; maybe it was time to use a different tactic. ‘Why do you think he pretended to get mugged?’

Caitlin’s bright blue eyes swam in unshed tears. ‘I don’t know…’

‘I don’t either. But I’m going to talk to him… I’m going to confront him, find out why.’

A tear spilled out onto her cheek and Caitlin reached up with the back of her hand to wipe it off.

‘I want to be there. Maybe there’s a perfectly good explanation.’

Neal nodded. ‘You can if you want. But you don't have to. Do you trust me?’

He almost choked on the words; when he finished telling her what he needed her to know she might never trust him again.

She nodded in silence.   
Neal’s hand reached out to touch hers. ‘Caitlin, Sara and I love you very much and we want you to be happy.’

‘I know’ she stammered. ‘I love you guys too.’

‘I know it can’t be easy to be hearing this stuff about your brother but I don't want him messing with you, getting you wrapped up in his shenanigans somehow.’

Caitlin was grabbing for her coat. ‘Well, let’s go. Right now. See if we can clear this up.’

Neal’s held her back. His face grew serious. ‘Wait, wait, sit down. There’s something else I need to talk to you about.’

The intensity in his eyes stopped her dead in her tracks. ‘What is it? Are you sick? Is it Sara?’

Neal smiled. ‘No, no. We’re both fine. It’s something else. Something that happened a long time ago.’

She dropped her coat and settled back in the booth, waiting for him to continue.

‘What is it?’

Neal took a couple of steadying breaths. He'd been dreading this moment ever since he'd decided he had no choice but to tell her about his past.

‘Peter and I used to work together’ he said, easing into the subject.

‘Yeah, you worked with him at the FBI, helping him with forgeries and stuff, right?’

Neal nodded. ‘Yeah.’ His voice was barely more than a whisper. ‘What I’ve never told you is how I came to work at the FBI.’

This was infinitely more difficult than he’d imagined. She could react in so many different ways: with warmth and understanding, fierce anger, bitter disappointment. He let out a shaky breath.

‘I was on work release’ he stated, his voice flat.

‘Release… from where?’

‘From prison.’

‘What?’

‘Honey, I did a little over four years at Sing Sing.’

‘Sing Sing? You mean that federal penitentiary?’

Neal nodded and for the first time, he let his eyes drop into his lap, noticing he was wringing his hands.

‘When I was younger, in my twenties, I was arrested for bond forgery.’

‘What?’ she said again with a nervous laugh. ‘You’re kidding, right?’

‘No’ he replied soberly. ‘I’m not. Peter was the one who arrested me and… I escaped from prison when I had three months left on my sentence.’

‘This is crazy.’

‘I was dragged back to jail but I managed to negotiate a deal with the Bureau to help them with some cases in exchange for a reduced sentence. I was released and put on an electronic monitoring device until my sentence was up. Peter was my handler.’

Caitlin stared ahead in disbelief. ‘Your handler? Like in those movies with criminals?’

Neal just nodded.

‘Does Sara know?’ she demanded, her tone accusing.

‘Yeah, of course. I was still on the anklet when we got married.’

‘So… you’re a criminal?’ she said, as she finally put the pieces together. ‘A common thief?’

The words cut through Neal like a knife. He hadn't expected her to react this way; who was he kidding, this reaction was exactly what he'd feared.

Her eyes hardened. ‘You’ve been acting all high and mighty, all this time. Pretending to be a good guy. Saving all those kids at the art school.’

‘I’m not pretending Caitlin. All this happened a long time ago. And I paid my debt to society.’

She shook her head and laughed sardonically. ‘This is rich’ she scoffed. ‘You’re on Jesse’s case about a few petty crimes and you… you’re some sort of master forger.’

Neal sat in silence. He couldn't deny that what she was saying was true; it was all true - and his crimes had been much worse than he was now admitting to.

‘Why are you telling me this now?’

‘Jesse… Jesse found out somehow and he threatened to tell you if I didn't keep quiet about what he was doing. I didn't want you hearing it from him.’

Caitlin frowned; the information was coming at a faster clip than she could process. 

‘Do Hope and Liam know?’

Neal nodded.

‘So basically everybody in the family knows but me’ she stated. He could see the hurt in her eyes. ‘Why didn't you tell me?’

‘Honey, it happened a long time ago and it has nothing to do with our lives today.’

‘You didn't trust me?’

‘It wasn't my proudest moment. I know you’ve always had a lot of questions about me and my mom and I was never able to tell you the whole story of how we became estranged.’

‘So now it’s Grandma’s fault?’ she asked sarcastically. ‘I suppose she knows too?’

Neal’s eyes drifted down to stare at his cup of coffee. ‘Yes’ he mumbled.

Caitlin was on her feet, grabbing for her coat.

‘Caitlin, wait’ Neal attempted but she was having none of it.

She stared at him, her voice shrill. ‘You’re a fraud’ she declared. ‘And everybody knew but me.’

His instinct was to hold her back, try to make her see sense but he thought better of it. She needed some time to digest all this and the best he could do for the time being was give her a little space. She stormed towards the door with only one arm in her coat and Neal watched her from the window as she walked away without turning back.

Neal’s attention was diverted by Sonia, standing over him with two large plates of food. 

‘Everything okay Mr. Caffrey’ the woman asked.

She set the food down and held up her pot of coffee, silently asking if he wanted a refill. Neal shook his head in silence. She was just walking away when he called out to her.

‘You know what, Sonia. Why don’t you bring me a scotch? A double.’

TBC


	26. Chapter 26

Every single event in Hope Ellis-Caffrey’s life fell into one of two categories: before the accident or after the accident. 

Everything that had occurred prior to her twentieth birthday had been pretty well picture perfect: a wonderful, carefree childhood with devoted parents, a loving brother, success at school, caring friends, recognition as an up and coming artist and of course, her very own Prince Charming.

But the events of March 28th almost four years earlier had knocked her whole world off its axis and had left her broken and damaged, shaking her near perfect existence and leaving her life in shambles. It had taken her a long time to come to terms with the events of that night but with a little perspective, Hope now realized she still had devoted parents, a loving brother, caring friends and most importantly her very own Prince Charming - but now everything was happening through the lens of physical pain and suffering and the knowledge that her wonderful life could change in the blink of an eye. 

The main casualty that night had been her budding career as an artist, something she looked back on as if it had happened to someone else - as one tended to perceive things after a major trauma. Her dad had nurtured her blossoming talent for years, watching her come into her own and envying the innocence that her fresh outlook on life brought to her art. But that innocence had vanished abruptly and irrevocably on that fateful night and had been replaced with anguish and suffering, leaving her to struggle to find joy and wonderment again.

Oh, Hope still painted. And after she’d recovered physically, she’d returned to perfecting her technique but much of the joy apparent in her ‘pre-accident’ work was MIA and had been replaced by a darker, more subdued style. Some might even say it was more mature, more erudite but the artist herself missed the carefree and lighthearted style of years past and longed to recapture the innocence of her earlier efforts. 

On bad days, she still brooded about the missed opportunity of getting her degree from Carnegie Mellon University. Sadly, the year she’d spent at CMU had been much too brief and with hindsight, she realized she hadn't fully appreciated her good fortune at the time. Now, she’d give just about anything to go back and have the chance to perfect her skills surrounded by likewise minded colleagues and knowledgeable mentors. Of course, she still had the best mentor of all: her dad. He’d shepherded her through her long, painful recovery, encouraging her awkward first attempts to paint again, trying to give her honest yet supportive feedback and urging her not to give up. No one could deny that she still had success at the gallery. Her stuff was selling just as well as it always had but the themes of her paintings had changed from hopeful and optimistic to dark and morose and although he’d never admitted it to her, Neal feared his daughter might never regain the joie de vivre she’d left behind that night. 

She sat back in her seat on the train, looking out the window and recalling the last time she’d ridden on Amtrak. It was on a trip home from university during that one and only year she’d lived in Pittsburgh. She recalled the excitement she’d felt coming home for study week, back to her family, back to Cameron and to all her friends. She’d been practically pulsating with excitement as she’d looked out at the barren fields, covered in snow. It had been just days before her birthday and she’d been excited about the prospect of spending a week at home. Little had she known at the time that her short stint as a student of the fine arts program at CMU was about to come to an abrupt and irrevocable end.

‘They didn't have any Mars bars so I got you a Three Musketeers’ Cameron’s voice called out, pulling her away from her brooding thoughts.

‘Great, thanks’ she said, pasting on a smile.

He settled back into his seat next to her and took her hand, perceiving a change in her mood.

‘You all right, sweetie?’ he asked.

‘I was just remembering the last time I took the train’ she admitted sadly.

He brought her hand up to his lips and deposited a gentle kiss on her knuckles. He had the good sense to just sit there quietly. He’d learned over the years that trying to ‘cheer her up’ just wasn't what Hope needed whenever she got a little morose. 

‘Do you think I’ll ever go back and finish my degree?’ she asked wistfully.

‘You can if you want to’ he said reassuringly. ‘We can live anywhere we want after we’re married.’

She looked up into his eyes, those kind, warm eyes that were a window into this wonderful man’s soul. ‘You’d do that for me? Leave New York?’

‘I’m in New York because you’re in New York, babe’ he said with a loving smile. ‘Home is wherever you are.’

She felt emotion rising in her chest and she swallowed back the tears welling up in her eyes. ‘I feel the same way about you, Cam.’

He lifted his phone and showed her the latest text from Bonnie Armstrong. ‘Well, you get to put your money where your mouth is - at least for the next few days. Mom wants to know if you prefer apple or cherry pie.’

Hope smiled, this time with sincerity. They were about to be coddled to death - if that was possible. 

‘It’s going to be like this the whole time we’re there, isn't it?’ she asked.

Cam chuckled. ‘You have no idea!’

WCWCWC

Neal had been staring at the glass of amber liquid for close to five minutes when Sonia reappeared.

‘Is she coming back?’ she asked as she looked down at the two untouched plates of food.

Neal snapped back to reality, looking up at the waitress and giving her one of his phoney Caffrey smiles. 

‘Naw, she had to leave’ he lied. ‘You can take it away, I’ve decided I’m not hungry after all.’

Sonia shrugged and removed the two plates of food, leaving Neal to stare at the glass of scotch which sat there, taunting him. There had been very few instances over the past four years when he’d been tempted to have a drink. As a matter of fact, he’d recently felt strong enough to wean himself off his weekly support group meetings and he hadn't met with his counsellor in almost eighteen months. Of course, Sara’s unyielding support had been a huge part of his recovery; she’d been loving and supportive yet she’d never once badgered him about any urges he might be having. In exchange, he’d been forthcoming about his feelings, confiding in her whenever he felt the pressure was beginning to get to him. He’d been feeling practically invincible as of late and yet, here he was facing off with a double shot of whiskey - and feeling like he was on the losing end of the battle.

Neal picked up the glass and watched the liquid swirl as he moved it in his hands. He brought it up to his nose and inhaled deeply before setting it back down again. He thought of the promise he’d made to Sara - to talk to her before he caved in and had a drink. Would it be so terrible to have just one? She would never need to know and it might help take the edge off those feelings of guilt and shame he’d been having since Caitlin had blown up at him.

Back in his conman days, he never gave a second thought to who he might be hurting or who might be suffering collateral damage from one of his little schemes. As long as he got what he was after, none of it mattered. He’d convinced himself that people wanted to believe him and that he wasn't really hurting anyone. But deep down, he knew better. Nowadays, the thought of hurting someone he loved was practically unbearable and he knew Caitlin had been crushed by what she perceived to be hypocrisy on his part. But mostly, he knew she was hurt to think he hadn't trusted her enough to tell her about his life all those years ago.

Most days he carried on with his busy life, having made peace with his past. His life nowadays was full of joy and love and the knowledge that he was making a difference in the lives of kids just like Caitlin. Sara’s unfailing support, the love and respect of his kids, his friendship with Peter, his relationships with everyone at the school and at the gallery… all were confirmation that he was an honest, respectable man, motivated by selflessness and a genuine caring for others. With therapy and the support of his loved ones, he’d let go of any lingering self-loathing and he’d learned that he’d always been that honourable man; he’d just been too damaged to see it.

Why then did this recent incident have him reeling and putting all that into question? To be honest, there was a whole lot more happening than this latest little skirmish with Caitlin. He’d been on edge for weeks about his mom’s health, his own inability to bring his blood pressure under control, his constant worries about the kids and Sara’s seeming infatuation with her old ex-boyfriend. Add to that his concern for Caitlin’s future and the sudden appearance of Jesse Davis and you had a volatile mix of anxiety and apprehension. The cherry on top was his inability to make love to his wife - something that usually served to keep him grounded and content. 

He picked up the glass once more and stared at it as his countless discussions with Marion Birch and Jim McDougall came flooding back. His descent into alcohol abuse had stemmed from his inability to deal with feelings of guilt over Hope’s accident and he’d learned through years of therapy to control those feelings of despair. The temporary release he might feel from taking a sip would come at a very high price - the potential to lose all those he held so dear. 

It was a price he was unwilling to pay. 

He grabbed for his phone with one hand and pushed the glass away with the back of the other.

‘Peter’ he said, his voice shaking. ‘Can you meet me at the coffee shop in forty-five minutes?’

WCWCWC

Fred Armstrong stood in the middle of the train station in Watertown, New York dressed in a gingham shirt and denim coveralls. He looked around at what he liked to call ‘the city folk’ around him and felt somewhat out of place. Truth was, he came to town to purchase supplies, run errands and have the odd meeting with vendors but he was much more at home on the old homestead than he was roaming the city streets. He had spent every single one of his sixty-three years on the Armstrong family farm. It had been passed down from his grandfather Ernest Armstrong to his own dad and upon his father’s passing, thirty one years earlier, to him. 

It had been the same year he’d married Bonnie Gentry, mere months after his dad passed away following a short but brutal battle with liver cancer. Fred had been working on the farm his whole life and of the three Armstrong siblings, he’d been the only one to shown any interest in farming. His sister Jo Beth had studied social work in Ithaca and had settled there with her husband and brood of three boys and two dogs. And his brother Bernie, the intellectual one of the trio, had settled on a career as a chartered accountant and had recently retired out in Wyoming with his wife Jolene.

The early years at the head of the Armstrong clan were a blur for both Fred and Bonnie as the kids arrived one after the other: Cameron, followed by Becky, Owen, Rhonda, Lucy and finally the runt of the litter, Joseph - an oops baby who was fifteen years Cam’s junior. All the kids had helped out with the farming chores over the years but it had been clear from the start that Cameron was a creative type who enjoyed poetry, was skilled in the arts and didn't have a speck of interest in working on the farm. When he’d shown an interest and some talent for drawing and painting, Bonnie and Fred had worked hard to make his dream of studying at NYU a reality. 

Fred had made peace with the fact Cam wouldn't be inheriting the farm and had turned his attention to the girls, particularly Becky who at the age of twenty-three was showing a great deal of interest and affinity for the business side of farming. It had taken some realignment of his long-held beliefs, considering he tended towards more traditional values, but Fred had begun to accept that a woman could run a busy, successful farm business just as well as any lad.

Truth was, he missed having his eldest son around. He’d never been the sentimental type but every Sunday when Bonnie called New York to check on Cam, Fred would pipe up and find some excuse to say something to his son from across the miles: someone he'd run into had been asking about him, did he catch the Giants game against the Patriots or simply, ‘we got ten inches of snow this week, how much did you get in the big city?’ His wife always teased him about his eagerness to get on the phone, considering he’d always had a severe allergy to the damn thing, never in their married life having picked up a ringing phone. But when it came to hearing his son’s voice, Fred Armstrong seemed to set aside his long-standing aversion. 

Fred’s eyes swept the station, not that he recognized a single soul. Only one train was scheduled to arrive within the next hour: the daily from New York City. Cam was bringing along his sweetheart, well his fiancée actually, a young woman Fred had only met once - very briefly. She seemed sweet and kind and it was obvious from the look in his eldest son’s eyes that Cameron worshipped the ground she walked on. He’d spent but a few hours in her presence the previous summer when she and Cam had spent one night at the farm on their way to Montreal but his impression of her had been favourable - plus Cameron had always had good taste in all things. 

Through the station’s window, he saw the lights on the track start to flash, followed by a train whistle and the faint sound of the engine growing louder. He spotted the young couple immediately as they stepped off the platform, eyes searching for their ride.

‘Cam! Over here!’ the man called out.

WCWCWC

Sara spotted Caitlin through the glass wall of her office even before her assistant could announce her arrival. In all the years the young woman had been in their lives, Sara couldn't remember a single time her foster daughter had come down to Sterling Bosch. She stood and made her way to the door, opening it wide and standing there.

‘Caitlin!’ she said. ‘What’s wrong? What are you doing here?’

Something obviously was. The young woman’s face was blotchy and red, her eyes puffy - obvious signs that she’d been crying. Either she’d had a confrontation with her visiting brother or she and Neal had finally had their little heart to heart.

Wanda looked from her boss to the young woman and shrugged, unsure what was going on. 

‘Come in, come in’ Sara said, walking over and putting an arm around Caitlin.

The gentle touch seemed to bring on a fresh outpouring of tears and Caitlin threw her arms around Sara, sobbing loudly. 

‘What is it honey? What happened?’

‘I just… Mr. C… and… I…’ Caitlin stuttered before the sobs took over, making it impossible for her to continue.

Sara led her into the office and over to the small table in the corner, settling her in a chair before returning to pull the blinds down to ensure a little privacy. Within seconds, she returned, taking the spot next to Caitlin and returning her arm around the young woman’s shoulder.

‘What’s the matter, sweetie?’ she attempted once again. ‘Tell me what happened.’

Whereas an hour before she’d been angry, Caitlin was now just plain upset, sad at the realization that the man she idolized wasn't who she thought he was.

‘He lied to me.’

‘You mean Jesse?’ Sara said.

‘No’ she sobbed. ‘Mr. C.’

Sara began to put two and two together. Obviously, Neal’s earlier apprehension about sharing his past had been founded; Caitlin appeared more upset about Neal’s deception than the warning he’d tried to give her about Jesse. 

‘What exactly did Neal tell you?’

Caitlin’s face hardened, her eyes growing dark. ‘He’s a criminal.’

Sara gasped. ‘No. No, of course not. He’s not a criminal.’

‘He told me everything’ Caitlin cried. ‘And he tried to turn me against Jesse.’

‘Caitlin, Neal just wants to protect you. To keep you from getting hurt.’

‘Protect me?’ she said, wiping her eyes. ‘By turning me against my own brother?’

Sara looked around. The office setting wasn't particularly conducive to this kind of meltdown. For the time being at least, this latest family crisis took precedence over everything else and she made a split second decision to set work aside.

She got to her feet and reached out her hand. ‘Come on, there’s a quiet little café up the street where we can sit and talk.’

WCWCWC

For the first time since he’d begun camping out on the Caffrey’s sofa, Jesse Davis found himself alone in their home. He’d been waiting for just such an opportunity to snoop around and see if there was anything he could pick up and pawn for some quick cash. The fence he’d met at the bar had told him he dealt in pretty much anything - art, jewelry, expensive knick-knacks, you name it, he pawned it. He’d take pretty well anything of value off his hands and give him some quick cash. 

Ever since he first set foot at the Raphael, Jesse had been plotting his eventual return after hours. He’d taken plenty of photographs while he was there and he’d shared them with Frankie Catalano who had assured him he could get him about fifty cents on the dollar for any original art he could bring to him. The first step was to talk Caitlin into going back after closing time - allegedly to get a better look at all her stuff. That way, he could get a glimpse at the surveillance system, ferret out the security code and get a better look at what was available for the taking. Then, he’d wait until he was ready to leave town and slip into the gallery to grab a few of the more valuable canvasses.

He’d noticed on his first visit that most of the paintings on the first floor sold for between $1,200 to $2,000. apiece. He could probably get about half of that on the black market. If he timed it right, he’d be halfway to Texas, his next stop, by the time the theft was discovered.

Jesse stepped over Raffie by the front door and climbed the stairs up to the master bedroom where he began to poke around. He started with the obvious: Sara’s jewelry box which lay in plain view on her dresser. Sara loved her accessories but it didn't take long for Jesse to conclude that most of this stuff was merely high end costume jewelry. After a while, you developed an eye for the good stuff and within seconds, Jesse had zeroed in on a couple of pairs of gold hoops, some sterling silver earrings and a pair of expensive looking pearls. A ring caught his eye - a vintage cameo that was probably worth a few bucks. Further snooping yielded another ring, an emerald set in fourteen carat gold and a couple of pandora bracelets. He stuffed the items in a small bag and moved to the other dresser where he found a tray of tie clips and cufflinks. Most of them were discarded upon inspection but a couple of pairs of cufflinks seemed higher end, including one pair in particular by Cartier, easily worth $3,000 retail. Maybe it had been a special gift; whatever the reason, they certainly stood out against the more modest pairs that graced the tray. 

He had a quick look in the closet, noting Sara’s propensity for expensive shoes - too bad he couldn't fence those. There had to be several thousand dollars worth of Louboutins and even a pair of open toed Jimmy Choos. He spotted a Vuitton handbag and examined it; it looked like the real thing. He threw it in along with the rest of the stuff and proceeded to walk through both Caitlin and Liam’s rooms before climbing up to the third floor. He got a subtle whiff of Hope’s perfume as he walked into her room and he began to look around, noticing a photograph of her and Cameron which sat on her dresser. He examined the picture and sneered; she had a hot little body, too bad she hadn't given him the time of day. He glanced into her closet, checking out her clothes and shoes - the young woman’s taste in clothing wasn’t nearly as extravagant as her mom’s.

The jewelry box on the night stand held nothing much but costume jewelry but there were a couple of finished canvasses stacked up against the wall and he picked up the first one and examined it. The subject was a sunset on a lake, pretty but nothing special. The second one was a portrait of an old woman with piercing blue eyes. He’d noticed that Hope’s paintings at the gallery were selling for anywhere between $600 and $1000 depending on the size of the canvas. With Hope away, no one would notice they were missing. He decided to forgo the old woman in favour of the sunset in the hopes of getting a few hundred bucks. Every little bit counted.

It wouldn't take long for the owners to notice the missing items, a day or two at the most. That meant he needed to get back inside the gallery ASAP; prolonging his visit more than necessary would just leave him further exposed. Plus, his host was already suspicious of him so he needed to act fast. He could tell by Neal’s reaction the previous day that he’d hit a nerve when he’d made his off-the-cuff remark about forging the greats. Jesse figured he probably had a day or two before all hell broke loose. If need be, he’d be more than happy to break the news to his baby sister about her knight in shining armour; that should help get her on side.

He ran downstairs and looked around the place for any other obvious loot. A sterling silver frame with a wedding photograph caught his eye and he examined it closely. It was worth a fair bit but its disappearance would probably be noticed quickly. Maybe he could grab it at the last minute and fence it when he got to his new destination. He replaced it on the end table and, with his bag of loot firmly in his hand, he grabbed for his coat and stepped out into the cold winter day.

WCWCWC

Peter didn't need to ask for specifics: the coffee shop Neal was referring to was the same one they always went to: the one that stood a few doors down from the Raphael. It was the spot where they got together to discuss business, share a meal, order takeout or simply take a quick break when things got really busy at the gallery. As far as the reason for the impromptu meeting, he’d known better than to ask for details; the sound of Neal’s voice had been enough to convey the seriousness of whatever was on his ex-CI’s mind. 

Peter called out to the two part-timers who were manning the gallery, letting them know he was going out for an hour or so and he grabbed his coat on his way out to meet his best friend. Elizabeth was still on his case about telling Neal about his retirement plans but, thus far, he’d held off - considering the ongoing turmoil currently unfolding in the Caffrey household. He noticed Neal’s car parked up the street and entered the coffee shop, bracing himself for more drama; it was a given, it seemed, when it came to Neal’s family life. 

He spotted his best friend sitting at their regular table, nursing what looked to be a latte - his drink of choice. He’d ordered something for Peter and as he got closer, Peter noticed the espresso he favoured waiting for him.

‘Hey buddy. What’s up?’ he asked, taking off his coat and throwing in on the back of his chair.

Neal’s face was ashen, all colour drained, as if he’d just seen a ghost. ‘Thanks for coming’ he said breathlessly. ‘Is everything okay at the gallery?’

‘Yeah, yeah, Mauro and Mike are there. No worries. You all right?’

Neal let out a long, tortured breath. ‘I told Caitlin about my suspicions.’

‘About Jesse?’

Neal nodded. ‘Yeah. She didn't take it well. She wanted us to confront him right away.’

‘Did you tell her about… you?’

‘Yeah… It didn't go as well as I’d hoped.’

Peter took a sip of his coffee and leaned in to listen. In the past, he’d always remained on the fence whenever Neal asked his opinion on whether he should tell his foster daughter about his sordid past. He’d always thought Neal put way too much stock in that period of his life but he was all for it if Neal felt the need to come clean. 

‘She didn't take it well?’

‘Let’s just say my timing wasn't the greatest. I started by telling her about Jesse. She was defensive at first and she didn't want to believe me. Then she started to come around and she wanted us to go confront him.’

Neal took a long sip of coffee before continuing. ‘I knew Jesse wouldn't hesitate to rat me out so I couldn't let her run off without telling her… about me.’

He paused for a moment. ‘Peter, she called me a hypocrite.’

Peter sighed. ‘You’re not a hypocrite, Neal.’

Neal nodded but remained sullen. ‘She said I was a fraud and that I had no business accusing Jesse when I’d done much worse things myself.’

There was silence for a moment while Peter took it in.

‘She kept asking me who knew’ Neal continued. ‘I think that’s what upset her the most, finding out that everyone in the family knew but her. It was almost like some betrayal, like she’d been the only one I hadn't trusted enough to share my past with.’

‘Did you try to explain why you hadn't told her?’

‘Yeah… I told her I wasn't proud of what I’d done and I didn't want her to think it gave her permission to act out… like I had.’

Peter waited. ‘I didn’t… well, I didn't tell her I was afraid of losing the moral high ground… but I guess that ship has sailed now. I’m afraid she’s going to do something stupid.’ 

‘Damn it’ Peter said. ‘She’s so… impulsive.’

Neal scoffed; Peter had accused him of the same thing most of his adult life.

‘She’ll come around’ Peter mumbled. ‘You’ll see. Just give her a little time to let things settle.’

Neal just sat there, looking despondent. ‘I don’t want to screw up all the work we’ve done with her over the past five years.’

‘You won’t. She’ll think it through and she’ll calm down’ Peter said with confidence.

Neal’s phone vibrated and he pulled it out of his shirt pocket. He glanced at the text message and returned his gaze to Peter.

‘Sara says she showed up at her office’ Neal said, sounding relieved. 

‘Well, that’s good. At least she didn't go running to her brother.’

‘I suppose…’

‘Sara will help her figure it out, you’ll see.’

‘Yeah… yeah’ Neal said with a tentative nod.

‘I’m sorry you have to go through this all over again’ Peter said with genuine empathy.

‘Sometimes I wonder if I should just take out a full page ad in the New York Times and put it out there once and for all for the whole world to see. Sometimes I wonder what the mailman would think if he knew, or the kid who packs our groceries at Sobey’s. Hell, what about the Masons… we’ve known them for over twenty-five years and Lydia and Sam… they’re good friends but they don’t have a clue. How would they react if they knew?’

‘It wouldn't change a thing, Neal. It happened a long time ago. No one would give a damn.’

‘You don't know that for sure’ Neal brooded. His mind continued down the dark path. ‘And what about Bibi… and Chloe. Hell, I haven't even told Cam yet… how’s he going to react?’ 

Peter stared back at his best friend as if to say ‘Come on, Neal, get real!’

‘It never made an ounce of difference to Sara and the kids’ he reminded Neal. ‘They’re the only ones who really matter.’

‘That’s not the same.’

‘Of course it is. Anybody who knows you can see past something that happened thirty years ago.’

Neal cocked an eyebrow. ‘Tell that to Caitlin.’

‘She’s just in shock. She’s probably angry at her brother and she let it out on you. It’s an awful lot for her to digest.’

Neal remained quiet. ‘She’ll come around’ Peter added. ‘Sara will talk her down.’

He could see there was something else bothering Neal. As upsetting as this whole situation with Caitlin was, his reaction seemed somewhat over the top. 

Neal looked him straight in the eye, preparing to confess. ‘I ordered a drink.’

Peter’s mouth dropped open; he hadn't been expecting that.

‘Once Caitlin left, I turned around and ordered a double scotch.’

Peter waited with bated breath; was Neal about to announce he’d fallen off the wagon. And if so, what would be the consequences?

‘I stared at it for a long, long time’ Neal said, his voice quiet. ‘I thought about how great it would feel to let loose, forget all my troubles for a little while, relax.’

‘And then, I thought about Sara, about how close I came to losing her and the kids and… well, that’s when I called you.’

Peter’s hand reached out and gave Neal an affectionate pat on the arm. ‘You did good, Neal.’

Neal shook his head. ‘You don’t understand. I came this close to doing it’ he said holding up his index and thumb and gesturing.

‘But you didn’t’ Peter reminded him.

‘Still… it made me realize I could fall off the wagon at any time. And it scared the shit out of me.’

TBC


	27. Chapter 27

Sara placed a cup of coffee in front of Caitlin and slipped into the seat next to her. 

‘Feeling better?’ she asked.

Caitlin had finally calmed down, the sobbing reduced to a few wayward tears which she wiped with the back of her hand. 

She nodded. ‘Yeah, sorry I showed up at your office like that.’

Sara placed her hand over her foster daughter’s. ‘It’s okay. So, start at the beginning. What happened?’

‘Mr. C says Jesse’s here to make trouble.’

‘He told you about finding Jesse’s wallet?’

Caitlin nodded. ‘He said Jesse brought a gun into the house and had some drugs on him. I told him I wanted to confront him but then… he said there was something else he needed to tell me first. He said Jesse was trying to blackmail him.’ 

‘Neal thought Jesse had figured things out… you know, about his past… and that he was going to use the information to come between the two of you. He couldn't bear it…’

Caitlin’s blue eyes shone brightly from unshed tears. ‘How long have you known?’

Sara was pretty sure she knew what Caitlin was asking but she needed to make sure. As upsetting as the news was about her brother, Sara suspected that it was Neal’s confession about his past that had left her so rattled.

‘You mean about Jesse?’ she asked.

‘No! I mean about Mr. C… and what he did.’

Sara hesitated; Caitlin was obviously upset about having been kept in the dark. She didn't want to further upset her by telling her she’d known about Neal’s past since the very start of their relationship. The truth was she had; she’d always known about Neal’s illicit activities - even before she’d laid eyes on him for the very first time.

‘Honey, first off, you need to know that Neal never deliberately set out to keep anything from you’ she said patiently. ‘He had a… a really rough childhood. I know it’s hard to imagine, considering how close he is to his mom but things weren't always that way.’

Sara weighed each word carefully. She knew that Caitlin was particularly vulnerable and, just like a ticking time bomb, she could go off at any time. She needed her to hear the whole story before passing judgement on Neal for what he’d done.

‘Neal’s dad was a dirty cop’ she continued softly. 

‘What do you mean?’

‘He took bribes and he was found guilty of killing another police officer.’

‘Oh, my god!’

‘He was locked up and Neal and his mom were put into the Witness Protection Program in St. Louis. It was tough… for both of them. Neal was only three years old when it happened. Over time, his mom became more and more despondent. She started drinking and doing drugs and Neal was left to fend for himself most of the time.’ 

Caitlin nodded; she knew Neal and his mom had been estranged but she’d never quite known the reason why. 

‘Neal started getting into trouble. Just small stuff at first. Skipping school, stealing, hanging out with the wrong crowd, running small cons. He discovered he had a knack for it and things began to escalate. When he was eighteen, he couldn't take living at home anymore and he left everything behind and came to New York.’

‘Did you… did you know him, back then?’

‘No. I was only thirteen at the time’ she reminded Caitlin. ‘But after I graduated university, I went to work for Sterling Bosch and I started to hear about this guy who was travelling the globe…’

She hesitated, unsure how much information she should be providing. The last thing she wanted to do was glamourize what Neal had done… or demonize it.

‘Neal was this handsome, brilliant conman and he used the methods at his disposal to get the things he wanted… or at least the things he thought he wanted. My company was trying to recover a painting which had been stolen and he became the prime suspect.’

‘A painting? Which painting?’ Caitlin asked.

Sara shook her head, hesitating to respond. In for a penny, in for a pound, she decided. ‘It was a painting called St. George and the Dragon by an Italian painter by the name of Raffaello Sanzio.’

‘A Raphaël?’ Caitlin repeated, almost in a daze.

‘Yeah, a Raphaël.’

‘So… is that why the gallery…’ Caitlin left the question unfinished.

Sara nodded. ‘Just our little attempt at humour’ she said.

‘And Raffie?’ 

‘That’s just a happy coincidence’ Sara admitted. ‘Liam was going through a Ninja Turtles phase at the time.’

‘So, did he steal it? That Raphaël?’

Sara sighed loudly. If she was going to diffuse this ticking time bomb between the two of them, she needed to be honest, as painful as it was.

‘He did’ she admitted. ‘But he ended up returning it.’

‘Is that how the two of you met?’

‘No. Actually, I had testified against him at his trial years earlier but he was never found guilty of theft. He was, however, convicted of bond forgery and he went to jail for four years.’

Caitlin frowned. She still couldn't believe what she was hearing. ‘Four years…’ she echoed.

‘Then, he did something stupid’ Sara said. ‘Or should I say, something even more stupid. He broke out of prison with just a few months left on his sentence.’

‘Why?’

‘He was worried something had happened to the woman he loved.’

‘You?’

‘No… no. That was a long time before we… got together. This woman’s name was Kate Moreau and Neal loved her very much. She’d stopped coming to see him in prison and he figured she was in some sort of trouble so he escaped to find her.’

Caitlin sat, listening with her mouth hanging open. She’d had no idea this had happened to her foster dad all those years ago.

‘That sounds… romantic’ she said, despite herself.

Sara scoffed. ‘It wasn’t. It was impulsive… and it almost cost him another four years of his life. But Neal loves with his whole being and he doesn't always stop to think about the consequences of his actions when he thinks someone he loves is in some sort of trouble.’

Caitlin could certainly relate to that particular character trait.

‘Honey, Neal was a white collar criminal. That doesn't excuse what he did but he never hurt anyone. He was never violent and he was… well, he was this charming conman who used his good looks and his charisma to get what he wanted. It didn't take long for the FBI to track him down that second time and he was returned to prison for another four years.’

‘By Mr. Burke?’ Caitlin asked.

Sara nodded; it looked like Neal had given her the whole story.

‘Peter could see how talented Neal was and what a waste it would be to keep him locked up. He negotiated a deal to have him come work for him at the Bureau…to help him catch criminals.’

‘But Mr. Burke… he’s like his best friend.’

‘He is his best friend. Neal has paid for his crimes, Caitlin. Many times over. He helped put a lot of people away and he’s not a criminal. Not anymore.’ 

‘What happened to her? To Kate?’

Sara let out a long, slow breath. She hadn't intended getting so deep in the weeds but holding back would just make Caitlin feel worse than she already felt. She deserved to know the truth. All of it.

‘She died later on… in an explosion.’

‘An explosion? That’s horrible!’

‘It was and Neal had to cope with that as well as everything else.’

‘How did you ever forgive him for all those things he did?’ Caitlin sniffled.

‘Neal has the kindest heart of anyone I’ve ever met. When I got to know him, after Kate died, I could see how much he was hurting and how vulnerable he was. He used to hide behind this wall of fake confidence and bravado, act all macho but inside he was a hurt little boy with abandonment issues.’

Sara kept a firm hold of Caitlin’s hand, almost as if she was afraid she’d get up and walk out before she had a chance to say what she needed to say.

‘You know, when he inherited all that money from June, he could have done anything with it: we could have bought a bigger house, a boat, a house in the country, we could have gone on trips to Europe every year, spoiled Hope and Liam… but Neal didn't want any of that, he wanted to help kids who where… struggling.’

‘You mean… kids like me.’

Caitlin frowned as she attempted to understand. ‘But I don’t understand why he didn't tell me all this when I started coming to the school. Or when I moved in with you? He told Liam and Hope, why didn't he tell me?’

Sara gave her a look of disbelief. ‘Are you kidding? You were a student at the school who’d accused him of sexual misconduct. Do you really think he wanted you to see his vulnerabilities? To have you find out about his past? He got it in his head that you wouldn't respect him if you knew. Why do you think he was never comfortable enough to let you call him by his first name? He wanted you to look up to him.’

Caitlin stared down at the table, embarrassed. Falsely accusing her benefactor of acting inappropriately had not been her finest hour. To this day, she couldn't quite understand how he’d come to forgive her.

‘Besides, both Hope and Liam found out almost by accident - and they were young when they started asking questions so it was a lot easier for him to explain. They love their dad… they know his past has nothing to do with the man he is today.’

Sara took a sip of coffee and let things sit for a moment. From the look on Caitlin’s face, she surmised she might be getting through to her; at least she hoped so.

‘When Neal decided to start the school, all he wanted was to help kids like you… kids like him. Truth is, if there’d been a June Ellington School of Art when he was young, maybe he wouldn't have done all the things he did and he wouldn't have had to go through so much.’

She took a deep breath before continuing. She realized what she was about to say was really the crux of the matter. ‘You know Caitlin, every time Neal looks at you, he sees himself at your age.’

‘What?’

‘He doesn't want you to make the same mistakes he made. He can see you have a good heart and you’re so talented. But he can also see that you’re impulsive, just like he was. He wants you to succeed, to be happy. That’s why he gets so frustrated and angry when you act out. He… look I don't think he articulates it quite this clearly but I think he sees you as his chance at redemption… for all the bad things he did back then, the people he hurt along the way.’

‘I… really?’

‘Really’ Sara said with a gentle smile. ‘Deciding to tell you was a really, really big deal for him. He was afraid you’d lose respect for him, that you wouldn't see him for who he really is. We talked about it… a lot, especially in the beginning.’

‘What? You talked about telling me?’

Sara nodded. ‘I tried to convince him that you’d understand but… I think he was embarrassed, ashamed. He didn't want you to think less of him, to stop seeing him as a mentor, a father figure. He thought he wouldn't be able to have a positive influence on you if you found out the truth.’

The tears were flowing once again, the emotions getting the better of the young woman.

‘I called him a… a fraud, a hypocrite’ she admitted.

Sara flinched. She could only imagine how such an accusation would affect a sensitive man such as her husband.

‘Is that really what you think?’

Caitlin shook her head, eyes downcast. ‘No’ she murmured.

Sara ran her hand through Caitlin’s hair. ‘It’s all right. You two will work it out. Honey, Neal is a good, decent man. You’re like a daughter to him. He loves you and he wants what’s best for you. This thing with Jesse… he just doesn't want to see you get hurt.’

‘I don’t… I could never stop respecting him… or you’ she admitted. ‘You’ve given me a family. I never had a family.’

Sara smiled and squeezed her hand. ‘Well, families aren’t perfect but you need to know that Neal never meant to hurt you by keeping this from you. In some strange way, he thought he was protecting you.’

‘Do you really think Jesse’s here to make trouble?’

‘I don’t know. But I do trust Neal and his instincts are rarely wrong.’

Caitlin shrugged. ‘I trust him too’ she admitted.

Sara’s hand came to rest on her foster daughter’s shoulder and she squeezed gently. ‘What do you say we go home and try to figure this whole thing out?’

WCWCWC

The large parcel of land just outside Watertown looked even more impressive than Hope had remembered. The last time she’d been there, she and Cam had arrived at dusk and had left first thing in the morning after Bonnie had loaded them up on a big country breakfast before sending them on their way. Now, in broad daylight, she couldn't believe just how much space was out there - and it all belonged to the Armstrong family.  
Owen offered to take his big brother and Hope around to visit the stables and the large barren fields which in another few months would be overflowing with corn and other bounty. Cam and Hope snuggled together on the tractor, bundled up in their winter coats and warm woolen scarves and mittens. The fields seemed to go on forever and the forty or so head of cattle in the barn were an impressive sight, to say nothing of the loud honking sound they made when the three of them entered the barn. To Hope’s surprise, there was lots of modern farming equipment, especially to milk and feed the cows. The whole experience seemed so different from anything she’d ever known, being a big city girl and all. 

Another smaller building housed four horses, one of which, Cam announced, was Lucy’s baby, a colt named Cinnamon - no doubt because of his reddish coat, Owen was quick to explain.

‘We can go riding while we’re here if you want’ Cam said as Hope stared back in awe.

She’d never ridden a horse before, except for the occasional pony at the local Westchester County Fair when she was a little girl. In comparison, these guys looked enormous, from their impressive hooves to their sturdy flanks and their wet muzzles.

When they returned to the large farmhouse, Rhonda and Lucy were bickering about who would be giving up her bed for the newcomer while Bonnie stood at the stove warming up some milk for hot chocolate.

‘That’s enough, girls’ she said, her voice authoritative despite her short stature. ‘We’ve already discussed this. Rhonda, go get those cookies I made from the pantry.’

The sixteen-year-old let out a frustrated sigh and did as she was told while Lucy, three years her junior, settled in at the table with a tablet and a set of colouring pencils.

Hope took a seat next to her and pointed. ‘Wow!’ she said as Cam smiled. ‘You have real talent.’

Lucy smiled back at her. ‘I love drawing, it’s my favourite pastime. Well, that and riding horses. Did you see Cinnamon?’ she asked.

Hope nodded. ‘He’s beautiful.’ 

Lucy gave her a proud grin. ‘You can ride him if you like.’

Rhonda returned with a large metal box and proceeded to place three different kinds of cookies on a platter her mom had set down on the table.

‘I hope you like these’ Bonnie said as she began to pour the hot chocolate into large mugs. ‘Cameron mentioned you were partial to oatmeal raisin cookies.’

‘They look great!’ Hope enthused. ‘And they smell amazing.’

She took one of the cookies and placed it in front of her on a small plate. ‘Thanks again for having us.’ 

‘Don’t be silly; you’re practically part of the family’ Bonnie said as the girls stared at Hope.

‘You have pretty hair’ Lucy said, out of the blue. ‘Can I touch it?’

Rhonda scoffed. ‘You goof! You don’t ask someone if you can touch their hair.’

‘It’s all right’ Hope said with a friendly grin. ‘Of course you can touch it.’

Lucy stuck out her tongue at her sister and ran her hand over Hope’s thick, wavy hair.

Hope reached out and touched the girl’s soft, blond head. ‘When I was little, I always wanted straight blonde hair like yours.’

‘You can have it’ the girl said with a frown before returning to her drawing.

‘So what’s it like, living in New York City?’ Rhonda asked with stars in her eyes.

‘It’s… well, it’s like living anywhere. Just a lot more people, that’s all.’

‘But you have all those plays and art galleries and restaurants’ Lucy said.

‘That’s true’ Hope said.

Rhonda piped up. ‘Do you ever see movie stars walking around the street?’ she asked, her eyes shiny with excitement.

Hope chuckled. ‘Not very often. I did see Reese Witherspoon in Times Square once a couple of years back.’ 

She turned to look at Cam. ‘Oh, and remember that time Robert De Niro came into the gallery with his daughter?’

‘Who’s Robert De Niro?’ Lucy asked, looking up from her drawing.

Her older sister looked at her as if she’d grown a second head. ‘You’re kidding, right. Robert De Niro, The Godfather.’

‘Whose godfather?’ Lucy asked, puzzled.

‘Seriously!’ Rhonda scoffed, turning to look at Hope with stars in her eyes. ‘Did he buy anything?’

‘Yeah, didn't he get one of those paintings you did from that cottage series?’ Cam asked.

‘Robert De Niro bought one of your paintings?’ Rhonda asked.

‘I think it was for his daughter’s apartment’ Hope replied with a smile.

‘Mom said maybe next summer she’d let me come and visit you’ Rhonda said to her big brother.

Lucy rolled her eyes and looked over at her mother. ‘That’s so unfair, Mom!’ she whined.

‘When you’re sixteen, we can talk about a trip for you. In the meantime, keep your nose to the grindstone.’

Hope could see that benevolent yet firm look in Bonnie’s eyes, not unlike those of Cam’s. He’d always been very disciplined yet kind; now, she could see he got it at least in part from his mom.

‘I thought we’d have pot roast for your first night here’ Bonnie Armstrong announced.

‘Don’t go to any trouble for me’ Hope replied.

Cam piped up. ‘Are you kidding? Pot roast is like a weekday meal around here, right Ma?’

Hope chuckled at his use of the word ‘ma’ to address his mom. It always reminded her of those old movies she used to watch on TV with her dad on Saturday mornings - Ma and Pa Kettle. Bonnie Armstrong was the furthest thing from Ma Kettle though; she was petite and pretty and very modern in many ways. She worked part-time at one of the high schools in Watertown, helping in the library. At first, the girls had been horrified to have their mom around when they were hanging out with their friends but in time, Bonnie had just faded into the background. As if reading her mind, the woman spoke up.

‘I hope you don’t mind. I tried to get the whole week off but they couldn't get anybody to fill in for me on Friday, so I’m going to have to go in to work.’

‘Ma, you shouldn't have taken the week off. Hope and I can manage just fine without having you holding our hand. I’m going to take her into town one day and maybe I’ll teach her how to milk the cows… by hand’ he teased, wagging his eyebrows.

Bonnie stood behind her son, her head barely peeking out over the top of his - even though he was sitting down.

She kissed his hair. ‘I haven't seen you in almost six months. I plan on spending every single waking minute with the two of you.’

Cam glanced at Hope who just nodded and smiled back.

‘I’ve got tons of things for us to do and if you’re interested Hope, I can show you how to make Cam’s favourite meal: veal piccata.’

Hope looked over at her fiancée. She’d known him for close to seven years and had shared countless meals with him but she’d never once heard him mention he liked veal piccata nor had he ever ordered it in any restaurant they’d ever been to. 

‘Maaaaa’ Cam whined.

‘I’m a modern woman’ Bonnie said, putting up her hand to silence him. ‘But I know that the way to a man’s heart is still through his stomach. How do you think I got your dad to marry me?’

‘Not that story again’ Lucy moaned.

‘Hush. Hope is going to marry your brother and she needs to know what he likes.’

She took a seat at the table right beside Hope and placed her hand on Hope’s arm, making certain she had her full attention. ‘Fred Armstrong was the most introverted, most awkward teenager you could possibly imagine. I invited him to my parents’ place for dinner one Sunday night and my mom made a pecan pie.’

The back door opened and Hope could see her future father-in-law through the doorway to the back room, standing there in his coveralls, over his bulky winter coat. He began to remove his large winter boots and the coveralls, leaving everything in a pile on the floor.

‘Well!’ Bonnie continued as the two girls looked at Hope and rolled their eyes. ‘Fred says that was the day he knew he wanted to marry me.’

Little Joseph appeared and walked over to where everyone was sitting. ‘Mom, can I have some cookies?’ he asked. As tall and lanky as Cam was, Joe was the exact opposite, dark wavy hair and eyes like his dad’s and a much smaller stature, like his mom.

Meanwhile, Fred Armstrong stepped into the kitchen and walked over to where his wife was sitting, reaching over her shoulder for a cookie and kissing her cheek at the same time. Hope couldn't help but notice; the move was reminiscent of the affection she’d witnessed between her own mom and dad since the day she was born. If genetics had anything to do with it, she and Cam would have a long and happy marriage.

‘She’s right!’ Fred said, his mouth full and grabbing for a second cookie. ‘Would have never married her if it wasn't for her pecan pie.’

She slapped him good-naturedly and the man chuckled and winked at Hope.

It was organized chaos; there was lots of laughter and obviously plenty of love to go around.

This might not be her home, but it was home nonetheless.

WCWCWC

‘No, no, no, you’re our guest’ Bonnie Armstrong said as she shooed Hope away from the large kitchen table. 

The meal, consisting of pot roast, mashed potatoes, gravy, peas and carrots and pecan pie with vanilla ice cream had been enjoyed by all and Rhonda and Owen were already on their feet, clearing the dishes off the table.

‘No fair’ cried Lucy.

‘You’ve got to be quick’ Owen said with a grin.

Hope looked puzzled and Cam gave her a wink. ‘I’ll explain later’ he whispered. 

Bonnie took Hope and Cam by the arm and pointed them in the direction of the sitting room - as they liked to call their family room. ‘You go sit and I’ll make us all some tea. Joe, go put the kettle on. Fred, put another log on the fire.’

Cam chuckled and took Hope’s arm, leading her towards the love seat by the fireplace.

‘Whoever clears the table doesn't have to do the dishes so… it’s just this little game we used to play. Hurrying to clear the table so we wouldn't be stuck doing the dishes.’

Hope nodded in understanding.

Rhonda popped her head into the sitting room. ‘Mom wants to know what you take in your tea’ she said to Hope.

‘Just a little milk please’ Hope replied as Rhonda disappeared.

‘There all so different!’ she whispered to Cam.

His siblings all had their own interests and personalities and yet they managed to live under the same roof with love and respect - a testimony to their parents who had always encouraged them to be their own best selves. The only member of the family Hope had yet to meet was Becky who’d been given the night off from her farming duties and was out with her new beau, a young man she’d recently met. 

‘So, tell me again. Becky is twenty-two and she helps your dad with the business.’

‘Twenty-three’ Cam corrected.

‘And Owen is nineteen.’

‘Yup and he’s taking classes at Jefferson to become an automotive technician. He helps around the farm too. Dad counts on him to keep the machinery running smoothly.’

‘Rhonda is sixteen and Lucy, thirteen and they’re both in high school and Joe is… eleven?’

‘Turning twelve next month’ Cam said.

She studied his face, noticing a sense of pride as she rhymed off the names of each of his siblings. ‘You know, you and I have talked about having kids but we’ve never really talked about how many.’

Cam’s eyes lit up and he leaned in to kiss her neck. ‘One - or maybe two at a time?’

‘Oh no! Are you telling me twins run in your family?’

‘On my mother’s side, she’s a twin’ he said as Hope’s eyes grew in surprise. ‘And on my dad’s side, he has cousins who are twins.’

There was a loud cough coming from the doorway and the two of them looked up to find Lucy standing there with a couple of mugs of tea.

‘Later’ Cam murmured as he pulled away.

WCWCWC

Peter ordered another round of coffees and settled back down across the table from his best friend. He wondered in passing what it felt like to have made a mistake early in life only to have it constantly brought up, reexamined and regurgitated — even after you’d atoned and made amends. He would never know. But Neal sure did.

‘I’m proud of you, you know’ he said, taking his seat.

Neal looked up, his eyes searching his best friend’s. 

‘You didn't give in to your urges’ Peter continued. ‘Keep this up and I’m going to have to stop accusing you of being so impulsive.’

Neal scoffed and smiled through the sadness. 

‘It scared me though, Peter. To realize how close I came to… how I could let things go that far.’

‘I think you’re forgetting the most important part.’

Neal looked up, his eyes narrowing.

‘You walked away from that drink, Neal. You’re stronger than you think.’

The other man shook his head. ‘If I’m so strong, how did I let it got so far?’

‘What you did is the true measure of your character. Back when the whole fiasco with Hope happened, you didn't have the strength to walk away. Now, you do.’ 

Neal seemed to relax. ‘Now, I know what’s at stake if I… give in. But I still don't know if Caitlin and I are going to be able to work through this.’

Peter got a faraway look in his eye. ‘Do you remember that day you showed up on my doorstep?’

Neal gave him a look of consternation. ‘You’re going to have to be a little more specific than that.’

‘That day Hope got drunk and said you had no right to reprimand her because you’d gone to prison.’

Neal sighed; of course he remembered. He’d been devastated when his little girl had thought so little of him to bring up his past so cruelly and unexpectedly. 

‘That day, I told you what I’m about to tell you again. Just talk to Caitlin, she loves you Neal and eventually, she’ll understand why you felt the need to keep this from her.’

Neal’s phone buzzed again and he jumped on it like he was afraid it might grow legs and run away.

‘It’s Sara again’ he said, glancing at the screen. ‘She says Caitlin’s feeling better. We’re going to meet up at home and have a chat with Jesse.’

Peter nodded. ‘See? Everything’s going to be fine, Neal.’

Neal nodded. ‘You’re right. I’ve got the rest of my life to try to explain things to Caitlin but for now, I need to help her realize that this guy is nothing but trouble.’

TBC


	28. Chapter 28

The house was eerily quiet when Caitlin and Sara returned. No sign of Jesse, no sign of Neal. Raffie, who usually made the effort of greeting his humans with a minimum of enthusiasm, lay listlessly on his side by the front door. He gave them both a dismissive glance, his tail wagging lethargically against the hard wood floor without even bothering to lift his head. 

‘Neal!’ Sara called out, on the off-chance he was upstairs or down in the basement.

Silence.

The women hung their coats in the front hall closet and made their way into the kitchen where Caitlin gravitated to the fridge and immediately began to poke around in the freezer.

‘Do we have any shrimp? I thought I could make a stir-fry for dinner.’

Sara chuckled softly at the mention of one of Neal’s favourite weekday meals. ‘You know, you don’t have to make shrimp stir-fry because of Neal. Just talk to him, Caitlin. I’m sure that’s all he wants.’

‘I will but… we have to eat, right? We might as well make something he likes.’

Sara smiled to herself. Following her little talk with Caitlin, she was feeling confident the two of them would find a way to work things out. Whatever hurtful things Caitlin might have said to him in a moment of anger would soon be forgotten. If there was one thing she knew about her husband, it was that he never held a grudge.

She found it rather ironic that, after all the hand wringing she’d done about Neal’s antics early on in their relationship, she would be the one to come to his defence for his criminal past. Of course, Neal wasn't that guy anymore and he’d proven himself time and time again over their nearly twenty-five years of conjugal life. Even though he most definitely still had a touch of the rascal in him, it was much more nuanced these days and frankly, she wouldn't want him any other way. That lack of self-control was part of who Neal was and it was one of the reasons she’d fallen in love with him in the first place. 

She and Caitlin settled side by side to work at the kitchen counter and were partway through cutting up some veggies when the front door opened. Raffie left their side to welcome the new arrival, panting as he went.

‘Sara!’ Neal’s voice was heard from the front of the house.

‘We’re in the kitchen’ she called back. 

She gave Caitlin a look of encouragement and a head nod in the direction of Neal’s voice and Caitlin put down her knife, nervously wiping her hands on a nearby dishtowel.

Neal appeared and Sara watched the exchange of strained glances between him and Caitlin; it was obvious they’d left some things unsaid and she’d need to give them the opportunity to talk it out.

‘Is Jesse here?’ Neal asked, glancing around the space.

‘No’ Sara replied. She walked towards him and placed a hand on his forearm, searching his eyes. She gave him a weak smile and reached up to kiss his cheek.

‘I’m going to run up and change before dinner’ she said while Caitlin stood there, rooted to her spot on the floor. She let her voice drop to a whisper. ‘Go talk to her.’

Neal returned Sara’s smile and turned to face his foster daughter who seemed rather unsure of where she stood. He was eager to put things right and he felt it was incumbent upon him to reach out and make the first move.

‘Did you… want to finish what we started talking about earlier?’ he asked, pointing to the couch in the family room.

‘Yeah’ Caitlin replied, her voice quiet.

They walked over and took a seat, side by side and Neal waited for her to speak. He knew Sara had probably filled in some of the blanks but he wasn't sure which ones or what questions Caitlin might still have.

‘I’m sorry I ran out on you at the restaurant’ she began, eyes lowered.

‘It’s okay, you were upset’ he replied.

‘I guess I was… it took me by surprise… everything you said… about Jesse… and about you. I mean, what happened to you when you were younger.’

Neal listened. He’d never considered that any of the events in his life had just happened to him. He’d been the sole architect of his destiny, the one who’d made all those horrible choices. Over and over and over again, it seemed.

‘Sara told me… about how things were when you were little, that your dad went to jail and how Grandma had trouble coping. She said you started to act out and get into trouble and that things just got… worse and worse.’

Maybe there was still time to turn this all around, Neal thought. Make it a teachable moment. He’d been about her age when he'd started carrying out high risk cons. At twenty, he was already working with Mozzie and oblivious to the fact that he was well on his way to digging his hole even deeper… all the way to Sing Sing. 

‘It’s true’ Neal said. ‘Things were rough when I was young but that’s not an excuse for what I did, Caitlin. Everyone’s responsible for their own actions and I’m not proud of the fact I might have hurt people along the way.’

‘Sara said you never hurt anyone, that you were never violent.’

Leave it to Sara to downplay the effects of his many crimes. ‘I never physically harmed anyone but I’m past kidding myself that I didn't hurt people by… some of the things I said… and some of the things I did.’

Caitlin retreated behind her blond bangs, reminiscent of how she was when she’d first come into their lives. Neal hated to think she’d go back to being that angry, frustrated little girl, not after he and Sara had worked so hard to help her come into her own. 

‘Why… why did you do it?’

Neal scoffed. ‘The truth? Because I could get away with it I guess. It was… a rush. Conning someone out of something that belonged to them or forging a painting or bank bonds… in some weird, twisted way, it became a measure of what I could accomplish.’

‘Sara said you escaped from prison for a girl.’

He was surprised by the statement. Sara had obviously filled her in on some of the details of his journey; he was relieved not to have to repeat the whole sordid tale of Kate and her untimely demise.   
‘That’s right. Her name was Kate and I was convinced she was in some sort of trouble so I plotted a way to get out of prison. But it didn't take long for Peter to find me once I’d escaped. Not that I was hiding, really. I was holed up in the apartment I’d shared with her, just waiting for them to come and get me.’  
‘Why?’

‘Why did I let them find me?’

Caitlin nodded.

‘Because Kate was gone by the time I got there and I didn't see any point in running anymore. And besides, I knew it was inevitable, I knew Peter would catch up with me.’

‘Why did you stop… doing those things in the end?’

Neal inhaled deeply. This was no time to hold back; Caitlin deserved to know the truth.

‘It didn't happen overnight, that’s for sure. While I was working with the Bureau, I was… well, I wasn't always honest with Peter. Even though I was on the anklet, I was still doing things behind his back. But working with Peter helped me see I could use my skills for the greater good so I slowly started to gravitate in that direction. It took a long time though and I often felt like I was being pulled in both directions. And then, Sara got pregnant and everything changed. None of it seemed all that much fun any more, the cons, the lies, the deceptions. I didn't want my little girl to grow up with a dad who might be thrown in jail at any minute. Hope was seven months old when I finally got off the anklet.’

‘So, you really wore an anklet? Like in the movies?’

‘Yeah… not very glamorous though, itchy as hell.’

Caitlin laughed. ‘I’m sorry I called you a criminal.’

Neal just smiled and shrugged. ‘I was a criminal.’

‘And I’m sorry I said you were a… phoney.’

Neal began to relax. ‘I believe the word you used was ‘fraud’.

Seeing the mischief in his eyes, Caitlin replied with a small smile of her own. 

‘I always wondered why the gallery was called the Raphael’ she said. ‘Now I know.’

‘Oh, Sara told you about that, huh?’

Caitlin chuckled. 

‘I guess you could say we have a twisted sense of humour’ he admitted.

The tension between them had begun to dissipate and Neal brought his arm to rest around Caitlin’s shoulder. He pulled her in to him. The movement seemed to reignite some unexpected emotions and he felt her start to shake as he held her.

‘I’m so sorry I hurt you Caitlin’ Neal was saying into her blond head of hair. ‘I really was trying to do the right thing.’

She sniffled. ‘I know.’

She pulled away. ‘What are we going to do about Jesse?’

‘I think we should tell him that we know he lied about getting mugged. Then we can see how he reacts.’

Caitlin nodded.

‘You know you don’t have to be there… if you don't want to.’

‘No, I want to. I need to see for myself if he’s lying.’

She seemed to have second thoughts. ‘But I really don’t want to confront him.’

Neal’s eyes brightened. ‘How about you listen in while I’m talking to him. He doesn't have to know you’re there.’

‘You mean like… hide?’

‘Why not? It’ll be like we’re running our own little con’ he said with a naughty smile.

She was giving that some thought when Sara reappeared in a pair of slacks and a sweater and seemingly pleased with what she was seeing. Neal waved her closer and he put his other arm around her, pulling her close. 

‘Where’s Jesse now?’ he asked Caitlin.

Caitlin pulled out her phone. ‘Last I heard was about an hour ago. He said he was meeting a friend for a drink.’

‘Did he say what time he'd be back?’

Caitlin shook her head. ‘But we can wait him out, right?’

Neal pulled her in to him and kissed the top of her head. ‘Yeah. We can wait him out.’

WCWCWC

Hope stood unpacking her bag in the room she would be sharing with Lucy Armstrong. It was strange to imagine sleeping in separate beds with Cameron so close by but there’d been no mistaking the sleeping arrangements when Bonnie Armstrong had pointed to the second floor, directing Hope - and only Hope - up the stairs. Bonnie and Fred weren’t stupid; they’d surmised from talking to Cam that Hope spent most weekends at his apartment. He’d even mentioned that he’d spent the previous night at the Caffreys. And Bonnie was pretty sure he hadn't slept on their couch. If Sara and Neal Caffrey were all right with the kids sleeping together, that was their business but as long as they were under their roof, Bonnie and Fred Armstrong had strict rules when it came to unmarried couples’ sleeping accomodations. They had the other kids to think about and if they turned a blind eye, what message would that be giving young impressionable minds about premarital sex.

Hope had expected as much but it was still strange when Cameron walked her to the bottom of the staircase under his mom’s watchful eye and gave her a chaste kiss on the cheek goodnight. He’d been directed to the couch in the parlour where he’d be sacking out before his mom followed Hope up the stairs to show her where her room was.

The farmhouse had a total of five large bedrooms, a huge home by Hope’s standards but then again, it housed a large family, something that was foreign to her. Back in White Plains, it had always been just the four of them up until the time Caitlin Somersby had joined the family. She recalled how the teen’s arrival had forced everybody to scramble in order to adapt. Her folks had even resorted to renovating the third floor, adding a fourth bedroom and a bathroom up there in order to make room for the newcomer. 

Having seven people - make that nine with her and Cameron - living under the same roof made for a lot of comings and goings and required a certain amount of coordination, to say nothing of good will on everyone’s part. The fact that there was only one full bathroom only added to the chaos; that would be fun in the morning, she reflected. Back home, with the addition of the bathroom on the third floor, the Caffreys had three bathrooms and there was little congestion, especially since Liam had moved to Syracuse. In contrast, she’d noticed a schedule on the Armstrong’s bathroom door, scripted in what she guessed was Bonnie’s tidy handwriting and outlining the daily schedule for showers and baths. Luckily, there was a toilet downstairs for emergencies but sadly no shower or bath.

Hope continued unpacking, her mind wandering to thoughts of her baby brother. She hadn't planned on it but she realized she was just a little over an hour from Syracuse. Maybe Liam would be up to meeting for lunch or coffee while she was here. Even though she’d seen him just recently, the holidays had been a busy time and while he’d been home, the Caffrey family had travelled in a pack, leaving little time for those heart to hearts the siblings enjoyed so much. Maybe she could kill two birds with one stone and take advantage of her proximity to share the plans for their upcoming wedding. She resolved to text him and see if they could set something up. 

Hope had enjoyed the loud, boisterous banter at dinner. She’d been rather quiet throughout the meal, simply observing and getting to know each one of Cameron’s siblings. They were all so different with a variety of skills and interests but what they seemed to have in common was a strong family bond and a deep and abiding love for their parents. 

Cameron was everybody’s big brother in every sense of the word. She could tell that Owen looked up to him. At dinner, he’d sat next to him and engaged him in conversation about his classes at Jefferson and she’d overheard him hinting that there was this girl he was interested in asking out. Hope had noticed that Rhonda and Lucy, although close in age, couldn't be more different. Whereas Rhonda was serious and no-nonsense, Lucy appeared to be much more of a dreamer, a budding artist, and Hope had been intrigued by the young girl. She’d noticed that Rhonda badgered her younger sister relentlessly, often making fun of her. Luckily, Lucy seemed oblivious to the teasing, content to be her own person. 

Becky, who Hope still hadn't met, was, by all accounts, a very serious, hard-working young woman. She spent countless hours every week working for her dad - doing the bookkeeping, the accounts payable and receivable, the marketing and engaging with their many distributors. Cam had mentioned that, on top of all that, the young woman had no compunction about pitching in during peak times to help her dad tend to the day to day running of the farm.

Little Joe, as the Armstrongs called their young son, seemed like a gentle soul. While the rest of the family had gathered around a Monopoly board for a friendly after dinner game, he’d spent the evening finishing up his homework and playing video games in the parlour - a small room off the kitchen with a couch and television set.

Bonnie Armstrong ran the place like a military operation and Hope could only image why. That was an awful lot of people to get organized, fed, clothed and out the door on time every day. And yet, her future mother-in-law did it with a lot of ease and finesse: a steel hand in a velvet glove. Bonnie did not appear to suffer fools gladly but she was quick with a smile and a hug and it was obvious her kids had a lot of respect for her. Her future father-in-law was more of a strong, silent type, Hope had observed. He was quick with the one-liners and it appeared his job was to support his wife and keep the farm running smoothy, considering he was the main breadwinner.

It hadn't escaped Hope’s notice how he’d cornered Cameron after dinner and how father and son had sat huddled together, discussing life in the big city. Fred Armstrong had very little interest in art and art galleries but it was obvious that whatever was of interest to his son was of interest to him. Wasn't that always the way with fathers and sons?

Overall, there was a frenetic yet positive vibe in the big old farmhouse just outside of Watertown and Hope was happy to be a part of it - at least for the next few days. She pulled a sweater out of her suitcase and held it up, smoothing it out before folding it up again and placing it in the top drawer Lucy had cleared out for her use.

‘That’s pretty’ came a voice over her shoulder. 

The young girl stood in the doorway, her sketching pad pulled in tightly against her chest - apparently a permanent fixture where she was concerned.

‘Your brother bought me this sweater for Christmas’ Hope explained.

‘Cameron goes shopping?’ Lucy asked as Hope nodded. ‘Daddy never goes shopping. He always sends Becky out to buy presents for Mom.’

Hope chuckled at the child’s uncensored comment.

‘Mom wants to know if you want to be on the schedule for the bathroom before bed or in the morning. Basically, you get fifteen minutes without interruption.’

Hope looked at the young girl, puzzled. ‘There’s an opening at 10:30 at night and another at 8:45 in the morning after Owen, Rhonda, Joe and I leave for school.’

Hope nodded in understanding. ‘Hum… I guess I’ll take the 10:30 slot if that’s okay.’

Lucy nodded and threw her pad onto her bed before running out to inform her mom. Hope took a few steps and picked up the drawing, a perfect likeness of the child’s beloved colt. It appeared Cameron wasn't the only Armstrong offspring blessed with creative genes.

Hope sat on the edge of the bed and reached for her purse. She began typing a message to her mom.

‘Arrived safely’ she wrote. ‘Everyone here is great!’

She waited a moment in case Sara responded immediately but after a minute or so she deduced her mom must be busy. She’d get a response. Eventually.

Her next text got an immediate response. Liam didn't have any classes on Fridays and the siblings agreed to meet at a diner in Pulaski, almost exactly halfway between Syracuse and Watertown. 

With that, Hope returned to the task of unpacking. 

WCWCWC

Neal was surprised when the phone rang at 10:30 and he heard Mozzie’s voice on the other end.

‘I think Jesse’s headed back to your place’ the man said.

‘You followed him?’ 

‘Of course’ Mozzie replied smugly. ‘He met with Frankie again and this time, he had some stuff to pawn.’ 

‘What kind of stuff?’

‘Huh… you might want to check your bedroom, Neal. Remember those cufflinks from that heist in Madrid. The ones you kept because you said they had ‘sentimental value’?’

Neal frowned; he could practically imagine Mozzie using air quotes as he spoke. The pair of Cartier cufflinks he was referring to were worth a small fortune. It was one of the few things Neal had kept from his old life. He’d been romancing an older socialite during an elaborate con he and Mozzie were running and she’d given them to him as a gift the night before they robbed her blind. The damn things were worth more than he made in a week. 

‘He stole them?’

‘Yeah, along with a couple of expensive looking earrings that I’m pretty sure belong to your wife. I spotted those pearls you gave her on your wedding day.’

The initial pair he’d given Sara had long been replaced by an even more expensive pair when Sara had misplaced one of the originals but that was a moot point if they were now missing.

‘Damn it!’

‘Oh, and he had one of Hope’s paintings with him. Not sure how he got his hands on that.’

‘Shit! Got to give it to him, the guy’s got balls.’

‘It’s okay. I got it all back.’

‘You bought all the suff back from Frankie?’

Mozzie let out a grunt. ‘You can thank me later’ he grumbled.

‘Thanks Moz’ Neal said. ‘How much did Jesse get for it?’

‘Frankie said he gave him two G’s. He wanted three from me before he gave it all back. Cheap son of a bitch. Fifty percent interest is pretty good considering he had the stuff in his hands for all of five minutes. Anyway, I figured it would be worth it to you.’

‘I cannot believe this guy!’ Neal lamented.

‘Who? Jesse or Frankie?’

‘Both of them!’

‘Oh, and Frankie says Jesse claims he can get him some art. He showed me some of the pictures, it looks like stuff from the gallery.’

‘Jeez!’ Neal exclaimed. ‘The hits keep on coming.’

‘Anyway, he headed out about ten minutes ago. I assume he’s going back to your place.’

‘Thanks Moz! I owe you one.’

Mozzie cleared his throat. ‘Not to put too fine a point on it, Neal but… actually you owe me three.’

WCWCWC

There was something about breathing in the country air that made all your troubles fade away and Hope lay drowsily on the twin bed next to Lucy Armstrong, enjoying the quiet.

Well, quiet was a relative term, considering the thirteen-year-old was yammering away, confiding in her new best friend about her troubled relationship with her sister.

‘She’s always so nasty to me’ she was saying. ‘But I try to pretend it doesn't bother me.’

Hope turned over to face the girl. ‘Maybe you should tell her how you feel.’

‘And give her all that power over me?’ Lucy replied.

‘It’s not power’ Hope replied. ‘It’s just owning your feelings. At least she’ll know how you feel and if she still wants to act that way, it’ll be on her.’

Lucy huffed and seemed to move on. ‘What’s it like to be in love?’ she asked, changing the subject suddenly.

Hope chuckled at her fickleness. ‘It’s like… everything that’s good in your life is a hundred times better and the stuff that’s not so great… well, it doesn't matter quite as much.’

‘Are you and Cameron getting married?’ the blond-haired girl asked, pushing herself up onto her elbow so she could look over at Hope.

‘Yes, we are.’

‘When?’

‘Soon’ Hope replied cryptically.

‘Are we going to your wedding?’

‘Of course you are. If you want to.’

‘Will it be in New York City?’

Hope was compelled to answer. ‘Yes’ she said, her voice quiet.

‘So I could come to New York and visit?’

‘If your parents agree, you’re all invited to the wedding.’

Lucy’s mind changed track once more. ‘What’s it like to kiss a boy?’ she asked.

Hope was taken aback by the query. She hesitated for a moment before answering. ‘It’s like… if you really care about the boy, it’s the most wonderful thing in the world.’

Lucy brought the back of her hand to her lips and began to mimic kissing. ‘Sometimes I pretend I’m kissing Austin Porter.’

Hope giggled. ‘Is that a boy from school?’

‘No! I wish! He’s from Pretty Much.’ 

‘Pretty much?’ Hope repeated. ‘Pretty much what?’

‘That’s a boy band, silly. You’ve never heard of Pretty Much?’

‘No, I was more of a One Direction kind of girl. I used to imagine that Harry Styles would show up at my high school and whisk me away.’

‘He’s ancient’ Lucy declared unequivocally.

Hope chuckled. 

‘There is this boy at school I like. His name is Matthew Renwick’ Lucy admitted in a fit of honesty. ‘But don’t tell Rhonda, she’ll make fun of me.’

‘My lips are sealed’ Hope promised.

There was silence for a minute or two and Hope began to feel sleep tugging at her consciousness.

‘Sometimes I put my face in my pillow and do this’ Lucy said, pushing her face into her pillow and mimicking a prolonged kiss, her face contorted and her head shaking from side to side.

‘Do you think that’s stupid’ she asked, coming up for air.

‘No, I don’t think it’s stupid.’

‘I thought I was the only one who ever did that’ the girl said.

‘No chance. Every girl does that.’ 

‘Do you kiss Cam like that?’

Hope was taken aback by the question. ‘You know what Lucy? One thing you should never do is kiss and tell. How about we get some sleep and maybe tomorrow after school, you can take me to the stables and introduce me properly to Cinnamon.’

‘Okay’ Lucy said with a sigh. ‘Goodnight Hope.’

WCWCWC

Neal and Caitlin were lying in wait for Jesse to return. Neal could tell Caitlin was hoping against hope that there was some sort of innocent explanation for her brother’s behaviour: an explanation other than the fact that he was a weasel and a hustler who’d been toying with her emotions.

They’d arranged for Caitlin to sit in the dining room, out of sight, so she could listen in on the conversation when Jesse finally got there and in the meantime, the two of them sat and nibbled on the remnants of some homemade chocolate chip cookies and a glass of milk. 

‘What kind of things did you steal?’ the curious teen asked.

Neal was visibly uncomfortable with the question. ‘Just… things. It didn’t matter, really. I was just addicted to the feeling I got whenever I could get away with something. I was young and I… well, I didn't always think things through. It wasn't always planned, sometimes I would just take advantage of a given situation.’

He reflected on what he’d just said; wasn't that exactly what Jesse had done?

‘Look, I know you and Jesse haven't had an easy life but I just want you to know there’s a better way’ he added.

Caitlin nodded and took a bite of her cookie. ‘I’m sorry I said all those nasty things to you’ she said quietly.

Neal placed his hand on hers and squeezed. ‘What nasty things?’ he said with a mischievous grin.

The sound of the front door was heard in the distance and Neal brought his finger to his lips and winked at Caitlin as he got to his feet.

TBC


	29. Chapter 29

Liam put down his phone and stretched out on the bed. The prospect of having lunch with his sister brought a smile to his lips. The last few days had been rough, not only did he have a huge exam coming up but things were heating up on the basketball court and he’d been trying to curtail his social outings to keep from bumping into Todd Greenway. He had no regrets about his decision to break it off with the flamboyant young man and yet he missed him - he missed his laughter and his enthusiasm, to say nothing of his perfect bubble butt. 

‘So, why is she in Watertown?’ Josh repeated a second time. ‘Hello? Earth to Liam?’

‘What? Sorry, what did you say?’

‘I asked what your sister was doing in Watertown.’

‘She’s visiting her boyfriend’s family. Actually, he’s her fiancé.’

‘How old is she, anyway?’ Josh asked.

‘She’s turning twenty-four in March’ Liam answered although it was obvious his mind was on other things. 

It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out where Liam’s head was at but Josh persevered, trying to keep his buddy’s mind focussed on something other than his recent breakup.

‘Have you two always been close?’

Liam glanced over in his direction. ‘What?’

‘I said have you two always been close? You really need to get your hearing checked, buddy.’

‘Yeah, yeah’ Liam replied absentmindedly. ‘Ever since her accident, we’ve been even closer.’

‘What happened?’

‘Almost four years ago, she was home from university for study break and she got hit by a car in front of my dad’s school.’

‘Wow! Was it bad?’

Liam nodded. ‘Real bad. She was in a coma for weeks and she suffered some brain damage and had a bunch of broken bones, her pelvis, her leg, her clavicle, some bruised ribs. She was a mess. She was in the hospital for five months.’

‘That’s rough.’

‘Tell me about it! It really shook up our whole entire family. I think she’s still doing speech therapy.’

Liam refrained from sharing what was probably the most significant repercussion of Hope’s accident: his dad’s fall from grace. Instead, he remained focussed on Hope and her recovery.

‘She’s amazing… she’s so strong. She’s a lot like my mom. But she had to quit school and it’s taken her all this time to heal properly. She still has one surgery to go - something to do with her eyes I think… you know plastic surgery.’

‘That must have been so scary.’

Liam nodded. ‘It was. At first, we weren’t even sure she was going to make it. We didn't know how the brain injury would play out. In the end, she practically had to learn to talk all over again. But it brought us a lot closer together and she has this terrific guy in her life so that helps.’

Liam had been sitting up on the edge of the bed as he told the tale. He let himself fall back on his pillow and grabbed a book, intent on doing a little reading before turning in for the night.

‘So, when do I get to meet her?’ Josh asked.

Liam’s mind was already wandering once again.

‘All right, I give up, Caffrey!’ Josh said loudly intent on getting Liam’s attention. ‘Is this about Todd?’

‘What? No!’ Liam said, a little too quickly.

‘Well, maybe a little’ he admitted after Josh stared him down. ‘I didn’t think I’d miss him this much.’ 

‘Breaking up is tough even when you’re the one who initiated it. And I get it, the guy sure knew how to fill a room.’

Liam chuckled. Todd was definitely a big personality: big hair, big voice, big presence. And his sudden absence had left a gaping hole in his life. Since their last tête-à-tête, Todd had managed to respect Liam’s wishes and stay away. They’d bumped into each other twice, in class, and on both occasions, Liam had managed to steer away from him and sit across the room so neither one of them would be tempted to stare at the other. Despite that, it had been painfully awkward and he knew it was especially hard on Todd, considering the breakup hadn't been his idea in the first place. Just to add to the drama, he’d heard from one of their mutual friends that Todd was in a funk, depressed and withdrawn, since they’d parted ways.

‘Just try to remember why you broke up with him in the first place’ Josh reminded him. ‘All that annoying stuff that used to drive you crazy, how he’d show up unannounced and how he’d call you hotcakes in front of everybody and totally embarrass you. Let’s face it, the guy had no filter. He was not the guy for you.’

‘I know’ Liam sighed. ‘Just for the record, it was hotstuff not hotcakes - that’s what they serve at McDonalds, you goof.’

Josh laughed. ‘Whatever. It used to drive you nuts.’

‘Well… I kinda miss it at the moment’ Liam grudgingly admitted.

‘I could start calling you that if it makes you feel better’ Josh said, blowing Liam a kiss.  
Liam reached over for his sneaker by the side of the bed and threw it in the direction of his roomie, practically hitting him in the head.

‘Hey, watch it!’ Josh said, throwing it back. ‘Just don’t go wallowing in self-pity. If you give this guy even a nod or a smile, he’ll be back pestering you and you’ll never get rid of him. Just… ride it out, Caffrey. Anyway, we’ve got another away game on the weekend, that should help you stay focussed.’

‘Yeah, right… focussed’ Liam repeated listlessly.

WCWCWC

Jesse Davis tiptoed into the darkened house and made his way to the family room, his temporary digs, intent on pulling open the hide-a-bed and crawling in under the sheets. It was late and he was exhausted. But more than anything, he was pleased as punch with the little transaction he’d just completed with Frankie Catalano. It had been an easy payday and if he could find his way back into the Raphael after hours, he'd be looking at another few thousand bucks to line his pockets before he finally left New York for good. 

He’d need Caitlin for that little caper but he was pretty confident that she could be manipulated and if his luck held up, he anticipated an easy score. Sure, she’d be angry and disappointed when his duplicity finally came to light but he was pretty sure that, with time, she’d see things his way; after all, they were blood relatives and nothing was more important than family.

He was relieved to find the house quiet. It seemed everyone was in bed which suited him just fine. He wasn't in the mood for another lecture or a confrontation with the man of the house. He found Neal Caffrey to be a royal pain in the ass: principled, haughty, arrogant, holier-than-thou — pretty well everything Jesse despised in a human being. He hadn't appreciated the way the man had stood up to him, threatening him like he had. But Jesse felt things were under control now that he’d hinted he was prepared to share the explosive information about Neal’s past with his sweet, innocent foster daughter. He’d known men like that before; in the end, their ego and their pride always stood in the way. They could talk the talk but when push came to shove, he had no doubt Caffrey would cave, keeping his mouth shut about Jesse - anything to protect the lily-white image he’d cultivated for the benefit of his foster daughter. Either way, he only needed to hang on a couple of more days; soon, he’d be in the wind with his bank account nicely padded until his next gig. 

He reached over to turn on the lamp and let out a loud gasp as he spotted Neal sitting there in a nearby armchair with a grin on his face. 

‘What the fuck!’ he shouted. ‘You just about gave me a freakin’ heart attack. What are you doing, sitting here in the dark?’ 

Neal stared back, his hands on the chair’s armrests, looking perfectly composed. ‘I was just… meditating’ he said with a mischievous look in his eyes.

‘Well, you should give a guy some warning if you’re going to sneak up on him.’

Neal smiled glibly; he had the guy just where he wanted him: flustered and vulnerable.

Jesse threw his jacket on a nearby chair and began to remove his shoes, throwing them in the corner of the room.

‘What?’ he said arrogantly as he looked at Neal sitting there, motionless. ‘You just gonna sit there and watch me strip?’

Neal smiled, self-assured. ‘I’ve been sitting here wondering if you were coming back to get your stuff.’ 

‘Why?’ Jesse said with a goading smile. ‘I’m not going anywhere.’

‘I told you, you had two days to get your shit together and get out of my house.’

Jesse stared back, defiant. ‘And I told you I’d leave when I was good and ready.’

Neal crossed his legs, a sign he wasn't going anywhere and he rested his hands across his chest. ‘Well, apparently you didn't get the memo. It’s time you leave Caitlin alone. She’s been through enough.’

‘Caitlin is just fine. She’s tough. And I told you, she’s not going to believe a word you say once I tell her that you’re nothing but some lowlife, common criminal.’

‘It takes one…’ Neal began, trying to remain calm.

Jesse took out a wad of cash from his jeans pocket and threw it on the bed, returning to the job of undressing. He pulled off his sweater.

‘So, I see you had a productive night’ Neal said. 

Jesse laughed. ‘You could say that.’

‘So Frankie liked those Cartier cufflinks, huh?’ Neal said, his voice steady. 

For the first time since he’d walked in, Jesse flinched and his smile disappeared momentarily.

‘And I hear you made a killing with my wife’s pearl earrings, my wedding gift to her by the way. I have to say, you’ve got a discriminating eye, those things cost me a fortune.’

‘I don’t know what you’re talking about’ Jesse said, looking away.

‘Oh no? What, you think I won’t turn you in?’

‘I think you’ve got some weird twisted saviour complex and you’re prepared to take a hit so Caitlin can keep thinking the sun shines out of your ass. I think you’ll do just about anything to keep your image intact… Mr C’ he said with arrogance. 

‘You’re wrong’ Neal stated with a mocking smile. ‘I think you underestimate just how much those cufflinks meant to me…’

Jesse laughed menacingly. ‘Fine. Why don’t you turn me in then and I’ll just go upstairs and get Caitlin so we can tell her all about your secret life as a conman and a criminal informant for the FBI.’

‘Ex conman’ Neal corrected flippantly as he got to his feet. ‘And Caitlin doesn’t care about that.’

‘I doubt that very much. She’s put you on a pedestal and you don't strike me as the type who takes very kindly to being thrown off your perch. Too much of a do-gooder, too… narcissistic. Caitlin will be furious when she finds out you kept this from her. She’s got you pegged as a martyr, the guy who saved her. Right… some martyr! I didn't know they had a cell block for saints at Sing Sing.’

‘Look, Jesse. Here’s the thing’ Neal began with feigned patience. ‘Caitlin is part of our family. I love her and I’d do just about anything to keep her safe and happy. And that includes keeping her away from a scumbag like you. No matter what. You used her to worm your way into our home, you sat at my table and ate my food, you stole from me and now, you’re planning on stealing from my gallery, maybe even some of your own sister’s art - all so you can make a few lousy bucks.’

Jesse continued to stare defiantly as Neal spoke.

‘But you know when all is said and done, I really don’t care about any of that. All I really care about is Caitlin. When you finally decide you’ve used her enough and you walk away, you’re going to leave her disillusioned and hurt, all because she was too trusting to see what was right in front of her face. And Sara and I will be left to pick up the pieces because you’ll be onto your next mark… because that’s all she’s ever been to you, a mark.’

‘She’ll never believe you’ Jesse said, taunting him. ‘Blood is thicker than… happy foster families.’

‘You know what, Jesse. Both you and Caitlin had a rough childhood, I’ll grant you that. You had a mom who struggled with alcohol and drugs, you were kicked around the foster care system like a football, you had to adapt to a new home every few years… and none of that is right. Believe me, I know all about it. But there’s a fundamental difference between you and Caitlin. You decided to let your heart turn to stone and to steal from a system you thought had robbed you of everything. But Caitlin, she’s a loving, caring soul and she chose to open up her heart, to give life a chance and she’s going to go on and do amazing things with her life while you sit back and rot in jail.’

Jesse was shaking his head as Neal spoke. ‘Again, point, game, match to me’ he said, calmly. ‘I think you’re bluffing. Once Caitlin finds out the truth about you, how you lied to her and deceived her, she’ll spit on you and she’ll never want to have anything to do with you again.’

‘You don’t know your sister at all, do you?’ Neal said with self-assurance.

A sound was heard coming from the kitchen and Caitlin appeared in the doorframe, staring at the two men.

‘C-C-Caitlin!’ Jesse said, stepping forward in an effort to salvage the situation. ‘Are you all right?’

She ignored him and started walking towards Neal in silence.

‘I was worried about you’ Jesse said. ‘Caitlin, I found out some stuff about this guy… you really need to know.’

Caitlin kept on walking, stopping as she reached Neal. She tucked her arm around his back and he brought his arm around her shoulder, holding her steady.

‘I can’t believe you did this, Jess’ she said, her voice trembling. ‘I trusted you, I vouched for you and you lied to me… you used me.’

‘What are you talking about, sis? This guy’s a phoney, he’s been lying to you since the day you met him. He’s a conman, that’s what he does for a living and he’s conning you right now.’

Caitlin took a shaky breath. ‘You have no idea what Mr. C and Sara have done for me. They took me in after I’d been horrible to them, they gave me everything, food, shelter, clothes, spending money, everything I needed. They treated me like a daughter and they never asked for anything in return. And still, I kept acting out, pushing them away, daring them to throw me out… and they wouldn't do it. They just wouldn't give up on me.’

Neal stood in silence, watching her face as tears streamed down her cheeks.

Jesse stepped forward, his arms extended. ‘Come on Caitlin, he’s nothing to you, just some do-gooder who’s trying to manipulate you. I’m your brother. You and I, we’re two peas in a pod.’

Caitlin gasped. ‘Mr C’s right, I’m nothing like you. You go right ahead, ruin your life if you want to. But you’re not ruining mine’ she said, looking up at Neal. ‘And you’re not hurting my family. Not anymore.’

Neal squeezed her shoulder. 

‘Get out of our house, Jesse. I don't want you here’ Caitlin cried.

‘Come on sis, you don't mean that. You and I… we’re family. These people, they don’t know us.’

‘What are you talking about? I hear from you once a year, a phone call. Sara and Mr. C… they’ve been there for me every single day for the past five years. They were there when I was messed up on drugs, when I was sick, when I was angry, when I was sad. They pick up the pieces when Mom pops into my life every few months and tries to mess it up. They were there when I graduated from high school and I know they’ll be there when I graduate from university and Mr. C will walk me down the aisle someday and hold my babies in his arms and they’ll call him grandpa. That’s what family is Jess.’

Neal felt his heart swell at the sudden outpouring of emotion from his foster daughter, saying things he'd never heard her say before. 

Caitlin took a deep intake of air and turned to look at Neal. ‘Please make him leave, Mr. C’ she moaned as she buried her face in his chest.

‘You heard what she said’ Neal said, looking at Jesse with daggers in his eyes. ‘Take your goddamn blood money and get the hell out of my house and don’t ever come back.’

He cradled Caitlin in his arms, her face still snuggled against his chest. He could feel her trembling, the sobs beginning to take root.

Jesse had been staring ahead in shock but now that Neal had spoken, he began to move, grabbing his belongings and throwing them into his bag. It took but a moment to pull everything together and then he was standing right in front of them, leaning in to speak to his sister.

‘You’re making a big mistake, Caitlin’ he murmured. ‘These people will never know you the way I do.’

Neal stared him down and Jesse turned to leave. Neal could feel Caitlin’s body shaking against him as he watched the young man leave.

Jesse got to the front door, noticing Sara sitting on the second step, face in her hands. He glared at her, opened the door and slammed it shut behind him.

WCWCWC

Sara had been waiting upstairs for Neal to come to bed. After he and Caitlin had talked things out and they’d all had dinner, the two of them had discussed how things would play out when Jesse eventually returned.

After Mozzie’s phone call, Sara had decided to make herself scarce and had crawled up to bed to wait for Neal to finish dealing with the situation. She knew this had the makings of an explosive confrontation but this was between Caitlin and Neal and she needed to take a step back and let them handle things as they saw fit. 

Nonetheless, she was still inquisitive Sara Ellis, insurance investigator, and fierce, protective mamma bear and when she’d heard the front door open and the sound of voices floating from downstairs, she’d tiptoed down the stairs, perching on the second step from the bottom with her ears attuned to what was happening in the family room.

Even though she had no sightline into the family room from where she sat, she could hear everything and she could easily imagine Neal’s face with every word he spoke. The way his eyes danced when he was being cocky, the tension in his jaw as he grew passionate about what he was saying, the fire in his bright blue eyes when he was defending someone he loved. As the confrontation wore on, she remained on high alert for any signs that the discussion was deteriorating and might devolve into acts of aggression — from either man. Neal wasn't a violent man, far from it, but he was human and if he was pushed, he would retaliate, that much she knew. More worrisome was the prospect that Jesse might physically attack Neal or worse yet, pull out the gun she knew he was carrying. 

As the war of words escalated, she fought with herself to keep from barging in and interrupting. It was obvious Caitlin wasn't in the room - which meant she was hiding somewhere, listening in just like she was - and Sara regretted not having stayed behind to be with her while she listened in on the nasty confrontation. 

The words were harsh, the accusations bitter on both sides and she could only imagine how her foster daughter must be feeling as she listened to the two men she loved arguing, knowing that sooner or later she would have to side with one of them and renounce the other. Not that Sara had any doubt that Caitlin would eventually come to see the truth about her brother; it was inevitable. But still, hearing the betrayal from his very own lips would leave her wounded and she prayed that she and Neal would be up to the task of putting her back together again.

She’d cringed when she’d heard Jesse taunting Neal, accusing him of lying to Caitlin and conning her. She knew that would hurt Neal most of all and that he would worry Caitlin might believe Jesse’s twisted lies. Sara could hear the emotion in Neal’s voice as he spoke and she feared that, once this was over and done with, Caitlin might not be the only one who would need to be put back together again. 

When Sara heard Caitlin’s voice and realized the young woman had joined the conversation, she’d held her breath. She’d immediately picked up on the hurt and disappointment in her voice and she hadn't been able to keep from smiling as she heard Caitlin describe what her foster parents meant to her. The sound of Caitlin sobbing had tugged at her heartstrings and she could only imagine Neal with his arm wrapped around their girl, holding her up as she began to fall apart. 

The sound of Caitlin’s shaky voice as she’d asked Jesse to leave had been heartbreaking. Not only was she asking him to leave the house, she was also banishing him from her life for the foreseeable future. No matter how angry and hurt she was with him, the loss would be devastating for the young woman who’d already lost so much.

Sara waited patiently for the conversation to wind down so she could go in and put her arms around Caitlin, around Neal, to let them know she was there for them and that they would get through this together. 

As a family. 

Like they always did.

TBC


	30. Chapter 30

It was the wee small hours of the morning by the time the home’s occupants finally made it up to bed. No one had been in a rush to call it a night as they all debriefed from the intense emotions of the last few hours.

The Caffreys had taken their time, talking Caitlin down, helping her come to terms with her brother’s betrayal - a man who, up to this point, she had tended to idolize.

‘I knew he wasn't an angel’ she’d said between heart wrenching sobs. ‘But I had no idea he’d stoop so low… or that he’d use me like that.’

Neal could have told her that crime was a potent drug and when you caught the bug it was a never ending cycle; the attraction was practically impossible to resist. He’d been there himself, maybe a little more refined in his methods but nonetheless, the result had been just the same.

Caitlin had cried until she was all cried out and Sara had sat up with her in bed, rubbing her back like she used to do when Hope and Liam were little. She’d finally fallen asleep, exhausted. 

Neal was pulling on a pair of silk sleep pants when Sara joined him in their bedroom.

‘She okay?’ he asked.

‘She’s finally asleep.’

Neal let himself fall on the edge of the bed with a thud. ‘That was an awful lot for one person to process all at once.’

He ran his hands through his hair and began rubbing his temples, the tension finally getting to him. Sara crawled up against the headboard and opened her arms to him. He instantly curled up in her loving embrace, his head cradled against her chest. He let out a plaintive moan.

‘Awww, that feels good’ he sighed as she ran her hand through his thick head of hair.

‘You’ve got to start taking better care of yourself Caffrey’ she murmured.

His arms reached around her waist as he snuggled closer, closing his eyes and melting into the embrace.

‘You smell good’ he murmured as she chuckled.

‘That was quite the rollercoaster ride… for both of you.’

Neal grew quiet and she could feel the tension in his body as he clung to her.

‘Are you all right sweetie?’ she finally asked in response to his silence.

He pulled away and looked her in the eye, his face as serious as she’d ever seen it. 

‘There’s something I need to tell you’ he announced, his gaze steady. ‘I came really close to having a drink today.’

She stared back, her mouth hanging open. Four years after the fact, she didn't think much about the daily effort that might be required for Neal to abstain from drinking — mostly because she didn't think it was that much of a struggle for him anymore. Obviously, she’d underestimated just how difficult it was for him to resist — or at least how difficult it had been in this particular situation. 

Neal settled back into her arms; either he was embarrassed to look her in the eye or he needed the solace of her loving embrace - or maybe a little of both. 

‘After Caitlin left me at Mel’s… I sat there for a while and I got to feeling sorry for myself.’

Sara ran her hand through his hair and he let out a soft sigh.

‘Next thing I knew’ he whispered. ‘I was asking Sonia to bring me a double scotch.’

Sara didn’t say a word, just held him, her breathing steady. 

‘I sat there for… I don’t know how long, inhaling it, bringing the glass up to my lips… willing my hand not to tip the liquid into my mouth. I wanted it, Sara. I really, really wanted it.’

The room was deathly quiet except for the sound of their breathing. ‘I kept thinking how good it would feel to just let go, abandon myself for a little while. Then I thought about you. How I’d promised I’d check in with you before I did it… before I gave in and had a drink. And I thought about that night… the night you threw me out of the house. How lost I felt, how alone.’

He pulled away momentarily, looking at her and placing his hand on her cheek. ‘I never… ever want to feel that lost and desperate again.’

Sara could feel her chest tightening and she swallowed. 

‘I called Peter and I walked out of the diner. I just left the drink there on the table’ he recounted. ‘But Sara I came so close to giving in.’

She seemed to exhale, the tension leaving her body. ‘But you didn't.’

He shook his head, dejected. ‘No, but… it could have gone either way there for a minute and that’s what scared me, the fact that I would even consider doing such a thing when I know what’s at stake.’

Sara’s hands cradled his face, forcing him to look into her eyes. ‘Honey, you’re stronger than you think. There was a time when you wouldn't have been able to walk away.’

He nodded sadly. ‘Yeah, I know but… that feeling, that… almost uncontrollable urge. It was so powerful. It was almost more than I could control.’

‘Neal, maybe you’re reading too much into it. Maybe you could have a drink without… losing control. You know what Jim told you, how some people can learn to drink socially after they recover.’

‘This wasn't social drinking Sara’ he said. ‘I’d been feeling so in control lately but this… I wasn't expecting this at all. It was like… watching myself prepare to jump off a cliff in slow motion.’

Sara sat up and reached for his hand. When next he spoke, his voice was shaky. 

‘Babe, I never want to lose you.’

‘You’re not going to lose me, Neal. Never. Slipping up… it happens. And you’ve been… you’ve been perfect since you gave it up. Don’t be so hard on yourself.’

‘I just don’t trust myself around booze anymore. That’s the sad truth. When we had the party on New Year’s Eve… it wasn't that much of an effort. It usually isn't any more but… that feeling I had in the diner when my emotions were all over the map… I’m just not sure I’d be able to stop after one drink.’

‘You don’t know that honey. Not for sure.’

Neal shook his head. He got up off the bed and walked over to the dresser, pretending to fiddle with something - most certainly a diversion tactic. Sara wasn't letting him off the hook, she came up behind him, her arms reaching around his waist to envelop him, her head against his back, breathing quietly.

‘It’s just not worth the risk’ he said, his voice quiet.

‘That’s entirely up to you, sweetie. But I believe in you. You’ve always been there for me and the kids.’

He spun around and her arms fell away. There was guilt in his eyes. ‘That’s not true, after Hope’s accident, I wasn't there for you for the longest time’ he said, his voice full of regret.

‘Of course you were. You were hurting, I know that. Honey, why do you set such impossibly high standards for yourself? Nobody expects you to be perfect. Wasn't this whole thing with Caitlin proof enough? She loves you and she’s willing to accept your… imperfections. And so am I.’

Neal shook it off. It was as if suddenly, it was all too painful to talk about. He lifted a pair of cufflinks off the dresser and showed them to Sara. ‘I can’t believe he pawned those Cartier cufflinks.’

Sara scoffed. She could see what he was doing, steering the conversation away from the painful subject. She indulged him. 

‘Oh, my pearl earrings - the ones you gave me on our wedding day - are stolen and all you can moan about are the cufflinks some rich old broad gave you while you were busy playing gigolo.’

Neal frowned. ‘Gigolo? Oooh honey, you make it sound so… sordid’ he said playfully.

‘From what Mozzie told me, it was sordid’ she said, her voice reproachful. ‘You wined and dined her for weeks before you conned her out of all her jewelry and most of her valuable art.’

Neal brought his hands to rest on her hips and gave her a blistering conman smile, seemingly pleading for forgiveness for the incident that had taken place before he'd even met her. 

‘It feels like a lifetime ago.’

Sara shook her head in desperation and sighed loudly; he would never be able to fully escape his bad boy image, no matter how many years passed. 

‘And she wasn't all that old’ he added, pushing his luck.

Sara’s face grew serious. ‘Why don’t you make an appointment to see Jim, talk things out? It might do you good to talk about how you’ve been feeling.’

He shrugged; maybe he was due for a ‘tune up’ with his addiction counsellor. 

Suddenly, all he wanted was to forget all the nonsense: the insecurities, the doubts, the sadness, the exhaustion, the worries. Up until a few months ago, Neal would have smoothed all those rough edges by losing himself in Sara’s arms, her legs, her lips, her breasts. These days, he wasn't sure he was up to the task. He couldn't even remember the last time they'd had honest to goodness sex - weeks, maybe a couple of months. Sure, there’d been the usual cuddling, kissing, hugging, the sweet whispers but he'd been holding back when it came to sexual intimacy, afraid he wouldn’t be able to go all the way. 

He grew dejected at the thought and he turned away from her and climbed back into bed.

She followed suit and curled up against him, sensing his hopelessness. After a few moments of silence, she began to place butterfly kisses along his bare chest, letting her hand linger up and down his side. Neal squirmed in response. There was no denying her touch felt amazing but abandoning himself to her advances meant allowing himself be vulnerable and perhaps coming up short — something Neal Caffrey could not abide.

‘You want to try?’ she murmured, sounding more like a therapist than his loving wife and sex partner.

When had their sex life become so complicated, he wondered. They’d never needed to talk about it before; it just was. Now it was discussed, analyzed, scrutinized, dissected, coddled, nurtured and he hated not feeling in control of his own body’s reactions. He wanted nothing more than to dive in head first as he always had, propelled by his love for his wife, his vigorous sexual urges and his unfailing man parts. 

Well, he supposed, two out of three wasn't bad.

He turned towards her, placing a probing kiss on her warm, inviting lips. With everything happening in their busy lives and his current reluctance to test the limits of his sexual prowess, he realized just how much he'd been missing their usual level of intimacy these past few weeks. The feel of her lips on his, so soft, so soothing… despite the fatigue, he deepened the kiss, his hands beginning their familiar exploration of her supple body.

They made out for a while, soft moaning morphing into louder moaning as Sara finally took things up a notch by straddling Neal’s hips, eliciting a gasp from his lips as the direct stimulation was felt reverberating throughout his whole body. She reached up and yanked off the t-shirt she’d thrown on just moments before and with a quivering breath, his hands slid up the side of her body and settled on the underside of her breasts, his thumbs kneading the soft skin as he sighed. He leaned forward and skimmed the tip of her nipple, first with his nose, then letting his lips settle there, enjoying the way Sara’s hips began to roll, grinding up against him and intensifying the pleasant sensation for both of them. 

His mouth continued to poke and pull, his teeth teasing at her and Sara leaned forward, crowding him and further intensifying the tingling sensation that had now taken over every inch of her body. The sensation of his hands, his mouth, his teeth, it all felt amazing and Sara pulled away briefly to get look a look at his eyes, noticing them growing darker with desire. He’d been holding back for weeks now and she missed that familiar look of pure lust which, sadly, had been missing in action during his self-imposed hiatus. 

With his hands now free to explore, Neal brought his arms around her back, letting them wander down to her hips and finally, cupping her butt as she wriggled on his lap, making him acutely aware of his growing arousal. But getting it up had never been the problem; lately, it had all been about staying in the game until the last quarter and, despite the delightful stimulation, Neal could feel himself start to fade as his overactive mind began to win the battle against his more basic instincts. He tried to push the qualms away but, alas, he'd already begun to fall into the trap of doubt and apprehension his mind had set for him. 

‘You good?’ Sara asked breathlessly as she continued to grind away.

He did his best to cover up but being intimate with the same woman for almost thirty years had its drawbacks and Sara seemed to pick up on his slight hesitation.

‘Uh, huh’ he murmured in an effort to conceal his misgivings for fear of bringing the proceedings to a premature halt. In the end, he might come up short but there was no reason his wife couldn't enjoy herself.

Neal Caffrey hadn't become a world class conman without developing some pretty amazing deflection skills and he decided his best bet was to divert from the unfortunate turn of events by going on the offensive. He gave her a lustful smile and pushed her off him, Sara landing on her back with a soft thud as he continued to ravage her mouth. He continued to let his hands wander, reaching down to the edge of the yoga pants she was still wearing and tugging at them insistently. She was more than happy to assist in their removal and, without hesitation, he began exploring her now naked thigh, groping, squeezing, inching closer to that spot between her legs, teasing at her before settling there on his mission.

Sara let out a soft plaintive moan and he grinned, pleased with her all too predictable reaction; it seemed she was already halfway there. Despite the distraction of what her oh so thoughtful husband was doing with his magic hands, she managed to bring her hand to the edge of his sleep pants in an effort to return the favour but Neal tensed, resisting her efforts. Instead, he continued with his rather successful diversion technique and she gave in without much of a fight, overcome by the sensation of his amazing digits performing their usual magic. Her heavy lidded eyes opened a crack as she reached up to cradle his face and she let out a loud moan as he smiled back in satisfaction. 

‘Babe…’ he murmured with a mischievous smile. 

The sound of his deep, husky voice sent a shiver down her spine, settling in her lady parts and he felt her shiver. 

Her hands moved to grab his hair, pulling him in closer and bringing her mouth to his ear as she began to pant loudly. 

‘Neal…’ she pleaded breathlessly. ‘Neal… awwww… awwwww…’

The unconstrained tugging on his soft curls was par for the course and Neal readily put up with the forceful and somewhat painful yanking, more than happy to witness his wife start to come apart under his expert touch. It was as if she was a finely tuned instrument and he, the skilled musician whose hands caressed her, aroused her, making her body sing and finally explode in a primal burst of expletives before it quieted and fell into a boneless heap upon the messy sheets. 

It was an art, really, and yet so predictable after years of shared intimacy. He loved watching her morph from the earnest and rather unassuming insurance investigator she was by day into a lustful, uninhibited, self-indulgent vixen, oblivious to the attention her loud moaning might elicit from others in the house. Inevitably, her breathing would grow ragged, her eyes would roll back in her head, her chest would heave, her hips would stutter erratically and she’d begin to make those delightful moaning sounds, followed by the cursing one might expect from a drunken sailor rather than a woman as refined as Sara Ellis. 

He watched her face grow tense and her body begin to convulse and he leaned down to capture her nipple between his teeth, tugging and biting forcefully as the inevitable cursing began. As was often the case, that was all she needed to push her right over the edge.

‘Fuck… Neal’ she moaned - at least that’s what it sounded like.

The rest of her litany was incoherent gibberish - at least it was to him - but there was no doubt as to the release it brought and he felt her body go limp, her arms falling away and finally releasing his sensitive scalp.

She continued her laboured breathing and forced her eyes open. ‘You do it to me every time Caffrey’ she murmured, bringing her hands up to cup his face. 

She placed a long, lingering kiss on his lips and sat up, pushing him off her and without hesitation, her mouth headed in the general direction of the edge of his sleep pants, tugging once again with insistent hands and placing small kisses all the way down his chest. She immediately noticed he was at half mast, something she was more than willing to help remedy but before she could get a handle on the situation, his hands were on her, forcibly tugging her back up to face him.

He prided himself on knowing her inside and out, understanding full well that the reverse was also true. No matter how hard he might try to camouflage his unease at his perceived lack of sexual prowess, she would be well aware of it.

‘Come on honey’ she pleaded as she gazed at him, that relaxed, almost drunk post-orgasmic look in her eyes. ‘It’s me… just let me try…’

Watching her thrash around on their old mattress had been more than enough to get him going but, once again, fear of failure won out over his fleeting arousal and he brought his lips to her forehead, placing a chaste kiss there before falling onto his back and bringing her along with him. 

‘Naw… I’m good’ he murmured, pulling her close. ‘Really.’

‘Neal, this is ridiculous’ she began before realizing it was the worst thing she could have possibly said. He wasn't being ridiculous, he was just proud and labelling his feelings as silly only served to disparage them even more. 

‘I’m sorry’ she murmured as he squeezed her shoulder.

’S’okay’ he whispered back.

She was more than willing to go the extra mile to give him the same release she’d just experienced but she gave in to his emphatic rebuff and she curled up against his chest, unwilling to further humiliate him by pushing the issue any further - or, heaven forbid, forcing herself on him. 

‘I love you Neal’ she murmured in the darkness of the room.

‘Love you’ he replied, his voice quiet.

Despite her best efforts at cuddling, it took but a few minutes to give in to the inevitable fatigue; it had been a long, emotional day and Sara felt sleep tugging at her consciousness as she finally surrendered - her body satiated and relaxed. 

Sara’s breathing began to even out and Neal’s thoughts wandered unexpectedly to Randall Piper. The thought of Sara’s ex seemed to bring on a fresh new wave of self doubt and irrational insecurities. 

As she snored gently in the crook of his arm, he began to wonder if the obscenely rich man had ever had trouble making love to any of his wives. 

WCWCWC

‘Hope! Hope!’

It was still dark in the bedroom as the young girl hovered over the darker haired woman, fully dressed and apparently ready to go.

‘Mom says if you want her to make breakfast for you before she drives us to school, you have to get up now. It’s scrambled eggs, homemade strawberry jam and Texas toast.’

Hope forced her eyes open. ‘Lucy?’ she groaned. ‘What time is it?’

‘It’s 7:30. We’re getting ready to leave for school.’

Hope brought her pillow over her head in an act of defiance and moaned. 

‘No, I’m good’ she said, her voice muffled.

‘Okay, I’ll be home at 4, do you want to go riding when I get back?’

Hope peeked out from underneath her pillow. ‘You go horse riding in the dead of winter?’ she asked.

Lucy laughed. ‘Of course, silly. Riding horses isn't like waterskiing. You can do it all year round.’

Hope sat up in bed, groggy. ‘Sure. We can go riding when you get home.’

The young girl sauntered out of the room as Hope closed her eyes, trying without much luck to recapture her previous blissful state of unconsciousness. There was a ruckus downstairs, footsteps, voices, generally a lot of activity and within minutes, the noise died down, leaving nothing but deafening silence in the unfamiliar house. Hope forced herself out of bed and walked barefoot to the bathroom only to find the door closed and the shower running. She blinked a few times to bring the schedule into focus, noticing that this was Owen Armstrong’s time slot and she tiptoed back towards the bedroom to wait for him to finish up. She lay in bed squirming for a few minutes, feeling a growing urge to use the toilet. She was about to give in and knock on the bathroom door when she remembered there was another toilet on the main floor. 

Hope crept down the stairs in her bare feet and cotton nightie, eager to finally relieve herself. The house was empty and she made her way to the small powder room, noticing how orderly everything was in the large country kitchen - not a thing out of place. On her way back, she wandered by the parlour and glanced in, recognizing a rather familiar lump under a mountain of blankets. A naughty smile crossed her lips and she glanced around, making sure no one was around. She made her way into the quiet room to find the love of her life, lying there, flat on his back, tangled up in the blankets with his arms flung over his head as he always did when he shared his bed with her. 

The rules were clear: no funny business in the house. But… was it really funny business if none of the kids were around to witness it? Hope decided it wasn't and she tiptoed over, gazing at Cam and noticing the way his dark blond curls were fanned out around his head like the crown on the Statue of Liberty. She giggled and without hesitation, lifted her sensible cotton nightshirt up to her waist and climbed onto Cam’s sleepy body, causing him to let out a surprised yelp.

‘What…’ he began, his eyes bleary.

‘Good morning’ she cooed sensuously as she splayed herself across his chest and gazed down lovingly at his face.

‘Hope…’ he murmured, his voice gravelly. His hands were instantly on her hips, keeping her in position. ‘This is a nice surprise —’

She cut him off with a kiss, a long, languorous kiss which he replied to with more of the same.

‘Mmmmm… definitely good morning’ she whispered suggestively.

‘How did you sleep?’ he asked, trying to refrain from too much physical contact.

There was something about being in his parents’ house that made him feel like he was a kid again, including the need to follow the rules. 

All the rules. 

He squirmed uncomfortably as Hope curled up in his arms, becoming acutely aware that he was responding to her warm, pliant body the way any normal, red blooded twenty-seven-year-old man might respond to the advances of the woman he loved.

‘Babe…’ he said, trying to sit up.

‘What?’ she cooed, her lips lingering on his neck.

‘We shouldn’t…’

‘Cameron Armstrong’ she mewled as she brought her face up to gaze into his eyes. ‘When did you become such a prude?’

‘I’m not a —’

She cut him off again with another blistering kiss, this time letting her hand wander down to cup his privates. Cameron gasped. Despite his better judgement, he let his hands reach around her, pulling her closer.

‘Babe, not a good idea…’ he attempted with a shocking lack of sincerity.

Hope began nibbling on his ear, her hand wandering under the blankets.

‘How is this not a good idea?’ she asked, between frequent nibbles. ‘Your brother is up in the bathroom… everybody else is gone.’

‘But —’

‘Shut up’ Hope said as she sat up, straddling him. She pulled off her nightie and Cam’s mouth dropped as she sat there in all her glory, gazing down at him in nothing but a pair of undies.

She was back at it, moving the blankets out of the way and positioning herself over his strained boxer briefs. Her mouth went to kiss his nipple and he let out a loud gasp.

‘Hope…’ he moaned, half in protestation, half in delight. ‘Don’t…’

She continued with even more enthusiasm, her body firmly pressed against his. She was just about to reach down and pull off her panties when the sound of the back door was heard followed by a vague gush of cool air.

Hope grabbed for her nightie, bringing it up to cover herself as footsteps got closer. The two of them were sitting up, horrified, when the pretty young woman reached the doorway, standing there and staring back at them.

‘Well, well, well. What have we got here, big brother?’ she asked, her arms crossed and an amused look on her face.

Hope looked at Cameron and turned to back to stare at the newcomer once more. As introductions went, this one was a doozie and after a moment, Hope Ellis-Caffrey smiled and put out her hand. 

‘Hi. You…y-y-you must be Becky’ she said.

WCWCWC

Thursday’s first year business course was the one class Liam now dreaded - and not just because old man Driscoll was the driest, most boring professor he’d ever had. It was the class he shared with Todd Greenway and it had been tricky to avoid him completely since their recent breakup. 

Stepping into the large study hall, Liam was surprised to find that his ex wasn't in his usual seat - halfway up the room, by the window. He took his seat on the other side of the room where he could keep an eye on both doors as well as the professor. It was a primo spot: just close enough to hear the lecture but not so close he couldn’t peek at his phone or check his Facebook page without being found out. 

His mind wandered throughout the three hour class. He’d done the required reading the night before and ‘Droopy Driscoll’ as he was affectionately known, was simply regurgitating what Liam had clearly understood when he’d read the damn textbook in the first place. Instead, he thought about his lunch date with Hope the next day, it would be nice to spend some time with his sister, away from everybody else. He pondered the upcoming weekend trip to Boston to play the Terriers; they were second in their division and would be tough to beat. Time after time, his mind returned to the mystery of why Todd wasn't in class on this cold February day. Todd might be flighty in a lot of ways but he took his coursework seriously and Liam couldn't remember him ever missing a class since he’d first met him the previous fall.

By the time class let out, Liam had gone from curious to concerned to downright worried. Calling or texting Todd directly seemed like a bad idea so Liam decided he’d give his ex’s roommate a call to see what was up. He knew Mike Perry from another one of his classes and on the few occasion he’d bumped into him on campus.

The voice that answered sounded downright frantic and Liam didn't even have time to ask about his ex before the man spoke. 

‘Liam? I’m at the hospital with Todd’ he said, his voice shaky. ‘He tried to kill himself.’

TBC


	31. Chapter 31

Being out in the fresh country air seemed to have whet her appetite; at least that’s how Hope explained the fact that she was preparing to dive in for a third blueberry pancake from the impressive stack that sat in the middle of the table. Seemed that her future sister-in-law was an amazing cook as well as an excellent bookkeeper - not that she would be sharing that fact with her dad anytime soon. Neal fancied himself the undefeated champion when it came to flapjacks - it would be a shame to burst his bubble.

Hope sat next to Cameron, across from Becky and Fred Armstrong, trying to avoid the young woman’s probing gaze. She reached for the maple syrup, her hand colliding with Cameron’s who was doing the same. The pair giggled and looked up to see Cam’s dad staring back at them. It was a small blessing that they had been found bumping and grinding on the couch by Cam’s younger sister and not the morally upstanding Fred Armstrong. 

How was Hope to know that Becky and her dad went out at five every morning to do chores and returned to shower and have breakfast once everyone had left for school? To be fair, Cam had tried to warn her but he’d been somewhat distracted by Hope doing her best imitation of a stripper delivering a lap dance to get a word in edgewise. 

‘So, what are you young ‘uns up to today?’ Fred asked as he slurped his coffee noisily.

Hope smiled at his use of the term - it sounded like something out of a fifties’ western starring John Wayne.

‘We thought we’d go into town’ Cam said, bringing his hand to rest on top of his fiancée’s. ‘I want to show Hope where I went to school and where I played basketball. Maybe we’ll even pop in and visit old man Thurgood’ he said, his eyes bright with excitement.

Hope frowned. ‘He was my coach, best damn phys ed teacher I ever had.’

Fred cleared his throat, obviously disapproving of Cam’s use of profanity.

‘Darn…’ Cameron hastened to correct. ‘Best darn teacher I ever had.’

So much for being a grown man about to start a family of his own - six foot four Cameron Armstrong suddenly looked like a four-year-old being told off by his daddy for cussing. 

‘You know we still have the swear jar’ Becky said with a giggle.

Fred pointed to the kitchen counter where a jar sat, half full of bills. ‘And that’s just this month’ he said, despairingly.

‘Damn will cost you a buck, fuck is a fiver’ the young woman said with a wide grin.

‘Rebecca!’ Fred said, visibly unimpressed.

Cameron was eager to move on and change the subject. He turned back to look at Hope. ‘Then I’m going to take you to Ernie’s for lunch. They’ve got the best corned beef pizza you’ve ever tasted.’

She grimaced at the thought and Becky spoke up.

‘Good luck with that bro’ she announced with a glimmer in her eye. ‘Ernie’s closed last summer.’ 

Cameron dropped his fork onto his plate with a loud clang. ‘What do you mean closed? They can’t do that!’

Fred Armstrong laughed. ‘Of course they can. It’s some fancy shmancy bagel place now.’ He gestured with his hands. ‘Those things are as big as frisbees and as hard as a hockey pucks.’

‘Besides…’ Becky said. ‘Ernie is like a hundred years old. I’m surprised he’s still standing.’

Cameron looked more than a little disappointed at the news and Hope squeezed his hand in commiseration even though she was secretly relieved not to have to sample cured meat on a pizza pie. 

‘It’s okay’ she said. ‘I’m sure we can find somewhere else to eat. Anyway, we have to be back by four o’clock. I’m going riding with Lucy when she gets back from school.’

Becky chuckled. ‘Did she talk you into that? She's always looking for some poor sucker to go out with her in the freezing cold. Do you have something decent to wear to go riding?’

Hope blinked. ‘You mean… I need special clothes?’

Cameron, Fred and Becky shared an amused look. ‘It’s okay’ Becky volunteered. ‘We look about the same size, I’ve got you covered.’

Hope gave her future sister-in-law a demure smile. Considering the young woman had walked in on them doing the nasty, she had a pretty good idea exactly what size Hope was.

Fred was on his feet and he tapped his belly repeatedly, letting out a loud burp.

‘S'cuse me!’ he called out. ‘I’m going to hit the shower.’

He was gone in an instant, leaving the three young ‘uns to finish up. Hope looked over at Cameron then back across the table at Becky.

‘I’m s-s-sorry about earlier’ she stuttered, her eyes staring down at her plate. ‘Not exactly the first impression I was hoping to make.’

The young woman smiled, showing off a perfectly straight row of white teeth - just like her brother’s.

‘Don’t worry about it’ she said, her gaze turning deadly serious. ‘Just be thankful it was me and not Dad or you’d be sleeping out in the barn with the cows and the chickens for the rest of the week.’

Hope’s eyes grew in horror and Cameron tugged at her hand, forcing her to look at him.

‘She’s kidding!’ he said as he glared at his giggling sister.

‘What?’ Becky said. ‘Remember when Daddy made Jason Birchall sleep out in the shed that time he stayed over.’ 

‘Because he’d been pawing you all through dinner’ Cameron laughed. ‘And he wasn't even being discreet about it either. Anyway, it was July not February and I doubt Ma and Pop are worried about me getting deflowered.’

Hope watched the friendly banter with interest; despite the miles that separated them, it was obvious Cameron still had a strong connection with each and every one of his siblings. He’d been living in New York for over eight years now, ever since he'd started university and yet he slipped seamlessly into his role as big brother, almost as if he'd never left. She hoped she’d find a way to fit in somehow. After all, in a few short months, all these lovely people would become her in-laws. 

‘Listen, I’ve got stuff to do today but if you want, we could go shopping tomorrow’ Becky suggested, her voice growing excited. ‘Delphine’s is having a half-price sale.’

‘Delphine’s?’

Becky laughed. ‘Sorry… Delphine’s… it’s a really cool shop I like to go to. They’ve got great shoes and boots and beautiful scarves. I notice you like to wear scarves’ she said, pointing to the multicoloured pashmina Hope had wrapped around her shoulder, another gift from her thoughtful fiancé.

Cameron raised an eyebrow and watched as Hope’s face lit up. He’d been hoping these two would become friends and apparently, they were well on their way.

‘Yeah!’ Hope said with enthusiasm. ‘I’d like that. I’d like that a lot.’ 

Becky got to her feet and carried some of the dishes to the sink, making a small detour and returning to the table. She placed the swear jar in front of Cameron who was busy giving her a look of pure defiance.

‘Come on, bro’ she said, staring him down. ‘Nobody gets away with it. Pay up!’

WCWCWC

The thought of calling Jim McDougall, his old friend and addiction counsellor, had crossed Neal’s mind on a number of occasions since the last time he’d been to see him. But each time he got the urge, Neal would tell himself he was doing all right and he could handle things on his own just fine, thank you very much. 

But Sara had been right; it was time he faced up to the fact that he wasn't doing quite so fine these days. 

He leaned back and rocked in the dark brown leather chair - his one and only concession to luxury in his otherwise modest office. He thought of Caitlin. She’d seemed much calmer at breakfast and he’d suggested the two of them pay Linda a visit together when she got off work later in the day. He was keen on keeping her in his sights, to make sure she was coping all right with the events of the last twenty-four hours. She’d seemed pleased with his suggestion and had readily agreed to meet him at around four thirty up in Linda Bennett’s room at Blue Skies. If things went well, he was going to suggest they join up with Sara afterwards and have dinner out before heading back home. The sooner things got back to normal for their foster daughter, the better things would be for all of them.

Neal grimaced as he took a sip of his lukewarm coffee and turned his attention back to the school’s monthly financial statement, trying to keep his mind occupied while he waited for Jim to return his call. He hated the financial aspect of his job but as director, he had to keep a close eye on things and that meant reviewing the monthly reports prepared by the school’s financial officer. He was going over the payroll numbers for the third time when there was a soft knock on his office door. 

‘Neal?’ 

He looked up to find Cindy Harrington, director of the school’s foundation standing in the doorway with a rather short and plump gentleman by her side. June’s granddaughter had been working with Neal at the school since the day it first opened, five years before. Despite the generous inheritance left by his beloved benefactor, Neal had known since day one that the long term success of the school depended on some stable, ongoing funding and he’d managed to secure charitable status for the school, enabling companies and individuals to donate, hence, keeping it going for years to come. 

Cindy and Neal worked in tandem, their mutual goal clear: keeping June’s spirit alive by reaching out and supporting as many children and teens as they possibly could. Over the years, they’d joked that her job was to bring in the money and his, as head of the school, was to spend it.

Seeing the newcomer in the doorframe, Neal jumped to his feet, pasted on a bright smile and put his hand out in greeting.

‘You must be George Banning’ he said as the man got closer and clasped hands with Neal.

‘I am’ the grey-haired man replied with a smug smile.

‘I was just showing Mr. Banning around the school’ Cindy said, with a gentle smile. ‘He’s committed to donating $10,000 a year for the next five years.’

Neal nodded enthusiastically. ‘That’s wonderful news! We really appreciate your support.’

Cindy was a pro at this; once she’d roped in potential donors, she would invite them in for a visit. She’d take them around, introduce them to some of the kids, show off some of their work and make sure to walk the guests past the plaque in the front hall where the names of all donors were on display for everyone to see. The larger the donation, the larger the font on the fancy brass plaque that adorned the main wall in the school’s lobby. 

That usually clinched the deal. 

Cindy was aces at ferreting out potential donors’ and their motivations. Motives ranged from genuine altruism, wanting to contribute to helping youth in the community to self aggrandizement and chest pounding - and everything else in between.

It hadn't taken her long to figure out that George Banning wanted bragging rights and sweet revenge against a fellow rival. He was head of the local merchant’s association and owner of Banning’s Paper Supplies with its chain of five local stores. Cindy had been trying unsuccessfully to rope him in for going on two years despite the fact that the school purchased all of its cleaning and janitorial supplies from Banning’s, pouring several thousand dollars into their coffers every year. Neal had begun to consider moving their business to another company it the man didn't step up to the plate and cough up a generous donation.

After all, old man Banning could very well afford the tax-free donation…. and more. 

Of course, the free publicity wouldn't hurt him either; by adding his name to the long list of donors, he would come across as the benevolent business man, looking out for kids in his community. A little research on Cindy’s part had revealed that the man’s nemesis, Hank Coleridge from Coleridge and Sons had recently made a large donation to the school and that George Banning was pissed, refusing to be outdone. The two men had gone to college together, had been roommates in fact, and they’d spent the better part of thirty years in a pissing contest, comparing the size of their bottom lines - even though Hank’s business was audit and financial services - a far cry from toilet paper and liquid soap dispensers.

George had seen a picture in the local paper of Hank handing over a cheque to Neal and Cindy, proudly holding up an eight by twelve reproduction of the mural which graced the school’s front hall - a token gift the school gave to all its major contributors to thank them for their generosity. 

He wanted one of those too - more than one as a matter of fact.

‘We’re so happy to have you on board’ Neal said. ‘Cindy, make sure you show Mr. Banning our new exhibition hall.’ 

He turned to address the man. ‘Our twelve to fifteen-year-olds have been hard at work preparing for a new exhibit next month featuring winter landscapes. I’m sure you’ll love it.’

The man stood proudly, bouncing on his heels - definitely a case of little man syndrome. ‘I was rather keen on getting one of those…reproductions of your mural to put in my stores’ he said with glee.

‘Of course, Mr. Banning’ Cindy chimed in. ‘It goes without saying. We give one to all our major donors.’

He seemed a little uncomfortable but he looked over at Neal and smiled coyly. ‘I was hoping I could get one for each of our five locations.’

The reproductions were a small price to pay for the loyalty of their donors. The original that inspired them was the massive mural that covered the whole back wall of the school’s lobby, a labour of love he’d painted with Hope just before she’d gone off to university. After countless compliments on its originality, Neal had decided to offer its likeness to those who were generous enough to help them with their mission. He’d gotten his buddy Sam Jordan to frame about fifty or so of the cheap knockoffs and he stored them away in the back room, next to… all those rolls of toilet paper.

Neal looked at Cindy and frowned, his voice deep. ‘I don’t know… we have those custom made and… well, we usually keep it to one per donor.’ 

The man’s face got tighter; he wanted to best his nemesis, Hank Coleridge. Badly.

‘I… might be inclined to up my donation to $20,000 a year for ten years… if you could see your way clear to letting me have five of those paintings. It would be good publicity for your school, don’t you think?’

The man obviously thought he was pulling a fast one and he watched as Neal frowned and looked over at Cindy, feigning indecision. Truth was, the damn things ended up costing him less than fifty bucks a pop. For two hundred and fifty dollars of knockoffs, Neal had just boosted the man’s donation by $150,000. Not a bad tradeoff.

‘I don’t know…’ Neal began, looking earnestly at Cindy as if he were being asked to make some high risk investment.

She placed her arm on old man Banning’s and squeezed, playing her role as good cop to the hilt. ‘I’m sure we can work something out’ she said with confidence.

Neal gave her a look as if to say ‘it’s your decision but I hope you know what the hell you’re doing’ and the man beamed, pleased with himself for having pulled a fast one.

‘I’ll leave that in Cindy’s capable hands’ Neal finally said, self deprecatingly as the older man continued to smile broadly.

The phone rang and Neal glanced in the direction of his desk.

‘Well, I won’t keep you’ the older man said, shaking Neal’s hand vigorously. ‘It was nice to meet you.’

‘Thank you, thank you so much for stopping by Mr. Banning’ Neal said earnestly. ‘And thank you for your generous donation.’

Cindy placed a hand on the man’s back, preparing to lead him out. She turned to look at Neal over her shoulder and gave him an eyebrow wag as he responded with a discreet thumbs up. Conning rich people for the greater good was a hell of a lot of fun and, with time, the two of them had perfected the innocent little ploy into a fine art.

Neal settled in his chair and reached for the phone, holding his breath as he noticed who was calling.

‘Jim!’ he said cheerfully into the phone. ‘Thanks for returning my call.’

‘Hey man!’ came the booming voice of Jim McDougall. ‘It’s great to hear your voice.’

Neal hesitated, his earlier cockiness all but gone. ‘I was… hoping we could get together. Maybe sometime next week?’ 

‘Is this a social call?’ Jim McDougall asked.

‘No’ Neal replied soberly. ‘No, it’s not.’

WCWCWC

The ER’s waiting room was buzzing with students from Syracuse University when Liam stepped in sometime after three o’clock on Thursday afternoon. He recognized several of the faces although not all of them by name. There was a group of girls from Todd’s dorm clustered together, whispering, some of them were crying and two uniformed police officers were chatting with a couple of the students, notepad in hand.

Liam spotted Mike Perry and rushed over to talk to him.

‘Hey’ the young man said as he saw Todd’s ex walking towards him. ‘We’re still waiting for news. They haven't told us anything.’

‘What happened?’ Liam asked, noticing his hands were shaking.

‘I got back from class and I found him unconscious in our room. He’d taken a bunch of pills. Something called carba— something or other and he’d swallowed the rest of the bottle of Tylenol we had in the medicine cabinet. He wouldn't come to so I called an ambulance.’

Liam didn't know if he dared ask the next question. ‘Is he…’

‘He was breathing when we got here but… they rushed him back there and we haven't heard anything yet’ the young man said, pointing in the direction of a double set of doors.

A pretty brunette came over and slipped her hand in Mike’s. Liam immediately recognized her as Mike’s girlfriend although he couldn’t, for the life of him, remember her name.

She smiled at him. ‘Hi Liam’ she said, her voice quiet.

Mike pointed to the dozen or so young people sitting around. ‘Everybody wanted to come down to see if he was all right. Nobody really saw… any signs or anything.’

‘Did you see him this morning? Before you left?’ Liam asked, his breathing laboured.

‘Yeah, he didn't want to get out of bed. He was out drinking ’til late last night’ Mike said. He looked at Liam and pursed his lips. ‘He’s been doing that a lot lately… you know, since…’

Liam was staring off into space and the other man wasn't sure he’d heard him speak. ‘He’s been depressed lately but I thought, you know, with the two of you breaking up, it was kind of normal he’d be upset for a while. I didn't think it was anything more than that.’

Liam sighed loudly. How come he hadn't noticed any signs of depression? Was their breakup the reason for this? The only reason?

As if reading his mind, Mike reached back into his jeans pocket and pulled out a sealed envelope. Liam recognized Todd’s tidy handwriting from all the love notes he’d left him over the last few months.

‘He… left this on the desk in our room’ Mike said, handing it over for Liam to examine. ‘It’s got your name on it.’

Liam’s mind was racing and he could feel his pulse quickening as a familiar clamminess settled on the back of his neck. He knew the feeling all too well. He’d been dealing with diabetes since he was a kid and, most days, he had a pretty good handle on it, keeping his blood sugar levels steady with a strict regimen of diet and exercise. But this kind of shock was more than he could handle and he could feel his whole body start to tremble. He decided he better say something before he face planted in the middle of the ER. 

He shoved the envelope in his pants pocket. ‘I… just so you know… I’m diabetic’ he murmured, laying a finger on his MedicAlert bracelet. ‘Tell them… if I pass out. Maybe… you can call Josh’ he said as he let himself fall onto a nearby chair.

He could feel himself growing light headed and the next thing he knew Mike’s girlfriend was handing him a glass of water.

‘Do you want us to get a nurse?’ Mike was asking.

Liam shook his head. ‘I just… I just need a minute’ he said as he closed his eyes and tried to collect himself. He’d had a couple of episodes like these over the years, mostly when he’d been sick or when he hadn't taken care to check his blood sugar and he knew that if he could just check his levels and have a few minutes alone, he’d start to feel better.

A nurse appeared as a group of kids began congregating around him, the murmurs growing louder.

‘Who’s the diabetic?’ she asked as she tried to get through the thickening crowd. So much for not getting a nurse.

‘Over here!’ Mike called out.

The older woman elbowed her way in and took Liam’s arm. ‘Come on, let’s have you looked at’ she said as she led him away. 

WCWCWC

Liam was relieved when the door to the treatment room opened and he saw Josh Monteith standing there.

‘Jeez’ the young man said. ‘You scared the living crap out of me, Caffrey. You all right?’

Liam sat up, letting his legs dangle off the edge of the narrow bed. Now that he’d been force fed some juice, he was feeling a lot better.

‘Yeah, yeah, I just got a little dizzy. I’m fine.’

The look on Josh’s face told him he didn't believe a word he was saying. 

‘Seriously, man. It’s nothing’ Liam said dismissively. ‘They just checked my sugar levels and gave me some juice. I’ll be fine. Is there any news on Todd?’

‘Pretty well everybody’s gone home. They admitted him but the doctor says he’s going to pull through. They had to pump his stomach, though.’

Liam let out an audible sigh and he felt his shoulders drop, releasing the tension he hadn't noticed was there.

‘Who’s… who’s with him?’ Liam asked, visibly upset.

He knew all too well he couldn't be the one to hold his ex’s hand — but that didn't keep him from worrying.

‘His roomie is with him and they’ve called his parents. Apparently, they’re not very… supportive of him.’

‘What do you mean, not supportive?’

‘Mike says they pretty well disowned him when he came out of the closet. They’re kinda like religious fanatics or something.’

Liam sighed. Why had Todd never confided in him about that? ‘I don't get it, he was just down visiting his family at Christmas’ he said, frowning.

There was more. ‘Did you know he suffers from bipolar disorder?’

Liam’s mouth dropped open; apparently, the hits just kept on coming.

‘What? No! He never said anything. I’ve never seen him take meds or anything.’

‘Mike says he was supposed to take some mood stabilizing drug but that lately he hadn't been very good about taking it. Apparently, that’s what he OD’d on, his meds and some random stuff he found in their medicine cabinet.’

‘Shit!’ Liam said, running his hand through his hair in that way he had of doing when he couldn't figure something out.

‘Listen, do you need me to call your folks?’ Josh asked, perching himself next to Liam on the edge of the bed.

‘No! No, don’t call my folks. They’ll just worry. I’ll call them later and tell them what’s going on. Anyway, I’m supposed to have lunch with Hope tomorrow.’

‘I told the coach. He says if you’re not up to it, he’d give you a pass on the road trip this weekend.’

‘I’m fine… I just needed to stabilize my blood sugar levels’ Liam said meekly.

Josh brought his arm around Liam’s shoulder and gave him a couple of encouraging pats on the back. He was surprised when Liam began to cry softly and let his head fall on his shoulder.

‘Do you think this is my fault?’ he whispered, afraid to say the words too loud.

‘Of course not’ Josh said immediately. ‘Nobody can be responsible for somebody else’s actions.’

Liam sat up, collecting himself and wiping his eyes. ‘I should have noticed something wasn't right.’

‘Look, I don’t know a whole lot about this bipolar thing but isn't that where people have extreme mood swings… highs and lows?’

Liam shrugged. He’d certainly heard about the disorder but only in general terms. Personally, he didn't know of anyone who suffered from it - or at least he hadn't, up until today. He was well aware that mental illness wasn't discussed as openly as it should be. He remembered how Will’s ex-girlfriend Josie had been treated for depression back when they were in high school. And this kid he’d known in passing at White Plains High had actually tried to kill himself after he’d been bullied about being overweight. Surely, those two teens weren't the only ones in their large group of friends who’d had mental health issues over the years. And yet, he hadn't seen the signs in the one person he’d been spending the most time with over the last little while.

He looked up at Josh, his eyes brimming with tears. ‘I never meant to hurt him.’

‘I know that’ Josh replied soberly. ‘I’m sure Todd knows that too.’

‘Maybe I should have tried to let him down easier. You know… maybe I should have weaned him off, not broken it off so suddenly.’

Josh scoffed. ‘Liam, that’s ridiculous. You didn't do anything wrong. And I know how hard it was for you to finally make the decision to break it off with him.’

‘Still… Do you think I should go see him?’

‘I don’t think that’s a good idea. Mike told the doctor that he’d had a breakup recently and that he’d been feeling down. The nurse came out and told everybody that if someone needed to talk it out, there was a counsellor available.’

He let the suggestion hang in the air as Liam sat there, silent.

‘I think you should talk to someone… maybe get some advice on what you can do to help Todd.’

Liam still didn't say a word.

‘I just don't think rushing to his side is the right thing to do’ Josh concluded. ‘It’ll just make things worse.’

‘I just don’t want him to think I don’t care what happens to him… I do.’

Josh nodded in understanding.

Liam’s eyes wandered down to his jeans pocket, where he’d tucked away the envelope Mike Perry had given him. He pulled it out and held it in his trembling hands.

‘Holy shit!’ Josh said. ‘Is that what I think it is?’

Liam nodded silently. ‘Mike said he found it in their dorm room.’

He let his hand sweep over his name written in bright red pen across the front of the envelope. Leave it to Todd to leave such a flamboyant note when he was planning on offing himself.

Liam’s eyes came up to look at Josh, his eyelashes heavy with tears and he blinked.

‘Will you sit here with me while I read it?’

Josh’s arm was around him once more. 

‘Of course I will.’

TBC


	32. Chapter 32

‘Here, I brought you a hot water bottle’ Cameron said as he appeared in the doorway of the bedroom.

Hope groaned and turned to face him. ‘Thanks.’

He sat on the edge of the bed and Hope struggled to place the heat directly on her hip where she’d taken the brunt of the hit on her fall from grace - her literal fall from Grace - the young mare she’d ridden on her little excursion with Lucy. 

‘That was a nasty tumble you took’ he commented as he ran his hand through her hair. ‘It’s a good thing the snow cushioned your fall.’ 

Hope grimaced and managed a smile. ‘It’s fine, really. Lucy warned me not to pull on the reins so hard.’

‘I should have gone out with the two of you’ Cameron said with a pout. ‘I don’t know why I let you go out there by yourselves.’

She managed to sit up and give him an honest to goodness smile. ‘It’s okay Cam, we were out riding horses on the property. We weren’t shark cage diving.’

‘Still…’ he said, settling in on the bed beside her and placing a kiss on the top of her head. 

‘Hope, I made you some hot chocolate’ came Lucy’s voice from the doorway.

She was standing there with a worried look on her face, holding up a huge mug with, of all things, the picture of a horse on it. Hope could see some mini marshmallows floating on top. She sat up further, ignoring the flaring pain in her hip.

‘Thanks Lucy. I love hot chocolate.’

Cameron looked up at his baby sister. ‘It’s true, she does.’

Lucy’s frown melted into a smile and she took a few more steps, handing over the hot drink to Hope and taking a seat on her own bed, across from the two of them.

‘I’m sorry. Again’ she murmured.

‘Lucy, stop apologizing. It was totally my fault’ Hope said reassuringly. ‘You’re an excellent instructor. I’m just not very… athletic. Maybe we can stick to working together on an art project or something.’

She could see the young woman was feeling bad and she and Cameron shared a knowing look. He leaned in, his arm around Hope, his back up against the headboard of the twin bed and he brought his bare feet up on the bed, making himself comfortable. 

Right on cue, Bonnie Armstrong stuck her head in the room and Cameron straightened up as if he’d been caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

‘Here you go, sweetie’ she said handing Hope an extra pillow and a couple of Tylenol with a glass of water. ‘I thought these might help.’

‘Thanks Mrs. Armstrong’ Hope said, forcing a smile.

To her credit, Bonnie didn't comment on the fact that Cam was practically lying in the bed next to her but the reproachful look she gave her son was more than enough to get the message across - no matter the status of their relationship, she did not approve of him taking such liberties with a young woman in their home. 

‘Well…’ Bonnie said with a sigh. ‘I guess we should all be getting some rest.’

Cameron got to his feet, towering over his mom. ‘Are you sure you’re up to going to Pulaski tomorrow?’

‘Yeah, yeah, I’ll be fine. I’m looking forward to spending time with Liam.’

‘Owen says you’re more than welcome to take his car. The bus only runs twice a day. Or I can reschedule my lunch with Nathan and drive you over myself’ Cam offered.

‘No, no, you go meet your friend like you planned’ Hope said. ‘I’ll take Owen up on his offer and I’ll drive up there. I’ll be back in time for dinner.’

Cameron was aware of his mom hovering in the doorway like a sentinel, waiting for him to say goodnight - not that he was going to be making the moves on Hope anytime soon after what had happened that morning.

‘Well’ he said, leaning in to kiss her cheek. ‘Goodnight sweetie. Call me if you need me.’

Bonnie perked up. ‘I’m just two doors down, Hope’ she announced - whether that was meant as reassurance or a reminder that she was keeping an eyes on things from nearby. ‘Get some sleep.’

Lucy took out her sketching pad and sat up on her bed, pencil in hand as mother and son left the room. Her tongue stuck out of the corner of her mouth as she concentrated and Hope couldn't help but grin - she always did the same thing when she was painting. She took a sip of hot chocolate and beckoned her over.

‘Come here’ she called out. ‘Come show me what you’re working on.’

Lucy made her way over, taking up the spot Cameron had been occupying moments before. Hope glanced down at the drawing - a rough but extremely well executed image of herself atop a horse, presumably Grace. She was dressed in the clothes Becky had lent her - a suede jacket and a warm woolen scarf and holding on to the reins with assurance.

‘Wow!’ she said. ‘You made me look a lot more competent than I really am.’

Lucy giggled. ‘It’s just a rough draft. I’ll put in some colour tomorrow.’

‘You know, you have a lot of talent, Lucy. I teach classes at my dad’s gallery and I’ve seen a lot of aspiring artists but very few who are as good as this.’

The young girl smiled and shrugged. ‘Really?’ she asked shyly.

‘Really’ Hope said with a smile.

She glanced around the room as an idea began to form. ‘You know, I just had an idea.’

Lucy looked up, her eyes bright with excitement. 

‘If your mom and dad agree, maybe you and I can paint a mural over on that wall’ Hope said, pointing to the bare wall at the foot of the beds.

‘A mural!’ Lucy said, jumping to her feet.

‘IF your parents agree’ Hope repeated slowly. ‘We could go and get some supplies on the weekend and do something together. Oh, and Rhonda would have to be on board as well. After all, this is her room too.’

Lucy nodded enthusiastically. ‘I’ll work on some sketches at school tomorrow.’

‘Great!’ Hope said, setting down her cup. ‘Now, I think we should both get some sleep.’

The young girl unexpectedly threw her arms around Hope’s neck, squeezing tightly as Hope grimaced in pain. ‘Thank you, thank you so much’ she squealed with delight.

Hope brought her arms around her, hugging her back.

‘I love you, Hope!’ the young girl whispered in her ear.

WCWCWC

The squeaky sound of packed snow resonated against the car’s tires as Neal pointed the car down their street. He was feeling a lot more settled than he’d been the day before and relieved to see that his relationship with Caitlin was on the mend. She had refrained from talking about what had happened with her brother when they’d visited Linda earlier in the day but, then again, Neal figured she would probably wait until the two of them were alone together before she started pouring her heart out to her grandma. 

Instead, Neal had sat back and watched the two of them dispute a hot game of cribbage. Actually, it was a miracle when his mom managed to stay awake for more than a few minutes at a time and she’d made a valiant effort, hanging in there for a good ten minutes before she’d begun to fade. Caitlin, as always solicitous of the woman she considered her grandmother, had put the cribbage board and cards away in the small night table by her bed and had tucked the old woman in for a short nap before she and Neal had headed out to meet Sara for dinner.

The chat on the way to Manhattan had been pleasant enough; no talk of Jesse Davis and his doomed visit to White Plains. Instead, the two of them had talked about the upcoming exhibit at the school that Caitlin was helping Neal organize as well as her latest piece which had sold for $350 at the gallery. Caitlin was planning on buying this leather jacket she’d seen online with the proceeds - something she’d been eyeing for a while. 

Once Sara had joined them, the conversation had flowed even more easily and the three of them had enjoyed a leisurely meal at one of their favourite places, a vegetarian restaurant they all liked called the Green Papaya. It was a rare occasion when the Caffreys found themselves dining out alone with their foster daughter and everyone made the best of it, exchanging news about their day and planning for a possible visit up north to see one of Liam’s games. 

There was a small smattering of snow on the hood of the car when they finally pulled into the driveway shortly after nine o’clock and Caitlin excused herself to go up to her room to catch up on some series she was watching on Netflix.

‘I can do that’ Sara said as Neal walked over to the dishwasher and began to empty the contents.

‘That’s okay, I don’t mind’ he replied. The mindless task was welcome after the flurry of activity of the last few days.

Sara noticed one of Hope’s paintings propped up against one of the kitchen chairs and a black velvet bag on the table.

‘What’s this?’ she said as she picked up the mystery package and began poking around inside.

Neal looked over and spotted a note nearby.

‘Your treasures returned. You can thank me later’ the note read.

‘Looks like Moz dropped by’ he commented.

Sara looked up at him and shrugged; even though Mozzie didn't have a key, he always seemed to find a way into the house, no matter how often they changed the security code.

‘I thought you changed the alarm code last week’ she commented as she pulled out a pair of familiar looking silver earrings.

‘I did’ he replied, looking over his shoulder at her. ‘When has that ever stopped him?’ 

‘Ahhh, here they are’ Sara said, pulling out the pearl earrings that were her sentimental favourites. 

She looked over at her husband and held them up to her ears. ‘I love these…’ she cooed. ‘Even though they’re not the originals, they’ll always remind me of our wedding day.’

Neal smiled as he recalled spending way too much on the wedding gift and having Elizabeth sneak them up to Sara in his apartment at June’s, mere minutes before they walked down the aisle. 

‘You realize this is the second time these have been stolen’ she reminded him.

Neal frowned, as the recollection came flooding back; with the passage of time, he’d completely forgotten that Caitlin had helped herself to the contents of Sara’s jewelry box the first time they’d invited her into their house. Presumably, she’d thought the invitation to join the Caffreys for shepherds pie had included unrestricted access to Sara’s baubles and trinkets. 

‘You know I completely forgot about that’ he said as he poked around and pulled out the expensive cufflinks. ‘It seems so long ago.’

Sara brought her hand to rest on his back. ‘You were able to forgive her for that and all that other crap she tried to pull’ she reminded him. ‘Even back then with all the lunacy, you managed to see the good in her.’

Neal’s eyes remained on the cufflinks although he wasn't really seeing them. ‘If I hadn't had people in my corner back when I was… misbehaving, I never would have pulled through’ he said with a smirk. ‘I figured she deserved a chance too.’

Sara’s arms settled around his waist and he pulled her in against his chest. ‘Your instincts were right back then, Caffrey. She’s a terrific kid… she just needed a little guidance.’

‘Do you think there’s still hope for Jesse?’ he murmured in her ear. ‘I mean, do you think I should have taken a different tack with him, tried to help him turn his life around?’

‘Neal, Jesse is a thirty year old man and Caitlin was a fifteen-year-old kid. It’s not the same. I think he’s pretty set in his ways and besides, you can’t save the world Caffrey, no matter what you might think.’

Neal wagged his eyebrows, his mind wandering. ‘Peter wants to meet for coffee tomorrow’ he said out of the blue. ‘Says he wants to talk to me about something.’

‘Oh yeah?’

He thought he spotted something in her eyes. ‘You don’t happen to know what that’s all about, do you?’

Sara shrugged and tried to avoid his probing gaze. ‘Come on honey. It’s getting late.’ She pointed to the dishwasher. ‘We can finish that in the morning.’

A flashing light caught her eye as she turned - the light from the answering machine on the kitchen counter blinking wildly. 

‘We’ve got a message.’

Within a few seconds, Liam’s voice was heard resonating in the kitchen. ‘Hey Mom! Hi Dad! Just checking in but I guess you’re out having dinner or something. Anyway, I won’t bother to call your cells, it’s not that important… I’ll call back tomorrow. Love you guys.’

Neal and Sara exchanged concerned looks and without a word, Neal picked up the phone and pressed speed dial, only to get Liam’s voicemail just as he’d gotten theirs before.

‘Hey buddy. We’re still up if you want to call back. Otherwise, we’ll talk to you tomorrow. Hope everything’s okay. Love you too.’ Neal said into the phone.

‘Maybe he’s already asleep’ Sara theorized as she slipped her arm around Neal and nudged him towards the stairs. Without much afterthought, they turned out the last of the downstairs lights and headed up the stairs to their bedroom.

WCWCWC

Liam watched as Hope sat across from him, her empty plate before her and Todd’s note in her hands. He watched her eyes sweeping back and forth on the sheet of paper, deep frown lines forming on her forehead as she read. He’d read it so many times he could practically recite it by heart, each word like a knife through his heart.

"Dear Liam,

I want you to know just how much you meant to me, a lot more than I let on. I know we’d only been dating a short while but having you in my life meant more than you’ll ever know. I know it started out as just a little bit of fun but the next thing I knew, I was falling hard for you. Whenever I heard your voice or saw your face, my heart would start thumping like a marching band and I would feel giddy. You did that to me, Liam Caffrey."

I should have been honest about some of the stuff going on in my life and all the shit back home with my mom and my dad. I guess I just wanted to feel normal, like everybody else and I was afraid you’d think less of me if you knew I was so fucked up. But when we were together, I could forget about all my troubles and just be myself although I’m not sure who that is anymore. Anyway, it just hurts too much - every day I wake up and I realize I’m all alone. Nobody cares.

Hope gasped and looked up at her brother, mouth agape. ‘Poor guy…’ she murmured as she momentarily put the note down on the table.

‘Keep reading’ Liam said, his voice choked.

Hope returned her eyes to the note while Liam stared back at her.

"My folks hate me and they tell me I’m going straight to hell because God never intended for a man to be with another man. I guess I’m about to find out if there is such a thing as hell. Liam, I loved you, I really did, not just as a friend with benefits but as the man I wanted to share my life with. I kept hoping I could make you feel the same way about me and that eventually you’d forget all about Cody. Liam, you were the one for me. You’re sweet and kind and you always made me smile. My life had meaning when we were together. Now that you don’t want me in your life anymore, everything is just so empty, so fucked up, there’s nothing to look forward to. Don’t feel bad, I was pretty messed up even before we met. This isn't your fault. I just wish things could have been different between us. 

Todd"

Hope shook her head as she finally set the paper down on the table between them.

‘Oh Liam… this is so sad.’

He nodded. ‘I had no idea what he was going through. I didn't even know he'd been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. What kind of boyfriend does that make me?’

Hope’s hand reached for his. ‘I’m sure you were a wonderful boyfriend’ she said. ‘Todd is right, this isn't your fault. If he’d wanted you to know, he would have told you.’

Liam didn't look convinced. ‘I just wish he’d opened up to me about it. It doesn't change anything… or it wouldn’t have changed anything… I mean about the way I felt about him.’

‘There was this girl in my music elective at university’ Hope confided. ‘I walked in on her in the bathroom one day. She was throwing up. She said she had the flu but a few of us already figured she had some kind of eating disorder. She weighed like eighty pounds. Anyway, she ended up in hospital and Monica, this girl from my class and I went to visit her. She said she was embarrassed and she didn't want anybody to know. She begged us not to tell anyone.’

She took the letter in her hands and glanced at it. ‘It sounds like Todd just wanted to have a regular relationship and not think about the issues he was dealing with. That’s not your fault, Liam. It has nothing to do with you.’

He listened, nodding his head as his sister continued. ‘There’s still such stigma around mental health issues and sometimes people hesitate sharing what they’re going through.’ 

He shrugged. ‘I suppose… I wish he’d told me, though. Maybe I could have helped him or at least I could have managed the breakup a little better.’

‘I know you. I’m sure you were loving and sensitive’ Hope said with a sad smile.

Liam shook his head. ‘I broke up with him and then he came to my room a couple of nights later and I… I slept with him again. That was so stupid. It probably made the whole thing even worse for him… maybe I gave him false hopes.’

‘You know what they say about hindsight… But the one thing I know for sure is that you did the best you could under the circumstances. And you never meant to hurt him.’

She watched her brother as he took the note and read it again, his eyes droopy. 

‘Have you seen him yet?’

‘No. Josh convinced me to wait and talk to someone about it first. I don’t want to make things worse.’

‘I think that’s probably sage advice, squirt. Is he still in the hospital?’

‘Yeah, they’re keeping him under observation for seventy-two hours and then they’ll decide if they should release him…’

There was silence for a moment as Liam folded up the note and returned it to his shirt pocket. 

‘I just don’t want him to think I don’t care about him. I do. You don’t just… turn off your feelings for someone, you know. He’s a great guy, he’s funny and full of life and… kinda the opposite of me’ he chuckled.

Hope smiled as she listened. 

‘It’s just that… when I came home at Christmas and I saw Cody again, I realized I’m still in love with him and what I had with Todd, well, it felt sort of empty and… I didn't want to keep stringing him along. That’s why I broke up with him. But I care about him… I don't want anything to happen to him.’

Hope returned her hand to his and squeezed. 

‘I’m sure he knows that. Deep down.’ 

The look of anguish on Liam’s face lingered.

‘You are such a sweet, sweet man’ she said with a gentle smile. ‘And you deserve to be happy. But most importantly, you have to be honest with yourself about your feelings for Todd and for Cody. You can’t stay in a relationship because you’re afraid the guy might hurt himself. That’s no basis for a future together.’

She could feel him starting to come around. ‘Besides, you can’t control what Todd thinks… or does. And right now, it sounds like the best thing you can do for him is to stay away and let him start to heal, get the help he needs. Maybe someday you can be friends again but if you go back now, he might see it as something more.’

Liam just stared ahead and nodded, his eyes lifeless.

‘Did you call Mom and Dad yet?’

He shook his head. ‘I left them a message last night but I kinda regretted it and I’ve been avoiding their calls all morning’ he said glancing at his phone and noticing another missed call from Neal’s cell phone. ‘You know Dad, he’ll hightail it down here the minute he hears.’

Hope knew that to be true. If Neal Caffrey thought his kids needed him for anything, he was there in a New York minute.

‘I still think you should tell them. Are you sure you’re up to going on that road trip this weekend?’

‘Yeah… it doesn't do me any good to sit around and worry about Todd.’

‘What about you? Who’s going to make sure you’re all right? Who can you talk to who can help you deal with all this?’

He shrugged. ‘There’s a counsellor I could see at the university…’

‘Do it’ Hope interrupted. ‘Talk to someone, Liam. Do it today.’ 

She checked her watch. ‘You know I could hang out a little while longer, go back to Syracuse with you.’

‘No, no, I’m fine. I promise I’ll call student services the minute I get back and I’ll make an appointment to talk to someone.’

‘And definitely call Mom and Dad. Do you want me to do it for you?’

‘Naw, I’ll do it when I get back. I promise.’

For all the words he was spouting, she remained unconvinced.

‘Tell you what. Why don’t we just hop in the car I highjacked and I’ll drive you back to the university. We can talk some more and… maybe we can call Mom and Dad together, that’ll give them a kick.’

‘That’s ridiculous Hope. It’s an hour out of your way and then you’ll have to drive all the way back to Watertown.’

‘So? Are you telling me you’re willing to pass up the unique opportunity of spending an extra hour with me?’ she asked as she reached down for her purse, wincing in pain. 

‘Really? You’d do that?’

She scoffed and rolled her eyes, not bothering to answer. 

Spending time with his sister sure beat sitting on a bus for an hour replaying the events of the last twenty-four hours on a loop in his muddled brain.

‘All right’ he said, getting to his feet. ‘Thanks sis…’

He watched as Hope struggled to get to her feet, her hand on her hip to steady herself. 

‘What’s with you anyway?’ he asked. ‘You look like you fell off a horse.’

WCWCWC

Neal was sitting in the little café next door to the Raphael, waiting for Peter to arrive when his phone rang. He was used to getting texts aplenty from both his kids but phone calls were usually reserved for conversations that were a little more difficult to have by text. He glanced at the screen. 

Finally, the call he’d been waiting for.

‘Liam?’ 

‘Wrong kid, Dad’ Hope replied with a giggle. 

‘What the heck… how come you’re calling from Liam’s phone? Is everything all right?’

Liam’s voice came on the line. ‘Hey Dad!’ he called out from the passenger seat of the car.

‘What are you two doing together?’

‘When Cam and I got to Watertown, I realized we were only a couple of hours away from Syracuse so… Liam and I just finished having lunch at probably the worst greasy spoon in Pulaski’ she said with a chuckle.

‘Ouch!’ Neal replied.

He could see Peter coming through the door of the café and waved him over, the phone still glued to his ear.

‘I’m just driving him back’ Hope continued. ‘Cam’s brother lent me his car for the day.’

‘Mom and I got your message last night, buddy’ Neal said as Peter took the seat across from him. ‘Is everything okay?’

Liam hesitated but Hope gave him a stern look. ‘Todd’s in the hospital Dad’ he said.

‘In the hospital? How come?’

‘He… he took some pills’ Liam replied.

‘Oh no… Is he going to be all right?’

‘They’re checking him out and he’s going to get the help he needs’ Liam said, trying to sound upbeat.

‘What about you?’ Neal said, predictably. ‘Are you okay?’

‘Yeah, yeah, Josh has been great and… well, as you can see, I’ve been kidnapped by Hope. She insisted on driving me back.’

‘That sounds wise’ Neal said with a smile. ‘You know, I can be up there in just a few hours…’

The Caffrey siblings looked at each other knowingly. He was so predictable.

‘It’s okay, Dad. I’ve got this. Don’t worry’ came Hope’s voice. ‘I’ll stick around until he’s settled.’

‘I just thought you should know’ Liam said, his voice quiet.

‘Yeah, yeah, sure. Look, I’m just sitting down with your uncle Peter. Why don’t you call when you’re back in your dorm and we can talk some more?’ Neal suggested.

If they didn't want Neal jumping in the car and showing up on Liam’s doorstep, they’d better agree to his suggestion. 

‘Sure, I’ll call home tonight’ Liam said. ‘In the meantime, tell Mom not to worry. I’m fine.’

‘Okay buddy’ Neal replied, trying to keep the concern out of his voice. ‘Love you both.’

‘Who’s in the hospital?’ Peter asked, the minute Neal hung up.

‘Remember that guy Liam was dating, the one he just broke up with?’

‘Todd something or other?’

‘Yeah, well, apparently he took a bunch of pills.’

‘Holy shit! Because Liam broke up with him?’

‘I don’t know…’ Neal said, his voice trailing. ‘Hope’s with him so… I think things are under control for the moment.’

Peter nodded soberly. ‘You want your usual?’ he asked, pointing towards the counter where the owner was busy serving a customer.

Neal nodded absent-mindedly. ‘Yeah, sure…’ 

He looked up at Peter.

‘And then you can tell me what it is you wanted to talk to me about.’

TBC


	33. Chapter 33

Peter stood at the counter waiting for his order: an espresso for him and a decaf vanilla latte for Neal. He had one eye on the table he’d just left, watching as Neal fiddled with his phone - probably filling Sara in on what he’d just found out about the goings on upstate. 

Peter sighed. Elizabeth had been on his case for the better part of three weeks to finally step up to the plate and share his retirement plans with Neal. Truth was, he wasn't quite sure why he was hesitating to break the news. At first, he’d told himself it was because Neal had a lot on his plate and that, considering he’d be at the gallery until mid-summer, there was no rush to share the news. Then, just before Christmas, Linda had gotten sick, which had totally destabilized Neal. After that, there’d been that whole thing with Neal’s high blood pressure, followed by his avowed insecurities about Sara rubbing elbows with her rich, handsome ex and his existential crisis in the bedroom. He’d been about to spring it on him the previous week when the whole thing with Caitlin’s brother exploded. It seemed that his partner’s life was filled with landmines - one thing after another. There would never be a good time to let him know about his retirement plans and frankly, Peter was tired of having Elizabeth on his case. 

It was now or never. 

As far as the gallery was concerned, there was no doubt that Cameron and Hope had things well in hand. Since her accident and her unexpected withdrawal from Carnegie Mellon, Hope had been working at the Raphael full time and Cam had come an awfully long way since those early days when Neal had plucked him from amongst his group of students at NYU and offered him a part-time job.

But managing the gallery wasn’t just a job, it was an opportunity for Peter to sustain the precious bond that existed between him and Neal - a bond that had started under very unusual circumstances over thirty years earlier.

Their relationship had gone through a series of metamorphoses over the years beginning with their mutual respect and admiration for each other while on opposing sides of the law. It had morphed into a rather lopsided handler/CI dynamic which had eventually developed into a mutually satisfying and balanced friendship based on reciprocal appreciation and respect, something that both men cherished. 

Of course, they would always remain friends, no matter what, but such a close bond required nurturing and seeing Neal everyday as part of his workday helped to sustain the relationship they had worked so hard to build. Would that closeness remain intact when they didn't have that physical proximity to each other on a daily basis? 

‘Mr. Burke’ the barista called out, pulling him out of his reverie. Peter reached for the hot beverages and made his way over to join Neal.

‘Thanks’ Neal muttered as Peter placed the cup in front of him. He was lost in thought and Peter watched the younger man as he ran his hand absentmindedly through his thick head of hair.

He stared down at his hand, noticing a stray grey hair stuck between his fingers and he flicked it away with a look of disdain. 

‘Do you think I should cover the grey in my hair?’ he asked unexpectedly.

‘What?’ Peter replied with a frown of his own. ‘What the hell are you talking about Neal?’

‘I’m talking about… the fact that Randall Piper probably colours his hair’ Neal said with an impetuous pout. ‘Maybe I should look into that.’

‘Again with this Piper guy! I thought you were over all that. You should be, you know. From what I’ve seen of him in pictures, Randall Piper’s got nothing on you.’ 

Neal shrugged and picked up his cup, taking a tentative sip. ‘A lot of guys use stuff to… you know, make them look a little younger.’

Peter examined his best friend; although more vain than most, Neal had never showed signs of being insecure about his looks - quite the contrary, in fact. 

‘I joined a gym last week’ Neal continued. ‘I want to start running again.’

‘So, what’s brought all this on?’ 

‘Nothing…’ Neal lied before admitting the source of his insecurities. ‘Sara’s going over to one of his residences next week to inventory his stuff.’

‘So? What does that have to do with anything? That’s her job, isn't it?’

Neal just shrugged and pouted.

‘And because your wife is doing her job, you want to mess with that beautiful salt and pepper hair of yours.’

‘It’s hardly salt and pepper’ Neal said, visibly annoyed. He pulled up his phone and set it to camera, turning it on himself as he examined his full head of hair. He touched his locks, zeroing in on the greying temples. ‘It’s just a few… strands.’

Peter could see he wasn't going to succeed in distracting his partner from his sudden obsession with his looks… unless he changed the subject.

‘So, is Caitlin’s brother gone for good?’ 

Neal put the phone down on the table. ‘I sure as hell hope so. He’s done enough damage.’

‘It’s a good thing you figured out what he was up to before he acted on it. Do you really think he was going to try to hit the gallery?’

‘The fence told Moz that Jesse promised he could deliver some of the paintings from our Forsythe collection.’

Peter’s eyes widened. ‘At least the guy’s got taste’ he said, tongue in cheek.

‘I don’t know if he thought he could talk Caitlin into being a willing accomplice or if he was just planning to use her to get the security code… by the way, did you change it like I asked?’

‘Yup. We’re good’ Peter replied. He grabbed for a napkin lying on the table and jotted down a rather lengthy series of letters and numbers.

Neal frowned as he tried to make sense of it. 

‘The day, month and year the Yankees last won the series followed by Matsui’s dog’s name’ Peter explained with a smirk.

‘Matsui?’

‘He was the MVP that year.’

‘He had a dog named Chew Barka?’ Neal asked, unable to let it go.

Peter shrugged. ‘Hey, I had a dog named Satchmo and you named your dog after a famous artist - whose painting you stole, by the way.’

Neal gave him an earnest look, batting his eyelashes at him. ‘Well, actually, it was more of a Ninja Turtles thing.’

Peter gave him an eyebrow wag and watched as Neal tucked the piece of paper into his shirt pocket. 

‘So, what’s up with you anyway? You sounded serious on the phone.’

‘Did I?’ Peter said, feigning innocence. ‘It’s nothing, really. Just… talk about the gallery. You know… it’s been a while since we talked about… stuff.’

Neal stared back, eyebrows raised. ‘Stuff? Come on Peter, it’s me.’

‘What? Can’t we talk about the gallery without you getting all suspicious.’

‘Is this about you slowing down and cutting back on your hours?’

Peter let his mouth drop open; either Neal was psychic - which he knew he wasn't - or El had let it slip to him or more likely, to Sara.

‘I…I…’ he blubbered.

‘Peter, it’s fine’ Neal said, putting a good face on Peter’s revelation. 

Sara’s offhand comment about Peter slowing down and eventually quitting came flooding back. Since the night she’d blurted it out, he hadn't really given it much thought; he hadn't wanted to believe that Peter was anywhere near retirement. Maybe he was wrong. He sat back and waited for his best friend to straighten him out on the subject. 

Instead, Peter put another nail in the coffin. ‘El’s selling Burke Premiere Events.’

‘Selling?’ Neal repeated as if he'd somehow misunderstood. The fact was, he sort of remembered Sara saying something about it, although his recollection was vague.

‘Yeah, she’s… retiring this summer.’

‘Wow! I didn’t see that one coming’ Neal admitted as he sat back in his seat. ‘But she loves event planning.’

‘I know but it’s time she… we start enjoying ourselves. You know, traveling, relaxing, sleeping in…’ The words sounded hollow, even to his ears.

Neal stared back, shocked; as much as he'd expected that Peter would eventually start to decrease his hours at the gallery, it had never occurred to him that he would actually stop working altogether. Peter was a vibrant, healthy man for his age, for any age, and he couldn't imagine him as part of the golf and leisurely lunch crowd.

‘So, you’re thinking about retiring?’ he asked once his brain got unstuck.

Peter just shrugged. 

‘I… didn’t think we were there yet’ Neal said, his voice quiet.

‘Well, apparently we are’ Peter replied with a forced chuckle.

Neal recovered, not wanting to pour cold water on Peter’s unexpected news. ‘That’s… that’s great news Peter’ he said with a forced smile of his own. ‘You deserve it. You’ve worked hard.’

Peter nodded. ‘Yeah, well mostly it’s El’s idea. I mean, the timing. I knew the day was coming and… well, she’s ready to take the leap so…’

‘So… when?’

‘Probably early summer. Give you a chance to work everything out. See how you want to handle the financial end of things at the gallery.’ 

Neal just nodded vacantly.

‘You know Neal, I think Cam would be ready to take on the bookkeeping. He’s got a really good head on his shoulders.’

Neal just kept nodding.

‘And he’s already doing most of the buying as it is and he’s got such a discriminating eye… you really taught him well.’

‘He’s a natural’ Neal agreed, lifting his cup in a salute to his best friend. ‘Congratulations Peter! I think that’s great news.’

Peter mimicked him, lifting his small cup of espresso and bringing it to rest against Neal’s larger mug of latte. They toasted the good news which apparently wasn't good news at all - for either man.

WCWCWC

True to his word, Liam called his parents on Friday night after Hope had left to return to the Armstrong farm. He’d enjoyed spending time with his clever, level-headed sister; she’d left him with some words of wisdom and reassurances that she was always at the other end of the phone, day or night. 

As expected, Neal offered to come up and spend some time with him but Liam flat out refused. He was leaving town the next day for an away game and he wouldn't be back until late Sunday, he argued. Besides, there was very little he could do for Todd Greenway at the moment; he needed to step back and be patient while the doctors did their thing. He promised to let his folks know how things were going when he made it back to Syracuse and he informed them that he’d booked an appointment with a counsellor from students’ services on the upcoming Monday, all in the hopes of getting sound advice on how he could be the most help to his ex. 

In the meantime and unbeknownst to Liam, Josh Monteith had enlisted a few of the guys on the team in an effort to keep his roomie occupied during their overnight trip. Of course, mandatory game preparation and the actual game itself took up a fair bit of time and he’d arranged for some of the guys to take Liam out after the game, ensuring young Caffrey wouldn’t have a minute to himself to brood or ruminate about the events of the last few days.

Luckily for Liam, Josh was a firm believer in the notion that it takes a village - or in this case, a team. 

WCWCWC

Saturdays had a totally different vibe on the Armstrong homestead. Despite the fact that Fred and Becky still had their daily chores - just as they did the other three hundred and sixty-four days of the year, everybody else was home from school and Hope observed with interest as a hive of activity took shape. 

Bonnie, who spent forty hours a week working outside the home, was up early baking bread and muffins and planning meals for the upcoming week while, without any prompting whatsoever, the girls and little Joe tended to their own chores which included tidying their rooms and helping with some general cleanup of the bathrooms and common spaces. Owen had his own list of things to do which, on this particular Saturday, included fixing the hinge on the cabinet in the downstairs bathroom and repairing a creaky door down in the laundry room. With Cam there to help with the chores, Becky turned her attention to the weekly checklist of inventory as well as the bookkeeping for the previous month. Cam donned his knee high rubber boots and an old flannel shirt and followed his dad out to the barn and the stables to see to the animals, collect the milk and clean out the stalls. 

Bonnie had given the girls the green light on their art project - as long as she approved of the design - and Hope was pleased to find that Rhonda and Lucy had managed to agree on a theme for their new mural. From what she’d seen of their earlier squabbles, this collaborative effort was most definitely progress. By lunchtime, the household chores were done and Mama Bear relieved everyone of their duties, prompting Hope to corral the girls for a visit to the art supplies store in town.

The afternoon was spent working on the mural, an eclectic mix of images of some of the girls’ favourite boy band members in a country setting, riding horses mostly — and looking mighty fine doing so. There was heated discussion about some of the details but ultimately cool heads prevailed and a compromise was arrived at, to Hope’s relief. She and Lucy were tasked with drawing the images onto the wall while Rhonda filled in some colour and some of the less finicky work, using various shades of acrylic paint and a surprising amount of gold dust.

At around four o’clock, Bonnie peeked in to check on the progress, bringing along a pitcher of lemonade and some freshly baked brownies and announcing that she and Fred had a date night and were getting ready for dinner out at their favourite Italian place in town - something which, according to the girls, happened once in a blue moon. 

An hour later, after a great deal of work and an equal amount of laughter, the trio of artists stood back in admiration in front of their new mural. Hope let out a sigh of satisfaction and fell onto the bed, exhausted. That’s about all she remembered before she fell asleep and when she woke sometime later, the girls had tidied everything up and were nowhere in sight. 

Instead, Cameron was sitting on the edge of the bed, looking down at her with goo-goo eyes.

‘Hey sleepy head’ he said with a warm smile.

Hope blinked a few times and glanced at the mural out of the corner of her eye. It was looking even better than she remembered.

‘You and the girls did a great job’ he said, kicking off his shoes and climbing into bed with her.

‘Cam! What are you doing? If your mom sees us, she’s going have a cow.’

Cameron chuckled. ‘Well, for one thing, she already has thirty-three of them and… besides, she and my dad just left for dinner.’

He snuggled up to her, nuzzling her neck and Hope felt that familiar flutter in her stomach.

‘Hi’ she moaned as she brought her lips to his. ‘I’ve missed you.’

Cam let out this low groan she was all too familiar with and his hands began to wander underneath her sweater, reaching for her bra.

‘Cam…stop it’ she said half heartedly. ‘The girls are around…’

He continued his exploration, undeterred. ‘The girls are at the stables getting some surprise ready for you’ he said, his lips roaming.

‘A surprise? For me?’

‘Well, for us… they told me to stay away and they’d call us when they were ready.’

Hope pulled away, lying on her back and glancing over at their work of art; she was pretty darn pleased with the result. But mostly, she was glad the feuding sisters had found a way of working together on a common project.

‘Looks good, huh?’ she said, examining their handiwork.

Cameron’s eyes and hands were all over her. ‘Yeah…’ he replied, his voice rough. ‘Looks real good.’

She gave him a playful slap on the arm. ‘Cam, I’m serious!’ she whined.

‘Oh, so am I, baby. So am I’ he moaned, as he reached around her back and unclasped her bra.

‘Would you please!’ She sat up, attempting to put her bra back on before someone walked in.

Cam let his arms fall away, and let himself fall on his back with a long, painful sigh. ‘Jeez babe… you’re killing me here. We haven't been alone together in almost a week.’

She chuckled, amused. ‘First off’ she said, turning to face him. ‘We’ve only been here four days and secondly… I’ve never heard of anyone dying from lack of sex.’

He pouted. ‘Well, I just might be the first’ he complained. ‘You know, a guy’s got needs.’

‘Needs?’ she said with a giggle. ‘I think you can keep it in your pants a little bit longer, there, Romeo. I have a reputation to uphold around here.’

He tickled her and she began to kick playfully, trying not terribly hard to get away from him.

‘Hope?’

They stopped tussling and looked up to see Lucy and Rhonda standing by foot of the bed, looking down on them with an amused look on their faces.

Hope sat up, pulling down her sweater and pushing away her thick mane of hair from her flushed face.

‘Hey girls! We were just… admiring the mural’ Hope attempted without much success.

Lucy’s hand went to her mouth as she giggled. ‘That’s funny’ she said, deadpan. ‘I usually keep my clothes on when I’m looking at art.’

Rhonda piped up, looking very excited. ‘We have a surprise for the two of you. Over in the stables.’

Cameron sat up and smiled at his two little sisters. ‘A surprise? What have you girls been up to?’

Lucy began to jump up and down on the spot like an excited three-year-old. ‘Hurry up. Get your jackets and come and see.’ 

WCWCWC

‘Careful, careful!’ Sara shouted as the two men struggled to carry the awkward piece of furniture down the stairs.

‘We’ve got it Sara!’ Neal replied curtly.

She’d insisted on removing the old mattress and box spring from their room before the delivery men arrived with the new one so she could clean properly behind the headboard. Neal had reminded her repeatedly that the guys from Jerrold’s Bed Emporium would gladly take the old bed away, free of charge… But no. Sara Ellis had to have things her way - and Neal had been browbeaten into carrying out the onerous task despite his protestations and better judgement.

With Liam and Cam both away, Neal had called on Liam’s bestie Will Allenby to give him a hand while, to his chagrin, Sara directed traffic from her perch at the top of the stairs. He’d tried to get her out of the house but she’d insisted on being there when the new bed arrived to make sure things went smoothly - her words, not his. As if Neal Caffrey, ex-conman extraordinaire, gallery owner, director of the June Ellington School of Art, father of two and competent adult couldn't sign on a dotted line and point the delivery guys towards their bedroom. 

Neal panted as he arrived at the bottom of the steps, supporting the bulk of the weight of the box spring and regretting not having let Will go down the stairs first. At nineteen, the young man was in significantly better shape than the owner of the house. But it had been a matter of pride and Neal wasn't about to admit that, at the ripe old age of sixty, he wasn't still perfectly capable of removing a bed from his own home. 

‘Turn just a little’ Neal instructed Will, his voice quiet.

‘TURN JUST A LITTLE!’ Sara shouted from up above as Neal rolled his eyes.

‘Got it Mrs. Caffrey’ Will replied politely, manoeuvring easily around the turn at the bottom of the stairs.

‘Watch the wall!’ she admonished as Neal sighed in exasperation.

Just as he arrived by the front door, it flew open and in waltzed Caitlin carrying a tray of drinks. 

‘Whoa!’ she called out, as she narrowly avoided getting knocked over by Neal.

‘Can you hold the door open for us?’ he asked, breathing heavily.

The cold winter air blew in and Neal regretted not having grabbed his jacket before he’d begun the task; oh well, the cable knit sweater he’d thrown on over his shirt would have to do. He sure as hell wasn't stopping to put on his coat now. Not until the damn thing was safely transported to the curb.

He backed up into the doorway almost missing the one and only step down to the front porch, his foot slipping on the freshly fallen snow as he let out a yelp.

‘CAREFUL!’ Sara shouted from halfway down the stairs.

‘SARA!’ Neal shouted back impatiently. ‘I told you, we’ve got it!’

The cold winter air was amazingly effective motivation to hurry things along and within thirty seconds or so, Neal and Will reappeared in the doorway, closing the door behind them.

Neal rubbed his hands together in an effort to warm them up and Will gave Caitlin a tentative smile. She was still standing there with the tray of hot drinks in her hands. 

‘I made you guys some hot chocolate before my shift ended’ she declared, handing a cup to Neal and another one to Sara. 

Will stood there, feeling out of place. 

‘Here, you can have mine’ Caitlin said with a smile. ‘I can make one anytime… the perks of working in a coffee shop. Besides, it looks like you need it more than I do.’

Will reached out to take the cup and he smiled shyly in her direction. Neal was about to take a sip of his drink when Sara intervened, reaching over and grabbing the cup out of his hand.

‘The mattress’ she said with a scowl. ‘You still haven't brought down the mattress.’

Neal sneered at her. ‘I don’t think it’s going anywhere on its own’ he said, forcibly taking back the cup and staring her down as he took a sip.

He grimaced as he felt the burn on the tip his tongue; so much for his dramatic act of defiance.

‘But they said they’d be here between two and four o’clock’ she reminded him, looking at her watch.

‘Jesus, Sara! What is your problem? Would you relax! We’re having a bed delivered, not having the Queen over for high tea.’

Sara’s eyes narrowed in reaction to her husband’s sudden outburst. He was usually pretty good about keeping his cool but she’d been particularly anal all day and her insistence that they get the bed out of the house and down to the end of the driveway before the new one arrived had seemed, at least to Neal, capricious and illogical. That, and the fact that he wasn't particularly enjoying the little aches and pains that always surfaced whenever he did physical work around the house - a constant reminder that he wasn't as young as he used to be. 

To her credit, Sara Ellis could give as good as she got and she shot him a look of disdain. 

‘Well…’ she said snippily. ‘I’m going upstairs to get started on cleaning behind the headboard. Who knows what I’ll find jammed in there after all these years.’

Caitlin and Will exchanged awkward glances; neither one of them was used to seeing the Caffreys in anything but lovey-dovey mode. As a frequent visitor to the Caffrey home, Will Allenby had only ever seen Liam’s parents as a loving, affectionate couple — sometimes to a fault. The shouting match they’d just witnessed made for an unusual, if not amusing sideshow. 

While the couple stood there, glaring at each other, the two youngsters grew increasingly ill at ease. It was probably best to give them a little space so Caitlin led Will into the kitchen, watching as the young man took a seat at the table and began to work on his hot chocolate. She reached into the fridge for a can of pop and joined him; anything to get a little distance from the feuding couple.

‘Have you ever seen them like that?’ Will murmured with a head nod in the direction of the front door.

‘No. Never’ she whispered with a chuckle. ‘They’re usually all over each other.’

To say that Neal and Sara didn't argue was a slight exaggeration, to be sure. But for every squabble she’d witnessed her foster parents engaged in, there was an almost immediate make-out session that was just as passionate and intense.

Neal appeared, having apparently left Sara to her own devices. He could see the look of pure panic on Will’s face.

‘Sorry about that’ Neal mumbled with a shrug. ‘I guess she’s a little… excited about the new bed.’

Will giggled nervously; he thought of his own home life - no picnic at the best of times. ‘Believe me, I’ve seen much worse.’

‘Are you good with helping me bring the mattress down?’ Neal asked. ‘…once we finish our drinks?’

‘Yeah, yeah, of course. That’s why I’m here’ Will said.

‘NEAL!!!!’ came the shrill sound of Sara’s voice from upstairs.

Neal smiled at the kids - a forced smile if ever there was one. He put his cup down on the table and like a puppy who’d just piddled on the floor and was awaiting a stern scolding, he turned hesitantly towards the sound of his wife’s voice, preparing to investigate what had caused her to scream at the top of her lungs. Whatever it was, he was reasonably certain she would find a way to blame him for it.

‘Sounds like she’s still at it… Excuse me’ he muttered with an eyebrow wag.

It didn't take long to find out what had caused Sara to react so vehemently. When he stepped into their bedroom, Neal found her standing there clutching something with the very tip of her carefully manicured nails. She held the all too familiar object well away from her body as if she was afraid it might bite her. Her nose was turned up in obvious disdain and her eyes stared back at him. 

Daggers. 

He hadn't gotten up close and personal with a condom in quite some time but that didn't stop him from immediately recognizing said item as his eyes fixated on the object dangling from her hand. 

‘Gross!’ she declared, sounding like a three-year-old who was being forced to taste broccoli for the first time. ‘How the hell did that get stuck between the box spring and the headboard?’ 

Her voice was accusatory - although ostensibly, she would have been in the room when said item had been used originally. The fact that Neal had gotten a vasectomy ten years earlier made the discovery all the more disturbing; that thing had been there an awfully long time. 

He recalled all those times he’d been forced to wear a rubber before he'd finally given in to Sara’s pleas to do something more permanent on the birth control front. The sight of the crumpled sheath seemed to jog a distant memory: a particular Saturday night long ago when the Burkes had been over for dinner and drinks. The kids had both been at sleepovers and by the time Peter and Elizabeth had hailed a cab back to Brooklyn, the foursome had managed to put away three bottles of very good Riesling and a couple of stiff nightcaps. After stumbling up to bed, Sara had gone into seduction mode and Neal had hastily - and reluctantly - pulled on the condom before proceeding to ravage his wife on their conjugal bed. The encounter had been brief and rather… energetic and he recalled pulling the damn thing off, tying it off and momentarily setting it by his pillow while he caught his breath, He’d intended to get rid of it properly but, from all appearances, he must have fallen asleep - likely a deep, booze infused coma - unaware that the thing had slipped down between the box spring and the headboard, never to be seen again. 

Well, until now.

It was frightening to think the damn thing had been wedged in there all this time.

‘Ewwww!’ he grimaced at the sight of it. ‘That thing’s gotta be…’

‘At least ten years old’ she said, finishing his sentence.

She reached for a tissue and let the condom drop from her bright red fingertips onto it, her nose twitching in disgust.

‘Unless of course you’ve recently taken on a younger lover while I’ve been slaving away at work’ Neal teased, trying to lighten the mood.

Her attention wandered to another item, this one shiny. ‘Oh my God! I’ve been wondering where that earring disappeared to!’ she shouted as she pulled out a single drop earring. ‘I used to love these.’

‘What the hell is that?’ Neal asked with a frown as he pointed past a few wadded tissues and scraps of paper.  
There was a greenish piece of decayed food — or perhaps a small dead animal — tucked in between the headboard and where the box spring had been moments earlier.

‘Oh, that’s just nasty’ she said, shaking her head in disgust. ‘Pick it up.’

Neal stared back at her, just as repulsed. ‘No, you pick it up.’

She tittered. ‘No way! You!’  
Neal held his nose and, grabbing for a tissue, he plucked the small hunk of what had once been food - perhaps a piece of cheese or maybe a grape; in its present state of decomposition, it was impossible to know for sure.

‘Remember that night we had cheese and crackers in bed with that a bottle of champagne?’ he asked.

‘You mean, the night of our twentieth wedding anniversary?’

‘Uh huh’ he said with a grimace. 

‘Ewwww! That is sooooo gross!’

He held it up for examination and the look of sheer disgust on their faces melted away as they both dissolved into a fit of unrestrained laughter, Sara letting herself fall onto the area rug by the bed as she giggled irrepressibly. 

Neal joined her on the floor as they both thrashed around for a moment, the unexpected and raucous laughter serving to release the stress from all those pent up emotions.

‘That’s it’ Neal chuckled. ‘We are never bringing food up to bed again. Ever!’

Sara pouted. ‘Not even whipped cream?’ she asked with amusement. ‘I love it when you lick that stuff off my —’ 

‘NO! Not even whipped cream’ Neal replied with chuckle.

He leaned in and before they knew it, they were kissing, playfully at first, kisses interspersed with giggles and good natured shoving and tickling. The kiss deepened, the giggles morphing into soft moans and they began to flail about on the floor by the empty bed frame, groping each other with enthusiasm. 

They’d been at it a few minutes, the tension between them finally dissipating, when they heard soft footfalls and looked up to find Caitlin and Will standing in the doorway to their room, stunned by the sight of the older couple thrashing around on the floor in the throes of passion.

‘Hmm… Mr. Caffrey?’ Will said tentatively. ‘Did you want to move that mattress now?’

Sara and Neal sat there on the floor, mouths agape, staring back speechless.

Caitlin leaned in and covering her mouth, murmuring in Will’s ear. ‘See? I told you.’

TBC


	34. Chapter 34

The chill of the night air cut through them as Hope and Cameron were ushered the short distance between the house and the stables. Their eyes had been covered up for the full effect with both Lucy and Rhonda guiding their steps along the packed snow. Soft music was heard in the distance, growing louder with each step and by the time the four of them reached the creaky door to the stables, Hope recognized the soft voice of Harry Connick Jr. crooning the lyrics of some song which, although familiar, she could not name.

Hope felt Lucy’s arm in hers, guiding her as she heard the squeak of the barn door and felt the unfamiliar crunch of what was likely hay under her feet.

‘All right you two’ came another unexpected voice, that of Becky who, unbeknownst to Cam and Hope was already inside the stables, waiting for them. ‘You can take your blindfolds off now.’

The soft neighing of Cinnamon, Grace and the other two horses was heard nearby, almost as if they were in on the surprise, the sound starting out as a squeal and ending in a nicker.

The place looked nothing like it had two days earlier when Hope had last been there to suit up for her ill-fated horseback riding lesson. There were fairy lights up against the back wall, right behind a small round table which had absolutely no business being there — yet looked perfectly quaint. The table was set for two with a checkered table cloth, fine china, glassware and a bottle of wine in an orange coloured plastic pail doubling as an ice bucket. 

‘Where did you get those?’ Cam asked, pointing to the starry lights.

‘From the bin of Christmas decorations’ Lucy replied with pride.

‘We’ve made dinner for you’ Rhonda exclaimed. ‘You guys sit down and we’ll go get it.’

The two younger girls stepped out, taking care to close the door behind them, trapping the heat from the infrared gas heater. It did a reasonably good job of keeping the stables warm for the horses during the winter months and on this night, it would act as a furnace to keep the young lovers warm and toasty. 

‘Here, give me your coats’ Becky said, taking her brother by the arm.

She checked over her shoulder, making sure she wasn't being overheard by her younger siblings. ‘I know you two haven't had much time alone since you got here so I’ve got another little surprise for you’ she said, coaxing him towards one of the empty stalls.

Unbeknownst to her sisters, she had set up a discreet little corner should the young lovers want to linger a little after dinner. Set out over the hay was an air mattress, a blanket and throw pillows surrounded by a couple of battery operated lanterns - a perfect little love nest.

‘Don’t tell the girls - or Mom and Dad’ Becky whispered in Cam’s ear.

Cameron brought his arm around her shoulder and squeezed. ‘Looks like you’ve done this kind of thing before sis’ he teased. ‘Thanks, this is great.’

He and Hope were invited to sit at the table and Becky was pouring them each a glass of wine when the two younger girls returned with a crockpot and a shopping bag brimming with food.

‘It’s just macaroni and meat sauce’ Rhonda confessed sheepishly.

‘With Mom’s homemade rolls and butter and a cherry pie for dessert’ Lucy added.

‘We didn't have a lot of time to be very creative’ Rhonda explained, laying out the food on the small table.

The three Armstrong women stood there, looking rather pleased with themselves and their little surprise. Cam cleared his throat and grinned at them, waiting for them to take the hint.

‘Oh… yeah. I guess we should leave you alone’ Becky said, tugging on the arms of her two younger sisters.

‘Have fun!’ Lucy called out over her shoulder as she was dragged away.

WCWCWC

Sara was sitting up in the hide-a-bed with a stack of papers on her lap when Neal returned from having a shower, barefoot and wearing nothing but sleep pants and a t-shirt.

She looked up at him over her reading glasses and gave him an exaggerated pout as he turned out the lights in the kitchen and made his way over to join her.

‘I’m sorry… again’ she said for the umpteenth time.

Neal crawled in beside her and picked up the sales slip she’d left on the small table by the couch, pointing to the delivery date.

‘You know when you squint, it really _does_ look like a five’ he said, putting a good face on things.

The fact that she had misread the delivery date for their new bed had taken the wind out of her sails and she had been apologizing ever since dinner. A quick call to Jerrold’s Bed Emporium had confirmed that, in fact, the delivery of their brand new fancy schmacy bed was scheduled for February 6th and not the 5th. Consequently, unless they wanted to sleep on the hardwood floor in their room or lug the old mattress back into the house, they would be forced to make do with the much less comfortable hide-a-bed in their family room.

Neal had found the whole thing rather amusing but Sara had managed to get herself all worked up, first by arguing with the person at the other end of the phone before conceding that, once her glasses were securely perched on the end of her nose, the delivery date they’d agreed on was clearly legible. Eating humble pie was not among Sara’s favourite things but she did her best - first, apologizing to the poor, hapless clerk she had chewed out on the phone and then making amends to her poor husband for having nagged him into moving the old bed out of their bedroom twenty-four hours too soon.

As with most situations involving his wife, Neal had been quick to forgive, putting a good face on their little misadventure and telling her that it could have happened to anybody - which of course was a total fabrication but still, awfully sweet of him all the same.

‘It’s just like camping’ he said as he slipped in under the blankets.

He wagged his eyebrows at her, trying to make her laugh. ‘I could make us some smores if you want, set up a campfire.’

She gave him a playful slap on the arm, taking in the mischievous twinkle in his eye.

‘Look, there are worse things in life than having to spend a night on the hide-a-bed. As a matter of fact, I have fond memories of this here mattress’ he said, bouncing up and down on the bed and making the old springs creak.

‘Remember those first few weeks after I got shot? I seem to remember a few little frisky experiments on this bed… including one that involved chocolate pudding.’

She smiled at the recollection. Thank God she had such a considerate and understanding husband. She might lose it from time to time but he rarely did; another one of those wonderful characteristics that made Neal Caffrey so endearing.

She returned her attention to the pile of documents on her lap. ‘I guess this assignment at work has got me a little more rattled than I realized. This is the biggest account we’ve ever had and if I blow it, there’ll be hell to pay.’

‘Is that the famous list?’ Neal asked trying to get a peek at the pages she was holding in her hands.

‘Yeah, this is the addendum to Randy’s old insurance policy. Since this list was written up he’s made some new purchases and he’s gotten rid of some stuff. It’ll probably take me a couple of days to go through everything in his East Side apartment.’

Neal let out a low whistle. ‘Wow!’ he said, squinting to get a good look at the long list of treasures. ‘He’s got some pretty amazing stuff there.’

‘Hey, keep your eyes to yourself, Caffrey’ Sara said, pulling it away. ‘This is confidential stuff.’

Something had caught his eye - although it was hard to tell for sure without his glasses.

‘Oh yeah?’ he said playfully, attempting to wrestle it from her.

Her half-moon reading glasses slipped off her nose, landing in her lap and Neal placed a kiss on her cheek in an effort to get a better glimpse at the top page.

She melted and sighed.

He attempted to peek once more but he wasn’t getting anywhere without his own glasses. He gave up and let himself fall on his pillow.

‘It’s getting late babe’ he murmured.

‘You’re right’ she acknowledged, collecting her glasses and the pile of documents and setting them by the side of the couch.

She reached over and turned off the lamp by the couch as they settled in the bed - definitely a substandard mattress, thin and lumpy. And noisy. Even if Neal had been up to it, any extracurricular activity on this bed would likely have woken up the whole house - and perhaps the neighbours as well.

‘Ugh. I hope our backs survive’ she complained, settling into his arms.

To his silence, she continued. ‘Maybe we should go shopping to replace this old thing. We’ve had it for… I don’t remember how long.’

‘Oh no you don’t. You are _not_ dragging me out to shop for a hide-a-bed. Shopping for our new mattress was painful enough. Besides, you have better taste in these things than I do.’

That, of course, was an absolute lie but nonetheless, Sara took the compliment and pressed her cheek against her husband’s chest, curling up for their usual end of the day debrief.

‘Caitlin looks pretty settled, huh?’ she said. ‘I think she’s over the worst of it.’

‘Yeah, I’m hoping she’s not faking it. But what’s going to happen when Jesse gets it touch with her again, which he inevitably will.’

‘I think you should give her some credit. She’s wiser than you think. She’s getting ready to start university… she doesn't want to mess all that up.’

‘So, how did Liam seem to you?’ she asked, switching it up. It wasn't bedtime unless the Caffreys talked about their kids, what challenges they were facing, what they were up to.

As he always did, Neal had caught his son’s basketball game against the Boston Terriers online, his eyes glued to his son for any obvious signs of fallout from the rough few days he’d just had. He’d noticed none. Liam had had a great game, had been high scorer for his team in fact. If this thing with Todd had been on his mind, it hadn't been apparent in the way he’d played.

‘He looked great on the court but… who knows. He said he’d give us a call tomorrow when he gets back to Syracuse. Any news from Hope?’

‘Not since yesterday. She said she went horseback riding with Cameron’s sister.’

Neal chuckled. ‘I would have paid to see that, I wonder who was more stubborn, her or the horse.’

He grew silent for a moment. ‘Maybe it’ll give her some new material to work with… it’s pretty up there in winter. She’s always had a really great eye for landscapes.’

‘Oh, and she asked if we’re going to be home tomorrow night’ Sara added as an afterthought.

‘Do you think they’re finally ready to come clean about a wedding date?’

‘Could be… she was pretty adamant about making sure we’d be home’ Sara replied. ‘Can you believe it Neal? Our baby girl is getting married.’

He grew quiet for a moment, perhaps imagining himself walking her down the aisle. ‘It seems like just yesterday we moved into this house.’

He felt Sara nodding against his chest. ‘Do you remember our first night? There was stuff all over the place. Hope woke up and started crying and she ended up in bed with us.’

Neal chuckled. ‘She was babbling like crazy. More pig headed than a mule… I was trying to get her to say ‘mama’.’

‘And I’d been teaching her how to say ‘poppa’.’

‘So damn stubborn… still is’ Neal said with a chuckle. ‘What was it she ended up saying that first time?’

‘It was some garbled version of ‘elephant’, remember? Peter had given her that stuffed pink elephant and she was reaching for it from her crib.’

Neal nodded. ‘Oh yeah, I remember. That thing must have gone through the washer and dryer dozens of times.’

‘It’s no wonder, she used to drag it around with her everywhere she went.’

They both grew pensive.

‘And now, she’s getting married’ Sara said, her voice tight.

Things were getting a little too melancholic for her taste. ‘So, are you all right with Peter’s big news?’

She felt him shrugging. ‘I guess it was inevitable at some point. I just didn't think the day would come so soon.’

‘So soon? Honey, Peter is seventy-three years old. Most people have already retired by that age.’

‘I know, I know… but Peter’s not most people. I still think of him as strapping, gun-toting Peter…

Sara chuckled. ‘Well, even strapping, gun-toting Peter is getting older and so are we.’

Neal was obviously not ready to go down that road and he grew quiet, his breathing beginning to even out.

She thought he’d already fallen asleep when he spoke once more. ‘What do you want for dinner tomorrow night?’

‘I don’t know… maybe chicken’ she replied without much enthusiasm.

He sighed. ‘Okay… chicken it is.’

‘How about that recipe with rice and mushrooms? I really like that one.’

‘Sure’ he replied, kissing the top of her head. ‘Well, g’night Repo.’

‘Goodnight Neal.’

WCWCWC

Over in Brooklyn, a similar scene was playing out as the Burkes prepared for bed. Elizabeth threw the blankets off the bed and climbed in, looking slightly annoyed.

‘It’s almost as if you’re having second thoughts’ she told her husband.

‘Of course not, honey. I’m not having second thoughts. It’s just… it was hard to tell him, that’s all.’

‘But he took it well, right?’

‘Yeah, yeah. I don’t think he was totally taken off guard. Had you told Sara about it?’

Elizabeth avoided his probing gaze. ‘I might have mentioned it to her. I told her I was selling Burke Premiere Events.’

He nodded. ‘Well, I think he was expecting me to tell him I was cutting down on my hours but he seemed surprised to hear I was calling it quits.’

‘But you said Cameron is ready to take over, right?’

‘Yeah, yeah. That’ll be Neal’s decision to make but… yeah, Cameron could easily manage the day to day at the gallery. I could teach him how to do the books, he’s smart, he’ll learn.’

He settled in the bed next to her and Elizabeth perched herself on her elbow, a smile on her face. She ran her finger down the front of his pyjama, stopping to fiddle with one of the buttons.

‘Oh, honey, it’s so exciting! We can finally start planning our future.’

Peter forced a smile. ‘What do you want to plan? You want to go on a trip?’

She let herself fall back on her pillow, her eyes dreamy. ‘We can go anywhere we want. How about that tour of the Greek Islands we always talked about taking?’

‘Greece, huh? That could be nice.’

Surprisingly, he felt a smile creeping in. In that moment, Peter thought that maybe this wasn't such a crazy idea after all. 

WCWCWC

Making love to the sound of horses neighing nearby was a brand new experience for Hope Ellis-Caffrey. Cameron didn't seem the least bit distracted and she wondered if he’d done this kind of thing before. Once they’d settled for a post-coital cuddle, she couldn't help but ask.

‘You ever… make out in the stables before?’

His slight hesitation told her all she needed to know.

‘Who was she?’

‘You know, that girl I told you about… the one I dated during my last two years of high school.’

‘Janet something or other?’

‘Jeannette. She moved here from Montreal. She taught me French. Voulez-vous coucher avec moi?’ he said with the worst accent she’d ever heard.

Hope giggled. ‘I think that was Lady Marmalade but… nice try. So, what was she like?’

‘Jeannette? She was nice. Sweet, quiet, shy. We’d hang out, go horseback riding. I think Becky still hangs out with her.’

Hope felt a little twinge of jealousy. ‘Have you seen her since?’

‘Not since I moved to New York’ he replied, squeezing her shoulder. ‘What’s this sudden interest in my life before I met you.'

‘I don’t know, just curious I guess. So, was she your first?’

‘Hope!’ Cam said, pulling away to get a good look in her eyes. ‘I really don't want to talk about my ex-girlfriend while I’m holding you in my arms. Besides, you dated a few guys before we started seeing each other. What about that Justin guy you told me about.’

‘I was like thirteen, Cam. The truth is I wasn't all that keen on guys until I met you. There was just too much going on in my life to sit around and pine over some guy. Anyway…’ she said, bringing her hand up and admiring her ring, ‘… you’re the only one for me.’

He took her hand in his, gazing at the sparkling diamond and bringing it to his lips. ‘So, tomorrow’s the night we tell our folks.’

‘I was thinking we could make dinner for your mom and dad. You know, thank them for their generosity. We could tell them over dessert. I already told my folks we’d be calling home.’

‘How’d that go over?’

‘My mom tried to pry it out of me. I think she suspects that we came up here to tell your parents in person. But the whole church thing will be a surprise.’

‘My folks will be really happy when we tell them we’re having a church wedding’ Cam said with a soft smile.

‘Speaking of which, did you remember to tell Father Bertrand we wouldn’t make it to class this week?’

‘Uh huh, he said it was fine. It was a discussion on birth control. I promised him we’d do some research on our own’ he said with a laugh.

Hope nuzzled his chest. ‘Well, mission accomplished’ she said naughtily.

Outside the small red building, came the muffled sound of an engine, growing louder, followed a few seconds later by the unmistakeable sound of voices. Cam sat up suddenly and threw off the blanket they’d been cuddling under. He was instantly on his feet, pulling Hope up and grabbing for their clothes.

‘That’s my folks, they’re home!’ he called out in a panic.

WCWCWC

_Neal adjusted his vest and glanced over towards the two tables he was tending to. The first one was occupied by two grey-haired gentlemen in their mid to late sixties, serious types who had been discussing business since they first sat down. One of them was on his third Kettle One and Sprite while the other man had been drinking from a bottle of 1998 Chateau Montelena, a modest choice at $390 a pop. Neal pegged them for lawyers, discussing some upcoming merger from what his curious ears had been able to glean._

_The second table he was serving on this particular night, however, was the one that had truly captured his attention. By the window, with a breathtaking view of Central Park and its lit fountain, sat a power couple in their mid to late forties. Neal had immediately recognized the man as Randall Piper, a high tech magnate he’d seen on more than one occasion in the high society pages. As a server at Per Se, one of the most exclusive restaurants in Manhattan, Neal made it his business to know his clientele as best he could. He’d seen the man dining in their establishment on a couple of occasions although he’d never been assigned his table. One thing was for sure, he’d never laid eyes on the woman before - of that he was certain. She was breathtakingly beautiful and he would surely remember her if she’d ever stepped into his orbit._

_‘Who’s the woman with Piper?’ he asked his colleague as the two waiters stood behind a divider, waiting to be summoned._

_‘That’s his new wife, Sara Ellis or should I say, Sara Piper. She’s an insurance investigator for a firm here in the city. Did you catch that ring on her finger? That thing is a whopping sixteen carats, worth about half a mil. And when you get closer, check out that necklace she’s wearing. I read somewhere it clocked in at $750,000. It was his wedding gift to her. That and a new place in the Hamptons.’_

_The man disappeared to tend to his own tables, leaving Neal to ponder what he’d just heard. He glanced in the direction of the newlyweds, noticing the couple staring into each other’s eyes as they sipped a bottle of pre-dinner champagne. He glanced down at the label: Krug, Reims, a champagne rosé that would set the guy back just short of five hundred bucks. Considering that’s about what he racked up in tips on any given week, he couldn't help but be envious. He thought of the can of tuna and wilted lettuce that awaited him back at his studio apartment in Alphabet City and sighed._

_The woman couldn't seem to tear her eyes away from her new husband and Neal watched as she threw her head back and laughed throatily, sending a shiver down his spine. Her deep voice resonated in the small space and her eyes, the colour of emeralds shone in the candlelight. She looked amazing and if Neal believed in such things, he might think he was falling in love at first sight._

_Randall Piper lifted his hand nonchalantly to summon him and Neal immediately returned to their side._

_‘Yes sir’ he said, awaiting orders._

_The man gestured to his new wife’s glass which was half empty and Neal proceeded to refill it. He leaned in and caught a whiff of perfume emanating from the gorgeous redhead; a sweet, intoxicating scent of citrus. He inhaled deeply and felt his pulse quicken._

_‘Darling, you're so thoughtful’ the woman said, squeezing her husband’s hand._

_Up close, the woman was even more exquisite than from afar, her raven hair perfectly coiffed, revealing an exquisite swan-like neck and slender shoulders. Diamonds shimmered from her both her neck and wrist, leaving no doubt as to their value. She wore a simple yet striking cocktail dress in écru and Neal’s eyes were drawn to her cleavage as she leaned forward to reach for her glass._

_The man seemed annoyed and cleared his throat, drawing Neal’s attention._

_‘Is there are problem?’ he asked curtly._

_‘No, no. Of course not sir’ Neal stuttered. ‘Are you ready to order?’_

_Sara looked coyly at her husband and blew him a kiss. ‘What do you think, darling? Shall we go for the nine course chef’s tasting menu? I’m dying to try the gougères and the smoked salmon with crême fraîche._

_‘Whatever you want, my love’ the millionaire replied._

_He turned to look at Neal. ‘Please send the sommelier over and let him know we’d like a bottle of Château Lafite-Rothschild. Do you have a 1982?’_

_Neal’s eyes popped out of his head. He knew that the restaurant only had two such bottles and they sold for $8,800 apiece._

_‘Oh, Randy. You know how much I love the ’82’ the man’s wife said, fawning over him._

_Neal sighed and Piper gave him a look of annoyance._

_‘Well, why are you standing there, looking at us? Get busy. You heard my wife, we’ll have the nine-course meal. Chop chop!’_

_‘Yes sir, of course’ Neal said, adjusting the cloth napkin on his arm and backing away._

_His eyes remained trained on the woman, unable to stop staring and he backed right into a champagne bucket, upsetting it and sending it’s contents flying onto the floor._

_‘You idiot!’ someone called out as Neal scrambled to recover._

_‘What the hell is the matter with you man?’ his fellow server asked when Neal returned to the serving station. ‘Your first course is up.’_

_Neal picked up the covered dish of oysters with pearl tapioca the restaurant had dubbed ‘Oysters and Pearls’ and headed back to the table where the newlyweds were still making goo-goo eyes at each other._

_He placed the dish in front of Sara, opening it with a flourish as she stared down in disdain at its contents, definitely not the crustacean and fish eggs she’d been expecting._

_‘Ugh!’ she cried out. ‘What is_ that _?’_

_‘It’s the chicken with rice and mushrooms you ordered’ he said as he watched her stare back haughtily._

_‘That’s disgusting’ she declared._

_Neal frowned. He could have sworn she’d asked for chicken with mushrooms and rice._

_‘But… but Mrs. Piper.’_

‘Neal! Neal!’ he heard as he was shaken from his sleep.

‘Mrs. Piper… Mrs. Piper… Mrs. Piper….’ he repeated, over and over again.

Sara reached over to turn on the bedside lamp. ‘Neal! Neal! Wake up! You’re dreaming.’

She hovered over him, her brow furrowed. He was covered in sweat, his breathing off the charts. He blinked, taking in his surroundings, surprised to find he was in his bed - or at least a bed in his own home, with his own wife.

‘What —? Sara!’ he called out breathlessly. He touched her cheek as if to check that she was real.

‘What is it? What’s wrong? And who the hell is Mrs. Piper?’

Neal blinked a few more times as he realized it was all just a silly dream. His heart was still pumping to beat the band. He pulled Sara in to him, holding her tightly against his chest.

‘You’re here’ he murmured, relieved.

‘Of course I’m here. Where else would I be?’

The strange dream began to slowly fade, remnants lingering just beneath his conscious mind.

He took a few steadying breaths, coming back to reality.

‘Maybe… maybe salmon for dinner tomorrow night’ he said breathlessly.

TBC


	35. Chapter 35

On Sunday, February 6th, a brand new mattress and box spring were delivered to 4788 Meadowbrook Street in White Plains, a man visited his ailing mother in New Rochelle, a group of young basketball players settled in for a five hour bus ride from Boston to Syracuse and a young couple prepared dinner for a family of nine.

Hope had never been much of a cook. Her dad liked to tease her that she was a graduate of the Sara Ellis School of Cooking - which wasn't saying much. When called upon to perform magic in the kitchen, she tended to stick to the basics: pasta, chicken, salads or frozen prepared meals. Her fiancé, who had a slightly more elaborate repertoire - and a more discriminating palate - had long ago accepted that, in their relationship, and following in the footsteps of his in-laws, he was destined to be the main cook and bottle-washer once they finally tied the knot.

He’d suggested lasagna, Caesar salad with homemade croutons and an apple crisp with ice cream for dessert. The menu was more in deference to his father’s simple taste in food than anything else. Fred Armstrong, having grown up on this very land, liked to stick to the basics: put him in front of a large t-bone steak and baked potato or mashed potatoes and meatloaf and the guy was a happy camper. 

After marrying the former Bonnie Gentry, his palate had gradually evolved to include a few more what he liked to call ‘ethnic’ options, notably Italian favourites such as spaghetti with meat sauce, gnocchi (something he loved to eat but could not pronounce) and veal scaloppine, one of his wife’s most successful dishes. Such culinary delights as tajine, naan bread, hummus, pad thai, falafel and shish taouk were still way beyond his comfort zone but, hey… baby steps.

Cameron was whipping out the bread maker from underneath the kitchen counter when Hope appeared, carrying a couple of pounds of ground beef from the second refrigerator the Armstrongs kept in their cold room.

‘We’re making bread?’ she asked, her voice rising up an octave.

‘Yeah, it’s easy. I’ve seen my mom make it dozens of times.’

Hope’s eyes grew to the size of saucers. Over the years, she’d watched her dad make muffins, cakes, cookies and other baked goods but she couldn't remember him ever making bread from scratch.

‘Isn’t it… hard to make?’ she asked.

Cameron gave her a puzzled look and fiddled with the knobs on the front of the machine. ‘Easy peasy. All we need to decide is if we want to make country white, cheese or multigrain.’

‘Okay…’ Hope said with a shrug. Who was she to complain when fresh bread was in the offing?

He pointed to the nearby counter. ‘I took out the recipe for the apple crumble. Do you want to get started on peeling those apples?’

‘Sure’ she said, taking a step closer and purposefully crowding him. She gave him a quick hip check and he glanced over at her with a boyish grin. 

‘You’re in a good mood’ he commented.

‘Yeah well, last night was… nice.’

‘If you call running through the yard and sneaking in through the back door in our boots and underwear fun…’ he countered with a smirk.

‘I was talking about what happened before we went streaking through the yard but, hey…’

For a guy who held down a full time job, paid rent on an apartment, drove his own car and otherwise acted like a responsible adult, it had been amusing to watch the sheer horror on his face when he’d realized his mommy and daddy were about to catch him with his pants down, doing the nasty. 

‘You know you’ve got some moves there, babe’ he whispered. ‘I didn't know you could take those stairs two at a time like that.’

She giggled. ‘I woke up with some hay still stuck in my hair but I managed to clean myself up before your mom came snooping.’

Cameron seemed to take offence to her last comment. Like pretty well every other red-blooded man on the planet, he didn't take kindly to any derogatory remarks about his sainted mother.

‘She’s just… looking out for me, that’s all’ he mumbled.

Hope looked over her shoulder, making sure they were alone. She grabbed for Cam’s butt cheeks, squeezing as he pulled away, seemingly horrified. 

‘Hope! Stop it!’ 

She chuckled; he could be such a wuss. ‘What? You afraid I might corrupt you? Or maybe your mommy will send you off to bed without dessert.’

Cam’s nose was definitely out of joint. ‘Look, this is just the way it is around here. I’ll admit my parents are a little… straight-laced.’

She rolled her eyes at the understatement of the year. ‘Is that what you call it? Straight-laced?’

Cam’s eyes narrowed as he leaned down to grab the sack of flour from underneath the kitchen counter. 

Hope leaned in to whisper. ‘What do you suppose they’d say if they knew we sleep together?’

‘Oh, they know we sleep together’ he replied with a decisive nod.

‘Then, why did you act like the sky was falling when they came home and almost found us making out.’

He scoffed. ‘Knowing is one thing, having to witness it is another.’

‘That’s the height of hypocrisy’ she whined.

Cameron opened the large sack of flour and measured out a cup. ‘Maybe so but… that’s how they are and we need to respect that.’

He placed his hands over his eyes, ears and mouth and Hope laughed. ‘Oh, I get it, see no evil…’

‘Hear no evil, speak no evil’ he said, finishing the proverbial principle.

He stopped what he was doing and turned to face her, his hand gently caressing her cheek. 

‘Look, the next time we visit, we’ll be married and Mom and Dad will roll out the welcome mat, probably insist we take their bed and give us all the privacy we want. We can make out ’til the cows come home and they won’t say a word.’

Hope cleared her throat. ‘All right’ she said with a sigh. 

He kissed the tip of her nose. ‘It’s just the way it is around here.’

‘What’s just the way it is around here?’ came Bonnie Armstrong’s voice.

Cameron grew flustered and Hope came to his rescue. ‘Cam was telling me that you always have a big meal on Sunday nights.’

‘Not always, honey’ Bonnie said to her son. ‘How can I help?’

Hope dropped what she was doing and walked over, taking her future mother-in-law by the shoulders and pointing her out of the kitchen.

‘You can go sit down and relax, put your feet up for a change.’

‘Relax?’ the woman said. ‘I’m not sure how to do that.’

‘Well, you can read, watch television, do some knitting, whatever you want but Cameron and I are making dinner so, scoot.’

The woman smiled and let herself be led out of the kitchen.

‘Go on, Ma’ Cameron called out after her. ‘I’ll even bring you a glass of wine.’

‘Ooooh, wine!’ Bonnie Armstrong said with a girlish laugh. ‘And it’s not even Christmas.’

WCWCWC

‘You know, I would have been perfectly happy with any old bed but you know Sara. She wasn't satisfied until she tried every single mattress in the greater New York City area. Twice. So, like I said, the bed never came yesterday and we ended up having to spend the night on the hide-a-bed in the family room and now my back’s sore’ Neal said, wrapping up the long sordid tale of what had happened the day before.

He rubbed his backside for emphasis and glanced in his mother’s direction, noticing she was sound asleep once more. She’d been awake when he’d started telling the story but now there was a soft rumble emanating from her lips as Linda Bennett snored softly.

Despite his desire to keep his mom sheltered from the harshness of life, Neal would often use his visits to Blue Skies to blather on about those annoying little things in his life, those day to day frustrations as a gallery owner, art school director, dad and husband. He would use his mom as a sounding board, often mistakenly thinking she was sound asleep as he droned on in great detail as he'd just been doing for the past half hour. He would share his thoughts, his worries under the mistaken impression that she couldn't hear him - which was not always the case. On more than one occasion, she’d piped up unexpectedly and offered him some advice or made a comment, making it obvious she’d heard everything.

He carried on with unloading his woes.

‘Sara’s going to this guy’s place this week to inventory his stuff. Right! He’s probably waiting to ambush her with some expensive bottle of wine and an overpriced dinner from some obscenely lavish restaurant. I really don’t know why I let him get to me… as far as I know he hasn't behaved inappropriately but still… you know, Sara’s a beautiful woman and it’s not like she’s getting any at home at the moment.’

‘You know, I could have given her that kind of life if I’d wanted to’ he continued with a frown. 

‘Who am I kidding? I’d be in prison if I tried to give Sara the kind of stuff this guy has… jewelry, fine dining, a summer place up in the Hamptons. It’s just not fair, you know… Sara deserves so much more than our little house in the suburbs.’

His mind wandered, his mouth barely keeping up. ‘I’ve been thinking of getting a dye job, do you think that would be a good idea?’ he asked the comatose woman as he ran his hand through his locks. ‘Make me look a little less… washed out. This guy, Piper, he’s got jet black hair, not a grey speck in sight. Probably sees his colourist every week.’

He stopped to catch his breath and make sure she couldn't hear him. He let his voice drop to a murmur. ‘We still haven’t… you know, had sex since before New Years. Shit! I haven't had sex this year’ he said with a head shake as he realized just how long it had been. 

‘I’m scared to try. I know it’s stupid. Sara’s been a good sport about it but… how long is she going to put up with me… not putting out. I want to but I don’t want to fall flat on my face in the middle of it, you know. It’s easier to just avoid it for the time being.’

He glanced at her again just to make sure she couldn't hear him. ‘I suppose I could practice on my own, see if I can get over the goal line. Yeah, maybe I’ll try that, see how that works out.’ 

Linda let out a particularly loud snort and woke up, startled which in turn startled Neal, considering what he’d just been sharing.

‘What did you say, honey?’ she asked.

‘Nothing, nothing Mom’ he said as he helped her sit up and fluffed her pillow.

He glanced at his watch. ‘Dinner should be here any minute. Are you sure you don’t want to eat in the dining room tonight? It might do you good to see some of the other residents. I’m in no rush. I could take you, we could use the wheelchair and I could sit with you.’

She waved her hand, dismissing the suggestion. Except for using the toilet, she hadn't been out of her bed in days. Neal ran his hand over her soft, grey hair and smiled down at her. She was looking particularly fragile and it hit him again just how vulnerable she was in this state.

‘You sure Mom?’

Her voice, when she spoke - which was less and less often - was weak and washed out and Neal didn't like it one bit. She’d been on a roller-coaster these past few weeks, a few good days followed by periods where she slept most of the time and barely said a word. The oxygen mask she wore was now a permanent fixture, especially following her bout of pneumonia which the doctor had been reticent to declare completely resolved. Just when she seemed to be on the mend, her fever would spike again and she’d have a few days of horrible coughing, wearing herself out. 

‘Caitlin…’ she said, trying to catch her breath.

‘Caitlin’s fine. She’s working at the coffee shop ’til seven but she said she’d drop by and help you get ready for bed.’

That seemed to bring a smile to her lips. ‘Hope…’ she said.

‘Hope and Cam are still upstate visiting Cam’s parents. They’re supposed to call after dinner, apparently they have some big news for us.’

‘Baby?’ she whispered breathlessly.

‘No! No! Of course not. I think they’ve settled on a date for their wedding and they want to tell all of us at the same time.’

Linda nodded and her eyes fluttered shut.

Watching his mom gradually fade away was hard for him to witness. She was still smart and quick-witted — a trait she shared with her daughter-in-law. But lately she seemed to be losing her zest for life. Neal watched her chest rise and fall with difficulty, each breath seemingly a fierce battle. He was forever grateful that he’d managed to move her to New York where he could watch over her these last few years. The thought of her left to die all alone in St. Louis was more than he could bear. 

He was just about to ease her back down on the bed when she spoke again, as if their conversation hadn't just ended abruptly.

‘How’s our boy?’ she murmured.

‘Liam’s fine, Mom. School’s good, basketball’s good. He’s getting good grades.’

‘Did he make up with that boy?’ she asked breathlessly.

The boy she was referring to was Cody Miller - Liam’s main squeeze all through high school. She would have no idea about Liam’s more recent dalliances with Todd Greenway - or the drama that was unfolding four hours north in Syracuse. Neal and Sara purposefully kept her out of the loop when it came to the daily ins and outs of the kids lives. To be honest, at times, even he had trouble keeping up. And besides she didn't need to know the intricacies of their loves lives and their daily struggles - or his and Sara’s for that matter. The broad strokes were more than enough for her to handle. 

The exception had been the turmoil surrounding Jesse’s visit; Caitlin had been unable to resist confiding in her grandmother, sharing her disappointment at what she’d deemed a betrayal of the worst kind. She’d also needed to debrief about what she’d learned about Neal’s past, badgering her grandmother for details about her foster dad as a young boy. With that secret out in the open, Linda had been forthcoming about the role she’d played in pushing her son away, how she’d prayed that someday they would reunite and how her dreams had come true against all odds when Neal had chosen to welcome her back into his life. One might have thought that these confessions would have put a damper on their close relationship but the contrary had been true; the two women had further bonded as they’d talked about Neal, then and now.

‘No, no. Liam’s not with Cody anymore. Remember Mom, I told you they broke up when Liam went away to university.’

She nodded, creases appearing on her forehead. He’d noticed that, as sharp as she’d once been, she was having more and more trouble with her short term memory. Her eyes fluttered shut once more and Neal sat back, settling in to watch her sleep.

Before long the attendant showed up carrying a tray of food. She placed it on a nearby table.

‘Will you make sure she eats something?’ the woman whispered as he nodded.

The disturbance wasn't enough to rouse her from her sleep and Neal reached out and took her hand, squeezing it.

‘Hey Mom’ he murmured. ‘You hungry? Dinner’s here.’

She smiled back wanly. Despite her total lack of appetite, he knew she’d make the effort to have a few bites.

Just for him.

WCWCWC

The phone calls came as expected, shortly after nine o’clock. First came Liam, letting them know he’d arrived safely back in Syracuse after a successful road trip. He and his dad did their usual post-game analysis and then the conversation turned to the fallout from the situation with Todd.

‘The guys were great’ Liam said. ‘We went out for a drink after the game last night and we played some pool. It helped.’

‘What time is your appointment at the counselling centre tomorrow?’ Sara asked.

‘Ten o’clock’ he replied, his voice tentative. ‘You know, I’ve been thinking… maybe I don’t really need to go.’

Sara and Neal, who had been listening on speaker phone, exchanged worried looks and when Sara opened her mouth to speak, Neal put up his hand to stop her.

‘That’s entirely up to you, buddy’ he said as he inhaled deeply. ‘But sometimes it helps to have somebody to talk things out with.’

If anybody knew the benefits of getting support during a crisis, it was Neal. Never much of a navel gazer himself, he had nonetheless developed a newfound respect for mental health professionals and the support they could provide in helping you through a trying time. Following Sara’s kidnapping and sexual assault, he’d had to drag her kicking and screaming to Marion Birch’s office. The therapist’s encouragement and sage advice had been crucial in helping Sara heal from the trauma but surprisingly, the joint sessions they’d attended with the woman had been just as beneficial for Neal as he tried to support his wife through the aftermath of her ordeal. 

Little had he known at the time that he would require the woman’s services to help him through his own crisis following Hope’s horrific accident. It had taken a brutal intervention by friends and family before he’d agreed to consult Marion and, eventually, Jim McDougall, his addiction counsellor. When all was said and done, asking - and accepting - help had saved him from himself and had been an essential part of his healing.

Hopefully his son would figure that out before he got himself in too deep.

‘You know, if it hadn't been for Jim and Marion, I’m not sure how things would have played out for me’ Neal said, laying himself bare. ‘Sometimes, just talking things out can help you organize your thoughts, make things a little clearer.’

‘I suppose…’ Liam said, considering his dad’s sage advice. 

There was silence on the line for a moment. ‘All right, I’ll go. But just this once.’

Sara reached out to squeeze Neal’s arm and smiled up at him. ‘That’s a good plan, honey.’

‘You know, things are pretty quiet at the school right now’ Neal said - a bald-faced lie. ‘I could come down for a day or two… I’ve been dying for some of Caruso’s bucatini.’

‘Naw, I’ve got classes all week. I’m fine Dad’ Liam said, his voice faraway. ‘How’s Grandma doing?’

Neal hesitated for a brief moment. ‘She’s holding her own’ he replied soberly.

‘So, has Hope called with the big news yet?’ Liam asked, changing gears.

The couple exchanged knowing looks; sounded like Hope had confided in her brother about her upcoming nuptials. Maybe if they played their cards right, they could get the goods ahead of time.

‘It’s exciting, huh?’ Neal attempted, deflecting.

‘Nice try Dad. You’re not getting anything out of me’ he chuckled.

Sara gave her husband an exaggerated eye roll; apparently, the kids could see right through him.

‘Well, call if you need anything, okay buddy? I can be there in just a few hours.’

‘I will. Love you guys’ Liam said from across the miles.

‘We love you, honey’ Sara called out before hanging up.

Luckily, Hope’s call came almost immediately on the heels of their conversation with Liam and the couple settled in side by side, in their brand new bed with Hope and Cam on speaker phone. Hope told them all about the mural she and the girls had painted and the meal she and Cam had shared in the stables the night before. She left out their hundred meter dash back to the house in their skivvies - and the reason why they’d had to make it in the first place and instead talked about the meal they’d just shared with the extended Armstrong clan - including Becky’s boyfriend who had joined the family for dinner.

‘Dad, we should get a bread maker. It’s super easy’ Hope enthused. ‘You can even make raisin bread.’

‘All right, sweet pea’ Neal chuckled in response to her enthusiasm. ‘I’ll look into that.’

He knew her time living at home was short, hell, she was barely ever home as it was. If getting a bread maker could keep her home a little longer, he’d gladly invest in buying one and learning how to use it.

‘How are things at the gallery?’ Cameron asked. ‘Is Mr. Burke coping all right without us.’

‘Yeah, yeah, everything’s fine’ Neal replied. This was not the time to share Peter’s big news; there’d be plenty of time to tell them when they got home. 

‘Anyway, Mom, Dad’ Hope began, her voice slowing for emphasis. ‘C-C-Cam and I wanted to tell you that we’ve finally set a date.’

‘For the wedding’ she added, as if there was any doubt as to what she was talking about.

There was silence down in White Plains as Neal and Sara held their breath.

‘We’ve booked a church for May 22nd.’

Both Sara and Neal let out a yelp as the words sunk in. A church wedding… that was an unexpected wrinkle.

‘That’s wonderful, honey!’ Sara called out.

‘Congratulations kids!’ Neal added.

‘We’re going to have a busy few months ahead of us. Maybe your mom and I can talk, Cam. See how we can help you guys’ Sara offered.

‘That sounds great Mrs. Caffrey, I’ll let her know.’

There was some hootin’ and hollerin’ in the background; obviously they were all celebrating the happy news up in Watertown.

‘Well, we better go’ Hope said. ‘They’re waiting on us for dessert. Dad, tell Uncle Peter we’ll be back at the gallery on Thursday morning.’

‘Will do!’ Neal replied. ‘Take care you two.’

‘Bye Daddy, bye Mom. Love you.’

‘We love you too, sweetie!’

The line went dead and the couple sat up in bed, staring at each other for a moment as they let the news sink in. Although it had been a long engagement, it was about to come to an end. Soon their little girl would be getting married, she’d become someone’s wife and live in her own home, away from them. She would likely have children of her own at some point down the line and the circle of life would continue whether they were ready for it or not.

Sara made some weird throaty sound and Neal looked over, watching as her eyes filled with tears.

‘Awww babe, don’t cry’ he said, wrapping his arms around her. ‘She’s happy.’

‘So am I’ Sara said blubbering.

Neal smiled and drew her in tighter. He knew exactly how she felt; that bittersweet feeling as the most precious person in your universe took on a life of her own, completely separate from you, no longer requiring your stewardship in order to face the ups and downs of everyday life. It was time to set her free and let her live life as she chose. Their job as parents was coming to an end - at least as far as they’d always known it. Liam and Hope, and Caitlin for that matter, would forever be a part of their lives and both Neal and Sara would always be there for them but it was time to let them fly with their own wings and let them make the choices they saw fit. Their role was now relegated to cheering them on, being their safety net, offering advice when asked and just sitting back proudly and watching them live their best lives; the lives they were destined to live.

‘It’s okay sweetheart’ he murmured, feeling his throat tighten. 

She pulled away and looked at him, sniffling. ‘We have a wedding to plan’ she said, reverting to type.

He laughed. ‘We do. Whatever she and Cam want… it’s fine with me.’

‘I wasn't expecting it to be a church wedding but I guess it makes sense. That’s obviously important to Cam’s family.’

Neal nodded. ‘I can’t remember the last time I was in a church.’

‘June’s funeral?’

‘Maybe.’

‘It’ll be a happy occasion this time.’

‘Yup’ he agreed. ‘Really happy.’

Sara slipped down into the bed, their spanking brand new bed.

‘Mmmmm. This is super comfy, isn't it?’

Neal gently bounced up and down. Frankly, he found it a little too firm for his taste but he wasn't about to admit it. 

Ever.

‘Yeah’ he fibbed. ‘Really nice.’

‘So…’ she said, curling up against her husband. ‘What is it you were holding back when Liam asked about Linda?’

Neal thought he'd been pretty good about obfuscating the truth; apparently not where his wife was concerned. He lay there, drawing imaginary circles on her shoulder and arm. She felt his body tense.

‘She signed a DNR.’

‘Really?’ Sara thought about the consequences. ‘Wow… if she’d had one in place when she went into the hospital before Christmas, they wouldn't have treated her and she’d be gone.’

‘Tell me about it.’ 

Truth was, it was the head nurse of Blue Skies who had intercepted Neal on his way out and informed him that his mom had signed the legal document, stating that should her heart give out, she did not want to be resuscitated. Furthermore, she had informed the staff at the nursing home that from now on, she would be refusing any treatment or medication which had the sole purpose of prolonging her life.

Sara perched herself up on her elbow so she could look into her husband’s eyes.

‘Are you okay with that?’ she asked.

He shook his head and shrugged. ‘Not really but… it’s her life and I have to respect her wishes. It’s like… she’s going through the motions, trying to put a brave face on things. Sometimes I get the feeling she’s just holding on for us… for me… for Caitlin.’

‘That’s not good’ she said, letting herself fall against him.

Neal let out a loud mournful sigh. ‘Maybe she’s waiting for us to tell her that we’ll be all right once she’s gone.’

‘Oh, honey I’m sorry. I know this can’t be easy.’

‘I’m going to have to work up the courage to talk to her about it. And we have to prepare Caitlin for what’s coming. It’s going to be really hard on her.’

Leave it to Neal to be considerate of his foster daughter’s feelings when he, himself, was being forced to face the imminent loss of his mother. Lately, as he watched Linda struggle just to breathe, he’d begun to sense that she was fighting to stay around for his sake, for her grandchildren’s sake. At this late stage, all Neal wanted was for her to leave this earth peacefully, serenely and that meant having the grace and the courage to let her go. 

‘Have I thanked you lately?’ he asked out of the blue.

‘Thanked me? For what?’

‘For sneaking off and going to St. Louis to find my mom, and for dragging my sorry ass down there.’

Sara scoffed. ‘You weren’t thanking me at the time’ she reminded him.

That was true enough. Neal had been furious when he'd found out his wife had gone behind his back on a search for his mom. It had taken weeks and plenty of coaxing on Sara’s part for him to finally agree to meet her and that first meeting had been rocky at best. He was grateful for the last few years, getting to know the woman who’d given birth to him after having been separated from her for almost forty years.

‘Well… I’ve learned that I should trust you more’ he said wistfully. ‘I know now that you only wanted what was best for me. And you were right.’

He brought his lips to rest on the top of her head, leaving them there as he inhaled the scent of her shampoo.   
‘Oh God!’ Sara exclaimed as an idea occurred to her. ‘You realize what this means, don’t you? El’s going to want to plan this wedding.’

Neal chuckled. ‘I’m not touching that one with a ten-foot pole. And if you’re smart, neither will you. Hope can decide for herself what she wants.’  
‘You’re right. A wedding…’ she sighed dreamily. ‘Next thing you know, there’ll be babies…’

‘Babies! Babe, what are you talking about? Who said anything about babies.’

‘I don’t know. I think we underestimate just how hard it was for Hope to have to leave Carnegie Mellon. I always get the sense that she’s looking for something to fill that void.’

‘Oh, so not only do you want to plan her wedding, now you want to plan the rest of her life.’

‘Stop it! I’m just telling you what I think.’

‘Honey, Hope has a full life with the gallery, the classes she teaches, her friends, her life with Cam. Why are you in a hurry for her to have kids? She’s young, she’s got her whole life ahead of her.’

He sighed deeply. ‘Time will tell’ he finally conceded.

She looked up at him with a naughty grin. ‘I’m just sayin’… Grandpa.’

Neal moved with lightning speed, flipping Sara onto her back and tickling her mercilessly as she giggled loudly, trying in vain to push him away as he held her down.

‘Who you callin’ Grandpa… Grandma?’ he said with a chuckle of his own.

He looked into her eyes, her gorgeous green eyes shining in the warm glow of the bedside lamp - just as they’d shone in that horrible dream he'd had the previous night. He leaned down to kiss her, feeling the desire rising in him. Although tempted, he wasn’t quite prepared to give in to his urges just yet. Instead, he watched her laugh, feeling his heart fill with joy. 

She had that amazing look in her eyes and Randall Piper was nowhere in sight. 

She was all his. His wife, his lover, his best friend. And he couldn't quite believe his luck. 

‘You’re beautiful’ he whispered.

TBC


	36. Chapter 36

Neal swivelled back and forth in the chair, staring back at himself in the big round mirror. To be fair, Charmaine had tried to warn him.

‘Do you like it?’ the hair stylist asked over his shoulder.

He looked like one of those Lego people, his hair a hard shiny helmet of unyielding dark brown, the colour stark and artificial, making his face look white and pasty.

‘Ummm. I guess’ he said.

What else could he say, she’d done exactly as instructed.

‘You’ll get used to it’ she said, putting the best possible face on the disaster that was staring back at them.

The woman who’d been cutting and styling his hair since they’d first moved to White Plains had been witness to the subtle changes in the man’s wavy tresses over the past twenty odd years. She’d watched as Neal had gone from being a young, busy dad with the most gorgeous head of dark, wavy hair to the father of active teens, his temples gradually greying in response to the passing years and the inevitable stress of having adolescents in the house. 

Around the time Caitlin had come into their lives, Neal had even developed a small bald spot in the back of his head - a reaction, she’d assured him, to the stress in his life. She’d been right of course; the hair had grown back within a few months.

Over time, Neal had learned to trust her with his hair - something the rather vain ex-con valued as much as his prized dimples and confident smile. Now, at the age of sixty, she thought the man she still called Mr. Caffrey looked as sexy and buff as ever, the grey at his temples only adding to the air of sophistication he’d always exuded. 

Until now. 

Staring back at him in the mirror, the woman was now having regrets she hadn't tried harder to dissuade him from the folly of covering up the grey with something called ‘Chestnut Brown’.

‘It’ll grow back’ she attempted in a last ditch effort to reassure him.

It wasn't exactly the effect Neal had been going for. With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, he’d envisioned a rejuvenated new look, and with it an opportunity to impress his wife by taking her out for a nice meal at a fancy restaurant and perhaps facing his insecurities by sweeping her off her feet when they finally made it home. 

Maybe that could still work out. If Sara kept her eyes closed — or if he wore a paper bag over his head.

Charmaine gave one last sweeping glance at the mess she’d created and removed the plastic smock from Neal’s shoulders, standing back and sighing. There wasn't much else she could say or do. 

‘It’s good for about thirty or so washes.’

‘You mean I can wash it out?’ Neal asked, hopeful.

‘No, not exactly but it will fade the more you wash your hair’ she explained.

He nodded and stood, giving her a forced smile.

‘Thanks… I guess’ he said, pulling out his wallet.

She watched him turn away and grab for his coat and hat, adjusting it on his head as he stepped out into the cold February day. Her friend and co-worker Lisa leaned in, whispering in her ear.

‘Now that was scary… like watching a train wreck.’

WCWCWC

At around the same time his dad was coming to terms with the terrible mistake he’d just made, Liam Caffrey was sitting in the waiting room of student services at Syracuse University wondering what the hell he was doing there. The first thing he’d done upon returning from Boston the night before was to call Mike Perry to get an update on how things were going with Todd. 

Mike was pleased to report that Todd’s parents and sister had arrived from Denver and were by his side in hospital. They were still trying to figure out how to best deal with the situation and were exploring options for treatment. According to Mike, Todd had even shown an interest in returning home for a few months so he could get himself sorted out. It was beginning to look like there would be a resolution to this difficult situation and yet Liam was still feeling lost and confused.

He glanced around the waiting room at the faces of students around him. Student services occupied most of the second floor of the main building on campus which also housed the admissions office and financial aid. The offices that made up the student resource centre were tucked away behind a huge reception desk manned by third and fourth year university students as part of their placements in fields such as social work and administrative support. He knew for a fact from his earlier visits that, hidden behind that counter, was a maze of hallways leading to dozens of rooms housing academic counsellors, study group rooms, meeting rooms, even the LGBTQ Resource Centre which was located amongst the other resources available to students. Liam had been there on several occasions with Todd and some of the other LGBTQ advocates — the last time as recently as two weeks ago to discuss an upcoming fundraiser.

Two girls sat together whispering and when Liam looked over, one of them glanced up at him, giving him a brilliant smile and batting her long eyelashes. He was getting used to the adulation on campus. As a member of the university basketball team, there were always groupies hanging around practices and games and those who weren’t in his close, immediate circle of friends would have no idea he preferred jocks straps to bra straps. 

He smiled back politely at the young woman and turned away, checking his phone in order to keep his eyes and hands busy.

‘Liam Caffrey!’ a young woman standing by the reception desk called out. She was in her late twenties to early thirties, a real looker with long dark hair and striking blue eyes. She stood with calm and self-assurance and her warm smile immediately inspired confidence; as a matter of fact, she reminded him of Hope: self-confident yet engaging. 

A few of the students in the waiting room craned their heads to get a better look at him and he heard one of the two girls who’d been whispering say to the other: ‘See, I told you it was him.’ 

Although not exactly rock star material, Liam’s name was making the rounds at Syracuse U; it was often mentioned in ‘The Daily Orange’ which reported on the university basketball team’s exploits. In its latest edition, the student paper had even run a feature on the freshman, exulting his virtues as the saviour of the men’s team after a couple of lean years in the league. As a matter of fact, Liam had been walking around with a ball cap for a couple of weeks, trying his best to remain anonymous.

‘Hi Liam’ the young woman said, extending her hand in greeting. ‘I’m Catherine Keene. Most people call me Cat.’

‘Hi… Cat’ Liam said, smiling back.

‘Follow me.’

Catherine Keene’s office was located towards the back of a long narrow hall. On the wall right outside the door was a name plate that read ‘C. Keene, Counselling’. 

‘Have a seat’ she said pulling out a chair for him as they both entered the tiny space.

Inside the room, was an undersized desk facing the wall, leaving just enough room for a small table and two chairs - certainly more convivial that having to sit and chat with someone who was hiding behind a desk. 

To his relief, he noted there was no couch in sight - and no sign of Sigmund Freud sitting there cross legged with a cigar in one hand and a pad and pencil in the other.

‘Can I get you something to drink? We have a pop machine down the hall.’

‘No… thanks’ Liam said, wishing he could disappear under the table.

Having to live through the last few weeks, the aborted break-up, his and Todd’s brief reunion, the final goodbye and this last, horrible incident… well, it was bad enough. Now, he had to tell a perfect stranger all about it.

There was a copy of the student newspaper on the woman’s desk and Liam’s eyes were drawn to it - his face staring back at him from the front page. She seemed to notice right away and picked it up, pointing to his likeness.

‘It can’t be easy to always be in the spotlight’ she said. ‘I noticed those girls staring at you when I called out your name in the waiting room.’

Liam shrugged; there was little else in life that made him more uncomfortable than to be on display.

‘It’s just… basketball’ he murmured.

‘I get it’ she said with a smile. She set the paper down, turning it over. ‘People here at Syracuse U take their sports pretty seriously. It can’t be easy to always be in the limelight - unless of course, you enjoy that kind of thing. But… I’m guessing from your reaction that’s not the case with you.’

Liam shrugged. ‘I could do without that part of it.’

She had a kind face and he appreciated the fact she wasn’t rushing him. In a different setting, she might be the kind of person he’d enjoy chatting with at a party.

‘I hear the team did well in Boston this weekend’ she continued. 

He knew she was just trying to make him feel at ease and that it was probably a technique she’d learned in Counselling 101. Nevertheless, the gesture was still appreciated.

‘Yeah, there’s a lot of travelling involved in playing on the team.’

‘That can’t be easy. Doesn’t leave much time for school or a social life.’

‘I make do. The professors give us extra time for assignments and we have people who take notes for us if we have to miss a lecture.’

She nodded. ‘Are you able to have a little time for a social life?’

Liam shrugged. ‘We hang out a lot as a team and I have a few friends on campus but mostly I go to class, study and go to practice.’

‘Where do you hail from Liam?’

‘New York City. My folks and sister live there and so do most of my friends. I try to get back every couple of months.’

‘You must miss home. Are you close to your family?’

‘Yeah, really close. My sister and I just had lunch last Friday. She was visiting her fiancé’s family in Watertown and drove up for the day. And my mom and dad… they visit too. They worry about me, I guess.’

He smiled as he spoke and Cat returned the smile. She made a mental note of the fact that the sweet young man sitting across from her had some good, strong supports in place.

‘Well, freshman year is tough, no doubt about it. So much to get used to: living away from home, having to motivate yourself, staying on course with all the distractions.’

‘Anyone special in your life?’

He appreciated the fact that she didn't ask if he had a girlfriend. He’d had to field that question so many times over the years and it made his stomach fill with butterflies whenever it was asked by little old ladies or acquaintances of his parents — always with the best of intentions, of course.

‘That’s sort of why I’m here’ Liam said, looking directly into the woman’s eyes.

He hesitated, unsure where to start. She seemed to pick up on his hesitation. 

‘Take your time. Just start at the beginning.’

‘I’m gay’ he said as a prologue to the tale he was about to tell.

She nodded and smiled, no other reaction.

‘When I got here in September, I didn't know anybody and I met this guy in one of my classes. He was… very out and he started coming on to me. He got me involved with the LGBTQ Resource Centre’ he said, pointing in the direction of the door. ‘And we started dating.’

‘His name is Todd and we dated from about October ’til after Christmas.’

‘What happened after Christmas?’

‘Over the holidays, I went home and I realized I still had feelings for my ex.’

‘This is someone you were with in New York?’

‘Yeah, all through high school. We met when I was thirteen and we were together off and on for almost six years.’

‘Wow! That’s a long time. What’s his name?’

‘Cody.’

‘So what happened with Cody? Why did you two break up?’

‘It was mostly my idea. He stayed in New York to go to Columbia and I didn't think it was fair to string him along… you know, with us being in different cities and all. And then there’s the fact that we’re so young to be committing to one person.’

She nodded, no judgement on her face.

‘When I went back home, I bumped into him and I realized I’m still in love with him and then this other relationship I was having with Todd… it started to feel empty.’

‘Did you talk about all this with Cody?’

‘Yeah, we talked about it but he said as long as I was seeing Todd, we should just keep things as they are… you know, stay apart. When I got back after the holidays, I started to realize my relationship with Todd wasn't really what I needed — or what I wanted. He’s… he’s clingy and he doesn't always respect my personal space.’

‘Having your personal space is important to you’ she said more than asked.

‘Yeah, really important. I don't have a lot of free time and even though I’m here on a basketball scholarship, it’s costing my parents a lot of money for me to live on campus and I… it’s important to me to do well, you know, to make them proud.’

‘So what happened with Todd? Were you able to work things out?’

‘No, I thought it would be best not to string him along so I decided to break up with him.’

‘That’s the second time you’ve used the expression ‘string him along’. You said it when you talked about Cody a minute ago.’

‘Yeah, it’s important for me to be honest. Well, I think so anyway.’ 

‘Were you clear about what you were able and willing to give in your relationships… with Cody and Todd?’

‘I don’t know, I think so. I try to be honest… if I’m in a relationship, I want to be all in.’

‘That’s very commendable Liam. You need to remember though, that everybody is responsible for their own feelings and actions and if you’re being honest and someone is willing to go along for whatever their reasons are, well that’s not your responsibility, it’s theirs.’

‘So, tell me. What happened when you decided to break up with Todd?’

Liam sighed loudly as he recalled the confrontation they’d had in the student common. ‘He didn't take it very well. I tried to explain to him that I needed some space. At first, he thought I was doing it because I wanted to get back with Cody which deep down I guess I do but it was more than that. I was feeling… suffocated, like I couldn't breathe.’

‘That sounds reasonable to me’ Cat said, nodding. ‘People break up all the time for all kinds of reasons.’

‘Well, our break-up lasted like a few hours and when I got back to my dorm room that night, Todd was there waiting for me.’

Liam looked terribly ill at ease and yet something was pushing him to finish the story.

‘We… slept together. Again. I was weak.’

She smiled kindly. ‘You mean you acted like a normal red-blooded gay man.’

He chuckled nervously, beginning to relax. ‘Yeah, well, I wasn't terribly pleased with myself and then I had to do it all over again - I mean, the breaking up not the having sex. Because I knew all along that breaking up was what I really needed to do.’

‘So did you? Break it off again?’

‘Yes, right away. We went out for coffee and I told him to please respect my wishes and give me the space I needed. He was gutted, though. He tried to plead with me but I didn't give in that time.’

‘You were true to yourself.’

‘I guess but… and this is why I’m here. He’s in one of my classes and it was awkward at first so I started sitting at the other end of the hall just so we wouldn't be in each other’s face. Then last week, he didn't show up for class. I’d heard he wasn't coping very well since the break-up but I was staying away, you know, letting time heal things. But last Thursday, when he didn't come to class, I started to get worried. For all his craziness, Todd is really anal about going to class. So I phoned his roommate and I found out he’d… taken some pills.

‘He tried to commit suicide?’

Liam voice got quiet. ‘Yes.’

‘Have you seen him since then?’

‘No. That’s just it. I don’t know what to do. I care about what happens to him but I don’t want to…’

‘String him along?’ she said with a smirk.

‘I guess. I wouldn't want him to think I’m there because I want to get back together with him. Because I don’t.’

‘I understand.’

‘It’s my fault’ he said, his voice choked. He pulled out the note Todd had left for him and he placed it on the table between them. 

‘He left you a note’ she observed, making no move to touch it. ‘How did that make you feel?’

‘The fact that he tried to kill himself of that he left me a note?’

‘Both.’

Liam’s eyes narrowed as if, up until this moment, he hadn’t given much thought to how he felt.

‘I’m not sure, it’s kind of all jumbled up. Guilty, I guess, scared he might try again, angry at him for being so stupid and not telling me what was going on.’

He continued, the emotions pouring out. ‘How come I didn't see it coming? He was always a happy go lucky guy you know, really flamboyant and outgoing. Now I find out he’s bipolar.’

She sighed and nodded. ‘Bipolar disorder is very serious if it’s not treated properly.’

‘I found out he wasn't taking the medication the doctor had prescribed. He never even shared that with me.’

‘You’re disappointed? Angry?’

‘Yeah’ Liam said, growing more agitated. ‘We were dating. He knew all about me, that I’m diabetic, he knew all about my family, what happened with Cody… He didn't tell me anything. Apparently, his parents don't even talk to him, they don't accept that he's gay. He never even told me about that.’

‘And how is that your fault?’

He shrugged. ‘I don’t know. Why didn't he tell me?’

‘I don’t know the answer to that question but you know, Liam, everybody’s responsible for their own actions. You can’t force someone to talk to you, to confide in you. If they want to keep secrets or deceive you, that’s on them, not you.’

Liam swallowed. ‘Could I have some water?’

‘Of course’ she said, getting to her feet. ‘I’ll be just a minute.’

Liam watched her step out of the office and was overwhelmed with the urge to run away.

Far, far away.

WCWCWC

Mozzie didn't often pay a visit to the Raphael but on this day, he’d been meeting a ‘friend’ nearby to discuss a ‘business deal’. It seemed a lot of things in the odd little man’s life required quotation marks — that would never change. It was just after lunch and he knew that it was Neal’s custom to drop by the gallery most afternoons. Maybe he’d get lucky, he thought as he made his way up West 27th in the slushy snow.

He found Peter at his usual spot behind the small desk he occupied in a corner of the main floor. There were a couple of part-time staff he didn't recognize nearby. They eyed him suspiciously as he stepped into the gallery, a scarf thrown casually around his neck for dramatic effect.

‘Mozzie!’ Peter called out, getting to his feet. ‘It’s not often we see you in this part of town.’

‘I had a… meeting’ he said, circumspect.

Peter didn't bother to ask. He never did. It was infinitely better that way. For both of them.

‘Where are Cam and Hope?’

‘They’re still up north until the end of the week visiting Cam’s folks.’

Mozzie nodded. ‘I was hoping to catch Neal’ he said.

‘He’s due in anytime’ Peter said. ‘Come on, I’ll show you some of the new stuff we got in.’

He took Mozzie’s arm, directing him towards the back of the gallery while the part-timers continued to see to the paying customers - which Mozzie definitely was not.

He still got itchy fingers around any type of art, wondering what any given piece would get on the black market. Not that he would ever steal from his best friend…. and yet, he continued the mental calculations as Peter ushered him around the first floor showing off their wares.

‘So, how is Neal?’ Mozzie asked. ‘Does he seem a little off to you lately?’

‘Off? What do you mean off?’ Peter asked.

‘You know, distracted. Not quite himself.’

‘I don’t know…’ Peter said hesitantly. Maybe the news of his impending retirement had affected Neal more than he'd realized. 

‘You don’t know what?’ Neal asked, sneaking up on his two buddies.

‘Neal! There you are, I was just telling Mozzie you’d be dropping by anytime.’

Neal did that head nod, eyebrow raise thing he did when he didn't believe a word someone was saying. ‘Oh yeah?’ 

Mozzie was giving him a strange look, his head cocked to one side. ‘There’s something different about you’ he said, examining him. ‘Something’s off.’

Neal tugged on his hat, pulling it down even further over his ears. ‘What do you mean?’

‘Your hair… it’s looks different’ he exclaimed.

Peter began to study his best friend, nodding. ‘Yeah, what’s up with your hair?’

He reached over in a playful attempt at pulling Neal’s hat off his head.

‘Hey, hey! Hands off the fedora!’ Neal shouted, stepping away. 

‘What’d you do Neal?’ Peter asked with a wide grin. ‘You didn’t… naw, you didn’t, did you?’

‘What? What did he do? Or not do?’ Mozzie asked, feeling at a disadvantage.

‘Oh, he’s been moaning about this Randall Piper guy and how he’s coming on to Sara. Said he was going do see about a dye job.’

‘I have not been moaning….’ Neal moaned.

He turned towards Mozzie to plead his case and in that moment, Peter swooped down and removed the hat, uncovering his head - and his new, improved hair colour.

The two men gasped as they got a look at Neal’s head, looking like he’d just given it a good shine with some black shoe polish.

‘Ewwww’ Peter lamented. ‘What the hell?’

‘Oh Neal…’ Mozzie said. ‘What the hell were you thinking?’

WCWCWC

When Catherine Keene returned to her office, she was relieved to find Liam still sitting there, waiting for her. She hadn't just fallen off the turnip truck and she knew the request for water had been merely a diversion. This was a young man who didn't share his emotions easily and even though he’d made an appointment to see her — and had managed to keep it — that didn't mean he was willing and able to see it through.

‘I’m glad you’re still here’ she said, setting the bottle of water on the table.

‘What — ’ he began feebly. She was smarter than she looked.

‘I thought about bolting but… I guess I’d have to come back eventually.’

She smiled. ‘That’s usually the case when we try to run from our emotions.’

‘My dad… he’s… well he went through a rough time a few years back and he’s a big believer in getting help when you need it.’ 

He looked up at her, opened the bottle of water. ‘He wasn't always like that but it helped him get through… some of the stuff that happened to him. He thought maybe you could help me.’

‘Well, I’d like to help you but ultimately, as I said, everyone does what they want to do and advice - even good, solid advice - can only go so far.’

‘Should I go see him? That’s really what I’m wondering.’

‘Todd?’ she asked as he nodded. ‘What would be your motivation for going to see him?’

‘I want him to know I care about what happens to him. That he was important in my life… even if we can’t have the same kind of relationship we had before.’ 

She nodded and looked down at the note which remained untouched. ‘Does he blame you in his note?’

‘No… not exactly. He said that having me in his life made things easier… better and that when I wasn't there anymore, well, he didn't feel like life was worth living.’

‘That’s a lot to carry around on your shoulders.’

‘I just want to be true to myself. Not give him any false hopes. But he doesn't have that many friends and maybe it would help if I went to the hospital to see him.’

It was quiet for a moment. ‘Or maybe not’ he added.

‘As long as you’re not doing it out of a sense of obligation or because you don't want to feel guilty, I think paying him a visit would be a reasonable thing to do. Are you worried he might try to make you feel guilty?’

‘I don’t know. He might be embarrassed about what happened. I’m not sure. I guess I don’t know him as well as I thought I did.’

‘Is there someone who could act as a go-between. Someone who could find out how Todd would feel about you visiting him?’

‘I suppose. I’ve been in touch with his roommate, he’s seeing him regularly.’

‘Do you feel strong enough to face him?’

‘I think so. I just don’t know what I’d say. How can I help him?’

‘Well, for one thing, you want to stay calm, not preach or lecture. I’m sure there’s nothing you can say that he hasn't already thought about himself. You can’t pretend it didn't happen, just tell him what you told me, that you care about what happens to him and that you’re sorry he’s in so much pain. That you’re glad he’s still here. If he opens up about how he feels, you can listen, without judgement, see what’s on his mind. Some people who try to kill themselves are worried about who’s going to find out about it. You could reassure him that you’ll be discreet, not share what he says to you with other people he’s not comfortable with knowing.’

‘What if he comes right out and asks me to get back together with him. Or threatens to do something if I don’t?’

‘Well, that’s when things can get tricky. Only Todd can decide what he’s going to say and do. He can’t make you say or do anything you don't want to so I would say that honesty is the best policy. If you see the conversation is headed in that direction, you’re going to have to remind him why you broke up with him in the first place, tell him nothing has changed in that regard but that you hope he’ll be able to work through this, to take advantage of all the help and support that’s available to him. If you feel up to it, you could ask him how you can help - short of getting back together with him, that is.’

‘What if I decide to stay away?’

‘That’s your decision to make Liam. And, considering the circumstances, that would be a reasonable option as well. Only you know what’s best for him. And for you. But if you’re respectful of him and of yourself, it could do him good to know you still care what happens to him. It might help him recover if he knows he has people in his corner.’ 

Liam nodded.

‘What you don't want to do is leave him with the impression that you’re ready to go back to him or that you’re scared that, if you don’t, he might try to harm himself again. That…’ Cat said, reaching out and laying a hand on Liam’s arm. ‘… is entirely up to Todd. He’s the only one responsible for his actions.’

The medical alert bracelet Liam always wore jiggled on his arm and Catherine Keene, looked into his eyes.

‘How long since your diagnosis?’ she asked.

‘I was eleven so… about eight years. It’s pretty well under control.’

‘Well, I don't have to tell you what stress does to your sugar levels. Is it really under control?’

‘More or less. I haven't felt much like eating lately.’

‘Well, if there’s one piece of advice I can give you, it’s this. Take care of yourself. Make sure you have people to talk to about how you’re feeling. Even though it’s not happening to you, it’s affecting you all the same. Do you feel like you have those supports in your life?’

‘Yeah, yeah. My roomie is great. And my best friend, well he’s in New York but he’s just a phone call away. My sister’s been amazing and my folks… my dad was ready to jump in the car and come down for a few days.’

‘Why didn't you let him?’

‘Because it’s silly. He’s… busy with work and stuff and…’

She remained silent, her lips pursed in a way he’d seen his mom look at him a gazillion times over the years when she thought he was bullshitting. 

‘Maybe I’ll give him a call.’

TBC


	37. Chapter 37

‘So, what does he look like?’ Emily asked.

Sara tugged at her skirt and repositioned herself on the white leather chair. ‘What do you mean, what does he look like? He’s a client, that’s all.’

‘Right!’ Emily replied, deadpan. ‘That’s why you’ve been fawning over him for the past two weeks. Because he’s just a client.’

Sara let out a disgruntled moan. ‘Oh, for heaven’s sake, Em. You’re so… childish and immature. I’m a fifty-five-year-old professional woman who’s happily married. I don’t fawn over other men.’

‘What? You don’t think Neal notices beautiful women when they walk by? You're only human.’

Sara stood and looked through the glass wall separating her office from her assistant’s workspace, making sure no one could see what she was doing.  
‘Are you near your laptop?’ she whispered as if afraid to be overheard.

‘Yeah…’

‘Google him and go to ‘Images’’

‘P-Y-P-E-R?’

‘No, I. P-I-P-E-R’

She could hear fingers dancing across a keyboard. ‘Oooooh!’ Emily cried out. ‘Hellooooo Mr. Piper! Well, if you don't want him sis, you can send him my way. I would definitely not kick this guy’s ass out of bed for eating crackers.’

‘Emily!’ Sara said, pretending to sound outraged.

‘What? What’s not to like? He’s stinking rich and gorgeous to boot.’

Sara remained silent for a moment, her eyes staring at the screen. Her sister had a point, the guy was mighty fine and he was stinking rich. 

‘So, is he going to be there or did he leave you a key to his place?’

‘No, he’ll be there. We’re going to work together to get through as much stuff as possible. It might take a couple of days and then we have to do the same at his vacation place in the Hamptons.’

‘Have you decided if you’re coming to Chicago to inventory his townhouse in Forest Glen?’

‘I don't know… I’m trying to get out of it, maybe I could send Lydia in my place.’

‘Why? I’ve never known you to wimp out when it comes to your job.’

‘Neal’s been pretty good about watching from the sidelines while I work with my ex. I don’t want to push my luck.’

‘Awww, come on Sara. Neal gets it, it’s your job. Just tell him I’ll act as chaperone’ Emily giggled. ‘You could stay at my place. There’s this new Indian restaurant over on Argyle Street I’ve been dying to try.’ 

Sara’s cell phone rang and she glanced at the screen. Neal. 

‘Look sis, I’ve got to get back to work and I’ve got Neal calling on my cell.’

‘Oh, you mean your conscience is calling’ Emily chuckled.

‘Very funny! Goodbye, I’ll talk to you later.’

She put down the phone and grabbed for her cell in one swift motion.

‘Hi honey!’ she chirped, her eyes still glued to the computer screen displaying a photograph of Randy Piper.

‘Hey, are you at his place yet?’

‘What? Neal, are you checking up on me?’

‘No! I’m not checking up on you’ he said, his tone indignant. ‘I just… well, I’m dropping Mozzie off not too far from your office. I thought I could swing by and pick you up, take you over to his place.’

‘You mean you want to drop me off so you can snoop around Randall’s place and get a look at his loot.’

Neal glanced at Mozzie who was sitting next to him in the car, pretending not to eavesdrop on the conversation between the man and his wife. 

‘Of course not! I’m just… trying to do something nice for my wife. Jeesh!’

He’d debated whether or not to offer to drive her over to the Upper East Side considering the state of his coiffure. Once he dropped Mozzie off at his next destination, he would be just a few blocks away from Sterling Bosch; it was the perfect excuse to go over and check out the multi-millionaire’s digs and bountiful treasure. Maybe if he kept his hat firmly in place, she wouldn't even notice his hair and he could put off the inevitable ribbing he was definitely in for once she got a good look at the mess he’d made.

‘Well, thank you honey. That’s really sweet of you’ she said with forced patience. ‘But it’s just a short cab ride from here and Randy’s not expecting me for another hour.’

Neal frowned. ‘What do you mean, Randy’s not expecting you? Didn't you say he was going to be out on the west coast all week on business.’

‘Yeah, but he called and said his meetings were cancelled. He’s going to give me a hand with the inventory. That way, it’ll go a lot faster.’

Neal pouted and pulled his hat down over his ears. ‘Well, what about dinner? I was going to make pasta.’

Mozzie rolled his eyes; domesticity was really not his thing.

‘Honey, I doubt I’ll be home until later. Randy and I will probably just grab a quick bite while we work. Don’t wait up, okay? I want to try to make a start so we can move on to his place in the Hamptons by the end of the week.’ 

Neal glanced at himself in the rearview mirror, his eyes narrowing, deep lines forming on his forehead. Anything he might say at this point would likely be interpreted as sour grapes or worse yet, petty jealousy. He bit his tongue.

‘Have you heard from Liam yet?’ Sara asked.

At least she remembered she had kids. ‘No’ Neal replied dryly. ‘Not yet. I’ll give him a call when I hang up.’

‘Text me and let me know how he's doing. Don’t call, okay. I don't want to be taking personal calls when I’m supposed to be concentrating on Randy… I mean Randy’s stuff… I mean Randy’s art and stuff.’ 

She grew flustered; she could well imagine Neal rolling his eyes on the other end of the line. 

‘Just… just text me and let me know how Liam made out with the counsellor. Look, I’ve got to go. I’ve got a few things to get done before I head out.’

Neal felt like he’d been kicked in the shin. ‘Okay… well, I love you. See you later.’

‘Later honey’ she said before hanging up.

‘Well, I see little Miss Repo’s gone and caught herself a big white whale.’

Neal shot him a dirty look. ‘Not helping Moz!’

‘You know, I don’t know what you’re worried about. Just do a little recon on him, check him out.’

‘I did, Moz, I did check him out and all that did was get me in the doghouse with Sara.’

Mozzie made a soft whimpering noise like a scared little puppy. He put his hands up as if they were paws and batted his eyes at Neal playfully. 

‘Stop it! Look, Sara doesn't want me snooping around… so I’m going to respect her wishes.’

Mozzie almost bought it. He knew this whole situation with Randall Piper was driving Neal crazy and he'd bet his safe house in Pennsylvania (again) that the bad hair dye job was related to Sara’s recent fixation on her new client. Neal’s natural curiosity when it came to shiny objects of any kind was a matter of record but beyond that, he was showing uncharacteristic signs of being a jealous husband — a most unbecoming look for the ex-con. 

‘Whatever’ Mozzie said, shrugging.

It was time to take matters into his own hands. If Neal wasn't going to check this guy out, he would have to step up to the plate and do it for him. He patted his satchel where he’d packed his camera and his binoculars as well as a couple of very clever disguises. Neal didn't need to know what he was up to — at least not yet. After all, if there was one thing Mozzie had learned about hanging around those FBI types all those years, it was the concept of plausible deniability.

He glanced over at Neal watching his bottom lip protrude in a decisive pout. If Mozzie’d had a handlebar moustache, he’d be twirling the ends and laughing diabolically right about now.

Mwahahahaha.

WCWCWC

It was a short cab ride to the Upper East Side and Sara used the time productively, giving in to her irrepressible inquisitiveness - which in this case, bordered on intrusiveness. She pulled out her phone and googled the current value of the ground floor apartment occupied by Randall Piper over on 94th Street. It was easy enough to find; the latest real estate transaction for this property was in the public domain and dated back four years. Her eyes grew in surprise at what appeared on her screen; Randy had forked over $27,900,000 to buy the place - it was anybody’s guess what it was worth today. 

In contrast, their three bedroom home in the quiet neighbourhood of Prospect Park in White Plains had recently been evaluated at $650,000 — now that they’d added a fourth bedroom and a third bathroom up on the third floor. She recalled how they’d searched high and low to find just the right house, something that would meet their long list of criteria: close to the trains, quiet neighbourhood, big back yard for Hope to play in, nice big kitchen for Neal to play in and with a mortgage they could afford on one income. Neal had just finished serving his sentence and he was still trying to figure out what he wanted to do with the rest of his life. And besides, child care was expensive. It had made sense for him to continue to work the odd case with Peter and take on some short term contracts so he could stay home with Hope until she started school. 

Prior to saying I do, Neal had divested himself of most of his… assets, a manifestation of his eagerness to turn over a new leaf. He’d given a lot of stuff to Mozzie and he’d turned over some items to Sterling Bosch to be returned to their rightful owners. He’d been surprised to find how good it felt to let go of that part of his past and to start fresh, joining forces with Sara to plan their financial future together. Over the years, they had scrimped and saved for years for the kids’ college education and to make Neal’s dream of owning a gallery a reality. Of course, these days, with both the Raphael and the school of art in the black, they were much better off than they’d ever been but their lives were still a far cry from the one lived by the obscenely rich and childless Randall Piper. 

Sara sighed and looked out at the surrounding homes, recalling her bachelor days living in a high end brownstone in Park Slope - a time in her life when she could afford to spend as much as she wanted on expensive shoes, lavish meals out and the finest scotch. 

She recalled the week she’d spent at Neal’s place after her bank account had been hacked into. Their little foray into the life of the rich and famous had been more fun than she could have possibly imagined. It had been her first glimpse at what it would be like to share her life with Neal Caffrey and she’d had to admit she hadn't hated it. With one hundred million dollars at their disposal, she and Neal had made the most extravagant purchases one could imagine, all in the hopes of drawing out the thief who had hacked into the bank’s computer system. 

At the time, she’d begun to wonder if Neal wasn’t somehow involved in the theft of Adler’s treasure and she’d suspected he was keeping something from her. Her suspicions had been further heightened when, one night, as he’d strummed mindlessly on a $800,000 Les Paul, Neal had confessed to just how much he was enjoying having her around and he’d floated the idea of continuing to live life large, beyond their means. 

‘What if I told you we could keep living like this?’ he’d asked her, testing the waters.

She recalled her response, something about not crossing any line she couldn't come back from. Still today, she couldn't help but wonder what their lives might have been like if she hadn't reacted with such rectitude to his question. What if she’d let herself get swept up into Neal’s unrealistic fantasies of a life of unlimited wealth? Would they be living in the lap of luxury in some faraway land? Would reality have eventually caught up with them? Would Neal be serving time in a federal penitentiary? What about her? Would she also be in prison, an accessory to his crimes? 

One thing was for sure, the kids would likely never have been born. Their life, even in a best case scenario, would have been spent on the run, always looking over their shoulder, living off their ill-gotten gains but never really free from their past. It would have been an empty existence, devoid of any real meaning. 

But, that night, in response to his question, she’d drawn a line in the sand and she’d often wondered what choices Neal might have eventually made if it hadn't been for Hope’s unexpected arrival. Even though she knew he had no regrets about the path he’d chosen, she could certainly understand that even years later, being confronted to someone like Randall Piper would still be an irritant for a man like Neal Caffrey. 

Some nights, under the cover of darkness, he’d ask her if she had any regrets about what she’d answered that night all those years ago at June’s kitchen table. On occasion, he would grow nostalgic about the life they could have had, all the things he could have given her, the things he wanted her to have. 

Sara always replied the same way: she had no regrets.

More recently, when the opportunity had arisen to vastly improve their financial situation, his reaction had been surprising, yet in some ways, perfectly predictable. Following June’s passing, Neal had inherited a large sum of money and he and Sara had discussed the possibility of getting a bigger place, perhaps replacing their cars, taking that trip to Europe they’d always dreamed of taking. But in the end, they had agreed that the inheritance should be used for something that was a fitting testimony to his benefactor’s memory and hence, the June Ellington School of Art had been born.

‘This is it, lady’ the cab driver called out, pulling Sara out of her reverie. She glanced out the car window at the opulent property before her. 

It was a nice place to visit. But home, as modest as it was, was where her heart was. 

WCWCWC

Mozzie had spent the last hour casing the place, getting the best possible sight lines into the ground floor property. He’d managed to obtain a copy of the floor plan from someone who owed him a favour down at city hall and he'd taken out his high end binoculars to assist him on his mission. As silly as it was, Neal was worried about Sara’s association with this man and Mozzie reasoned that the more information he could provide, the better to put his best friend’s mind at ease. 

He cursed the fact that he hadn't had time to plant some sort of listening device inside the apartment - maybe that opportunity would present itself at some point - but for the time being his eyes were going to have to bear witness to what this guy was up to. 

If anything. 

Mozzie had been watching for about twenty minutes when he spotted a cab drive up and stop directly in front of the short stairway leading up to the high end apartment. Through his binoculars, he watched as Sara stepped out of the taxi, smoothed out her coat and began the short climb up the steps to the ornate front door. When it opened, he got a glimpse inside at the ostentatious front hall where a manservant stood, welcoming the new arrival. He observed the man himself, Randall Piper, sweeping past the windows of the dining room and living space, making his way to the front door where he greeted Sara with a warm hug. 

Mozzie heard Sara’s familiar voice resonating from across the street as she greeted her client, followed by a warm laugh he recognized as her nervous titter. The door closed and Mozzie moved to the second station he’d set up, a park bench with a view into the study and living space. He was grateful for the mild February day, no precipitation in sight. It was still early afternoon and until nightfall, the daylight would allow him to spy on the goings on without difficulty. The question was, was Piper one of those compulsive curtain drawers - those people who immediately drew their blinds or curtains as soon as the sun went down. 

Time would tell.

He’d come equipped with his camera, several lenses and a full course meal he was planning on having at the small coffee shop a few doors down. Neal would probably act all outraged and self-righteous when he found out about Mozzie’s little side trip, but deep down, he’d be milking his partner in crime for every single detail.

Mozzie returned his attention towards the window to the study, where the man had led Sara. There was some small talk between the two of them while Sara opened her briefcase and pulled out some documents. Mozzie watched as Piper motioned to an armchair nearby, inviting her to take a seat. Their body language, which was all he had to go on for the moment, seemed appropriate to the situation. Sara sat with her long legs crossed, her skirt pulled down to her knees, leaning forward as she spoke and Piper sat across from her in an identical armchair, his right ankle resting on his left knee.

Mozzie observed as Jeeves reappeared, right on cue, carrying a tray of what looked like cookies or scones - hard to tell from this angle as well as a teapot Mozzie immediately recognized as a Tiffany sterling silver tea service - which retailed for somewhere upwards of $20,000. He remembered getting half that for one he’d located in the home of the Earl of Shannon in Ireland. He’d kindly taken it off the man’s hands after he’d managed to get himself temporarily hired onto the household staff. Temporarily as in he'd taken off for parts unknown the minute he’d gotten his greedy little hands on a couple of choice items.

Mozzie squinted to get a better look at the occupants of the house and cursed the fact he didn't have ears on the situation. That would have given him a lot more information to relay to Neal. He began to plot a way in which he could make that happen.

After all, Mozzie was nothing if not creative. 

WCWCWC

‘We should really get started’ Sara said as she finished up her second cup of tea. ‘We’ve got lots to get through.’

She couldn't believe she’d already been there close to an hour and all they’d done was chat, reminiscing about the old days, talking about Randall’s latest acquisitions, discussing the new play that was starting next week with that guy who played a computer nerd on that tv show. 

‘I suppose we should’ he said, getting to his feet. ‘What do you say we start with the entryway and… maybe this room?’

‘Sounds good. That would definitely be a good start’ she replied, glancing around at the many pieces of art surrounding her.

There were paintings, sculptures, vases, antique furniture to say nothing of the wine collection that was scattered across his three properties, the man’s extensive jewelry collection and the yacht he had moored at the North Cove Marina. Ascertaining the value of his belongings would dictate his insurance premiums and she wanted to make certain everything was assessed properly, reflecting the items’ true value. She couldn't count the times owners moaned because they hadn't properly had their assets evaluated; she wasn't about to let that happen to their rock star client.

‘You don't usually do this kind of work do you?’ 

Sara chuckled. ‘Usually, one of my staff will do the inventory and I’ll just sign off on it.’

He smiled at her, that smile that made him look decades younger. 

‘Lucky me!’ he said.  
WCWCWC

The television droned on as Neal snored loudly on the couch. With the prospect of dinner on his own, he’d stopped off on the way home to pick up a sub, eating in front of the tube with only Raffie for company. He’d barely finished eating when, while channel surfing, his hand had fallen away and his head had fallen back against the couch, fatigue winning out after a long day. 

His day had started at the school of art in the Bronx where he’d chaired the weekly staff meeting, complete with a lively discussion about the upcoming art exhibit. He’d followed that up with a budget meeting with his finance guy and a quick one on one with one of his teachers, Janelle O’Neill, in order to discuss the worrisome behaviour of one of the students in her class.

At around ten thirty, he’d headed back to White Plains for his haircut appointment, making the impulsive and ill-advised decision to give in to his insecurities - a decision that would haunt him for the next six weeks or so. He'd moved on to Manhattan and a quick check of things at the gallery where he’d discussed a new exhibit with Peter before taking off and dropping Mozzie off on his way to New Rochelle to have dinner with his mom. In between all that running around, he’d fielded a call from Peter about an order that had come in unexpectedly, he’d had a brief chat with Cameron to discuss plans for the upcoming week and he’d spoken twice with Liam following his visit to the counsellor’s office.

That last conversation had stayed with him the rest of the day as he evaluated the merits of driving up to Syracuse for a few days. He’d been quick to reiterate his offer and, to his surprise, this time Liam hadn't flat out turned him down - although he hadn't accepted either. They’d agreed to check in with each other in the morning after a good night’s sleep; Neal wanted to run it by Sara before making any definite plans.

The front door opened and Raffie got up off his master’s feet and ran to welcome the new arrival, the movement waking Neal from his catnap.

‘Sara?’ he called out, sitting up.

‘No, it’s me’ came Caitlin’s voice from the front hall.

He ran his hand through his hair and took stock of the situation: it was ten thirty and he hadn't heard from his wife since dinner time when she’d texted him about Liam. Not that he was worried, exactly. Sara was a big girl and she could certainly take care of herself. But he hated to hit the sack before she got home and he got to his feet to greet his foster daughter.

‘Oh my God! What happened to you?’ Caitlin asked as she turned the corner.

For a minute there, he wondered what she was talking about. He touched his head absentmindedly. ‘Just… just a little experiment’ he mumbled.

‘Can it be undone?’ she asked.

He glared at her. ‘Believe me, I didn't plan for it to look like this.’

She let her eyes grow exaggeratedly. ‘Where’s Sara?’ she asked, looking around.

‘She’s… working late. Did you eat?’ he asked, making his way to the kitchen and the fridge.

‘Yeah, I had a sandwich at work. I’m wiped. I’m going to head up to bed.’

Neal nodded and Caitlin turned to look at him once more. ‘You know it’ll wash out eventually.’

‘So I hear’ he grumbled.

‘Good night’ he called out after her, watching as Raffie got up off the couch and followed her up the stairs.

He wasn't up to facing any more comments about his hair - at least not tonight. Maybe he should just go up to bed and wait for Sara - with the lights out to avoid any further commentary.

His last brilliant idea as he climbed wearily up the stairs was to have a shower - or maybe two - to try to get his beloved salt and pepper locks back ASAP.

WCWCWC

Sara let herself fall onto a gorgeous Louis XIV settee with Beauvais tapestry. The sheet of paper she held in her hand had grown wilted as she marked things off, one at a time, her chicken scratches all over it. The task at hand might have taken an hour or two in any run of the mill home but in this case, where everywhere you looked was another treasure, it would take considerably longer.

‘Oh my God’ she said with a loud sigh. ‘I can’t believe it’s already past ten o’clock.’

Randall fell at her feet, back braced against the settee. ‘I really need to stop buying new stuff’ he said with a laugh.

Sara slipped off her shoes and with her legs splayed akimbo, she let her head fall back on the back of the couch.

‘Well, we’ve got most of the downstairs done’ she declared, sitting up and pulling her skirt down to cover her knees.

‘How about a nightcap?’ Randall asked, getting to his feet and heading over to the bar in the corner of the room.

‘I really need to be getting home’ Sara argued without much conviction.

‘Come on, one drink. My driver will take you home.’

‘All the way out to White Plains?’ she asked with a chuckle.

‘Sure, what’s the point of having a car and a driver if you don’t make use of them? Come on… one drink. I’ve got the good stuff’ he said, lifting a bottle of twenty-five year scotch for her to see.

She looked at the bottle of Bowmore and faltered. She’d seen it many times in the Vintages section of the liquor store but it had always been above their means. 

‘All right, one quick drink’ she said, giving in. ‘We have to get started early in the morning. We still have all your jewelry to do and at the rate we’re going I’m not sure we’ll make it to your other properties before next week.’ 

‘You know there are plenty of guest rooms in this house’ he reminded her. ‘If you wanted to sleep over, we could set you up, no problem.’

Sara laughed nervously. ‘That’s really kind of you but… no thanks. Neal will be waiting up for me.’

‘He seems like a pretty easygoing guy. What’s his story?’ the man asked as he poured them each a couple of inches of the rich amber liquid.

‘Neal? Yeah, he’s pretty easygoing’ she replied, her mind returning to her husband.

‘How long have you two been married?’

‘It’ll be twenty-four years in June’ she replied with a wistful smile.

He let out a whistle. ‘Wow! I never made it past four.’

‘Marriage is a lot of work but… it’s worth it. We have two wonderful kids and a terrific foster daughter. Our daughter Hope is getting married in a couple of months.’

‘Married? How old is she?’

‘She’s turning twenty-four in March.’

Randall grimaced as he did some mental math. ‘Twenty-four…’ he repeated before breaking into a grin. ‘So does that mean it was a shotgun wedding?’

Sara took the glass from his hand and sat up, taking a sip. ‘Not exactly, no. But Hope was three months old when we got married.’

She felt the warm liquid coat her insides and she let out an audible sigh.

‘I hear your husband owns an art gallery. How did that happen?’

‘Neal’s always been really knowledgeable about art. But more than that, he’s a real art lover. He’s an artist himself, an incredibly talented one. As a matter of fact, he used to consult on white collar crimes for the FBI.’

‘The FBI?’ he said with a chuckle. ‘I thought the only consultants the FBI had were criminal informants.’

Sara’s smile faded a little and she quickly pasted on another one. There were things she was not prepared to discuss with an ex and probably never would. 

‘He’s self-taught and he’s turned the gallery into a success story in just a few short years. When a… relative of ours passed away, we decided to take the inheritance money and invest in a school of art for underprivileged kids in the Bronx.’

‘Oh, he’s a do-gooder, huh?’ he said with a smirk.

If you only knew, Sara thought. It hadn't always been that way.

‘He’s an amazing guy and a terrific dad’ she said, her mind turning to thoughts of Neal, back home waiting for her. 

She downed her drink, letting out a sigh and grabbing for her shoes. ‘That was amazing’ she said. ‘Now, if your offer’s still open, I’ll take you up on that drive home.’

WCWCWC

Neal was lying in bed, plotting a special Valentine’s Day outing for him and his wife when he heard a car door slam in the distance. He sprang out of bed and ran across the hall into Liam’s room so he could look out at the front of the house where he saw a limo idling by the curb. A man wearing a cap stepped out and walked around to the passenger’s side, where he opened the car door for his passenger: Sara, carrying a briefcase in her hand. 

He ran back to their bedroom, leaving the lights out; he was in no mood to have to explain his visit to Hair Alive that morning - at least not yet. Within seconds, he heard the front door open, some soft whimpering, compliments of Raffie and the sound of Sara’s footsteps coming up the stairs.

‘Neal?’ she called out softly as she stepped into the darkened room.

He pretended to sleep; that way she wouldn't turn on the lights. He listened to the soft rustling as Sara stepped out of her clothes and he watched with one eye open as she set her skirt and blouse on the chair by the bed, grabbing for a pair of yoga pants and a t-shirt and slipping into bed next to him.

‘Neal? Honey? You awake?’

‘Huh?’ Neal muttered, pretending to wake up. ‘What time is it?’ he groaned.

‘Just past midnight. You’re in bed early’ she commented, reaching out for him.

She ran her hand up his cheek and into his hair. ‘How come your hair’s wet.’

‘I… I took a shower’ he said, settling in behind her and spooning her. ‘You smell like… what is that anyway?’

Sara took a moment to respond. ‘I… I had a quick nightcap before Randy’s driver brought me home.’

‘Oh… a nightcap’ Neal said, his body tensing. Of course, the guy would offer her a nightcap and have a limo and a driver.

Sara reached for his arm and pulled it in tighter around her waist, pressing her body back into his. 

‘It’s good to be home’ she murmured.

Neal relaxed.

TBC


	38. Chapter 38

Sara peeked over Neal’s shoulder, both of them facing the bathroom mirror. 

‘You know it’s really not that bad’ she said, squeezing his arm.

He stared back at her reflection, giving her a deathly stare, no words necessary. To her credit, she’d tried to make light of his little mishap and she’d managed to refrain from teasing him, choosing instead to offer a few choice words of encouragement. 

He turned to face her, eager to change the subject.

He let the outside of his hand slide down the entire length of her cheek then caressed her chin. ‘You’re sure you don’t mind me driving up to Syracuse for a few days.’

‘Of course not, it sounds like Liam could really use the support. I’m just sorry I can’t get away right now.’

Neal let out a long, audible sigh. He didn't need any reminding that Sara was in the middle of a very delicate operation: securing the biggest client Sterling Bosch had ever snagged. The fact the man was obscenely rich and just happened to be an ex-boyfriend only seemed to complicate matters — at least as far as he was concerned.

‘And besides’ Sara added, ‘there’s not much happening around here.’

‘Well, Hope and Cam are back from their trip today so things should get back to normal at the gallery. And my mom seems stable…’ Neal agreed although he seemed to be holding something back.

‘Don’t worry about your mom. I can pop by and check on her at lunchtime if Caitlin can’t make it. Besides, I wouldn't be seeing much of you anyway… at least not until I finish itemizing all of Randy’s stuff’ she said, her voice tentative. 

Neal’s loving smile morphed into a mental eye roll but he managed to kept grinning on the outside. His arms reached out for her, settling around her waist and pulling her hips tightly against his.

‘And don't forget our big date night on Saturday. I’m taking you out for a very special Valentine’s Day dinner.’

‘I’m counting on it’ she whispered, placing a soft, lingering kiss on his lips. 

‘So, where are you taking me Caffrey?’ she cooed once they’d pulled apart. 

He touched the tip of her nose playfully. ‘Never mind where I’m taking you. Just pick out something really nice to wear and be ready to go.’

She pulled out of his embrace and turned her attention to checking out the bags under her eyes in the stark morning light. It had been a short night and she had another long day ahead of her.

‘So what time are you leaving?’ she asked as she poked at the face staring back at her in the mirror.

‘Probably by noon. I just want to make some of those carrot muffins Liam likes so much.’

She looked away from her reflection for a moment. ‘Oh, honey, he’s off those, remember? He said he overdosed on them at Christmas.’

‘Oh yeah, that’s right. I forgot. Oatmeal raisin then, or maybe chocolate chip. Oh, and maybe a blueberry crumble… do we have any blueberries left?’

Sara returned to examining herself in the mirror, not terribly impressed with the person staring back at her. 

‘You’ll have to check honey, I can’t remember’ she mumbled as she poked and prodded.

Neal leaned up against the bathroom counter, eager to get her attention. ‘So… what’s Piper’s place like?’ he asked, the question he’d been dying to ask ever since she’d gotten home the night before.

‘Oh, you know, the usual twenty-seven million dollar crib’ she said with an eyebrow wag. She waved her hand dismissively in the air as if she worked in that kind of environment every day.

‘Really? Twenty-seven million, huh? Any good loot inside?’

She turned to face him. ‘It’s all good loot Neal, embarrassingly so. You should see this place. Even his toilet bowl brush is diamond encrusted.’

He chuckled but she could sense he wasn’t really all that amused. Vanity and over the top displays of ostentatiousness usually worked one of two ways where Neal was concerned: either his eyes glassed over and he began to salivate or he pretended to be annoyed that people would choose to live that way. In this case, considering the circumstances, she could sense he was swaying towards the latter.

‘It’s totally over the top’ she added, ‘every single room in that house is like a museum.’

Neal nodded, his mouth tight as he watched Sara head back to their bedroom to finish getting ready for work.

He returned to examining himself in the mirror while he pondered what kind of treasures might be in that twenty-seven million dollar home on the Upper East Side. 

‘Yeah, right’ he mumbled under his breath. ‘Over the top.’

He was debating if he should bother shaving when his phone vibrated on the counter next to the sink.

He stared down at the text message. From Mozzie. 

‘Stopping by your place for coffee’ it read. ‘Be there.’ 

WCWCWC

The whole family had assembled to wish Cam and Hope a safe trip home. It had only been a week since they’d arrived but, in some ways, it seemed like they’d been there forever. The quiet surroundings of the pristine land and the clean, fresh air had been the perfect counterpoint to their hectic lives back in New York. Now that they’d accomplished what they’d come to do, it was time to get back and start planning their wedding and get back to the harsh realities of their busy lives.

Fred stood in the doorway, holding Hope’s suitcase and waiting while the couple said their goodbyes.

Lucy’s arms were wrapped around Hope’s waist, her head against her chest.

‘I don’t want you to go’ she moaned.

‘Well, we’ll see you at the wedding in May’ Hope reminded her. ‘And if your mom says it’s okay, maybe you could come for a visit this summer.’

Lucy looked over at her mom, eyes pleading.

‘Me too!’ called out Rhonda. ‘Maybe we can go to a Broadway show.’

‘We’ll see, munchkin’ Cam replied, ruffling her hair.

He turned to face his mom, noticing tears in her eyes. ‘Awww, Ma, don’t cry. Please. You’ll make me cry.’

Bonnie Armstrong hugged her son then turned her attention to Hope. ‘You tell your mom to call me and we’ll arrange for me to come to New York and help with the wedding planning.’

Hope smiled broadly, thoughts of her upcoming wedding dancing in her head. ‘Will do, Mrs. Armstrong. And thanks for everything. I had an amazing time’ she said, turning to address everyone. ‘With all of you.’

Fred Armstrong cleared his throat. ‘That train’s gonna leave the station whether you young ‘uns are on it or not’ he reminded them. 

There were hugs all around and finally, the door opened, letting in a rush of cold winter air. 

The young lovers followed Fred out to the car and back to their lives.

WCWCWC

Neal shampooed his hair vigorously for a third time, feeling the warm water wash off his body and slide down the drain. He’d only had the bad dye job for a couple of days and he'd already washed his hair a dozen times.

‘I’m gonna wash that grey right out of my hair’ he sang, recalling the ditty from the old commercial for Clairol. Only in this case, he was trying to wash the grey back into his hair.

His mind wandered as he thought ahead to the next few days. It seemed it was never the right time to go out of town. Things were bustling at the art school what with the big exhibit coming up. Luckily, he could always count on Cindy to keep the place running while he was away; they would just have to muddle through without him for a few days, that’s all. 

At least the gallery was covered — thanks to Peter. Besides, Cam and Hope would be back at work the next day and between the three of them, they had all the angles covered. Neal had been looking forward to catching up with his baby girl following her trip upstate but with his unplanned visit to Syracuse, their little reunion would just have to wait until the weekend when he finally made it back home.

He thought of his mom; her condition was stable, although she vacillated between good and not so good days. At this late stage, it was a risk to leave her side for any length of time but there were no indications that she was in any imminent danger.  
And finally, there was Sara who was busy traipsing around town with an arrogant multimillionaire. He shook his head in order to refocus; the whole thing was more irksome than worrisome - like a fly buzzing around the room that you just couldn't get rid of. He pushed the thought away; Sara was his loving and faithful partner, the woman who had stood by him through thick and thin. There was no reason for him to be jealous — this was just him feeling insecure about having to deal with the pesky side effects from his meds.

Despite all the good reasons for staying home, there had been little doubt as to the necessity for this road trip after he’d hear Liam’s uncharacteristically shaky voice on the phone the night before. Even though Liam had poo-pooed the idea of his dad coming all the way to Syracuse just to hold his hand, Neal could hear the angst in his son’s voice followed by the relief when he’d finally convinced him he was glad to do it. Sara was more than capable of keeping things going on the home front; their son needed him and that’s where he wanted to be. 

Luckily, they were calling for decent weather and it was a relatively short drive; he could be back by the weekend for his big night out with Sara. If need be, he could even bring Liam home for the weekend and put him on the train back to Syracuse late Sunday.

Neal grabbed for a towel and began to review things for their big date night: the restaurant was booked, he’d ordered a big bunch of orchids to be delivered that afternoon and he’d made sure that blue shirt of his that Sara was particularly fond of was clean and pressed for the occasion.

All that was left was for him to work on his… bedroom skills. Some time alone in a hotel room was just what he needed to test the wares and make sure his plumbing was in working condition for the big night. It was going on eight weeks since he'd last successfully made love to his wife and the whole situation was bordering on the ridiculous. Even he could see that the problem was all between his ears and that he needed to get out of his own way and get on with the show. 

He got dressed, comfortable wear for the drive upstate, and headed down to the kitchen to throw a few things together for a care package for Liam. He’d just turned the corner into the kitchen when he practically jumped out of his skin as he spotted someone sitting there.

‘What the hell… Moz, how many times have I told you, don't do that! You scared the living crap out of me.’

Mozzie sat there with his feet propped up on a chair, quietly sipping a cup of coffee.

‘I made coffee’ he mumbled as if that mere fact warranted forgiveness for breaking and entering the Caffrey residence. 

Neal made his way over to the freshly brewed pot on the counter. ‘How’d you get in anyway? Never mind, don’t tell me’ he immediately added. Some things were better left unexplained. 

‘You can thank me later’ Mozzie said as he threw a large brown envelope on the table right under Neal’s nose.

Neal groaned in response to the subterfuge — typical Mozzie. He took a few steps, picking up the unsealed envelope and pulling out it’s contents. It didn't take long for him to figure out what he was looking at. 

‘What the hell, Moz! Have you been following Sara around? Do you have a death wish?’

‘What are you talking about? You made it abundantly clear you wanted me to do this for you’ Mozzie replied with a satisfied smirk.

Neal’s eyes grew in desperation and his voice rose a full octave as he spoke. ‘When did I make it abundantly clear I wanted you to do this?’

‘In the car. After you finished talking to her. It was obvious you wanted to stake out this guy’s place.’

‘I believe my exact words were ‘Sara doesn't want me snooping around so I’m going to respect her wishes’.’

Mozzie appeared confused. ‘Technically maybe but…’

‘Moz!’ Neal began, shaking his head back and forth and returning his gaze to the photographs. 

He tried his best to appear indignant but curiosity got the better of him and he began studying the pics more closely, examining the expression on his wife’s face in each and every shot. She looked relaxed, happy, her smile easy, her eyes sparkling. 

‘Were these all taken inside his house?’ he asked.

There were two dozen or so shots of Randall Piper, looking like a smooth operator and Sara looking… like her usual beautiful, confident self — not that she was throwing her arms around him or acting inappropriately in any way. There was just something about the way her eyes shone and her teeth sparkled as she smiled at Piper — like they were sharing a secret only the two of them were privy to. 

Neal scowled as he stared; that was just plain ridiculous. It was simply two people, working side by side, enjoying each other’s company - nothing more. In most of the photographs, they worked at arm’s length, examining a variety of items and seemingly exchanging information about them. In some of the pics, they were sitting across from each other, sharing a cup of tea and Neal did a double take of one photograph in particular where Sara was doing that hair flip thing she did when she was acting flirty. He studied that one a little longer, then placed it alongside the others. In another one, Sara had her arm on his as she laughed and in yet another, Piper had his hand on the small of her back as they appeared to be exiting one of the rooms in the house.

As he well knew, pictures could be made to tell any number of stories. All in all, it was all fairly innocuous looking stuff if you were a confident, self-assured man who had complete trust in your wife’s devotion and fidelity yet Neal could feel his blood pressure rising as he examined them.

‘Did you bug the place?’ he asked.

‘Did you want me to bug the place?’ Mozzie countered.

‘NO!’ Neal shouted most unconvincingly.

‘Because I could put something in Sara’s purse…’

‘No Moz!’ Neal cried out. ‘Do NOT put a bug in Sara’s purse! Do you hear me?’

Mozzie did hear him.

But he also knew what Neal was really saying.

WCWCWC

‘What do you think of this one?’ Hope asked, pointing to the picture of a young bride in the magazine she’d picked up at the train station.

‘Nice’ Cameron replied absentmindedly.

‘What’s the matter?’ she asked, linking her arm in his and leaning against his shoulder.

‘Nothing… it’s just that leaving home feels weird. I can’t believe how quickly I fell back into the groove of living on the farm.’

‘It’s a whole other life than the one we’re living in New York, that’s for sure’ she said, her voice quiet.

The faint sound of the train’s wheels resonated against the tracks, the soft timbre soothing and comforting as the couple spoke quietly.

‘Do you ever wish you’d stayed in Watertown and gone to school there?’ she asked.

‘No’ Cam was quick to respond. ‘I really wanted to study art history and I knew there was so much more I could learn in New York. And besides’ he added with a warm smile. ‘I never would have met you.’

Hope returned the smile and slid under his arm, curling up against his chest. ‘Your family is wonderful, Cam. They’re all so different.’

‘I know, sometimes it’s hard to believe we all have the same parents’ Cam nodded in agreement. ‘But we all have the same values and beliefs and that’s what keeps us united.’

‘I feel really lucky to be marrying into your family. Do you think your mom will be disappointed about me not changing my name?’

‘Secretly, she probably wishes you would but she’d never say anything’ he admitted. ‘Besides, you already have a hyphenated name. Which one would you drop? Ellis or Caffrey?’

‘I can’t imagine having to drop either one of them. Both my folks mean so much to me’ she admitted wistfully.

Cameron nodded knowingly. ’Is your dad picking us up at the station?’

‘No, he’s driving up to Syracuse to be with Liam’ she said, checking her watch. ‘He’s probably leaving home right about now.’

‘Is this about the thing that happened with whatsisname?’

‘Todd. Yeah. Liam decided he wants to visit him in hospital but he’s pretty shook up about the whole thing. You know Dad… always ready to jump on his white horse and ride to the rescue.’

Cameron chuckled. This, he did know about his future father-in-law. ‘He wouldn't be your dad otherwise. I guess he’ll be hanging around the hospital when you go in for your surgery next week, huh?’

‘Try and stop him’ Hope giggled.

‘I wouldn't dare.’

‘You’re sure you’re all right about me asking Aunt Elizabeth to help with the wedding?’

‘Yeah, I told you. Whatever you want is fine with me. Anyway, she can’t take over if you don’t let her.’

Hope pulled away and looked into his eyes. ‘You’re kidding, right?’

WCWCWC

Neal’s mind was all over the map as he drove, the purring of the car heater his only company. Mozzie’s visit and his unexpected ‘gift’ had left him rattled although he wasn't quite sure why. Those pictures were snapshots of his wife as he’d always known her: smiling, friendly, kind and professional. 

Well, mostly professional. 

Over the years, Neal had had the opportunity of working cases with Sara Ellis - especially back when he was with the FBI. She was always a team player, easygoing, competent, knowledgeable, efficient… but of course, those cases hadn't involved working with an ex-boyfriend. 

He recalled the case of the missing Stradivarius and how he’d been forced to watch from the sidelines as Sara tried to bamboozle Bryan McKenzie by flirting with him. He’d been annoyed at how easily she’d slipped into the role of seductress - even though they weren't even dating at the time. Still, watching her throw herself at McKenzie had irked Neal to such an extent he hadn't been able to keep from entering into a pissing contest with the guy. 

But this thing with Piper… he knew he was being silly. Sara was his wife of almost twenty-five years, the mother of his children, his best friend, his lover, his confidante. Their marriage was rock solid and they had a full and loving relationship - well, except for the part where he didn't dare make love to her for fear of falling flat on his face. But then again, by the weekend, he was hoping to have dealt with that issue once and for all. 

And then, they’d be perfect again and maybe she would stop smiling at Randall Piper the way she’d been smiling at him in those stupid photographs. 

WCWCWC

Sara arrived on 94th Street, her heart beating a little faster than she would have liked. She had butterflies in her stomach, the likes of which she hadn't felt for quite some time and she couldn't quite understand why. Her relationship with Piper was purely platonic; he was a client and nothing more. She had a wonderful, full life with Neal and their kids and she couldn't ask for anything more.

Except maybe a diamond encrusted toilet brush. 

These days, the kind of life led by Randall Piper was foreign to her although she could have easily slipped into such an extravagant lifestyle when she’d first come to live in New York. Back then, with her more than adequate salary as a newly minted insurance investigator at Sterling Bosch, she’d enjoyed lavish meals out in high end restaurants, stays in the best hotels, expensive clothes and all the little extras her generous income could provide. Of course, that had been before her earnings were highjacked to provide for the necessities of life: a mortgage on a house in suburbia, diapers, an endless parade of kids’ sneakers, tuition for art classes and basketball camps, groceries for a couple of growing teenagers and some savings so she and Neal could afford to put three kids through university. 

Not that she had any regrets about the choices she’d made. She didn’t. 

It was just oddly disconcerting to find herself working in close proximity with someone who lived such an extravagant life knowing she would never experience such opulence. Even though Sara had many wealthy clients, some of whom lived obscenely lavish lives, her contacts with them were usually limited to phone conversations or meetings in the offices of Sterling Bosch. She didn't do the hands on stuff much anymore, preferring to delegate the nitty gritty tasks to her underlings. Seeing all this up close and personal had opened up a whole new world she’d all but forgotten about.

She wasn't naive enough to think Randall Piper lived a charmed life, devoid of worries. No one running such an important conglomerate did so without troubles of their own but at the moment, all she could see was the shiny veneer of such a life: the beautiful homes, the gorgeous art, the amazing baubles and the freedom that came with having seemingly unlimited wealth.

The wonderful smell of coffee and cinnamon hit her nostrils when she stepped into the home and Randall’s manservant escorted her into the formal dining room where she found the man himself, sitting at the oversized dining room table with a cup in his hand and a small gift box on the lace tablecloth next to him. 

‘Good morning’ he said as she stepped in. 

He stood to greet her and took her arm, directing her to a chair to the right of the one where he'd been sitting. ‘I thought we needed a hearty breakfast before we got started with our busy day.’

Sara looked at the table, set with fine china and an overabundance of fruit and pastries: Kouing Amann, buttery croissants, chocolatines, cinnamon danishes, blueberry scones - carb central. Freshly squeezed juice was already poured into the fine crystal glass in front of her chair and the aroma of fine coffee permeated the room.

‘It smells incredible in here’ she couldn't help but admit.

‘I had them fly in this special blend I thought you’d enjoy from Thailand: black ivory coffee. I hope you’ll like it.’

‘Randy, this is ridiculous’ Sara said with a girlish giggle. ‘Are you expecting your whole board of directors for breakfast?’

He smiled warmly. ‘No, just you. I was… trying to show off.’

‘Well…’ Sara said. ‘Mission accomplished.’

‘Miles, can you bring us some eggs benedict with smoked salmon’ he asked the manservant. 

So, his name wasn't Jeeves after all, Sara thought. 

‘Unless you don’t like smoked salmon’ he added, looking at Sara.

‘No… I mean yes, I love smoked salmon’ she replied. ‘Randy, this is… well, it’s lovely but I really don’t eat much in the morning.’

‘Look, we’re probably not going to have a proper meal until dinnertime so why don’t you throw caution to the wind and have a nice big breakfast to get you going.’

Sara scoffed but she let Randall pull out her chair for her. 

‘If it’s your figure you’re worried about…’ he murmured, leaning in to speak in her ear. ‘…I can assure you, you have nothing to worry about.’

‘Well, that’s because I don't normally eat like this’ she replied, pointing to the overabundance of food on the table.

She couldn’t quite figure the man out. He’d always been kind and thoughtful but was this more than that? Was he making the moves on her? Just being hospitable? It was hard to tell but Sara had to admit she was enjoying all the attention being lavished on her.

‘All right, maybe I’ll have a little’ she said as Randall nodded to Miles and sent him on his way.

‘I got you a little something’ he said, picking up the box she’d noticed when she’d first walked in.

It was brightly gift wrapped in shiny red paper with a gold ribbon tied up in a bow.

‘What? Why?’ she asked with a nervous tittle.

‘Because I want to thank you for all your help in getting me organized.’

‘Randy, this is… well, it’s too much.’

‘How do you know? You haven't even looked inside yet. Look, I realize you don't have the time to give each one of your clients all this attention and I appreciate it’ he explained. ‘Just take it. Please.’

Sara took the small package, noticing her hand was shaking slightly. It was commonplace for wealthy clients to show their gratitude with small gifts but they usually consisted of a box of high end chocolates or the odd bouquet of flowers sent to her office. This was… over the top and yet she took the package from his hand and let her finger linger on the soft ribbon, caressing it.

She tentatively gave the bow a tug, watching it fall away. The luxurious wrapping paper felt like silk and she carefully removed in, setting it aside on the table as she stared at the small velvet box hidden underneath. Obviously some piece of jewelry, she thought as her trembling hand prepared to reveal what was inside. 

‘Oh my God!’ she cried out as she spied the contents.

Sara had seen enough cameo jewelry to distinguish the real thing from the cheap knock-offs. This particular brooch was exquisite, the cameo’s ivory set against a pale brown background. She felt her breath hitch as she admired it, knowing full well its value.

‘This is crazy Randy. I can’t accept this.’

‘Of course you can’ he replied. ‘I want you to have it.’

‘But… it’s too much.’

He reached out and touched her hand, his eyes staring into hers. ‘Look, I could never afford to get you something like this back then. Just call it a deferred gift from the time we were together.’

Sara could feel her breathing growing uneven and her head began to swim. She took a couple of steadying breaths and hoped she wouldn't pass out. This was crazy and yet she didn't argue when Randall took it from her hand and pinned it onto the lapel of the dark jacket she was wearing. 

It looked absolutely perfect.

He smiled warmly and reached for the pot of coffee, pouring her a cupful.

‘Now, come on. Drink up. We have a lot of work to do.’

TBC


	39. Chapter 39

The weather wasn't nearly as clement as it had been the day before but Mozzie soldiered on, settling in on a nearby park bench to listen to the goings-on in the Piper residence on 94th Street. The odd wet snow flurry rained down on his covered head and the wind had picked up somewhat, making the whole experience a lot less pleasant than it had been the previous day. Even with his high powered camera lens and quality binoculars, some of the rooms in the house, especially those on the second floor, were simply out of view. At least this time, Mozzie had the added benefit of eavesdropping on some of the conversations between Sara and her client, thanks to the trusty listening device he’d slipped into the lining of Sara’s winter coat.

But he’d been at it for several hours and the novelty was wearing off, the whole thing becoming rather… repetitive. 

‘ _Oh, that’s beautiful Randall!’_

_‘I picked that up on my last visit to Taiwan.’_

Or

_‘That’s gorgeous, Randy!’_

_‘I bought that at an estate sale back in 2000.’_

Or

_‘I love this one!’_

_‘I picked that up for a song when the Kunstpalast got rid of some of their stuff.’_

The other annoying thing was the excessive static due, in part, to the sub-par quality of the Russian surplus receiver Mozzie was using - he was really due for an update on his equipment. But there was also the fact that the voices were muffled, not the clear, crisp sound he might have gotten if he’d managed to plant a bug directly on one of his marks - or on Sara’s purse. A handbag or attaché case were always a better, cleaner plant but he _had_ promised Neal he wouldn't bug Sara’s purse and Mozzie was nothing if not a man of his word.

He’d actually considered knocking on the door and introducing himself as a neighbourhood canvasser, try to get close enough to plant a bug directly in one of the rooms but he didn't know _which_ room they’d be using and the last thing he wanted was to accidentally run into Sara as he scurried away, like the sneaky mole that he was.

So, he’d compromised… that’s what one did in life: play the hand one was dealt.

On the plus side, Sara and her client had set up a work station at the man’s dining room table, a few feet away from where Sara had carelessly thrown her coat upon entering. Mozzie had to concede that the whole exercise would have been useless if he’d been forced to listen to the crickets - or whatever other critter - might be inhabiting the front hall closet.

As the hours passed, a pattern emerged. A member of Randall’s household staff would bring in one of the items from his extensive collection and place it on the dining room table for appraisal - where, Mozzie had heard the man say, the light was at its best. He and Sara would discuss, sometimes ad nauseum, the provenance of the item in question, where it had been obtained, how much he’d paid for it, how long he’d had it and then Sara would do the obligatory fawning over the originality/beauty/uniqueness/artistry/symmetry/delicacy of the piece and they would discuss its current value, consigning the appraised worth to the long list of items to be insured.

Frankly, except for the interesting little exchange between Sara and Piper at breakfast, the whole thing was becoming tedious and rather boring. When Sara had first arrived that morning, Mozzie had listened in with interest as her client had presented her with a mystery gift - a mystery only to Mozzie since neither one of them had described said item in detail, except to say it was much too expensive for Sara to accept.

Which she did in the end anyway as Mozzie rolled his eyes - channelling Neal.

It was a piece of jewelry from what he could tell from Sara’s over-the-top fawning. To his dismay, Mozzie had had to compromise on his sight line into the home’s stately dining room which was located towards the back of the house. Even with his high powered binoculars, Mozzie was unable to get a good view through the side windows and consequently, he’d had to make do with listening in instead.

Whatever Piper had given Sara was small, that much he’d ascertained although everybody knew expensive things came in small packages. And it _had_ been expensive - if Sara’s reaction was any indication. She’d gone on and on about how she couldn't possibly accept such an extravagant gift and he went on and on about how she absolutely _had_ to… a couple of teenagers arguing about who was going to pay for the root beer floats.

By early afternoon, his toes and ears were freezing and Mozzie had been considering packing it in for the day when the insurance investigator and her client began discussing an item which caught his attention - a Pollock. For weeks now, Neal had been prattling on about a case he and Peter were helping Jones with. Something about the owner of the Pruitt Gallery claiming that a Pollock he’d bought from one of his art dealers was a fake.

Jackson Pollock had been a very prolific artist and the odds were astronomically low that the painting in Piper’s home was the missing original Peter and Neal were looking for. But still… the conversation caught Mozzie’s ear and he leaned in to listen, trying to glean some details about the item Sara and Randall Piper were examining. … _24 by 36… earlier piece… picks up the light… autumn shades…_ Mozzie tried in vain to recall what Neal had said about the painting.

_‘I have three other lesser known Pollocks at my place in the Hamptons’_ Mozzie heard the man say.

_‘Which ones?’_ Sara was heard asking.

_‘To be honest, I can’t remember the titles but they’re part of a series of twelve paintings he did early on.’_

Mozzie’s spidey senses tingled as he listened. Maybe he could manage to focus Neal’s attention on this latest bit of information instead of the fact that his wife was accepting expensive gifts from a virtual stranger.

He tugged on his hat to better cover his ears and wiggled his toes in an effort to keep warm as he leaned in to keep listening.

WCWCWC

The inpatient psychiatric ward at Upstate Medical University looked like every other floor in the large hospital with one major difference: the door to the ward was kept locked at all times.

Neal held Liam’s elbow as they stepped off the elevator and he watched as Liam walked up to the desk right outside the reinforced door and waited for the guy who was seated there to look up at him.

‘I’m here to see Todd Greenway’ he said.

The man picked up a clipboard and glanced down at it. ‘Name?’

‘Caffrey, Liam.’

The guy nodded and pointed in the direction of the door just as a loud click was heard.

‘Room 603’ he said.

Liam gave his dad one last glance and pulled on the door handle, disappearing behind the heavy metal door. Understandably, he was nervous about the encounter even though Mike Perry had interceded on his behalf, to make certain Liam’s company would be welcome.

It was.

Which made Liam all the more anxious about coming face to face with his ex-boyfriend. He wanted to strike the right balance: convey his concern for the young man who’d touched his heart without giving him the impression he was interested in resuming their previous relationship.

He heard soft voices coming from the half closed door of room 603 but not Todd’s - another male voice and the soft voice of a woman. He almost turned back and ran the other way but he took a deep breath and gave a quiet knock on the door. There was movement inside and a young woman appeared, staring back at him with Todd’s bright blue eyes.

‘Hi’ the woman said with a smile. ‘You must be Liam. I’m Monica, Todd’s sister. Come on in.’

Liam nodded, his voice momentarily failing him and he peeked inside the room where he found three other people including an older man and woman - ostensibly Todd’s parents. There was a bed in the room but Todd was sitting up in a chair by the window, fully clothed with a book on his lap, looking calmer than Liam had ever seen him. The clothes he was wearing surprised Liam: a pair of jeans and a sensible sweater - much more down to earth than anything Liam had ever seen him wear.

Todd got to his feet, his pale face brightening somewhat as he took a few tentative steps towards the door. Liam wasn't sure what to do - hug him… not hug him but when the two men embraced, it seemed like the most natural thing in the world.

‘Hey’ Liam said as they pulled out of the embrace. ‘How you doing?’

He wanted to stick his boot up his ass as he heard the echo of his voice resonating in the room - _‘How you doing?’_ Seriously…

‘I’m okay’ came the surprise answer.

Liam glanced at the other occupants of the room and Todd took his arm, tugging him closer to the older couple who by now had gotten to their feet.

‘These are my parents’ Todd said flatly. ‘And you met my sister, Monica.’

‘Hi’ Liam said with a small wave. ‘I hope I’m not interrupting anything.’

Todd was silent, seemingly dumbstruck. It was Monica who spoke up, a gentle smile on her face. ‘No, of course not. Todd’s roommate told us you’d be coming by.’

Todd’s dad cleared his throat and gave his wife a gentle shove with his elbow. ‘Why don’t we get some coffee… or something. Let these guys chat for a while.’

The woman examined Liam up and down, her gaze stern.

‘Come on Monica’ she said to her daughter.

The young woman looked from her brother to her parents and Liam noticed Todd reaching out, taking her hand in his as if he were reaching out for a lifeline. His face had grown more sombre and Liam watched as the young woman squeezed her brother’s hand and tapped him on the shoulder.

‘I can stay if you want me to’ she said, turning to look at him.

Todd nodded and sighed in relief. However strained his relationship was with his parents, Liam could see that, in his time of need, his ex was taking comfort in his sister’s presence. He had a fleeting recollection of Todd mentioning her name, talking about the fun they’d had when he’d gone home for the holidays.

Although physically at least, Monica resembled their mom, she had none of the apparent harshness of the older woman who stood there with her face grim.

‘Whatever…’ Mrs. Greenway said as she gave her husband a gentle shove towards the door.

‘It was nice to meet you’ the man said to Liam as the two of them departed.

WCWCWC

Neal watched the back of Liam’s sandy blonde head bob down the hallway through the glassed half of the secure door. He’d been quiet on the way over and Neal knew that he’d likely be a lot more talkative on the way back - or so he hoped. Liam had given him the 411 on his visit with the counsellor at the university. He’d confided that Catherine Keene had helped him focus on what he wanted to say to his ex - and just as importantly what he wanted to _avoid_ saying. 

Neal waited until Liam disappeared from sight and turned to address the young man at the reception desk, preparing to ask where he might be able to get a cup of coffee.

‘There’s a sitting room halfway down the hall if you want to wait there’ the fellow manning the desk said, pointing in the other direction.

As advertised, there was a rather small waiting room around the corner with about twelve to fifteen chairs, a couple of tables and a television hanging from the ceiling. It was tuned to one of those lifestyle shows and some guy was showing a couple of overly enthusiastic women how to create a vase using tissue paper and an empty jar of spaghetti sauce.

There was one other person in the room: a middle-aged woman sitting in one of the chairs underneath the large window with a book in her lap. Neal attempted to make eye contact with her — to no avail — and headed to a small table where he found a very sad looking pot of coffee, looking like it had been sitting there since the early morning.

He decided to pass on the refreshments and settled in a chair kitty corner to the woman, facing the door and began to peruse the pile of dog-eared magazines sitting on the table next to him, looking for something of interest. He settled on a New Yorker magazine dated eight months earlier and he reached in his jacket pocket for his reading glasses, placing them on the tip of his nose.

He’d barely begun to leaf through the magazine when a couple came in, looking rather distraught. Neal estimated them to be in their late fifties, early sixties. The woman was barely five feet tall and of tiny build, as if she might blow away if a strong wind suddenly swooped in. The man was just short of six feet with salt and pepper hair, the likes of which Neal rather admired considering his present predicament. Their eyes met briefly and Neal couldn't help but notice something vaguely familiar about him; he gave the man the quick once over, unable to put his finger on the reason for his gut feeling. The couple walked past him and settled in a couple of chairs directly behind Neal, making it impossible to study him any further although he could hear the woman’s loud sigh as she sat down.

‘So that’s the famous Liam’ she murmured to her husband.

Neal felt his heart start to pump a little faster.

‘Good looking young man’ the man said.

‘Aren’t they alway’ the woman said snarkily. ‘God damn shame if you ask me.’

Neal could feel the man looking over his shoulder to see if anyone was listening and Neal returned his eyes to his magazine.

‘Don’t be so rude Jillian. The gays hate it when people say that.’

‘It’s true though’ she whispered loud enough for Neal to hear. ‘It’s such a waste of a good looking guy.’

Neal felt his pulse growing rapid and took a deep breath to keep himself in check.

‘I hope he doesn't mess with Todd’s head’ the man said, his voice quiet. ‘Just when we’re finally getting him to see reason.’

Although he couldn't see their faces, Neal could hear the tightness in their voices. In his peripheral vision, he could see the woman leaning in closer to the man so she could whisper in his ear.

‘You’ll see, we’ll get him home and work on him. Maybe we could introduce him to Jim and Doris’ daughter, Julie. Try to get him to see sense.’

The man tsked, seemingly annoyed. ‘Don’t you think we’re beyond that, Jillian?’

He let his voice drop even further. ‘I think we’re going to have to accept that Todd is… you know, the way he is.’

‘No’ the woman replied curtly. She glanced over her shoulder to see if Neal was listening and she leaned into her husband whispering, although Neal could hear perfectly well what was being said.

‘I will _never_ accept it. It’s a sin, John.’

Neal could feel his blood boiling and glanced over at the woman who was sitting nearby, pretending not to listen to the conversation. If she hadn't been there, he might have said something, introduced himself, try to talk some sense into these idiotic parents.

‘We’ve got bigger problems than the fact Todd is…’ the man said, leaving his sentence unfinished. ‘Like keeping him from… you know…’

Neal turned and glanced furtively over his shoulder as the man made a motion as if he was slitting his wrists. The woman just glared at him.

Suddenly, there was a young woman standing in the doorway to the room, holding a pile of papers in her arms.

‘Mrs. Sunjata’ she said, addressing the woman who’d been sitting there alone. ‘You can see your husband now.’

The woman jumped to her feet as if she’d been sprung from prison and gave Neal a polite smile as she exited, leaving him alone with Todd’s parents.

Neal stood, pretended to stretch and strode over to the window, looking out as if checking the weather. He looked over at the couple and the woman gave him a tight, controlled smile. Neal took a few steadying breaths, trying to decide if he should speak up or not. He pretended to look through the pile of magazines once more.

‘Anyway’ the woman said, her voice quiet. ‘What’s a good looking guy like that who plays basketball doing with…’ she said between clenched teeth ‘… other men.’

That, as it turned out, was the last straw. Neal took a deep breath and turned to face her.

WCWCWC

‘Come on in, sit down’ Monica Greenway said.

Todd took a seat, his hand still clasped in Monica’s and Liam took the spot on the other side of him. Todd’s eyes were focussed on his hands, his thumb rubbing up and down Monica’s knuckles as he caressed them. Liam immediately noticed the other man’s eyes were misty - whether it was sadness or some other emotion, he couldn't quite tell from the placid look on his face. In all the time he’d known him - with the exception of the night they’d broken up - Liam had never seen Todd cry. Now, he wondered if the almost manic state his ex-boyfriend always seemed to be in wasn't related to his condition.

‘I’m sorry’ Todd murmured, wiping away a tear. ‘I’ve been having trouble controlling my emotions lately.’

Liam couldn't help but place his hand on the man’s back, giving him a couple of comforting pats.

‘No need to apologize’ he said, his voice gentle.

Monica looked over at Liam and smiled. ‘Todd was really happy to hear you were dropping by’ she said.

Examining his face, it was obvious to Liam that Todd was on some sort of medication, dulling his emotions - perhaps some form of anti-anxiety drug which wouldn't be surprising, considering his recent trauma. His eyes were lifeless, his skin pale, his gait unsteady; a shadow of his former self.

Liam could feel the unease growing and thought back to his conversation with Catherine, searching for something appropriate to say.

‘I read your note’ he said, instantly wishing he could kick himself. He hadn’t meant to say that but somehow it had slipped out just the same.

Todd looked at him. ‘I didn’t want you to feel bad, Liam’ he said. ‘I haven't been well for a long time. I was just… I was trying to hide it from you. I’m sorry I didn't tell you about… you know.’

‘I get it. It’s not easy to open up’ Liam replied, hesitating to say more. He wanted to tell Todd he was there for him but he was afraid the man might misinterpret his intentions. He recalled Cat’s words that honesty was the best policy.

‘I’ve been worried about you, Todd. And I’m sorry you’re in so much pain’ he continued, leaning in to try to make visual contact. ‘What we had, it meant a lot to me too. _You_ mean a lot to me.’

Todd’s eyes seemed to perk up and Liam felt the need to clarify what he’d just said.

‘I’ll never stop caring about what happens to you… even if we’re not together anymore.’

Todd nodded and forced a small smile.

‘I meant what I said in the note. It’s not your fault’ Todd said, his voice even. ‘I was already… messed up before we met and when we started seeing each other, it just gave me something positive in my life.’

‘I know… it was good for me too. But I’m struggling with my own stuff and I… well, I want to be here for you as a friend but it can never be more than that… it can’t be like before Todd.’

Monica smiled and brought her hand to rest on her brother’s back in a show of support.

‘Todd…’ Liam said tentatively. ‘I’m really glad you’re still here with us. I hope you’ll take the help that’s being offered and try to get better. A lot of people are pulling for you.’

There was an awkward silence as Todd continued to stare down at his hands. Liam wondered if coming to see him hadn’t been a terrible mistake.

‘Mike tells me you’re thinking about going home to Denver for a while’ he said, feeling the need to fill the silence.

Todd nodded and Monica piped up.

‘We’re looking into some programs back home but…’ she glanced nervously in the direction of the door. ‘I’m not sure that’s the best thing for Todd. I’m trying to get my parents to go for counselling as well. There’s some stuff they need to work through if they want to be truly supportive.’

‘There’s a mental health clinic affiliated with the university’ Liam said. ‘Would that be an option?’

Todd shrugged. ‘I guess… I’m so confused.’

Liam exchanged looks with Monica, unsure how he could be of help. Todd looked from one to the other.

‘I’m really tired’ he announced, getting to his feet. ‘Would you mind…’

Liam followed suit, standing to face the man. He nodded. ‘Of course, you need your rest.’

Todd walked over to the bed and climbed in, lying on his side, his eyes wide open. ‘Thanks for coming Liam’ he said with a weak smile. ‘Maybe you’ll come back and see me again?’

Liam took a deep breath. ‘Sure’ he said. ‘I’d like that.’

Todd’s eyes closed and Monica motioned to the door. ‘Come on, I’ll walk you to the elevator.’

Liam gave one last longing look in the direction of his ex-boyfriend, looking so frail and vulnerable and he followed her out of the room.

WCWCWC

The art of persuasion was something Neal Caffrey had always excelled at. Throughout his life, he’dbeen called upon to slip into the skin of a variety of disreputable characters, crafting cons big and small, executing them flawlessly and leaving people feeling good about themselves even as he bamboozled them out of their hard earned money. Persuading someone, anyone, to come around to his way of thinking was second nature for a man like Neal but having to put those particular skills into practice as it pertained to his son’s sexuality was something he’d never imagined he’d have to do.

This time, the issue was personal and he couldn't stand by and listen to people dissing his son’s lifestyle. Liam and every gay man and woman deserved to live full lives, devoid of persecution - especially when it came to members of their own families. He took a deep breath and a few steps, standing directly in front of the couple he now knew to be Todd’s parents.

‘Excuse me’ he said, trying very hard to keep his temper in check. ‘I couldn't help but overhear.’

The couple looked up at him, obviously ill at ease.

‘I’m Neal Caffrey, Liam’s father.’

Jillian Greenway’s eyes grew to the size of saucers as her husband got to his feet and put out his hand in greeting.

‘I’m John Greenway and this is my wife Jillian.’

‘I figured as much’ Neal said, taking a seat directly across from them.

It would do no good to stand over them and make them feel intimidated. This was a delicate operation that required tact and diplomacy and being face to face was the best way to go about it. He wanted to make a point but he needed to do it without being preachy or condescending - or rude.

‘I’ve met Todd’ Neal continued, his voice calm. ‘He’s a fine young man, very caring.’

Jillian Greenway scoffed but her husband smiled in response. ‘Yes, he is.’

‘Liam tells me Todd was really helpful when he first started school here last fall.’

The couple listened, shell shocked that they’d been overheard chastising their son - and Liam.

‘I heard what you were saying about my son being gay. Liam came out to his mom and me when he was fourteen’ Neal explained. ‘He was a bit of a late bloomer although we’d suspected he was gay for a while by the time he finally talked to us about it. I think he was afraid it might change things between us.’

‘Did it?’ John Greenway asked.

‘Not a thing. We were just relieved he trusted us enough to confide in us. There’s nothing worse than having a secret you feel you need to keep from others, especially people you love and who love you. Nobody should have to live like that.’

Jillian Greenway finally spoke up. ‘The bible says it’s wrong.’

‘Mrs. Greenway’ Neal interrupted. ‘With all due respect, I don’t want to question your moral or religious beliefs on homosexuality. I just want to tell you about the experience we had as a family.’

‘When Sara — that’s my wife — and I started to suspect Liam might be gay, it didn't change anything about the way we felt about him. Our biggest worry was that life might be more difficult for Liam as a gay man. Nobody wants their kids to have a difficult life.’

‘I agree’ John Greenway said. ‘We worry about Todd too.’

Neal nodded. ‘I don’t think anybody would choose this lifestyle if they really had a choice, do you? It’s hard to swim against the current, to be marginalized. I happen to believe we don’t choose who we fall in love with. It’s a natural thing. And in all cases, it’s a beautiful thing.’

Mrs. Greenway sat there, listening, her lips tight.

‘I suppose’ her husband said.

‘I was reading recently how they’re discovering physiological differences between straight and gay men. You know, if a gay person could choose to be straight, then wouldn't it stand to reason that a straight person could choose to be gay?’

‘Some doctors treat homosexuals. It can be cured’ the woman said.

Neal took a deep breath; it was hard not to pontificate. The couple hadn't yet stormed out so he decided he’d offer his point of view on the matter. 

‘I did read about that’ he said. ‘But I don’t happen to think of homosexuality as a disease or something that needs to be cured. Those interventions you’re talking about have very poor long-term outcomes. Often the men who’ve gone through these kinds of treatments get married and father children only to realize they are still attracted to men. That’s hard on kids you know… watching their parents split up.’

‘I always think the best gift we can give our kids is to model being our true selves, to be honest and forthcoming. It’s a way of showing them that everybody should strive to be themselves, to live their lives honestly, without fear.’

‘It’s… unnatural’ Jillian Greenway said, her lip curling up in disdain. ‘Two men together.’

‘For you… and for me but not for my son. Or yours. For them and so many others, it’s the most natural thing in the world. And just like you and I might find the thought of being with a same sex partner… unappealing, they feel the same way about people from the opposite sex.’

‘If everybody was gay, we would no longer procreate’ the woman argued. She seemed to have all the talking points down pat.

‘That’s true’ Neal conceded. ‘But family is so much more than biology, don’t you think. My wife and I have a foster daughter and our relationship with her is just as close as with Liam and his sister. Studies show that kids thrive in a nurturing home environment whether they have two moms, two dads or a mom and a dad as long as their parents are in a committed relationship. Isn't that what’s important?’

Jillian shook her head and looked away. She didn't have an argument to Neal’s point.

‘That’s what Sara and I want for Liam. We want him to live a full, happy life and we want to support him any way we can.’

The man looked over at his wife; it was obvious to Neal that she objected to their son’s lifestyle much more stringently than her husband did.

‘I’m sure it’s been hard for you to see Todd suffering like he has’ Neal said.

‘Jillian thinks Todd has mental health issues because he’s gay’ the man said, looking over at his wife.

Neal smiled. ‘Liam is diabetic. That didn't make him gay and he’s not diabetic because he’s gay. I’m sorry Todd is having to deal with some mental health issues but they’re not the cause of his homosexuality, or vice versa. I can guarantee you that.’

Jillian Greenway stood. She was so short that she came to eye level with Neal and her husband as she stood there, tapping her foot.

‘We should get back’ she announced curtly. ‘Todd will be wondering where we are.’

Her husband stood to follow her out. He hesitated for a moment and looked over at Neal with a kind smile.

‘Thank you, Mr. Caffrey, for sharing that with us. It helps.

Neal watched them leave and sighed, relieved he’d managed to keep his cool. All he could do was hope what he’d said would help make a difference.

WCWCWC

‘I can see you’re upset’ Monica said as she and Liam made their way down the hall. ‘Don’t be. Todd’s going to get better, you’ll see.’

Liam gave her a look of skepticism; as much as he wanted to believe Todd would pull through, he couldn't help but worry. And now, knowing his ex’s parents were not supportive of his sexuality… well, it made him all the more thankful for the wonderful family he had. He wished Todd had been given the same opportunity.

‘I don’t want to give him false hopes about us’ he confided.

She nodded. ‘I get it. Don’t worry about it, you did great. You were very supportive but you were clear about how you felt. I think it did him a lot of good to see you. He talks about you a lot, you know. I think he was embarrassed about coming face to face with you.’

‘Embarrassed?’

‘Yeah, I figure it was because of the things he’d written in his note.’

Liam nodded and swallowed.

‘Liam’ she said, touching his arm. ‘You didn't do anything wrong. People break up every day and they don't try to take their own life. Todd needs professional help and he needs to start taking his medication. Because of what happened, he’s finally in a place where he can get the help he needs. Don’t worry, I’m looking out for him.’

‘If Todd decides to stay here and get help, I want you to know I’ll look out for him’ Liam explained. ‘A lot of the students here were upset about what happened and they really care about what happens to him.’

‘We’ll see. Right now, the important thing is that he continues taking his meds so he can stabilize his moods. So far, the doctors here have been great.’

‘What about your folks? Todd said in his note that they’re really struggling with him being gay.’

She nodded. ‘Yeah, our folks have a ways to go but I think I’m making progress with my dad. He’s been a little more outspoken lately in standing up to my mom. Anyway, I’m not going to give up on them, not until they give Todd the respect he deserves and the help he needs.’

Liam could see there was a strong young woman inside that diminutive little person. ‘He’s lucky to have a sister like you, looking out for him.’

‘He’s always been there for me’ she replied with a sad smile.

They’d arrived at the door and Monica punched in the code to let Liam out. Before he knew what was happening, her arms were around him in a warm embrace.

And it felt so good.

TBC


	40. Chapter 40

‘Hey ‘buddy’!’ Liam called out as he stepped into the waiting room.

Neal looked up quizzically at his son.

‘Buddy?’ he countered.

‘The guy at the desk told me my ‘buddy’ was waiting in here for me. Maybe that whole thing you’ve got going on up there is working for you after all’ Liam replied, pointing to his dad’s dark head of hair.

Neal replied with a scoff and a head shake. He got up and joined Liam, bringing his arm to rest on his shoulder.

‘So? How did it go?’

Liam shrugged. ‘I’m hungry’ he replied, sidestepping the question. Apparently, he wasn’t ready to discuss his visit with Todd just quite yet. Neal could wait him out, no problem.

The two men headed out into the late winter afternoon and climbed into the car in silence. Liam remained quiet except for reiterating his urgent need for sustenance, specifically his hankering for a large Hawaiian pizza with a side of chili cheese fries. That seemed oddly specific yet oh so random but Neal gladly acquiesced; after all, he’d come all the way to Syracuse to support his son and if that included giving in to his predilection for the bizarre food combination, so be it. 

Brody’s Place was a local hangout, popular with university types. It was located within walking distance of the main campus and you could find students there at any time of the day or night, munching on all things high in calories and generally low in nutrition. The place was relatively quiet considering it was well past the lunch rush and too early for the dinner crowd. All the same, approximately half the tables were occupied with mostly young men and women who’d stopped in for a beer or a bite to eat between classes. Neal and Liam found a quiet booth towards the back, away from prying eyes and ears. They were settled in front of a couple of cokes in the busy pizzeria when Liam finally opened up.

‘He didn’t look like himself’ he declared, looking like the wind had gone out of his sails.

‘What do you mean?’

‘Well, besides the fact he was wearing jeans and a regular old grey sweater, he was as white as a sheet and his eyes were sunken and… he didn't have that usual sparkle in his eyes.’

Neal gave him an encouraging smile. ‘That’s to be expected. He’s recovering from a suicide attempt, he’s probably on medication.’

Liam nodded in understanding; it was not surprising that Todd had seemed so unlike himself, considering the situation. 

‘Were you able to talk to him… tell him what you wanted to say?’

‘Yeah, I told him I was sorry he was going through all that and that I was glad he… he was still around.’

‘That’s good’ Neal said, nodding encouragingly.

‘But I still felt like shit… seeing him like that.’

Neal studied his son’s face, his furrowed brow, his quivering lips. He got a faraway look in his eyes. ‘You know, I used to be afraid Grandma might hurt herself’ he confided unexpectedly. ‘After my dad left, she was so depressed.’

Liam’s eyes moved to look at his dad.

‘Once, when I was five or six, I found her on the couch, passed out. I was terrified she was dead. Of course, I didn't know it at the time but it was far from the last time I would find her in that state. I was so scared. I couldn't help wondering what I’d done to make her drink like that.’

Liam frowned as he listened.

‘Of course, it had nothing to do with me. But I was young and when you’re young you think the whole world revolves around you - that you’re the cause of everything that happens. For the longest time, I thought my mom’s addiction was all my fault.’

‘But Dad, this thing with Todd has everything to do with me. It happened as a result of me breaking up with him.’

‘Liam, he said it himself in that note he left you. There were a lot of other things happening in his life that drove him to act the way he did.’

Liam didn't seem convinced. 

‘What was it that counsellor told you? That you can’t be responsible for another person’s actions. If we were, we’d live in terror every day of how people might react to the things we say and do.’

Liam returned his gaze to his drink, avoiding his dad’s inquisitive stare. Neal took it as permission to continue.

‘After your mom was attacked… when Hope got hit by that car… I walked around for months carrying around a truckload of guilt. Of course, both those things had nothing to do with me, not directly anyway. But I kept wondering, what would have happened if I’d insisted Mom go stay at your uncle Peter’s that night… of what if I’d heard that car coming before it was too late…’

Neal cleared his throat, composing himself; even though time had passed, the memories remained vivid - as did the emotions. 

‘I know you feel that your breakup with Todd was the catalyst for what happened and I know that feeling will never quite go away but… what I’m trying to tell you is I learned the hard way that guilt is the most useless emotion you can experience. It doesn't lead to anything good or productive.’

Liam nodded; Catherine Keene had delivered a similar message, reminding him that everybody was responsible for their own actions.

‘I met Todd’s parents… in the waiting room’ Neal confessed.

Liam’s eyes grew in response. 

‘I had a chat with them. His mom seems… a little uptight.’

‘What do you mean you had a chat with them? What did you do, Dad?’

‘Nothing’ Neal hastened to reply. ‘I just… introduced myself, told them I was your dad. Told them how proud Mom and I are of you, of the way you conduct yourself with integrity and dignity…how much it means to us that you be happy.’

Liam grew suspicious. He’d crossed Todd’s parents on their way back to his room and he’d noticed Mrs. Greenway was looking rather flustered. Hopefully, that wasn't his dad’s doing.

‘Mr. Greenway seemed a little more open that his wife’ Neal continued. ‘I’m hoping some of the things I said got through to him.’

The waitress returned with a large sizzling pizza with pineapple, green pepper and ham - Liam’s favourite. Neal gave it a discerning glance; he wanted to be a good sport but he feared he’d be up all night with indigestion if he decided to partake. Still, when the waitress placed a piece on his plate, he dug in.

Liam spoke up. ‘Todd’s sister seems really great. I can tell she really cares about him. He didn't let go of her hand the whole time I was there. I feel a lot better knowing she’s looking out for him.’ 

He took a fistful of fries and proceeded to bite into them with gusto. ‘He might be going back to Denver for a while.’

Neal thought back to Jillian Greenway’s comment about wanting to introduce Todd to someone’s daughter back home.

‘Todd’s mom seems to think he can be cured if he meets the right girl’ Neal said with a sad shake of his head.

‘Do people still think like that?’

‘Some do, apparently.’

‘That’s crazy… poor Todd.’

They ate in silence, Liam wolfing down an unusually large amount of food - definitely a good sign.

‘Look, I’ve been thinking, why don’t you come home with me for the weekend? I’ll even spring for a train ticket for you to get back on Sunday.’

Liam looked up, his mouth full. ‘Why?’

Neal frowned. ‘What do you mean, why? I checked and I know you don’t have any classes on Fridays and I know you don’t have a game until Monday night. Why not come home and let Mom and I spoil you a little? I can even make lasagna for you.’

Liam kept chewing, considering the offer. He’d been home at Christmas and he wasn't planning on going back until study week in mid-March. He shrugged.

‘I don’t know…’

‘Come on… three kinds of cheese’ Neal coaxed. 

‘I’m taking Mom out for Valentine’s on Saturday night but we’ll be around the rest of the weekend. Anyway, Will was asking about you when I saw him at the pet store the other day. Maybe you two could get together.’

Liam rolled his eyes. ‘Dad, I don’t need you to organize my social calendar.’

He could see the look of disappointment in his father’s eyes and returned to demolishing the half-eaten pizza. There was silence for a few minutes while each of them ruminated about what they’d just discussed.

‘Dad…’ Liam said, bringing Neal back to the present.

‘Yeah’ 

‘I know I don’t tell you very often but… I’m really glad I’ve got you and Mom in my life.’

Neal smiled, relaxing. He reached out and let his hand rest on his son’s arm. ‘The feeling’s mutual buddy.’

WCWCWC

‘Hi’ Lydia Jordan called out as she walked past Sara’s office and glanced in. ‘I wasn't expecting to see you here this late.’

Sara looked up from her computer screen, eyes unfocussed. ‘Hey… I am sooooo behind on my paperwork and Neal is out of town so I thought I’d come back here for a few hours and tackle these…’ she glanced down at her screen, ‘… ninety-two remaining e-mails. What are you doing here so late?’

‘Jim and I are meeting a fence in an hour - we finally got a lead on Mrs. Reiger’s opal ring.’

Sara raised an eyebrow and grinned. ‘Good job!’

Lydia pulled up a seat and settled in for a chat. ‘So where’s Neal?’

‘He drove up to Syracuse to spend some time with Liam.’

‘Again?’

‘Liam’s… going through some stuff and Neal thought it would do him good to have some company.’

Lydia looked her boss up and down, noticing the new suit she was wearing.

‘So…’ she said, pointing to the jacket and smirking. ‘Another new outfit, huh? Is this all for Randall Piper’s benefit?’

Sara tsked and turned away, pretending to look at her computer screen. ‘No! I just… I was due for some new clothes.’

Lydia chuckled; Sara was so easy to wind up.

‘Tell me’ Sara said, hoping to change the subject. ‘What’s been going on around here while I’ve been holed up at Randy’s place?’

‘Well, let’s see’ Lydia began, eyes rolling back in her head as if recalling the events of the last few days. 

‘There’s been plenty of excitement’ she said with a gleam in her eye. ‘Bob’s daughter’s ringette team won some big tournament in Albany and he came in and bragged about it all through the staff meeting — even brought in her stupid medal.’

Sara chuckled; she was all too familiar with her co-worker’s propensity for bragging.

‘Janice and her husband are fighting about whether or not they should have another baby’ Lydia continued. ‘And Paul’s wife’s been cheating on him.’

‘Again?’ Sara said with a sad smile.

‘Oh, and… Chloe needs to have her tonsils out’ Lydia added as an afterthought.

‘What!? Oh, no! Poor Clo-clo!’ Sara whined.

‘She’s had yet another infection and the doctor says it’s best to just yank those suckers out’ said Lydia in her usual no-nonsense way.

Sara pouted empathetically. 

‘So, I’m going to need a couple of days off next month. I’ll let you —’ 

She stopped suddenly, her eyes resting on the brooch Sara was wearing. Sara had forgotten all about it and let her eyes follow Lydia’s gaze as the woman stared down at her lapel.

‘What the hell is that?’ she said, getting to her feet and coming around the desk to get a better look.

‘Is this from Neal?’

Sara cleared her throat to cover her discomfort. ’N-n-n-o, not exactly.’

‘Not exactly?’ Lydia repeated. She was touching the brooch or rather caressing it, her eyes bulging out of her head, her mouth hanging open. ‘Either it’s from Neal or it isn’t. Which one is it?’

Sara didn’t respond which was a response in and of itself.

‘This looks like that cameo we recovered for Mrs. Van Buren, remember?’ Lydia continued as she examined the brooch.

Sara remembered the theft involving one of their oldest - and most finicky - clients all too well.

‘That thing was worth almost a hundred grand’ Lydia said, seemingly in a trance.

Sara pulled away and frowned. ‘This is not worth a hundred grand’ she muttered under her breath.

‘So if it’s not from Neal —’ Lydia began, stopping suddenly. ‘NO! You didn't get this from Piper, did you?’

Sara glanced over her friend’s shoulder, towards the outer office to make sure no one was listening.

‘Shush!’ she admonished her underling.

‘Sara and Randy sitting in a tree…’ Lydia sang with a playful grin.

‘Stop it!’ How old are you? Nine? We get presents all the time from our high end clients’ Sara attempted to reason although she knew her reasoning was weak.

‘Yeah, right…all the time’ Lydia replied, sarcasm dripping from her voice. ‘Why, Mr. Fielding sent me a bouquet of carnations he probably got for 3.99 at Walmart just last week. Sara, this is not the usual box of fancy chocolates or a gift certificate for a day at the spa. It’s a hundred thousand dollar piece of jewelry.’

‘It is NOT a hundred thousand dollar piece of jewelry’ Sara said with false self-righteousness.

She pulled her eyes away so she could continue with a straight face. ‘It’s… forty-five thousand, I looked it up’ she muttered, her voice low.

‘What?’ Lydia replied, teasing her mercilessly. ‘What did you say?’

‘Shut up!’ Sara said, sounding like a petulant pre-teen. 

‘What’s Neal going to say when he finds out your boyfriend gave you a forty-five thousand dollar gift?’

Sara glared at her. ‘I think I hear your mother calling you’ she said, turning to face her computer.

Lydia shrugged. ‘Fine, keep acting like this is all business as usual. Just let me know when the time comes, Sam has a cousin who’s an excellent divorce lawyer.’

Sara scoffed and pretended to return to her screen, ignoring Lydia’s comment. 

‘Later, Lady Di!’ Lydia called out on her way out of the door.

WCWCWC

As calm and serene as life had been on the old Armstrong homestead, there was something to be said for being back in Manhattan. There was a vibrancy and an excitement pulsating around her when Hope was surrounded by beautiful art - it was as if the gallery was a living, breathing thing. 

‘I’m glad everything went well with your in-laws’ Peter said as he slipped into his coat. ‘But I have to say it’s great to have the two of you back. It’s been a busy week.’

‘Well, it’s nice to be back. And now that everything is out in open about the wedding, Cam and I can’t wait to start planning.’

Peter’s face grew serious. ‘Yeah, about that…’ he began, his voice slowing. ‘You might want to brace yourself for your aunt Elizabeth. She’s picking me up in five minutes and she’s… well, she’s a little overexcited about this upcoming wedding.’

‘A little overexcited?’ Hope repeated. She’d been around Elizabeth Burke long enough to know the woman didn't do anything halfway.

‘She may or may not be dropping off some magazines for you to —’

He hadn’t finished his sentence when the door to the gallery flew open and Elizabeth stood there against the backdrop of blowing snow. Her arms were loaded up with bags and a large leather portfolio. 

She let out a loud sigh. ‘Oh my God, I couldn't find any parking out there’ she complained.

‘Hey honey’ Peter said, stepping up to where she stood and taking a couple of bags from her.  
‘You should have stayed in the car, I was just about to come out.’

Elizabeth smiled brightly, her foul mood dissipating. ‘No, I wanted to come in and drop some stuff off for Hope.’

At the sound of her name, Hope turned to face her aunt. She’d been trying to fade into the background, apparently without success.

‘Hey, Aunt Elizabeth!’ she called out, moving in to hug her.

‘Oh honey, I’m so glad you’re here’ Elizabeth replied, hugging her back. ‘Your mom told me the wonderful news.’

Hope smiled and glanced over at her uncle, whose eyes were bulging out of his head.

‘Yeah, it’s really happening’ Hope replied quietly.

‘Well, I know you haven't asked me officially…’ Elizabeth said, waiting for Hope to interrupt her.

Hope stood there smiling, without a word.

‘Anyway, I brought over a few things you might want to look at, you know some ideas for wedding themes and some pictures of dresses and hairstyles. You know, with your amazing hair we could do so many different styles…’

She began to unload stuff onto the small counter as Peter and Hope exchanged distraught glances. Hope’s eyes were silently pleading for his help and Peter took pity on her. 

‘El, honey, you don’t want to overwhelm the poor kid’ he began as Hope’s phone beeped.

She glanced down, a text from her dad, welcoming her home and telling her he was bringing Liam home for the weekend.

‘I really need to respond to this’ she fibbed as she pulled away and brought up Cam’s name on her phone.

‘HELP’ she texted. ‘Tell me you need me upstairs. NOW!’

She turned to face her aunt with a bright smile as El continued to remove one thing after another from the bags she’d just brought in.

‘Hope!’ came Cameron’s voice from the second floor. ‘I need you up here for a minute.’

Hope looked at her aunt, shrugging. ‘Sorry Auntie El…’

‘Oh, that’s okay. Why don’t I leave this stuff for you to look at and we can talk about it later.’

Peter’s hand was already on his wife’s elbow, pointing her towards the door.

‘HOPE!’ Cam called out a second time.

Elizabeth gave Hope a bright smile and a hug as Peter pushed her out the door. He glanced over his shoulder at Hope with a tortured look on his face. 

‘Sorry’ he mouthed as the couple disappeared into the night.

Footsteps were heard coming down the stairs and Cameron appeared.

‘What was that all ab —. Holy shit! What is all this stuff?’ he asked as he came into the main room.

‘That…’ Hope said with a shrug, ‘…was our wedding planner.’

WCWCWC

Neal lay on the king size bed at the local Best Western, checking his phone. Mozzie had been sending him texts all day - a play by play of the goings-on inside the home of Sterling Bosch’s latest ultra-rich client. Frankly, he could have done without the hour by hour colour commentary but, despite his attempts at appearing disinterested, he hadn't been able to keep himself from checking his phone repeatedly throughout the day for updates. 

Mozzie had sent along some pics as well as a couple of audio clips of Sara and Piper chatting amicably. The quality of sound had been so awful it was hard to make anything out but it had still managed to get Neal’s blood boiling.

In his usual state of excitement, Mozzie had seen fit to mention that Piper owned a Pollock, convinced it was the original of the one Neal and Peter had seen at the Pruitt Gallery. He’d excitedly reported that Piper had also mentioned he had three others at his place in the Hamptons. Of course, the mere possibility that this could be the same painting had Mozzie salivating; he loved any and all intrigues that fit into his narrative of conspiracy theories.

M: I’m telling you Neal, this could be the one you’re looking for

N: Do u know how many Pollocks are out there?

M: Guessing a couple of 100s

N: 363 

Silence

N: Get over it Moz. It’s NOT Number 27.

M: It could be

Neal could almost hear the whining in the other man’s voice.

N: If u find out anything else, let me know.

More than anything else, Neal was perturbed by what Mozzie had described as some mystery gift Piper had given Sara. By Mozzie’s account, which couldn't always be counted on for accuracy, it was an expensive piece of jewelry. Neal had to admit the guy had balls, offering a married woman a piece of jewelry — it seemed like a very intimate gift for someone you knew professionally. Of course, it was anybody’s guess what Randall Piper’s true intentions were but the truth was Sara had brought home lots of gifts from clients over the years. Maybe, hold off on pushing the panic button just yet, he tried to reason.

As much as he’d tried to resist Mozzie’s offer to continue spying on the proceedings, he’d ended up giving him the green light — as long as he remained discreet and didn't get caught. 

Sara’s wrath would be over the top if she ever found out.

Neal stretched out on the bed and replayed his conversation with Liam. He was confident his son was coping as well as could be expected, considering recent events. Liam had passed on sharing his dad’s hotel room, opting instead to return to his dorm for the night. However, he had accepted Neal’s offer to come home for the weekend and get away from all the drama for a couple of days. 

Neal was glad for the company driving back. He sent Hope a quick text telling her about her brother’s impending visit and debated whether or not to tell Sara; keeping the news from her would make it a nice surprise.

His mind wandered to his wife, her warm smile, her deep throaty laugh, that naughty sparkle in her eyes. He felt himself stir as he thought of her warm, inviting curves, the way she looked into his eyes as she gave in to her impulses, her eyes fluttering in ecstasy, her lips parted, letting out soft, low moans of pleasure. 

He couldn't wait for them to resume their regular lovemaking schedule which, in his latest estimation, averaged about one point five encounters per week — at least since the kids had moved out. It was a far cry from the frequency of their lovemaking when they’d first met all those years ago. Of course, back then, they’d both had the stamina and the required privacy to go at it pretty well every time they slipped in between the sheets.

Then had come the lean years - when the kids were young. Between putting in a full day at work, getting dinner ready, supervising homework, giving baths and making lunches for the next day, there was little energy left for those long, satisfying lovemaking sessions they’d so enjoyed. Back then, they’d had to make do with the odd quickie before the kids woke up in the morning or, as was often the case, putting it off altogether in favour of an extra few minutes of coveted sleep. 

These days, the sex was as good as ever. Better, actually. Less athletic but more intimate, less energetic but more intense, less frequent but more meaningful. Their connection was more visceral, based on years of shared, intimate experiences - both good and bad. They knew each other’s bodies inside and out and both he and Sara were able to pick up on each other’s subtle cues: a welcoming smile, a telling look, a soft moan, a lingering touch.

Neal let his hand slide down his body, checking out the state of his junk — which, considering the very naughty thoughts presently occupying his psyche, appeared to be reacting as it should. The sound of his wife’s deep throaty voice would sure help complete the little scenario which was beginning to play out in his head. Before he knew it, he was reaching for his phone with his other hand, pressing number one on speed dial. 

‘Hey’ he said, when he heard her voice.

‘Hi, I was wondering if I was going to hear from you tonight.’

Neal sighed softly, a sound that didn't escape Sara’s discriminating ear. ‘You sound… relaxed’ she said.

‘Mmmm. Did I wake you?’ he asked, taking himself firmly in hand and beginning the slow build to what he hoped would lead to some sort of release.

‘No, I just stepped out of the shower. I stayed late at the office to catch up on some paperwork before coming home.’

Neal purred; she could be reading the assembly instructions for an Ikea bookcase and she’d still be having this effect on him.

‘How’s Liam?’ she asked, breaking the spell.

Neal let his hand drop to his side, the mood momentarily interrupted. He certainly wasn't going to be choking the chicken while they were discussing the kids.

‘He’s okay. It went well with Todd and then we went out for pizza. I asked him if he wanted to stay with me at the hotel but he insisted on sleeping at the dorm.’

‘Why don't you try to convince him to come home for the weekend? He said he didn't have any classes on Fridays.’

‘That’s a good idea’ he said meekly, not tipping his hand.

‘So… what are you wearing?’ he asked languidly, his hand returning to the burgeoning bulge in his briefs.

‘What am I wearing?’ she repeated, incredulous. ‘Is this… is this some weird attempt at phone sex? Because, Neal, we’ve tried that before and it’s always a shit show.’

‘Just talk to me’ Neal said with a loud sigh.

‘Didn’t I offer my… services in person just a few nights ago?’ she asked with a warm chuckle.

‘Would you just shut up and talk to me’ he replied with a naughty grin.

‘Is this some sort of practice run for the weekend?’ she asked, her voice growing sultry.

Neal let out a soft moan. ‘Maybe…’ he whispered provocatively.  
Sex was the last thing on Sara’s mind at the moment but if this is what her husband needed to get his confidence back, she was more than happy to play along. 

‘What are you wearing?’ she asked, making her way to the bed and sitting up on the edge with her chenille robe wrapped around her. 

She only wore the old ratty thing when Neal was away. It was comfortable and cozy like an old pair of slippers but Neal absolutely hated it. It was ripped in a couple of spots, the hem was coming undone and it’s ugly burgundy colour was faded under the armpits. She’d once caught him trying to dump it in with the rest of the weekly garbage - and that had been five years ago. She ran her hand absentmindedly over what looked like a coffee stain and grimaced. 

‘I asked you first’ he murmured, his voice getting drowsy.

‘I told you, I just stepped out of the shower’ she replied coyly, enjoying the unmistakeable sound of arousal in his voice. ‘All I’ve got on is a towel…’

‘Oops’ she added provocatively. ‘It just slipped off.’

She heard Neal groan and some flapping noises growing louder in the background.

‘Your turn’ she purred. ‘What are you wearing?’

He glanced down at his body, an old sweatshirt on his torso and a pair of oversized track pants which he’d pushed aside in order to get his hand down into his boxers.

‘Silk sleep pants…’ he panted, his voice shaky.

Sara let herself fall on the bed, enjoying the entertainment.

‘Oooooh, which ones?’ she asked seductively. 

His mind was beginning to wander as he grew closer and closer to completion. ‘The blue ones…’ he lied, attempting to project an image she might find enjoyable. 

She grew quiet and he began to wonder if he was flying solo. ‘Is this not doing anything for you?’ he asked breathlessly. 

Sara glanced down at her nails, scrutinizing them carefully; she really needed to schedule a manicure before the week was out. 

‘No… I mean yesss…’ Sara hissed, her voice sensuous. ‘You know I love those sleep pants. The ones with that paisley motif?’

She threw in a soft moan for good measure.

‘Yeaaaah’ Neal panted, beginning to lose it.

Sara glanced at the chair beside their bed, spotting Neal’s one and only pair of royal blue silk pyjama bottoms lying there. The ones with the paisley motif. 

She grunted sexily. ‘Mmmm, the ones with the drawstring I like to tug on and rip off your body?’ she asked as she got to her feet and moved over to the closet, checking her wardrobe for an outfit to wear in the morning.

Neal matched her grunt. ‘The very ones’ he groaned. 

Sara smiled, enjoying the unexpected entertainment. If this is what it took to help Neal get out of his own head and finally realize he could function just fine between the sheets, she was all for it. 

‘Neal…’ she whispered breathlessly with a grin on her face as he she held up a blouse for examination. ‘I’m… I’m… awww, awww!’

‘Wait… wait for me babe’ he pleaded, his voice husky.

‘I… I… I…’ she moaned as she heard him gasp and let out a loud groan of satisfaction.

‘Oh my God! Oh my God!’ she shouted loudly as she threw a skirt onto the bed. 

‘Did you…’ Neal’s fading voice was heard. It sounded like he was about to drop the phone.

‘Uh huh, yeah’ Sara lied, panting. ‘That was… amazing.’ 

Except for the loud breathing on the other end, Neal had grown quiet.

‘You good baby?’ she asked, her voice sultry.

‘Yeah, yeah I’m great’ he replied breathlessly, a wide grin on his face. Seemed he could make it to the finish line after all - a most reassuring realization.

Sara continued placing her clothes on the bed and walked over to her make up table. She proceeded to start brushing her hair.

’Now I wish you were here, holding me’ she cooed, playing her role of seductress to the very end.

‘Me too babe’ Neal was sounding sleepy. ‘Saturday night… I promise. No more excuses.’

‘I can’t wait’ she murmured adoringly.

‘Neal…’

‘Yeah’

‘That was really, really hot’ she said with a satisfied sigh.

Neal got a really smug look on his face. Apparently, he still had what it took to turn his wife into a quivering bowl of jelly - even from a distance.  
‘Yeah, it was. Sleep tight, okay? I’ll call you in the morning.’

Sara stared at her reflection in the mirror. 

Horny conmen were so easily conned. 

TBC


	41. Chapter 41

By today’s standards, the Blue Moon Café was a modest little coffee house. It kept its menu simple and unpretentious and had established a loyal clientele in the quiet White Plains residential neighbourhood where it had set up shop. 

The owner was an older lady, a local resident who’d lived in Westchester County her whole life and a woman who did not suffer fools gladly. Josephine Watson, aka Crazy Josie, didn't put up with all that grande, venti, trenta crap. At Blue Moon, you could get freshly brewed coffee or decaf in a small, medium or large porcelain cup as well as homemade cookies, scones and on the days when the mood struck her, Josie’s world famous pecan brownies. If you wanted to go a little nuts, you could order a latte or a cappuccino but that was as far as it went. She didn’t do macchiatos, skinny lattes or café americanos and she considered anything but good old fashioned brewed coffee, pretentious and snotty — which she most definitely was not. 

She was proud of the fact that her shop wasn’t trendy like the Starbucks which was located three blocks over or fashionable like the nearby Munch Box, the diner where some of the local kids hung out, ingesting copious amounts of fries, burgs and greasy pizzas.

And that was exactly how Crazy Josie liked things.

The unassuming little café was located close to the local high school and on any given day, you could find the more bookish, independently minded types from White Plains High sitting at one of its dozen or so tables - no rowdy jocks at the Blue Moon Café. Caitlin had been introduced to the place by Cody and Liam who’d enjoyed its quiet simplicity. It hadn't always been easy for the boys to fit in during their high school years. Sure, they had their solid group of friends but they tended to shy away from the uber-cool students, preferring to hang out with some of their cohorts from the gay straight alliance. Even though Liam had been an accomplished athlete and Cody one of the leaders of the school’s LGBTQ community, they were not immune to barbs and sneers from some of their more unenlightened classmates - those who gravitated to the more trendy establishments. Overall, the modest coffee house had been more their style.

During her last year of high school, Caitlin had begun to tag along with the boys. She’d gotten to know the owner and had learned to appreciate her no-nonsense style - not unlike her own. When she’d come looking for a few hours of work a week to help supplement her income from her job at the day care, Josie had been happy to oblige. The rest was history.

The woman was known as a bit of a workhorse though and Caitlin had to toe the line if she wanted to remain employed - something she’d found out when she’d recently come in late for her shift. The stern warning delivered by her boss that morning hadn't fallen on deaf ears and Caitlin had been walking a straight line ever since.

For that reason, she’d been wary when her mom had called and suggested they meet up for coffee at her place of work. They hadn’t seen much of each other over the past six months mostly due to Caitlin’s hard and fast rule about spending time with her mom only when she’d abstained from drinking. Jackie Somersby had sounded sober enough on the phone but Caitlin had seen fit to warn her that if she could smell even a whiff of booze on her mom’s breath, she would march her right out the café’s door and dump her out onto the sidewalk.

To her credit, Jackie had appeared at the appointed time, seemingly sober as a judge and carrying a bouquet of Caitlin’s favourite flowers. After a brief once over by Caitlin, mother and daughter had settled in front of a couple of cups of coffee at a quiet table in the far corner of the little shop.

‘Have you heard from your brother?’ Jackie asked as they sat face to face.

‘Why would I want to talk to him?’ Caitlin replied, not bothering to look up at her mom.

‘He tells me he’s been trying to get in touch with you’ Jackie explained.

That was true enough. It had been several weeks since Jesse Davis had slunk away in the dead of night after being properly chastised by her foster dad and unceremoniously kicked out to the curb. Thus far, Caitlin had been successful in dodging the young man’s numerous attempts at contacting her. She hadn't wanted to mention it to Neal and Sara, for fear of upsetting them. Besides, she had no intention of letting him back into her life.

‘You know, Jesse is your brother, your own flesh and blood’ Jackie reminded her. ‘That’s more than you can say about your precious Caffreys.’

Caitlin glared at her mom; she was a fine one to talk about blood being thicker than water. The woman’s on-again, off-again relationship with her children was shaky at best. Over the years, Jackie had been separated from both her son and daughter for months on end, sometimes by choice, sometimes by force like when she was locked up for one of the many petty crimes she’d committed in her sad, pathetic life. On the flip side, since she’d moved into the little house in Prospect Park, Caitlin’s life had been peaceful and serene - except when she, herself, created havoc for her loving foster parents and siblings. 

‘Mom, you have no idea what he did. He showed up at the Caffreys acting all innocent, he lied to me, pretended he’d gotten mugged, played on my sympathies and then I found out he’d been plotting all along to use me so he could rob the gallery. If Mr. C. hadn’t intervened, he would have probably broken into the Raphael and stolen some stuff… maybe even my own stuff. All that for a few measly bucks.’

‘Honey, he’s just… he’s a bit of a hustler, that’s all’ Jackie said, leaning in to touch her daughter’s hand.

‘You’re kidding, right? He was ready to throw me under the bus to get what he wanted!’ Caitlin exclaimed loudly. ‘That’s not how families behave, Mom.’

She looked around, noticing Josie giving her the evil eye from behind the counter. She dropped her voice and looked at her watch, checking to see how much time was left on her break. 

Jackie stared ahead, her mouth tight. Obviously, Caitlin’s last words had irked her; she never could pass up an opportunity to express her opinion regarding her daughter’s foster parents. As far as Jackie Somersby was concerned, Neal and Sara Caffrey were just a couple of snooty do-gooders who had swept in when their mother/daughter relationship was at its lowest and stolen her daughter away from her loving arms - revisionist history at best. 

‘Look, Mom. Jesse’s no good and I don’t want to have anything to do with him anymore.’

Jackie looked down at her coffee cup and tsked. ‘You know, ever since you moved in with those people, you’ve turned against your own family. They’re no better than the rest of us…’

Her voice faded and Caitlin could see her mom glancing at something over her shoulder, something by the door of the coffee shop.

‘Mom, don’t talk like that about Sara and Mr. C’ she whispered, trying to keep people from overhearing. ‘You have no idea what you’re talking about.’

Jackie’s eyes looked ahead, obviously distracted by something - or someone - standing nearby.

Caitlin grew frustrated at her lack of attention. ‘Mom! I’m talking to you.’

Suddenly, Caitlin felt a tap on her shoulder. Before she could turn around, she heard a familiar voice, leaning in to whisper in her ear.

‘Hey sis! How ya doin’?’

WCWCWC

‘If you want, I can drop you off at the house before I check in on Grandma. Your mom’ll be thrilled to see you’ Neal offered from behind the wheel.

‘No… no, I’d like to come with you. If that’s okay’ Liam replied. ‘I haven't seen Grandma in a few weeks.’

Neal grew quiet and Liam could only guess that meant the news regarding his grandmother’s health wasn't all that great.

‘She’s not getting any better, is she?’ 

‘The short answer is no but… it fluctuates almost daily. Your mom says she was doing well when she visited two days ago and then yesterday when she popped in, she was really confused. She couldn't remember I’d gone away for a few days and she was complaining to anybody who would listen that I never came to visit.’

Liam gave his dad a sad smile. ‘That’s gotta be tough, considering you’re there practically every day.’

Neal shrugged. ‘It’s okay. I try not to take it personally. I know the confusion is just… part of getting older.’

‘I was thinking if you and Mom are going out tomorrow night, I might have a few people over to watch the hockey game or something… you know, considering it’s Valentine’s Day, some of us lonely hearts could spend the evening together, drinking beer and feeling sorry for ourselves.’

‘Sure’ Neal chuckled. ‘If you want, I could make you guys some stuff to munch on. Maybe those potato skins you like so much.’

‘That’d be great Dad. I was thinking I’d invite Will and a few of the guys who aren’t dating anyone at the moment, maybe Caitlin…’

‘Caitlin, huh?’

‘Yeah, I guess I still owe her for the way I treated her at Christmas.’

‘Well, lucky for you, if there’s one thing I know about Caitlin, it’s that she doesn't hold grudges.’

‘And also that she likes hockey’ Liam added with a chuckle.

Neal could sense that Liam was finally coming around, looking more relaxed, less tense.

‘So, you feeling better about this whole thing with Todd?’ he asked as he pulled into the Blue Skies Nursing Home’s parking lot.

‘Monica… Todd’s sister… she called me just before we left to tell me that her folks are going back to Denver today. She took some time off work and got a small place for her and Todd and she’s going to stay in Syracuse for a few months while he gets back on his feet. He’s even talking about going back to class in a couple of weeks.’

Neal nodded, his lower lip protruding. ‘That’s great news!’

He could see the frown on his son’s face. ‘Isn’t it?’

‘Yeah, yeah. It’ll be tough on him to have to face everyone after what’s happened. Todd’s… proud. Maybe… maybe I can help smooth things over.’

‘Just don’t get overly involved, okay?’ Neal reminded him.

‘Right, right.’

Neal turned off the ignition and looked up at the building that was home to his mom. He let out a long slow breath.

‘It’ll be okay, Dad’ Liam said, reading his father’s mind. ‘We’ll go in together.’

That seemed to be all the encouragement Neal needed and he opened the car door and stepped out with Liam following close behind. As usual, the calm at the nursing station belied the many issues staff were forced to deal with - issues they were faced with, each and every single day. 

One of the attendants was tending to a resident Neal knew as Mr. Mullins who had apparently soiled himself, leaving a large puddle under his wheelchair while a nurse he recognized was trying to give another resident, Mrs. Albretch, her medication. The elderly woman was fighting her every inch of the way.

‘Hi Mrs. Albretch’ Neal called out in an effort to distract her. ‘Don’t you look pretty today. That’s a lovely colour on you.’

She smiled at the gorgeous man who visited his mom almost daily; he was always friendly to her and it didn't hurt that he was so easy on the eyes. The nurse took advantage of the distraction to finish slipping the woman her medication. She gave Neal a grateful wink and a smile.

‘Mrs. Bennett is in her room’ she informed him. ‘She didn't feel up to coming to the dining room for dinner.’

Neal nodded in understanding. It was rare these days that Linda ventured out of her room - a sure sign she was beginning to give up on life. She’d always been an outgoing person, friendly to others, always willing to face off in a friendly game of cribbage or, in her younger days, seven-card stud. These days, she tended to isolate herself, unwilling or perhaps unable to join the rest of the residents in the centre’s many activities, including mealtimes. 

The two Caffrey men turned the corner and headed down towards her room. They could hear a man’s gentle voice as they entered. 

A male attendant they both recognized as Jimbo sat on the edge of her bed, holding up a spoonful of soup while Linda grimaced and turned her head away. The young man looked up, seeing Neal and Liam standing there and breaking into a smile.

‘Well, lookie here Mrs. Bennett!’ he exclaimed with enthusiasm. ‘It’s your son and your gorgeous grandson.’

Liam chuckled. Jimbo was one of the floor’s regular attendants and he’d made no secret of his massive crush on Caffrey Junior, the handsome basketball player who visited from out of town. He got to his feet and flashed Liam a smile while Neal rolled his eyes at his son.

‘Hey Jimbo, it’s been awhile’ Liam said returning the smile and turning his attention to his grandmother.

She looked like she’d lost even more weight since the last time he’d seen her - quite a feat, considering she barely tipped the scale at one hundred pounds.

‘Hi Grandma!’ he said cheerfully, making his way to her side.

Linda stared back at him, confused. ‘Neal! You came… you never come any more.’

Sadly, it wasn't the first time she’d confused Liam for his dad. Despite the obvious age difference and the contrast in their colouring, they had a similar build and they both had those amazing Caffrey dimples — but more importantly they shared the same warm, loving smile and the same attentive regard for her wellbeing. Neal had noticed that she’d referred to Cameron as Liam a few times over the past few months as well. The confusion always seemed worse when she’d just woken up from a nap or when she was more heavily medicated. 

‘Mom! I’m over here’ Neal said as she stared back, her eyes lifeless. ‘That’s Liam.’

‘It’s me Grandma’ Liam said as he sat on the edge of the bed and took her hand in his.

‘Of course it is sweetheart’ she said, trying to cover up for her momentary confusio. ‘Where’s that handsome boyfriend of yours?’

Liam exchanged a worried glance with his dad but didn't hesitate before answering. ‘Cody’s got a class today’ he offered, a response that seemed to satisfy her.

Jimbo gave Liam one more flirty smile and turned to speak to Neal. ‘Can I count on you to try to get her to have a few more bites? We’ve got chocolate pudding if you’re a good girl, Mrs. Bennett’ he called out in her direction before disappearing down the hall.

She smiled back, a weak smile. Apparently, chocolate pudding didn't have the same appeal it might have once had.

‘So, what’s on the menu tonight?’ Neal asked.

He got closer, placing a kiss on the top of his mom’s head and peeking at her dinner tray. ‘That looks like asparagus soup’ he said with forced enthusiasm.

Linda gave a dismissive wave of her hand, showing her disinterest in what was on offer.

‘Come on, Mom’ Neal coaxed. ‘Liam came all the way from Syracuse to visit. Why don’t you show him you can finish your soup.’

Whether she was confused or just wanted an excuse not to eat was unclear. ‘What are you doing up in Syracuse sweetheart?’ she asked her grandson.

Liam’s eyes narrowed in worry. ‘Grandma, remember? I’m going to school…’ he stopped suddenly, checking out the naughty smile on her face. ‘You just don’t want to finish your soup, do you?’

Linda smiled back and spoke, her voice weak. ‘It was worth a try.’

WCWCWC

Caitlin turned to find the face of her older brother - a face she hadn't expected to see for a long, long time. If ever. He’d been leaving messages, sending texts for weeks now, on the pretext that he wanted to make amends for what had happened. It had been easy for Caitlin to keep him at bay; she was still stinging from the things he'd done and the plans he’d had for implicating her in his petty little schemes.

‘Jess!’ she called out angrily. ‘What the hell are you doing here?’

He didn't wait for an invitation and he pulled up a chair, settling in between his mother and his sister. It was obvious by the smug look on his face that she’d been set up — both by him and their mother.

‘Isn’t this nice, honey?’ Jackie said, resting her hand on Caitlin’s and Jesse’s. ‘All of us together.’

Caitlin stared back in disbelief, anger flaring her nostrils. She was instantly on her feet.

‘No, Mom!’ she shouted, her voice resonating in the small café. ‘It is not nice. I told you I didn't want to see him again and you went behind my back.’

‘Aww come on, kiddo’ Jesse Davis said with his conman smile. ‘We’re family. We can work this out.’

Caitlin stood, towering over him, her eyes shining with fury. 

‘We are NOT a family! Stop saying that!’ she yelled at her brother.

She turned to face her mom. ‘How could you do this to me?’ she spat out, staring her down.

‘I hate you! I hate both of you!’

And with that, Caitlin ripped off her apron and threw it down on the table with a flourish before making a dramatic exit out onto the busy sidewalk.

WCWCWC

‘So, you had a good time, then?’ Sara asked as she and Hope sat in front of empty plates at the Caffrey kitchen table. The leftover feast of the Chinese food they’d ordered sat between them, overflowing in its containers, awaiting the return of the Caffrey men to finish it off. 

‘Mom, it’s so different living in the country. There are cows and horses and chickens and… so much space. And the Armstrongs are really, really nice people.’

‘I don’t doubt it. All you have to do is look at Cam to know he comes from a really wonderful family.’

‘Mr. Armstrong and Becky, she’s the next oldest after Cameron, they run the farm. They’re out at four thirty every morning milking the cows and feeding the chickens.’

‘Four thirty, huh?’ Sara replied with an eyebrow wag. ‘Wow! And here I thought making it to my desk by eight o’clock was a feat.’

‘I know. And Mr. Armstrong has been doing it for like fifty years. He used to help his dad when he was a kid. Becky is terrific and the younger girls, Rhonda and Lucy, they’re like polar opposites. I shared a room with Lucy, she’s the one I went horseback riding with. Mom, she’s a really good little artist, better than most of the students in my classes. Cam and I want to invite both of them to visit this summer, we’ll take them to some galleries and maybe a couple of shows.’

‘This summer…’ Sara murmured, growing thoughtful. ‘You’ll be a married woman by then.’

Hope’s eyes grew bright and she smiled. ‘So, was Daddy upset that we told you guys our plans over the phone.’

‘No, no. Of course not. Daddy and I never had to deal with in-laws all that much, except for June and Linda but I know it can’t be easy when you’re torn between two sets of parents.’

She reached out for Hope’s hand and squeezed. ‘It’s fine. I’m just really excited for you.’

Hope’s face grew tense. ‘Auntie Elizabeth popped by the gallery earlier to drop off a few things.’

Sara looked at her daughter with empathy and chuckled. ‘You’re kidding! She didn't waste any time.’

‘Mom, I don’t know what to do. She seems to have some pretty grandiose ideas about this wedding.’

‘The first thing you have to do is decide if you want her help. I’ll be the first to admit Elizabeth can be a little pushy at times…’

‘A little pushy?’ Hope replied with a grin. ‘Mom, I know her better than anyone and I know she’s an amazing event planner. I just… don’t want our wedding to turn into a circus.’

Sara nodded; she knew all too well how overbearing her best friend could be when given free rein. And yet, Elizabeth Burke’s heart was always in the right place and she would do anything for those she loved.

‘You know, she was a great help planning our wedding when your dad and I got married but she does tend to get carried away. If you tell her exactly what it is you want, she’ll be a godsend, believe me.’

‘That’s just it. We’re not really sure what it is we want… it’s more a case of knowing what it is we don’t want. Like I don’t want a big pouffy princess dress or tons of makeup or my hair up in some weird style I would never normally wear… and we don’t want three hundred people there and…’

She stopped, feeling somewhat overwhelmed. ‘She left a whole bunch of stuff: books, magazines, catalogues. She even left some samples of hairstyle books. Mom, it’s all too much.’

‘Have you and Cameron discussed what it is you want?’

‘Yeah, we’d love a simple wedding. We’ve already booked the church and I was wondering if you’d help me find a nice place for the reception, something small, maybe out in the country or at a small restaurant.’

‘Of course, honey’ Sara replied. ‘You just need to figure out what it is you and Cam want so you don't get caught up in all the craziness.’

She could see by the look on her daughter’s face that she was feeling totally overwhelmed by the situation. ‘Hope, this is going to be your day, yours and Cam’s and you need to speak up and let your aunt Elizabeth know what it is you want.’

Hope got to her feet and moved to the chair next to her mom. She laced her arm in her mother’s and set her head on her shoulder, letting out a soft sigh. 

Sara patted her arm lovingly. ‘Sweetie, you get to make all the decisions. Don’t let me or your dad or your aunt Elizabeth tell you what to do. Okay?’

Hope felt a smile creeping onto her face. ‘Okay.’

‘And whatever it is you decide, it will be wonderful and you’ll remember it for the rest of your life.’

‘Do you remember your wedding day?’

Sara chuckled. ‘Of course I do’ she said giving her a playful nudge. ‘I’m not that ancient!’

She let her mind wander back to that summer day at June’s elegant home. Years later, so many details escaped her memory but she would always recall the look on Neal’s face as she took those few tentative steps towards him as he waited for her at the door to the garden, the sound of Hope cooing in June’s arms, the smell of fresh flowers, the beautiful orchid on Neal’s lapel.

‘It was perfect. Small, just a few of us and of course you were there, looking so cute in your little dress and headband. Aunt Elizabeth had tucked an orchid in your thick curly hair.’

Hope smiled and squeezed her mom’s arm; she’d seen the photographs many times over the years. 

‘Daddy surprised me with a honeymoon trip to Maine. He was still working for the FBI and Uncle Peter arranged to let him off his anklet for a couple of days. It was amazing.’

‘You left me at home?’ 

‘Yes, all alone with a bowl of water’ Sara teased. ‘What is with you anyway, clinging to me like a three year old?’

Hope pulled away and shrugged and Sara seemed to put two and two together. She ran her hand through her daughter’s wavy head of hair. ‘Does this have anything to do with your surgery next week?’

‘No… well, maybe a little. I know I’ve been through a lot worse that a stupid eyelid tuck but the truth is I’ve just had it with all these surgeries.’

Sara brushed her lips against her daughter’s eyelids. ‘You know you don’t have to do it if you don’t want to. I think you’re perfect the way you are.’

‘Thanks Mom…but I want to. It’s the last one. It’s just that I’m kind of over it, you know. I think I’ve lost count of how many operations I’ve had over the past three years.’

‘Seven’ Sara said without hesitation as they both smiled. ‘At least you don’t have to have general anaesthetic this time. I know how much you hate that.’

Hope got to her feet and began collecting their dirty plates. ‘You’re right. I’m being silly.’

Sara’s hand was instantly on her arm, holding her back. ‘When did you hear me say you were silly. You’re not silly. I’m just trying to remind you that you’ve come so far and it’s finally going to be over.’

Hope shrugged. ‘Except for speech therapy’ she said with a sigh.

‘You can stop those visits too, if you want’ Sara reminded her. 

‘Sorry, I don’t know what’s gotten into me. I guess I’m just tired’ Hope said, shaking off the melancholy. ‘So, what’s taking Dad and Liam so long anyway.’

‘Liam?’

‘Oops, there goes that surprise.’

‘Your dad didn't tell me Liam was coming home with him.’

‘He wanted to surprise you. They both did’ Hope confided. ‘I only just found out about it when Dad texted me this afternoon.’

Sara looked mighty pleased at the news. ‘Don’t worry… I can act surprised.’

There was movement under the table, Raffie waking to the sound of someone at the door and the dog was instantly on his feet, lumbering towards the front door to greet the newcomer. Sara and Hope followed. 

Finally, the guys were home.

The door slammed before they could actually reach it and there stood Caitlin with nothing but a sweater on despite the cold winter evening.

‘What’s wrong? What’s happened?’ Sara asked upon seeing the distraught look on her face. ‘Is it Linda?’

‘No!’ Caitlin shouted back, without even bothering to slow down. 

She was halfway up the stairs when she yelled back. ‘I hate my stupid mother!’

Sara and Hope stood there with Raffie panting between them, staring with their mouths hanging open as the young woman stomped all the way up the stairs.

TBC


	42. Chapter 42

By the time most of the kung pao chicken, sweet and sour shrimp and pork dumplings had been ingested, things had grown quiet once more in the little house on Meadowbrook Street. Caitlin had barricaded herself up in her room, refusing to come out. It was anyone’s guess what had transpired to put her in such a state - except that from her earlier rants, it appeared Caitlin’s outrage had something to do with Jackie Somersby.

Caitlin had been excited to tell Sara about the impending meeting with her mother. The fact that Jackie had been sober when she’d called had been an encouraging sign; Caitlin had even commented that she thought the woman might actually be turning a corner. Even though their mother/daughter relationship would never be perfect, perhaps they could find a way to save what was left of its frayed remnants. Obviously, something had transpired in the last twenty-four hours to shatter Caitlin’s illusions.

Unfortunately, this wasn't the first time Jackie Somersby had proven to be a disappointment to her daughter. Caitlin had had her heart broken on more occasions than she could recall, going back to the age of five when she was ripped from her drugged up mother’s arms by the authorities and placed in her very first foster home. As a young kid, Caitlin recalled supervised visits where her mom would bring her candy or a ‘Golden Book’ from the dollar store. They would spend a precious hour under the watchful eye of the staff from Children’s Services. When the visit ended, Caitlin would be even sadder than before, not understanding why she couldn't go home and be with her mother and brother. 

Over time, the visits had grown fewer and farther between as Jackie went from one bender to another, sometimes landing herself in rehab or, worse yet, in jail for petty crimes such as theft, solicitation or disorderly conduct. On one memorable occasion, Jackie got eighteen months for smacking a police officer upside the head - her crowning glory.

Afterwards, she would reappear, begging for forgiveness, promising to do better, eager to reestablish what she described as the sacred relationship between a mother and her kids - an empty sentiment devoid of any significant meaning. 

About a year after Caitlin had moved into the Caffrey home, there’d been a period of about six months, where Jackie had appeared to finally be on the right track. Caitlin had been happy to have her mom back in her life and she’d been hopeful the changes she’d noticed in the woman were permanent and would lead them down the road to a stable, loving relationship. Alas, Jackie had shown up at the Caffrey house one night, stinking drunk, demanding to see Caitlin, accusing Neal and Sara of all sorts and insisting that the Caffreys were standing in the way of their reconciliation. 

On that fateful night, Jackie had actually taken a swing at Sara and Neal had turfed her out on her ass while Caitlin stood by and watched, horrified to see her mother in such a state. For Caitlin’s sake, the Caffreys hadn't pressed charges but it had taken weeks to bring their foster daughter back from the brink and by the time things had finally settled down, Jackie had reappeared, eager to make amends.

Since then, Caitlin had been careful not to fall for her mom’s empty promises. She refused to meet with her if she’d been drinking and, on a couple of occasions, she’d actually walked away when her mom had shown up drunk or high. 

This time, as with every other time, Caitlin had been praying for a miracle. With every incident, her faith in her mom grew dimmer but despite her distrust, Caitlin still held out a shred of hope for a happy ending. 

‘Well, we can’t leave her like that’ Neal said, glancing toward the staircase.

‘So what did she say, exactly?’ Liam asked, dipping his spring roll in extra spicy sauce - how he could eat that stuff without destroying the inner lining of his stomach was a mystery to Neal.

‘She just kept saying how much she hated her mom’ Sara replied.

She turned to face Neal. ‘Honey, I don't want her falling off the deep end again. We just finally got her settled after that fiasco over the holidays.’

Neal nodded. ‘Do you think Jackie had been drinking? Is that what happened?’ 

‘I don’t know, I have no idea. All I know is that they'd planned to meet at the coffee shop during her dinner break.’

Sara followed Neal’s gaze towards the stairs. ‘Do you want to try again?’

They had taken turns going upstairs and standing outside their foster daughter’s bedroom door, trying to coax her into letting them in or at least telling them what had happened. But all they got in response was sobbing, Caitlin’s breathing laboured as she pleaded with them to leave her alone. 

‘I could try if you want’ Liam offered, his mouth full. ‘Maybe I could bring her up some food.’

‘It’s worth a try, I suppose’ Sara said, getting up to grab a plate from the cupboard.

She began to assemble an assortment of leftovers onto the plate careful to add an extra heaping spoonful of the shrimp fried rice she knew Caitlin liked. She walked over to the fridge and pulled out a can of pop and laid it beside the plate on a tray.

Liam wiped his mouth and wagged his eyebrows at his folks. ‘Wish me luck.’

He picked up the tray and headed towards the stairs with Raffie nipping at his heels. 

‘Come on buddy’ he called out. ‘Let’s go see what we can do.’

WCWCWC

Caitlin stared up at the ceiling, the sobbing momentarily subsiding. How could she be so stupid as to believe anything that came out of her mother’s mouth? She was a fraud, a swindler, just like Jesse. Whenever it was convenient, Jackie would play the ‘happy families’ card but it never went beyond words or wishful thinking. It was all just empty rhetoric, pretty words about how families needed to stick together through thick and thin.

What a joke! Jackie Somersby only ever thought about one person and that was herself. 

The Caffreys, on the other hand, didn't spout off gratuitously about family unity but when it came to having each other’s backs, to standing up for what was right, well, actions spoke louder than words. In her almost five years living in their home, she’d been witness to countless occasions when the members of the tight family unit had stood up for one another. 

And for her.

When Children’s Services had agreed to this placement, her social worker, Miranda Cross, had made it clear that if she stepped out of line even just once, she would be shipped up north to a group home. So many times, she’d been deserving of a good swift kick in the ass for not sticking to the agreed upon rules. Although she’d drawn the line at doing anything that might directly hurt her foster parents or siblings, everything else had been fair game in Caitlin’s book: sneaking out past curfew on week nights, drinking, doing drugs, shoplifting, hanging out with the bad kids from school. 

But despite her constant acting out, Sara and Neal had continued to give her the benefit of the doubt, convinced that, with a little patience and kindness, she would someday straighten herself out. Even Liam’s little diatribe in the garage when he’d found her cleaning the car a couple of months back had been a testament to the fact she was a full fledged member of the Caffrey family. He’d cared enough not to sugar coat things, to share his honest feelings with her, to call her on her crap, to stand up for his dad. 

That in and of itself was a sign that she belonged. 

And yet, there was a phrase that kept playing in her head: biology is destiny. How many times had that notion been debated throughout the ages. The nature versus nurture debate continued to rage on in the world of psychology. Arguments could be made on both sides of the argument although more recent studies had begun to tip the balance in favour of environment as the most critical element in moulding personality and future behaviour. 

Truth was, Caitlin didn't want to be like her mom. Or her brother. She aspired to living up to the standards she’d seen play out in the Caffrey home since she’d been privileged enough to share their lives. She admired Neal’s kindness and generosity, Sara’s warmth and sense of humour, Hope’s strength and self-confidence, Liam’s compassion and thoughtfulness. Those were the models she aspired to — even though she believed she fell short on all counts.

And yet, sharing her day to day life with her foster family, she had learned that they all had their challenges, their frailties, their weaknesses and that when one member of the family fell short or stumbled, the others rushed in to pick up the pieces.

Hope had been an exemplary model of strength and courage following the devastating accident she’d suffered. So many would have given up, unable to get back on their feet. But Hope had been determined to come back even when life continued to throw her one curve ball after another, forcing her to dig deep to get back what she’d lost.

Liam, in his own quiet way, had also faced adversity in his young life. Being a gay man in a straight world meant you had to swim against the current, stand up to prejudice and intolerance and Liam had stood strong, facing the challenges with integrity and determination — and with the humility that was his trademark. 

Sara had also overcome so much, beginning with the life-threatening disease she’d battled when Hope had been just a toddler. She’d fought back, intent on being an example of endurance and fortitude for her little girl. Years later, she would be put to the test once again when she was sexually assaulted and left for dead. The road back from the unspeakable trauma she’d endured had been painfully slow and arduous but her foster mom had never given up, reaching out to get the help she needed in order to return to her family. Sara wore those scars - both physical and emotional - with a badge of honour and Caitlin aspired to doing the same.

Even Neal who, in Caitlin’s eyes, had a giant ’S’ emblazoned on his chest, had faced his share of heartbreak and hardship in his life. He’d stood between a loaded gun and his beloved daughter one night at the Raphael, years before Caitlin had ever even laid eyes on him. He’d taken a bullet for his little girl that night and had ended up fighting for his life. Caitlin knew, without the shadow of a doubt, that Neal would do the same for her without hesitation. That’s just who Neal Caffrey was. 

More recently, she’d witnessed first hand the pain and suffering of a loving dad watching his little girl suffer in the aftermath of the horrific accident that had left Hope broken in a million pieces. But even someone as strong as Neal Caffrey had been unable to bear the guilt that had ensued and he’d faltered, falling into the abyss of alcohol abuse. Unlike her mother though, he had found a way to come back, inspired by his unfailing love for his family. He had taught her that with love and courage, there was grace in failure, dignity in surrender and pride in overcoming hardship. 

And finally, there was Linda Bennett. The relationship between the eighty-four year old woman and the rebellious teen had sprouted right out of left field and neither woman had seen it coming. Caitlin had reluctantly tagged along on the family’s trip to St. Louis when Neal had introduced his kids to his mom. She had just recently joined the family and it had been her first glimpse at the inner workings of the complicated history and dynamics of the Caffrey family. She remembered asking Liam on the plane why Neal was a ‘Caffrey’ and his mother a ‘Bennett’ and why Liam’s godmother was a woman by the name of June Ellington. Liam had just rolled his eyes and told her it was complicated — an understatement to say the least.

Up until the confessions of the last few weeks, Caitlin had never fully understood the rift between her foster dad and his mother. Linda had made no bones about the mistakes she’d made in her life, especially as they concerned her relationship with her son. She lived with a deep regret for the years of neglect and Caitlin had had a first row seat over the past five years as Neal and his mom inched their way closer and closer to a reconciliation. She had been impressed by Linda’s perseverance, her sense of humour, her grit, her ability to look at the glass as half full after years of wallowing in self-doubt and self-pity. But most importantly, Caitlin had admired the woman’s resilience, her ability to fight her demons and come out on top after years of struggle.

She wanted that for herself and for her mom. But it seemed like an impossible standard and comparing her relationship with her mom to the relationship between Neal and Linda could only lead to heartbreak. Let’s face it, Jackie Somersby was no Linda Bennett and even though her grandmother had urged patience and love as the path to an eventual reconciliation, Caitlin was becoming increasingly skeptical that such a rapprochement would ever take place.

Linda, Neal, Sara, Liam, Hope… those were Caitlin’s role models. Not Jackie Somersby and Jesse Davis. She was determined not to repeat the past just because of who she’d been born to. And she sure as hell didn't need to keep nurturing those toxic relationships in her life.

‘Caitlin?’ she heard the familiar voice say from outside her bedroom door.

‘I brought you some food. I’ll be honest though, these dumplings are calling out my name and I know they’re your favourites but…’

She was instantly on her feet, wiping her eyes.

The door flew open and she saw Liam standing there, holding a tray of food with a playful grin on his face and Raffie panting at his feet.

‘Liam!’ she called out, momentarily forgetting her woes. ‘What are you doing here?’

‘I heard you were badly in need of dumplings, so I flew in from Syracuse.’

She smiled through the tears still stinging her eyes and threw her arms around his neck, momentarily destabilizing him.

‘Whoa, whoa! Can I come in? ‘Cause I wasn't kidding about these dumplings.’

She stepped aside, letting him in and Liam placed the tray of food on her bed and watched her check out what was on display. If the past was any indication, food was the way to go with his foster sister.

He took the chair by the bed and watched as she grabbed for a spring roll, searching the tray. 

‘Did you bring the hot sauce?’ she asked.

WCWCWC

Neal and Sara stood at the bottom of the staircase, ears perked up as they eavesdropped on the goings-on up on the second floor. They’d heard Liam’s soft voice followed by the sound of the bedroom door opening and Raffie whimpering.

‘I think he’s in’ Sara whispered.

Neal frowned as he leaned in to listen. 

‘Well, what do you know?’ he murmured under his breath. ‘I guess we should have led with the dumplings.’

WCWCWC

Over in Brooklyn, Peter and Elizabeth Burke were finishing off a meal of their own. 

‘Is it just me or did Hope look a little shell shocked when I walked into the gallery this afternoon?’ Elizabeth asked her husband.

Peter stared down at his dinner, picking at the broccoli and setting it aside in favour of a mouthful of potato salad. ‘What do you mean, shell shocked?’

‘I don’t know. It’s just… a feeling.’

Worry lines appeared on her forehead. ‘You don’t think she’s hired another event planner for her wedding do you?’

Peter looked up at her. ‘I don’t know hon. Maybe you should ask her.’

‘But, why would she do that?’

‘Honey, I’m not saying she did but it wouldn’t do any harm for you to check with her and see if she’d like you to do it instead of… assuming one way or the other.’

Peter Burke knew there were only certain ways he could get through to his wife. Any direct confrontation would only bring about a ‘discussion’ - and Peter hated discussions. He liked his life, quiet and serene with the least possible bumps along the way.

‘I suppose. Do you think it was just too much information to dump on her all at once?’

Peter decided it was time to take a page from Neal Caffrey’s playbook - answering a question with a question.

‘What do you think?’ he asked.

‘I… maybe I came on a bit too strong. Sara did say Hope wasn't the type to want a lot of froufrou.’

‘You needed Sara to tell you that?’ Peter asked. ‘Honey, you’ve known Hope her whole life.’

Elizabeth frowned. ‘I guess… It’s true, Hope has simple tastes. And Cameron’s family lives in the country, not exactly big city people.’

Peter listened and tried to react as little as possible. He played with his food while Elizabeth continued with her soliloquy.

‘Maybe a country theme, you know, vintage dress, garden ceremony.’

‘I thought Neal said they were having a church wedding.’

‘Sara didn’t tell me that!’

Elizabeth looked miffed. She got up to start clearing the table. When she returned, she had the phone in her hand, ready to call her best friend over in White Plains.

‘How come the wedding planner is always the last to know?’ she murmured under her breath.

WCWCWC

Caitlin was halfway through destroying what was on her plate before she spoke again. Liam sat there, watching the enigma that was Caitlin Somersby. Having her in the house had been a thorn in his side almost since the first day she’d walked in.

Even though their parents had sought his and Hope’s assent before committing to inviting her into their home, he had underestimated to what extent this relatively small person with the big personality would cause turmoil in their home life. Caitlin was almost a year his senior but in some ways, she was happy to play the role of little sister. In school, she had tried everything to be included in his circle of friends. After his dad had asked for his cooperation, Liam had relinquished, inviting her along when he went out with his group of friends and making sure she was doing all right in her new high school.

After a while, he’d grown increasingly frustrated. Whereas he and his sister had always endeavoured to follow the rules - the important ones at least - Caitlin would look for ways to bend and break them at every turn. And although there had been the odd consequence for her actions, his mom and dad always seemed to give her a pass.

But he wasn't a kid anymore and he understood that Caitlin hadn't had many breaks in her life - which explained the acting out. What he couldn't understand was why she wasn't more grateful for the opportunities she’d been given and why his parents put up with her crap again and again.

Their infamous face-off in the garage had come after a buildup of years of resentment and had been a direct consequence of his concern for his dad’s wellbeing. Watching his father spiral out of control following Hope’s accident had thrown him for a loop, exposing his dad as an ordinary man, imperfections and all. In all the ways that really mattered, Neal Caffrey was a model dad: loving, kind, fair-minded and supportive of his kids. When the roof had finally caved in, there had been an awful lot of collateral damage and Liam still lived with the fear that someday, he might once again lose his loving dad to a bottle of Jack Daniels. He’d seen his mom struggle with a husband who’d gone from being a responsible and loving partner and father to a self loathing and guilt ridden man, a shadow of his former self.

The thought that Caitlin’s meltdowns might bring his dad to the brink once again had been more than Liam could handle. He’d seen his dad’s reaction the night they’d gone out looking for Caitlin, finding her passed out on somebody’s couch. Neal wasn't infallible or unbreakable as Liam knew all too well and he feared that he might succumb to his inner demons if things got too intense. 

But regardless of his fears, Liam was the first to admit that he’d gone way over the line in confronting Caitlin that day. With a little perspective, he now realized what he was really afraid of: losing the dad he loved, admired and respected.

‘Good?’ he asked as Caitlin finally slowed down and looked up at him.

She nodded, her mouth still full. ‘I guess I was hungry… and I’ve got a splitting headache.’

‘Crying will do that to you. I can get you some Advil’ Liam offered as Caitlin put her hand out to stop him.

‘I’ll get it… in a minute.’

Liam nodded; it looked like she was finally ready to spill the beans. ‘So, do you want to tell me what the hell’s going on.’

Caitlin picked up her phone and glanced down at it. There were several texts and voice messages from her mom and from Jesse but more importantly, there was a short text from Crazy Josie.

‘I just got fired’ she said, her voice flat.

‘Fired? From your job at the day care?’

‘No, no. The café. I was meeting my mom for coffee and… well, she invited Jesse along even though she knows I don’t want to have anything to do with him. I flipped out and I… I stormed out of there.’

She sighed. ‘I even left my coat behind’ she said with a pout.

‘You came home in this weather without a coat?’ 

‘Yeah’

‘You’re crazy.’

Caitlin began to cry again, tears running down her face. ‘It’s not fair’ she declared like a petulant child. ‘Why does my mom have to be such a… dolt? And why do I care so much?’

Liam chuckled at the sudden change of mood; Caitlin was a natural for drama school.

‘Because she’s your mom and you don’t want to give up on her.’

‘But it hurts’ she moaned.

Liam sighed and gave her an encouraging smile.

‘Look, I can’t pretend I understand what you’re going through… exactly. I know how lucky I am to have such amazing parents but they’re there for you too, Caitlin. They’ve never given up on you. Why don’t you come down and talk to them, see how you can work this out? They’re worried about you.’

He glanced over his shoulder towards the open door to the bedroom as if to make sure they weren’t lurking around the corner, listening. ‘You know, I wouldn't want to give them a swelled head but they do give pretty good advice.’

The tears were still flowing but Caitlin managed a smile.

Raffie had made his way over to lie next to her on the bed, his face dangerously close to the few morsels of food left on her plate. She inched the plate closer to him and let him go to town on the last of the chicken and the rice.

Liam got to his feet. ‘So, what do you say? You want to come downstairs? There are a few fortune cookies left. You can pick through them until you find one you like.’

She chuckled and stood to join him, reaching for the tray.

A few feet away, at the top of the stairs, Neal and Sara scrambled to get their feet. They’d been sitting on the top step, eavesdropping on the whole conversation. They moved like lightning, fearful they might get caught.

By the time Liam and Caitlin appeared, they were sitting at the kitchen table, looking as innocent as lambs.

TBC


	43. Chapter 43

The last time Liam had been to the Blue Moon Café was with his boyfriend, Cody Miller. Well, actually, he couldn't remember ever being inside the Blue Moon Café without Cody Miller. During their last two years of high school, it had become their refuge, their go-to place when they wanted a good cup of joe and some time alone or in the company of good friends.

Coming out during his high school years had been quite the adventure for young Liam Caffrey. To say he’d been a late bloomer was somewhat of an understatement. It had taken him a while to figure out why his heart didn't go pitter-patter when the groupies from the high school’s basketball team hung around the gym after games, batting their eyelashes at the team’s players. What did however rock his boat was that cute guy with the dark hair he’d noticed in his biology class. It wasn’t the first time Liam had noticed he got butterflies in his stomach around certain young men but it had been the first time he’d stopped to truly question what it all meant - and why, suddenly, he wanted to do something about it.

By the time Liam had finally put the pieces of the puzzle together and figured out exactly what was going on, he’d found himself confiding about his evolving feelings to his uncle Mozzie who had encouraged him to talk to his parents. Actually following through and coming out to the two of them had taken a little longer. Not because Liam feared judgement or disappointment, just because when he finally said the words out loud, he knew there would be no turning back and that his life would be changing in so many ways. 

Once he’d come out, he’d been disappointed to find that it wasn’t all smooth sailing. Not everyone was as open and supportive as his immediate family members and close friends. There were the occasional nasty barbs from classmates and Liam was grateful for the support of his best buddy and fellow basketball player, Will Allenby, whose comment upon finding out about Liam’s sexual orientation had been something along the lines of ‘It’s about time you said something.’ 

Being a respected athlete had insulated Liam from some of the more hateful rhetoric but he and Cody had still been forced to face a number of ugly incidents throughout their years at White Plains High, including a particularly nasty episode where Cody had been seriously hurt and had ended up in hospital.

Unlike Liam, Cody Miller had always been an outspoken young man, an activist - even in grade school, he’d defended his right to wear what he wanted, to listen to the music he liked and to openly fawn over whoever he fancied. By the time he’d hit high school, he was out and proud and ready to rumble. When he’d found out that White Plains High hadn’t yet organized a chapter of the Gay Straight Alliance, it took him about a minute and a half to start working on just such an ambitious project.

Will Allenby and his then girlfriend Josie had been one of the first recruits. Cody had met Will through one of his classes and the young man and his paramour had been more than happy to join the group as part of the ‘straight’ contingent of the equation. Will, who was no slouch and had figured out Liam’s secret a long time ago, had dragged his best friend to his very first meeting of the GSA on a rainy Wednesday afternoon after school. When Liam had recognized the cute boy from his biology class, his heart had leapt out of his chest, his eyes had popped out of his head and he’d started on the slow but steady road to admitting, and finally celebrating, his homosexuality.

As far as first boyfriends went, it was hard to beat a guy like Cody Miller. He was sweet, kind, patient and supportive and he had the most incredible hazel eyes Liam had ever seen. But more importantly, he was respectful of Liam’s less than flamboyant personality and his desire to live his gay life in his own quiet way. It had taken some time but they’d eventually come to terms with the fact that they were on opposite ends of the spectrum: Cody, outgoing and passionate, Liam, introverted and discreet. That didn't keep them from gradually growing into their relationship, complete in every way - including sexually. They had taken that journey of discovery together, exploring the joys of carnal pursuits while their friends and family members watched their relationship blossom from the sidelines.

Through trial and error, Liam had learned that there was a time and a place to be open about his sexuality and there were moments when self-preservation dictated a more discreet approach. Luckily, the Blue Moon had been a safe place for him and Cody. They spent hours in the café, doing homework, hanging out with friends and sipping run of the mill coffee. It was a safe zone where the two young lovers could be themselves without judgement or ridicule. Although they were wary of engaging in over the top public displays of affection, within the safety of the café, they allowed themselves the occasional loving touch and the odd peck on the cheek. 

All in all, the place felt warm and safe and as Liam stepped into the café on this Friday evening just before closing time, he felt his chest puff up at the happy memories as a smile came to his lips. 

‘Sorry, we’re closing in five minutes’ came Crazy Josie’s voice from behind the counter.

Her back was turned to the door and Liam called out, waiting for a reaction. ‘I hear this place has amazing pecan brownies.’ 

She turned to face him and a bright smile lit up her old weathered face.

‘Liam Caffrey! As I live and breathe!’ the woman called out, shuffling to meet him halfway.

‘Hey Josie!’ he replied, giving her a warm welcoming hug. 

‘What the hell are you doing here? And at this late hour.’

‘Like I said’ he repeated, glancing at the small display case and spotting a few remaining sweets. ‘I came for the brownies.’

Josie’s eyes sparkled and she grabbed for a couple of mugs.

‘Well, you’re just in time. I was about to dump the last of the decaf.’

‘Lucky me!’ Liam replied, pulling up a chair.

WCWCWC

Once settled at the kitchen table between Neal and Sara, it was as if a water main had broken. Caitlin began telling the detailed story of how she and her mom had been having a perfectly pleasant conversation when Jesse had shown up unexpectedly - well, not so unexpectedly as far as her mother was concerned.

‘She had it all planned’ she complained. ‘She’s always trying to project this image of us as a happy family.’

Neal and Sara looked at each other with concern. 

‘What happened? What did she do?’ Sara asked.

‘She tricked me, that’s what she did. Acting like she just wanted to meet up for coffee when all along, she was going behind my back, plotting with Jesse.’

Neal felt his fist tighten by his side at the mention of the young man’s name. ‘So Jesse was there?’

Caitlin nodded and sniffled.

‘What did he want?’

She whimpered. ‘He acted like nothing had happened. Like he hadn't come into this house with the intention of robbing us blind. Like I would just forget all the awful things he’d said to you.’

Sara took her foster daughter’s hand in hers. ‘So, what did you do?’

‘I threw my apron down on the table and I ran out of there as fast as I could’ she said looking up at Sara with tears in her eyes. 

She waited a beat before continuing. ‘And now, I’ve lost my job.’

‘Oh, honey…’ Sara said. ‘You’ve always known your mom is messed up. She’s had a rough life and she probably sees happy families around her and wishes her life could be like that too.’

‘Well, it isn’t. Our family is… it’s not even a family! It’s a fucked up mess. And so am I!’

‘You are not a…’ Neal hesitated before continuing ‘… a fucked up mess Caitlin. You’re a smart, funny, talented young woman who can do anything she wants with her life.’

Caitlin looked from Neal back to Sara and blew her nose loudly. ‘Why is my mom a drunk and an idiot? Look at Grandma, she managed to straighten herself out. Why can’t Jackie be more like her?’

Neal let out a long painful sigh. ‘Caitlin, Grandma wasn't always what you see today. She was messed up for a long, long time before she managed to straighten herself out. And besides, you can’t compare people or what they’re going through. Everybody is different.’

He hesitated before continuing. It seemed he was always walking that fine line between telling her the hard, painful truths about his mom and running the risk of denigrating her in Caitlin’s eyes or letting her continue to believe the fantasy that it had always been puppies and rainbows between him and Linda. Which was definitely not the case.

‘Honey, you didn't see all the ugliness between me and my mom when I was growing up. She was… struggling back then and she wasn't in any condition to take care of a kid like me. It wasn’t… it wasn’t like it is now. And it took a long time and a lot of patience and… an awful lot of good will to get us where we are today.’

Sara nodded. ‘Grandma did the best she could back then’ she added in an attempt to soften the blow. ‘You have to believe that Jackie is trying to do the same.’ 

Caitlin looked up at her, eyes overflowing with unshed tears. ‘But I don't want her in my life! I hate her!’

‘That’s your decision to make Caitlin’ Neal reminded her. ‘You always have the option of not seeing her anymore.’

‘Why would she invite Jesse along when she knows full well what he did to me… to us. She knows I don't want to have anything to do with him.’

Neal nodded; he’s had more than his fill of the young man and had no interest in crossing paths with him again. But if Caitlin eventually decided she wanted to reconcile with him, he would have to swallow his pride and find a way to help her through it.

‘I hate them! Both of them!’ Caitlin repeated, shouting loudly.

Once again, the couple exchanged worried looks. It had never been their intention to force a square peg into a round hole but they knew that, sometimes, you had to work an awfully long time on a relationship to get it to work for both parties. Linda and Neal’s relationship was a testament to that very fact. The last thing Neal and Sara wanted was to encourage Caitlin to break her ties with her family only to have her regret her decision somewhere down the line. Burning bridges meant they could never be repaired, at least not easily.  
‘Hate is such a strong word honey’ Neal reminded her.

‘Didn’t you hate grandma when you were young?’

Neal paused for a moment, giving it some thought before answering honestly; he owed her that much. ‘I might have thought it was hate at the time but I guess, in hindsight, it was anger and hurt and sadness and disappointment. I don’t think I ever really hated her.’

Caitlin listened, her eyebrows knitted. 

‘And stepping away from the situation for a while helped me get a better grip on things’ Neal explained. ‘It’s important not to make rash decisions.’

Sara arched her eyebrow in his direction - ‘a while’ she thought as she reflected on the forty plus years Neal and his mom had been apart. He seemed to read her mind and gave her a dismissive look, returning his gaze to his foster daughter. 

‘I was lucky that both Grandma and I wanted to work at finding our way back to each other’ he added, glancing at his wife. ‘If it hadn't been for Sara, I would never have made that first move and Grandma would still be in St. Louis all by herself.’

Caitlin had grown quiet, taking in her foster parents’ words of wisdom.

‘And sometimes it just never works out… and that’s okay, too’ Neal continued. ‘There are certain relationships that are poison and we shouldn't try to hang on to them at all costs.’

‘Have you had relationships like that in your life?’ she asked, turning to look at him.

‘Of course I have’ Neal replied thinking back to his conman days. ‘Lots of them. Everybody does.’

‘Like who?’

Neal hadn’t expected such a pointed question.

‘There were… people in my life when I was younger. They were bad influences on me’ Neal confessed as the image of Matthew Keller flashed in his mind. ‘I would have been better off walking away but in some cases, I… hung on for too long and it ended up getting me into trouble.’

‘Do you think I should cut my mom loose once and for all?’ 

It wasn't the first time the young woman had asked that question, of herself and of her foster parents. Sara felt the need to jump in. As awful as Jackie had been to her daughter, she was hardly a hardened criminals like some of the people Neal was talking about.

‘That’s up to you, sweetie’ she said wistfully. ‘But I understand the urge to want to keep working at it. Jackie’s your mom and you only get one mom.’ 

Neal nodded in agreement. ‘It’s hard to know the right thing to do. You just need to balance it out and try to see if the good in a relationship outweighs the bad.’

Caitlin stared back, her big blue eyes swimming in tears. 

‘And you’re the only one who knows what’s best for you’ he added.

WCWCWC

Crazy Josie glanced over Liam’s shoulder in the direction of the door to the café and grinned. ‘I keep thinking Cody’s coming in right behind you.’

Liam smiled sadly. ‘I guess you heard. About our breakup.’

She nodded. ‘Hey, I get it. Relationships are tough at the best of times, let alone when people are in two different cities.’

‘You know, he still comes in here a lot’ she added, pointing to a table nearby. ‘Still sits at the same table you guys used to share.’

Liam glanced in that direction, sadness filling his heart. ‘Oh yeah?’

‘He comes in between his university classes. Still orders latte and a gingersnap cookie. Sometimes, he has friends with him, sometimes he’s alone. I always get the feeling when he comes in alone that he’s… he’s thinking about the good old days.’

Liam nodded and sighed loudly.

‘So, tell me. How’s school? Everybody says you’re a big basketball star, not that I follow that stuff very closely. The other day, Cody brought in a copy of the student paper from the University of Syracuse and your picture was on the cover. He looked mighty proud.’

Liam looked at her warily. ‘Josie, you’re not very subtle, you know. Are you sure you don't want to start writing a lonely hearts column in the local paper?’

She shrugged, her old tired face looking sad. ‘Hey, what can I say? I’m the last of the romantics. And I call ‘em like I see ‘em.’

The room grew quiet. ‘What happened to you guys anyway? I always thought yours would be the first gay wedding I’d get invited to. And I had my mind set on catering it’ she added with a girlish giggle.

‘Aww, you know. Life… It’s hard enough to keep a relationship going at the best of times. It’s practically impossible when you’re constantly being torn apart. This way, Cody is free to date, meet other guys.’

‘And what about you? Anybody special in your life?’

‘There was… until lately. But… Cody kind of spoiled me for anyone else, you know. He’s a hard act to follow.’

‘You know people have long-distance relationships all the time’ she said, searching his eyes.

There was silence as Liam reflected. Finally, the old woman spoke up.

‘So, why do I have a feeling you’re not here to talk about your love life?’

‘It’s Caitlin, Josie. She told me about what happened earlier, how you fired her.’

‘Little bugger, she’s so damn impulsive. She stormed out of here right in the middle of her shift and left me scrambling on my own.’

Liam raised his eyebrows in response. ‘I thought you said she was a good match for this place.’

‘She is… she was. The customers love her, she always wears a smile and she can put on a fresh pot of coffee in nine seconds flat — I’ve timed her.’

Liam chuckled at the visual of Caitlin working the coffee maker with efficiency.

‘But I need to be able to count on my staff to be there when they’re supposed to be.’

‘Has she ever done this kind of thing before?’ he asked, taking a sip of coffee.

‘No… well, not exactly. She was a few minutes late a couple of months ago but I yelled at her… scared the living crap out of her and she’s been fine ever since.’

‘You know, Josie, Caitlin’s had a really rough life. Did you know she lived in three different foster homes and had a couple of stints in group homes before she landed at our place.’

Josie leaned in to listen.

‘Her mom’s been in and out of jail since Caitlin was five years old and just when Caitlin thinks they can make a go of things, her mom messes up again. That’s what happened today.’

The old woman remained quiet.

‘She’s… she’s impulsive, I’ll grant you that’ Liam continued. ‘And she can be annoying as all hell and loud and overbearing and…’

He shook his head. If his intention was to try to win Caitlin’s job back, he’d better slow down on the vivid description of her personality.

‘But Josie, deep down, Caitlin has a good heart. She’s kind and caring and she’s a really talented artist. She wants to do the right thing but sometimes she gets a little… sidetracked, that’s all. Look, she could use a bit of a break.’

He looked at the woman, pleading with his eyes.

‘You know, you two are cut from the same cloth: diamonds in the rough, that’s what you both are’ Liam added for good measure laying his hand on top of Josie’s.

‘So what are you saying? Did you come here to beg me to take that little shit back?’

‘That depends. It is working?’

Josie rolled her eyes and let out a snort. ‘Fine. Tell her to come in for her next regular shift.’

Liam smiled broadly.

‘But tell her I’m not putting up with any more of her crap!’ 

Josie took one last sip of coffee and looked up at him. ‘Whatever you do, don’t to telling her I said those nice things about her. Wouldn't want her to get a swelled head.’

Liam winked at the woman and reached for the pecan brownie in front of him.

‘It’ll be out little secret.’

WCWCWC

Climbing up the staircase, Neal could hear the sound of Sara’s soothing voice coming from Caitlin’s room down the hall. For the time being at least, it appeared the crying had subsided. All that was left was a whole lot of sadness, a hole in the young woman’s heart.

He stepped into his and Sara’s room and began unpacking his overnight bag, throwing things into the laundry hamper as he went. He was about to change into some sleep pants when something caught his eye on the armchair by their bed. 

A couple of things, actually.

One was the pair of silk sleep pants he’d purported to be wearing as he talked to Sara from his room at the Best Western the night before. There was exactly zero chances she hadn’t noticed them lying there while he’d been trying to seduce her and bring her to the heights of passion over the phone. 

He chuckled. 

The other thing he noticed was the ratty old housecoat she insisted on wearing when he wasn't around. God, he hated that thing! He was willing to bet the gallery that she’d been wearing it when she’d told him she’d been clad in nothing but a towel. 

So much for the fantasies conjured up during phone sex.

His mind wandered to his last conversation with Mozzie and the mention of a gift Piper had supposedly given to Sara. She hadn't yet mentioned it to him although to be honest, they hadn't had a minute alone since he and Liam had gotten back and had been assaulted by Caitlin’s little meltdown. 

Surely, if there was something worth telling, she would come clean when the time was right; after all, Sara wasn't in the habit of keeping secrets from her husband. Or at least, he didn't think so.

He glanced at Sara’s side of the bed and began poking around her nightstand to see if there was anything of interest — like an expensive piece of jewelry. A file folder laying on top caught his attention and he peeked inside. He immediately recognized the document as the list of items from Piper’s townhouse, perfectly inventoried with date of purchase, description and value. He let his finger slide down the page in search of the Pollock Mozzie claimed to have overheard the man talk about. He was halfway down the second page when he heard the sound of Sara’s voice wishing Caitlin good night. He quickly returned the document to its spot; Sara hated it when he snooped around her work documents. 

‘Hey’ he heard her say from the bedroom door where she stood, looking totally spent from a night full of emotions.

‘Did she finally settle down?’ he asked, pulling back the blankets on the bed as a diversion.

‘Yeah, she’s fine. She’s exhausted.’ Sara replied as she made it all the way into the room and began to undress. ‘And frankly, so am I.’

‘Is Liam back?’ Neal asked.

‘Not yet.’

‘I wonder where he went to in such a hurry’ he pondered.

Sara’s mind appeared to have moved on to something else. ‘Honey, do you think we should be doing more to try and patch things up between Caitlin and her mom?’

Neal pulled his sweater off over his head and lobbed it into the basket from across the room. Two points.

‘What do you mean, more? Caitlin’s got to make her own decisions, babe. If we get too involved, we might influence her.’

‘That’s just it. I… Look, it’s obvious Jackie is envious of the life we have. She can’t offer her daughter the kinds of things we can. That’s got to be eating at her.’

Sara moved to her dresser and pulled out a clean t-shirt and a pair of yoga pants.

‘There’s nothing we can do about that… short of inviting her to come and live with us’ Neal said in jest.

‘Maybe not live with us but…’ Sara mused. ‘…we could invite her and Jesse over for dinner, try to show some good faith.’

‘What!?’ Neal shouted as Sara shushed him. 

‘You want to invite that… gun-toting, slime ball back into our lives?’

‘Neal, he’s Caitlin’s brother’ she said sternly. ‘And need I remind you, you messed up plenty of times when you were Jesse’s age. I don’t recall Peter and Elizabeth banning you from their dining room table.’

Neal shot her a dirty look; her words stinging him somehow. He let himself fall on the edge of the bed and ran his hands through his hair.

‘Can we sleep on it?’ he suggested, eager to avoid any further discussion on the topic - or worse yet, an argument.

Sara slipped into bed and waited for Neal to do the same. She curled up against him, her arm thrown across his bare chest.

‘So…’ Neal began, easing into the subject of interest to him. ‘Are you all done inventorying the stuff at Piper’s townhouse?’

Sara let out a tired sigh as she reached over him for the bedside lamp, plunging them into darkness. ‘Yes, finally. You would not believe the stuff he has in that place.’

Actually, he kind of would, considering he’d just taken a look at the list of items in the file on her bedside table. Furthermore, Mozzie had given him the full rundown of most of the items he’d heard Sara gushing about through his earbuds, complete, in some cases, with photographs.

‘Oh yeah? Like what?’ he asked, feigning ignorance.

‘Just… tons of stuff, you know’ she said, stifling a yawn. 

Neal insisted. ‘Give me a for instance.’

‘Oh, I don’t know… sculptures, paintings, vases, silver, heirloom pieces… jewelry’ she added hesitantly. 

‘What kind of jewelry?’ he asked, prodding her.

If, as Mozzie had intimated, Randall Piper had offered his favourite insurance investigator a piece of jewelry, this would be the perfect segue for her to come clean to her husband.

Instead Sara deflected. ‘You know, stuff… expensive cufflinks, tie clips, some rings…’ 

She stopped suddenly. ‘Are you pumping me for information, Caffrey?’ she asked, poking him in the ribs playfully. ‘Because you know that’s off limits.’

They were used to having that Chinese wall between them when it came to their jobs. In his present work endeavours, Neal didn't have nearly as much information of a confidential nature to deal with. But certainly back when he’d worked cases with the FBI, Sara had been careful about sticking her nose into his affairs. And Sara’s job required that she deal with information of a private nature all the time. They had learned to draw that line between work and family years ago and, except for comments of a more general nature, they had managed to keep most discussions about their professional lives out of the bedroom. 

But that distinction didn't apply to their personal life - especially as it related to the kids or to their relationship. They were both adamant about keeping things honest although it had been a struggle for Neal in their first few years of marriage. Still, there was a solid, sacred trust between them these days, an expectation that anything that impacted their lives or the lives of their children would be discussed freely and openly and that there would be no secrets between them. Surely, something as personal as a gift from a client - and possibly an expensive one at that - fell into that category.

‘No, of course not!’ Neal cried out, with mock exasperation. ‘I was just curious what a guy like that would have in his house, that’s all.’

‘One of his houses’ she reminded him as he scoffed. ‘Next week, we’re attacking his summer residence out in the Hamptons. Apparently, the place is loaded with stuff.’

Neal nodded. In the dark, she wasn't able to see the grimace on his face and he was unable to read the look of discomfort on hers.

‘So, anything interesting happen while I was gone?’

‘No… can’t think of anything. Oh yeah! I almost forgot’ she said as Neal’s ears perked up. 

Here it was, he thought. Finally she was coming clean; Sara couldn't keep something like this from him even if she tried.

‘Poor Chloe has to have her tonsils out.’

‘What?’

He felt his breathing becoming more rapid.

‘Yeah, Lydia says she’s had one too many infections and the doctor suggested they come out.’

‘That’s too bad. Anything else?’

‘What do you mean, anything else?’ she said looking up at his face in the semi-dark room.

‘I don’t know… anything out of the ordinary?’ he asked, giving her one last chance to confess.

Sara squirmed in his arms, growing uneasy. ‘I can’t think of anything’ she said, biting her bottom lip. 

He placed a kiss on her forehead. ‘So, did you enjoy our little phone… conversation last night?’

She chuckled and prepared to mislead her husband for the second time in the past two minutes. 

‘Yeah, it was nice… But I’m looking forward to the real thing. Tomorrow night, remember? You promised.’

Neal sighed and ran his hand down her side languidly. He let his voice drop an octave. ‘I remember.’

‘So where are you taking me for dinner Caffrey? Someplace nice?’

Neal tried to remain focussed on the conversation. He wanted to make their Valentine’s Day celebration special but now he couldn't stop wondering why, if it was all so innocent, she wasn't telling him about the gift Piper had given her.

‘You never mind where I’m taking you. It’s called a surprise for a reason.’

The room grew quiet. ‘You got any surprises planned for me?’ he asked in a last ditch attempt at getting her to speak up.

Sara gave him a loving squeeze. ‘You’ll just have to wait and see.’

TBC


	44. Chapter 44

Come Saturday morning, things were a lot calmer in the Caffrey home. Liam was happy to wake up in his old bed and was looking forward to having a few friends over for a little get-together that night to watch the Rangers tangle with the Ottawa Senators for third place in the Eastern Conference. 

He decided he’d go out later and pick up a few things: beer, munchies. In the meantime, Will had suggested they hang out for the afternoon, maybe shoot some hoops at the local community centre or catch a matinee at the Westchester Mall. Liam had eagerly agreed; frankly, it was nice to get away from all the drama back in Syracuse. 

He was particularly pleased with himself for his late night visit to the Blue Moon Café. He’d enjoyed catching up with Josie and, as an added bonus, he’d gained some insight into what had been happening with Cody. But more importantly, he'd managed to get Caitlin’s job back, a concrete way to make amends for the horrible way he’d treated her a couple of months back. 

Across the hallway, in his parents’ room, Neal woke to the same question he'd gone to sleep with: why was Sara holding out on him? Not in terms of what she’d been doing at Piper’s place - that was her job after all and discretion was par for the course. But in terms of her personal interactions with the man, something she would normally be a lot more forthcoming about especially if, as Mozzie had reported, she’d been offered an expensive piece of jewelry from her newest client.

The other question weighing on his mind was why she would accept such a gift in the first place. Sara was a stickler for following the rules and maintaining a high level of professionalism. She was known at Sterling Bosch as a straight shooter and she always reported the gifts she received from her clients, as per company protocol. Although it wasn’t prohibited to accept tokens of appreciation, any gift of value had to be declared to avoid any perceived conflict of interest. Had Sara disclosed to her superiors that she had accepted an expensive piece of jewelry from one of her high-end clients?

If he was being truly honest with himself, Neal would have to admit that at the root of all his trepidation was good old fashioned, unadulterated jealousy. The green-eyed monster had reared its ugly head, something that had rarely happened during his twenty plus years of marriage to Sara Ellis. After all, Neal and Sara were both confident, self-assured adults and neither one of them had ever given the other a reason to doubt their commitment and devotion. 

Of course, as with any marriage, there’d been the odd flirtations over the years - on both sides. There’d been that horrible episode where Matthew Keller had insinuated himself into the Caffrey marriage by using an old girlfriend of Neal’s to bait him. Sara had been plenty jealous that time — and with good reason. The woman had ended up drugging Neal and dragging him into her hotel room bed, setting Sara up to find them in flagrante delicto. The fact that it had all happened right after Liam’s birth while Sara had been struggling with postpartum depression had only added to the drama. But with time, Neal and Sara had worked through the whole nasty episode and cooler heads had prevailed once the truth had finally been exposed. 

Neal had had his moments as well, notably when Craig Williamson, Sara’s ex from her university days had shown up one day, out of the blue. The man had been deluded about Sara’s feelings for him and had stalked her for weeks before anyone realized that he posed a real danger to Neal and the kids. That ugly episode had ended with Neal at the pointy end of a knife in a dark alley, left to fight for his life. 

Overall though, neither one of them had ever been what one might call the jealous type. Both Neal and Sara were secure when it came to what they brought to their relationship and Neal, in particular, had never shown any doubts when it came to his unique charm and good looks. But even a man like Neal Caffrey had fleeting moments of vulnerability, particularly when he noticed other men eyeing his wife or when she unwittingly unleashed one of those bright, flirtatious smiles of hers on an unsuspecting member of the opposite sex. 

This particular situation, however, continued to gnaw at Neal like no other. For one thing, Randall Piper was not some random guy flirting with his wife but rather a man she’d had an honest to goodness relationship with, albeit years ago. He was good looking, successful, articulate, filthy rich and seemed to be spending an awful lot of time dangling his riches in front of her nose. Then, there was the annoying fact that Sara had hesitated before telling Neal about her previous liaison with Piper; Neal had practically had to worm it out of her after he'd walked in on the two of them at her office. The fact that she was being called upon to spend hours upon hours with the man in his luxurious homes was just the icing on the cake. 

At any other time, Neal might have ridden out the rough patch with mild annoyance - if he hadn't been smack dab in the middle of some middle-age, existential crisis of his own. But that was all going to change tonight, he thought as he turned over in bed to find Sara’s side of the bed cold and empty. Tonight was the night he was going to show her - and himself - that he could rise to the occasion and be the charming, sexy, thoughtful husband he’d always been. He’d treat her to dinner at one of her favourite restaurants and come home and sweep her off her feet.

‘Randall who?’ she’d be asking by the time he was done charming the socks off her with a fabulous meal and a rock-em, sock-em romp in the sheets.

He heard the sound of water running in the bathroom across the hall and his mind began to wander. Things would be a lot easier to deal with if he knew exactly what he was up against. What if Mozzie had exaggerated - not unlikely, considering the man’s propensity for hyperbole. For all he knew, this could all be some silly misunderstanding, compliments of his buddy with the paranoid tendencies. Maybe Piper had given Sara a small gift to thank her for all the time she’d devoted to him, something perfectly appropriate that she’d tucked away and hadn't even given a second thought to. 

He slipped out of bed, cocking his ear to make sure the shower was still running as he made his way to her dresser. Sara was tidy to a fault. Although her makeup table was littered with more stuff than she could use in five lifetimes, there was very little on top of her dresser except for her jewelry box and a couple of family photographs. He picked up a picture of the two of them on their wedding day, Hope snuggled safely in his arms as she slept. He paused for a moment, staring at their happy faces as he prepared to violate his wife’s privacy.

Without hesitation, he opened her jewelry box, poking around the collection of earrings, necklaces, bracelets and rings - mostly costume jewelry except for a few choice pieces he’d given her for birthdays and anniversaries over the years. He recognized each and every piece - after all, Neal Caffrey’s observational skills when it came to items of value was unparalleled. He wistfully ran his finger over the pearl earrings he’d given her on their wedding day and the emerald brooch he’d given her for her last birthday. 

Once satisfied there was nothing unfamiliar in her treasure trove, he moved on to the dresser itself, pulling out her underwear drawer and peeking in at the orderly assortment of bras and underwear. He pillaged through the pile of undergarments, momentarily distracted by a pair of frilly undies he hadn't seen her wear in a while. He brought them up to his face, letting the soft lace tickle his rough cheek and he smiled as he recalled the last time he’d removed them from her pliant body, a particularly passionate encounter during an all too rare weekend getaway.   
He shook his head, snapping out of it, and returned the hot little number to its place under the more sensible underwear, gently moving things around and returning them to their original spot to avoid detection. It didn't take long before he located a velvet box tucked way underneath the stack of thongs Sara kept towards the back of the drawer. The small square box held no distinguishing marks, no brand or store name adorning its lid but he knew immediately from its simple elegance that it contained something that was not your everyday piece of jewelry. He took a deep breath and slowly opened the small red box, peeking inside. 

He gasped.

Staring back at him was what appeared at first glance to be a flawless antique cameo. He flashed back to his in depth knowledge of all things ‘cameo’. His education on the matter had taken place following a rather unfortunate incident shortly after the whole Vincent Adler debacle. He and Kate had been rattled by Adler’s sudden disappearance with their life savings. For a time, Kate had been inconsolable and Neal had been eager to help her forget their reversal of fortunes. She had talked him into a quick smash and grab at the home of one of the contacts she’d made at her new job at a hedge fund company and he and Mozzie had charged in without their usual due diligence. 

To be honest, the heist had been plagued with bad luck from the get go. Besides the fact they’d almost walked straight into the open arms of the boys in blue, Neal had been mortified when the guy he’d secured to fence the item had pointed out that the resin cameo he and Mozzie had removed from the home of the Manhattan socialite was as fake as a three dollar bill. Neal who, although self-taught, considered himself rather knowledgeable about these things had been thoroughly embarrassed and had spent the following weeks studying the history of cameos in order to be better prepared the next time he came across such a miniature work of art.

The next time had turned out to be about five years later in Naples when a beautiful cameo ring had been among the pieces harvested from a heist he and Mozzie carried out at the Naples Art, Antique and Jewelry show. Amongst the loot, they’d managed to get away with a sardonyx shell cameo ring worth more than fifty thousand dollars American — at least that’s what they got for it from the friendly neighbourhood fence they’d surreptitiously met with at Villa Communal. From then on, Neal had been as well versed in recognizing the value of the rare type of jewelry as any expert could possibly be. 

At first glance, the one he presently held in his hand was a doozie. He carefully removed the brooch from its cushion in the velvety box and began his thorough examination. The sardonyx shell had a thick outer wall and the distinctive dark brown background and ivory foreground he had come to know. Neal rushed over to his night stand and grabbed for his reading glasses, placing them on the tip of his nose as he began to inspect what he could already see was a valuable piece of jewelry. He held it up in the early morning light, checking for chips and cracks. It was flawless. The main image was of an angel holding a violin with cherubs and a harpist at her feet. The left facing cameo, although not an indication of authenticity in and of itself, made the item rarer than a right facing one, adding to its monetary worth. 

The intricate details on the faces, particularly the cherubs who were front facing, only added to its value and confirmed its authenticity. Upon scrutiny, Neal could see that the main figure and the harpist had straight noses, something he immediately recognized as a feature of the Victorian era, circa 1700. 

This thing had to be at least three hundred years old.

He let his mouth drop open, wondering if Sara had any inkling as to its monetary value. He glanced nervously towards the bedroom door, expecting her to step in any second despite the sound of the shower still audible over his shaky breath. He took a moment to flip the pin over in order to check the clasp. Sure enough, it was a c-clasp, typical of that period. He momentarily wished he had his magnifying glass nearby in order to get an even better look but he remembered it was down in the kitchen drawer where he kept it for occasions such as this.

His hands trembled as he let his fingers linger on the back of the brooch, noting its matte appearance, another feature of its authenticity.

It was a thing of rare beauty and he momentarily let himself forget that another man had just offered this expensive piece of jewel to his wife. For a few seconds, he stood in silence, simply admiring its elegance and the intricate design, more so than any other cameo he’d ever seen up close. No matter how inappropriate the gift might be, this Randall guy sure had impeccable taste. Neal momentarily closed his eyes, forcing himself to concentrate on the brooch’s weight in his shaking hand. 

He’d been standing there for a few minutes, examining the brooch, when he realized Sara would be getting out of the shower any minute. He rushed to his side of the bed, grabbing for his phone and placed the cameo on the bed, taking a series of photographs from different angles for examination at a later time. The last test he put the brooch through before returning it to its hiding place was to check its temperature by cradling it in his hand for a few seconds. He felt it cool against his skin, a further sign this was a genuine antique piece of jewelry and not some cheap plastic knockoff. 

The cameo had passed inspection with flying colours. 

Short of examining it carefully under his loupe, there wasn't much more he could do. Setting aside his growing frustration at Sara’s lack of transparency, he prepared to place the beautiful brooch in its hiding place when he heard something in the doorway to their bedroom.

‘Hey Dad!’ Liam called out. 

Neal closed the underwear drawer precipitously and faced his son, a conman smile on his face.

‘Good morning’ he called out. ‘How’d you sleep?’

‘Good… good. It was nice to be in my old bed again.’

Neal reached for a t-shirt on the bedside chair, pulled in on over his head and walked over to join his son.

‘You hungry buddy?’ he asked, bringing his arm around his shoulder. ‘I thought I’d rustle up some blueberry pancakes for breakfast.’

One of the perks of being home was definitely the higher quality fare and Liam smiled broadly in response. The two men prepared to walk out of the room to the sound the shower still running across the way.

‘And didn't you say something about making lasagna for dinner?’ Liam asked, pushing his luck.

WCWCWC

Sara let the warm soothing water slither down her body, hoping it would help wash away the guilt she’d been feeling since the night before. It was almost as if Neal had suspected Randall of giving her that expensive piece of jewelry. Of course that was impossible. The only other person who knew about the gift was Lydia Jordan and she had no reason to go blabbing to Neal.

She’d almost succumbed to his insistent questioning as they’d prepared for bed - if only to assuage her guilt. Who was she kidding? That was no run of the mill thank you gift Randall had presented her with. It was an obscenely expensive piece of jewelry, something she would likely never wear for fear of damaging it or worse yet, losing it. Besides, as much as Sara appreciated its beauty and its worth, it just wasn't something she felt comfortable owning. She’d tried to fool herself about the appropriateness of accepting such a gift but deep down, from the moment she’d first laid eyes on the brooch, she’d known she couldn't keep it. Regardless of whether or not it would hurt Randy’s feelings, she needed to give it back. 

She thought of the two days they’d spent together, going through all the man’s stuff at his Upper East Side apartment. Had she inadvertently been putting out flirtatious vibes? Randy had maintained a level of professionalism throughout although their previous relationship had dictated a friendlier atmosphere than one might expect in a work environment. They had a history after all and there’d been the odd touches and personal comments, just two people who were comfortable with each other, reconnecting after a long time apart. Sara couldn't deny how flattering it was to be on the receiving end of all that attention. The man was charming, of that there was no doubt, but she didn't want him thinking she would ever step out on her husband. Because she never would.

Her mind returned to the brooch… and Neal. He would have a fit if he found out. And with good reason. He already had such a fragile ego when it came to the limits of what he could give his wife in that regard. When they’d first met, he’d had countless ill-gotten goods squirrelled away for a rainy day - things he’d accumulated over all those years living on the edge. He’d wanted nothing more than to shower his new wife with lavish gifts but he’d come to the realization that some things were more important than baubles and expensive trinkets, namely sharing his life as a free man with the people he loved. 

Hope’s arrival had been a game changer for Neal and he’d turned over a new leaf, eager to do the right thing by his little girl and become a good role model for her. From the moment she was born, he’d agonized about the day when, inevitably, she would find out that her dad had been a conman, a forger, a common thief. When they’d finally settled in the Prospect Park neighbourhood of White Plains, he’d wanted nothing more than to leave his old life behind and to become Sara Ellis’ loving husband and Hope and Liam’s devoted daddy. 

For her to accept such an extravagant gift from an old boyfriend would only serve to exacerbate the frail insecurities that still remained under the surface almost twenty-five years later. Although momentarily blinded by Randall Piper and his unlimited wealth, the truth was, Sara didn't need a forty-five thousand dollar cameo in order to be happy. She had everything she needed: she had Neal, their kids and their sometimes mundane but blissfully happy existence. 

She thought ahead to the special night Neal had in store for them and smiled. Her resolve grew as she let out a long slow exhale. She would return the gift the next time she saw Randy. That way, there would be no harm done and Neal would never need to know. 

WCWCWC  
‘Wow!’

It was the third time Peter had let out the exclamation. The two men sat, face to face, in the Burke dining room, picking through some fast food Neal had brought over.

‘I know’ Neal whispered as he took his phone back from Peter’s hand.

‘How much—’ 

Neal didn't even bother letting Peter finish asking the question. ‘Forty-five big ones. He got it at auction. At Fellows. Three years ago. I looked it up.’

‘You’re kidding! And he gave it to Sara?’

Neal nodded. ‘It’s sitting in her dresser drawer at home as we speak.’

‘Holy shit! That’s no costume jewelry.’

Neal shook his head, his eyes returning to the photo on his phone. ‘No shit, Sherlock!’

‘Are you going to confront her?’

‘You mean tell her I went rummaging through her undies drawer to see what I could find?’ he asked rhetorically.

Peter looked at his best friend’s face. Beyond the absolute amazement at the gorgeous piece of jewelry - after all, Neal would always be Neal - he picked up on a level of frustration and a certain sadness in his eyes.

‘I know what you’re thinking Neal’ he said soberly.

‘What? That I could have given Sara a dozen of those things back in the day?’

Peter shrugged. ‘And if that was the case, Sara would be preparing for a conjugal visit right about now.’

Neal scoffed. ‘Right, because that’s about the only way I could ever give her a fraction of the life Piper could give her.’

‘What the hell is wrong with you? This is Sara we’re talking about. She doesn't care about that stuff, she loves you.’

Neal gave Peter a disbelieving eyebrow wag. ‘Have you met my wife?’

‘What is with you lately anyway? Snap out of it! Insecurity does not suit you buddy.’

Neal’s eyes narrowed and he pouted, an actual honest to goodness pout.

‘Look at you, acting like the cute redhead in the class smiled at another boy. Cowboy up, Neal. This is Sara’s job —’

‘Oh, accepting fifty-thousand dollar gifts from ex-boyfriends is Sara’s job’ Neal replied, dropping his voice. ‘What if an ex-boyfriend of Elizabeth’s started sniffing around her, taking her out for expensive meals, plying her with champagne breakfasts…’

‘You don’t know that.’

There was something in Neal’s eyes that gave him away. Peter flashed back to years before when Sara had first gotten pregnant with Liam, how Neal had followed her around for weeks because he was worried for her safety. That had turned into a fiasco and she hadn’t forgiven him for weeks.

‘What did you do, Neal?’

‘Nothing’ he replied defensively.

‘If she didn't tell you about it, how did you know to go looking for this thing in the first place?’

Neal looked away, avoiding Peter’s glare. He let out a loud sigh in lieu of a reply. 

A light came on in Peter’s eyes. ‘It’s Mozzie, isn't it?’ he whispered loudly. ‘What did he do?’

Neal let out a long slow breath. ‘He might have… he might have offered to keep an eye on things, make sure Sara was all right.’  
Peter shook his head in exasperation. ‘Oh, because she’s in so much danger working with a rich client in his Upper East Side apartment.’

‘Stop it!’ Neal said loudly, looking around surreptitiously to make sure Elizabeth wasn’t lurking nearby. 

‘For crying out loud, Neal. Didn't you learn your lesson the last time. Sara’s not some mark, you know, she’s your wife.’

‘Thanks for the 411 on that Peter’ Neal replied with an edge of impatience to his voice.

Peter softened at the sight of Neal looking so forlorn. ‘So, what are you going to do about it?’

Neal shook his head. ‘I’m so mad at her right now… and I had this whole thing planned for tonight. I was going to take her out for a nice meal at Babbo's, a little dancing, a little romance.’

‘How come? Your wedding anniversary is in the summer, isn't it?’

After all these years, Neal was still trying to educate his friend and mentor in the fine art of romance; most times, it seemed like a lost cause.

‘Valentine’s Day, Peter. It’s this little tradition that’s been around since the fourteenth century.’

‘Today is Valentine’s Day?’ Peter asked with alarm.

Try as he might, Neal just couldn't get Peter with the program when it came to celebrating special occasions.

‘Do you think I can still get some flowers for El?’ Peter asked, lowering his voice and glancing towards the staircase where Elizabeth had last been seen.

‘Flowers? Peter, seriously!’ Neal said with shake of his head. ‘You can do better than that.’

‘All the restaurants will be booked…’

‘Would you stop it’ Neal said impatiently. ‘I’ll get you in somewhere, all right? Now, can we please get back to my little problem.’

‘Are you going to confront Sara?’

‘I don’t know. Peter, how could she not tell me? And what else is she keeping from me?’

Peter reached for Neal’s phone on the table, summoning up the photograph once more. ‘It’s hard to resist something like this when it’s offered to you on a silver platter.’

‘Well, it shouldn't be if you’re happy in your marriage’ Neal declared, visibly annoyed.

Peter’s mind appeared to wander. ‘You really think you can get me in somewhere?’

WCWCWC

Sara sat on the edge of her bed, holding the small box in her hands.

‘Can I see it again?’ Elizabeth asked.

Sara gave her a look of exasperation and opened the box for a third time, revealing the gorgeous brooch.

‘Jeez… this guy’s got it bad for you.’

Sara closed her eyes and shook her head. ‘No, it was just a thank you gift El.’

‘And you still haven't told Neal?’

‘Would you parade this in front of Peter if someone else gave it to you?’

‘I suppose not. So, are you going to tell him?’

Sara got to her feet and opened her dresser drawer, lifting a stack of underwear and placing the box underneath. 

‘What’s the point of telling him if I’m giving it back? You know Neal, he’ll take this as some personal slight to his manhood.’

Sara stood there, frowning. ‘I just… I don’t know what possessed me to accept it in the first place.’

‘Has Randy… made any moves on you?’ 

‘Of course not!’ Sara scoffed before reconsidering. ‘Not moves… exactly. He’s just been very friendly and sweet and considerate…’

‘Honey, you’ve got to look at this from Neal’s point of view’ Elizabeth reminded her.

‘I know, I know. That’s just it. He’s going through some… weird stuff right now.’

‘Oh, is he still having issues with his meds?’

‘I’m hoping we’ve got that all sorted out. He’s taking me out to dinner tonight and he’s been hinting all week that he’s ready to… you know, try his luck in the romance department.’

‘Oh, still nothing, huh?’ El said as she thought back to the numerous discussions they’d had on the subject over the past several weeks.

Sara shrugged. ‘Poor guy, it’s got him really rattled. Except for those first few weeks after he got shot, he’s never fallen short in that department.’

El giggled at the pun - which apparently hadn't been intended. ‘Sorry’ she said, placing her hand over her mouth. ‘It’ll all work out, you’ll see.’

‘Well, I’ll feel a lot better when I return this thing to Randy. I should have never accepted it in the first place.’

‘No harm done, right? Just give it back and Neal will never know.’

Sara nodded. ‘So, are you guys doing anything special for Valentine’s Day?

Elizabeth gave a long suffering sigh. ‘You do remember who I’m married to, right?’

‘Aww, come on El. You never know, Peter might surprise you.’

The women rose and Elizabeth glanced over towards the dresser drawer and pointed. 

‘Can I see it one last time?’

WCWCWC

Sara was sitting at her make-up table when Neal returned from downstairs, the aroma of Italian spices permeating the air.

‘Something smells good’ she commented as he pulled off his t-shirt and threw it on the bed.

Except for a few brief exchanges about their plans for the evening, they’d barely spoken since he’d returned from visiting Peter. Sara had chalked it up to him being tired but the truth was Neal was still furious with his wife although he couldn't tell her why without confessing to having had her spied on and to snooping around her undies drawer.

He reached into his pocket, finding his phone and throwing it on top of his shirt, followed by his jeans and his socks.

‘You okay Caffrey?’ she asked with a warm smile. ‘You’ve been awfully quiet all afternoon.’

He stood there in his boxers and forced himself to smile back at her. ‘I’m fine’ he muttered. ‘I’m just going to jump in the shower.’ 

He’d only been gone a minute when his phone buzzed, lighting up the bed.

‘Neal! Your phone is —’

She heard the sound of the shower being turned on and she reached over to take a look at the screen just in case it was Blue Skies calling. The screen read June Ellington School of Art.

‘Neal Caffrey’s phone’ she said.

‘Is this Sara?’

‘Yup, who’s this?’

‘It’s Janelle O’Neill’

‘Oh, hi Janelle. Look, Neal just stepped into the shower. Do you want me to get him to call you back?’

‘No, that’s all right’ the art teacher said, sounding defeated. ‘Actually, maybe you can help me. I’m giving this art history seminar starting in ten minutes and Neal promised to send over his notes from the last time he did it.’

Sara snooped around his night table, coming across a one page outline. ‘The great cathedrals and the inspiration that guided their design’?’ she read into the phone.

‘That’s it!’ Janelle said, sounding relieved. ‘Would you mind texting it to me?’

‘Sure, I can do that’ Sara said. ‘Good luck with your lecture.’

She called up the camera app on Neal’s phone and took a shot of the piece of paper before returning it where she’d found it on the bedside table. She’d just texted a happy face and was about to attach the photo when her mouth dropped open at the sight of one of the other photographs on Neal’s phone. 

It was a picture of the very item that had been haunting her all day.

Busted.

TBC


	45. Chapter 45

From the moment Neal stepped into the shower, he regretted using that standoffish tone of voice with his wife. Sure, he was pissed off at her and disappointed at her lack of transparency but there had to be a way of talking this through like sensible adults. Sara had kept something from him - a forty-five thousand dollar something - but the least he could do was to hear her out. Maybe there was some perfectly innocent explanation for what she’d done although at the moment his anger blinded him to any and all possible explanations for her deceit.

He’d been stewing about it all day. Why not confront her now before passions became even more inflamed. Maybe it was time to lance the boil, so to speak. Get everything out in the open. 

But then again, he reminded himself of just how much he’d been looking forward to sharing this special evening with his wife. He’d been planning it for days and had been prepared to blow a huge wad of cash in the hopes of making it a very memorable night, all in an effort to prove to her - and to himself - that he was just as capable of showing her a good a time as a man like Randall Piper. 

Did he really want to ruin their night out by kicking it off with a major, likely acrimonious, discussion about trust and honesty? 

Warm, soothing water washed down his body as he continued to weigh the pros and cons. Tomorrow morning, over a cup of coffee, they could sit down and he’d ask her calmly why she’d felt the need to keep this from him. He’d let her know how hurt and angry her deception had left him feeling and he’d do his best to hear her out. 

Yeah… that was the way to go. No drama tonight, let’s keep things civil. She didn’t need to know just how mad he was, at least not yet. He could fake it; he was a reformed conman, after all. It would be a piece of cake to plaster on one of his trademark Caffrey smiles and enjoy a good meal out with the woman he loved. 

Putting the confrontation off until morning had the added bonus of giving him time to come up with a plausible explanation as to why he’d been snooping around her underwear drawer in the first place. He knew that, once he confronted her, she would be asking what had compelled him to poke around. Had he been looking for something? How had he known she was hiding an expensive brooch next to her lacy thongs?

He would have to come up with some excuse to placate her but no matter what he conjured up, Sara would be upset that he’d gone behind her back. When it came to her job, she’d always been guarded and discreet. She’d likely become indignant at his lack of maturity, turning the tables on him and accusing him of being impulsive and acting like a jealous husband. She would claim the high moral ground, act all high and mighty, playing the victim when it was obvious he was the wounded party in this sordid little affair.

His blood began to boil again and he reached for the shampoo and began to give his hair a good vigorous scrub, taking his frustration out on his poor innocent scalp.

While Neal ruminated under the hot jets, Sara stared at his phone in disbelief. There wasn’t just one photograph of the cameo but at least a dozen, all from different angles, some wide shots, some close-ups of the background, the edges, the faces. Why would Neal do such a thing? And what had prompted him to go snooping around her dresser drawer looking for expensive jewelry? Had he accidentally come upon it? 

Yeah sure… while he was looking for a pair of frilly undies to wear under his suit! 

She couldn’t think of a single plausible explanation as to why Neal would have gone searching through her stuff. Sure, her husband was notoriously impulsive, a snoop to boot and he could never leave well enough alone. But why had he been looking for the brooch in the first place? 

Lydia! 

That was the only explanation that made any sense. Maybe Lydia had called the house while she was out and had casually mentioned it to Neal. After all, she was the only one who knew about it. Sara felt her lips purse in self-righteous indignation; leave it to Neal to go snooping around behind her back instead of asking her directly about it.

Her mind wandered to the previous night. To be honest, she’d had ample opportunity to tell him about the gift. As a matter of fact, now that she thought about it, it was almost as if he’d been baiting her, daring her to tell him all about it. Did he already know she was hiding something from him?

Sara set the phone down on the bed and returned to her make-up table, checking her reflection in the mirror. She was all decked out in her best little black dress, ready for a night out on the town and looking fantastic if she said so herself. And Neal had booked a table at Babbo - an almost impossible feat on Valentine’s Day. It seemed a shame to have a major blowup and miss out on a great meal at one of her favourite restaurants.

Before this latest wrinkle, she’d been looking forward to having the restaurant’s signature poached halibut with lobster sauce and she’d even been planning on indulging on dessert, perhaps that pistachio and chocolate semifreddo that made her mouth water. Now, she wasn't even sure she wanted to go. 

Damn him! Why couldn't Neal just leave well enough alone? And how long had he known about the cameo? If he’d only kept his nose out of her business, this would have been a non-starter. After all, she was poised to return the damn thing first chance she got. 

But, no! Neal always had to know everything… about everything. 

She stared at herself in the mirror. Maybe she could defer her outrage for a few hours, just long enough to enjoy a nice meal out; she could always confront him when they got home. One thing was for sure, if Neal thought he was going to make it to third base tonight, he was sadly mistaken. She’d feign a headache or something; a girl could fake it long enough to enjoy a five-star meal but there were limits to the depths of depravity she was willing to sink to. 

She decided she’d order wine… lots of wine. Out of respect for Neal, she usually made an effort to hold back on drinking in his presence. But not tonight. She would have a drink before dinner… maybe even two. Then, she’d order the most expensive bottle of wine on the menu and top it off with a limoncello after dessert.

Damn you Caffrey! She checked herself in the mirror one last time and this time, she thought she actually saw steam coming out of her ears.   
WCWCWC

Peter was feeling pretty smug when he and Elizabeth walked into The Black Walnut. It was the perfect little bistro, very high end with an eclectic menu - at least according to their website. This was exactly the kind of place that appealed to his wife and Peter had always lived by the credo ‘Happy wife, happy life.’

Truth was, he’d have been a lot happier sitting in their living room with a beer and a devilled ham sandwich while he watched the Rangers on the tube. But there were certain sacrifices that were well worth it. Blowing a couple of hundred bucks on dinner and having to wear a shirt and tie was a small price to pay if it meant keeping him out of the doghouse.

He glanced at Elizabeth who was smiling broadly, confirmation that she was duly impressed. He owed Neal big time for calling in that last minute favour and getting him a table at one of the trendiest new places in Brooklyn.

‘Honey, this place looks amazing’ El said as they stood by the door and waited to be seated. ‘How did you even hear about it?’

‘Oh, you know… I keep my ear to the ground’ he said self-deprecatingly. ‘So…you like?’

‘So far, I’m very impressed’ she said, gloating. ‘You know Joan up the street? She said she had lunch here last week and it was to die for.’

Peter smiled contentedly. Joan thought it was to die for… he’d really scored big time.

‘But I heard it was hard to get a table’ she said, squeezing his arm. ‘Someone planned ahead. I’m impressed!’

Peter beamed at her. He’d made a narrow escape - once more no thanks to his lack of planning.

‘Good evening!’ the maitre d said in greeting. ‘Reservations?’

‘Yes’ Peter said with just the right touch of pride in his voice. ‘Burke.’

‘Burke… Burke…’ the man searched up and down his long list of reservations at the podium. ‘I don’t seem to… oh, here it is. Ah, yes, Mr. Caffrey called that one in.’

Peter felt his shoulders drooping. He was busted.

‘Follow me’ the man said with a smile.

Elizabeth’s hand fell from Peter’s arm and her eyebrows shot up. 

‘Your ear to the ground, huh?’ she said with exasperation.

WCWCWC 

As expected, Babbo was packed to the rafters on one of the biggest nights of the year. There were couples of all ages, basking in the glow of romance and enjoying a good meal together. Neal had planned ahead and had managed to snag one of the primo tables by the front window, overlooking the busy street. It was probably the best table in the whole place - at least by his estimation.

The drive into Manhattan had been eerily quiet. Sara had appeared surly and Neal hadn’t wanted to poke the bear. Although he had an inkling as to what might have transpired to change her mood, he couldn’t be sure. When he’d stepped out of the shower, she’d mentioned the call from the school and he’d immediately begun to suspect she’d stumbled onto the evidence of his duplicity on his phone. 

Had she seen the pictures of the cameo? And if so, why hadn’t she called him out on it? It was really out of character for Sara to refrain from speaking her mind. She didn't do well with pretence and he knew that if she’d seen the photographs, her anger-meter would have skipped over ‘angry’, gone directly past ‘furious’ and shot up all the way to ‘livid’. The thought of him searching through her stuff and taking photographs of what he’d found would make a woman like Sara Ellis crazy. 

Whereas he tended to stew, Sara had always been more of a ‘let’s confront the situation head on’ kind of person. Neal, on the other hand, was usually content to bide his time and pretend everything was all right up until the moment things could no longer be contained and hit him smack dab in the face. If she had seen the pictures on his phone, he couldn't quite figure out how she’d managed to keep from yelling at him the moment he stepped out the shower. 

Unless, of course, she was feeling more guilty than angry. 

‘What are you having?’ he asked as they both perused the menu.

‘Probably the halibut’ she replied, forcing her voice to remain even. ‘You?’

‘Not sure.’

The waiter was suddenly there, offering libations and Neal waited for Sara to request the usual bottle of gourmet sparkling water. But when she spoke, she caught him totally off guard. 

‘I’ll have a scotch on the rocks’ she said as Neal’s eyes grew in surprise.

Neal nodded and forced a smile. ‘Just a bottle of Sanpellegrino with lemon for me please’ he eked out, slightly embarrassed.

Whenever they shared a bottle of sparkling water, waiters just assumed they were a couple of health freaks. But with Sara throwing back a scotch, he felt like he had a sign tattooed across his forehead: ‘I’M A REFORMED ALCOHOLIC!!!’

‘You don’t mind, do you honey?’ she asked with false deference once the waiter had walked away.

‘Of course not’ he lied.

Truth was, he was the one who usually encouraged her to have a glass of wine when they were out together. There was no reason she shouldn’t enjoy a nice vintage with a good meal. Nine times out of ten, she refused. Something was definitely up.

The conversation between them was strained as they picked apart their appetizer without much enthusiasm. Sara ordered a second drink and Neal forced himself to smile. The more he studied her, the more he suspected she’d found those pictures on his phone and she was pissed off. But then again, so was he. And he had every right to be. 

Her silence was beginning to drive him nuts and Neal started to wonder if he shouldn’t put his cards on the table and put them both out of their misery. What was the worst thing that could happen? Sara might let off some steam but she hated public spectacles so she’d hold back to keep things from devolving into an all out shouting match. Maybe they could still save the evening if they both came clean - or, in his case, partially clean. There was no way on God’s green earth he was confessing to the fact he’d sanctioned Mozzie’s little fishing expedition.

The waiter returned to dispose of their plates and deliver the two hundred dollar bottle of Barolo Sara had ordered for her main course. She looked defiantly at Neal as she downed the first glass and smacked her lips loudly.

Oh yeah, she was pissed. 

It was time to nip this in the bud before things got any uglier. The only thing worse than a furious Sara was a drunken, furious Sara. If Neal made use of his considerable charm, maybe he could give a reasonable explanation for how he’d come across the little red box - one that didn't involve the fact that Mozzie had been trailing her all over town - with Neal’s blessing. 

‘Honey, funny thing… you know what I was thinking today?’ he said innocently. ‘I was remembering that cute little number I bought for you from Victoria Secret, you know the one you wore when I took you to the Mirror Lake Inn.’

Sara stared back at him, her face humourless. Was this really how he was going to play this? Pretend he was looking for a pair of frilly undies when what he'd really been doing was invading her privacy?

‘I got to wondering if you still had it’ Neal continued with an edge to his voice. ‘So, I went looking in your drawer.’

She remained silent, waiting for him to continue to dig his hole deeper. 

Neal began to regret bringing it up, his own anger simmering. Why was it all right for her to act all high and mighty about him invading her privacy when she’d been keeping such a huge secret from him?

He decided to give her one last chance to come clean. ‘Is there something you want to tell me about before I tell you what I found in your drawer?’ he asked, now that he’d led her all the way to the water’s edge.

‘Is there something I want to tell you?’ she replied with indignation. ‘Is there something you want to tell me?’ she retorted.

‘What do you mean?’

‘Stop it Neal’ she whispered angrily as she leaned across the table. ‘I saw the pictures on your phone. Stop pretending you were looking for a pair of goddamn underwear.’ 

She let her voice drop although there was no mistaking the anger in her voice. ‘I know you found that cameo.’

Neal swallowed and waited for the other shoe to drop.

‘It was Lydia, wasn't it?’

He had no clue what she was talking about but he decided to play along. Maybe if he kept his mouth shut long enough, she would end up doing all of the heavy lifting and he wouldn't have to lift a finger.  
To his silence she continued. ‘I knew it. She called the house, didn't she? She’s the one who told you Randy had given me a thank you gift.’

Again, Neal remained quiet, neither confirming nor denying.

‘You had no right to go snooping through my stuff without asking me.’

‘I had no right!’ he replied with the same intensity. ‘You’re a fine one to talk.’

He looked around at the other diners who all seemed engrossed in their own conversations - none of them as rancorous as the one they were having.

He began to wag his finger in her face, the anger finally spilling out. 

‘Your ex-boyfriend gave you an obscenely expensive piece of jewelry and you kept it from me. How do you think that makes me feel?’

Sara glared at him, momentarily flustered. ‘And you went behind my back and snooped in my dresser like a common thief.’

He stared back at her in disbelief. ‘I don’t understand why my wife would be accepting —’

‘Here we are’ said the waiter, interrupting. He placed their entrées before them and refilled Sara’s wine glass while Neal placed his hand over his to let him know he wouldn’t be partaking of the expensive bottle of wine. 

They grew silent for a moment, staring down at their plates. Suddenly, they both seemed to have lost their appetites.

The waiter walked away and Neal continued, trying to contain his anger. ‘Sara, what are you doing accepting a gift like that from an ex-boyfriend. Do you have any idea how much that thing is worth?’

‘He’s a client Neal’ she replied as calmly as she could muster.

‘Oh, because your clients are in the habit of buying you fifty-thousand dollar pieces of jewelry!’

Sara didn’t have an immediate retort so she began to pick mindlessly at her halibut, ignoring him. 

Neal could feel his heart thumping loudly in his chest.

Sara got her second wind. ‘Don’t make this about the brooch. You had no right to go snooping —’ 

Neal cut her off. He was beyond frustrated. ‘Yeah, yeah, whatever!’ he replied as he stared down at his plate.

Sara got to her feet and stared at him as he glared back, both of them equally angry and out of control. She threw her napkin onto her plate as everyone at the neighbouring tables turned to see what was going on.

‘You know what Neal?’ she shouted, her tone impatient. ‘I was going to…’ she began, preparing to tell him of her intention to return the gift. She thought better of it and stopped abruptly, hurt by the look of mistrust in his eyes. 

‘Oh, never mind!’ she spat out, grabbing for her purse.

Neal stared back, his mouth hanging open as she stormed off. He was on his feet instantly but alas, too late to keep her from making a dramatic exit. For a minute there, he dared to hope she’d just gone into the ladies room to compose herself but to his dismay, he saw her fly past the window outside, flagging a cab as she went.

The waiter returned, reacting to the kerfuffle. 

‘Sir, is there a problem with your meal?’ 

Neal just stood there, shell shocked, staring at the snow falling gently outside. ’N-n-no, no.’ 

‘Is the lady coming back?’ the man asked, seeing the state of Neal.

He shook his head and pointed to their uneaten plates. ‘Could you… wrap this up for me?’

WCWCWC

Caitlin was in a celebratory mood. Liam had managed to get her job back for her and now, he’d included her in his little Saturday night soirée. From the moment she’d first stepped into the Caffrey home, all she’d ever wanted was to feel like she was part of the family and the fact that Liam had invited her along to watch the hockey game with his friends only added to that wonderful sense of belonging. 

She returned from the corner store, arms laden with chips, candy and other assorted junk food and proceeded to unload the bags onto the kitchen counter while Liam filled the fridge with beer and pop.

‘So, who’s all coming tonight?’ she asked.

‘A few of the guys I used to play basketball with. Do you remember Jeff Jarvis?’

‘Tall skinny guy?’ she replied as she proceeded to unpack the grocery bags.

Liam scoffed. ‘It’s a basketball team, Caitlin. You just described every single guy I ever played with.’

She chuckled. ‘The ginger guy?’

‘Yeah, the ginger guy. And Jake and Renée are coming, you remember them, right?’

‘Renée? Black, tall, played on the girl’s team?’

‘Yup, that’s her. And I think Mark Shephard might be coming. Basically, I told Will to invite anyone he wanted to — as long as we keep it under ten people. Don’t want Mom and Dad to have a heart attack when they get back.’

‘Maybe we can drag in a couple of armchairs from the living room and move the tv to make more room’ Caitlin suggested.

Liam couldn't help but notice the good mood Caitlin was in. ‘You look really chipper. Is that because of your job?’

‘In part… I’ve decided not to let my mom and my brother dictate my mood. I’m just going to forget about them and concentrate on living my life.’

Liam looked up from inside the fridge. ‘Sounds like a plan.’

Caitlin stepped in closer. ‘Can I get your advice on something?’

He nodded. ‘I think I’m finally zeroing in on a major for school next fall. I’ve been thinking maybe child studies or a teacher’s degree.’

‘You know, I totally get that you wanted to take a year off before you made a decision about university but I’ve always known that you’d end up working with kids. You’re good at it.’

She beamed at him. The doorbell rang and Liam made his way to greet his guests. He could hear loud voices through the door even before he’d let them in; obviously, they’d decided to car pool.

He opened the door to a single girl surrounded by a group of boisterous young men.

‘Is this hockey central?’ she asked with a broad smile as they prepared to step in. 

Will stood towards the back of the pack and to Liam’s utter surprise, he’d brought along an extra guest with him.

WCWCWC

Neal trudged along the snowy sidewalk on his way to the car. He shivered and pulled up his collar, a large doggy bag hanging from his wrist. He couldn't remember a worse Valentine’s Day in all the years he and Sara had been together. Why couldn't he have just left well enough alone? If he’d stuck to his original plan, he and Sara could have had a nice, pleasant dinner and saved the difficult conversation for the following day in the privacy of their own home. Instead, they’d had a major blowup in a roomful of strangers and he was pretty sure that if Babbo kept a blacklist, his name was among those listed, in permanent ink. 

The wind almost blew his hat off and he brought his hand up to his head to keep it from flying away. He hoped Sara would make it home safely. She’d had a fair bit to drink and she was a lightweight when it came to booze. Two large scotches and a glass and a half of wine within an hour would be more than enough to destabilize her although she’d looked pretty sure footed when he’d seen her hoof it down the snow covered street in her four inch heels. He was just about to step into the car when he felt a vibration against his chest. He threw his fedora on the passenger seat and fumbled to find his phone. 

‘Sara!’ he said breathlessly as he brought the phone to his ear.

‘Mr. Caffrey? It’s Ellen… from Blue Skies.’

‘Ellen?’ he repeated with a frown as he refocussed. ‘What is it? What’s wrong?’

‘I wanted to let you know your mom is really not doing well. She seems to have relapsed.’

‘Relapsed?’ Neal repeated.

‘I’ve called for the doctor. She’s complaining of chest pain and she’s started running a fever again.’

Neal’s eyes narrowed as he stepped into the car, placing the bag of food on the seat next to him.

‘I’m about forty-five minutes away but I’ll be there as soon as I can.’

He started the car and called Sara’s cell on his bluetooth. He wasn't surprised to hear it go to voicemail. 

‘Sara, it’s me. My mom’s taken a turn for the worse. I’m going to head on over there. I thought you’d like to know…’

He hung up and pulled out into Manhattan traffic, unsure what awaited him at the other end.

WCWCWC

Liam was in the kitchen refilling chip bowls when Cody sauntered in to give him a hand. 

‘I hope you don't mind me tagging along’ he said with a mischievous grin.

Liam gave him a warm smile. ‘Do I look like I mind?’ he replied flirtatiously.

Cody shrugged. ‘Will told me you’d been having a rough time… and he told me about what happened to your boyfriend.’

‘Ex-boyfriend’ Liam corrected.

‘Right, ex-boyfriend. Here, I’ll take those’ he added, taking the bowls from Liam’s hands.

Their hands brushed and they both smiled at the awkwardness of the moment. 

‘Is this what they call a serendipitous moment?’ Cody asked. 

There was a loud collective scream from the family room; the Rangers had just taken the lead.

‘So, when do you head back?’

‘I’m taking the train at five tomorrow.’

‘Do you have time to meet up for coffee before you leave?’ Cody asked.

‘Blue Moon? For old times sake’ Liam suggested.

‘Sounds good to me.’

WCWCWC

Sara had been riding in the yellow cab for about thirty minutes. It was pure lunacy to be taking a taxi all the way from Greenwich Village to White Plains. There were several much more cost effective ways of getting home but at the moment, she didn't give a rat’s ass. Her anger towards Neal raged on as she tapped her foot repeatedly on the car floor mat, feeling the slush on the carpet under her foot. So what if the cab ride was going to cost close to two hundred bucks; Neal could foot the bill and add it to the long list of expenses for the worst Valentine’s Day celebration she could ever remember. 

The alcohol she’d imbibed had clouded her judgement and had prompted her to act precipitously, leaving her husband sitting all alone to face the fallout - and foot the bill. Now that the effect of the booze was starting to dissipate, she was beginning to realize how silly this all was. 

Both she and Neal were equally to blame for the turn of events.

It was true, Neal had violated her privacy and acted, not for the first time and probably not the last, like a total ass by being so curious and impulsive. But that wasn’t the only reason she was pissed off. There was plenty of blame to go around and she needed to shoulder some of it herself. 

Ever since Randall Piper had come back into her life, she’d been acting like a silly schoolgirl, oblivious to how her behaviour was affecting her husband of almost twenty-five years. Randy’s reappearance in her life had made her feel like a kid again. But the truth was she wasn’t a kid, she was a fifty-six year old woman, a wife, a mother and no matter how pleasant the escape of the last few weeks had been, her relationship with Randall Piper was just business and would never be anything more. 

Randy had been more than happy to flaunt his lavish lifestyle and Sara had fallen for it, hook line and sinker. But she should have known better; it was all a mirage, there was no substance there. This was not the life she was meant to live nor, if she was truly honest with herself, was it the life she wanted for herself.

Neal, on the other hand, had been steadfast by her side since the day they said I do. He’d seen her at her very best but more importantly, he’d seen her at her lowest and he'd never once thought about bailing on her. 

Not once. 

For years, she’d done her best to reassure him that she didn't want that kind of life but by hiding this expensive piece of jewelry from him, she’d inadvertently fed into his insecurities. 

Of course Neal would react this way. How else would a man like Neal Caffrey react? By keeping this silly secret from him, she’d been insensitive to his frailties and she’d led him to believe that a life with the all the shiny things a man like Randall Piper could give her was what she wanted when nothing could be further from the truth.

Neal had given up so much for her, for their family. He’d walked away from a life of crime - a life that had also been full of adventure, excitement and possibilities. He’d given it all up without a second thought to become a loving, faithful husband and a father Hope and Liam could be proud of. But underneath the swagger and the charming ways, Neal was just a man, a man with frailties and insecurities, a man who wondered how things might have turned out if he'd kept living the high life, a man who, upon entering his sixties, had begun to second guess what the years ahead had in store for him, a man who needed to know that he would always be number one in the eyes of the woman he loved.

She felt her phone vibrating in her purse once again and she reached in to take a look. 

She forced her eyes to focus. A text. From Neal.

My mom’s taken a turn for the worse. On my way over there now.

She leaned in to speak to the taxi driver. ‘Change of plans’ she said. ‘I need you to take me to New Rochelle.’

TBC


	46. Chapter 46

The rusted out Chevy idled by the curb at the front of the house while the couple inside huddled against each other in an effort to keep warm.

Cam sighed loudly. ‘I wish you were coming home with me tonight.’

‘I know… but I promised my dad’ Hope pouted in empathy.

Cameron was visibly irked, feeling cheated out of their usual Saturday night sleepover. ‘But it’s Valentine’s Day’ he complained.

She pulled away to better examine his face under the glow of the streetlamp.

‘I know it’s Valentine’s Day sweetie… and dinner was really lovely.’

‘But…’

The substandard heater blared full throttle, making a loud choking sound which resonated throughout the car.

‘Come on Cam, don’t be like that’ she chided him. ‘It’s just one night. Dad asked Liam and I to do this one thing for him so he could surprise Mom when they get back.’

‘Me’ he corrected.

‘Huh?’

‘It’s ‘Liam and me’ not ‘Liam and I’ he said with a twinkle in his eye.

‘I always get those two mixed up…’ Hope admitted with an amused grin.

‘It’s easy. When the pronoun is the subject it’s —’

Hope cut him off with a kiss and Cameron groaned lustfully at the unexpected assault on his lips.

‘Mmmm… don’t go’ he moaned, pulling her into him.

Hope shook her head in desperation. ‘You big goof! I’ll see you again tomorrow night’ she said affectionately. ‘And maybe I’ll even sleep over at your place.’

He smiled, seemingly satisfied with deferring his self gratification. His mind appeared to wander. ‘Did I tell you that your dad asked me if I wanted to have lunch tomorrow while all you ladies are strategizing about the wedding?’

She took that in for a moment. Ever since their engagement, her dad had been saying he wanted to sit Cam down and have a heart to heart. Now that Cameron Armstrong was joining the Caffrey family, Neal was of the opinion that the young man deserved to know the whole truth about his future father-in-law’s illicit past.

Neal had agonized every single time he'd been forced to come clean about his deep dark secret with someone from his present day life. Just recently, circumstances had compelled him to open up to Caitlin and although painful, the experience had left him feeling oddly relieved. Ever since she’d moved into their home, he’d lived in fear of Caitlin accidentally finding out he was a convicted criminal who’d served time in a federal penitentiary. Worse yet, he fretted about Mozzie spilling the beans and, in his usual outlandish style, telling the tale about some crazy adventure they’d had while on the lam.

Things were slightly different where Cam was concerned. Whereas Caitlin was still a vulnerable young person under his tutelage, Cameron was an adult, capable of discerning facts and coming to his own, mature conclusions. Caitlin had been particularly at risk, considering her own rather erratic past, and Neal had worried about glamourizing his previous life of crime or worse yet, losing her respect. He had similar fears with Cam although he didn't feel the same level of responsibility for the young man’s safety and well-being. But Cameron had been his protégé and Neal cared very much what the young man thought of him, fearing he might lose his respect when he finally heard about the not so stellar highjacks from Neal’s past.

The irony, of course, was that the information about his illegal activities was readily available to anyone with an inkling to type in his name and the acronym ‘FBI’ in the little google search box of their computer. A dozen or so webpages would pop up, touting his successful work release with the New York Bureau’s white collar unit, his collaboration with his handler Peter Burke and the unlikely circumstances that had brought him to the Bureau in the first place.

No one would have any reason to go looking, of course - least of all someone like Cam. But Neal had explained to his daughter that the young man was about to become a member of their family and he deserved to know the whole truth about his father-in-law’s activities as a younger man.

‘Lunch, huh?’ she said. ‘That’s nice…’ 

Hope was confident that nothing could ever alter her fiancé’s opinion of her beloved dad. Neal had given Cameron a break when he’d first moved to New York and Cam was grateful for all Neal had done for him. He’d been in the older man’s class at NYU when Neal had offered him a job at the newly opened Raphael Gallery. More importantly, his arrival at the gallery had led to his fateful first meeting with the lovely young woman who was about to become his wife.

‘Do you think I did something wrong?’ he asked, suddenly worried.

She chuckled. ‘Of course not, silly. He probably just wants to… bond with you. Anyway, it’s my dad, Cam. You’ve known him for what, over five years.’

‘Seven years and two months’ he clarified.

‘There you go, seven years and two months. My dad loves you. He just wants to know you feel the same way about him.’

‘That’s a weird thing to say. Of course I care about him. He’s the best’ Cameron said, bringing his finger to gently tap the tip of her nose. ‘He raised _you_ , didn't he?’

She let herself slip back into his open arms, the heater hiccuping as it tried in vain to warm the cold winter night.

‘Now…’ she teased, eyebrows wagging. ‘Are you going to warm me up properly before sending me out into the cold?’

WCWCWC

In another car, miles away, Sara Ellis stared up at the Blue Skies Nursing Home, wondering if she was sober enough to go inside. She didn't want to be a stumbling idiot when she went in to find out about her mother-in-law’s condition.

‘Is this the place?’ the driver asked gruffly.

‘Yes, yes’ Sara muttered. ‘Just… just give me a minute.’

‘The meter’s running lady’ he reminded her.

She glared at him. ‘I get it, the meter’s running’ she replied dryly.

She checked the display, the fare clocking in at just over eighty-seven dollars; in for a penny, in for a pound. She reached into her purse for her pocketbook and something tumbled out onto her lap.

‘Lady…’

She glared at the man through the glass. ‘Look, am I keeping you from something?’ she replied, her tone snarky.

‘It’s your dime, lady’ the man said, settling in to wait for her to be ready.

Sara reached for the dome light above her head so she could see what had fallen out of her wallet - certainly nothing that she remembered putting there. Her eyes widened at the sight of an envelope with an illustration on top - a pencil drawing of her looking more amazing than she ever remembered looking. Underneath, in her husband’s tidy calligraphy:

_To my beautiful wife,_ _my one and only._ _I was lost, rudderless and floundering_ _until I met you._

She gasped as she picked it up to better examine it. There was something inside and Sara slipped her finger under the flap, releasing a folded piece of pale pink paper. On it, were small, spartan sketches of herself, about eight or nine in total - some recent, others with her looking much younger, still others with one of the kids when they were little.The sketches, drawn in pencil, almost looked unfinished as if in the first stage of what would eventually become a full-fledged painting. In the middle of the page, nestled amongst the numerous drawings, she found another, longer text, again in beautiful calligraphy which could only have been penned by one person.

Sara let out a muffled cry and brought her hand up to cover her mouth. Leave it to Neal to come up with a Caffrey original to celebrate the occasion. She thought of the store bought card that was still tucked away in the bottom of her purse and was destined for her Valentine.

‘Caffrey, you idiot!’ she murmured under her shaky breath.

The cab driver glanced in the rearview mirror. ‘You okay lady?’ he asked, likely more interested in getting on to his next fare than her well-being. 

She sat there speechless. Obviously, Neal had slipped the envelope into her wallet before their little tiff - which right about now, seemed so petty and childish.

‘Lady?’ the man repeated.

She sighed and grabbed for her credit card, handing it to him and finalizing her transaction. Within seconds, she was standing alone outside the nursing home late on a Saturday night as the soft snow danced around her. The building was mostly dark, considering the late hour, and Sara did a mental count of the windows up on the fourth floor, trying to locate Linda’s room. Contrary to most of the darkened windows, the light emanating from the small square lit up the dark night like some sort of beacon.

What was happening inside? Was Linda on her deathbed? Was Neal already there, by her side? Did he want her there with him? Or had he just texted her so she wouldn't be worried when he didn't come home?

She tested her footing on the light dusting of snow and despite the fact she was wearing heels - and slightly intoxicated - she was relieved to find her balance was steady. Just to be on the safe side, she reached for the handrail and climbed the few short steps up to the main entrance and into the lobby.

The night receptionist buzzed her in and Sara recognized her young, earnest face, having seen her dozens of times.

‘Mrs. Caffrey!’ the young woman said before Sara could speak. She thought she heard alarm in her voice.

She was only slightly older than Caitlin - probably a student putting herself through college with a part-time job. Sara noticed an open textbook on the desk in front of the young woman. Suddenly, she felt bad for not knowing her name.

‘Your husband asked me to be on the lookout for you. He’s already upstairs with Mrs. Bennett.’

Sara was afraid to ask her next question. ‘My mother-in-law… is she…’

‘The nursing staff called for the doctor’ she said with surprising aplomb despite her young age - probably from dealing regularly with anxious family members.

Sara was relieved to hear the confidence in her voice.

‘I think he’s still up there.’

Sara nodded and forced a smile.

‘Thanks…’ she said, hesitating. ‘I’m sorry, I don't even know your name.’

‘Mia’ the blond woman said with a smile; apparently, pleased to be asked.

‘Thanks… Mia’ Sara said before heading down the hall towards the elevator.

Her gait, which had been steady a moment earlier, seemed a little off and she reached for the handrail that lined all the hallways of the Blue Skies Nursing Home. She arrived at the elevator, stepping in and steadying herself against the wall, feeling the small confined space closing in on her as her head began spinning.

Damn it! She should have stopped for coffee.

Although she wasn't particularly religious, Sara closed her eyes for a brief instant, her hand still holding on to the wall as she said a little prayer.

WCWCWC

‘A little higher’ Caitlin directed as Liam teetered on his tiptoes atop the armchair in the corner of his parents’ bedroom.

‘Careful!’ Hope added as he momentarily lost his footing.

Liam used the two-sided tape to secure the piece of material to the ceiling above the bed and tugged lightly to create the desired effect.

‘How’s that?’ he asked.

‘That looks good’ Caitlin commented with a thumbs up gesture.

Neal had left very specific instructions as to how he wanted the bedroom set up. He’d gone into the sewing centre at the local mall and bought up yards and yards of off white tulle and he’d instructed them to dig out the dozens of fairy lights they kept in the garage to decorate the Christmas tree. The effect was a soft, low hanging ceiling dotted with countless stars - exactly what he was looking for to set the scene for romance following a nice dinner out.

Liam had been planning to sack out on the hide-a-bed down in the family room and Hope had suggested that Caitlin bunk in with her up in her room on the third floor — all in an effort to give their parents a little bit more privacy.

‘Dad said he wanted the champagne bucket up here. Where do they keep it, anyway?’ Hope asked, hovering in the doorway to the room.

Liam shrugged and continued with the job at hand. ‘Beats me.’

‘I think it’s somewhere in the pantry’ Caitlin offered. ‘What about that present Mr. C wanted us to leave out on the bed for your mom?’

Hope wandered back into the room and over to the other side of the bed where she got down on all fours.

‘Here’ she said, pulling out a large square box from underneath the bed like a magician pulling a rabbit out of a hat.

‘I wonder what it is?’ Caitlin said, her hand lingering on the professionally wrapped gift.

Hope shrugged. ‘Haven’t a clue but knowing Dad, I’m sure it’s something romantic.’

‘How come your mom never does stuff like this for your dad?’ Caitlin asked.

The siblings shared a knowing look. ‘She tried a few times but… either Dad finds out about it ahead of time or she messes it up somehow.’

Hope turned to face her brother. ‘Remember that time she tried to make him a cake for their anniversary’ she said, giggling.

Caitlin waited for the punch line. ‘She made this torte or something. Really out of her comfort zone. Anyway, she and Dad got home from having dinner out and they found the empty plate on the floor and Raffie snoring in the middle of the kitchen in the middle of a pile of crumbs.’

Liam laughed. ‘Yeah! Mind you, knowing Mom’s culinary talents, that was probably a blessing in disguise. Then, there was the time she blindfolded him to take him out for dinner’ he told Caitlin.

‘She backed the car out onto the street and hit the lamppost on Mrs. Beamish’s front lawn. That ended up costing Dad a few hundred bucks and then he complained for months that their car insurance premiums had gone up.’

‘She kind of gave up after that’ Hope explained. ‘She says Dad’s a lot better at surprises than she is.’

‘Anyway’ Liam added, ‘Dad loves doing stuff like this, he says he likes to see her eyes light up when she’s surprised.’

Liam’s feet were back on terra firma and he looked up, admiring his handiwork. He made his way to the door jamb and let his hand hover over the overhead light switch which had been turned on to help navigate the complex decorating project.

‘So, are we ready?’ he asked, waiting for the signal from the girls.

‘Do it!’ Hope called out as he flicked off the switch.

The effect was nothing short of magical, the fairy lights hanging from the ceiling like stars in the sky, the tulle making everything soft and warm and intimate.

There was a collective sigh of admiration as the threesome took in the overall look of the room.

‘I hope I meet someone as romantic as Mr. C someday’ Caitlin sighed.

After years of watching their parents’ romance unfold, Hope and Liam were constantly surprised at the lengths their dad would go to in romancing their mother, especially after all their years of marriage.

‘Yup’ Liam said with a wide grin. ‘One thing you can say about Dad, he’s the last of the romantics.’

‘All right, who wants to help me find that champagne bucket?’ Hope asked.

Liam nodded. ‘Oh yeah, and what about those flower petals we’re supposed to spread over the bed?’

The trio disappeared down the hall, chatting away as they made their way downstairs.

WCWCWC

Dinner out for the Burkes had gone off without a hitch despite the fact Peter had been exposed as a fraud. To her credit, Elizabeth had let it slide, preferring instead to enjoy the amazing food and her husband’s undivided attention — while it lasted.When they finally made it home, she gave him an almost imperceptible head nod — shorthand for ‘ _you’re off the hook’ —_ and Peter’s face lit up like a Christmas tree _._

‘Thanks honey’ he exclaimed as he gave her a peck on the cheek and ran to the fridge to grab a beer. Within seconds, he’d taken off his jacket and tie and rolled up his shirt sleeves, settling in front of the tube to catch the last few minutes of the hockey game.

While the low roar of the television rumbled in the background, Elizabeth got to work pulling out some wedding paraphernalia and setting it out on the kitchen island. She had invited Hope, Sara, Caitlin and Olivia Mason over for brunch the next day in order to start planning what she hoped would be the wedding of the year.

She’d decided to heed her husband’s advice and start slow, letting the bride outline her vision for her special day. But then again, she wouldn't be doing her job if she didn't offer some advice - that’s why people paid her the big bucks, after all. Not that she’d be charging her goddaughter a single penny for her services. But that didn't matter to Elizabeth Burke. It was more important than ever to get things right whenever she was planning an event for friends or members of her family - which Hope Ellis-Caffrey definitely was.

She glanced down at the bridal magazine cover of a beautiful dress, complete with lace and taffeta crinoline. Hope would look amazing in that, she reflected.

Peter appeared from behind, placing his half-empty beer on the counter and running his hands languidly down her back. She noticed with surprise that the hum of the television had been silenced.

‘What happened to the game?’ she asked, melting in his arms.

Peter let his lips linger on her bare neck. ‘This is more important than a hockey game’ he cooed.

‘Rangers are losing, huh?’ she said, seeing right through his little act.

He shrugged. ‘Big time’ he admitted with a naughty smirk.

He let his arms circle her waist and tugged at her gently.

‘Anyway’ he moaned in her ear. ‘I would much rather take my beautiful wife upstairs than watch a bunch of overgrown men fighting over a puck.’

‘Wow!’ El said with a sarcastic smirk. ‘You sure know how to charm a girl.’

WCWCWC

Linda Bennett’s room was located at the end of a long corridor on the fourth floor of the Blue Skies Nursing Home. Neal hadn’t much paid attention to the hallway in all the times he’d been there; it had always been just a conduit to his mom’s room, barely worth a second glance. Now, pacing outside as he waited for the green light to go into the room, he seemed acutely aware of every detail: the tasteful but worthless reproductions lining the walls, the shiny marble-like floor, the institutional beige colour of the walls, the dim lighting.

More startling was the quiet all around him. He could hear himself breathe, his intake rough and uneven.

Of course, he didn't usually visit at ten at night and frankly, he’d never really thought of this place as anything but bustling as nurses and attendants saw to their patients’ multiple needs. There was usually laughter, the odd resident calling for a nurse, the sound of the staff’s voices as they exchanged information or chatted with one of their charges. Now, all he could hear was the hushed sound of the resident doctor’s voice coming from behind the closed door of his mother’s room.

He sauntered past the few chairs littering the hallway, uninterested in taking a seat and continued the up and down pacing he’d been doing since he'd arrived ten minutes earlier. He’d had a brief chat with one of the nurses on duty and he'd been invited to take a seat in the sitting room which doubled as the dining room while he waited. He’d preferred to wait outside the room so he could have a chat with the doctor the moment he finished his examination.

His ears perked up as he heard loud coughing… his mom. It was taking a great deal ofrestraint not to knock on the door and walk right in but Neal managed to hold back. 

He heard a squeaking sound and glanced up the hall as one of the staff members walked towards him on her way to one of the other rooms.

She spoke as she got closer. ‘You sure you don’t want to have a seat in the waiting room Mr. Caffrey. It could be a while yet until Dr. Pearson finishes examining your mom.’

He forced a smile. ‘I’m good, thanks’ he said as she walked past him. ‘Oh, have you seen my wife down by the nursing station?’

‘Not yet’ the older woman said quietly. ‘But I’m sure she’ll be here any minute.’

Right… Neal thought. Obviously, this woman hadn't been privy to the animated discussion — read out and out fight — he'd had less than an hour ago with his wife. He nodded and smiled again for good measure.

He pulled out his phone. Still no response from Sara. He began to wonder if she’d even seen his text. Maybe he should try again. Or maybe he should have been a little more explicit.

_‘I really need you here with me because I’m scared as hell.’_

Or maybe…

_‘I know we’re in the middle of a major blowup but can you please come over and hold my hand.’_

Or perhaps…

_‘I love you and I know I’ve been acting like a total idiot.’_

Any of those messages would have done the trick but what he really wanted was for Sara to read between the lines — like she always did when it came to deciphering her husband’s words and behaviour. She was good at that, had been decoding his body language and verbal cues for a long time. He hoped tonight would be no exception. He returned to his pacing, counting his footsteps subconsciously as he got to the end of the corridor and turned around, like a sentinel standing guard. He stared down at the floor, realizing he’d been avoiding stepping on the lines in the pattern of the smooth surface that made the floor look like tiles.

_Step on a crack… break your mother’s back_ he repeated over and over by rote.

He shook his head and tried to refocus, returning to the long list of questions for the doctor that had begun percolating in his tired brain. What were they dealing with exactly? How would they treat her symptoms? Had she agreed to treatment? How was this likely to play out? Was she —.

His ears perked up as he heard a rhythmic clicking sound - certainly not the staff’s quiet soft soled footsteps. He held his breath and listened as the sound grew louder. He immediately recognized the familiar clickety clack and he’d turned to look down towards the other end of the hall when he spotted her coming around the corner.

His angel.

WCWCWC

Liam lay on his back on the hide-a-bed in the unusually quiet family room with Raffie’s breathing his only company. It was weird to be down there, the moonlight steaming in, giving every familiar item in the room an unfamiliar glow. He couldn't remember ever spending a night down there except maybe on one occasion, years ago, when he’d given up his room to his aunt Emily on one of her earlier visits.

Seeing Cody again had been a wonderfully unexpected surprise and had done him a world of good. Liam hadn't asked how it had come to be and frankly he didn't much care. Had Will reached out to Cody and invited him along? Had Cody been the one to take the first step? Maybe he'd gotten wind that Liam was in town and had asked Will if he could tag along. In the end, it really didn't matter. The important thing was that Cody had made the decision to come over and as far as preliminary steps were concerned, this one seemed to Liam to be a very promising harbinger of things to come.

One thing was for sure, Cody hadn't come over because of any fervent interest in hockey. He wasn’t much into sports; as a matter of fact, he’d always put up with Liam’s passion in deference to his boyfriend and nothing more.

Which left only a couple of options: either he’d come for the awesome snacks or he’d come so he could spend some time with Liam.

A smile appeared on Liam’s lips. All those strange tummy flip-flops and insistent butterflies that appeared without fail whenever Cody was within fifty feet of him had been present all evening. Liam barely remembered who’d been there or what the outcome of the game had been. All he could remember was spending most of the evening sneaking peeks at Cody while pretending to watch the game. He would have gladly slipped up to his room with his ex to have a nice private chat and forgone his other guests and the hockey game if that hadn't been so rude and inappropriate.

His heart skipped a beat as he thought ahead to the following day. He was going to have Cody all to himself for a couple of hours and he began plotting the conversation they might have when they were finally alone. Of course, he wanted to fill him in on everything that had been happening with Todd and he wanted to hear every little thing that was going on in Cody’s life. He tried not to get ahead of himself. It was just two old friends getting together for coffee, that was all.

Hell no!

It was a lot more than that. At least for him. _And_ for Cody, if Liam was reading the signals right. He knew his ex pretty well and a few times, he thought he’d spotted that unmistakeable look in his eyes: the one that said _I’m about to lean in and kiss you_ or _you make my heart beat faster than a hundred meter dash._

It was a sentiment he shared with Cody Miller.

WCWCWC

Sara grew conscious of the clicking sound of her heels against the terrazzo as she started a slow jog towards the hallway to Linda’s room. Neal heard her coming before she even stepped into view, the oh so familiar staccato beat of her heels echoing off the granite floor. It was always a happy sound, heralding her arrival and tonight, it brought solace and comfort at a time when he needed her the most. He followed the sound echoing down the hall, holding his breath, and was almost all the way down the corridor when she finally came into view.

The best thing he’d seen all night.

He picked up speed, calling out her name as she got closer. Despite their recent quarrel and the lingering feelings of animosity, there was no hesitation as their arms reached out for each other. Once his arms were solidly clasped around her, so tight that she could barely breathe, he let his head settle in the crook of her neck.

‘Babe…’ she heard him whisper breathlessly, the familiar feeling of his warm breath against her skin.

TBC


	47. Chapter 47

‘So, what’s it like to be in love?’

The question came under cover of darkness as the two young women snuggled together on the bed up on the third floor.

‘What?’ Hope asked, turning to face Caitlin.

‘You know, you and Cam, what’s it like to be in love with someone?’

Hope pushed herself up onto her elbow. ‘You’ve never been in love?’

Caitlin scoffed. ‘I don’t think so.’

‘But Liam said you were seeing this guy during your last year at White Plains High. What was his name, Trevor or something?’

‘Taylor’ Caitlin corrected. ‘And it wasn't serious. I’m not even sure I’m capable of falling in love.’

‘What do you mean? Of course you are, everybody’s capable of falling in love.’

‘I don’t know if I’d be able to put someone else’s needs ahead of my own… like people do when they’re in love or when they have kids.’

‘It’s not that hard, it just happens naturally. When you love someone, you just care so much about them that you want what’s best for them and you’d do pretty well anything for them to be happy.’

Caitlin let herself fall on her back and tucked her hand in under her pillow.

‘You know I haven't seen that many good relationships in my life. My mom used to have these men around when I was little. They'd treat her like crap and she let them. They’d yell at her, grab her without her consent, some of them even hit her.’

Hope sighed as she listened; in comparison, she’d lived a charmed life.

‘The only loving relationship I’ve ever really seen is your parents’ Caitlin continued. ‘And you and Cam, of course. But before I moved in here, I didn't even know you could love someone the way Sara and Mr. C love each other.’

She turned to face Hope. ‘You know, I used to think they were faking it. I kept waiting for them to trip up, for one or the other to say or do something hurtful or mean or disrespectful. And the first time they argued and your mom got mad at your dad about something - I can’t even remember what it was now - he was sitting at the kitchen table and he made his way to the counter where your mom was standing. He got this really mischievous look in his eyes. I thought Sara was going to belt him but she just ignored him, trying to be coy while he stood there, hovering behind her. Then he ran his hand down her back, sort of like he was testing the waters to see what her response would be and she sort of shoved him playfully with her hips telling him to back off. But I could see she wasn’t all that angry.’

Hope chuckled at the recounting of an incident she couldn't recall yet could very well imagine - it was like dozens of other little encounters between her parents over the years.

‘Let me guess’ she said. ‘Mom started to squirm and Dad put his arms around her and started tickling her and nibbling at her neck?’

‘Her ear, actually. And Sara pretended to push him away but she was laughing and she kept saying: ‘Neeeaaaal! Stop it!’’ Caitlin said, imitating Sara’s voice.

Hope laughed as Caitlin continued. ‘Like ‘stop, don’t stop’ kinda thing and he just kept on nibbling and the next thing I knew, they were both giggling like a couple of teenagers and I was sitting there watching, like, what the hell just happened?’

‘That’s usually how it goes. Mom’s got a short fuse and Dad seems to be the only one who knows how to placate her. But believe me, they’ve had a couple of real doozies over the years. When I was about sixteen, Dad and Uncle Peter decided to go looking for Auntie Em. Mom hadn't seen her since she was a kid because… anyway, that’s another story for another day. Dad wanted to surprise her but he knew damn well Mom didn't want him to go looking. She was furious when she found out. She didn’t talk to him for days but now of course, she’s ecstatic about how things turned out.’

‘Dad’s more of a brooder than an exploder. When he gets mad, he usually gets quiet and pouts for a while. But I can remember one time when he really lost it. It was just before you moved in, Mom got it in her head that it would be good for him to make peace with his mom. Dad had told her plenty of times he wasn't interested but… well, you know my mom, she went to St. Louis to see her behind his back. He was livid. He shouted at her and stormed out of the house. I guess it’s normal to have disagreements in life as long as you work things out. Mom and Dad always forgive each other, no matter what.’

Caitlin nodded but her face grew dark. ‘After your accident, when your dad started drinking, I got really scared. Up until that point, I thought Mr C was perfect, the perfect husband, the perfect dad, the perfect teacher… But when he started to fall apart, I could see how much your mom was hurting and how terrified she was and I started to worry they’d never be able to work it out and that things would never be the same again. It was kind of scary.’

‘Well, that was a horrible year for the whole family’ Hope agreed wistfully. ‘I think we were all scared Dad wouldn’t get himself together and that we might lose him for good. And I was afraid I’d never get my life back on track and that Cam would get tired of waiting.’

‘But he didn’t’ Caitlin declared. ‘And you’re all better now.’

Hope cleared her throat. ‘All better’ was a very relative term. She still struggled with her speech, she still had that nagging pain in her leg whenever the weather turned bad, she’d always have those tiny little scars on her face to remind her of every single one of her surgeries and she’d live the rest of her life knowing just how fragile happiness can be and how you can be robbed of everything you cherish in the blink of an eye.

‘I had to give up on my dream of going to university’ she admitted, her voice quiet. ‘But I’ve got so much to be thankful for, Mom, Dad, Liam… you.’

Caitlin smiled. ‘And you’re getting married in a couple of months to a pretty terrific guy.’

Hope’s gaze softened as her mind wandered to Cameron Armstrong, the amazing young man who’d stood by her through all the turmoil of the past four years.

‘That reminds me’ she said, looking Caitlin in the eye. ‘Olivia is going to be my maid of honour but I was wondering… if you would like to be one of my bridesmaids.’

There was a gasp in the quiet room. ‘Me? You want me to be one of your bridesmaids?’

Hope nodded and smiled. ‘Yeah, you and Cam’s sister, Becky. It’s going to be a small wedding but I’d really like to have the two of you in the wedding party.’

Caitlin threw her arms around Hope’s neck in a hug that, if they hadn't been lying down, would surely have knocked Hope off her feet.

‘Yes, yes of course! Wow! A bridesmaid! I’ve never been a bridesmaid. What do I have to do?’

Hope chuckled. ‘Nothing silly! We’ll choose some dresses together and you can stand at the altar with me and Olivia and Becky. You’ll like her, she’s really nice.’

‘Okay’ Caitlin said breathlessly as she slipped her arm in Hope’s and lay her head against her shoulder.

‘You can be so silly sometimes’ Hope laughed in response to her foster sister’s over the top reaction.

Caitlin grew quiet, emotions getting the better of her. ‘I’ve never had a real family before’ she said, her voice tight.

Hope brought her hand to rest over Caitlin’s arm and squeezed. 

‘You do now.’

WCWCWC

Sara didn’t remember ever setting foot in the small multi-purpose cubicle located a few feet from the nursing station on the fourth floor. In all her visits to the Blue Skies Nursing Home, she’d never even noticed the small room. Neal had been the one to meet with the nursing staff when his mom had first been admitted and he recalled the small utility room that wasn’t much bigger than a broom closet. Inside, two chairs, a minuscule desk with another chair behind it with just enough space for someone with the impressive girth of a man like Dr. Garth Pearson to squeeze in behind.

The Caffreys followed him inside the small space, Sara leading the way. Neal hadn’t let go of her hand since she’d first walked in but he loosened his grip momentarily so she could manoeuvre into the tight space only to reach for it again the moment they took their seats and the door closed behind them.

Sara barely recognized her husband’s voice when he spoke - or rather croaked. ‘How is she?’

‘She’s resting comfortably for the moment. I gave her something to ease her breathing and she managed to get to sleep’ the older man said soberly. 

‘So, what’s happening - exactly?’ Sara’s quiet voice.

‘Mrs. Bennett is having a flare-up of the pneumonia that’s been plaguing her since before the holidays. Her lungs were already compromised and the infection seems to have returned with a vengeance.’

Neal nodded, not wanting to interrupt the doctor.

‘With every flare-up, your mother’s lung function deteriorates further and is unable to return to its previous level of functioning which means every time she manages to make a come-back, she’s weaker than before.’

Neal waited for the inevitable words.

‘I’m afraid at this point, it’s just a matter of time.’

Neal felt Sara’s hand squeezing his. ‘How much… time?’

‘That depends on how we intervene’ the man explained. ‘But… it’s a matter of weeks, maybe days.’

Sara heard a whoosh of air escape Neal’s lips.

‘As you know, your mother has asked that we not… treat her aggressively. Our only focus at this point is to keep her comfortable, make certain she’s not suffering in any way. We can use oxygen, a nebulizer… but eventually, her breathing will become so laboured that she’ll start to fade.’

‘What happens then?’ Sara asked.

‘Without enough oxygen, her organs will slowly start to shut down one by one. We can give her some morphine, keep her comfortable. But by then she’ll no longer be conscious and she’s made it clear she doesn't want her life prolonged by extraordinary measures.’

Neal let out a choked sound, like a whimper and Sara took her hand out of his and brought it to rest on his back, rubbing gently.

‘Can’t you feed her… intravenously?’ he asked.

The man looked kindly at Neal, shrugging. ‘I think you need to discuss that with your mother. She’s made it clear to me that when it gets to that point, she doesn’t want anything - not even fluids. That’s when things will start to go downhill rapidly - a couple of days, hours really.’

Neal stared in silence.

‘Despite the fact that she’s having difficulty breathing, she’s perfectly lucid at the moment. I have no reason to believe she’s not of sound mind. As her physician, I need to respect her wishes.’

Neal nodded and felt Sara’s hand returning to his, squeezing gently.

‘She’s made that clear to us as well and she told us about that… document she signed’ Sara said.

‘Yes, we call it a living will and your mom has signed it. She reminded me of that when I was examining her a few minutes ago’ Dr. Pearson explained. ‘For the time being, she’s not refusing to eat or drink but we need to prepare for the moment when she might.’ 

Neal swallowed before speaking. ‘What can we do… what can you do so she doesn't suffer?’

‘Well, we can keep her on oxygen and administer some medication to help her breathe using a nebulizer. But she’ll begin to fade and if she doesn't get any sustenance…. well, at some point, we’ll have to start her on morphine to ease the discomfort. At that point, she’ll no longer be conscious and without liquids…’

Sara looked over at Neal, his face crumpling at the news he’d just heard. 

‘Should we… do we need to be here with her 24/7?’ Sara asked.

‘That’s up to you but I would say it’s too early for that. She could live another couple of weeks and you need to conserve your energy in the meantime. When she starts to really go downhill… well, that’s when families often decide to remain nearby, maybe take turns to be with her.’

‘Is she sleeping right now?’ Neal asked.

‘She was dozing when I left her but if you want to go in and spend a few minutes, you’re welcome to do so. You should let her get as much sleep as possible before the meds wear off and she starts to have trouble breathing again. I don’t see it doing much good for you to be staying overnight just to watch her sleep. Perhaps you can plan more frequent, shorter visits over the next few days, help with feeding her, keep her company while she’s awake. In the meantime, the staff will make sure she’s comfortable.’

Neal turned to look at Sara. ‘I want to stay’ he said, his eyes pleading like a little boy asking his mom to buy that candy bar at the grocery store check-out.

Sara gave a head nod towards the door. ‘We’ll talk about it’ she replied, patting his hand.

‘No, I want to stay’ he repeated adamantly.

‘We’ve propped her up with some pillows so she can breathe more easily while she sleeps. You might notice she’s more frequently out of breath, even just talking or eating might bring on a coughing fit. That’s normal. Oh, and a small hand-held fan might help with her breathing too, they have one at the nursing station. Just keep her calm and take your cue from her. The nursing staff is going to put in a catheter in the morning so we don’t have to jostle her by changing diapers and the like…’

Neal sighed as he heard the painful details. 

‘You might notice some swelling in her legs and stomach, that’s caused by reduced lung function… it causes low oxygen in blood and fluid retention.’

Sara nodded; Neal seemed to have momentarily checked out of the conversation.

‘She’s been surprisingly optimistic thus far but be prepared for some anxiety, perhaps even depression. Try to keep visitors to one or two at a time so she can get plenty of rest. If Mrs. Bennett likes music, you could have some playing in her room or perhaps you could read to her.’

Sara nodded in understanding. ‘She likes jazz’ she smiled.

‘How will we know when… it’s the end?’ Neal asked, coming out of his stupor.

‘She’ll become less and less aware of her surroundings and she’ll have prolonged bouts of unconsciousness. After a while, she’ll no longer be responsive to people or sounds around her - although many experts say that dying patients can hear what’s going on around them until the very end.’

‘After that, when the end is near, you’ll notice a change in her breathing patterns, longer and longer pauses between breaths. You might think she’s passed away but she could continue to breathe intermittently for a while longer. Her breathing might become noisy because of the phlegm she’ll be unable to cough, you might notice her skin colour changing, her skin feeling cooler. There might be some involuntary twitches before she passes but that doesn't mean she’s in any distress or discomfort, it’s just the body reacting to…’

To the silence in the room, the man continued. ‘I’m sorry’ he said. ‘It’s going to be a rough few days and weeks for you and your family but rest assured Mrs. Bennett will get the best possible care from the staff. Of course, you always have the option of moving her to a hospital if that’s what you'd like to do—’

‘No, no!’ Neal interrupted, his voice adamant. ‘We don’t want her moved to a hospital. This is her home. She wants to be here.’

‘Well, I’m on call twenty-four hours a day and I’ll be checking in on your mom, morning and night. The staff will call me if anything comes up.’

Neal nodded and got to his feet, putting out his hand. ‘Thank you doctor’ he said.

‘The entire staff is here for you Mr. and Mrs. Caffrey’ Dr. Pearson reminded them.

Sara nodded at the man and got to her feet, Neal’s hand latched on to hers like a lifeline. They were embarking on a difficult voyage but implicitly, they knew they had each other’s backs - as they always did. 

WCWCWC

Sara felt something cool and slick under her bare foot and reached out for the overhead light switch in her bedroom, her mouth dropping as she glanced down at her feet.

‘What the hell…’ she mumbled as she spotted the rose petal she’d almost slipped on. 

She looked up at the ceiling, hundreds of small lights illuminating the bedroom against a background of beautiful gauzy material. It took but a moment for her to figure out what was going on. Despite his anger and frustration, it seemed her romantic husband had enlisted some helpers and had gone the full nine yards in order to wrap up their special evening with a magical night of romance. 

Her thoughts turned to Neal who was still in New Rochelle. He’d been unwilling to leave his mother’s side and Sara could sense he wanted some time alone with her. Following their meeting with Dr. Pearson, the two of them had gone in to sit with Linda as she slept peacefully. After a while, Neal had suggested Sara head on home and get some rest. 

‘Take the car’ he’d said, insistently. ‘I’ll follow in a little while.’

‘But I don’t want you to be alone.’

‘I’m not alone’ he’d argued. ‘I just want to sit with my mom for a bit. I promise I’ll head home no later than midnight.’

And so, Sara had taken the keys from his hand, had kissed her mother-in-law’s cool forehead and had driven the short distance to White Plains only to find the house eerily quiet, the kids already in bed — although, to her surprise, not in their own beds. 

That had been her first hint that something special was scheduled to happen on the second floor. Now that the bedroom was fully illuminated with dozens of sparkling fairy lights, she could see that Neal had planned a romantic tête-à-tête without their offspring nearby. He’d been talking about a romantic night for the past week and a half, eager to resume their long neglected love life. 

Sara chuckled at the sight of the rose petals strewn all over the bed, a trail leading all the way to the door. Leave it to Neal to go all out. She spied a large box on the bed, wrapped up in beautiful silver paper with a luxurious red silk bow. 

‘Oh Neal!’ she exclaimed under her breath.

She sat on the edge of the bed and ran her fingers languidly over the wrapped package, wondering what surprise lay within. Leave it to him to make some grand romantic gesture. She, on the other hand, hadn’t gotten him much, just a new set of cufflinks and a tie bar she thought he’d like. Hopefully, he hadn't gone overboard.

Her thoughts wandered to the thank you gift from Randy Piper - the object which had caused so much turmoil for them over the past few hours. She needed to let Neal know she had no interest in keeping the damn thing. It meant nothing compared to the unfailing support and undying love Neal gave her every single day of their lives. 

They needed to talk things out as soon as possible so they could get things back on track. Neal needed her now more than ever and this was no time for petty arguments and recriminations. Sure, he’d gone and stuck his nose where it didn't belong, sneaking around behind her back but that was who Neal was: astute, inquisitive, impulsive, brilliant. He was the same guy who had just created an enchanted fairy tale right in their modest bedroom and who’d been planning on sweeping her off her feet.

She heard her stomach grumble and placed her hand on her ribcage; with all that had transpired, they had never made it to dinner before everything had gone FUBAR. She thought of the doggie bag she’d brought in from the car and the wonderful aromas that had filled her nostrils on the drive home. She’d barely touched her meal and now, the thought of the halibut she’d ordered was enough to make her salivate. If she was hungry, it stood to reason Neal would be starved by the time he got back. 

It might not be the romantic celebration they’d envisioned but maybe she could still surprise him with a midnight snack before they finally hit the sack. With that in mind, she headed back downstairs to see what magic of her own she could create.

WCWCWC

The glow from the hallway light softly illuminated Linda Bennett’s room - just enough for Neal to see his mom’s peaceful form on the bed. He left the door ajar and made his way back to the chair he’d vacated a few minutes earlier when he’d momentarily left to walk Sara out. He’d insisted on walking her all the way to the car, promising to be home by midnight before making his way back up to the fourth floor. 

Within seconds, his eyes grew accustomed to the semi-darkness and he settled in, careful not to disturb his mom’s slumber. She looked surprisingly calm and serene, no visible signs of distress on her face. The oxygen cannula, which had been a permanent fixture for the last couple of years, hung from her nose and he could hear the soft whirring sound of the oxygen tank tucked right by her bed. Everything in the room looked as it always did; no outward signs that Linda Bennett would soon be embarking on a final, irrevocable journey.

‘Hey Mom’ he whispered softly. ‘I’m back. I just wanted to walk Sara to the car, make sure she was safe.’

He let out a choked laugh. ‘Although, to be honest, I’m more worried about the other drivers when she’s out on the roads.’

The oxygen tank whistled softly as he spoke. ‘It’s Valentine’s Day and we went out for a nice dinner…’

He let out a tired sigh. ‘Who am I kidding? Sara and I had a huge fight at the restaurant. I’ve been acting like a jerk over this Randall Piper guy and I got jealous because he gave her a present. Well, not just any present. Something really expensive and I still don’t understand why she didn't just tell me about it. Usually, Sara and I tell each other everything - well, almost everything. Sometimes we don’t share stuff about work, especially her job, and I get it, I really do. But this was different and I feel like she purposefully kept this from me.’

He gazed down at Linda’s hands, resting on her chest and rising rhythmically in response to her breathing.

‘I guess I’m worried she might have feelings for this guy. I know I’m being silly but I can’t help the way I feel… Anyway, I had planned a special evening for us, dinner, dancing, romance, you know… but we never made it past the appetizers.’

He prattled on mindlessly, surely avoidance behaviour so he didn't have to focus on what the doctor had just shared with him and Sara. Truth was, he wasn't ready to let his mother go. He would never be ready to let her go. 

‘I messed up… again. But Mom, she makes me crazy. She’s stubborn and argumentative and headstrong and… she’s a lousy cook. But I love her with every fibre of my being. I love everything about her and I hate it when we argue.’

He studied Linda’s face, calm and relaxed. ‘You always give good advice Mom’ he said, suddenly getting choked up. ‘What should I do? How do I make this all better?’

Linda lay immobile, her body limp, her jaw slackened. ‘I know what you’d say if you were awake. You’d say ‘Don’t sit around here watching me sleep. Go home and make things right with your wife.’’

He cleared his throat. ‘I will Mom. We’ll talk things through and I know we’ll find a way to work it out. We always do.’

Silence resumed as Neal studied his mother’s frail form on the bed — the woman he had spent so many years being angry with, the one person he blamed for all the difficulties he’d encountered in his youth. It had taken him a long time to realize that his mother wasn't to blame for the poor decisions he'd made. Why couldn't he have forgiven her ten years ago, twenty years ago, thirty years ago? Why had he lived most of his life bitter and angry at this woman who had tried her best but, sadly, had fallen short at being a parent. 

Since they’d reunited, she’d more than made up for her shortcomings despite her fragile state. She’d been a rock for Neal when Hope had gotten injured and she’d helped him through one of the most difficult periods of his life.

He brought his hand to rest on hers, her skin thin and translucent. 

‘I’m just going to sit here a few minutes longer, okay?’ he whispered. ‘You just rest and let me take care of everything.’

TBC


	48. Chapter 48

_Liam woke to a pair of strong arms snaking around his waist. He let out a sleepy groan. The hands were forceful and robust and they felt amazing as they lingered down his side, cupping his ass and squeezing emphatically. Suddenly, there was a pair of soft lips pressed up against his neck and a tongue… a tongue exploring the shell of his outer ear._

_'Hey lover’ the breathless voice murmured._

_The hand continued its exploration and Liam flipped onto his back in order to give the other man better access to his renewed arousal._

_His eyes fluttered open, landing on Todd’s face smiling devilishly back at him._

_‘Well hello there. I see you’re_ up’ _Todd said mischievously._

_‘Mmmm’ Liam cooed in response to a particularly intimate manoeuvre carried out by the other man’s expert hands. ‘That feels nice.’_

_They were lying on top of crumpled sheets following an athletic lovemaking session and Liam could feel his body relaxed and content._

_‘You’re insatiable’ Liam murmured, reacting to Todd’s machinations._

_Liam felt conflicted although he couldn't pinpoint the reason why. Every cell in his body was tingling, he felt alive and whatever was bothering him was momentarily pushed aside to make room for the amazing sensations he felt from the top of his head to the tip of his toes._

_He heard a soft dinging sound and frowned. Since when did he have a doorbell on his dorm room door?_

_He sat up expectantly as the door opened._

_Cody Miller stood there, a bottle of wine in one hand and a bag of take-out food in the other._

_‘Liam… I thought I’d surprise you —‘ Cody began._

_He stopped suddenly as he spotted the two men, their bodies entangled on the disheveled sheets._

_Liam tried without success to disentangle himself from Todd. He stared ahead, shocked to see Cody standing there._

_‘Cody! No! It’s not what you think!’_

_But before he could pull himself away from Todd, Cody was gone._

WCWCWC

Neal’s overactive mind alternated between images of his mother and his wife as he stared out the car window. The snow had stopped, leaving the roads with a light dusting of virginal white and making everything look clean and simple - very unlike his state of mind at the moment which could only be described as cluttered and chaotic.

He glanced up at the cab driver, grateful the man wasn’t one of those talkative types who insisted on chatting you up about anything from the latest hockey scores to the current state of the stock market. Neal was usually a master at making small talk but on this night, he was appreciative of the silence, giving his imagination free rein as thoughts and images competed for attention in his muddled mind.

His mother hadn't moved an inch the whole time he’d sat by her side - and that was probably a blessing in disguise. At least, she wasn't coughing or struggling with her breathing as she had been during his visit the previous day. He’d simply held her hand in the quiet room, feeling the need to comfort her - or was it _his_ need to be comforted, he couldn't be sure.

Thoughts of his beloved June surfaced, unbidden. The hours leading up to her death had been painful for Neal and the rest of the Ellington clan. Although she had lived to a ripe old age, Neal had not been ready to let her go. She’d been an anchor for him ever since that fateful day they’d met in the little thrift shop in Manhattan and he’d been afraid her absence might cause him to feel lost and unmoored.

Fate had been doubly cruel that day. Mere hours after June had passed away, Neal had been shot, his raw grief rudely interrupted by a gun-toting thief who’d broken into the gallery on a quest for vengeance. Looking back, he realized his grief for June had been mitigated by his own personal struggles as he’d fought to get back on his feet - literally and figuratively. Thankfully, his heartache following her departure had been channelled into something positive as he’d focussed on plans for the opening of the June Ellington School of Art, Neal’s loving tribute to his surrogate mother.

To her immense credit, Sara hadn't batted an eye when he’d suggested they take the considerable inheritance he’d received from June’s estate to open an art school for underprivileged youth. She’d known from the get-go that Neal needed an outlet for his grief and that he needed to honour the woman who had been such a positive influence in his life. 

Contrary to June Ellington, Linda Bennett would be leaving nothing but debt behind when she finally left this earth - certainly as it pertained to physical belongings.And yet, like June, she would also be leaving behind an important legacy — one of resilience and courage.

Unlike June who had lived a comfortable life surrounded by family and friends, Linda had struggled to survive her whole life. After Neal’s dad had been carted off to jail, she’d been tainted with shame for what he’d done. Getting whisked off into WitSec away from everything that was familiar had been her undoing, leaving her shattered and alone to raise a son who was a constant reminder of the man who had betrayed her.

Linda had cheated death on so many occasions - using, then abusing drugs and alcohol in an attempt to escape what she’d deemed to be too painful a reality. This time, however, it appeared she would not escape death’s claws, at least if the doctors were to be believed.

Neal reflected on his rocky relationship with his mom. His early years yielded no real memories, just a vague sense that they’d been happy once: he, his mom and his dad. But his earliest discernible memories where of shame and embarrassment for a mother who had left behind all self-respect and thrown herself in the clutches of mind-numbing substances in order to survive. His disgust had grown to anger and when he’d walked away from her, he had convinced himself he hated her and had resolved to never lay eyes on her again.

Looking back now, the only memories he wanted to hang onto as far as his mom was concerned were the most recent ones, the wonderful memories they’d created since she’d come back into his life. Again, his amazingly insightful wife had been the key to liberating him from all the acrimony and anger he’d felt towards his mother, making way for a reconciliation he could never have possibly imagined.

Thank God for Sara.

How did she always know what he needed even before he did? When he got home, he needed to apologize for his most recent behaviour. When had he grown so suspicious of her? She had never given him any reason to doubt her and yet he’d acted like an insecure fool, latching on to her as if she were some sort of possession.

‘Sir, did you say Meadowbrook Street?’ the driver asked, pulling Neal away from his thoughts.

He glanced around the familiar neighbourhood. ‘Yeah, yeah’ he murmured. ‘Home.’

WCWCWC

A few feet away from the family room where Liam lay sleeping, Sara was busy pulling out the reheated contents of the doggie bag from the microwave. She glanced over in her son’s direction, reacting to the sound of his voice. She’d been trying to move around the kitchen stealthily, not wanting to wake him from what appeared to be a restless slumber. He’d been talking in his sleep for the past few minutes, mumbling and moaning and she could have sworn she’d just heard him call out Cody’s name.

She checked the time on the clock over the stove: five minutes past midnight. Neal was nothing if not punctual and, having not heard otherwise from him, she knew he would be walking through that door any minute. Using the food they’d left uneaten at Babbo’s, she’d done her best to prepare a modest midnight feast for her valentine, something they could both enjoy upstairs in their bedroom. The peach cider was already chilling in the ice bucket upstairs and she’d put out a picnic blanket under the stars, a small touch of whimsy on an otherwise grim night.

They had much to discuss. They needed to clear the air — but perhaps that was a little too ambitious considering the turbulent events of the last few hours. When he finally made it home, Neal would have a lot on his mind - a lot more than an expensive piece of jewelry. Then again, Sara knew all too well it wasn't really about the cameo, it never had been. It was about Neal’s current insecurities about getting older, about the state of their relationship, about being made to stand by and watch while she fawned over a former boyfriend without regard for how that might make him feel.

She needed to set him straight and make things right.

She arranged the dinner plates on a large tray and tucked in some cloth napkins she’d pulled out from the dining room hutch. She’d used the good dishes - the ones they usually saved for company - and she’d polished up some of the silverware she kept in the beautiful vintage wooden case Neal had given her for their fifth wedding anniversary. It was a small gesture but she wanted him to know she appreciated all the effort he’d gone to in order to make this a special night.

She looked down at the plate of food; frankly, she didn’t care if he only took a bite or two and went right to sleep. It had been an exhausting night but she didn't want them going to bed like this - with angry words and recriminations between them.

She would definitely try to coax him into eating a little before turning in, though. He was hurting right now and her job was to support him through the next few days and weeks, make sure he ate properly, got enough rest and didn't overexert himself. It wouldn’t be easy; Neal didn't hold back when it came to those he loved and when he was stressed out, he often neglected to take care of himself.

Right on cue, she heard the muffled sound of a car door slamming in the distance and she nervously smoothed down the pretty cotton nightie she’d slipped into - another gift from Neal back when she’d first gotten pregnant with Liam.

She heard the key in the doorknob despite the fact she’d left the door unlatched for him and she held her breath as the door opened. When he came into view, he looked totally done in as if he’d followed up a night of partying with an aerobics class and had topped everything off with a jog around the block for good measure.

‘Hey’ he called out quietly out as he slipped out of his coat.

He was suddenly aware of a pleasant yet unexpected aroma - considering it was past midnight.

‘What smells so good?’ he asked, stepping into the kitchen.

Sara brought her finger to her lips. ‘Shhh’ she murmured pointing in the direction of Liam who was sound asleep on the hide-a-bed in the family room.

‘What’s he doing down here?’ Neal whispered.

‘I think the kids thought we’d like some privacy. And from what I saw in our bedroom, so did you.’

Neal frowned, not catching her drift for a moment before remembering the little surprise he’d enlisted the kids’ help in preparing. It seemed like ages ago. He walked over to the tray she’d prepared and gave her a questioning look as he snatched a piece of pancetta from his plate of tagliatelle.

‘What’s all this?’

‘I figured you'd be hungry since we never got around to having dinner.’

Neal smiled weakly and nodded. ‘I am, actually’ he said, quietly pulling out a kitchen chair and preparing to take a seat.

‘Uh, uh. Not here’ Sara whispered as she picked up the tray. ‘Follow me.’

WCWCWC

As far as midnight snacks went, this one was pretty well over the top. Neal was surprised at how great the room looked and he was further pleased to see that Sara had spread out a picnic blanket on top of their duvet and set out some candles nearby. She’d even put out the peach cider he had bought in the sterling silver ice bucket they kept for special occasions. They ate as Neal shared what had happened after Sara had left - nothing much, really. Sara was surprised to see him dig into his meal with enthusiasm despite the dire circumstances and by the time they got to dessert, they were discussing the fallout from the news they’d just gotten from the doctor.

‘Honey, we have to tell the kids, first thing tomorrow.’

Sara was right, they needed to be told. ‘I’m especially worried about Caitlin’s reaction. She’s going to be so upset’ Neal said.

Sara pursed her lips as she thought of their foster daughter and her particularly close relationship with Neal’s mom.

‘We’ll just have to help her through it’ she said, hand on Neal’s arm.

‘Is Hope home?’ he asked.

She nodded. ’She and Caitlin are sound asleep up in her room.’

She looked around the room again, taking in all the little romantic touches. ‘I guess they all thought we’d need some privacy when we got back.’

Neal scoffed; at the moment, romance was the furthest thing from his mind. Sara gazed up at the dozens of twinkling lights above her head and picked up a rose petal, stroking it lovingly with the tips of her fingers.

‘This is all so beautiful, Neal’ she said, pointing to the stars above their heads. ‘Thank you.’

He smiled shyly. ‘Well, when I asked the kids to set it up for us, I didn’t know we’d be having the fight of the century.’

Sara shook her head. ‘Don’t you think you’re exaggerating just a little. We had a disagreement, that’s all.’

Neal chuckled. ‘Is that what we’re calling it?’ he asked wryly. He stopped for a moment, looking into his wife’s eyes. ‘Babe, we need to…’

‘…talk’ Sara said, completing his sentence. ‘I know.’

‘I don’t want to leave things the way we left them at the restaurant.’

‘You’re right…I’m sorry Neal. I shouldn't have walked out on you like that.’

Neal chuckled. ‘I’ll give you that, it was quite the dramatic exit. I think the people around us thought you’d broken up with me. Everybody kept giving me sympathetic nods on my way out. One guy tapped me on the back and told me there were plenty of other fish in the sea. The waiter even threw in an order of tiramisu as a consolation prize.’

‘I saw that’ Sara said with a smile. ‘Neal, this is ridiculous.’

She took in a deep breath and collected their plates, placing them on the nearby dresser. She returned to the bed, sitting across from him and tucking her legs underneath her.

‘This whole thing with Randall… honey, it’s gotten way out of hand.’

Neal’s face darkened. ‘You’re not kidding. Do you really think you should be accepting a gift like that from this guy?’

‘No. No, I don’t. I guess I just got a little starry-eyed and… well, I have to admit it’s been a little… destabilizing being around all this loot he’s got.’

‘Is that all it is? His loot?’

‘What do you mean?’

Neal looked down at the blanket, mindlessly running his hand over the plaid design. He forced himself to look up at her, getting to the crux of the matter. ‘Sara, do you… do you still have feelings for this guy?’

He was expecting a vigorous denial but instead Sara sighed. ‘I can’t pretend I haven't been flattered by all the attention he's been giving me’ she admitted, more honestly than Neal expected.

‘Things have been a little… off with us lately with your…’ she pointed to his groin ‘… you know with the meds. And you’ve been acting so weird with the hair and everything. I’m not used to seeing you feeling so insecure.’

Neal listened, intent on not reigniting their little tiff.

‘But I love you Neal. Even when you’re acting all weird and macho. I love you. There’s nothing this man could possibly give me that I haven't already found with you.’

Neal looked on, somewhat skeptical. ‘I’m sorry I went snooping through your stuff. I know how much you hate that. It’s just that…’

‘You know what I was about to tell you just before I left the restaurant?’ she asked as he shook his head.

‘I was going to tell you that I can’t keep that thing. I know that. It’s totally inappropriate. I decided I was going to give it back first chance I got. I even told Elizabeth that this afternoon.’

‘You told Elizabeth?’ Neal asked accusingly.

She shrugged. ‘I had to tell someone and I couldn't talk to you about it with you feeling all weirded out about this guy.’

Sara continued. ‘Honey, I know you still think about all the things you could have had if you’d kept… living the life you were living. I know it’s still hard after all these years and I know you gave it up for me, for Hope and for Liam.’

‘No, I didn’t!’ he interrupted emphatically. ‘Sara, I gave it up for _me_. For a chance to be happy and most days, I don’t have any regrets but…’

‘But you wonder sometimes what life would have been like if you hadn't given it up?’

‘Sometimes…’ he grudgingly admitted. ‘But not for the reason you think. Sara, I just want to give you the world… I want to give you everything your heart desires.’

‘Oh Neal, you already do. Every day, I look at you and I realize how difficult it must have been for you to give everything up for us.’

‘You’re wrong honey. It was never hard to give it up. I just want to make _you_ happy.’

‘You already do, you big goof’ she said affectionately. She ran her hand through Neal’s hair and let out a muffled laugh.

‘What?’ he asked, puzzled by her reaction.

‘A grey hair’ she replied with a chuckle as she caressed his hair. ‘A perfect grey hair, just as it was meant to be. Just as _you_ were meant to be Caffrey.’

She leaned in and placed a kiss on his lips as the tension finally began to dissipate between them.

‘Now are you going to tell me what’s in that package?’ she asked with a head nod towards the box that lay nearby. ‘You know how much I love surprises.’

Neal got to his feet to retrieve the large box and he set it in front of her on the bed.

‘It’s not a cameo. Not even a knock-off’ he warned as she laughed.

Sara’s face brightened as she proceeded to open the gift. ‘Now, you’re not going to tell me you wrapped this by yourself’ she said, knowing his disdain - and lack of talent - for gift wrapping.

‘Guilty’ he admitted, taking pleasure in watching her unwrap the package. ‘Hope did it for me.’

He lived for moments like this - those moments when Sara’s eyes grew wide and her face became illuminated in response to one of his little surprises.

‘Oh, Neal! It’s beautiful’ she said, pulling out a gorgeous silk kimono in shades of royal blue and magenta.

She held it up against herself and watched Neal’s face light up.

‘That colour is perfect on you’ he said, pointing to the box. ‘There’s something else in there.’

Sara frowned and removed the tissue paper. She laughed heartily at the sight of her old ratty chenille bathrobe looking better than it had in a long time.

‘I hemmed it for you and I mended the little holes’ he said. ‘Oh, and I washed it, it had a really nasty coffee stain on it. Had to wash it twice.’

Sara giggled and held it up to examine it. ‘Neal! But you hate this thing.’

He shrugged. ‘I guess it’s my way of saying that I want you to be the best you can be…’ he said, pointing to the new silk robe. He moved it away and let his fingers linger on the chenille bathrobe underneath ‘…but I love you just the way you are.’

Sara could feel a lump forming in her throat at the words he’d spoken. He kept gazing at her, his eyes full of love.

‘That’s what love is, isn’t it?’ he added with a wink.

She nodded and threw her arms around his neck, watching as he winced in discomfort.

‘I got you a little something too’ she said. She sprung to her feet and opened her chest of drawers, pulling out a small gift-wrapped box. ‘It’s a pair of cufflinks and a tie bar to go with your new shirt.’

He let his head fall to one side, eyebrows rising in response. ‘Way to keep the mystery alive there Repo’ he teased as he opened the gift.

‘I love it’ he said, leaning in to kiss her. ‘Happy Valentine’s Day sweetheart.’

He ran his hand along his neck once more in reaction to the tension which had apparently been building up there.

‘Here’ Sara said, putting her arms out and inviting him to slip out of his shirt. ‘One last present… let me see if I can do something about that crick in your neck.’

He let her help him out of his shirt and undershirt and watched as she removed the last of the dishes and the picnic blanket from the bed, placing everything on the nearby dresser.

‘Come on’ she said, smoothing the duvet. ‘Lie down and let me help you with that.

It was an offer he couldn't refuse. He and Sara had taken a couples’ massage class a few years back and to Neal’s delight, he’d discovered his wife had a real knack for giving relaxing back rubs. He smiled wanly and did as he was told, lying flat on his stomach, his face planted firmly in his pillow.

He let out a sigh, his tired eyes closing. 

Sara reached in the bedside table for the massage oil she kept there. ‘Eucalyptus or lavender?’ she asked.

He lifted his face off the pillow for a brief instant, just long enough to utter a reply. ‘Ladies choice’ he murmured.

‘Better take these off or you’ll get oil all over them’ she said, reaching around his waist in search of his belt buckle. Neal’s hand was already there and within seconds he’d pulled off his pants, throwing them on the chair by the bed and returning to the prone position in nothing but his silk boxers.

Sara straddled his hips and poured a small amount of lavender oil - he knew she’d choose lavender - into the palm of her hand and rubbed her hands together, filling the room with the soothing aroma. She began at the base of his back, pulling his boxers down slightly to get better access to his hips. She heard him sigh as she positioned one hand on his lower back and with her fingers pointing away from his spine, began to knead the tender skin. She placed her other hand on top of the first and used her body weight to push down slowly, pressing the heels of her hands into the muscle, away from his spine.

Neal’s breathing grew heavy as she slowly moved up with one hand on either side of his spine, rocking back and forth as she went. She could feel the tautness of his muscles as she worked.

‘Oh, honey. What have you gone and done to yourself?’

Neal moaned softly as he felt himself begin to relax under her expert touch.

She leaned forward to better reach his shoulders, the tips of her hair tickling his back as Neal giggled.

‘What?’ she asked.

‘Nothing. You hair… it tickles.’

Sara smiled and went to work on her husband’s shoulders, kneading the skin vigorously despite her relatively small, delicate hands. She worked in slow, even strokes, thumbs pressing down between his shoulder blades as Neal alternately moaned and groaned.

‘You okay?’ she asked.

‘Oh yeah…’ she thought she heard him groan although his voice was muffled.

Moving to his neck, she brought the palm of her hand to rest on the back of his head, creating light pressure with her thumb on one side and her fingers on the other. She proceeded to pull her hand toward the back of Neal’s neck while squeezing her thumb and fingers together around his neck muscles, just as she’d been taught.

‘You’re tighter than a drum’ she commented, continuing to run the palms of her hands against the back of his neck.

Neal mumbled something unintelligible but made no attempt to change positions. He could feel his body melting into the soft cushiony mattress.

She hit a particularly tender spot and Neal moaned louder this time, turning his head sideways so he could speak.

‘Awwww, honey. That feels amazing.

‘You know you’re going to have to let me take care of you, Caffrey. Things are going get rough over the next little while.’

He remained silent, unexpectedly feeling himself start to stir at the sound of Sara’s languid voice and the sensation of her hands on his body. He hadn't expected to react that way, considering everything that was happening around them but it was almost as if his mind had shut down, unable to take anymore stimuli, leaving him wrapped up in his body’s warm, sensual sensations.

He rolled his hips and Sara pulled away, allowing him space turn over and face her.

He flipped onto his back, staring up at her. God, she was beautiful, looking almost angelic in her white cotton nightie. Neal’s hands ran up and down her thighs as she gazed back at him, the starry lights from above framing her face.

‘Close your eyes honey. I’ll do your scalp’ she said.

‘I don’t want to close my eyes’ he complained. ‘I want to look at your beautiful face.’

She smiled demurely and rolled her eyes. ‘Why Neal Caffrey, always the charmer.’

The look in Neal’s eyes remained steady, his gaze unwavering. ‘I love you Repo’ he murmured tenderly.

She smiled back sweetly and Neal reached up for her, pulling her in for a kiss with an intense longing he hadn’t felt in weeks. He let his hands wander up to her face, moving to caress her hair and anchoring her in place as he continued kissing her.

‘I don’t know what I’d do without you’ he whispered once she’d pulled away.

‘Well, you’ll never have to find out Caffrey’ came her quiet response.

She leaned in to kiss him again and his arms wrapped tightly around her, capturing her in his grasp as if he never intended to let her go again.

‘Sweet, sweet Sara’ he whispered softly in her ear.

An unexpected, almost chaste desire began to rise in both of them - an overwhelming urge to feel connected, entwined, safe and sheltered from the pain and heartache of the world around them.

The lovemaking that followed was spontaneous and pure, nothing particularly lustful just a succession of gentle touches, loving whispers, warms sighs and knowing gazes as their bodies came together as one. Mouths, hands, arms and legs intertwined in a silent dance more intimate than anything their bodies had ever known.

When it was over they were almost instantly and blissfully asleep, their worries momentarily forgotten and the remnants of their impromptu midnight feast a few feet away as the stars lit up the sky above their heads.

TBC


	49. Chapter 49

Caitlin stared down at her scrambled eggs as if they’d grown arms and pushed them around her plate mindlessly. She’d barely said a word since Neal and Sara had given them the news about Linda. 

Of course, this moment had been inevitable. No one lived forever and Linda Bennett was no exception; as it was, she’d defied all odds and had clung to life much longer than anyone could have dared to hope for. 

When Caitlin had first moved into the house on Meadowbrook Street, she had hoped to connect with all the members of the Caffrey family but what she hadn't anticipated was the special friendship she’d eventually develop with the woman she now called ‘grandma’. 

In the beginning, Sara and the kids had done their best to welcome her into their home. Hope had been somewhat skeptical about her joining the family, considering that up to that point, Caitlin had been nothing but trouble for her dad, giving him grief at the school of art and going as far as falsely accusing him of sexual impropriety. But, over time, the wounds had healed and the two young women had settled into a mutually satisfying friendship, especially after Hope’s tragic accident which had put everything into perspective for both of them. 

As far as her relationship with Liam was concerned, there had been plenty of ups and downs over the years. Caitlin had treated him like crap, constantly teasing him and yet following him around like a lost puppy dog - that annoying push-pull dynamic that often dictated her outlandish behaviour. It was all just bluster though and what she’d really wanted all along was to get Liam to like her and invite her into his circle of friends. She was secretly relieved when he’d blown up at her in the garage that day a few months back. She deserved it and more and she could certainly understand Liam’s impulse to stand up for his dad. But when push came to shove, they were family and Caitlin had grown to love the handsome young man with the sparkling green eyes she considered a brother - certainly more worthy of that title than the scumbag who shared her genetic material. 

To Caitlin’s surprise, Sara Ellis had become an unexpected ally during the young woman’s journey to become a bonafide member of the Caffrey family. At first, Mr. C’s wife was everything Caitlin thought she could never be: beautiful, poised, self-assured, competent, a product of all the life advantages Caitlin would never know. Sara had appeared aloof and emotionally detached but with time, she had grown protective of Caitlin and had, on more than one occasion, acted as a buffer between the rebellious teen and her foster dad. Caitlin knew she could always turn to Sara for sound, no-nonsense advice and even though the trajectory of their lives could not have been more different, Sara seemed to understand and accept her in a way Neal never seemed able to do. 

Mr. C was something else altogether - he’d been the one responsible for bringing her into the fold despite her dogged efforts to push him away. He'd been her teacher before he’d been her foster dad and he had taken both roles very seriously, coaching the young woman and working hard to keep her from falling prey to the temptations he himself had been unable to resist in his younger life. She loved him; he was the closest thing to a dad she would ever know. But like any dad, he expected much of her: he demanded honesty and hard work and he wanted her to succeed where he himself had been unable to do so. Sometimes, Caitlin felt pressured and unequal to the task.

But above all else, and so unexpectedly, there’d been Linda Bennett. She was in a league of her own. Caitlin hadn't expected to have anything whatsoever in common with the elderly woman who had parachuted fortuitously into her life. When Neal had dragged the family out to St. Louis to meet his mom for the first time, all Caitlin had seen was a fragile old woman who had no idea what a teenager like herself was all about. 

She couldn't have been further from the truth. 

Whenever Caitlin sat with her grandmother, she could truly be herself - more so than with anyone else. There was never any judgement, never any pressure, no expectations that Caitlin had to live up to. There was just a friendly ear and a warm smile, words of encouragement and a steadfast expectation that Caitlin had it in her to do what was right, no matter the situation. 

Whenever she was in her grandmother’s presence, Caitlin felt free to be herself, warts and all, without fear of scrutiny or judgement. Linda’s unexpected arrival in her life had come at a time when the troubled teen had been searching for meaning in her life, a time when she’d been fighting her inner demons. She’d been surprised to find that despite their age difference, Linda understood what she was going through better than anyone and now, she couldn't imagine her life without her beloved adoptive grandmother. 

Caitlin picked a small bite off her plate and placed it in her mouth, chewing without enthusiasm as silence prevailed in the Caffrey kitchen.

Hope was the first to speak up. ‘We were supposed to meet up at Aunt Elizabeth’s place this afternoon to talk about the wedding’ she said, getting to her feet. ‘I’ll call her and reschedule.’

‘No, no, honey, don’t do that’ Neal said, his arm reaching out to hold her back. ‘We can’t all be with Grandma at the same time. We’re going to have to take turns… pace ourselves.’

‘I’d like to go today if that’s okay’ Liam said, looking over at his dad. ‘I have to go back on the five o’clock train to write that exam tomorrow morning… and I have a game tomorrow night.’

Neal nodded. ‘That’s a good idea buddy. I’m sure she’d like that. We’ll go together.’

‘Unless… do you think I should stay here? I could e-mail my professor and see if I can get an extension. Maybe he’ll let me write the exam next week.’

Again Neal spoke up, his voice strong. ‘No! You need to… carry on with your life. We all do.’

Sara brought her hand to rest on Caitlin’s back. She rubbed gently. ‘Dad and I were thinking we could take turns, make more frequent, shorter visits. We need to conserve our energy for the next little while.’

Neal nodded. ‘Nothing’s changed for the moment. Grandma’s eating and drinking and it’s hard to know what will happen… or when. She could be with us for another couple of weeks… we just don’t know.’

He looked up at the kids one a time, Caitlin’s eyes carefully avoiding his. 

‘Grandma would hate it if she thought we were all scrambling just so we could sit there and watch her sleep’ he attempted with a forced chuckle.

Sara stood and reached for a pad and pencil nearby, returning to join everyone at the kitchen table. 

‘Why don’t we all look at the coming week and see what our schedules are like?’ she suggested. ‘Neal?’

‘I’ve got a staff meeting on Wednesday morning I’d like to be at and a budget meeting on Thursday afternoon but otherwise, I can clear my schedule unless… what about that new commission that’s coming into the gallery this week?’ he added, looking at Hope.

‘We don’t need you for that, Dad. Cam’s on top of it.’ She turned to look at her mom. ‘I can take time off anytime except Friday. I’ve got that surgery but that’s just an outpatient thing.’ 

‘And I’m supposed to be doing that inventory in the Hamptons but I’m sure I could put that off for another week or two’ Sara added, jotting down a few notes.

‘Are you sure I shouldn’t stay home?’ Liam asked, looking at his dad. ‘What if she… what if she dies and I’m not here?’

Neal looked sadly at his son. ‘I suppose that could happen but chances are she’ll grow weaker with time and we’ll have some warning signs before… Maybe when it gets closer to the end, you’ll want to come home.’

‘Honey, what about you? You haven't said much’ Sara asked Caitlin.

She shrugged and didn't look up. ‘I just want to spend all the time I can with Grandma.’

‘What’s your schedule like at the café this week?’ Sara asked, pencil at the ready to take notes.

Another shrug. Caitlin seemed to think for a minute and she sighed. ‘I think I’m working Wednesday until closing time. And I’ve got three shifts at the daycare.’

‘Look, we can't be there every minute of every day’ Neal reminded everyone. ‘I think the important thing is that she has a visitor every day and that we concentrate on meal times so we can encourage her to eat.’

‘So, for today, I’ll go over with Liam —’ he concluded.

‘And me’ Caitlin said, interrupting.

Hope exchanged knowing looks with her dad. ‘Why don’t you come over to Aunt Elizabeth’s with me and Mom instead? It’ll do you good to think about something else for a while.’

Caitlin looked up at Hope and shook her head. ‘Would you mind if I don’t go? I don’t think I’ll be much good.’

Again, Hope tried to communicate silently with her dad. Maybe she just needed to let it go. ‘It’s up to you Caitlin. There’ll be plenty of time to talk about the wedding.’ 

Neal felt the need to prepare everyone for what they would find when they visited Linda over the next few days. ‘Mom and I saw her last night and they’ve got her on some sort of medication to help her breathe. Every couple of hours, they take off her oxygen and give it to her with this thing called a nebulizer.’ 

‘But she looked peaceful, didn’t she honey?’ Sara hastened to add as Neal nodded sadly.

Caitlin pushed her chair away from the table and got to her feet. ‘I’m going to go take a shower so I can be ready to leave.’

Sara and Neal exchanged glances; it was going to be a rough few days.

WCWCWC

‘Hey, I get it. This is your grandmother we’re talking about. It’s no problem, we’ll just catch up the next time you’re in town’ Cody said, over the phone.

Liam thought he detected more than a little disappointment in Cody’s voice. Heaven only knew he’d been excited about seeing his ex before he left to return to Syracuse for who knew how long.

‘Unless… my dad’s going to drop me off at the train. I can see if we can get there half an hour earlier and we could meet at the station and have a quick coffee before I leave’ Liam suggested.

He held his breath and waited, hoping for a positive reply.

‘That would be great. I could meet you there, say at 4:15?’ Cody suggested, sounding a lot more cheerful.

‘Yeah, yeah, that’d be perfect’ Liam replied with a sigh of relief. ‘4:15, I’ll be there. Why don’t we meet at the coffee shop?’

‘Great!’ Cody said. ‘Hey, I just got an idea. Why don’t I pick you up at the nursing home? It’ll give us a bit more time together and save your dad the trip.’

‘Really?’

‘Yeah, no problem.’

Liam smiled broadly. ‘Do you remember where it is?’

‘I think so. In New Rochelle… on Willow Street right?’

‘Yeah, right at the corner of Jarvis.’ 

There was silence on the phone line as Cody tried to visualize the street corner in his mind’s eye.

‘Oh and Liam… I’m really sorry about your grandmother.’

He heard Liam sigh loudly on the other end. ‘Yeah, thanks. See you later.’

WCWCWC

Sara and Hope sat in the car on the way over to Brooklyn. The news of Linda’s deteriorating condition had taken a toll on all of them but despite her eventual demise, life seemed to be pushing them to carry on.

‘I feel weird thinking about my wedding when Grandma is so sick’ Hope confided to her mom.

‘I get it. If we thought it would make things better, we’d all want to be over there all the time’ Sara replied.

‘Is Daddy okay?’

‘No… not really but you know your dad, he’s doing his best to fake it.’

‘This is like Grandma June all over again’ Hope said, her voice shaky.

Sara thought back to the hours surrounding June’s passing. She’d been away on a business trip to Chicago and she’d felt horrible not being there to say goodbye and stand by Neal. Of course, within hours, she’d gotten the news that Neal had been shot at the gallery and her whole world had turned upside down. This time, wild horses couldn't drag her away. She wasn't going anywhere and she planned on keeping a close eye on both Caitlin and Neal. They would be needing all the support they could get.

WCWCWC

Neal took a step into Liam’s bedroom to see if he was ready to go. He stopped suddenly as he spotted his son on the bed, his phone to his ear. 

‘Sure, tell him I’ll drop by when I get back’ he heard Liam’s quiet voice say.

Neal took a step back and retreated just outside the door, hovering out of sight - but not out of ear range. He leaned in so he could make out what Liam was saying.

‘No, it’s no trouble’ Liam replied to whoever he was talking to. ‘So, how is he? Really?

There was a prolonged silence as Neal waited to hear Liam’s response. So much for giving him space.

‘Yeah, well it’s bound to take time’ Liam finally said, preparing to hang up. ‘Look, I’ll call you when I get back and we’ll try to set something up. Take care.’

Neal pretended he hadn’t heard anything as he walked into the room. ‘You almost ready to go?’ he asked.

‘Yeah, yeah’ Liam replied as he put away his phone. ‘I just wanted to grab…’

He looked up at his dad. ‘That was Todd’s sister on the phone. He’s asking if I can come by and visit him again.’

‘Oh yeah?’ Neal said innocently - as if he hadn't figured that out for himself. ‘What did you tell her?’

‘I told her I’d get in touch when I got back but… Dad, do you think I’m making a mistake seeing him again?’

Neal came all the way into the room and took a seat next to his son on the edge of the bed. ‘I don’t know buddy, what do you think?’

Liam shrugged. ‘I just want to do what’s right.’

‘But you don’t want to give him false hopes…’ Neal said, finishing Liam’s thought.

Liam nodded. ‘I care about him… I really do but I’m trying to get past what happened between us and I’m hoping maybe Cody and I will be able to work things out. Eventually.’

Neal brought his hand to rest on Liam’s back. ‘I get it, buddy. You’re trying to be a good friend but you also have to think about yourself… think about what’s best for you.’

Liam’s eyes looked up, big and bright green as the sun shone into his bedroom. His eyes were so much like his mom’s that it brought an unexpected smile to Neal’s lips.

‘You’ve always taught us to do the right thing but it’s not always easy to know what the right thing is.’

‘Believe me, I get it. But in my experience, if you listen to your heart, you can’t really go wrong.’

Liam sat there, staring ahead. ‘Speaking of which…’ Neal continued, getting to his feet. ‘Do you still have that pebble of yours?’

Liam seemed to shake off the nostalgia and looked over at his dad who was staring back at him with a crooked grin. He was a good two inches taller than his dad and Neal rocked back on his heels and pulled back his shoulders, trying to give himself every possible advantage.

‘My pebble… seriously Dad?’

‘What? It worked for Grandma June and it helped me get through the worst of it when I was in the hospital.’

‘Dad, I was like thirteen years old…’

‘So? What does that have to do with it? It’s still a lucky pebble.’ 

Liam grinned and walked over to his chest of drawers. He opened the top one and moved a few things around, coming up with the good luck pebble he’d had since he was a toddler. He held it up and Neal smiled.

‘It can’t do any harm’ he said softly. ‘Grandma will love knowing you’re thinking of her.’

Liam stashed it in his jeans pocket and grabbed for his overnight bag which lay by the door. 

‘All right. I’m ready.’

WCWCWC

The two strapping young men sat side by side in the close quarters of Cody Miller’s subcompact car, their thighs bumping against each other repeatedly as they headed to the White Plains train station. It was a beautiful late winter day, the sun was shining - something Liam was thankful for as he repeatedly snuck peeks to his left behind the safety of his Oakley wrap-around sunglasses. 

Cody looked amazing, as a matter of fact, better than ever in Liam’s estimation. He’d obviously been working out, something he’d never really shown any interest in doing before. He was wearing the leather bomber jacket Liam had seen him wear dozens of times before but his arms seemed to fill it out more fully and his shoulders appeared to be broader than the last time they’d been together.

Being in Cody Miller’s presence was like catnip for Liam Caffrey: the smell of his aftershave, the sound of his raspy voice, the intense look in his eyes, the way his lips curled up when he smiled and those dimples appeared on either side of his mouth. Liam cleared his throat, intent on holding back from running his hands over the weathered leather coat to feel the buff muscles hidden underneath. He only had a few minutes left to connect with Cody before he was on a train back to Syracuse and he was determined not to leave NYC without taking one last shot at letting Cody know how he felt about him.

‘So, how was she?’ Cody asked as he expertly navigated traffic.

It took a moment for Liam to stop staring and realize he’d been asked a question.

‘She’s… she slept most of the time we were there’ he said, recalling the frail woman he'd just left behind. ‘She looks peaceful but she’s getting weaker all the time and the doctors really don’t think she’ll live much longer.’

Cody sighed and brought his hand to rest on Liam’s thigh for a brief instant as Liam’s heart rate soared. He felt his heart skip a beat and forced himself to refrain from putting his own hand on top of Cody’s to anchor it in place. 

‘I’m sorry to hear that. I know she hasn’t been back in your life all that long.’

Except for the car heater humming gently, there was awkward silence in the car. To Liam’s dismay, Cody pulled his hand away, returning it to the steering wheel. 

‘So, how are things going at school?’ Liam asked, changing the subject.

Traffic was light and they were practically halfway to their destination already. Liam frowned at the thought of having to leave Cody behind. 

‘Good. Things are good. Lots of work but I’m enjoying it.’

Liam picked up on some hesitation; he knew his ex well. There was something he wasn’t telling him and before he could ask for more details, Cody was telling him something he wasn't ready to hear.

‘I meant to mention it last night… I’ve started seeing someone. Someone I met in one of my classes.’

‘Oh yeah?’ Liam said, trying to sound casual. He could feel his heart thumping wildly in his chest and once again, he cleared his throat, trying to keep himself from showing too much emotion. ‘What’s his name?’

‘Justin… he’s a psych major but he’s in my first year sociology class.’

Liam wanted Cody to stop talking and yet, there was a part of him that was dying to know every single little detail. Does he make your heart beat like mad when he walks into a room? Does he do that thing with his tongue that I used to do to your ear that made you moan? Does he swoon when you take him in your arms? Does he make you laugh the way I did whenever I did my Sponge Bob imitation? Do you think he might be the one?

He decided to go for a more general question. ‘Is it… serious?’

‘Not yet’ Cody replied as he kept his eyes on the road up ahead. ‘I suppose it could be, we have a lot in common.’

Liam swallowed hard; he’d been afraid of this. While he was back in Syracuse, agonizing about what to do about his relationship with Todd, Cody had been off living his life. And why shouldn't he? It was inevitable he’d meet someone - after all, wasn't Cody Miller everyone’s dream guy? 

It was obvious to Liam that he wasn’t in any position to comment about Cody’s love life, considering he’d been at it, hot and heavy, practically the minute he’d moved to Syracuse. He tried to put a brave face on. 

‘That’s… great’ he lied. ‘I’m happy for you.’

‘I thought you should know’ Cody said, his voice quiet. ‘I wouldn't want you to hear it from somebody else.’

Cody’s comment had an edge to it, maybe he was still pissed off about the incident in Will Allenby’s basement. Images of Todd popped into Liam’s head.

‘Todd is out of the hospital’ he blurted out, unsure why he was bringing up the subject of his latest ex. ‘He’s seeing a therapist and he’s living with his sister off campus.’

Cody kept his eyes on the road, his face growing serious. ‘You still seeing him?’

‘No. I told you, I broke up with him’ Liam said with a little too much intensity. ‘It’s definitely over between the two of us.’

‘Does he know that?’

Liam frowned and looked over at Cody. ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’

‘Will mentioned he still stays in touch with you… a lot.’

Liam looked out the car window at the passers-by. They were almost back in White Plains and if he was going to reach out to Cody, he was going to have to say something soon. The way the conversation was going, they’d be arguing in no time.

‘Cody, it’s really not like that. I told him when I visited him at the hospital that we could never go back to the way things were. And I meant it.’

Cody nodded and glanced over in his direction with what Liam recognized as a disingenuous smile. Suddenly, there was tension in the car and Liam grew uncomfortable. If knowing that Cody was getting serious about another guy was having this effect on him, was it any surprise that Cody had found it difficult when he’d read that text from Todd in the basement of Will Allenby’s house. 

He didn't want to be the guy who lived with the double standard; it was time to acknowledge the elephant in the car. ‘I guess it wasn't easy on you when you found out about Todd and me, huh?’

Cody tried to brush it off. ‘I got over it’ he said, a little too cooly. 

Ouch! That stung but Liam nodded bravely. ‘I know it was really crappy that you had to find out that way…I mean on New Year’s Eve.’

‘I’ll admit you could have handled it better’ Cody acknowledged. ‘But like I said. I got over it. And now I’ve got Justin in my life.’

Double ouch! Was Cody trying to provoke him? Hurt him? Get revenge for Liam’s lack of candour back when they’d last been together?

The White Plains train station was within sight now and Liam was beginning to panic. Once they were inside the station, it would be difficult to carry on the kind of conversation he’d been hoping to have with his ex. He had things he wanted to say and he was running out of time.

Cody slipped into an empty parking spot and before Liam knew what was happening, he’d turned off the engine and had his hand on the door handle.

‘Cody wait!’ he said urgently, his hand holding him back. ‘Please!’

It was hard to turn to face each other in the cramped space but Liam managed to angle his body to his left, pulling off his sunglasses and tucking them into the top of his shirt.

‘What?’

‘Can we… can we just sit here for a minute? There’s something I want to talk to you about.’

Cody sighed loudly.

‘Look, I don’t know what’s going on but you seem… annoyed with me’ Liam said, the best description he could come up with for Cody’s sudden change in behaviour.

The other man just stared ahead but said nothing.

‘I don’t get it’ Liam continued. ‘Last night, you sounded… excited about us getting together for coffee today. Has something changed?’

‘I was… I wanted to tell you about Justin’ Cody admitted, turning as best he could to face the other man. ‘But you had to go and make it all about Todd.’

The way he said his name left no doubt that he was pissed off - or was that jealous, Liam wondered.

‘Look, I know I could have handled the whole Todd situation better —’

‘You think?’ Cody asked sarcastically.

Liam tried to rein in his annoyance; if he didn't keep his cool, this conversation was going to hell in a hand basket and he’d never get his point across. 

‘I’ll admit I should have told you about Todd when I first saw you again at Will’s party. Is this what this is all about? Have you been pissed off about it all this time?’

Cody said nothing but looked away. It wasn't like him to nurse a grudge — unless his feelings for Liam were more than he let on.

Liam examined his ex’s face, trying to figure out what he saw there: hurt, anger, disappointment.

‘Cody, look at me’ he said with sudden self-assurance. 

Cody had barely turned in his direction when Liam’s hands instinctively moved up to his face, forcing him to look straight at him and in a surprise move, he planted a decisive kiss on the other man’s lips. 

The look on Cody’s face softened as he responded in kind, the kiss intensifying. After a moment, they pulled away, both of them breathing heavily. They stared at each other, both of them taken aback by what had just happened.

‘That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you!’ Liam said.

WCWCWC

The man sat in a rusted out car and kept an eye on the Caffrey house from a distance. He’d seen Sara and Hope leave together in one of the family cars followed shortly thereafter by Caitlin with Caffrey and a younger guy he’d never seen before. The guy was lighter in colouring and maybe a little taller than Caffrey but they had a similar build and he walked just like him - maybe the infamous Liam he’d heard so much about.

That accounted for all of the home’s inhabitants as far as he knew — except for the pooch. He patted the large marrow bone he'd picked up at the butcher shop lying by his side in brown paper wrapping. The four dollars he’d invested would certainly pay off if it meant keeping the dog busy while he did his thing.

There hadn't been any action for the past ten minutes and he finally turned the car engine off and headed towards 4788 Meadowbrook Street. With a quick glance up and down the street to make sure he hadn't been spotted, he slipped past the gate on the side of the house and disappeared from view.

And just like that, Jesse Davis was on his way to exacting his revenge.

TBC


	50. Chapter 50

Despite being one of the last to board, Liam was pleased to be able to nab a window seat, halfway down the second to last car. The train was surprisingly quiet for a Sunday at dinnertime although he knew it would be packed to the gills by the time it finished its stops in Poughkeepsie, Albany and Utica and pulled into the station in Syracuse. 

He reached into his backpack, determined to get right to work on studying for his early morning economics exam. He’d intended on studying all weekend but there was something about being home that screamed rest and relaxation and he'd fallen prey to the lure of being with his friends and family. Of course, this latest development with his grandmother had been totally unexpected, leaving everyone a little shaken up. One thing was for sure, going home for the weekend had helped him temporarily forget all his troubles with Todd Greenway.

His hand felt around inside his bag, bumping into something soft and unfamiliar, wrapped in plastic wrap. He pulled it out and grinned widely at the sight of a couple of muffins and four slices of lemon poppyseed cake neatly wrapped with a yellow post-it note on top: Don’t eat it all at once. Dad xx

He shook his head in disbelief and chuckled, placing the baked goods on the seat next to him; the unexpected treats would be a welcome reward after he’d done a little bit of reading. He kicked off his shoes and settled in, putting his feet up on the empty seat in front of him. The sweet smell of lemon hit his nostrils and without much hesitation, he gave in, unwrapping the tidy package and stuffing half a slice into his mouth with an appreciative moan.

His folks would never change. Nowadays, when he went home, he was always treated to a hero’s welcome, both of them doting on him, always wanting to give him extra cash, his mom buying him clothes, his dad cooking his favourite meals. It was comforting and yet, the attraction he felt to the big bad world outside of White Plains was undeniably strong. Being at university meant being independent, developing critical thinking and having to make decisions on his own without daily input from his parents. He doubted he’d ever stop asking for their advice on the big ticket items but there was something empowering about having the freedom to manage his own schedule and make his own decisions - good or bad. 

He recalled how Hope had talked in such glowing terms about being away from home, how her short time in Pittsburgh had opened up new horizons for her. She’d been right: there was a time to be home, safe and secure in your parents’ embrace and a time to spread your wings and fly - even if you did fall on your face every now and then.

Sadness overcame him as he thought of the many hardships his sister had had to face over the last few years and how her dreams of graduating from Carnegie Mellon had vanished in the blink of an eye. More importantly though, Hope had managed to inspire everyone around her by overcoming the many obstacles on her path and getting right back on her feet again. She was one of the most optimistic people Liam had ever met - except for his dad, of course. Both of them shared the uncanny ability of taking a sack of sour lemons and making the best damn lemonade they possibly could - or in his dad’s case, the best lemon poppy seed cake he’d ever tasted. He liked to think that, despite the hardships she’d endured, his big sister was happy these days. She’d found love, something that still escaped him, and she glowed whenever she talked about the kids in her art classes at the gallery. He thought ahead to her upcoming surgery and he pulled out his phone from his jacket pocket, typing in a reminder to get in touch at the end of the week to check up on her.

His eyes moved to the textbook on his lap and he groaned. How did he always manage to procrastinate until the last possible minute before finally buckling down to study? He took out his notebook and pulled out his study notes - at least he’d had the presence of mind to get them ready ahead of time. Not for the first time, he silently thanked Mr. Holmes, his grade nine history teacher, for showing him how to summarize his class notes into bullet points for studying. He’d been using the study technique ever since — and with much success. 

Liam felt around his bag for his favourite pen - the one his folks had given him as part of his high school graduation gift. He felt his heart stop as he reached all the way to the bottom of his bag, unable to locate the lucky pen and suddenly remembering he’d tucked it into the side zipper of his backpack. 

Phew! Liam Caffrey was very particular about what pen he used for writing up his study notes - the same one he always used for writing test papers. Any old pen would do when taking notes in class but when it came time to preparing his study notes for an exam, he always used his special silver-plated Cross Calais pen, the one with the little graduation cap on the clip. 

Young Caffrey had always been superstitious about all kinds of things in his life - especially preparing for his basketball games. His game day ritual included eating spaghetti bolognese exactly two hours before a game (he’d once substituted a vegetarian option which had led to a crushing defeat to the opposing team). He followed that up by listening to his pre-game playlist of hard rock oldies while he did his stretches and limbering exercises. The playlist lasted precisely thirty-eight minutes and forty-three seconds and culminated with Freddy Mercury belting out ‘We are the champions’ in his inimitable voice with the reputed four octave range. Afterwards, he would find a quiet spot and settle in to listen to Vivaldi’s Four Seasons, an almost religious experience, as he calmed down and focussed on the upcoming game, imagining himself clear-headed as he performed to the best of his abilities. 

Everybody on the team knew not to talk to him before a game, lest they get the evil eye. Josh Monteith had found that out the hard way when he’d interrupted the ritual once only to be given the silent treatment by his roomie for a whole week after the team had ended up on the losing side of a very close game. 

Liam’s many superstitions extended to his preparation for writing tests and exams. He’d convinced himself that his gift pen held special powers and stored all the information he jotted down while preparing his study notes only to be magically released when he eventually came face to face with his test paper. Of course, he’d never really properly tested the theory or taken the time to find out if there was any correlation between his performance and the length of time he’d studied — or any other factors for that matter. 

The pen knew all. Or so he’d convinced himself. 

He glanced down at his notes and sighed; the morning economics exam on supply and demand was worth forty percent of his final mark and he could not afford to blow it - not so close to the end of the semester. Despite this dire realization, his mind wandered to Cody Miller and their earlier clinch in the close confines of the car. He hadn't known he was going to kiss Cody right up until the moment he was actually locking lips with him. Oh, he’d wanted to, he’d wanted to for a long time but after the heart-wrenching decision they’d made to go their separate ways, it seemed like cruel and unusual punishment for them to go there. They had come awfully close on New Year’s Eve - if it hadn't been for that unfortunate and lewd text from Todd Greenway. He shook his head and refocussed. The timing hadn't been right back then, he reminded himself. He hadn't been perfectly honest with Cody about his relationship with Todd and that was a very poor foundation for rebuilding a relationship as special as the one he’d had with Cody Miller.

Now that he’d definitively turned the page on his relationship with Todd, Liam had been thinking more and more about Cody and the possibility of a reconciliation. Maybe they’d been hasty in deciding that a long distance relationship couldn't work. Plenty of couples had committed relationships while they were apart - look at Elton John and David Furnish, they were rocking it. And besides, let’s face it, Syracuse wasn't exactly Timbuktu. 

He closed his eyes, reliving the kiss, the feel of Cody’s rough, stubbly cheek rubbing up against his, the feel of Cody’s soft lips on his open mouth, the faint smell of aftershave wafting through the air, the sound of Cody’s laboured breathing as they finally pulled apart. He sighed, remembering the look of pure desire in the other man’s eyes as he’d pulled Liam in for a second round, every part of his body tingling in response. He would have stayed there forever if not for the fact that the train was leaving the station whether he was on it or not.

Cody had reluctantly admitted that things weren’t all that great with Justin; the guy had an annoying habit of burping loudly in public places and he whined when he didn't get his way. Liam had chuckled at the description and the two men had held each other for a few more minutes before Liam had been compelled to make a run for the train. They’d talk some more, Cody promised. No guarantees but maybe they could talk it out, see if they could make this work.

Liam sat there on the train, eyes faraway instead of on the textbook lying in his lap.

Hope. There was hope.

WCWCWC

Neal and Caitlin pulled into the driveway just as Hope and Sara were getting out of the car. He could see the bag of food from the Full Moon, their favourite local Thai place, dangling from Hope’s wrist. So much for coordination, he thought, glancing over at Caitlin who sat there with an extra-large sausage and pepperoni pizza on her lap.

‘Hey!’ he called out to them as he stepped out of the car.

Sara spotted the telltale box in Caitlin’s hands. ‘Oh no!’ she cried out. 

She made her way to Neal and kissed him hello. ‘I’m sorry honey. I should have checked with you.’

He gave her a sober smile. ‘No harm done. We've got a busy week ahead, I’m sure we’ll be glad for the leftovers.’

The girls had already disappeared into the house as the couple stood in the driveway, arms around each other.

‘How was the wedding planning?’ he asked as she shrugged.

‘A little subdued. So, how was she today?’

Neal stepped away, leaving on arm draped around her shoulder as they moved towards the front door. 

‘She was awake for a little while and she ate a whole two spoonfuls of apple sauce’ he reported. ‘But she mostly slept through the afternoon.’

Sara pulled him closer and he smiled sadly, thinking of the bright spot of their afternoon. ‘She smiled when she saw Liam sitting there.’

‘Did he get off all right?’

‘Cody picked him up at the nursing home and drove him to the train station’ Neal said coyly.

Sara turned to face him, her smile brightening. ‘Cody, huh?’

Neal wagged his eyebrows and held the door open for her. The girls were already in the kitchen, comparing their purchases and deciding what they wanted to dig into first while Raffie lay under the table, seemingly disinterested.

Sara gravitated towards him and crouched, reaching out and running her hand over his fur while he looked up, indifferent. 

‘What’s the matter buddy? It’s not like you not to be nipping at our heels when we walk in with food.’

She spotted the remnants of a large bone lying by his side - he’d given it the once over and apparently, he was done with it - at least for the time being.

‘Who gave Raffie a bone?’ she asked, holding it up with disdain by the tip of her well manicured fingers. 

Neal shrugged. ‘Girls?’

‘Not me’ Hope said, reaching for plates in the cupboard.

‘Me neither’ Caitlin replied.

Neal frowned. ‘Maybe Liam? Or somebody might have brought it over last night and we didn't notice.’

‘Will Allenby works part-time at the pet store’ Caitlin reminded everyone. ‘But I didn't notice him bringing it in.’

The table was set and Hope walked to the fridge, filling everyone’s drink orders as the foursome settled around the kitchen table for an informal meal.

‘Isn’t tonight your marriage preparation class?’ Sara asked, helping herself to some vegetable stir-fry.

Hope glanced at the time. ‘Yeah, it starts at eight. Cam’s picking me up.’

Caitlin piped up, her mouth still half full. ‘Personally, I think the whole thing is stupid. Who needs classes to prepare for marriage? It’s not like there’s going to be a test or something.’

‘Well, we prepare for all kinds of things, why would marriage be any different?’ Neal opined, playing devil’s advocate. ‘Besides having kids, it’s probably the most important thing you do in your life.’

‘What kind of stuff do you talk about?’ Caitlin asked, looking at Hope.

‘Well, we sit around with the priest and two other couples who are getting married soon and we talk about how to better communicate, we share what’s important to us, whether we want children… you know, just to see how compatible we are and what kind of issues we might be facing.’

Caitlin wasn't getting it. ‘But isn't that the kind of thing you want to discuss privately? Why would you want to talk about it in front of other people?’

‘You do talk about it privately. They give us homework to do but this way we can hear what other people have to say’ Hope explained. 

‘Homework?’ Caitlin scoffed. ‘Seriously? Like what?’ 

‘Well, this week, Cam and I each had to come up with something that bothers us about the other person. And then, we had to find a way to bring it up in a respectful, loving way.’

‘Like what?’

‘Well, Cam reminded me that he hates it when I get argumentative. So I just listened to what he had to say and now I know how much it bugs him so I can try to avoid doing it.’

Neal looked over at his wife; something about all this sounded awfully familiar.

Caitlin frowned and bit into her pizza. ‘Sounds like an awful lot of work to me.’

‘It’s really not that bad, actually. At first I thought we were going to hate it but now, I kind of look forward to it.’

Sara and Neal listened, enjoying the little side show.

‘Did you two take marriage preparation classes?’ Caitlin asked, turning to look at her foster mom.

‘No’ Sara smiled. ‘I guess you’d say we kind of stumbled into marriage, didn’t we Neal?’

He chuckled. ‘I guess you could say that. It was kind of learn as you go with us.’

Caitlin glanced from Neal to Sara, her eyes narrowing in question. She loved to hear about the early years of their marriage.

‘So did you guys get married in a church?’

Again, Neal and Sara exchanged mischievous glances.

‘No, we got married at June’s house. In her garden as a matter of fact’ Neal replied.

‘Was it a big wedding?’ Hope asked, thinking ahead to her own nuptials.

‘You don’t remember?’ Neal said with a playful smirk.

Hope rolled her eyes. Although she’d been there, as evidenced by all those wedding photographs, she’d been far too young to have any recollection.

‘It was really a small affair’ Sara said. ‘A couple of people from my office, some people Dad worked with and of course, Uncle Mozzie and the Burkes.’

‘Who was your maid of honour Mom?’

‘Auntie Elizabeth.’ 

‘How come it wasn't Emily?’ Caitlin asked, as always curious.

Neal got up to get a roll of paper towels and set it on the table. ‘Now you're opening a whole new can of worms’ he said, looking at his wife.

Sara shook her head. ‘Emily and I were… separated when we were younger. We only found each other again about seven or eight years ago.’

‘Found each other? What— ’ Caitlin was just about to ask for more details when they heard the front door open, followed by a familiar voice.

‘Hey Caffreys!’ Mozzie called out. 

He threw his coat aside and walked towards the group, rubbing his hands in glee at the sight of food on the table. ‘Good, looks like I didn't miss dinner after all’ he said, pulling up a chair.

‘What’s the matter? It’s so quiet in here’ he asked as he grabbed for a slice of pizza. ‘Did somebody die?’

Neal gave him a scornful look and Mozzie looked around the table at the other family members.

‘Mozzie, it’s Linda. She’s not doing well at all’ Sara said quietly.

He put down the slice of pizza and swallowed, looking at Neal. ‘I’m sorry man. I didn't know.’

Neal gave him a shrug and returned to his plate of food. ‘It’s been a long time coming Moz.’

The mood was decidedly on the gloomy side but Neal was determined to keep everybody’s spirits up.

‘Caitlin and I want to hear all about the wedding planning, don’t we?’ he said, giving his foster daughter a little elbow shove.

‘Yeah, how did it go?’ she asked. ‘Did you pick an ugly bridesmaid dress and a frilly crinoline for me to wear.’

Hope chuckled. ‘We didn't get that far. But we did talk a little about the ceremony and where we might like to have the dinner afterwards.’

Neal smiled, trying to get his head in the game. ‘So tell us.’

‘Well, we’re getting married at Saint Anthony’s and there’s this amazing Italian place up the street. I think that might be an option for the reception.’

‘Or we could have it here’ Neal volunteered spontaneously. ‘The weather will be nice by then.’

Hope and Sara exchanged glances. ‘Well, we did talk about that but Hope and Cam think they can keep a better lid on things if they do it at a restaurant.’

Neal’s eyes narrowed, not quite understanding. Mozzie spoke up.

‘Oh… Mrs. Suit?’ he said as Neal’s face lit up in understanding. ‘I get it, she can be a little… intense.’  
Neal looked over at Sara, trying to stifle a giggle. Talk about the pot calling the kettle black. He finally gave in and laughed softly.

‘She can be a little intense Moz?’ he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

‘What?’ Mozzie replied with a frown. He turned to look at Hope, his face excited. ‘You know what? I know this amazing band who could play at the reception. They do a mix of Himalayan chants and apala.’

Neal hovered behind Mozzie, giving his daughter the cut signal, urging her not to go there. 

‘A-a-pala?’ Hope repeated. ‘What’s… apala?’

Neal shook his head in desperation. Alas it was too late, the genie was out of the bottle.

‘Oh, it’s a percussion-based style of music from the Muslim Yoruba people in Nigeria’ Mozzie replied without missing a beat.

Hope’s eyes grew wider and she cleared her throat; maybe she needed to worry less about her aunt Elizabeth and more about her uncle Mozzie. ‘I’ll let you know about that, Uncle Moz.’

‘So…’ Neal said, cutting things off before they got any more involved. ‘Who’s visiting Grandma tomorrow?’

‘I can go’ Caitlin called out.

Neal gave her a death stare. ‘You were there today and you have a shift at the daycare tomorrow. Let somebody else take a turn.’

She took a spoonful of shrimp pad thai out of the container and placed it alongside her slice of pizza. ‘Yeah but I’ll be there already…’ she began before she was cut off.

‘No, you need your rest honey’ Sara said, her voice adamant. ‘I can be there to help with lunch and I can stay until about three.’

‘And I’m going to pop in after my shift at the gallery’ Hope said. 

‘So there, that’s settled’ Neal said pointedly. He glanced down at the many offerings on the table and zeroed in on a plate of rolls. 

‘Now, does anybody have dibs on that last summer roll?’

WCWCWC

Neal was busy putting leftovers into individual containers, perfect for brown bagging while the rest of the family sat around the table debating the merits of emerald versus burgundy for the bridesmaids dresses. Mozzie was in the middle of weighing in when there was a knock on the door and Cameron called out from the front hall.

‘It’s only me!’ he said, making his way into the kitchen.

‘Hey Cam! You hungry? We’ve got plenty of leftovers’ Neal said, pointing to the obscene amount of food on the kitchen counter.

‘Naw, I picked up something earlier.’

He looked over at Hope who’d risen to greet him. ‘You ready to go babe?’

‘Yeah, I’m just going to change my top’ she said, placing a kiss on his cheek. 

‘So what’s the topic tonight?’ Caitlin asked from her spot at the table.

Hope replied without hesitation. ‘It’s managing finances.’

Cam frowned and looked over at the group, preparing to disagree with his fiancée.

‘Sweetie, I’m pretty sure tonight’s topic is conflict resolution’ he countered as he took her hand in his and gently rubbed her knuckles.

Hope resisted, her face hardening. So like her mom, Neal thought. ‘No, it’s not’ she said, with all the assurance of someone who knows they’re right. ‘It’s managing finances, I’m sure.’

Neal frowned as he kept working; it was rare to see his daughter and Cameron arguing. He waited along with the rest of the group to see if Cam would give in. 

’N-n-o it’s not’ Cam said in a sing-song voice. ‘It’s definitely conflict resolution.’

Everybody grew quiet as the argument appeared to escalate. 

Sara got to her feet and joined Neal by the counter. She placed her hand on his arm. ‘I’m going to go upstairs and collect some dirty laundry before it gets to be too late’ she said.

She dropped her voice although everyone could still hear what she was saying, as clear as day. ‘For their sake, I hope it’s conflict resolution’ she mumbled before walking away to tend to the laundry.

Hope gave both Cam and her mom a dirty look. ‘I’ll come up with you Mom’ she said pointedly, leaving Cameron behind with the rest of the group.

Caitlin giggled and Neal looked over at her. Ever since the latest news about Linda, the kid had been walking around like a zombie. She’d spent all day, glued to her grandmother’s side - exactly what Linda would have hated. It was nice to see her laugh and relax a little.

She took one last bite and got to her feet. ‘I think I’m going to go down and work on my painting for a while’ she announced as she made a little detour to the bathroom by the front door.

‘I’ll be down in a little while’ Neal called out over his shoulder. 

‘Do you two want coffee?’ Neal asked the two men as he held up the half-full carafe on the counter.

‘Sure’ Mozzie replied, settling in for the long run.

‘None for me’ Cameron said. ‘They always serve us coffee and pastries at the church.’

Neal poured a cup for himself and another one for Mozzie and joined the two of them at the table. 

‘Sorry I had to bail on our brunch date today’ he said, looking at his future son-in-law.

‘No worries. We’ll do it another time.’

Cam hesitated for a moment before speaking. ‘I’m sorry… about Mrs. Bennett. How is she doing?’

Neal shrugged and his face grew serious. ‘Not great. The doctors have told us to prepare for the worst.’

Mozzie looked away, as always uncomfortable with such distressing news. Cam looked on with empathy; not unlike his future father-in-law, the young man had a heart of gold and if something made Hope sad, it made him sad too.

‘My grandmother Irma died last year. She was my dad’s mom. It was the first time I ever saw my dad cry. I felt so useless, like there was nothing I could say or do. There’s something about seeing a grown man cry…’

Neal nodded. ‘I’m just thankful we had some time together before… before it was too late.’

Cam shrugged as a memory flashed in the deep recesses of his mind. ‘I remember when you flew us all out to St. Louis to meet her. Seems like just yesterday. She took my hand in hers and she said: ‘Oh, yes, you must be Hope’s young man… and Neal’s right hand man.’’

Neal smiled wistfully and gave Cameron a friendly pat on the arm. ‘She was right. You are my right hand —’

He was interrupted by the sound of screaming voices coming from upstairs and downstairs simultaneously.

‘DAD!’ came Hope’s voice in the distance.

‘MR. C!’ Caitlin shouted from downstairs, sounding alarmed. 

Two seconds later, he heard Sara call out, her voice panicked. ‘NEAL!’

Cam was first on his feet, running for the stairs and Neal followed hot on his heels while Mozzie headed for the basement stairs just as Caitlin let out a blood curdling scream.

TBC


	51. Chapter 51

Sara and Hope climbed up to the second floor, the voices of the men downstairs in the kitchen fading in the background. The two of them had spent the afternoon over at the Burkes’, making a start on the wedding preparations despite the dark cloud hanging over their collective heads. In the end, they’d spent most of the afternoon talking about Linda Bennett, her ill health and what now appeared to be her impending death. 

El had half-heartedly pulled out some magazines, doing her best to shift the focus of conversation to the upcoming nuptials but in the end, Hope and Sara’s hearts hadn't been in it. The conversation had been limited to talking about the ceremony which was to be held at St. Anthony’s, a quaint little parish which was located in the Bay Ridge area of Brooklyn. There’d be other opportunities to talk about cakes and dresses and flowers. Now wasn't the time.

Hope and Sara arrived at the top of the stairs and prepared to go their separate ways, Sara on her search for dirty socks and Hope up to the third floor to change her clothes. 

She lay her hand on her mom’s arm, silently urging her to wait a moment. ‘Mom, do you think I’m argumentative?’ 

‘You’re kidding, right?’ Sara said with a touch of derision.

Hope let her bottom lip protrude in an exaggerated pout. ‘I really don’t mean to be. Anyway, you always said it was a sign of self-confidence and strength.’

Sara chuckled. ‘Honey, believe me, I get it. How many times have you heard Daddy complain about how pig-headed I am. I’m afraid you’ve inherited that trait from the Ellis side of the family. Your grandpa Jim was such a stubborn man. My mom used to just clam up and leave the room whenever he started to argue with her.’ 

‘You don’t talk much about your dad’ Hope commented. 

‘He’s been gone an awfully long time’ Sara said as she ran her hand over Hope’s thick head of hair. 

Hope’s face grew tight, lines forming on her forehead. ‘So, how do you and Daddy work things out when you don’t agree about something. I mean, I’ve seen you guys argue plenty about little things but what about the big stuff? What if you don’t agree about important things?’

Sara sighed loudly, thinking of the many disagreements she and Neal had had over the years, not the least of which was the one that had lead to her storming out of a high-end restaurant just twenty-four hours earlier.

‘Well, we try to talk it out. We never give up on each other and we do our best to understand the other person’s point of view and still be honest about what we’re feeling. But nobody’s perfect… and when you’re married and living with someone day in and day out, you get to know every little thing about them. The good and the bad, the stuff that makes your heart go pitter patter and the stuff that makes your blood pressure go through the roof. Dad and I just try to do our best and remind ourselves that, no matter what, we love each other. If you keep reminding yourself of that, you’ll always find your way back to each other.’

Hope’s eyes narrowed as if faced with a huge problem to solve.

‘Oh sweetie, you and Cam are going to be fine. You have the two most important ingredients for any relationship. Love and respect. When all is said and done, those are the most important things. The rest is just the ups and downs of everyday life.’

Hope nodded and smiled weakly. 

‘And when you’re wrong, don't be afraid to apologize’ Sara added as if confiding a secret. ‘That always helps to smooth things over.’

Hope turned away and prepared to climb up to her room, taking the first two steps and stopping suddenly, seemingly thinking better of it. She turned to face her mom and came back down, reaching out and putting her arms around her neck.

‘I love you Mom’ she said simply before turning around and jogging up to the third floor.

Sara stood in the hallway for a moment, watching her beautiful little girl climb up the stairs. In a couple of months, she would be embarking on the most amazing adventure of her life and those spontaneous hugs would be few and far between. 

Hope was so much wiser than she’d been at her age. Back when she was in her mid twenties, Sara had been flailing. She’d had a tenuous relationship with her parents before they’d been cruelly ripped away from her following a horrific car accident. Her mom had been, for lack of a better word, a doormat and her dad… well, he’d been a dispassionate man, a hard worker and good provider but a man who was unable to show any warmth or kindness towards his wife or his two daughters. For him, everything was about work ethic, putting your head down and plowing through at all costs. Emily had rebelled against him but sadly, Sara had adopted the same belief system, causing her to develop the hard shell it had taken Neal so long to break through. 

She sighed and turned her mind back to collecting dirty clothes for that last laundry load of the week.

WCWCWC

Hope’s mind was busy pondering what top to change into when she rounded the corner into her bedroom. Had she thrown that blue top in the laundry basket she wondered as she stepped into her room. She could immediately sense something wasn't quite right. The door was ajar, not wide open as she’d left it earlier in the day. She took a tentative step and pushed it open, her eyes drawn to her bed which had been tidily made the last time she’d checked. 

Her eyes narrowed as she took in the sight of all her bras and panties, spread out on the bed and carefully placed in the shape of a heart. She stared for a moment, not sure what she was seeing. Was this somebody’s idea of a joke? And if so, who? Cam? Caitlin? She stepped into her room and approached the bed, picking up a pair of panties and examining them as if they might tell her how they had hopped out of her underwear drawer and onto the bed. She looked around the room and froze as she saw her reflection in the mirror.

‘DAD!!!’ she shouted.

WCWCWC

Caitlin left Mozzie, Cameron and Neal behind and made a quick detour to the powder room at the front of the house. She could feel the tension vibrating throughout her whole body following an afternoon spent by her beloved grandma’s side. It was agonizing to have to sit by and watch her like that and yet, Caitlin had been unable - and unwilling - to let go of Linda’s hand the whole time they were there. How long would Linda be with them? Nobody knew the answer but one thing was for certain, Caitlin wasn’t ready to let her go. She never would.

Staring back at her pale reflection in the bathroom mirror, she forced herself to shake off the sad notion. It would do her good to go down to the studio and work on her latest painting - another one of her grandma Linda, of course. Painting wasn't really her thing, generally speaking. She still preferred sculpture as a means of expression and she liked to experiment with a variety of mediums - clay, marble, even glass. But she’d wanted to try to capture the nuances in the woman’s fading blue eyes and, with Neal’s help, she’d been working on an oil piece she was rather proud of.

Recently, Neal had brought up the possibility of Caitlin teaching one of the preschool classes at the art school. Like Hope, Caitlin had a real knack with young kids. So far, she hadn't taken Neal up on his offer, preferring to focus her energies on arts and crafts projects for her group of three-year olds at the day care centre where she was known as the ‘art lady’. 

Maybe she should take Neal up on his offer she reflected as she tiptoed past the kitchen, unobserved, and started down towards the basement studio. It really was a sanctuary, a place where she could regroup and refocus. She could hear the men talking as she descended the steps. Cam was saying something about his grandmother passing away and how he’d seen his dad cry for the first time. She stopped for a second to listen to Neal’s response.

She wondered how he would react when Linda eventually passed away. Would he cry? Surely, he would. He was such a sensitive and caring man. She’d seen him cry a few times since she’d moved in with the Caffreys, especially following Hope’s terrible accident. Of course, at first, Neal had tried to be strong for everybody else, to put up a front but his world had eventually begun to crumble and he’d turned to alcohol for relief of what was unbearable pain. Throughout those horrible months, she’d seen him shed a tear or two a couple of times when the subject of Hope came up in conversation. And, of course, there was that horrible Saturday morning when they’d all gathered in New Rochelle to confront him about his drinking. He’d been in real blubbering mode that day as everyone poured out their heart to him. 

If anything, his heart wrenching display of emotion that day had made her respect him even more. She’d always admired people who could be true to themselves, who weren't afraid of showing their true feelings. She’d spent most her young life pretending to be brave to keep from hurting too much. But pretending didn't make it hurt any less. It hurt… every time she moved away from yet another foster home, every time she was forced to leave a school she liked, leaving behind friendships she’d worked so hard to cultivate, every time her mom disappointed her, every time she felt the world rejecting her for who she really was. 

But living with the Caffreys… well, it had become a safe place to show her true emotions and she’d begun to trust that she could be herself without fear of judgement or rejection. Sometimes, however, those emotions got the better of her and instead of letting them out in appropriate ways, she acted out with drugs, sex, drinking and just generally not following the rules. Even though she was terrified of rejection, she kept pushing the boundaries with her foster parents, wanting to see how far she could push before they rejected her like everyone else in her life had done. And yet, the Caffreys still hadn't given up on her and lately she had begun to let her guard down.

Maybe this was her forever family after all. One thing was for sure, Linda Bennett was a huge part of that.

She stepped off the staircase and sauntered past the laundry room, heading towards the studio. The door was closed - which was rather unusual. Especially in the winter, Neal would always nag the kids about keeping the door open to keep the warm air circulating. She reached for the door knob and let herself in, feeling a cold rush of air sweep over her. She reached for the light switch just as her foot stepped on something hard and firm which crumbled under the weight of her foot. 

It took a minute for her brain to catch up with her eyes. 

‘MR. C!!!’ she cried out.

WCWCWC

Sara turned away from her baby girl. She was something else - so strong and self-assured and yet caring and sensitive. She really was the perfect blend of her and Neal. She headed across the hall into Liam’s room to see if he'd left any dirty clothes behind before heading over to Caitlin’s room to do the same. She picked up the laundry basket from the hallway and headed to her own bedroom to finish preparing for the obligatory Sunday evening load - one last chance if you wanted something washed before the week started. 

The room was in semi-darkness and she almost slipped on something, smiling as she thought of the flower petals that had littered the floor the night before - they must have missed one when they’d cleaned up. It took a moment before she realized that she’d slipped on the piece of fabric which had last been seen hanging over their bed, covered in fairy lights. She stepped over the bunched up material and turned on the bedside lamp to find that the whole celestial decoration had collapsed onto the bed and floor. She barely had time to form a theory before she noticed the dresser drawers from both hers and Neal’s dressers were open, clothing hanging out and strewn all over the floor.

‘NEAL!!!’ she shouted.

WCWCWC

The pair of police officers who were dispatched to the Caffrey home looked like they were coming to the end of a very long shift. Neal offered to make them some coffee and they agreed to take down their report at the kitchen table, sipping on a cup of Italian Roast. 

Mozzie had departed as soon as he’d heard the word ‘police’ and Sara had encouraged Hope and Cam to go to their class despite the disturbing events and to leave everything to them. Hope had reluctantly agreed but not before packing an overnight bag and announcing with that all too familiar stutter that she’d be spending the night over at Cam’s place.

‘And you arrived at what time, exactly?’ the officer whose name tag read ‘Turner’ asked.

Sara and Neal sat side by side and glanced at each other.

‘Somewhere around… six thirty?’ Neal said as Sara nodded.

‘And you didn't notice anything unusual when you walked in? No sign of forced entry?’

‘No, nothing’ Neal replied. ‘Not until Caitlin went downstairs… that’s when we saw that the intruder had come in through the basement window.’

The other officer, a young woman with a streak of blond in her otherwise dark hair nodded.

‘We’ll do a walkabout in a minute’ she assured them. ‘Have you touched anything?’

‘No. As soon as we saw someone had broken in, we just left everything the way it was.’

‘Anything obvious missing?’ Turner asked, pen in hand.

Once again, Neal and Sara looked at each other and shrugged.

‘Our room has been ransacked’ Sara replied, her voice trembling. ‘I didn’t want to… disturb anything until you got here.’

The woman nodded. ‘Good, good. We’ll dust for fingerprints, see if we come up with anything.’

‘Fingerprints?’ Neal repeated. ‘You do that for break-ins?’

‘Considering the message that was left in your daughter’s room… that could be construed as a threat.’

Caitlin had been sitting in the family room with Raffie, watching the scene unfold in the nearby kitchen. She got to her feet.

‘I know who did this’ she declared, her voice unwavering.

The officers looked up at her. ‘It’s my brother, Jesse Davis. I know it. He was angry with Sara and Mr. C and he’s pissed off at me.’

The man looked over in Neal and Sara’s direction with a look of confusion. He’d assumed Caitlin was their daughter and now she was talking about a brother.

‘Caitlin is our foster daughter’ Sara explained. ‘She’s been living with us for about six years.’

‘Why would this Jesse Davis want to break into your home?’ the woman asked.

Neal spoke up. ‘Caitlin’s brother stayed with us for a few days a while back. He stole some things while he was here and… I had to ask him to leave.’

‘Did he threaten you in any way?’

‘No, not exactly’ Neal admitted. ‘But he was angry when I kicked him out. He made some vague threats I guess, nothing that would make me believe he’d do something like this.’

‘I saw him again. Last week.’ Caitlin said to the officer.

‘Did he make any threats then?’

‘No, but he was angry and he kept saying that blood was thicker than water and that I should side with him against…’ she said, pointing to Neal and Sara.

The officer returned to his little notepad. ‘And you say nobody was home all afternoon.’

‘We left shortly after lunch. Caitlin and I went over to visit my mother at the Blue Skies Nursing Home in New Rochelle and my daughter and Sara were visiting friends in Brooklyn. We got home at the same time.’

Officer Turner stood and tucked his pad in his jacket pocket. ‘All right, why don't you take us through the house and we’ll take a look at the damage.’

WCWCWC

The damage, as it turned out, was minimal. 

Except for the studio which had been literally torn apart. 

The intruder had broken in through the basement window, had crept into the studio and had gone on some sort of frenzied demolition spree. The four sculptures Caitlin had been working on lay in varying stages of completion on a large shelf Neal had built for her and the intruder had done his best to obliterate them. Two of them were clay and he'd used some sort of mallet to shred them to bits. Tiny chunks of dry clay littered the floor, crunching under the officers’ steel toed boots as they stepped in to survey the damage.

One of the sculptures, a wooden free form depiction of a pair of hands had been dented but was still recognizable whereas the glass sculpture of a sea turtle which Caitlin had spent weeks working on had been totally shattered, tiny shards of glass all over the floor.

The damage to Neal’s paintings had been caused by some type of knife. Of the three canvasses which were finished, none of them was recognizable. They had been lying against the wall, waiting for framing but would never be displayed on the third floor of the Raphael Gallery. Both of the canvasses which had been on easels - Neal’s current project and Caitlin’s portrait of Linda, were shredded to bits. Luckily for Hope, her last two pieces had been moved to the gallery just the day before and none of her pieces were in the studio at the time of the break-in. 

The wall had been desecrated with some spray paint although nothing was discernible as far as a message was concerned. Just random squiggles of paint in yellow, black and red - cans which the interloper had found on the shelf at the back of the room where Neal kept supplies. 

Neal stood by the door with one arm around Sara and the other around Caitlin who had begun to shake the moment they’d entered the room. The sight of his beloved studio all but destroyed hit him hard, like a sucker punch to the stomach. His face grew tight, his skin pale as he watched the police officers do a walk around the room, checking the site of the break-in for evidence that might help in identifying the culprit. The window had been smashed, then the latch had been opened to allow for access. There appeared to be a faint footprint by the point of entry, perhaps from some mud from right outside the basement window.

The female officer took a few photographs of the mess and the window frame as well as the footprint by the wall. 

‘Did either of you touch anything?’ the lady cop asked Caitlin and Neal.

Neal shook his head.

‘No…’ Caitlin said hesitantly before speaking up again. ‘Yes’ she corrected. ‘I picked up that wooden sculpture over there and put it back on that shelf.’

The group moved up to the third floor and to Hope’s room where a totally different scene awaited them. Contrary to the basement, there was no devastation but rather a careful placement of a dozen or so panties and bras, obscenely displayed in a heart shape on her bed. On the mirror was a message, jotted down with a couple of the lipsticks Hope kept on her dresser. Half the message was scrawled in the dark pink lipstick Hope favoured. As if the intruder had run out of ‘ink’, he’d grabbed another, this one in a coral shade to finish writing his ominous message.

"Next time, I’ll help you take them off ❤️"

The message which at first sight seemed harmless, maybe even playful, had a menacing ring by virtue of the words ‘next time’. It sounded as if the intruder was threatening to come back, making it, according to the officer, an implied threat.

Hope had been in pure panic mode when she’d seen the note and she’d begun to stutter almost immediately in reaction to the shock. Cam had been the first up to her bedroom, his long legs climbing the stairs three at a time as he responded to her shouts of distress. He’d found her standing dumbfounded in front of the mirror, her hands covering her mouth and shaking like a leaf.

The group returned to the second floor in order to investigate the rooms located there. Liam and Caitlin’s rooms appeared to be untouched but Neal and Sara’s bedroom looked like a hurricane had hit. The large piece of tule which had covered virtually the whole ceiling and the dozens of fairy lights which had been interspersed therein were spread out all over the floor and bed. Adding to the confusion, there was clothing hanging out of the various drawers on both Neal and Sara’s dressers.

The officers exchanged confused glances as they stepped in, wondering what the large swatch of material was all about. Neal spoke up, elucidating the mystery.

‘That’s… I covered the ceiling with tule and fairy lights for… it was a surprise for my wife for Valentine’s Day.’

The female officer whose name tag read ‘Saunders’ looked at her partner with an amused smile on her lips. ‘This… you should put that in your little notebook there, Brian. I’m sure Myriam would love something like that.’

Neal seemed to relax a little and let out a sigh. The other officer frowned at his partner and returned to business.

‘Do you keep valuables in your bedroom? Jewelry, perhaps?’

At the mention of the word, Sara gasped and looked over at Neal. ‘The cameo!’ she shouted.

Neal let his eyes close and shook his head. ‘Jeez… Where did you last see it?’ 

Sara rushed to her dresser and began poking around. ‘I… I left it here on top of the dresser so I wouldn't forget to return it. Did you move it?’ she asked Neal, her voice shrill.

He just shook his head.

‘Is this an expensive cameo?’ the female officer asked.

Sara looked at her husband in horror. Expensive was an understatement.

WCWCWC

There were three other cars in the parking lot of St. Anthony’s church: a blue Mazda Cam recognized as belonging to Marcy and Dave, one of the couples in their marriage preparation class, a white SUV and a Crown Victoria which he and Hope had found out was Father Bertrand’s pride and joy.

The motor was still running, the heater on full blast as Hope and Cam sat in the car, facing each other. It was relatively mild for mid-February but Hope hadn't stopped shaking since they’d left the house and Cam was starting to suspect her tremors had nothing to do with the cool winter air.

‘Babe, we don’t have to go in’ he said, his voice soft.

Hope snivelled and wiped her nose with the sleeve of her winter jacket. ‘No, no. I want to.’

Wanting and doing were two different things and Cam leaned in a little closer, putting his arm around his soon-to-be wife and pulling her in against him.

‘I can go in and explain things to Father Bertrand. I’m sure he’ll understand.’

‘This is silly’ Hope said as tears ran down her face. ’N-n-nothing happened to me. It’s just… words.’

‘That’s not true, sweetie. The guy violated your privacy and if I ever get my hands on him…’

‘Cam! Stop! D-don’t say that. Just… just hold me for a minute, okay?’

‘I’ll hold you as long as you need me to’ he whispered softly into her hair. ‘And then, I’ll hold you some more.’

‘C-C-am…’ she said tentatively.

‘Yes sweetie,’

‘I checked the schedule and you were right.’

‘Right about what?’

‘The class tonight… it is about conflict resolution. I’m sorry I was so… o-o-obstinate.’ 

Cam brought his lips to rest on her head, placing a sweet kiss in her hair and letting out a soft chuckle. 

‘Shhh. It’s okay baby, I think we can afford to miss class this one time. We’ve got that topic covered.’

WCWCWC

Neal lay on his back, staring up at the naked ceiling. He and Sara had agreed to leave their night sky up for a few days in order to fully enjoy the shimmering stars but the person who had so recklessly violated their home had decided differently. 

Sara had finally drifted off after a lot of tossing and turning but tonight, no amount of tossing and turning was going to be enough to shut off Neal’s overactive mind and let him slip into slumber. 

He thought of all the women in his life: his wife who was freaked out about the disappearance of an obscenely expensive brooch, his mom who was lying in a bed not too far away, her life slowing draining from her, his daughter who had totally fallen apart after being personally violated and his foster daughter who was devastated by the turn of events and on the edge of some sort of breakdown. 

He checked the time; it was going on four o’clock and he realized no amount of counting sheep would help him settle. He would try to tackle the problems one at a time. He couldn't do much about what was going on in New Rochelle at this time of night and Hope was safe with Cameron as was Caitlin who he could hear softly snoring down the hall.

The police had promised to look into the main suspect - there was very little doubt in anybody’s mind who the culprit was - but considering no one knew where to find him, it was hit and miss. One thing was for sure, Jesse Davis would want to fence that cameo as quickly as possible if his last theft of the Caffrey home was any indication.

For that, there was something much better than the boys in blue. Neal disentangled himself from his wife and slipped out of bed and down to the first floor. He knew of at least one other person who slept odd hours and he didn't even hesitate to grab the phone and dial.

‘Moz’ he said when the man answered. ‘I need your help. Again.’

TBC


	52. Chapter 52

It had been two days since the break-in and life, at least on the surface, appeared to be returning to normal in the Caffrey household.

Sadly, nothing could be further from the truth.

Hope was a wreck. She’d been having nightmares ever since her personal space had been so cruelly invaded and she’d been refusing to sleep in her bed since the events of Sunday night. She’d spent the first two nights at Cam’s place but had returned home on Tuesday after her workday at the Raphael. When it came time to go to bed, she announced she’d be crashing in Liam’s room, directly across the hall from her parents’ bedroom where, she admitted with trepidation, she would feel safer.

Neal had noticed, when he'd dropped by the gallery earlier in the day, that she was particularly jumpy. The stutter that had plagued her off and on since her brain surgery had reappeared with a vengeance, this at a time when she should be focussed on nothing more than the kind of flowers she wanted for her wedding.

Caitlin, on the other hand, had chosen to focus her energy on getting justice and she was on a rampage. She’d channeled all her anger into searching for her brother, determined to get him to face the consequences of his actions. Jesse had no local permanent address and although he’d been crashing at their mom’s place prior to the break-in, he seemed to have disappeared - or so Jackie Somersby had insisted when her daughter had come at her with all guns blazing.

Neal had tried his best to calm Caitlin, fearful of what she might do if she got her hands on Jesse. The police were on the case, he’d explained, although in truth, he was skeptical that the men in blue would give the break-in more than a cursory investigation. His faith in the police was finite; they had lots more important cases to tend to than a break-in in a suburban home in the quiet neighbourhood of Prospect Park.

His hopes were pinned on Mozzie who was busy calling in favours with his current and ex associates - a strategy that had much better odds of panning out. Although at first Jesse wouldn't know he’d stumbled onto something of such value, he’d find out soon enough when he eventually tried to fence the cameo for cash - along with the other baubles he’d taken from Sara and Hope’s jewelry boxes.

Neal was lying in bed, deep in thought, his mind spinning in all directions when Sara walked in and started to prepare for bed.

‘Neal, I’m worried about her’ she said, reaching for a t-shirt off the armchair by the bed.

Neal arched his eyebrow. He almost asked which ‘her’ she was talking about. Between his mom’s continually declining health, Caitlin wild rampage and Hope’s meltdown, it was anybody’s guess.

‘Hope?’ he asked.

‘She asked me to tuck her in’ Sara said, turning to face him. ‘Tuck her in, Neal! Like she’s five years old.’

‘Honey, it’s just temporary. She’s scared and she just wants to feel safe again. We’ll find Jesse and everything will be all right, you’ll see.’

He didn't quite believe the words himself but he smiled earnestly at his wife in an effort to convince her.

‘At least she didn't ask if she could sleep with us’ he added in an effort to lighten the mood.

It didn't work.

Sara’s face remained sombre. ‘You don’t think this guy will make good on his threat, do you?

‘Look, Jesse is brazen and spiteful but he’s not stupid. He just wanted to rattle our cages, that’s all.’

‘Mission accomplished’ she murmured as she tugged on a pair of yoga pants.

Neal pulled back the blankets, inviting her to slide in next to him. ‘What about you? Have you talked to Piper yet? About the theft?'

Sara slipped in under the covers and reached for the bedside lamp, plunging them in semi-darkness. 

‘No…’ she said tentatively. ‘I told him I couldn’t do the inventory on his Hampton place right now because of what’s happening with Linda. I didn't want to bring up the theft just yet. I keep hoping Mozzie will turn up something.’

‘He will… eventually’ Neal said with confidence. ‘So… Piper was okay with you sending someone else to inventory his country place?’

It appeared Randall Piper was still a touchy subject as far as her husband was concerned. Sara avoided his eyes and settled into his open arms instead, her arm reaching around his waist to snuggle up to him - a loving gesture was always good for a brief reprieve when she knew he wouldn't like what she had to say.

‘He… he says he’s fine with waiting until I can get around to doing it myself. He doesn't want anybody else to do it.’

Neal rolled his eyes in the dark. ‘I’ll just bet’ he muttered under his breath. 

Sara gave him a playful slap on the chest. ‘Honey, don’t be like that. I thought we got past all that… jealousy stuff.’

Neal squeezed her shoulder. ‘Yeah, yeah’ he said half-heartedly.

Truth was, he _wasn't_ over it. But it had moved to the bottom of a very long list of things that were on his mind and he couldn't be bothered getting upset about it. Not when there was so much else to deal with.

‘So, how was she this afternoon?’

This time, the ‘she’ he was referring to needed no further clarification. Sara had visited Linda and with the usual flurry of activity once she’d gotten home, she still hadn't had the chance to brief Neal about it - not that she was particularly eager to do so, considering her mother-in-law’s continuing decline. She wasn't sure how much she wanted to share about her little chat with her mother-in-law. It had been heart wrenching to watch Linda fret about those she loved and would soon be forced to leave behind.

_‘Sara, you need to…to help Neal’ Linda said, stopping every second or two to catch her breath. ‘He’s going to need you.’_

_Sara sat on the edge of her bed, holding her mother-in-law’s hand. ‘Linda, you need to rest, don’t try to talk.’_

_The old woman lifted her hand weakly and shook her head. ‘You need to… listen… to me’ she said, her voice quiet. ‘He’s… he’s going to try… to take care of… of everybody else.’_

_Sara nodded; they both knew the man all too well._

_‘But… you… you’re strong’ Linda continued. ‘Stronger… than him.’_

_She closed her eyes momentarily and Sara could see a small smile forming on her lips. ‘Don’t tell him I said that.’_

_With tremendous effort, Linda forced her eyes open, staring up into Sara’s worried face. She took a deep breath, intent on continuing._

_‘Neal is so lucky… to have you in his life. He loves you so much and he… he’d do anything for you and the kids.’_

_The soft hiss of the oxygen tank continued to compete with Linda’s quivering voice in the otherwise quiet room. Linda took a deep breath and began to cough roughly while Sara waited for her to catch her breath._

_‘He worries about you, you know… so much.’_

_‘What do you mean, he worries about me?’_

_‘He told me… he told me all about this ex-boyfriend of yours. He’s been feeling so insecure lately and he’s been… he’s been tripping all over himself trying to impress you… and to make sure you’re safe.’_

_Sara’s eyes grew in surprise. ‘Neal told you about that?’_

_‘I was pretending to sleep…’ Linda said with a twinkle in her eye. ‘I do that a lot… I just let him talk and he thinks I’m asleep… and he pours his heart out. But don’t tell him that either… I guess it’s cheaper than therapy.’_

_Sara could see that her mother-in-law was valiantly fighting fatigue. But apparently, she wasn't done yet. She wasn't about to give in to the weariness until she’d finished saying what she needed to say._

_‘Neal is… such a gentle soul. He always… he tries to act like things don’t bother him. He’s had to do that a lot in his life… when he was younger. I suppose that’s largely my fault’ she added with a tone of regret._

_‘That’s not true Linda. Neal loves you and he’s forgiven you for everything that happened when he was a child.’_

_Once again, Linda raised her hand, silently asking Sara to listen; she had something to say and she was running out of time to say it. She took a couple of deep breaths and soldiered on. She signalled Sara to come closer and she let her already weak voice grow even softer._

_‘Neal acts like things don’t bother him, but it’s all… one big deception.’_

_Sara nodded and grinned; she knew Neal Caffrey better than most._

_Linda Bennett got a faraway look in her eyes. ‘He is the most …gentle soul I’ve ever met. When he… when he was about four years old… he… he became fascinated with ants.’_

_Sara’s face relaxed as she listened. She loved hearing stories about Neal when he was a kid. Linda’s voice was weak and barely more than a whisper but that didn't keep her from carrying on with her little stroll down memory lane and Sara wasn't about to interrupt her._

_‘We were living over on Mulholland…in an old rundown apartment. We were infested with ants that summer… you know, those little carpenter ants.’_

_Sara nodded._

_‘He started to treat them like household pets’ Linda said with a quiet giggle. ‘He would sit in the middle of the kitchen floor… with some crumbs… and try to get them to come to him.’_

_Sara chuckled. ‘He wouldn’t let me… kill any of them. Every… every time we found one… or five or ten…he would run and get a sheet of paper and… scoop… scoop them all up and carry them outside. I would hear him from the kitchen window… talking to them, giving them all names: Adam… Arthur… Adrian… Avery… all names starting with the letter A.’_

_Linda smiled at the memory, her gaze growing distant. ‘He made me promise not to kill a single one… or he said he’d refuse to eat his vegetables.’_

_Sara squeezed Linda’s hand gently. ‘That does sound like Neal. We had squirrels in the attic once and he would only deal with one of those ‘green’ companies, you know the ones who use live traps to deal with vermin’ she said, complete with air quotes._

_Linda’s face grew serious. ‘He’s… going to need you Sara’ she said breathlessly. ‘And so is Caitlin. I’m counting on_ you _to be strong.’_

_‘I will Linda, I promise… I’ll be there for him… and for Caitlin’ Sara said, tears in her eyes._

_Linda let her eyes drift shut, visibly exhausted as Sara fought to keep from sobbing. This woman who had only come back into their lives a few short years before was such an integral part of their family and a tower of strength. She was a moral compass for Neal, a loving grandma for Hope, Liam and Caitlin and a true friend to her. Despite the fact that Linda’s body was slowly giving out, her spirit was stronger than ever._

‘Sara?’ Neal said, interrupting her thoughts.

‘What?’

‘My mom… how was she?’

‘She was calm. She asked to see Hope tomorrow. Do you think she’s up to it?’

‘I’ll go with her, make sure she’s okay’ Neal offered without hesitation.

‘Did she eat anything?’ he asked, afraid of the answer.

Sara propped herself up on one elbow so she could look at his face in the dim lit room.

‘No… sorry, I couldn't get her to eat anything at all. She was awake for about five minutes after the nurse came in to check on her but she slept pretty well the rest of the time.’

Neal sighed loudly. ‘She’s just going to keep getting weaker and weaker.’

Sara could feel the pain radiating off her husband, the angst seeping from every one of his pores. She ran her hand down his side, pulling him towards her in a warm embrace.

‘Neal, she’s ready’ she whispered. ‘We’re going to have to prepare ourselves… to let her go.’

WCWCWC

There are moments in life when you know damn well you’re about to make the wrong decision - or you realize you’re about to stumble into the wrong place at the wrong time. And yet, you can’t seem to help yourself from stepping resolutely in the giant pile of shit that’s lying in plain sight, right at your feet.

For Liam Caffrey, this was one of those times.

When Todd had called to invite him over to his place for coffee, alarm bells had started to go off in Liam’s head. But Todd was still getting back on his feet and although he’d hesitated at first, Liam hadn’t had the heart to refuse him in his hour of need. Todd had sounded needy on the phone and in the past, that desperation had always led to places Liam was no longer prepared to go. Despite his ambivalence, Liam had accepted the invitation, making sure to sandwich the visit between two classes and praying to all hell Monica would also be there to keep things from getting too awkward.

Alas, that was not to be.

Now, they sat face to face in the small apartment Todd shared with his sister, drinking instant coffee from chipped mugs and Liam was wishing he’d been smart enough to decline the invite. The conversation, which had begun rather benignly with Todd inquiring about their mutual friends and sharing his excitement at returning to classes, seemed to be veering into very uncomfortable and dangerous territory - namely their previous relationship and what might have been. Liam’s attempts at keeping the conversation in safe terrain were failing spectacularly and he'd begun to plot his exit strategy - ASAFP.

‘Liam, what happened to us? We were so good together’ Todd said, his voice full of emotion.

‘Look, we’ve been through all this… a _few_ times’ Liam replied, forcing himself to keep looking into the other man’s sad puppy dog eyes.

Todd brought his chair a little closer and moved his hand to cover Liam’s, his eyes pleading. Liam immediately pulled away as if he’d just laid his hand on a hot stove but apparently, Todd wasn't done grovelling.

‘Tell me again why this can’t work’ he said, his voice unsteady.

‘Please… please don’t do this, Todd. I’ve tried my best to be honest with you. It’s over between us. We can never be anything more than friends.’

Todd’s demeanour grew agitated and his voice louder. ‘What is it Liam? Is it Cody? Are you back with him?’

Liam let out a long slow breath. ‘No, no, I’m not. I told you… this has nothing to do with Cody. I just… I can’t be with you anymore.’

This was like having to break up all over again and Liam eyed the door to the apartment, eager to make a hasty getaway. Todd sat, blocking his view, uncomfortably close with his eyes pleading, his shoulders slumped.

Options for a graceful escape were few and far between. He could try to talk him down but Todd was one of the most perseverant people he’d ever met - except maybe for his mom. Physically pushing him away seemed like an over the top solution - did he really have it in him to use physical force on an emotionally fragile man? He needed to find a way to disengage himself from the delicate situation while still leaving Todd with a shred of dignity.

But the guy wasn't making it easy on him.

Tears appeared in Todd’s eyes. ‘I don’t understand… it was always so easy between us… Liam, I miss you.’

Liam sighed and shook his head. ‘It _was_ good… but things change and I… why are you making me hurt you all over again? I don’t want to…’

‘Then don’t’ Todd pleaded. ‘I love you… and I want to be with you.’

Liam swallowed hard. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt this man who'd already suffered so much. Todd moved in even closer, his hand reaching to touch Liam’s cheek, caressing it lovingly. Intent on keeping things from going any further, Liam instinctively pulled back but Todd had other ideas. He leaned in closer, curling his hand around Liam’s neck and moving in to kiss him. Liam gasped and jumped to his feet, doing his best to break the contact.

‘Stop it! Please! This can’t happen Todd’ he said, his voice firm.

But Todd would not be dissuaded. He rose alongside Liam and crowded him up against the wall, moving in to kiss him and pushing his body up against him.

‘I love you’ he repeated, his voice shaky.

At six foot two and one hundred and ninety pounds, Liam was a strong, muscular guy but Todd matched him inch for inch, pound for pound. Although he could certainly fight him off in a pinch, Liam hesitated, worried about upsetting him - and yet, he couldn’t let this act of desperation and delusion go on any longer. He settled for placing his hands against the other man’s chest and pushing him gently but decisively away, managing to slip from Todd’s grasp and creating some much needed space between them. 

‘Todd, listen to me. I care about what happens to you, I really do… but you’re asking me for something I just can’t give you.’

‘Liam… please’ he said in desperation, playing his trump card. ‘Just once more…for old times sake. Then I promise, I’ll leave it alone.’

He took a step closer, closing the gap between them but Liam stood his ground, his arms extended to keep Todd from getting close enough to touch him.

‘I’m sorry, Todd. I don’t want to hurt you but I’d end up doing that if we ever go there again.’

‘No you wouldn’t. Just one more time… please’ he begged, reaching for Liam.

Liam had begun to inch his way towards the door, feeling like a coward as he attempted to slip away.

‘I’m sorry. Truly I am’ he said as he reached the door. He forced himself to look into the other man’s face, tears now flowing freely down his cheeks.

‘I hope you get better Todd, I really do but I don’t think we should see each other again.’

He pulled his eyes away from the look of pain on Todd’s face and reached for the doorknob, opening the door without hesitation. He was unable to look back but as he left, he murmured softly.

‘I’m sorry.’

He practically ran out the door and down the hallway all the way to the street, not daring to slow down until he felt the cold air hitting his face and making him flinch.

‘Fuck!’ he muttered under his breath.

WCWCWC

Jackie Somersby opened the door to her apartment and stared bleary-eyed at her daughter standing there.

‘Rough night Mom?’ an angry Caitlin said as she stormed past her, uninvited.

Jackie stared back in shock. ‘I was out with a few… Why the hell are you here again Caitlin?’

She pulled her robe tighter around her and walked to the kitchen of the tiny apartment, opening the refrigerator and pretending to peruse its contents.

‘You can stop with the distractions Mom. I know you know where he’s hiding out.’

Without waiting for an answer, Caitlin began a search of the apartment - which took all of thirty seconds, considering the size of the place - bathroom, one bedroom and an open living space.

Jackie continued to look away, pretending to study the slim pickings inside her fridge.

‘Honey, you can’t keep doing this to me…’ she muttered, ‘…pitting me against your brother like this.’

Caitlin stopped moving around the room and grabbed her mom’s arm, forcing her to look at her.

‘Mom, Jesse broke into the Caffreys' place!’ she shouted. ‘He terrorized Hope, stole from Sara and destroyed all my art and Mr. C’s stuff too. He’s an asshole! Why are you protecting him?’

Jackie rolled her eyes; the Caffreys had never been her priority and never would be.

‘Caffreys, Caffreys, Caffreys!’ she shouted back. ‘That’s all you ever talk about. Do you have any idea how that makes me and your brother feel?’

She put her hand up to her head as if to try to contain the hangover that was obviously plaguing her.

Caitlin stared her down, her face growing angrier. ‘Well, maybe if I had a family who wasn't a bunch of boozy crooks, I’d be more inclined to stand up for you.’

Jackie glared back, her eyes narrowing as if she’d just suffered a sharp slap in the face. Somewhere deep inside she knew her daughter was right. But family was family and, although she felt torn, she couldn't turn on her son. 

‘Mom, do you know what he did to Hope?’

Jackie stood there, listening.

‘He took out her underwear and placed it on her bed like some sort of sexual predator. She’s been a wreck ever since. She’s getting married in a few weeks and instead of getting ready for what should be the most special day in her life, she’s looking over her shoulder to make sure he’s not coming after her.’

‘Jesse would never hurt anybody —’

‘Oh no?’ Caitlin replied, voice dripping with sarcasm. ‘Like he didn't hurt that guy he beat up on that robbery while he was in Florida? Or what about the time he broke into that old lady’s place and pointed a gun at her while he robbed her blind.’

Jackie grew quiet; her son was no angel, that was for sure. Caitlin took a step closer, getting right in her mother’s face. ‘Where is he, Mom?’ she demanded.

‘I… I really don't know honey. He called me two nights ago. Said he was planning on leaving town…’

‘Are you telling me the truth?’ Caitlin asked, her voice beyond angry.

Jackie nodded sheepishly.

‘If I find out you’re lying to me, you’ll never see me again. Do you understand?’

Again, Jackie nodded and nervously tugged at the neckline of her robe.

‘If you hear from him, you tell him I’m looking for him and when I find him, I’m going to take his balls and squeeze them so hard his eyes will pop out of his head.’

She turned on her heels and slammed the door on the way out.

WCWCWC

Jesse Davis stood outside of Regency Jewellers and watched, assessing as best he could the kind of place it was. It was always a risk when you got something appraised; it might set off alarm bells for knowledgeable staff on the lookout for stolen goods. One thing was for sure, this place was a far cry from Ron’s Pawn Shop down in Florida where he pawned most of his ill-gotten goods. Ron and his staff didn't give a rat’s ass where stuff came from and customers always left with a smile on their face and cash in their pocket.

He tugged on the tie he’d bought at the thrift shop, careful to cover what appeared to be a gravy stain and he ran his hand through his hair. He had to look the part if he didn't want to raise suspicions. A rather large, hoity-toity woman with bluish-grey hair stepped out, carrying a small gift bag and climbed into a waiting cab.

He wanted a proper appraisal, not a quick sale. It would look fishy if he tried to ‘pawn’ something in a place like this - better to fence it on the street once he knew it’s actual value. Most times, Jesse could estimate how much things were worth but this piece was unique and he’d actually gone to the library and looked up cameos to begin his education. It hadn't done him much good - some of the cameos he found online were cheap knockoffs while others were worth a small fortune. One thing was for sure, the brooch hadn't been on Sara Ellis’ dresser the last time he’d ransacked the place a few weeks back, of that he was certain. This was a more recent acquisition and from what he’d learned about Caffrey, the man and his wife had discriminating tastes if not modest means. Only a professional with a discerning eye would be able to tell him what this thing was worth.

With one last tug of his jacket, he crossed the street and stepped into the jewelry shop, hoping for good news.

WCWCWC

‘Anything?’ Neal asked from his desk at the school of art.

‘Not yet’ came Mozzie’s response on the other end of the line. ‘But I put the word out that the FBI was on the lookout for an expensive cameo and that whoever tried to fence it would be in for some major grief. That way, our little thief will be desperate for a sale and will only be too happy to deal with me when the walls start closing in on him. You said he hangs out at the Roxy, right?’

‘That’s what Caitlin said.’

‘I asked the bartender to be on the lookout for him; he owes me’ Mozzie added, sounding rather proud of himself.

‘Right, thanks Moz’ Neal said with a loud sigh. ‘Keep me posted, okay?’

WCWCWC

Jesse stepped out onto the street with a huge grin on his face. It had taken all he had to keep from screaming at the top of his lungs when the man behind the counter had given him the news.

‘My aunt Rita recently passed away’ Jesse had told him solemnly as the older man looked on with sympathy. ‘Cancer… it’s a damn plague, if you ask me.’

‘I’m sorry to hear that.’

Jesse smiled soberly and nodded. ‘She was rather well off and… well, she didn't have any children of her own… always said it was the biggest regret of her life. Anyway, I’m sure you don't want to hear my whole life story.’

He took out the cameo and placed it gingerly on the counter in front of the jeweller, watching carefully as the man began to examine it. ‘She left all her jewelry to my sister and I told her I’d give her a hand to have things appraised. Poor thing, she’s pretty broken up.’

The man glanced down at the brooch, reaching for an eyeglass to better examine it. It didn't escape Jesse’s scrutiny that the older gentleman’s eyes became animated as he began to study the piece of jewelry that was in his hand.

‘Well, your aunt had excellent taste. This is a very unique piece. It has all the markings of a cameo from the mid 1700s… Victorian. Very rare indeed. Do you have any idea where she got this piece?’

Jesse hesitated for a moment, trying desperately to avoid any potential land mines. ‘To be honest, she was quite a collector. I’m not sure where she might have gotten it from’ he replied with a conman smile. 

‘Well, this piece would be worth several tens of thousands of dollars’ the man said, studying Jesse’s reaction.

It had taken everything he had for Jesse not to start jumping around yelling ‘hee haw’ at the top of his lungs while he did a happy dance. Instead, he nodded soberly and gave a quiet ‘Wow, I had no idea’.

The jeweller wasn't about to mention a specific amount. Maybe the young man would agree to sell it to him and the shop could make a tidy profit.

‘You know we have a vintage section in the store’ the man said, pointing to a counter at the back of the shop. ‘If you have an interest in selling it, we would be pleased to make you an offer. That is, if you have the original paperwork on its provenance.’

Jesse nodded as if considering the offer - which he wasn’t. Having a hot item in the hands of a reputable shop was way too risky. It was out of the question.

‘Cynthia isn't looking to sell’ he said as the man frowned.

‘Oh, that’s my sister. She was very close to Aunt Anita.’

‘I thought you said your aunt’s name was Rita?’ the man said.

Jesse was quick on his feet, letting out a small chuckle to give himself the necessary time to recoup. ‘It is. Her name was Anita but she preferred going by her middle name so most of us called her Aunt Rita.’

The man frowned then nodded. Jesse thought it might help to feed the man another few bites of malarkey just for credibility’s sake. ‘She was our dad’s younger sister’ he said. ‘He died four years ago from lung cancer… worked as a coal miner in Wisconsin when he was younger.’

He looked down at the floor melodramatically and coughed. ‘I still miss him every day.’

Now that he’d gotten what he’d come for, Jesse was more than eager to get the hell out of there before he got tripped up again. He took the brooch from the man’s hand and wrapped it in tissue paper, returning it to his pocket.

‘Why don’t you leave me your sister’s name?’ the jeweller said. ‘Maybe I can get in touch with her and try to talk her into parting with this lovely piece.’

‘Thanks for your help’ Jesse said, ignoring the other man’s request. ‘I’ll let my sister know about the offer.’

The man watched Jesse leave, studying the strange young man as his suspicions escalated.

Perhaps a quick call to the local police was in order.

TBC


	53. Chapter 53

‘I’m sorry… I know it’s really late.’

‘It’s okay. What time is it anyway?’

The voice on the other end was rough and groggy and Liam felt a familiar stirring deep in the pit of his stomach. 

‘What’s wrong? Is it your grandmother?’ Cody asked in response to the silence on the other end of the line.

Liam tucked his long legs under his body and settled on top of the blankets on his bed, his back tucked up against the headboard.

‘No, no… it’s not my grandmother. It’s me. Cody, I’ve made a real mess of things.’

‘Does this have something to do with Sir Todd?’ Cody asked, his voice clearer now - clear enough for Liam to pick up on the sarcasm.

‘I just want to do the right thing, you know. But I keep messing up.’

‘What’d you do?’ There was a slight pause before Cody continued. ‘You didn’t… sleep with him again, did you?’

Liam couldn't help but pick up on the bitterness in his ex’s voice. 

‘NO! NO! Of course not!’ he cried out - as if the notion was impossible to fathom. Truth was he’d given in to his lust-filled urges on more occasions than he cared to remember where Todd Greenway was concerned. But that was all in the past and he had no intention - or interest - in ever going back there.

‘I thought he and I could be friends… that I could help him get back on his feet. But he can’t seem to let go of the past.’

Liam could hear the rustling of sheets on the line and he got a visual of Cody resituating himself on the bed. He could imagine his face; his features a mix of concern and annoyance at having to hear the details of Liam’s relationship with another man.

‘So what happened? Exactly.’

‘He called and invited me over coffee.’

‘Coffee…’ Cody repeated, deadpan and Liam could almost see the smirk on his face from across the miles. ‘Seriously?’

Liam shrugged off the cynicism in the other man’s voice; maybe calling him had been another massive mistake. ‘Yes, coffee. I hesitated at first but he sounded so down in the dumps and I know this whole break-up thing hasn’t been easy for him.’

‘So you went over to his place for coffee.’

‘Yeah. I picked a time just before I had a class so I’d have an excuse to leave if things got too weird.’

‘You could have just told him you had a class.’

‘You don’t know Todd… he knows my class schedule by heart and every room my classes are in.’

‘Lovely’ Cody said under his breath.

‘I thought if we only had half an hour, things wouldn't get too far out of hand. And lately, he's been good about keeping the boundaries I set for him.’

‘Boundaries?’ Cody said with just a hint of skepticism.

‘Would you please stop interrupting and being so cynical’ Liam blurted out. That seemed to shut Cody up, at least momentarily.

‘And he sort of hinted Monica would be there.’

‘Monica? Did you turn him straight, Caffrey?’

Liam rolled his eyes. He should have know better; Cody could never resist teasing him at the best of times. What had he been thinking calling his ex to confide about the goings on with his… other ex.

‘That’s his sister, smart ass. They got a place together off campus. Anyway… she wasn't there and I started to hear alarm bells.’ 

‘That’s when you started to hear alarm bells?’

Liam ignored the sarcasm and carried on - it was that or hang up. And hearing Cody’s voice even when he was teasing him mercilessly was like putting balm on a fresh cut.

‘Okay, okay, I admit it. It was stupid of me to go over. I know how vulnerable he is and he’s made no secret of the fact he wants us to get back together again.’

Cody listened - no wisecracks.

‘I’m not used to this ‘ex thing’. After you and I broke up, I moved away and I didn't have to cope with any… lingering feelings.’

‘You didn't have lingering feelings for me after we broke up?’ Cody asked, sounding wounded.

‘Of course I did. What I mean is we didn't have to keep bumping into each other. And… we’d made the decision together, nobody got dumped.’

There was silence on the other end of the line and Liam wished he could be sitting in front of his ex so he could see his face right now.

‘But Todd just can’t seem to let it go. There’s always that undercurrent of…’

‘Lust?’ Cody said deadpan.

Liam scoffed. ‘He’s just a really… passionate guy.’

‘All right, this is kind of going over the line even for us. Did you really call me to tell me how passionate your ex-boyfriend is?’

There was genuine annoyance in the man’s voice and Liam smirked. Surely that was a sign that Cody still had feelings for him.

‘No, of course not. I just need your advice. You always give… good advice.’

He thought he heard Cody smiling from across the miles.

‘I told him we couldn't be friends anymore… but what I really meant was that he can’t handle us being just friends. Cody, you should have seen his face. He was crushed.’

There was silence for a moment. ‘Maybe I should transfer out to another college, come back to New York…’

Cody came alive. ‘Yeah, I don't think the Orange is ready to let their star rookie off the hook. Look, there’s gotta be a better way.’

‘You should have seen his face, Cody. I felt so guilty being the one to make him feel that way. He’s not a bad person… he’s just not the guy for me.’ 

‘I’m sure it’s not all that bad, babe —’

The corners of Liam’s mouth shot up. ‘Did you just call me ‘babe’?’ 

There was an audible sigh on the other end of the line. ‘Sorry… force of habit.’

‘No apology needed’ Liam replied, smile still firmly in place. ‘I like it when you call me babe.’

‘Yeah, well, buddies don’t call each other that.’

‘Buddies? Is that what we are?’

Cody seemed uncomfortable and quickly changed the subject. ‘So what are you going to do about it?’

‘I thought I could try to transfer to another section of my Economics class, that’s the only class we share. That way I don’t have to see him staring at me from across the room.’

‘That makes sense. Will they give you a section change for personal reasons?’

‘I could try to talk to my professor, he’s a good guy… and a big basketball fan. There’s like sixteen sections, I’m sure one will fit my schedule.’

‘It’s worth a try. That would take the pressure off. What about the rest of the time?’

‘It’s a big campus and he's living offsite now. I’m sure I could avoid him if I’m careful.’

Cody grew quiet.

‘Cody…’

‘Yeah’ he replied, his voice quiet as if snapping out of some deep thought - or maybe he’d inadvertently fallen back to sleep. ‘So you’re really done with Todd? You’re sure.’

‘I’m positive. I know you said there were no guarantees for us but… no matter what happens between the two of us, Todd is not who I want to be with.’

Liam could hear Cody moving around on the bed and he conjured up the image of him, stretched out with his arm under his head. His heart began to beat a little faster as he imagined himself lying there beside him.

He heard a yawn and Cody spoke up.

‘Look, not that I’m not enjoying this but I’ve got a class first thing in the morning…’

‘Yeah, yeah sure’ Liam said, suddenly feeling sad. ‘Thanks for listening. I know this isn't exactly… normal stuff.’

‘When have you ever considered us ‘normal’? Look, get some sleep, things will look brighter in the morning and… call me tomorrow and let me know how it’s going. Maybe we can chat about something other than your ex.’

Liam chuckled. ‘All right, good night’ he said, his voice dropping. ‘Oh and Cody…’

‘Yeah?’

‘I really do like it when you call me babe.’

WCWCWC

Early signs of spring were already in the air despite the snow still lingering on the ground. The nights were still bitterly cold but during the day, the sun was gaining strength and the hours of daylight were growing with each passing day. 

It was well past noon by the time Neal stepped into the Raphael to pick up his daughter and he was surprised to find Peter alone with one of the part-timers.

‘Hey!’ Peter called out at the sight of his best friend.

He rose from his desk to meet Neal half-way, noticing the despondent look on his face - one that was all too common lately. For some reason he could not explain, Peter felt compelled to open up his arms and, without hesitation, Neal stepped into the older man’s embrace, his arms instantly wrapping around him as he hugged him back.

When they pulled apart, Peter looked into his eyes. ‘Rough day?’

Neal shrugged and suddenly he looked like the fresh-faced young man who’d handed him a lollipop in front of the First Unity Bank in midtown Manhattan all those years ago.

‘Seems they’re all rough lately’ he conceded.

‘Any news about our thief?’

‘Not yet. Mozzie’s on the lookout for anybody looking to fence a cameo brooch. Unless Jesse ends up leaving town, I’m pretty sure he’ll pop up on our radar at some point.’

‘If anybody can do it…’ Peter began. ‘I called in a few favours with the NYPD, maybe that'll pay off.’

Neal nodded. ‘Thanks.’

He looked around the gallery; it was quiet and there were no signs of his daughter or her fiancé. ‘Is Hope here? I’m supposed to pick her up and take her over to New Rochelle to visit my mom.’

Peter noticed Neal’s voice trembling; it seemed thoughts of Linda were constantly on his mind these days.

‘She and Cam are just grabbing a bite of lunch at the café’ he said pointing in the general direction of their neighbourhood eatery. ‘They should be back any minute. So… any changes with your mom?’

‘No… but every day she seems to be getting weaker. She’s barely awake most days.’

Neal grew pensive. ‘She asked specifically to see Hope today. I get the feeling she’s making the rounds… saying goodbye to everyone, one by one.’

‘How’s Sara holding out?’

‘Sara?’ Neal said, sounding surprised at the question. ‘Sara’s a rock. I don’t know what I’d do without her.’

‘I know what you mean’ Peter said, thoughts of El appearing out of nowhere.

Both men had lucked out when it came to marrying strong, independent women and they were smart enough to know it. While some might go so far as to describe the two of them as ‘pussy whipped’ husbands, they preferred to think of themselves as confident men, wise enough to have chosen life partners who were both strong and secure - in many ways, stronger than they were. 

‘So… have you settled on a date? To stop working.’

Peter’s face grew dark; most days he tried not to think about leaving the life he loved at the Raphael. But a promise was a promise and he was determined to make the best of it.

‘Early June’ he murmured. ‘If that’s still okay with you.’

‘Yeah, of course.’ Neal replied, pasting a phoney smile on his face. He hated the thought of walking into the gallery someday and not seeing Peter’s face smiling up at him. 

‘Cam’s been trying to convince me not to bother hiring an outside firm to do the bookkeeping. He seems to think he could handle the finances by himself.’

‘He’s a smart kid, there’s no doubt about it. You know what you could do Neal? You could hire someone to do the actual statements and bank reconciliations and give Cameron responsibility for the day to day bookkeeping. He’s got a good head on his shoulders… and I’d be glad to coach him if you like.’

Neal nodded; that sounded like a good compromise. They were interrupted by the jiggling of the bell over the door, heralding the arrival of newcomers, immediately followed by the sound of Cam’s deep voice and a soft giggle coming from his betrothed. 

‘Daddy!’ Hope called out as she ran to Neal and threw her arms around his neck.

Suddenly, she was three years old again, hanging on to his neck in the lake at the cottage they rented every summer, her shivering body holding on for dear life. He was still her protector, her hero and if he lived to be a hundred years old, he always would be.

‘Hey sweet pea’ he replied, leaning into the embrace. ‘Ready to go?’

Her blue eyes shimmered and he thought he spotted tears forming. ‘Yeah, I’m ready.’

WCWCWC

The Roxy was a grubby little hole in the wall in the Meatpacking District which, sadly, Mozzie knew all too well. When it came to his propensity for all things alcoholic, he wasn't particularly picky - except, of course, in the case of fine red wine of which he fancied himself quite the connoisseur. 

But a boilermaker was a boilermaker no matter where you chose to imbibe. It was a drink that could be ordered in any tavern, bar, pub, watering hole, gin joint, saloon or speakeasy on the eastern seaboard and Mozzie secretly liked the sound of its name: boilermaker. It was tough sounding, the kind of thing gangsters and hoodlums ordered in those old black and white movies.

‘Hit me with a boilermaker’ he said, letting his voice drop an octave. He took a seat at the bar and settled in to watch for Jesse Davis. 

‘You sure you’ve seen him around?’ he asked Rashid, the bartender while the man tended to his order.

‘He was here yesterday and the day before’ the man answered.

Mozzie spotted Creepy Eddie in a booth towards the back of the bar and gave him a cursory wave of his hand. He’d been one of the twenty or so fences he’d put the word out to, warning them that the FBI was on the lookout for a very specific item. He’d explained in great detail that the cameo brooch had been stolen from a top end jewelry shop in Greenwich Village and that the Feds were on the lookout for it. Anybody caught playing hot potato with it was in for a lot of grief.

‘Did you see who he was sitting with?’ Mozzie asked, slipping the guy a couple of Andrew Jacksons. 

‘Seriously Mozzie?’ the man said with an eye wag.

Mozzie reached into his pocket and pulled out two more bills which he added to small stack on top of the bar. ‘You’re killing me Rashid’ he muttered.

‘Yesterday, he was sitting over there with Big Ass Floyd’ the man said, pointing.

Big Ass Floyd, so nicknamed for his large caboose which resembled the back side of a freight train, hadn’t been on Mozzie’s list of contacts. Let’s just say there was no love lost between the two men. The guy had once ripped Mozzie off when Moz had unloaded a fancy pair or Cartier cufflinks - although it was entirely Mozzie’s fault for not doing his homework properly. Once the exchange had been finalized, Neal had informed him that the things were worth at least four times what Mozzie had gotten for them. Since then, Big Ass was best avoided at all costs. 

‘Were they doing business?’

The guy shrugged and Mozzie pulled out another couple of bills with a loud sigh of frustration. 

‘This better be worth it’ he grumbled.

‘They chatted. Your guy showed him something on his phone. But Big Ass left right after.’

Mozzie nodded and took a sip of beer. His eyes continued to roam around the bar, recognizing the odd face here and there and giving a brief head nod or wave of the hand. 

He was well into his third beer when the door opened and in waltzed Jesse Davis, looking cocky as all hell. As expected, Jesse made his way to the back of the bar and slipped in across from Creepy Eddie who glanced nervously in Mozzie’s direction before turning his attention to the young man.

From where he sat, Mozzie could see Jesse pulling something out from his coat pocket. The other man reached under the table and began examining the items which were not discernible from Mozzie’s vantage point. He watched Eddie slip some cash under the table along with a rejected item Mozzie could only hope was the coveted brooch. Jesse became agitated, arguing with the man; it took but a minute for Eddie to get to his feet and with a salute, walk away, leaving Jesse frustrated and frankly, looking rather pissed off.

‘Thanks for the tip Mozzie. I owe you one’ Eddie muttered as he sauntered past the bar.

The kid remained sitting in the booth, staring down into his beer, looking bent out of shape. If there was ever a time to make a move, this was it. Mozzie picked up his drink and slithered down the bar towards his table, not bothering to wait for an invitation before he sat himself down.

‘Can I help you?’ Jesse said, voice dripping with sarcasm.

‘No. But I think I can help you’ Mozzie replied, summoning his inner thug. ‘I might have a buyer for that item you’ve been flashing all over town.’

Jesse looked up, the disappointment morphing into brashness once more. ‘Oh yeah?’

WCWCWC

‘Honey, could you go get me a cup of tea?’ Linda asked as Neal hovered by her bedside.

He frowned. If she wanted a cup of tea, he would more than gladly get her a cup of tea but somehow, his intuition was telling him this sudden interest in orange pekoe had nothing to do with tea and everything to do with stealing a few moments alone with her granddaughter. After all, Linda Bennett had a little bit of the con in her; in the case of the Caffrey-Bennett family, it seemed the apple hadn't fallen far from the tree.

‘Of course’ he said, leaning down to place a kiss on her forehead. ‘I’ll be right back.’

‘No hurry’ she whispered, confirming his suspicion. 

As soon as Neal had slipped out, Linda pointed to the glass of water sitting on her bedside table and Hope got to her feet to fetch it for her.

‘Here you go Grandma’ she said, taking a minute to put a couple of extra pillows under her grandmother’s head.

The old lady smiled and took a small sip of water, triggering a coughing fit.

‘Would you do something for me sweetheart?’ she asked, her voice halting.

Hope took a seat next to her on the bed ‘Sure.’

‘Will you come here and lie beside me?’

WCWCWC

Neal made his way to the small self-serve area by the nursing station. He filled the kettle with water and began to poke around the variety of teas available to the residents and their guests.

‘She likes chamomile the best’ came a voice behind him.

He turned to find his mom’s primary nurse, a woman by the name of Heather.

‘Hi Heather’ he said, pointing to the mug in his hand. ‘My mom asked me to get her some tea but somehow, I think she just wanted a few minutes alone with my daughter.’

The woman nodded and perched herself on the edge of a nearby table. Part of her job - the painfully sad part - was helping families prepare for the imminent death of their loved ones. She could see the pain in Neal’s eyes, a look she knew all too well.

‘She seems to be coughing a lot’ he said. ‘More and more.’

‘It’s time to up her meds but that’ll mean she’ll be less alert. She asked for another couple of days before we start her on the hard stuff.’

Neal’s eyebrows narrowed, forming a V. 

‘The more we increase her medication, the less lucid she’ll become and she’s trying to hang on for another couple of days.’

‘She said that?’

The nurse nodded. ‘No disrespect but she’s one tough old bird, your mother.’

Neal smiled sadly; Linda Bennett had been through an awful lot in her life and apparently, she was determined to leave this earth on her terms and nobody else’s. 

‘I’ve been noticing some blood in her mucus when she coughs.’

Heather nodded. ‘Her body can’t fight it anymore, Mr. Caffrey. She’s subsisting on some very basic medication, a few sips of water here and there and… sheer will.’

Neal frowned as he listened. 

‘We’ll need to start medicating her more aggressively… with morphine. But that will affect her ability to stay lucid and she’ll no longer be aware of her surroundings.’

‘How much time?’

‘A couple of days at best. If you have family members who’d like to see her before it’s too late, now would be a good time.’

Neal thought of Liam who had just returned to Syracuse three days earlier. Should he ask him to come back? 

He pretended to fuss with the teabag, hoping she wouldn't notice he was tearing up. No such luck. She brought her hand to rest on his back and gave it a soothing pat.

‘I know it’s not easy to watch someone die. But we should be thankful Mrs. Bennett is doing it on her own terms, not everyone is able to do that.’

Neal poured a few drops of milk into the tea he knew she would never drink. He cleared his throat and looked at the woman who faced this kind of thing practically on a daily basis.

There was nothing left to say.

WCWCWC

Hope lay on her side in the small bed next to her grandmother, her bum hanging over the edge. She could feel the heat radiating off the woman’s fevered body as she placed her hand gently on hers, caressing her knuckles lovingly. She felt something hard in the palm of her hand and she took a peek, recognizing her brother’s good luck pebble.

‘Liam will be glad to know his good luck charm is being put to good use’ she said.

Linda stroked it with her thumb, feeling the smoothness and firmness of it.

‘It’s hard… and tough but it’s soft… and smooth. It’s like an… analogy for life… It helps keep me…focussed’ she said breathlessly.

‘Honey, I need you… to do something… for me.’

‘Of course Grandma. Anything.’

‘Liam’s going to be sad… he wasn't here. He’s like your dad… so sweet and gentle. And so sensitive. You need to tell him... tell him I know.’

Hope remained silent. ‘I don’t want him to feel bad. Promise me you’ll make sure to tell him I know.’

‘I promise Grandma.’

‘I hope he makes up with his young man’ she added wistfully. ‘Those two are suited to each other like… like bread and butter.’

‘Bread and butter, huh?’ Hope said with a soft laugh. ‘I’ll let him know you think of him as a chunk of sourdough bread.’

‘Liam? No, he’s the butter, sweet, smooth, a little salty…’

‘That’s one mighty big stick of butter’ Hope joked as she thought of her six-foot-two brother.

Linda’s eyes closed and she forced them open for a brief moment. 

‘Now’ she said with a huge sigh. ‘Tell me about your wedding day.’

‘W-what do you mean?’

Linda smiled wistfully. ‘Sweetheart… we both know I’m not going to… be there. I want you to tell me… everything. And I’ll just close my eyes and imagine it.’

Hope sighed and a sad smile appeared on her lips as she was transported forward to the day she and Cam would finally join their destinies. 

‘It’ll be a nice warm sunny day…’

‘Tell it like… like it’s happening right now’ Linda murmured without bothering to open her eyes. 

‘Okay…’ Hope said with a chuckle. ‘It’s a beautiful late spring day. There’s a garden in front of the church with spring flowers and there’s just a bit of a cool breeze in the air.’

‘What kind?’ Linda whispered.

‘What kind of what?’

‘Flowers. What… kind of flowers?’

Hope chuckled; it seemed her grandmother wanted all the details. ‘Bright yellow daffodils and pink tulips.’

‘And crocuses?’ Linda added. ‘I… I… love crocuses.’

‘And crocuses, Grandma, vibrant purple crocuses covering the ground.’

She looked over at her grandmother who nodded, eyes closed, smile firmly on her face.

‘Mom and Dad are there and Liam and Caitlin… All of Cam’s brothers and sisters and his folks too… It’s a small church but it’s full with our friends and family. Someone is singing…’

‘What song?’ Linda croaked breathlessly.

‘I’m not sure’ Hope admitted. ‘Any thoughts?’

‘Maybe something by Lionel Ritchie… or the Beatles… or maybe Pachelbel.’

Hope nodded and squeezed her hand. ‘Okay, that sounds good. And I come down the aisle with Mom on one side and Dad on the other.’

‘Tell me… about your dress.’

Considering none of the details had been worked out, it was hard to describe anything with any accuracy but Hope closed her eyes and let herself imagine the dress she might like to wear on her special day.

‘Something vintage, no frills or lace or anything fancy.’

‘No lace?’

‘Well, maybe a little bit of lace but nothing too girly or frilly.’

Linda let out a puff of air - her version of a laugh. 

‘Before the ceremony, Mom will help me with my dress and then Dad will come in looking so handsome and proud, wearing a boutonniere… maybe an orchid like he wore at their wedding. Mom will start to cry as she looks at me in the mirror and Dad will pretend he’s not crying and I’ll tell them how happy I am and how grateful I am to have them in my life. Dad will say something inspirational and call me sweet pea and Mom will ramble on without making sense and start to blubber. And they’ll tell me how proud they are of me and I’ll tell them I couldn't have done any of the things I’ve done without their love and support. Then we’ll all cry and hug and Mom will fuss with my makeup. Then, she’ll look in the mirror and say something like ‘Oh my God Neal, I’m a total mess!’ and Daddy will say ‘No you’re not… you look beautiful Repo’ and he’ll take her hand and lead her out of the room so I can collect myself. And Olivia will be there handing me my bouquet and Caitlin and Becky will be there looking beautiful in the bridesmaids dresses…’ 

Except for the distant sounds coming from the hallway, the room grew quiet. Linda wasn't talking anymore and Hope wasn't sure if she was still listening but she continued, the vision of her wedding day growing ever clearer. 

‘Cam will be waiting for me at the altar wearing a suit… navy blue. He looks good in blue. And his face will light up when he sees me coming down the aisle and I’ll be so excited to reach him that Mom and Dad will have to hold me back so I don’t start running towards him.’

Now, she was fully invested in the fantasy, imagining every detail, the sounds, the colours, the faces, the fragrance of her bouquet wafting in the air. ‘We’ll exchange vows - Father Bertrand says we can write our own - and I’ll tell Cam again how he saved my life just by being there, how every morning I wake up excited at the thought of spending the day with him, how my heart starts to race at the sound of his voice, how he keeps me grounded and sane and how I can’t wait to wake up every day next to him for the rest of our lives.’

Linda had stopped asking questions and Hope thought she detected a soft snore although she couldn’t be sure. She snuggled in a little closer and brought her lips to her grandmother’s ear, whispering softly. ‘I wish you could be there, Grandma.’

She was surprised when Linda replied, just as softly. ‘I will be sweetheart.’

Right outside the room, Neal stood motionless, taking in every word with a cup of tea in one hand and wiping away a tear with the other.

TBC


	54. Chapter 54

‘Ta da!’ Cam announced with a flourish as he stepped out of his tiny apartment kitchen carrying two piping hot bowls of spicy chili.

He wandered over to the living room where Hope sat with her feet up on the couch, the television remote in one hand and a glass of cheap bottled sangria in the other.

She took a sip of wine and placed the goblet on the coffee table before her, whiffing the air like an airedale. ‘That smells yummy!’

She’d begun to come alive again following her earlier visit out to New Rochelle. When she’d first gotten home, she’d been way too quiet but Cam knew her well enough to give her the space she needed to collect herself and he’d slipped away to pull together one of her favourite weekday meals. He hated seeing her so dispirited, torn between her barely contained excitement at their upcoming wedding and the sadness she felt whenever the subject of her grandmother came up. It was time for some serious diversionary tactics to help bring his fiancée out her funk. He offered her one of the bowls, lifting her legs momentarily only to plop them back down onto his lap as he took a spot at the other end of the couch.

‘My mom called today’ he said as he jostled her legs. ‘She suggested Becky come down for a week so she can help you with the plans for the wedding.’

‘Really?’ Hope said, her face brightening. ‘That’d be great. She could finally meet Liv and Caitlin and we could figure out what to do about the bridesmaids’ dresses.’

Cameron looked over at her fondly. That gorgeous smile was back; his mission was complete.

‘So, how are you feeling about tomorrow?’

She shrugged. She’d had so many surgeries since her accident, she had almost lost count. This one would be the last, a fairly minor cosmetic procedure which would be done right in the doctor’s office in midtown Manhattan. She’d be in and out of there in about ninety minutes and in a few weeks, thanks to the miracle of modern medicine, her face would have been fully reconstructed to its original state. Of course, there were the tiny scars that only she could see and the mild numbness in a couple of spots along her cheekbones but overall, this last surgery would be the final step in giving her her life back - the life she’d come so close to losing. 

With everything else going on in her busy life, the procedure and its aftermath had barely registered on her radar.

‘What about tomorrow?’

Cam let his arms fall and stared back in disbelief. ‘I know you consider yourself the bionic woman and an expert at this surgery stuff but…’

‘It’s the least of my worries Cam’ she said, taking a bite of her dinner and humming in appreciation. ‘Besides, you’ll be there, right?’

His eyebrows shot up and he shrugged. ‘Have I missed a single one of your procedures?’ he asked, realizing the topic of cosmetic surgery wasn't typical dinner conversation for a young couple preparing to embark on their new life together. She didn't seem to want to say much more on the subject so he turned his attention back to his bowl of chili which, truth be told, tasted pretty damn good.

‘So, what are we watching?’ he asked, pointing to the tube with his spoon.

From the vacant look in her eyes, he could see Hope’s mind had wandered elsewhere once again. ‘How do you feel about crocuses?’ she asked, out of the blue.

‘Crocuses?’ he repeated, bringing one hand to rest on her ankles and gently massaging the side of her foot. ‘As in do I like crocuses more than say tulips? or as in do i like the sound of the word crocus?’

‘Grandma said today she loves crocuses and it just got me thinking…’

‘You were discussing flower arrangements for our wedding with your grandmother? I thought you said she was barely conscious.’

‘No, not exactly. She was… oh, never mind. What time do you have to leave to meet my dad?’ 

‘Not for another hour.’

He studied her face carefully for any sign of distress at being left alone in the apartment. Ever since the break-in almost a week earlier, she’d been insisting on sleeping with the hallway light on. ‘Look, if you’d rather I didn’t go…’

For months now, her dad had been agonizing about having ‘the talk’ with Cameron — and it had nothing to do with STDs or birth control or treating his little girl with the love and respect she deserved. No, this was something else altogether. The closer they got to the wedding, the more eager Neal was to come clean to his future son-in-law about his illicit past. 

‘No, no, of course not. I know he feels bad about bailing on brunch the other day. Just… go and have a good time. Olivia’s coming over in a little while, anyway. We’re gonna talk about flower arrangements and shoes and interesting stuff like that… so I figure I’m doing you a favour.’

Cam took a large bite and grumbled. ‘Yeah… I really hate to miss that’ he muttered under his breath.

‘So, what’s this about crocuses anyway?’ he asked.

‘I called Father Bertrand and I asked him what kind of bulbs were planted in the garden in front of the church and he said they had some tulips, daffodils and some bluebells.’

Cam stared ahead, trying to figure out where she was going with all this talk about spring flowers. 

‘Any particular reason you called Father Bertrand to ask him about a garden that won’t be blooming for another four to six weeks?’

Hope ignored the snarkiness in his voice. ‘I asked him if we could plant some crocuses alongside the other flowers.’ 

‘With everything we have to do to get ready for the wedding, you’re offering to do some gardening at St. Anthony’s?’ he asked, puzzled. 

‘Grandma likes them and…’

She looked down at her bowl and pretended to examine a kidney bean before popping it in her mouth.

Cameron’s arm reached over to touch her arm and he gave it a loving pat. ‘I think that’s a really nice idea, sweetie.’

‘You don’t think it’s stupid?’

‘Why would I think it’s stupid?’

Hope took a deep breath and placed her bowl on the nearby table, leaning forward to reach for Cam’s hand. ‘She asked me to describe our wedding day this afternoon. She just lay there with a smile on her face and her eyes closed, listening…’

‘Aww baby, I’m sorry. I know how much you would have liked her to be there.’

Hope shrugged and picked up her bowl again. ‘I guess she’ll be there, kind of… I told her there would be tulips and daffodils in the garden in front of the church.’

‘And that’s when she said she liked crocuses’ he guessed.

She nodded and he could see tears forming in her eyes. ‘Well, if Grandma Linda wants crocuses in front of the church’ he said tenderly. ‘We’ll make damn sure she gets them.’

She just nodded in thanks and popped a spoonful of chili in her mouth. ‘This is really good, by the way’ she said, not so expertly changing the subject.

‘Now, are you going to keep hogging that remote control?’ he asked, reaching across her body in effort to grab it from her hand. ‘Because everybody knows, any man worth his salt is in charge of the remote control in his own house.’

She playfully pushed him away and he began to wrestle her while she kept the remote out of arm’s reach.

‘Oh, no you don’t’ she said, trying to kick him away as he finally overpowered her.

He leaned in to kiss her and her whole body relaxed, a soft moan escaping her lips. The distraction worked like a charm and he let his hand roam up her body lustfully, finally landing on the coveted remote and tugging it and out of her hand and safely in his grasp.

He sat up, holding the damn thing at the end of his long arms with a triumphant smile on his face.

‘There are certain things that are non-negotiable’ he teased. ‘You’ll just have to learn that, wifey!’

WCWCWC 

Caitlin’s shift finally came to an end and she rushed to her locker in the daycare staff room to grab her things. It was her turn to check in on her grandmother and if she didn't hurry, she wouldn't have a prayer in hell of getting her to take a few bites of dinner before she went to sleep for the night. 

Who was she kidding? Except for a few, increasingly rare moments of lucidity, Linda Bennett was practically asleep or unconscious most of the time now and getting her to eat anything was nothing more than a pipe dream. 

Caitlin had been wracking her brain for days now, trying to find the right words to say to her beloved grandmother. How could she tell her that, before she came into her life, she was riddled with fears and doubts and that even though she’d made strides since living with Neal and Sara, it was Linda who had pushed her into believing in herself. For the umpteenth time, she imagined herself saying some inane, clichéed thing but it felt like everything she managed to conjure up sounded shallow and rehearsed. Time was running out and she’d yet to find a way to convey her gratitude for what all the woman had done for her. In point of fact, Linda Bennett had given her courage and strength and she’d given her hope for the future, something that up until now had been sorely missing in the young woman’s life.

She made her way to the elevator that would carry her up to the fourth floor - the same elevator she’d taken hundreds of times before. Linda’s room looked out onto the children’s playground and Caitlin couldn't count how many times in the past few weeks she’d stared up at her window from down below while she pulled one of the kids on a sled along one of the playground’s snow covered paths or when she crouched down to wipe a runny nose. She would look up longingly and imagine her grandmother just beyond that window, life slowly ebbing from her body and wishing she was up there, holding her hand.

The fourth floor was busy at this hour as the attendants tidied up in the communal dining area and the nurses began their after dinner rounds. Caitlin heard the soft murmur of television sets as she walked by the rooms - the quiet jingling sound of the bell as Vanna uncovered a new letter on the board, the familiar theme music from Entertainment Tonight. As she got closer to Linda’s room, things grew quiet except for the soft sound jazz coming from her room — the music barely audible if you weren't listening for it.

She heard the soft murmur of a voice, instantly recognizing Sara although she couldn't decipher what she was saying. She stopped and stood in the doorway, watching as her foster mom leaned in and whispered something in Linda’s ear. She watched as Sara ran her hand lovingly over Linda’s forehead, caressing her fine hair as she began to hum along with the song. Before long, Sara was singing softly as Caitlin recognized one of Linda’s favourites, Billie Holliday, singing in the background.

‘Don’t know why…’ Sara sang softly if not miserably off-key.

To say that Sara Ellis couldn't carry a tune in a breadbasket was a huge understatement but despite her shortcomings - and convinced she didn't have an audience - Sara continued murmuring the lyrics, Linda Bennett apparently not in any position to critique her daughter-in-law’s less than stellar performance. 

Linda might be a captive audience but the least Caitlin could do was rescue her beloved grandmother from Sara’s discordant mangling of one of Linda’s favourite tunes. 

Wiping an unwitting grin off her face, she called out from the doorway. 

‘Hey Sara!’ 

The impromptu singing ended as Sara looked up at her. ‘Hi sweetie, how are you doing?’ 

Sara rose and without hesitation, opened up her arms to her foster daughter.

‘Good’ Caitlin said, letting herself melt in Sara’s arms. ‘How is she?’

Sara gave her a sad smile; there was no use in pretending. 

‘Peaceful’ she replied, taking Caitlin’s hand as they both returned to the woman’s bedside.

Linda didn't move or open her eyes although, as Sara had said, she did look peaceful.

‘Did she eat anything?’ Caitlin asked, the first question she always asked whenever she came into the room.

Although she knew all too well it was a little too late for all that, she couldn't help but ask. Sadly, at this point, all they could do as a family was to respect Linda’s last wishes and be by her side when the moment finally came for her to draw her last breath.

‘Afraid not honey’ Sara murmured, running her hand through her hair. 

Caitlin nodded and took the chair by the bed. She leaned in and kissed her grandmother on the cheek. ‘Hey Grandma, I’m here.’

Sara watched and held her breath while Linda lay there, motionless.

‘You know Hope is over at Cam’s and Neal is out tonight…’ Sara said. ‘Would you like me to stay and keep you company for a while?’

Caitlin looked up and shook her head. ‘No, you go on home and have dinner. I was kind of hoping to have a bit of time alone with her anyway. I have some things I want to… talk to Grandma about.’

Sara nodded. There were things she couldn't shield her foster daughter from and besides, hovering wouldn't do any good. Instead, she took a few steps towards Linda and leaned down, kissing her forehead. 

‘Sleep well, Linda. I’ll be back tomorrow’ she said, her voice shaky.

‘I love you’ she added before slipping out the door and leaving the woman in her granddaughter’s loving care.

WCWCWC

‘I guess I should get going. I promised my mom I’d drop by their place on my way home.’

‘You’re leaving?’ Hope asked, alarm apparent in her voice.

Olivia Mason had heard all about the creepy guy who had burgled the Caffrey place and had invaded Hope’s privacy by manhandling every undergarment he'd found there. First thing Monday morning, Hope had gone out and replaced every single item in her extensive collection, unable to face slipping on undies the asshole had touched or maybe worse. Apparently, she wasn't quite over it.

‘I could… hang out a little while longer I guess. Until Cam gets home’ she readily agreed.

‘That’d be great. I… I g-guess I’m a little tense about the surgery tomorrow’ Hope fibbed although she wasn't sure why she felt the need to lie to her best friend. 

‘Hope it’s okay. I’d be a mess too if someone had come into my bedroom and gone through my underwear drawer.’

‘It was more than that’ Hope admitted. ‘It was that stupid message on my bedroom mirror. I keep thinking he’s going to show up at the gallery… or when he knows Cam’s going to be out.’

Olivia reached out and patted her best friend’s hand. ‘How’s your grandmother doing?’

‘Not good. The doctor told my dad that any day now, they’re going to start increasing her morphine and she’ll just… slowly slip into unconsciousness.’

‘I’m sorry. I know how hard it is to watch someone die. My dad was a mess when my grandma died last year. It’s not just your own pain… it’s watching someone you love grieving too.’

‘Well, you know my dad’ Hope said. ‘He does a pretty good job of taking care of everybody else.’

Her eyes met Olivia’s. ‘But I know this is really hard on him. They… they’d been apart for decades, believe it or not. He only just reunited with her a few years ago.’

She stopped and shook her head. ‘Why do people do that to each other Liv? They wait until it’s too late and… well, you can never go back and change things.’

‘But he didn’t… wait, I mean. He made up with her and if he hadn’t, he wouldn't have had these last few years with her.’

Hope nodded; that was true enough, although it seemed there was never enough time once you realized it would eventually come to an end. 

‘I don’t know what to do about Liam. Grandma said to tell him she knows he loves her, and to make sure he doesn't feel bad about not being here. I know he’d come if I called him but he’s got an exam tomorrow…’

‘Liam’s old enough to make up his own mind, don’t you think? Why don’t you give him a call and tell him what’s going on?’

‘But it’s almost ten o’clock.’

Olivia gave her an eye roll. ‘Seriously?’ she said, mocking her. 

‘Look, I’m going to go the bathroom. You can decide what you want to do about Liam’ she said, standing and bringing Hope’s phone closer to her before she walked away.

The room grew all too quiet and Hope was no longer able to shut down her brain. If she didn't reach out to her brother, he might be upset with her for taking the decision out of his hands. Her eyes went to her phone, staring at it silently as if it might bite her hand off.

She sighed, picked it up and pressed speed dial.

WCWCWC

Cam stepped into the familiar diner and spotted his future father-in-law deep in conversation with Hope’s uncle Mozzie at a nearby booth. Mr. Caffrey had invited him over to White Plains for coffee so they could make up for their missed brunch the previous weekend and his insistence had been a sure sign that whatever was on his mind was too personal and/or too important to do on the fly at the gallery where they rubbed elbows almost daily.

In Cam’s estimation, there were two plausible explanations as to why his future father-in-law had invited him for a face-to-face mere weeks before he and Hope tied the knot. 

Perhaps, it was the traditional ‘welcome to the family son but if you ever break my little girl’s heart, I’ll hunt you down to the ends of the earth and make you rue the day you were born’ speech. But that message had already been received loud and clear years ago and besides, Cameron had more than proven his mettle when he’d stood by Hope throughout the darkest period of her life. Not every couple had their loyalty tested so early on in their relationship but he and Hope had… and Cam had passed with flying colours. If he could be faithful and devoted to her at a time where her future loomed dark and gloomy, then it was abundantly clear that he would live up to his commitment and do anything for the woman he so obviously adored.

More likely, the reason for Neal’s invitation was a misguided - and frankly unnecessary - effort to come clean about his past as a master forger and reformed criminal who’d worked as an informant for the FBI. 

Hope had always been discreet about her dad’s criminal past but unbeknownst to Neal - and Hope for that matter - Cam had known all about the man’s criminal past almost since the day he’d first stepped into Professor Neal Caffrey’s Art History class at NYU. 

The sudden arrival on campus of the brilliant and extremely good-looking part-time lecturer had had tongues wagging back then. Not only did the enigmatic stranger have an unparalleled and extensive mastery of the course material but in record time, he’d managed to make quite an impression with the young women in the class — some of whom had found it impossible not to become distracted by the new teacher’s extreme good looks and sexy swagger.

Mr. Caffrey was intriguing and mysterious, of that there was no doubt, and some of the girls in the class had snooped around to try to uncover all they could find about the charismatic man. Rumours abounded about his personal life, ranging from his marital status, his height and weight, his previous occupations and extending to any intimate details the students could get their hands on right down to speculation about his shoe size and whether he favoured boxers or briefs. This latest debate had sparked so much controversy that it had lead to the creation of a betting pool amongst some of the more love starved female students - with briefs given two to one odds over boxers. 

Cam recalled how one student in particular, a blonde woman named Melanie, had developed a mammoth crush on Mr. Caffrey and had seen fit to dig up everything she could about the gorgeous part-time lecturer. She had been only too happy to repeat every spicy morsel she’d dug up, including what she’d uncovered about Mr. Caffrey’s past, his very naughty past as a debonair conman and master bond forger. The information had made the rounds, only adding to the mystique and making the man seem all the more enigmatic and darkly dangerous. 

Back then, Cam had taken the gossip with a grain of salt but as his relationship with Hope deepened, he’d given in to his morbid curiosity and carried out some research of his own. It hadn't taken long to find out about Neal’s past as a confidential criminal informant for the FBI or the four year detour he'd taken at Sing Sing Penitentiary which had landed him the gig with the Feds in the first place. The information he’d uncovered had certainly helped explain some of the unusual things Cam had observed around the Caffrey home, including his boss’ relationship with that funny little man Hope referred to as her ‘uncle Moz’ or the nature of Neal’s relationship with Mr. Burke, the man who Cam discovered, had been his handler at the FBI. 

This was the stuff suspense novels were made of and his parents might have had a thing or two to say about the family their son was marrying into — not that any of it made any difference to Cam. Mr. Caffrey had been nothing but a positive influence in his life. He’d been a wonderful university professor, teaching him all he knew about the history of art throughout the ages. Over time, he’d taken Cam under his wing, becoming an inspiring mentor and showing him the ropes of running a successful gallery and more recently, he’d been a fantastic boss who trusted him more and more with his beloved Raphael. But more importantly, Mr. Caffrey was a wonderful dad to the woman Cameron had fallen in love with and by all accounts, an amazing husband and a contributing member of their community. He’d never had any doubts that he’d also be a supportive father-in-law.

On a couple of occasions, Cam had almost asked Hope about the sordid tale but he'd held his tongue; if she’d never mentioned it, surely she’d had her reasons and besides, it wasn't her secret to tell and it had nothing to do with the two of them or their future together. It wasn't as if her dad was a prison escapee on the FBI’s most wanted list. He was reformed, a productive member of society, an art connoisseur, a respected gallery owner and an all-around great guy. What else did he need to know about him? 

He stood by the front door of the diner for a moment, examining the interaction between his future father-in-law and Mozzie. Their discussion was animated with Mr. Caffrey gesticulating as he spoke. Whatever was happening between the two men looked pretty damn intense and he began to make his way over to join them. 

Sonia, the waitress he knew from his frequent visits to the dining establishment, appeared, balancing a full tray of drinks.

‘Hey Cameron! You on your own tonight?’ she called out as he waved to her. 

‘How are those wedding plans coming along?’

‘Good, good’ he replied absentmindedly. 

His eyes remained trained on Neal who had yet to notice him standing there.

‘You here to meet Mr. Caffrey?’ she asked as he gave her a dismissive nod.

He took a few long strides arriving at the table just in time to hear Neal say: ‘… and I want to be there when you meet with him.’ 

Neal stopped talking, noticing Cameron standing there, eyes growing wide.

‘You found him, didn't you?’ Cameron said as Neal looked around the restaurant to make sure no one was listening.

‘Cam! Hi’ he said, sliding over to make room for the newcomer in the booth.

Cameron took a seat, his knees hitting the underside of the table as he attempted to fold his long, lanky legs into the cramped space. 

‘Is this about that Jesse guy?’ he asked before either man had even acknowledged his first question.

Mozzie eyed him suspiciously. For years, he’d been under direct orders from Neal to never discuss any of his harebrained schemes in front of Cameron - or Caitlin for that matter. He wasn’t sure how much he was allowed to say in front of Hope’s fiancé and he glanced over at Neal, looking for some sort of sign.

‘It’s okay Moz’ Neal said, turning to look at his future son-in-law. ‘Cam, Mozzie has some… contacts. Jesse’s been spotted out in the Meatpacking District.’

‘Well, let’s go get him’ Cameron said, making a move to stand.

Neal held him back. ‘Whoa, whoa there cowboy. Take it easy.’

Cam’s face became flushed, his heart pumping wildly at the thought of confronting the asshole who'd been making his beloved Hope’s life a living hell. 

‘Well, what are we waiting for?’ he asked.

‘We’ll get him, Cam, we will. Mozzie and I are working on a plan to bring him down.’

‘Not without me, you're not!’ Cam said with a combative tone Neal had seldom heard. ‘I want in. I want two minutes alone with the asshole before they haul his sorry ass off to jail.’

The two other men exchanged worried looks; they would only get one chance to spin a web in which to trap Jesse Davis and they needed to do it right if they didn't want him slipping out of their grasp. Besides Hope’s safety, there was Caitlin to consider — to say nothing of the small matter of the forty-five thousand dollar cameo they were hoping to recover.

‘Look’ Neal finally said. ‘We’ll tell you everything but you can’t go off half-cocked, all right?’

Cameron let out a shaky breath and nodded just as Sonia appeared, coffee pot in hand and pad and pencil in the other.

Cam didn't seem to notice her and Neal put out his and Mozzie’s cups for a refill. ‘Cam’ll have a cup of coffee too.’

‘Coming right up’ she said, giving Neal a dazzling smile.

‘So’ Cameron said, his breath still shaky. ‘Tell me what’s going on. And don’t leave anything out.’

WCWCWC

Caitlin lay beside her grandmother, much as Hope had done earlier in the day, half her body hanging off the side of the bed so as not to crowd her too much.

‘… and then, at lunch, Jessica said her mommy had a baby in her tummy’ she whispered softly. ‘And Emma, you know the little red-haired girl… she said: ‘your mommy swallowed a baby?’’

She giggled softly and watched Linda’s face, disappointed when she saw no reaction to her little story. Normally, when she came up after her shift at the day care, Linda would quiz her about her day. She loved hearing stories about the kids in Caitlin’s preschool group, especially the funny things they said and did.   
Sadly, it was becoming apparent that those precious moments were gone forever. Caitlin reached for Linda’s elbow and began caressing the bony joint - a weird little habit she’d gotten into whenever they lay together talking.

‘Grandma…’ she murmured, crying softly. ‘Please don’t die. I don’t know if I can go on without you in my life.’  
She heard the repetitive sound of the oxygen — in and out, in and out — noticing how slow Linda’s breathing had become… slow but steady. 

‘I know I’ve got Sara and Mr. C and they’re great but… you’re the only one who really understands me. Who’s going to want to listen to my funny stories about the kids if you’re not there?’

Caitlin brought her forehead to rest in the crook of Linda’s neck, feeling the heat from her body radiating off her as she made a loud rasping noise. Linda’s eyes fluttered open, red and unfocussed and Caitlin gasped.

‘Hey’ she said, pulling away to get a better look in her eyes.

‘Hello… beautiful… girl’ Linda whispered with difficulty.

‘Grandma, I love you so much’ Caitlin said, sobbing.

Linda nodded and smiled, unable to speak and Caitlin returned her face to rest against her shoulder.

‘You’ve given me so much. I always thought I was a misfit and that I didn't fit in anywhere. Everybody I knew was smarter than me, braver, prettier… had better skin’ she said with a giggle and a sob. ‘But then I met you and I found out I wasn't the only one.’

Linda made a gurgling sound which, once she’d pulled away, Caitlin could see was a weak attempt at a chuckle. Linda’s eyes remained closed but there was a small smile on her lips and suddenly, she was talking, her voice barely audible. 

‘Believe… in yourself’ she said with a loud sigh. 

‘I will Grandma. I’m scared. But I will, I promise.’

Linda Bennett’s eyes opened, her eyes glassy. ‘You… can… do anything. I’ll help you.’

TBC


	55. Chapter 55

‘Cam, this guy has a gun’ Neal said, trying to keep his voice down.

‘I can handle myself’ Cam replied with confidence - or was that false bravado?

The three men had been sitting in the diner for almost an hour and despite having had dinner just a few hours before, they’d all managed to chow down on a late night snack of club sandwiches, greasy fries and slices of apple pie. Neal could feel his stomach doing flip-flops but as usual, Mozzie was still at it, picking away at the congealed fries. 

Neal shook his head in disbelief. ‘How are you still stuffing your face?’ he asked.

‘I’m stress eating’ the older man declared, his mouth full.

‘Look’ Neal continued. ‘Let’s just keep it simple. You arrange a time and place to meet with him for the exchange and I’ll get Peter to tip off the police…’

Cam interrupted, leaning in. ‘I told you, I want to….have a private chat with him before he gets picked up.’ 

Neal did a double take; it was as if he was watching mild-mannered Clark Kent morph into Superman right before his very eyes. Who was this guy? Cameron Armstrong was one of the sweetest, most gentle souls he’d ever met. The man didn't have a mean bone in his body and yet here he was talking about wanting to bash in Jesse Davis’ face as if he did that kind of thing every day. All in some misguided attempt at defending the honour of his fair lady.

‘Look, I get it Cam. Believe me, I’m pissed off at him too. He totally freaked Caitlin out and he walked off with a fifty-thousand dollar pin Sara was… holding for one of her clients.’

Cam stared back defiantly. ‘I need to do this Mr. Caffrey’ he said, his voice calm. ‘I only need two minutes alone with the guy to make my point.’

‘Oh, so you can go off and get yourself arrested for assault just a few weeks before your wedding? No way! Hope and Sara will never forgive me.’

‘I’m not going to get arrested, right Mozzie?’ Cam said, turning to look at the other man.

Mozzie glanced in Neal’s direction as Neal glared back at him - this was the textbook definition of being stuck between a rock and a hard place.

‘Moz, why don’t you go and set up a time with him before he gets spooked and decides to leave town’ Neal suggested, eager to be left alone with Cameron so they could have that long awaited chat. 

‘But not until tomorrow night’ Cam warned, wagging his finger in Mozzie’s face. ‘Hope’s got that procedure in the morning and I want to make sure she’s settled.’

Mozzie reached for his phone, preparing to make the call. Neal raised his hand to stop him.

‘Not here Moz’ he said, giving a not-so-discreet head nod in the direction of his future son-in-law.

It took a minute for Mozzie to catch on. ‘Oh… right’ he said with a not so discreet wink and a knowing nod. 

He noticed Sonia walking by and called out to her. ‘Can I get a couple more slices of this to go? Oh, and maybe a couple of pieces of cherry pie too.’

‘You got it Mozzie’ she said before disappearing to fill his order.

Neal and Cam watched as Mozzie collected his things and grabbed for his coat.  
‘Keep it simple Moz, just a simple transaction’ Neal reminded him. ‘No crazy stuff, okay?’

‘Tell him you’re bringing the client along with you’ Cam interjected as Neal shook his head vehemently.

‘NO! Don’t tell him that. Just… settle on a time and place and we’ll take it from there.’

Cameron sighed, none too pleased. That was okay, he’d find a way to convince Neal to let him get involved once he got him alone. 

Sonia returned with an oversized brown paper bag and handed it to Mozzie along with a bill which he threw on the table.

‘Oh, Neal will take care of that’ he declared before standing and disappearing out the door.

The place grew quiet - as always happened whenever Mozzie left a room, any room. Neal sat, fidgeting in his seat as he stared down at the congealed grease on his plate. He could feel his heart thumping wildly in his chest. It was showtime, time to finally come clean to Cam after months of agonizing about telling him the truth. 

Would their relationship go down the tubes once Neal confessed or would they find a way to co-exist in continued mutual respect and harmony? Either way, the young man deserved the truth. He’d been a trustworthy employee, an all-round good guy and in a matter of weeks he would become a part of the extended Caffrey clan. It was time to tell him everything and let the chips fall where they may.

Cameron slipped out of the booth and repositioned himself across from Neal in the spot Mozzie had just vacated.

‘Look, kid, there’s something I need to talk to you about… the reason I asked you to meet me for coffee.’

Cam stared back, his mind still focussed on getting Neal to agree to let him have a go at Jesse. Suddenly, it had become extremely important to take a stand so Hope could feel safe again.

Neal’s mind was in a totally other headspace. He needed to unburden himself before he burst or had an aneurysm - whichever came first.

‘Look Cam, I’m sure you have a lot of questions… about my relationship with Mozzie, for starters. And you might have heard stuff around the house or discussions I’ve had with Peter that you’re wondering about…’

Cam frowned. The only discussion he wanted to have was about where and when he could finally stand up to Jesse Davis and make him pay for scaring the woman he loved.

‘Look Mr. Caffrey… if this is about the fact that you were a world class forger and that you served four years at Sing Sing before going to work for the FBI as a confidential informant, I know all about it’ he said, without even drawing a breath.

The room started spinning as Neal stared back, letting out a loud gasp. Maybe he was having an aneurysm. After all, wasn't your hearing the first thing to go? 

WCWCWC

‘Who was that?’ Josh Monteith asked, dropping his book and turning to face his roomie.

‘My sister… it looks like my grandmother isn't going to hang on much longer.’

‘So, what are you going to do? We have an exam first thing tomorrow and we have a game on Saturday night.’

‘I’m going to write my exam in the morning and then I’m going to hop a bus and go home’ Liam said, the only answer that made any sense at all.

‘The coach isn't going to be happy’ Josh said, eyebrows raised. ‘He’s counting on you against the Panthers.’

Liam stood and walked over to get himself a drink in the mini-fridge. He returned to his bed, taking a seat on the edge and popping open the can of Orange Crush. He took a sip and shrugged. ‘I’ll just have to explain things to him. Family comes first.’

‘Not sure he’s going to see things that way’ Josh said, resituating himself on his bed so he could face Liam.

‘Tough…’ Liam said defiantly, although he was already having doubts about his decision.

Basketball was a big deal on campus and it was a large part of why he got to attend Syracuse University. He recalled one of the first things the coaches had told the recruits when they’d sat them down for their first team meeting: something about how the Orange owned their sorry little asses for the next four years. Whereas attending his grandmother’s funeral might be deemed a good enough reason to skip out on a game, would the coach feel the same way if Liam missed a game just so he could visit her one last time?

‘I’ll talk to him first thing in the morning, see what he says’ Liam said with a loud sigh.

‘So, what’s the scoop with Todd? You never told me what happened when you went over to his place the other day.’

Liam grew uncomfortable and began fidgeting on the bed. ‘It’s not going to work… this whole friendship thing. Todd will always want more from me.’

Josh’s eyebrows rose in surprise; maybe Liam was finally learning his lesson. ‘You know you can’t be everything to everybody, Caffrey.’

‘I’m starting to realize that’ Liam said, his voice quiet. ‘I think the best thing I can do is to get the hell out of the way and let other people help Todd. Otherwise, this whole thing is going to swallow me up whole.’

‘Ugh, I just got a nasty visual…’ Josh teased.

Liam reached for a pair of dirty socks, bundled them up together and threw them at Josh, hitting him smack dab in the head.

‘Hey, this is a dirty sock free zone!’ Josh cried out in mock annoyance, reaching for a pair of his own and retaliating.

Before long, the room was littered with clothes as the two of them threw various items across the room. They giggled like a couple of kids - which, of course, was exactly what they still were. 

WCWCWC

Sara pulled her eyes away from her book and waited to see whose footsteps were coming up the stairs. They were a little too light to be Neal’s, a little too rapid to be Hope’s - which left only one possible suspect.

‘Caitlin? Is that you?’ she called out just as the young woman appeared in the doorway to her bedroom.

‘Hey Sara’ she said, leaning against the door frame as if she needed help to stay upright.

‘Are you just getting back from seeing Linda?’

Caitlin took a few steps and let herself fall face first onto the bed in overdramatic fashion.

‘I wanted to stay longer but they kicked me out’ she said, her face smothered in the duvet.

Sara smiled. ‘Come here’ she said, pulling back the blankets and inviting her into bed with her.

Caitlin kicked off her shoes and crawled up, glad for the invitation.

‘Did she sleep the whole time you were there?’ Sara asked.

‘Mostly. She seemed to hear what I was saying but… it’s hard to tell.’

‘Honey, you’re going to get sick if you don’t slow down’ Sara warned.

‘I don’t want to waste a single minute with her.’ 

Sara ran her hand through Caitlin’s hair and pulled her into a hug. She could feel the tension in the young woman’s body and sure enough, it took but a second for her to start shaking in her arms, sobbing softly in the quiet room.

‘Caitlin… sweetheart, Grandma will always be with you even after she’s gone.’

‘I don’t want her to go.’

Sara sighed; if only life was made up of wishes and dreams - or rainbows and unicorns, either one would do. 

‘You know both my folks died when I was about your age’ she confided.

Caitlin snorted and wiped her nose against her sweater sleeve. She’d heard about Sara’s parents dying in a car accident but she didn't know much in the way of details. She pulled away and looked at Sara.

‘That’s horrible. How did you ever cope?’

Sara got a faraway look in her eyes. ‘To be honest… it’s all a giant blur. It’s funny, I remember the oddest little details like… I was wearing this blue turtleneck sweater I really liked and I was sitting in my first year psych class. I hated that class… I always thought psychology was such bullshit. I was sitting there, picking at my nail polish when someone from the admissions office came to the door. It’s all so clear - like it happened earlier today. I remember exactly what the woman looked like: she was wearing this god-ugly tartan skirt and those horrible cat glasses’ she said, motioning with her hands.

‘She said my name and the professor, this short little man who wore bowties and had the worst toupee I’ve ever seen… he gave me this solemn head nod, almost like he knew they were coming to tell me some horrible news.’

Caitlin sniffled. ‘I remember exactly what he was talking about… he was explaining the whole nature versus nurture debate and I remember thinking what a crock of shit it all was when this woman repeated my name a second time, asking me to follow her to the admissions office. Then… I don’t remember anything. I don’t know how they told me or what I did, who I talked to, how I got out of there and back to my dorm. I sort of remember the funeral but not really. There were tons of people, neighbours, friends of my parents, my aunt… but it’s all a giant blur.’

She seemed totally lost in her memories - even though they were over thirty years old.

‘Do you still think about them a lot?’

Sara let out a strangled laugh. ‘Pretty well every day, there’ll be a brief flashback about something my mom used to say.’

‘Like what?’

‘Oh, you know, regular mom stuff. ‘Make sure you’re always wearing clean underwear in case you get into an accident’ - that one haunted me for a long time considering how she died. Or she’d say ‘Sara, be kind to people and they’ll always be kind to you’. You know, regular platitudes parents say to their kids - stuff I sometimes find myself saying to you guys.

‘What about your dad? What was he like?’

‘My dad was… an overachiever, a workaholic. We didn't call it that back then. People would say he was such a hard worker, how he took care of his family but really… it was all about getting recognition at work. He wasn't there for us. I blamed him for Emily leaving. She was gentle and sweet like my mom and he would have destroyed her if she’d stayed but me… I bought the whole shtick. For a long time, I bought the bullshit about work being the most important thing a person can live for.’

Sara continued with Caitlin hanging on her every word. ‘He’d say ‘Pull up your bootstraps, Sara. No one gets things handed to them for free in life’ she said, deepening her voice in imitation.

‘But he was wrong… he was wrong but he meant well. And that’s what I hold on to.’

She seemed to snap out of it, turning to look at Caitlin’s teary eyes. ‘The people we’ve loved and lost… they never really go away. They live on in the things we say and do, it’s up to us to keep the best of those memories alive. You’ll see, it’ll be hard at first. You’ll be sad when you think of Grandma and then, after a while it won’t hurt quite so much and you’ll start remembering funny little things about her and you’ll smile instead of crying.’

Caitlin sniffled and resettled in Sara’s welcoming arms. ‘The bottom line is we all suffer loss in our lives but the people we loved… well, they live on… in our minds, in our hearts.’

‘What do you want to remember most about Grandma?’ she added, caressing Caitlin’s blond head of hair and placing a gentle kiss on her forehead.

‘That she believed in me’ Caitlin said without hesitation. ‘And that she’d want me to believe in myself.’

Sara nodded; that was quite the legacy to leave this young woman who was riddled with self-doubt and insecurities.

‘She’s right… whenever you get sad, you need to try to focus on that. I know you want Grandma to be proud of you.’

The room grew quiet, the two women finding comfort in each other’s arms. Sara had begun to think Caitlin had nodded off when she spoke, her voice quiet.

‘Did my mom call?’ 

‘Your mom? Why? Was she supposed to?’

‘I keep hoping she’ll call and tell me where Jesse is hiding out’ Caitlin explained as Sara put her arm around her and pulled her in tight against her.

‘Oh, honey… let the police handle it’ she said. ‘They’ll find him and he’ll pay for what he did.’

‘But he took that expensive brooch of yours. Aren’t you pissed off?’

‘Of course I’m pissed off, I’m majorly pissed off. It was a gift… I was planning on returning it but… still.’

‘Why were you going to return it? Didn't you like it?’

‘No… of course I did. It’s beautiful but… well, it wasn't an appropriate gift for me to take from one of my clients.’

‘That man…’

‘Randy Piper?’ Sara said.

‘Yeah, was he really an old boyfriend of yours?’

‘Yup, we dated when I was in university.’

‘Mr. C doesn't look too thrilled about you spending time with him.’

Sara remained quiet; she and Neal didn't air their quarrels in front of the kids. It was a commitment they’d made to each other years ago, one they’d always stuck to.

‘You could have been filthy rich if you’d married him!’ Caitlin said. 

‘Maybe… but that doesn't mean I would have been happy.’

‘You’re kidding, right? Anybody who's that rich has got to be happy.’

Sara pulled away, intent on looking into Caitlin’s blue eyes. ‘That’s not true. I wouldn't trade my life with Neal and you guys for anything.’

‘If he had kept…’ Caitlin hesitated, unsure what word to use. ‘If Mr. C had kept forging paintings and stuff, you could have been living a life like that.’

Sara’s eyebrows shot up. ‘Or I could have been visiting him every week in a maximum security prison’ she said. ‘What Neal and I have… it’s worth a million times all the fancy stuff Randy Piper has.’

Caitlin studied her foster mom’s face. ‘You really mean it, don’t you?’

‘Of course I mean it. Neal is… he’s sweet and kind and generous and he’d do anything to protect the people he loves.’ She pushed a stray strand of hair from Caitlin’s face. ‘Neal is the only man I’ve ever truly loved and I thank god every day he feels the same way about me.’

‘And he’s hot’ Caitlin added with a grin. ‘Just don’t tell him I said that.’

Sara chuckled. ‘That’s okay, I think he figured it out already… generally speaking, he’s got a pretty healthy ego.’

‘Sara…’

‘Huh?’

‘Someday, I hope I’ll get to meet someone like Mr. C. and have the kind of marriage the two of you have.’

‘I hope you do too, Caitlin.’

There was a collective sigh, Caitlin’s body relaxing in Sara’s arms. Sara had promised Linda she’d be there for the young woman and she was bound and determined to keep her promise.

‘Get some sleep sweetheart’ she whispered into her hair.

WCWCWC

Neal’s jaw dropped and he sat there staring into space for a minute or so before his brain rebooted. Had he just heard right? Had Cameron just said he’d known all along what Neal had been agonizing for weeks about telling him? If so, how? Had Hope broken the sacred trust between father and daughter? Of course, he’d never asked her not to share his secret with Cameron but he’d never once considered that she might. It was kind of an unspoken thing between them: his shame and embarrassment at having people find out his dirty little secret, her commitment to protecting her dad, the man she loved and respected like no other. 

‘How did you… You mean you’ve know about… my past all along?’

‘No, not exactly. But when you first came to NYU eight years ago, there was a lot of… chatter about you.’

‘Chatter?’

‘Yeah, surely it didn't escape your attention that some of the girls in that art history class had stars in their eyes whenever you walked into the room.’

Neal got a smug smile on his face as he recalled how he’d practically had to fight some of those young girls off with a stick. He wiped the smile off his face and pasted on a more appropriate frown.

‘I suppose I did notice that’ he mumbled. ‘Not that I ever gave them any encouragement.’

Cameron rolled his eyes. ‘Yeah, well some of them were hell bent on finding out everything they could possibly find out about you. And I do mean everything.’

That self-satisfied smile was inching its way back onto Neal’s lips. What was that causing his chest to swell like a proud peacock? Warped pride, an inflated sense of self-importance?

‘Oh yeah? Like… what things?’

‘Like, you know, whether you were married or not, where you lived, if you had kids, what your wife looked like…’

Neal nodded as he listened, his face serious.

Cam knew his boss pretty well - including his vain streak. He leaned in to whisper. ‘They even ran a pool so people could bet on whether you wore boxers or briefs.’

‘Ewww!’ Neal whimpered. ‘That’s… Wait a minute, how did they know who to pay off in the pool?’

‘Remember Richard Gendron, that exchange student from Montreal?’

Neal’s eyes narrowed as he tried to place the young man, his face brightening up as the recollection came flooding back. ‘That redhead kid who was always getting Monet and Manet mixed up?’ 

Cam nodded. ‘Well, some of the girls offered him ten percent of the pot to follow you into the washroom and come back with the answer.’

‘Ewwww!’ Neal repeated, thoroughly disgusted at the thought of being spied on in the sanctity of the men’s room.

‘Anyway, there was a lot of… gossip about your past. To be honest, I didn't pay that much attention to what they were saying back then but when things started getting serious between me and Hope…’

He looked down at his cup of coffee, embarrassed at his own confession. ‘…I did some digging of my own. It wasn't hard to figure out you know, the stuff about your time working as a confidential informant for the FBI… it’s all over the internet.’

Neal looked ill at ease too. ‘And Hope never said anything to you about it?’

‘No, of course not. And I never asked her about it either. I figured if either one of you wanted me to know, you would have said something.’

Neal was having trouble looking the younger man in the eye. All those times he thought he was pulling the wool over his eyes or was worried he might have overheard a conversation he was having with Mozzie… turns out Cam had known all along.

‘Mr. Caffrey, none of that matters to me. I understand you not wanting everyone to know and I appreciate you wanting to tell me about it and if it’s that important to you, I’ll be glad to listen but…unless you really need to, I’m good.’

‘You don't have any questions?’ Neal asked.

‘Not really. Maybe later but right now I want to talk about this jerk and what he did to Hope, what he did to all of you. I know Mozzie’s got contacts in the underworld and I suppose you do too. I’m the perfect guy for this job… Jesse might know what you look like but he’s never met me. Just… let me go with Mozzie… please. I can pretend to be the buyer.’

Cameron stood at six-foot-four, a good six inches taller than Jesse Davis but he’d never had what one might call a muscular build. Cam had more of a tall, lanky physique although he worked out plenty at the local gym. He could certainly hold his own in a physical altercation with a man like Jesse except for one important detail: the last time Neal checked, the man was carrying a gun and Neal wouldn't put it past him to use it if he felt cornered.

‘Cam, this guy… he’s volatile. If he feels trapped, there’s no telling what he’ll do.’

‘But we’ll have the element of surprise on our side. He thinks he’s meeting someone to make a sale. His guard will be down, he’s not going to go in with his gun drawn.’

He could tell Neal was starting to thaw; he just needed to keep chipping away at him. ‘Look, you could be there. We totally control where this is happening and between the three of us, I’m sure we could easily overpower him until the police arrive.’

They seemed to be going around and around in circles and Neal was getting the distinct impression Cam wasn't going to budge. His head was starting to spin and he could feel his blood pressure skyrocketing as he imagined the possibility of Cam getting hurt and what that would do to Hope. But then again, maybe Cam had a point - if they chose the right time and place for the swap, Jesse wouldn't be expecting an ambush. Maybe they could recover the brooch, get the guy arrested and give Cameron the retribution he so badly wanted.

‘Let me sleep on it, all right? You take care of our girl tomorrow and I promise I won’t make any final decisions before I talk to you’ Neal said, putting out his hand to shake Cam’s.

They shook on it, Cam apparently satisfied with the interim solution to their little dilemma. 

‘And just for the record’ Cam said as he got to his feet. ‘I never told another living soul and I never would.’ 

Neal smiled and patted him on the arm. The two men slipped on their coats, suddenly feeling very weary. Neal pulled out his wallet and threw some bills on the table. A thought seemed to cross his mind and he frowned as he spoke. 

‘And by the way’ he said with a playful smirk. ‘It’s boxer briefs. Boxers bunch up and briefs leave a panty line.’

Cameron stared back in disbelief at Neal’s candour, this was definitely a case of TMI. ‘Look, Mr. Caffrey, like I said, I really don’t give a crap about your criminal past… but believe it or not, I care even less about your choice of underwear.’ 

Neal chuckled, bringing his hand to rest on Cameron’s back. With fewer secrets between them, it appeared the bond between them was strong and that their friendship would remain intact for the foreseeable future. 

WCWCWC

This time, there was no doubt as to whose footsteps were coming up the stairs and Sara sat up in bed, waiting for Neal to step into the room. It was past midnight and she and Caitlin had both fallen asleep with the bedside lamp still on. 

Neal’s eyes widened at the sight of their foster daughter and he shrugged, silently asking his wife what she was doing in their bed. Sara shrugged back in response. 

‘Caitlin?’ Neal whispered, jostling her. 

‘Huh?’ she muttered as she came to.

‘Off to bed, kiddo’ he said as she grumbled.

She climbed out of bed, staggering slightly and picking up her shoes.

‘Goodnight Mr. C’ she said, placing a kiss on his cheek.

‘Thanks Sara’ she mumbled as she headed to her own room.

Neal reached for the tie which hung limply around his neck. He tugged it off and threw it on the chair by the bed. He proceeded to take off his shirt, pants and socks and stood there poking around his dresser in nothing but his boxer briefs.

‘What was that all about?’ he asked over his shoulder.

‘She was upset when she got back from Blue Skies so we cuddled for a while. Guess we both nodded off.’ 

Neal’s face grew dark. ‘Are there any new developments? With my mom?’

‘No, but the staff asked if you could pop by first thing tomorrow morning. They want to discuss upping her meds.’

Neal continued poking around his dresser drawer in silence, a multitude of thoughts scrambling for top billing: his mom, Hope’s surgery, his haphazard plan to ambush Jesse. He was exhausted yet unsure if he would be able to turn off his overactive mind.

‘Come here’ Sara said, opening her arms to him. ‘You look wiped.’

He pulled on a pair of sleep pants and did as he was told, letting out a soulful moan as he slipped into his wife’s arms. He was torn between his need to unburden himself and the lack of energy to do so.

‘I love you’ he murmured - as if that explained it all away.

Sara wasn't so easily swayed; she knew this man better than she knew herself. There was lots on his mind but none of it could be solved without a clear mind - and that meant a good night’s sleep.

‘Whatever it is, we can talk about it in the morning’ she said, taking charge. She recalled Linda’s words, the promise she’d made to her mother-in-law to look out for him.

‘Close your eyes Caffrey’ she whispered, her lips on his forehead. ‘I’ll be here for you when you wake up.’

TBC


	56. Chapter 56

The almost imperceptible sound of the walk-in closet door woke Neal from his peaceful sleep. Surprisingly, Sara’s soothing words of comfort the night before had been enough to lull him to sleep and he’d managed to get a solid seven hours - a temporary reprieve from the unrelenting worries which had been plaguing his overactive mind. 

It took a moment to situate himself: it was Friday morning and he quickly made a mental list of what he needed to get done over the next twelve or so hours. There was the situation with his mom of course; these days, she was the first thing on his mind when he woke in the morning and the last before he drifted off to sleep again at night. He needed to start his day at Blue Skies, spend some time with her and have that dreaded conversation with the nursing staff. 

He was anticipating the worst. The previous day, she had appeared unsettled when he’d visited. Her breathing was becoming more and more laboured and she had begun to let out soft moans of discomfort or perhaps even pain as she fought to catch her next breath. Neal was looking forward to the moment when she would be free from the shackles of her elderly, spent body. 

The next step was to up the morphine they’d been administering over the past few days and that, as they say, would be the beginning of the end. According to Sara, she’d had a few sips of water the night before but she’d begun to refuse liquids and everyone knew that once you stopped getting any form of hydration… well, it was a question of hours, days at best. 

Then, there was the situation with Hope. She’d been through an awful lot lately. The break-in continued to haunt her and make her feel unsafe in her own home. Cam had confided to Neal that she was still having trouble sleeping and that, over the past two nights, she’d woken terrified from the bad dreams she’d been having. She was scheduled to have her procedure mid-morning and although Cameron would be with her, Neal wanted to pop by for a short visit once she got back to Cam’s apartment - maybe even talk her and Cam into coming to stay at the house for the weekend. She’d be sore for a few days but Neal knew his daughter was a real trooper; sadly, this was not her first rodeo. 

Next, Neal needed to deal with the aftermath of that little altercation that had taken place at the school the previous day. One of his best teachers, Janelle O’Neill, had been accosted by one of their more rowdy students. If there was one thing Neal did not tolerate at the June Ellington School of Art, it was disrespect for any member of his staff and he wanted to intervene before things escalated. A week long suspension was in store for the young man and Neal wanted to deliver the news himself in order to make sure there were no misunderstandings. He’d arranged a meeting for early afternoon to deal with the situation; he had to try to fit that into his day somehow. 

And then, there was the whole mess with Jesse; if they didn't act soon, he might get suspicious and take off for parts unknown, taking that damn cameo brooch with him. To top it all off, there was Cameron’s insistence on becoming involved in the operation; although he could certainly understand how Cam was feeling about the situation, Neal still wasn't sure how he wanted to deal with it. 

He had a fleeting urge to bury his head under his pillow and not come out until everything was resolved. Instead, he blinked in the early morning light, noticing Sara make her way over to the make-up table in the corner of their bedroom. She was dressed in a fitted grey cashmere turtleneck over a pair of sleek black jeans - certainly not work attire but very elegant, as was the case no matter what she wore.

‘What’s going on?’ he asked, pulling himself up to rest on his elbows. ‘Aren’t you going in to work?’

She put down the mascara she was holding in her hand and turned to face him. ‘Hey, you’re awake!’

‘Unfortunately’ Neal mumbled, not quite sure where that sentiment had come from.

Sara got up and joined him on the bed. ‘Now, that doesn't sound like the Neal Caffrey I know and love’ she said with a warm smile. 

He shrugged. ‘So, where are you going?’

‘I’m going with you silly… to see Linda. You didn't think I was going to let you go alone, did you?’

He scoffed and smiled, a smile of relief. He’d only been awake for about a minute and things were already looking up. He brought his hand to rest on hers and squeezed. 

‘That’d be great’ he admitted. ‘I’ve got a lot going on today.’

‘You feeling any better?’ she asked.

He pursed his lips as he pondered her question. ‘I still have the same problems I had last night… but at least now I’m rested’ he replied after a moment of reflection. ‘Thanks for that back rub by the way.’

‘Well, you looked like you needed something to help you relax. So, tell me, I’ve been dying to know. How did it go with Cam?’

Neal chuckled as he thought back to the discussion from the previous night. ‘Not like I’d imagined at all.’

‘What? Was he upset?’

‘No… actually’ he said, joining her by sitting up on the edge of the bed. ‘Believe it or not, he’s known about my illustrious past for a couple of years now.’

Sara’s face grew tense. ‘What? Hope told him?’

‘Nope, he figured it out all by himself. Some of the students in that art history class I taught a few years back did some digging and apparently, my criminal past isn’t the well kept secret I always thought it was.’

‘I’m sorry…’

Neal shook his head. ‘No, it’s all good. At least it’s out in the open now. Cam says he’s never really given it a second thought.’

Sara looked shocked at the news. ‘I have to admit I didn't see that one coming. Do you think he’s ever discussed it with Hope?’

‘He says they’ve never even talked about it and I believe him. I think Hope would have given me a heads up if she’d known.’

‘Wow! He’s really something else’ Sara said, returning to her seat in front of the mirror. She returned to the task of putting on her face as Neal got to his feet, standing behind her and checking out her reflection in the mirror. 

‘Honey, there’s something else I need to tell you.’

Sara frowned; it was never a good thing when Neal started out a conversation with those choice words. Chances were she wasn't going to like what he had to say.

‘Mozzie got a lead on Jesse and he arranged a meet. Jesse’s looking to fence the cameo.’

Sara stared back at his reflection. That didn't sound like bad news at all.

‘Mozzie told him he had someone interested in buying the piece and Jesse fell for it. Mozzie’s going to arrange a time for the exchange.’

Sara’s face brightened before darkening. ‘So what are you going to do when he shows up, wrestle him for it?’ 

Neal shook his head in amusement. ‘I’m going to give Peter a call, maybe he can use his contacts with NYPD to help set up the arrest.’

‘But…’ he added, speaking more slowly. ‘There is a… small complication.’

‘Okay, I already don’t like this’ Sara said.

Neal held up his hand, silently asking her to listen. 

‘Cameron’s hell bent on being part of the sting. He wants to confront Jesse - whatever that means.’

‘Oh no! Neal, you can’t let him do that’ she said, getting to her feet.

‘I tried to talk some sense into him but he walked in on me and Moz while we were talking about how we were going to handle things and he wants to tag along, pose as the buyer.’

Sara’s eyes grew and she sighed loudly.

Neal carried on, he’d been giving it some thought. ‘Honey, he’s determined to do this and to be honest, if we time it right and I’m there as a lookout—’

‘Yeah, right’ she replied sarcastically. ‘You can arrange it so he’s beating Jesse up just as the police happen on the scene. Or worse yet, as Jesse draws that gun of his and points it directly at Cam. Neal, are you crazy?’ 

‘He’s not going to beat him up Sara… and Jesse won’t have time to draw his gun if we do things right.’

Sara opened her mouth to protest but Neal continued, undeterred.

‘Come on… this is Cam we’re talking about. He… just wants to get a few things off his chest—’

‘Neal, this is totally ridiculous —’

‘It’s NOT Sara, it’s not!’ Neal said, suddenly growing agitated.

Sara’s eyes grew in surprise at his unexpected reaction; whatever this was, it was about a lot more than Cam’s need for revenge. She watched as he tore his eyes away from her probing gaze and let himself fall on the edge of the bed with a thud. 

‘Look, I get it… I understand what Cam is going through’ he said, his voice quiet. ‘After you were assaulted… I felt so… so fucking angry… I wanted to kill the son of a bitch. I used to fantasize about having five minutes alone with that asshole…’

He stopped momentarily, taking a couple of steadying breaths. Sara could see the pink flush appearing on his cheeks, his blood pressure rising as he spoke. She joined him on the edge of the bed and brought her hand to rest on his back. Memories flooded back of that horrible twenty-four hours she’d spent tied to a chair and the monster who’d sexually abused her. They’d been in couples therapy for months following the incident, mostly focussed on helping her regain her sense of security… and her self-confidence. She knew Neal had struggled too - although he hadn't much talked about what he’d discussed during his private sessions with Marion Birch.

‘I didn't know you’d felt that way’ Sara murmured as he shrugged.

He took a good deep breath and stared down at the floor, trying to calm his thumping heart. ‘I know it sounds crazy, it sounds so… macho but I used to imagine in vivid detail how I’d do it, how I’d throw him up against the wall and…’

He spoke with his teeth clenched, the sudden anger pouring out of him. 

‘I knew you struggled after it happened but I didn’t realize just how difficult it had been for you’ Sara said, running her hand through his hair. ‘But it wouldn't have changed anything Neal. They got the guy and he’s going to be in prison for a long time.’

He shrugged. He was no more violent a man than Cameron Armstrong but he’d learned that any man could be driven to violence when someone he loved was threatened - or had been hurt. The thought of Sara being used that way… it still got his blood boiling four years after the fact.

‘I… I even asked Peter if he could get me in to see him in prison.’

Sara’s face tightened but she couldn't help but make light of the matter. ‘What? Were you going to bring your brass knuckles with you?’

Neal gave her a look of hurt and annoyance. 

‘I’m sorry’ Sara said, her smile morphing into a frown. 

‘I didn’t want to… upset you at the time. You had enough to deal with without worrying about me. But Marion helped me work through my rage and… well, I thought I’d let go of it but this thing with Cameron, it’s kind of bringing it all back.’

He turned to face his wife. ‘You saw what a mess Hope was after that night’ he said, swallowing hard. ‘It gets me going and I can only imagine how Cam must feel about it. I know I would have felt better if I’d been able to confront your attacker.’

Sara let her hands drop onto her lap, a gesture Neal interpreted as an act of capitulation.

‘Look, I won’t agree to anything without talking to you first’ he said, taking her hand. ‘I’ll try to come up with something that keeps Cam safe and keeps him from getting arrested but gives him a chance to get things off his chest.’

Sara slipped off the edge of the bed and kneeled on the floor, positioning herself between Neal’s legs. Her arms reached out for him and she laced them around his neck as he leaned forward, his forehead resting against hers.

‘Just remember Caffrey, you’re not alone.’

WCWCWC

Cameron stepped out of the shower to find his fiancée a few feet away, staring at herself in the bathroom mirror. 

‘C-C-Cam, I think I want to cancel’ she declared, turning away from the mirror to face him.

He placed a towel around his hips, grabbing for a second one so he could towel dry his thick mane of dirty blond curls. By the time he’d joined her, she’d returned to studying her reflection in the mirror, eyebrows up, then down, tugging at the edges of her face with her fingertips.

‘What do you mean cancel?’

‘Postpone… I mean postpone’ she muttered continuing to poke around.

‘What’s going on babe? I thought you wanted to get this over with before the wedding.’

She turned to face him and he could see tears forming in her eyes.

‘Hey, hey what’s the matter?’ he said, opening up his arms to her.

Despite the fact he was soaking wet, she didn't hesitate to throw her arms around his waist, her face nestled up against his chest.

‘It’s… everything. Grandma… the break-in… the wedding.’

He brought his hands to rest on her shoulders and pulled her away so he could get a better look at her face.

‘Babe, you’re not doing this for me, are you?’

She shrugged. She’d been the one intent on getting this last bit of cosmetic surgery out of the way. The eyelid lift was barely more than a touch-up, a pure act of vanity. But Cam knew it had been bothering her for months and she’d gotten it in her head that her face was deformed when nothing could be further from the truth. She looked as beautiful as ever and if he was honest, the droopy eyelids gave her a sexy, come-hither look that always got Cam’s heart rate pumping whenever she looked at him. Any way you sliced it, Hope Ellis-Caffrey was a beautiful young woman with bright, intelligent blue eyes, a warm smile and a striking mane of thick, dark wavy hair. Cameron couldn't possibly love her more.

‘But…’ she blubbered, returning to his arms. ‘I wanted to look beautiful for the wedding.’

He laughed despite himself at the inane comment. ‘Come here’ he said, dragging her over to the nearby bedroom where he coaxed her to sit next to him on the edge of the bed.

‘First off, you are the most beautiful woman in the world with or without this surgery’ he said, running his hand through her hair. ‘So, tell me. What’s brought all this on?’

‘It’s just… I was r-r-rereading the information about the procedure and it’s going to t-take a few weeks before I’m looking… looking normal again.’

‘But you knew that going in’ Cam conceded, thinking of the bruising and swelling that would come in the aftermath of the procedure. ‘What’s changed?’

She shrugged and wiped her nose with the back of her hand. ‘G-g-grandma… I’m supposed to rest for a few days and… what if she…’

Cam pulled her in against him, feeling her tremble. That telltale stutter was unmistakeable - a sure sign Hope was stressed out. By all accounts, her grandmother would be passing away soon and having to cope with the surgery and its aftermath as well as the fallout from the break-in was just too much.

‘I want to spend time with her’ she said, her voice growing strong. ‘I don’t want to be resting at home for something so superficial when she’s… slipping away from us.’

‘Well, first off it’s not superficial if it makes you feel better but if you don’t want to do it now, or never for that matter, that’s okay too. I’ll support you, no matter what you decide.’

‘You will?’ she asked, looking up at him with tear filled eyes.

‘Oh, Hope! Of course I will. I don’t give a rat’s ass if you never have this surgery. You’re perfect, just the way you are. I just… I want you to be happy, whatever makes you happy makes me happy.’

Hope shrugged and let her head drop as if thinking of her options.

‘Look, why don’t I call the clinic and tell them we’ve got a family emergency and you can’t come in today. You can take all the time you need to think about it’ he said, lifting her chin with his index finger and forcing her to look at him. ‘And in the meantime, we’ll go over to the nursing home and spend the afternoon with your grandmother.’

Cameron leaned in and pressed his mouth against one of her eyelids and then the other, tasting the saltiness of her tears on his lips. Hope smiled, relieved.

Cam could feel his blood boiling. That asshole’s visit to the Caffrey house had left her feeling skittish and had messed with her mind. Hope didn’t deserve any of this; she’d had enough heartache to last her a lifetime and Cam had made it his personal mission to see to it that she never had another worry for as long as she lived. 

He reigned in his emotions and brought his arms around her, cradling her against him. ‘If you want, we can talk about it when you’re ready’ he began. ‘Or we can never talk about it again. Whatever you want.’ 

WCWCWC

In the end, things at Blue Skies went pretty well as Neal had expected. He and Sara spent a few minutes with Linda, watching her fidget on the bed, sleeping uneasily as she struggled to breathe. Her mouth hung open as if her body was fighting for air, making her face look distorted. From time to time, her eyes would open, her gaze wild and frightened and her mind seemed to grow more detached from reality with every passing moment. 

Neal had seen her just the previous day and he couldn't believe the change in her in just twenty-four hours. He feared she wasn't really seeing him - or anyone else around her - anymore.

At 8:00, after the nursing shift change, Neal and Sara were invited into the small meeting room where they’d chatted with the doctor earlier in the week. This time, Karen, the daytime head nurse, sat across from them, looking very solemn.

‘Mr. and Mrs. Caffrey, as you can see, Mrs. Bennett is really struggling and is growing more and more uncomfortable. We’d like to ease her discomfort and up her medication.’

Sara leaned in, nodding. ‘So, basically she wouldn’t be conscious anymore.’

‘That’s right. This will allow her to rest more comfortably but she will no longer be conscious.’

‘So… how long does she have?’ Neal asked.

‘That depends on the individual but in Mrs. Bennett’s case, with her health as fragile as it is… maybe a couple of days. At best.’

Sara’s hand reached out to touch Neal’s, noticing how clammy it was. 

‘There’s nothing else we can do?’ he asked, his voice subdued.

‘In light of her wishes, we can’t do anything that prolongs her life in any way’ the head nurse explained. ‘That means no intravenous hydration. We can leave the oxygen for now but if she’s calm, we can remove it as well.’

Neal nodded and let out a long slow exhale.

‘Will she know we’re there… I mean in the room with her?’

‘There are a lot of varying opinions as to whether patients can hear what’s going on around them so close to death. I personally like to think that they’re aware of sounds… and touches. It’s comforting for them to know they are not alone.’

‘Will we know… when the time comes?’ Neal asked.

Sara could feel her heart breaking at the sight of her husband. Years ago, before his mom had come back into his life, he’d had to watch June slip away and now he was being called on to do it all over again.

‘Her breathing will become more and more shallow as the end draws near. We’ll continue to monitor her, make sure she remains comfortable. But usually, it happens gradually… you know, these things aren't on a schedule, sometimes patients keep fighting, even though they’re unconscious. Sometimes, they hang on because they think the family isn't ready to let them go.’

Neal turned to look at Sara, his eyes sad. ‘Should we get the whole family over here?’

Sara stared back and shrugged as the nurse spoke up. ‘You could take turns if you don’t want her to be alone. You can’t all be here all the time, that’s exhausting. There’s that lazy-boy chair in her room if someone wants to spend the night. If that’s not possible, don’t fret, I can assure you, we’ll be watching her very carefully. Everybody here at Blue Skies is very fond of her.’ 

‘Thank you… for everything’ Sara said as she got on her feet.

Neal sat there in a trance, digesting what he’d just heard.

‘Honey…’ Sara said reaching out for his hand. ‘Come on, we’ll go sit with her.’

He sighed and nodded. ‘Yeah.’

‘I’ll be in in a few minutes to give her an injection’ the woman said.

Sara held Neal’s hand as they made their way back down to hall towards Linda’s room. She could see his mind working overtime trying to figure out the logistics of how this was going to work - he was probably thinking about Hope’s surgery, about Caitlin, about stuff at work. She could at least help take some of that pressure off, make a few phone calls for him.

‘Sweetie, why don't you go in and let me make a few calls for you. You said you had a meeting at the school this afternoon?’

He nodded vacantly. 

‘I’ll call and tell them you won’t be there, okay?’ Sara offered.

Neal’s mind was still spinning. ‘What about Hope? And Caitlin?’

Sara glanced at her watch, it was still early. ‘You’re right, they should know. Caitlin’s already downstairs at work. And I’ll call Liam, just so he knows. You just… you go in and sit with her, okay?’

‘What about the whole Jesse thing?’ Neal muttered, staring ahead expressionless.

‘I’ll call Mozzie, let him know what’s going on’ she said, her hand resting on his arm. ‘Don’t worry about anything, all right? I’m on it.’

Sara thought of all those times Neal took care of everybody else’s problems. It was time for her to step up to the plate so he could be with his mom and not have to worry about anything else.

They arrived at the door to Linda’s room and stood in the doorway, facing each other.

‘Anything else you need me to do?’ Sara asked, her hands resting on his arms.

He shook his head and leaned over to kiss her forehead in gratitude.

She glanced into the room, seeing her mother-in-law fidgeting on the bed. ‘I’ll be back in a few minutes.’

WCWCWC

‘What do you mean you’re on a bus?’ Sara said.

She’d settled in the common area on one of the couches to make her phone calls. From her vantage point, she could see the hubbub at the nursing station as the staff filled out reports and came in and out with medical equipment or trays with medication.

‘I talked to my professor and she says I can write my exam next week so I decided to hop a bus and come home to see Grandma.’

‘But don’t you have a game tomorrow night?’

‘Yeah… well the coach was pretty understanding and he said I could miss practice today but he really wants me at the game.’

‘Well, where is it? Is it in Syracuse?’

‘No, Pittsburgh. The coach says the team will pay for a plane ticket for me to get there but he wants me there no later than 5:00.’

It was a relief to know Liam would get a chance to see his grandmother one last time. And Sara knew that most of all, Liam’s presence would be a comfort to Neal.

‘All right honey, call when you get here, okay?’

‘Mom… how’s Dad?’

‘He’s keeping it together. But he’ll be glad to see you.’

Her next call was to Cam’s phone. She was somewhat surprised but relieved to hear of Hope’s decision to put off her surgery for the time being. Cam told his soon to be mother-in-law that they would be over by lunchtime to sit with Linda and give the two of them a break. Unbeknownst to Neal, Sara was determined to get him away from Linda’s bedside for an hour or two even if she had to physically drag him out the door. It was her job to keep him healthy over the next little while and that meant he needed to eat and get some rest.

Sara hesitated about calling Caitlin. She had a shift a few floors down at the day care centre and knowing her foster daughter as she did, Sara knew she’d want to drop everything and come up right away. It might be a little overwhelming for all of them to be there at once and Sara made the spontaneous decision to wait a couple of hours and check in with her at lunchtime. 

Her next call was to the school where she spoke to Cindy Harrington, Neal’s right hand woman. No problem, Cindy said, they could deal with things without their boss for a couple of days. All he needed to do was concentrate on spending time at his mom’s bedside in her final hours. She wished the Caffreys well and went off to deal with the day to day running of the school. 

Finally, Sara called Mozzie and was surprised when he answered on the first ring; his radar must have been on full tilt.

‘Tell Neal not to worry about it. If I can, I’ll try to put him off until after the weekend. I’ll make something up about the buyer being out of town. He looked pretty eager to make a deal, he might take the bait.’

‘Do what you can Moz’ Sara said, the thought of the cameo slipping from their grasp suddenly unimportant. ‘It’s only money.’

WCWCWC

There was muted chatter, voices out in the hallway and Neal closed the door to his mom’s room halfway to keep the sounds from floating in. The soft riffs of jazz could be heard coming from the boom box Hope had brought over, a quiet backdrop to the sober events taking place in the room. He took his seat by Linda’s bed, watching her face contort as she squirmed in discomfort.

‘It’s okay Mom’ he murmured, taking her hand. ‘They’re going to give you something to make you feel better.’

The sound of his voice seemed to bring her around and she looked up at him, her face tight, her lips parched. He reached over to grab a facecloth, dipping it in a glass of water and lovingly running the damp cloth on her lips. She smiled weakly and closed her eyes again.

‘Mom, just rest. The nurse is going to give you something to help you sleep’ he said quietly.

Her eyes opened again, blue orbits so like his own. Despite the look of discomfort on every feature of her face, she managed to take in a long slow breath.

‘I’m…. sor… sorry’ she whispered, her voice barely audible.

Neal could feel his chest tightening; he’d lost count of the number of times she’d apologized to him since she’d come back into his life. Whatever mistakes either one of them had made in the past were long forgotten and Neal had grown grateful for the short time he’d had with her.

‘There’s nothing to be sorry about Mom… nothing at all’ Neal said, his voice reassuring. ‘I’ve made plenty of mistakes too.’

He’d barely finished speaking and her eyes had closed once more, her jaw slackening as it had before. She looked so old and so helpless lying there and Neal could feel his heart breaking at the sight of her.

He heard the door to the room creak open and watched Karen step in with a syringe in her hand.

‘How’s she doing?’

‘She opened her eyes for a minute but she's been really restless.’

Karen made her way to the other side of the bed and inserted the needle directly into Linda’s arm. ‘This is going to help you rest Mrs. Bennett’ she said with assurance.

Linda reacted with a brief grimace and opened her eyes - although they were devoid of any recognition. 

‘Neal…’ she managed to say with difficulty as she looked right through him. 

He continued to hold her hand as her eyes fluttered shut.

He didn't know it yet, but that would be the last time he’d look into his mother’s eyes.

TBC


	57. Chapter 57

By 7:00 on Friday night, the whole Caffrey clan was gathered at the Blue Skies Nursing Home in New Rochelle. They’d been taking turns all day sitting by Linda’s bedside and holding her hand while she slept peacefully. Her condition, as described by the nursing staff, was stable but steadily declining.

Now, it was a waiting game. 

While one or two family members sat with her, the rest of the family hung around the nursing home’s communal room located on the first floor of the building, the same one where a couple of months earlier, they’d celebrated the arrival of the new year. 

It was going on eight o’clock and at this hour, the place was eerily quiet. Most of the nursing home’s occupants had been fed and had retired to their rooms for the night, while downstairs, Sara, Hope and Caitlin worked in silence preparing the room so the family could share a meal together. 

‘Maybe I should go up and give Mr. C a break’ Caitlin commented as she and Sara put out some cutlery and some mismatched Corelle dining ware on the large dining room table. 

‘It’s fine’ Sara reminded her with an eyebrow wag. ‘You were with her most of the afternoon.’

‘What’s taking them so long?’ Hope mumbled under her breath as she stared out the large bay window overlooking the parking lot - not that she could see much more than her own reflection now that darkness had descended.

‘Traffic?’ Caitlin offered as an explanation.

Hope shrugged and returned to helping set the table, rummaging through the cupboards for glasses and cups. ‘Did anybody see napkins anywhere?’

Sara pointed. ‘Right in there.’

‘Now…’ she added, looking at both girls sternly, ‘… you heard what your dad said. After we eat, you can go up and say goodnight to Grandma but we want you guys to go home and get some rest. You can take over from us in the morning.’

Caitlin gave an exaggerated sigh. 

‘I mean it Caitlin!’ Sara said. ‘Don’t. Even. Start.’

‘But what if…’

‘If things look like… if we need you to get here in a hurry, we’ll call and you can come on back.’

‘No matter what time it is’ Caitlin said, eyes glued to her foster mom’s face.

‘No matter what time’ Sara agreed. 

‘Are you and Cam going to sleep over at our place?’ she added, turning to face her daughter.

Hope nodded. ‘Yeah, that way we can all be together if… if you need us.’

Voices were heard resonating down the hall, men’s voices which grew louder with the sound of advancing footsteps. Hope walked over to the door and peeked out.

‘Finally’ she said as Cameron and Cody Miller appeared, carrying a large box of Chinese take-out. 

‘Sorry it took so long’ Cam said as he walked past his fiancée and placed a peck on her cheek. ‘Who knew everybody in Scarsdale Park ordered Chinese food on Friday nights?’

‘Here, I’ll take that’ Caitlin said, reaching for the bag of drinks from Cody’s hands.

He glanced around the room; by deduction, it appeared Liam and his dad were still up on the fourth floor in Linda’s room. 

‘Liam still upstairs?’ he asked unnecessarily.

Sara nodded. ‘Would you mind going up and telling them dinner is ready?’

‘I’ll stay with Liam and send Mr. Caffrey down’ Cody said, shrugging out of his jacket and throwing it on a nearby chair.

‘Neal will try to tell you he’s not hungry but he hasn't eaten since breakfast’ Sara said with that look everybody knew never to question. 

‘Got it’ Cody said with a decisive nod. ‘I won’t take no for an answer.’

WCWCWC

‘She looks so peaceful’ Liam commented as he sat across from his dad in the dimly lit room.

Neal nodded in silence, eyes riveted on his mom. She hadn't moved in hours, the increasingly higher doses of morphine keeping her comfortable and deeply sedated. Her breathing had grown more shallow and increasingly irregular throughout the day. She lay on her back, her mouth hanging open as if chasing her next breath but she remained calm, her body relaxed and motionless, a reassuring sight after the last few days of watching her struggle to catch her breath. 

Neal had begun to notice that, every few breaths, there would be a longer pause followed by a few fast and deep breaths, sometimes surprisingly noisy as Linda clung to life. He knew the moment would come when that next intake of air would elude her and she would simply pass away peacefully, unable to carry on. 

The nursing staff had been in to check on her at regular intervals all afternoon, monitoring Linda’s pulse and administering morphine every couple of hours. The calm and peacefulness was in stark contrast to the sounds of daily life which continued to resonate elsewhere in the building. 

‘You okay Dad?’

Neal tore his eyes away from his mom and looked over at his son. ‘Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. I just… I keep hoping she’ll open her eyes again but… I guess that’s not going to happen.’

Liam studied his father’s face, noticing the grey slowly returning to his temples, the crow’s feet more and more pronounced in the corner of his eyes, the way his shoulders slumped when he was tired or worried. It was hard for Liam to imagine that his big, strong dad might someday be in a similar predicament, lying on a bed such as this, life ebbing from him with every passing breath. 

He shook off the macabre thought and returned his gaze to his grandmother. He felt his stomach grumble and wondered if Cody and Cam had returned with the food; he hadn't had anything to eat since breakfast except for that bag of Doritos from the vending machine at the bus station in Syracuse - and those had been stale.

‘You know when your mom flew out to St. Louis to meet Grandma that first time… I was so damn mad at her for meddling’ Neal said, breaking the uneasy silence. 

‘I’d convinced myself that I would never be able to forgive Grandma for what happened when I was a kid. But when we finally came face to face, I realized that… she’d been suffering just as much as I had.’

Liam listened carefully. 

‘Don’t ever let your pride stand in the way, son’ Neal continued wistfully. ‘Don’t ever stay away from someone you love just because you’re too proud to admit you’ve made a mistake.’ 

Neal’s eyes moved to examine Liam, sitting there with his stocking feet propped up on the foot of the bed, his long legs stretched out in front of him. He’d been surprised yet elated to see him walk through the door just a few hours before; after all, Liam was supposed to be in Syracuse, living his busy life. 

‘So, this exam of yours, you’ll be able to make it up?’

‘Yeah, Professor Weber is terrific.’

‘I don’t remember you ever mentioning him before.’

‘Dr. Weber is a she, Anna Weber. She’s brilliant and she’s really interesting to listen to. When I told her what was going on, she told me that when her mom got sick last year, she flew back to Germany to be with her. I guess she understands how important family is.’

Neal reached over and gave his son a loving pat on the leg. ‘Well, I’m glad you’re here. It means a lot to me.’

‘I wish I’d gotten here sooner’ Liam said with a tinge of regret. ‘I didn’t get to say goodbye.’

‘Grandma knows how much she means to you. Besides, I’m pretty sure she knows you’re here right now’ Neal said with a loving glance in her direction.

His right hand had been clasped in hers for the past hour although he hadn’t picked up on any movement on her part. Her skin was growing cool, another sign she was slowly slipping away. Still, it was comforting to know she was no longer suffering and Neal gave her hand a gentle squeeze. 

‘I remember when you took us out to visit her for the first time’ Liam recalled. ‘After Grandma June… well, it was weird to find out I had another grandmother. But when I looked into her eyes… Did you know her eyes are exactly like yours and Hope’s? And she does that thing with her head whenever she’s embarrassed… just like you do.’

Neal smiled. ‘Is that right?’ 

Linda made a hissing sound as she took in some air, startling the two of them.

‘So, that was nice of Cody to surprise you and pick you up at the bus station’ Neal said, fishing for information.

‘I texted him to tell him I was coming home for the night. I guess I was kind of hoping he’d take the hint. Turns out he’s a pretty smart guy.’

Neal grinned. ‘You think there’s a chance you two might get back together?’

Liam shrugged but Neal could see the smile forming on his lips. ‘It’d be nice but… one step at a time, I guess.’

Neal nodded in agreement. ‘So, what time do you have to leave tomorrow?’

‘I’ve got a flight out at noon. Dad, do you think I should stay longer…’cause I could try talking to the coach again…’

‘Buddy, there’s nothing more you can do here and besides, Grandma would be the first to tell you it’s important to respect your commitment to the team.’

There was a soft knock on the door and the two men looked up to see Cody popping his head in. 

‘Dinner’s here’ he murmured softly. ‘Mrs. Caffrey said something like ‘tell Neal if he doesn’t come and eat, I’m coming up and dragging his sorry ass down here myself.’

Neal chuckled softly. ‘Yeah, that sounds like Sara.’

Cody stepped into the room. ‘You go ahead Mr. Caffrey. I’ll stay with Liam until someone relieves us’ he offered.

Neal brought his lips to rest on his mom’s knuckles and placed a gentle kiss on her cool skin. ‘I’ll be right back, Mom’ he whispered.

‘Oh and don’t eat all the crispy spicy beef’ Liam called out as Neal made his way to the door. 

He gave his son a thumbs up and stepped out into the quiet corridor, leaving the two younger men alone.

WCWCWC

It seemed that the closer Neal got to saying his final goodbye to his mother, the more memories from his early childhood came flooding back. To be fair, the happy ones were few and far between and they were buried underneath all those painful years of watching her self-destruct. But those joyful memories were there nonetheless. 

Try as he might, Neal couldn’t recall the short time he’d spent with both his parents in his life. He’d been barely three years old when his dad had been carted off to prison and he and his mom were transferred to St. Louis under the stewardship of the Federal Witness Protection Program. All he knew of his dad were the stories he’d heard from Ellen and his mom — how his dad used to parade him around the house on his broad shoulders, how he carried him up to bed piggyback style, how proud he’d been of his little boy. Those stories and the few photographs Ellen had kept in her possession were the only memories he had of his dad. 

What he did remember all too well was how sad and heartbroken his mom had been after they’d moved to St. Louis. In the beginning, she’d tried hard to keep herself together for his sake but she’d eventually given in to the heartache, unable to overcome the devastation of having had her life turned upside down. 

Neal had a vague recollection of those early years, how she used to read to him at night before putting him to bed and how, when he was in first grade, she used to pack his school lunch, sneaking in those little cheeses wrapped in red wax that had always been his favourites. But that had only lasted a short time and ultimately, she’d begun to self-destruct, unable to cope with the heartbreak of having been abandoned. 

Sadly, the memories that were clearest for Neal were of his mother, struggling to cope with the day to day routine of raising an energetic little boy, falling prey to the allure of the escapist universe provided by drugs and alcohol. Ultimately, she had been unable to care for herself, let alone see to the needs of a young, innocent child.

But if he closed his eyes and tried really hard, he could recall the vague feeling of wellbeing from those very early years, the smiles, the warm hugs, the comfort of his mother’s arms. It enveloped him like a warm blanket on a cold winter day. That’s what he wanted to cling to after she was gone and he was bound and determined to keep those memories alive. But even more importantly, he was grateful for the last few years, how he and his mom had gotten past the bitterness, how they’d managed to mend their fractured relationship and how Sara and the kids had gotten to know her. He was especially grateful for her influence in Caitlin’s life at a time when he was finding it difficult to deal with the rambunctious teen. Underneath all that heartbreak, Linda Bennett was a truly amazing woman: warm, kind, loving, generous and above all else, courageous in the face of adversity. 

‘More rice?’ Sara asked, interrupting Neal’s musings.

She held a large serving spoon poised over his plate, her eyes fixated on his. He knew what she wanted him to say but he really couldn’t stomach another bite. 

‘I’m stuffed babe’ he muttered although he’d barely eaten a thing.

‘Come on, honey. One more bite’ she coaxed. ‘Do it for your mom.’

But it was too late; Neal was already on his feet. ‘I was thinking I’d go for a little walk before I head back upstairs’ he said instead, stretching his back. ‘Anybody want to come along?’

‘I’ll come with you’ Hope offered as she pushed away her empty plate. ‘I need to walk off all this food.’

Contrary to her dad, she’d had a full helping — and a half. And besides, she was looking forward to a few minutes alone with him. Cam had told her about their discussion the night before - minus his interest in getting involved in the search for Jesse Davis, of course - and she was eager to talk to her dad about it.

The two of them slipped on their coats and stepped out the front door of the nursing home and into the cool evening air. After a few minutes of silence, Hope tucked her arm into her dad’s and squeezed his arm lovingly. 

‘A penny for your thoughts’ she said as he scoffed.

‘I guess I’m pretty transparent on that score’ he admitted, looking into her eyes in the shadow of a passing streetlamp.

‘I know it’s hard Dad but we need to be thankful Grandma isn't suffering anymore.’

Neal nodded; she was right of course. He shook off the nostalgia and changed gears. ‘So, did Cam tell you about our little chat last night?’ 

Hope let out a puff of air, her warm breath visible in the cool night air. ‘Who knew I was about to marry an undercover detective with an uncanny ability to keep a secret? I told you you had nothing to worry about.’

‘Yeah but not for the reasons you thought’ he replied.

‘I knew it wouldn't make a lick of difference to him. Cam loves you Daddy and he has a lot of respect for you.’

They turned the corner, slowly making their way back towards the nursing home. ‘He’s a keeper honey, that’s for sure.’

‘Cam tells me you had quite the fan club while you were teaching that art history class at NYU’ she teased. ‘All those starry-eyed girls, batting their eyelashes at you.’ 

‘I don’t know about that’ Neal said, self-deprecatingly. ‘Young girls can be so impressionable. Speaking of which, what happened this morning? When we talked last night, your surgery was a go.’

Hope leaned into him, feeling his strong body against hers. ‘It’s… it’s just not that important, not right now anyway. I didn't want to miss out on being with Grandma one last time because I was stuck convalescing at home.’

‘But it’s important to you, sweet pea. At least it was the last time we spoke about it.’

She shrugged. ‘I guess it’s all relative. What’s happening with Grandma… that’s a lot more important and I didn't want to be sidelined. We need to pull together right now and be there for each other.’

Neal patted her gloved hand and let his hand to linger on hers as they continued their stroll. ‘You know you’re right. Since Grandma came back into our lives, it’s given me new insight into how important family really is.’

He sighed loudly. ‘After your accident, when I started spiralling out of control, Grandma helped me get my bearings. She knew what it was like to fall into the dark pit of alcohol abuse. Of course, I fought her all they way but in the end, you and Grandma were the ones who pulled me out of that dark hole. That letter you wrote asking me to agree to get help… it was what made me realize I needed to get better. And Grandma helped me see what I was at risk of losing. She’d lost everything once and she was so grateful to have been given another chance. She didn't want me to lose everything your mom and I had worked so hard to build together.’

‘So you’re glad Mom went behind your back?’

He gave her an amused look. ‘Don’t tell her but yeah, I’m glad your mom is as pig-headed as she is. She’s usually right.’

Hope grew quiet.

‘You want a little unsolicited advice from your old man?’ he asked.

She knew he would give it no matter what she replied.

‘Always keep the lines of communication open in your marriage. So many times, Mom and I don’t see eye to eye, so many times, we argue. But that door… we never close each other off no matter how hurt or angry we are and no matter how much we think the other person is wrong or is making a mistake. Respect each other and you’ll always find a way back to each other. Your mother… she stood by me even when I abandoned her —’

‘Dad! That’s not true. You never abandoned Mom…’

‘It is true, honey and I’m going to spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to her. I know how close I came to losing it all because I couldn't cope with what happened to you. I still get a twinge of guilt whenever I see you struggle, whenever I notice you stuttering…’

‘Seriously Dad, you have such a Superman complex. You’re always so hard on yourself.’

‘I just thank God every day that you came back to us and that Grandma came back into our lives. As hard as it is to let her go… not having had her in my life in the first place would have been a million times worse.’

Hope heard his voice start to tighten. ‘Remember what you told me after Grandma June died?’  
Neal shook his head. ‘You told me that after a while, even though our hearts would always be heavy, we would begin to have happy memories of her. Now, look at you, every day you go into the art school and you try to make Grandma June proud and whenever you talk about her it’s with a smile on your face even though I know there’s a little piece of your heart that will always be missing. You’ll see, it’ll be the same with Grandma.’

Neal looked over at his daughter, marvelling at the wisdom of her words. ‘How did you ever get so smart?’

She shrugged. ‘I guess it’s those Caffrey genes.’ 

WCWCWC

‘She looks so… fragile’ Cody whispered.

Liam had been sitting there holding his grandmother’s hand for the past ten minutes, seemingly in a trance.

‘I wish I’d known her when I was younger’ he said quietly.

‘So what happened exactly? How come she was estranged from your dad?’

Liam squirmed a little, uneasy about sharing too much about his dad’s past, especially his life as an ex-con - something Cody knew nothing about.

‘They… had a falling out when my dad was a teenager. My grandmother was a mess after my grandfather left and she started drinking… anyway, my dad decided to try to make it on his own and he left home and came to New York when he was eighteen.’

Cody nodded. He’d met Liam’s grandma June, his godmother, and he’d always been a little confused about the complicated family history of the Caffrey family. There were uncles and aunts and grandparents who weren’t blood relatives, not that it mattered to him — Liam loved his family and that was all that mattered. 

He leaned in and brought his hand to rest on Liam’s back, rubbing gently to Liam’s delight.

‘So, you weren't too disappointed to see me standing there unannounced when you got off the bus?’

Liam turned towards him, momentarily letting go of Linda’s hand. He leaned in and placing his hands on either side of Cody’s face, he held it in place, moving in for a gentle kiss. 

‘What do you think?’ he said with a smirk. ‘You know my grandma always liked you. Every time I saw her, she’d ask me if we were going to get back together again.’

The two men remained agonizingly close, their lips mere inches apart. ‘Is that right?’

‘Uh huh.’

‘By the way, I broke up with Justin’ Cody blurted out unexpectedly, their foreheads practically touching.

‘Oh yeah?’ Liam replied with a naughty grin. ‘Too much whining and burping in public?’

Cody was the one who moved in for the kiss this time, his lips cushiony soft, his kiss purposeful. ‘You know, a guy can only take so much public burping.’

Liam chuckled softly. ‘This is true.’

The two men opened their arms to one another, lacing them around each other’s solid bodies, their lips finding each other without any awkwardness. Cody could feel Liam trembling slightly as the emotions rose in his chest: his grandmother was dying and this sad circumstance was somehow bringing them closer together. 

It was the classic definition of ‘mixed emotions’.

Liam pulled away. ‘I’m really glad you’re here with me Cody’ he murmured softly, his voice a little shaky.

‘I’m really glad I’m here too.’

WCWCWC

The phone rang in the Caffrey home just as the sun was coming up on Saturday morning. Caitlin was the first to jump on it. She’d dragged the house phone up to bed with her the night before and had fallen asleep with it under her pillow, intent on being ready to answer in an instant should it ring. The truth was she hadn't slept much at all since she, Hope, Cameron and Liam had turned in. Cody had gone home, regrettably leaving Liam behind but promising to check in with him in the morning before he boarded his plane for Pittsburgh. Cameron had bunked in with Hope upstairs on the third floor as he'd done in the weeks following her release from hospital years before. Even Raffie seemed to pick up on the sadness emanating from his humans as they all settled in for the night, choosing to curl up at the foot of Liam’s bed without the usual whimpering for a tummy rub.

Caitlin sat up straight as a ramrod in response to the shrill sound of the phone and before she’d hung up, the other three occupants of the house were standing at the foot of her bed, waiting for the news from New Rochelle.

WCWCWC

The overnight nurse carried out a final check of Linda’s pulse and heart rate; she was going off shift in a few minutes and Neal couldn’t help but notice how she took her time, placing Linda’s hand delicately by her side before saying goodbye one last time. As was the case in all good nursing homes, the residents of Blue Skies were attached to the devoted staff who cared for them - and vice versa. It was a privilege for staff to share the all important journey of their patients - their final journey. 

‘It won’t be long now’ she said softly as she placed a hand on Neal’s arm in an attempt to comfort him.

As the overnight hours passed, Neal and Sara had begun to notice that Linda’s extremities were growing increasingly cool to the touch.   
Neal tucked an extra blanket snuggly around his mom’s frail body, making sure her feet were well tucked in. He returned to holding her hand, caressing it lovingly in his. Her skin felt like rice paper, thin and brittle, every vein visible through the surface. The early morning light had begun to peek through the window, giving the room an amber glow and Neal noticed the skin on her hand had begun to look blotchy. The same bluish-grey tint was visible around her mouth, a sure sign her blood circulation was poor as her body continued to shut down. 

Linda let out a rattling sound Neal was fast becoming familiar with as she attempted to take in a lungful of air. The sound was followed by an eerie silence and, as he’d done all night, Neal stilled his breathing and waited, mentally counting down the seconds, wondering if she would take another breath. He counted to twenty-six, his eyes growing with concern as the seconds ticked by. Finally, Linda took another breath and Neal exhaled in relief. 

There was a soft rustling in the doorway and he lifted his eyes to find Sara standing there, looking totally done in. He had sent her on an important errand; it was time to rally the troops and he hoped the kids would get there before it was too late. Although, at his insistence, she had spent the last couple of hours in the comfortable lazy boy chair, sleep had been fleeting. Her hair was mussed and the cashmere sweater and casual slacks that had looked so crisp and fresh a mere twenty-four hours earlier were looking crumpled and unkempt. 

She made her way to stand behind Neal, running her hands down his back and up to his shoulders, feeling the tension settling there. Her hand moved to caress his hair, brushing away a wayward strand that had landed across his forehead, making him look so much more vulnerable. She leaned in over his shoulder, placing a kiss on his cheek and whispering in his ear.

‘The kids are on their way.’

He just nodded, his eyes riveted on his mom.

‘Mom, it’s okay’ he murmured as Sara listened, tears glistening in her eyes. ‘The kids will be here soon.’

He heard a strangled sound as Sara tried unsuccessfully to restrain a sob and he felt his throat tighten. He swallowed hard and watched as she moved in closer to Linda, leaning down to kiss her forehead.

‘I love you Linda’ he heard her whisper as she gently stroked her thinning hair. ‘Don’t worry about him. I’ll take good care of your little boy.’

WCWCWC

It was breakfast time for the residents of Blue Skies when Hope, Liam, Caitlin and Cameron stepped through the doors of the nursing home. The fourth floor lounge was bustling with residents as staff served food, dispensed medication and generally saw to the needs of their patients. The foursome headed down the hall and despite the muted clanging of cutlery against dishes and the soft voices, they could sense a sober veil of silence as they got closer to Linda Bennett’s room. 

There were hugs all around as Sara reported on the events of the last few hours - which were pretty well the same as the day before. Neal remained quiet as he’d been all night, lacking energy to do anything but just sit there, his eyes riveted on his mom. 

Within moments of their arrival, the Caffreys formed a protective shield around Linda, surrounding her with love. Neal clasped Sara’s hand in his and caressed his mom’s cold, lifeless knuckles with the other. Her breathing grew ever more tedious, every breath sounding like it might be the last - and yet, she continued to rally. 

The room grew quiet, Caitlin crying softly while tears silently ran down Hope’s cheeks. Liam and Cam remained stoic, the sound of their breathing echoing in the room. The intervals between Linda’s laboured breaths grew increasingly lengthy and with each interruption, everyone’s ears perked up as they held their own breath and waited.

The uneasy silence was broken when Neal spoke, his voice gentle yet strong. 

‘Mom, we’re all here with you’ he murmured, echoing everyone’s thoughts. ‘It’s okay if you want to let go. We’re all going to be fine.’ 

Despite his determination to stay strong, his voice began to falter and he felt Sara’s hand squeezing his and keeping him grounded. 

‘You’ll always be in our thoughts and in our hearts’ Sara added as a sob escaped Caitlin’s lips. Liam moved in closer and put his arm around her as Cam held Hope, the four of them huddled together. 

As if she’d heard their voices, Linda Bennett took in one last breath and exhaled slowly. There was complete silence for a few seconds, the seconds growing into minutes as everyone watched her face relax, finally free from the shackles of her tired, spent body. 

She had come to the end of her long journey, leaving this world peacefully, surrounded by those she loved.

TBC


	58. Chapter 58

By 7:00 on Friday night, the whole Caffrey clan was gathered at the Blue Skies Nursing Home in New Rochelle. They’d been taking turns all day sitting by Linda’s bedside and holding her hand while she slept peacefully. Her condition, as described by the nursing staff, was stable but steadily declining.

Now, it was a waiting game. 

While one or two family members sat with her, the rest of the family hung around the nursing home’s communal room located on the first floor of the building, the same one where a couple of months earlier, they’d celebrated the arrival of the new year. 

It was going on eight o’clock and at this hour, the place was eerily quiet. Most of the nursing home’s occupants had been fed and had retired to their rooms for the night, while downstairs, Sara, Hope and Caitlin worked in silence preparing the room so the family could share a meal together. 

‘Maybe I should go up and give Mr. C a break’ Caitlin commented as she and Sara put out some cutlery and some mismatched Corelle dining ware on the large dining room table. 

‘It’s fine’ Sara reminded her with an eyebrow wag. ‘You were with her most of the afternoon.’

‘What’s taking them so long?’ Hope mumbled under her breath as she stared out the large bay window overlooking the parking lot - not that she could see much more than her own reflection now that darkness had descended.

‘Traffic?’ Caitlin offered as an explanation.

Hope shrugged and returned to helping set the table, rummaging through the cupboards for glasses and cups. ‘Did anybody see napkins anywhere?’

Sara pointed. ‘Right in there.’

‘Now…’ she added, looking at both girls sternly, ‘… you heard what your dad said. After we eat, you can go up and say goodnight to Grandma but we want you guys to go home and get some rest. You can take over from us in the morning.’

Caitlin gave an exaggerated sigh. 

‘I mean it Caitlin!’ Sara said. ‘Don’t. Even. Start.’

‘But what if…’

‘If things look like… if we need you to get here in a hurry, we’ll call and you can come on back.’

‘No matter what time it is’ Caitlin said, eyes glued to her foster mom’s face.

‘No matter what time’ Sara agreed. 

‘Are you and Cam going to sleep over at our place?’ she added, turning to face her daughter.

Hope nodded. ‘Yeah, that way we can all be together if… if you need us.’

Voices were heard resonating down the hall, men’s voices which grew louder with the sound of advancing footsteps. Hope walked over to the door and peeked out.

‘Finally’ she said as Cameron and Cody Miller appeared, carrying a large box of Chinese take-out. 

‘Sorry it took so long’ Cam said as he walked past his fiancée and placed a peck on her cheek. ‘Who knew everybody in Scarsdale Park ordered Chinese food on Friday nights?’

‘Here, I’ll take that’ Caitlin said, reaching for the bag of drinks from Cody’s hands.

He glanced around the room; by deduction, it appeared Liam and his dad were still up on the fourth floor in Linda’s room. 

‘Liam still upstairs?’ he asked unnecessarily.

Sara nodded. ‘Would you mind going up and telling them dinner is ready?’

‘I’ll stay with Liam and send Mr. Caffrey down’ Cody said, shrugging out of his jacket and throwing it on a nearby chair.

‘Neal will try to tell you he’s not hungry but he hasn't eaten since breakfast’ Sara said with that look everybody knew never to question. 

‘Got it’ Cody said with a decisive nod. ‘I won’t take no for an answer.’

WCWCWC

‘She looks so peaceful’ Liam commented as he sat across from his dad in the dimly lit room.

Neal nodded in silence, eyes riveted on his mom. She hadn't moved in hours, the increasingly higher doses of morphine keeping her comfortable and deeply sedated. Her breathing had grown more shallow and increasingly irregular throughout the day. She lay on her back, her mouth hanging open as if chasing her next breath but she remained calm, her body relaxed and motionless, a reassuring sight after the last few days of watching her struggle to catch her breath. 

Neal had begun to notice that, every few breaths, there would be a longer pause followed by a few fast and deep breaths, sometimes surprisingly noisy as Linda clung to life. He knew the moment would come when that next intake of air would elude her and she would simply pass away peacefully, unable to carry on. 

The nursing staff had been in to check on her at regular intervals all afternoon, monitoring Linda’s pulse and administering morphine every couple of hours. The calm and peacefulness was in stark contrast to the sounds of daily life which continued to resonate elsewhere in the building. 

‘You okay Dad?’

Neal tore his eyes away from his mom and looked over at his son. ‘Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. I just… I keep hoping she’ll open her eyes again but… I guess that’s not going to happen.’

Liam studied his father’s face, noticing the grey slowly returning to his temples, the crow’s feet more and more pronounced in the corner of his eyes, the way his shoulders slumped when he was tired or worried. It was hard for Liam to imagine that his big, strong dad might someday be in a similar predicament, lying on a bed such as this, life ebbing from him with every passing breath. 

He shook off the macabre thought and returned his gaze to his grandmother. He felt his stomach grumble and wondered if Cody and Cam had returned with the food; he hadn't had anything to eat since breakfast except for that bag of Doritos from the vending machine at the bus station in Syracuse - and those had been stale.

‘You know when your mom flew out to St. Louis to meet Grandma that first time… I was so damn mad at her for meddling’ Neal said, breaking the uneasy silence. 

‘I’d convinced myself that I would never be able to forgive Grandma for what happened when I was a kid. But when we finally came face to face, I realized that… she’d been suffering just as much as I had.’

Liam listened carefully. 

‘Don’t ever let your pride stand in the way, son’ Neal continued wistfully. ‘Don’t ever stay away from someone you love just because you’re too proud to admit you’ve made a mistake.’ 

Neal’s eyes moved to examine Liam, sitting there with his stocking feet propped up on the foot of the bed, his long legs stretched out in front of him. He’d been surprised yet elated to see him walk through the door just a few hours before; after all, Liam was supposed to be in Syracuse, living his busy life. 

‘So, this exam of yours, you’ll be able to make it up?’

‘Yeah, Professor Weber is terrific.’

‘I don’t remember you ever mentioning him before.’

‘Dr. Weber is a she, Anna Weber. She’s brilliant and she’s really interesting to listen to. When I told her what was going on, she told me that when her mom got sick last year, she flew back to Germany to be with her. I guess she understands how important family is.’

Neal reached over and gave his son a loving pat on the leg. ‘Well, I’m glad you’re here. It means a lot to me.’

‘I wish I’d gotten here sooner’ Liam said with a tinge of regret. ‘I didn’t get to say goodbye.’

‘Grandma knows how much she means to you. Besides, I’m pretty sure she knows you’re here right now’ Neal said with a loving glance in her direction.

His right hand had been clasped in hers for the past hour although he hadn’t picked up on any movement on her part. Her skin was growing cool, another sign she was slowly slipping away. Still, it was comforting to know she was no longer suffering and Neal gave her hand a gentle squeeze. 

‘I remember when you took us out to visit her for the first time’ Liam recalled. ‘After Grandma June… well, it was weird to find out I had another grandmother. But when I looked into her eyes… Did you know her eyes are exactly like yours and Hope’s? And she does that thing with her head whenever she’s embarrassed… just like you do.’

Neal smiled. ‘Is that right?’ 

Linda made a hissing sound as she took in some air, startling the two of them.

‘So, that was nice of Cody to surprise you and pick you up at the bus station’ Neal said, fishing for information.

‘I texted him to tell him I was coming home for the night. I guess I was kind of hoping he’d take the hint. Turns out he’s a pretty smart guy.’

Neal grinned. ‘You think there’s a chance you two might get back together?’

Liam shrugged but Neal could see the smile forming on his lips. ‘It’d be nice but… one step at a time, I guess.’

Neal nodded in agreement. ‘So, what time do you have to leave tomorrow?’

‘I’ve got a flight out at noon. Dad, do you think I should stay longer…’cause I could try talking to the coach again…’

‘Buddy, there’s nothing more you can do here and besides, Grandma would be the first to tell you it’s important to respect your commitment to the team.’

There was a soft knock on the door and the two men looked up to see Cody popping his head in. 

‘Dinner’s here’ he murmured softly. ‘Mrs. Caffrey said something like ‘tell Neal if he doesn’t come and eat, I’m coming up and dragging his sorry ass down here myself.’

Neal chuckled softly. ‘Yeah, that sounds like Sara.’

Cody stepped into the room. ‘You go ahead Mr. Caffrey. I’ll stay with Liam until someone relieves us’ he offered.

Neal brought his lips to rest on his mom’s knuckles and placed a gentle kiss on her cool skin. ‘I’ll be right back, Mom’ he whispered.

‘Oh and don’t eat all the crispy spicy beef’ Liam called out as Neal made his way to the door. 

He gave his son a thumbs up and stepped out into the quiet corridor, leaving the two younger men alone.

WCWCWC

It seemed that the closer Neal got to saying his final goodbye to his mother, the more memories from his early childhood came flooding back. To be fair, the happy ones were few and far between and they were buried underneath all those painful years of watching her self-destruct. But those joyful memories were there nonetheless. 

Try as he might, Neal couldn’t recall the short time he’d spent with both his parents in his life. He’d been barely three years old when his dad had been carted off to prison and he and his mom were transferred to St. Louis under the stewardship of the Federal Witness Protection Program. All he knew of his dad were the stories he’d heard from Ellen and his mom — how his dad used to parade him around the house on his broad shoulders, how he carried him up to bed piggyback style, how proud he’d been of his little boy. Those stories and the few photographs Ellen had kept in her possession were the only memories he had of his dad. 

What he did remember all too well was how sad and heartbroken his mom had been after they’d moved to St. Louis. In the beginning, she’d tried hard to keep herself together for his sake but she’d eventually given in to the heartache, unable to overcome the devastation of having had her life turned upside down. 

Neal had a vague recollection of those early years, how she used to read to him at night before putting him to bed and how, when he was in first grade, she used to pack his school lunch, sneaking in those little cheeses wrapped in red wax that had always been his favourites. But that had only lasted a short time and ultimately, she’d begun to self-destruct, unable to cope with the heartbreak of having been abandoned. 

Sadly, the memories that were clearest for Neal were of his mother, struggling to cope with the day to day routine of raising an energetic little boy, falling prey to the allure of the escapist universe provided by drugs and alcohol. Ultimately, she had been unable to care for herself, let alone see to the needs of a young, innocent child.

But if he closed his eyes and tried really hard, he could recall the vague feeling of wellbeing from those very early years, the smiles, the warm hugs, the comfort of his mother’s arms. It enveloped him like a warm blanket on a cold winter day. That’s what he wanted to cling to after she was gone and he was bound and determined to keep those memories alive. But even more importantly, he was grateful for the last few years, how he and his mom had gotten past the bitterness, how they’d managed to mend their fractured relationship and how Sara and the kids had gotten to know her. He was especially grateful for her influence in Caitlin’s life at a time when he was finding it difficult to deal with the rambunctious teen. Underneath all that heartbreak, Linda Bennett was a truly amazing woman: warm, kind, loving, generous and above all else, courageous in the face of adversity. 

‘More rice?’ Sara asked, interrupting Neal’s musings.

She held a large serving spoon poised over his plate, her eyes fixated on his. He knew what she wanted him to say but he really couldn’t stomach another bite. 

‘I’m stuffed babe’ he muttered although he’d barely eaten a thing.

‘Come on, honey. One more bite’ she coaxed. ‘Do it for your mom.’

But it was too late; Neal was already on his feet. ‘I was thinking I’d go for a little walk before I head back upstairs’ he said instead, stretching his back. ‘Anybody want to come along?’

‘I’ll come with you’ Hope offered as she pushed away her empty plate. ‘I need to walk off all this food.’

Contrary to her dad, she’d had a full helping — and a half. And besides, she was looking forward to a few minutes alone with him. Cam had told her about their discussion the night before - minus his interest in getting involved in the search for Jesse Davis, of course - and she was eager to talk to her dad about it.

The two of them slipped on their coats and stepped out the front door of the nursing home and into the cool evening air. After a few minutes of silence, Hope tucked her arm into her dad’s and squeezed his arm lovingly. 

‘A penny for your thoughts’ she said as he scoffed.

‘I guess I’m pretty transparent on that score’ he admitted, looking into her eyes in the shadow of a passing streetlamp.

‘I know it’s hard Dad but we need to be thankful Grandma isn't suffering anymore.’

Neal nodded; she was right of course. He shook off the nostalgia and changed gears. ‘So, did Cam tell you about our little chat last night?’ 

Hope let out a puff of air, her warm breath visible in the cool night air. ‘Who knew I was about to marry an undercover detective with an uncanny ability to keep a secret? I told you you had nothing to worry about.’

‘Yeah but not for the reasons you thought’ he replied.

‘I knew it wouldn't make a lick of difference to him. Cam loves you Daddy and he has a lot of respect for you.’

They turned the corner, slowly making their way back towards the nursing home. ‘He’s a keeper honey, that’s for sure.’

‘Cam tells me you had quite the fan club while you were teaching that art history class at NYU’ she teased. ‘All those starry-eyed girls, batting their eyelashes at you.’ 

‘I don’t know about that’ Neal said, self-deprecatingly. ‘Young girls can be so impressionable. Speaking of which, what happened this morning? When we talked last night, your surgery was a go.’

Hope leaned into him, feeling his strong body against hers. ‘It’s… it’s just not that important, not right now anyway. I didn't want to miss out on being with Grandma one last time because I was stuck convalescing at home.’

‘But it’s important to you, sweet pea. At least it was the last time we spoke about it.’

She shrugged. ‘I guess it’s all relative. What’s happening with Grandma… that’s a lot more important and I didn't want to be sidelined. We need to pull together right now and be there for each other.’

Neal patted her gloved hand and let his hand to linger on hers as they continued their stroll. ‘You know you’re right. Since Grandma came back into our lives, it’s given me new insight into how important family really is.’

He sighed loudly. ‘After your accident, when I started spiralling out of control, Grandma helped me get my bearings. She knew what it was like to fall into the dark pit of alcohol abuse. Of course, I fought her all they way but in the end, you and Grandma were the ones who pulled me out of that dark hole. That letter you wrote asking me to agree to get help… it was what made me realize I needed to get better. And Grandma helped me see what I was at risk of losing. She’d lost everything once and she was so grateful to have been given another chance. She didn't want me to lose everything your mom and I had worked so hard to build together.’

‘So you’re glad Mom went behind your back?’

He gave her an amused look. ‘Don’t tell her but yeah, I’m glad your mom is as pig-headed as she is. She’s usually right.’

Hope grew quiet.

‘You want a little unsolicited advice from your old man?’ he asked.

She knew he would give it no matter what she replied.

‘Always keep the lines of communication open in your marriage. So many times, Mom and I don’t see eye to eye, so many times, we argue. But that door… we never close each other off no matter how hurt or angry we are and no matter how much we think the other person is wrong or is making a mistake. Respect each other and you’ll always find a way back to each other. Your mother… she stood by me even when I abandoned her —’

‘Dad! That’s not true. You never abandoned Mom…’

‘It is true, honey and I’m going to spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to her. I know how close I came to losing it all because I couldn't cope with what happened to you. I still get a twinge of guilt whenever I see you struggle, whenever I notice you stuttering…’

‘Seriously Dad, you have such a Superman complex. You’re always so hard on yourself.’

‘I just thank God every day that you came back to us and that Grandma came back into our lives. As hard as it is to let her go… not having had her in my life in the first place would have been a million times worse.’

Hope heard his voice start to tighten. ‘Remember what you told me after Grandma June died?’

Neal shook his head. ‘You told me that after a while, even though our hearts would always be heavy, we would begin to have happy memories of her. Now, look at you, every day you go into the art school and you try to make Grandma June proud and whenever you talk about her it’s with a smile on your face even though I know there’s a little piece of your heart that will always be missing. You’ll see, it’ll be the same with Grandma.’

Neal looked over at his daughter, marvelling at the wisdom of her words. ‘How did you ever get so smart?’

She shrugged. ‘I guess it’s those Caffrey genes.’ 

WCWCWC

‘She looks so… fragile’ Cody whispered.

Liam had been sitting there holding his grandmother’s hand for the past ten minutes, seemingly in a trance.

‘I wish I’d known her when I was younger’ he said quietly.

‘So what happened exactly? How come she was estranged from your dad?’

Liam squirmed a little, uneasy about sharing too much about his dad’s past, especially his life as an ex-con - something Cody knew nothing about.

‘They… had a falling out when my dad was a teenager. My grandmother was a mess after my grandfather left and she started drinking… anyway, my dad decided to try to make it on his own and he left home and came to New York when he was eighteen.’

Cody nodded. He’d met Liam’s grandma June, his godmother, and he’d always been a little confused about the complicated family history of the Caffrey family. There were uncles and aunts and grandparents who weren’t blood relatives, not that it mattered to him — Liam loved his family and that was all that mattered. 

He leaned in and brought his hand to rest on Liam’s back, rubbing gently to Liam’s delight.

‘So, you weren't too disappointed to see me standing there unannounced when you got off the bus?’

Liam turned towards him, momentarily letting go of Linda’s hand. He leaned in and placing his hands on either side of Cody’s face, he held it in place, moving in for a gentle kiss. 

‘What do you think?’ he said with a smirk. ‘You know my grandma always liked you. Every time I saw her, she’d ask me if we were going to get back together again.’

The two men remained agonizingly close, their lips mere inches apart. ‘Is that right?’

‘Uh huh.’

‘By the way, I broke up with Justin’ Cody blurted out unexpectedly, their foreheads practically touching.

‘Oh yeah?’ Liam replied with a naughty grin. ‘Too much whining and burping in public?’

Cody was the one who moved in for the kiss this time, his lips cushiony soft, his kiss purposeful. ‘You know, a guy can only take so much public burping.’

Liam chuckled softly. ‘This is true.’

The two men opened their arms to one another, lacing them around each other’s solid bodies, their lips finding each other without any awkwardness. Cody could feel Liam trembling slightly as the emotions rose in his chest: his grandmother was dying and this sad circumstance was somehow bringing them closer together. 

It was the classic definition of ‘mixed emotions’.

Liam pulled away. ‘I’m really glad you’re here with me Cody’ he murmured softly, his voice a little shaky.

‘I’m really glad I’m here too.’

WCWCWC

The phone rang in the Caffrey home just as the sun was coming up on Saturday morning. Caitlin was the first to jump on it. She’d dragged the house phone up to bed with her the night before and had fallen asleep with it under her pillow, intent on being ready to answer in an instant should it ring. The truth was she hadn't slept much at all since she, Hope, Cameron and Liam had turned in. Cody had gone home, regrettably leaving Liam behind but promising to check in with him in the morning before he boarded his plane for Pittsburgh. Cameron had bunked in with Hope upstairs on the third floor as he'd done in the weeks following her release from hospital years before. Even Raffie seemed to pick up on the sadness emanating from his humans as they all settled in for the night, choosing to curl up at the foot of Liam’s bed without the usual whimpering for a tummy rub.

Caitlin sat up straight as a ramrod in response to the shrill sound of the phone and before she’d hung up, the other three occupants of the house were standing at the foot of her bed, waiting for the news from New Rochelle.

WCWCWC

The overnight nurse carried out a final check of Linda’s pulse and heart rate; she was going off shift in a few minutes and Neal couldn’t help but notice how she took her time, placing Linda’s hand delicately by her side before saying goodbye one last time. As was the case in all good nursing homes, the residents of Blue Skies were attached to the devoted staff who cared for them - and vice versa. It was a privilege for staff to share the all important journey of their patients - their final journey. 

‘It won’t be long now’ she said softly as she placed a hand on Neal’s arm in an attempt to comfort him.

As the overnight hours passed, Neal and Sara had begun to notice that Linda’s extremities were growing increasingly cool to the touch.   
Neal tucked an extra blanket snuggly around his mom’s frail body, making sure her feet were well tucked in. He returned to holding her hand, caressing it lovingly in his. Her skin felt like rice paper, thin and brittle, every vein visible through the surface. The early morning light had begun to peek through the window, giving the room an amber glow and Neal noticed the skin on her hand had begun to look blotchy. The same bluish-grey tint was visible around her mouth, a sure sign her blood circulation was poor as her body continued to shut down. 

Linda let out a rattling sound Neal was fast becoming familiar with as she attempted to take in a lungful of air. The sound was followed by an eerie silence and, as he’d done all night, Neal stilled his breathing and waited, mentally counting down the seconds, wondering if she would take another breath. He counted to twenty-six, his eyes growing with concern as the seconds ticked by. Finally, Linda took another breath and Neal exhaled in relief. 

There was a soft rustling in the doorway and he lifted his eyes to find Sara standing there, looking totally done in. He had sent her on an important errand; it was time to rally the troops and he hoped the kids would get there before it was too late. Although, at his insistence, she had spent the last couple of hours in the comfortable lazy boy chair, sleep had been fleeting. Her hair was mussed and the cashmere sweater and casual slacks that had looked so crisp and fresh a mere twenty-four hours earlier were looking crumpled and unkempt. 

She made her way to stand behind Neal, running her hands down his back and up to his shoulders, feeling the tension settling there. Her hand moved to caress his hair, brushing away a wayward strand that had landed across his forehead, making him look so much more vulnerable. She leaned in over his shoulder, placing a kiss on his cheek and whispering in his ear.

‘The kids are on their way.’

He just nodded, his eyes riveted on his mom.

‘Mom, it’s okay’ he murmured as Sara listened, tears glistening in her eyes. ‘The kids will be here soon.’

He heard a strangled sound as Sara tried unsuccessfully to restrain a sob and he felt his throat tighten. He swallowed hard and watched as she moved in closer to Linda, leaning down to kiss her forehead.

‘I love you Linda’ he heard her whisper as she gently stroked her thinning hair. ‘Don’t worry about him. I’ll take good care of your little boy.’

WCWCWC

It was breakfast time for the residents of Blue Skies when Hope, Liam, Caitlin and Cameron stepped through the doors of the nursing home. The fourth floor lounge was bustling with residents as staff served food, dispensed medication and generally saw to the needs of their patients. The foursome headed down the hall and despite the muted clanging of cutlery against dishes and the soft voices, they could sense a sober veil of silence as they got closer to Linda Bennett’s room. 

There were hugs all around as Sara reported on the events of the last few hours - which were pretty well the same as the day before. Neal remained quiet as he’d been all night, lacking energy to do anything but just sit there, his eyes riveted on his mom. 

Within moments of their arrival, the Caffreys formed a protective shield around Linda, surrounding her with love. Neal clasped Sara’s hand in his and caressed his mom’s cold, lifeless knuckles with the other. Her breathing grew ever more tedious, every breath sounding like it might be the last - and yet, she continued to rally. 

The room grew quiet, Caitlin crying softly while tears silently ran down Hope’s cheeks. Liam and Cam remained stoic, the sound of their breathing echoing in the room. The intervals between Linda’s laboured breaths grew increasingly lengthy and with each interruption, everyone’s ears perked up as they held their own breath and waited.

The uneasy silence was broken when Neal spoke, his voice gentle yet strong. 

‘Mom, we’re all here with you’ he murmured, echoing everyone’s thoughts. ‘It’s okay if you want to let go. We’re all going to be fine.’ 

Despite his determination to stay strong, his voice began to falter and he felt Sara’s hand squeezing his and keeping him grounded. 

‘You’ll always be in our thoughts and in our hearts’ Sara added as a sob escaped Caitlin’s lips. Liam moved in closer and put his arm around her as Cam held Hope, the four of them huddled together. 

As if she’d heard their voices, Linda Bennett took in one last breath and exhaled slowly. There was complete silence for a few seconds, the seconds growing into minutes as everyone watched her face relax, finally free from the shackles of her tired, spent body. 

She had come to the end of her long journey, leaving this world peacefully, surrounded by those she loved.

TBC


	59. Chapter 59

The bus was quiet as it usually was on the way back from a game, never more so than following a crushing defeat. Most of the guys were either napping or listening to music, trying to come down from the adrenaline rush of the last few hours. One thing was for sure, there wouldn’t be any celebrating on the bus tonight.

Josh Monteith glanced over his shoulder towards the back of the bus. Yup, Liam was still in the hot seat or as the players liked to call it ‘purgatory row’. The three coaches were in the habit of sitting back there and it was the place they summoned players to for friendly little ‘chats’ after the games - a euphemism for a good old fashioned chewing out following a less than stellar performance.

He could see Liam nodding, eyes avoiding the coach’s glare. You didn't say much when you were invited down to purgatory row, you just shut the fuck up and listened, trying to look contrite - not that that was much of a stretch. Liam had been down there a good ten minutes. How long did it take to tell someone they’d messed up - especially when said person was already fully aware of their shortcomings?

Finally, coach Reynolds stopped talking and Liam got to his feet with his head appropriately bowed and returned to the seat next to Josh; truth was, he would have slithered over if he could have. A few of the other players looked up, some in sympathy, some with what appeared to be a warped look of delight - all of them relieved it wasn't their name that had been called to ‘come on down’ and keep the coach company.

‘So how bad was it?’ Josh asked under his breath.

‘On a scale of one to ten? I figure about an eight’ Liam replied, keeping his voice down. ‘Not that I have anything to compare it to.’ 

Thankfully, it had been his first invitation to purgatory row and he hoped it would be his last for a good long while. College sports was a new experience for Liam - nothing like what he’d known in high school. This was high stakes stuff and Liam had been hailed as one of the shining stars for the Orange - a fresh new face with talent and modesty, a rare combination. Although it was still early on in the season, there were already whispers around the league about him being in contention for rookie of the year — as the coach had just reminded him. Not that it meant that much to Liam; he was just glad to have made the cut and have a chance to play the game he loved. But still, it was no badge of honour to be chewed out when you knew all too well you’d messed up.

Josh kept his voice down, not wanting to attract attention. ‘Well, look at it this way, not everybody gets invited to sit with the coach for a friendly chat after the game.’ 

Liam rolled his eyes and grabbed for his backpack, pulling out his phone and a set of earbuds. 

‘Hey, wait a minute Caffrey’ Josh said, hand on his arm. ‘You didn't tell me what happened when you went home.’

Liam had landed in Pittsburgh just in time to make it to the Petersen Sports Complex for the warm-up and he’d launched right into his pre-game ritual. A quick wave in Josh’s direction was all he’d had time for before they’d taken the court.

‘She died this morning’ he said, his voice quiet.

‘Oh man, I’m sorry. I didn't realize.’

Liam shrugged. ‘I’m just glad I was there when it happened. I wanted to be there for my folks, especially my dad.’

Josh was used to Liam being understated about most things; after all, young Caffrey was no drama queen. Josh had grown up with an older brother who was openly gay - ‘out there’ gay, flamboyant, loud, expressive, not unlike Todd Greenway and the total antithesis of his roomie. Growing up, he thought all gay guys were like that until his brother had started dating his fiancé, the most low-key, macho guy he could imagine. So much for stereotypes.

He brought his hand to rest on Liam’s arm and gave an encouraging squeeze. ‘Does the coach know what happened?’

‘He asked… and I told him but he also gave me a speech about how you need to rise above personal shit when you’re playing at this level.’

Josh nodded. They were still young to have to deal with such high expectations. ‘So what happens now?’

‘I’ll have to go back to New York for the funeral on Wednesday. My dad’s going to spring for plane fare so I don’t have to miss any classes. I’ll be back in Syracuse by Thursday afternoon.’

‘You didn't talk much about your grandmother…’

‘To be honest, we were all just getting to know her, you know with her living in St. Louis and everything. She’s only lived in New York a couple of years.’

Josh listened in silence.

‘But it was important to my dad to have her close by and…’ 

He stopped suddenly and turned to look at his roomie, his face growing serious. ‘My dad asked if I’d say a few words at the funeral, you know like a eulogy.’

‘Really?’

Liam shrugged. ‘He says he doesn't think he’s up to doing it himself so I said I would.’

‘Wow… have you ever done anything like that before?’

Liam shook his head. ‘My dad did it when my Grandma June died.’ He hesitated for a moment. ‘I’ll figure it out.’

‘I can give you a hand if you like… I was valedictorian at my high school graduation, I had to write the speech and everything.’

‘You’re kidding’ Liam said with a smile - the first one that had graced his lips in a while it seemed. ‘Yeah, that’d be great.’

Josh flipped over the book he’d set aside earlier and settled in to read while Liam plugged his earbuds into his phone.

The rumble of the engine continued, the only sound heard on the bus.

WCWCWC

Neal heard footsteps outside the bedroom door and disentangled himself from the furnace that was Sara’s body, letting himself fall onto his back. He brought his arms up behind his head as he blinked the sleep away. The glow from the rising sun shone against the far wall giving the room an orange glow as he pulled his thoughts together. He was relieved to have gotten some sleep and grateful to be facing the day rested. He checked the time as he heard some distant clanging of pots and pans coming from the kitchen; it was awfully early for Caitlin to be up considering she still hadn't gotten home by the time he’d fallen asleep the night before. 

Of all the kids, he worried most about her in the aftermath of Linda’s passing. He knew Hope would miss her grandmother but she was strong and she had Cam to turn to for solace and support. Besides, when it came to expressing emotions, Hope wasn’t afraid to speak up, she was always in your face and he and Sara could always see any kind of meltdown coming from a mile out. Somehow, it was reassuring to know what she was thinking… well, at least most of the time.

Her brother, however, was a whole other kettle of fish. Liam was their sensitive child and Neal and Sara had chatted briefly before bed about the need to keep a close eye on him as they navigated the events of the coming week. Of course it didn't help that he was in another city, away from their watchful eye. Neal had checked in on him immediately after the game the night before and had been somewhat relieved to find Liam was in his bubble, still focussed on his performance and the fallout from not having been at his best. It was just as well he was focussed on something other than his grandmother’s passing. Luckily, Liam had the uncanny ability of compartmentalizing the various parts of his life, a good thing when you were as sensitive a young man as he was.

But Caitlin… well, she was like a powder keg that could blow at any moment. Outwardly, she might seem like she was coping but it was impossible to know what was going on under the surface. In the past, her go-to coping methods had always been rather dubious - and mostly self-destructive. Caitlin had been known to disappear for hours on end doing God knew what, drinking, partying with ‘friends’, getting into trouble and more often than not, leaving Neal and Sara to pick up the pieces. 

Neal’s mind turned to the funeral arrangements. Once the decision had been made to cut their losses with the Mickey and Minnie Mouse Funeral Home, he’d finally been able to relax. Now, all that was left was to decide if they should go with cremation or a traditional burial. Neal still couldn't figure out what his mom’s true wishes were in that regard - had she chosen cremation as the cheaper of the options or was that her sincere wish? 

The rest of the arrangements were basically just busy work: choosing a time for the ceremony, determining the sequence of readings, music selection, testimonials and finally the death announcements, the menu and so forth. He felt his breath grow shaky as he got a flash of his mom, lying lifeless on her bed. He swallowed down the lump that was forming in his throat and glanced in Sara’s direction. 

Thank God for his wonderful, level-headed wife. She knew instinctively what he needed and it had been an incredible relief to unfurl that huge knot in his belly and let out the avalanche of tears he’d been holding back. Once he’d managed to let go, his body had been able to relax and now, he was feeling stronger, strong enough to keep it together for the rest of the family. 

WCWCWC

Caitlin cringed as the cast iron pan slipped from her hand and hit the counter with a clatter; so much for letting her foster parents sleep in. Despite her monster hangover, she was eager to make amends for her behaviour the night before. Sara was right, she’d made a promise to her grandmother to be strong - both for herself and for Neal - and it was time to step up to the plate.

The numerous jello shots she’d ingested the night before had allowed her to sleep for a solid six hours before her bladder had begun to scream for attention. Now that she was up, she stared bleary-eyed at the contents of the fridge and grabbed for eggs, some bacon and milk and coffee, intent on making a start of breakfast. She set everything out on the counter and got busy putting on a pot of coffee. There was an excellent chance Hope would be dropping by and if history was any indication, it wouldn't take long for Mozzie to make an appearance and Mr. and Mrs. Burke wouldn't be far behind. That’s generally what happened in the Caffrey clan, everyone pulled together in times of need. 

Caitlin had known Neal Caffrey long enough to recognize when he was putting up a front. As both Liam and Sara had pointed out, there had been an awful lot going on in the man’s life lately. Caitlin wasn't privy to all the details but she knew he’d recently had some health issues and her little skirmish with Liam over the Christmas holidays hadn’t helped in that regard. There’d been that whole mess with Jesse for which she felt partly responsible and although she tried not to meddle in their affairs, it was obvious that things had been tense between her foster parents as of late. Now that Neal had lost his mom, the last thing he needed was to worry about her acting out on top of everything else. She wondered if Sara had ratted her out to him as she turned on the coffeemaker. 

She heard the sound of a toilet flushing in the distance; somebody was up. If it was Sara, she needed to gear up to put forth a heartfelt apology for her behaviour last night. And if it was Neal… well, she owed it to herself and to him to pull herself together and try her very best not to fall apart. 

She had broken a couple of eggs into a bowl and was reaching for some milk when he appeared, looking surprisingly rested in a t-shirt and a pair of silk sleep pants. 

‘Good morning’ he called out, heading straight for the pot of coffee. ‘You’re up early.’

Caitlin kept working, whisking some milk into the eggs as Neal took a seat at the table.

‘I thought you might be hungry when you got up’ she said, her voice quiet. ‘Scrambled all right?’

Neal nodded and smiled. ‘How did you sleep?’ he asked her. ‘Did you get in late last night?’

She chose to ignore the second question and focussed on the first one instead. ‘I slept pretty well… considering.’

Neal watched her from behind as she toiled away, whisking away at those eggs, placing a dollop of butter into the frying pan. It seemed like busy work. 

‘Why don’t you leave that for a minute and come sit down. There’s something I want to talk to you about.’

Shit, she thought. Busted. Sara must have told him about her little outing the night before.

‘I want to talk to you about the funeral arrangements’ Neal said, surprising her.

‘The funeral arrangements? But Grandma said she’d taken care of all that.’

Neal sighed and took a sip of coffee before continuing. ‘She had. But… it turns out this place she’d made arrangements with, well, it’s not the kind of place we want for her.’

‘What do you mean?’

Neal shook his head, sparing her the details. ‘Let’s just say… I want more for Grandma than what they can offer. I’m having her transferred to another much nicer funeral home.’

Caitlin nodded and listened, fighting hard to keep the tears from returning. 

‘It’s not too far from here, over on Fisher Avenue and after the ceremony, Sara and I have decided to invite everyone back here for a bite to eat.’

‘That’s a good idea’ Caitlin said, her voice wavering. ‘Grandma would have liked that.’

It was Neal’s turn to nod. ‘I’m just… I’m struggling with whether we should do a traditional burial or if we…’ he let his voice trail. 

‘Grandma told me she’d made arrangements for cremation.’

Neal’s eyes began to fill with tears and he coughed, wiping them as inconspicuously as possible - which was not inconspicuously at all.

‘I know… I know but… honey, do you think Grandma really wanted that or was she… was she just trying to choose something she could afford?’

Caitlin’s eyes narrowed and she almost immediately shook her head. ‘No, no, we talked about it. She told me she really wanted to be cremated. She said she didn't want to take up all that space and… well, she didn't say so but I got the feeling maybe she wanted to… to be close to us.’

Neal frowned. He’d always thought it was strange when people kept their loved ones in an urn over their fireplace or kept them on their bedroom dresser. It seemed macabre and… well, just plain weird. He tried to visualize having his mother’s remains in the living room watching over them or in the family room where they cheered on Liam and the Orange, or worse yet, in the bedroom where he made love to his wife. 

‘You mean like… here in the house?’ he asked tentatively. 

Caitlin smiled, despite the solemnity of the topic they were discussion. ‘No! Of course not, that’d be… just weird.’

Neal exhaled as she continued. ‘But I’ve been thinking… do you think it would be strange if we maybe planted a tree in the backyard this spring to remember her by. Maybe we could sprinkle her ashes in the ground or something…’

Her breathing grew laboured and she let out a choked sob. Neal put his hand on hers.

‘I think that’s a great idea Caitlin’ he said, patting her hand. ‘I can find out if there’s any by-law preventing us from doing that…’

Sara appeared and stood in silence, taking in the tail end of the conversation and letting it play out, pleased to see the two of them sharing a moment. Apparently, she’d made the right decision keeping Neal out of the loop regarding Caitlin’s little nocturnal adventure. 

‘Mr. C’ she heard Caitlin say. ‘Would it be all right… do you think I could say a few words at the funeral?’

Neal wiped his eyes and nodded as he smiled at her, surprised by the request. ‘You think you’re up to it?’

She nodded as she took in a deep breath. ‘I really want to.’

‘I think Grandma would have liked that very much’ Neal said, looking up and noticing Sara standing there. ‘Don’t you think so, honey?’

Sara took a few steps and brought her hands to rest on Caitlin’s shoulders. To the young woman’s surprise, Sara leaned down and placed a gentle kiss on the top of her head. 

‘I think it’s a wonderful idea.’

WCWCWC

Once you got past the irony of its name, the Burns Funeral Home and Crematorium looked to be a fine, upstanding institution. Nobody got to choose their last name, after all. The place, as Neal had hoped, was classy and perfectly appropriate for the celebration of life he had planned for his beloved mom. 

By noon Sunday, he’d arranged to have Linda’s remains moved from the Mickey Mouse Funeral Home over to Burns and he and Sara had had a meeting with the staff to discuss the details of the celebration. He made a mental note to put in a complaint to the Better Business Bureau when this was all over; nobody should have to deal with such an insensitive place when dealing with the loss of a loved one.

By the time they returned home, Mozzie, Peter and Elizabeth were all there as were Hope and Cam. Neal took a couple of quiches out of the freezer for lunch and threw them in the oven while Sara and El got busy preparing a salad. The men retired to the living room, as Peter and Neal had done the day before, out of hearing range of the women, who were busy discussing the menu for the wake.

Peter and Cam sat with a beer while Mozzie sipped on his usual glass of Merlot. It wasn't often Neal got the urge to have a drink but he silently wished he could join them today, just a little something to blur the edges a little. He shook off the thought and got down to the business at hand.

‘So what have you got Moz?’ he asked.

‘He’s getting antsy’ the man said, his voice low. ‘He called me twice to see when we could schedule the exchange.’

‘How much did you tell him you could get for it?’

‘I told him the buyer was prepared to offer twenty.’

Neal wagged his eyebrows and looked at Peter. ‘That’s roughly half what it’s worth’ he explained. 

It was par for the course. 

‘It sounds like the guy did his homework’ Peter commented.

Neal turned to look at Mozzie. ‘Did you tell him the buyer wanted to be there for the swap?’

Mozzie nodded. ‘He didn't even bat an eye. All he kept asking was if the guy would have the cash on him or if he needed to see the piece first.’

‘What did you tell him?’ Cameron asked.

Mozzie looked over at Neal as if telegraphing his unease with this whole crazy arrangement. ‘I told him the buyer wanted to see the piece but that he’d have the money on him and was prepared for a quick transaction.’

Neal sighed; yet another complication.

‘I know…’ Mozzie continued. ‘…but otherwise I was going to lose him.’

Neal turned to face Peter. ‘How do you want to handle it? We’ve got to have something to show him or he’ll spook. Can you… talk to Jones maybe?’

Peter nodded. If it was just a question of having a stack of bills to flash, the FBI always had some funny money floating around for sting operations. 

Cameron sat on the edge of his seat, listening to the exchange and practically jumping out of his skin. Peter and Neal had worked on undercover assignments on countless occasions and Mozzie was a pro at this kind of thing but Cam didn't have a clue how it all worked. All he knew was that he was seething with anger and couldn't wait to get his hands on this guy and give him a piece of his mind for what he'd done to Hope.

Peter felt the nerves radiating off the younger man; if Cam didn't reign it in, this could amount to a recipe for disaster. ‘Cam, we can’t afford to have you lose your cool.’

‘I won’t’ Cam said, a little too quickly.

‘You will’ Peter argued. ‘I can see it in your eyes. If you don’t calm down, this whole thing can go south in the blink of an eye. There are already too many moving parts here. Jesse carries a gun and he’ll be on high alert.’

‘I can do this’ Cameron insisted.

Neal and Peter exchanged worried glances; maybe involving Cameron had been a colossal mistake. Neal heard the sound of Hope’s laughter echoing in the kitchen. She would be plenty angry with him if something went wrong. The last thing he wanted was his daughter becoming a widow before she was even a bride.

Neal refocussed his attention on Peter. ‘Did you already talk to Jones?’

Peter nodded. ‘He’s prepared to treat this as a recovery on an anonymous tip but Sterling Bosch has to put in an official report on the theft.’

‘That’s just it. Technically, this is Sara’s property. It has nothing to do with Sterling Bosch’ Neal reminded him.

Peter shook his head. ‘Don’t worry about it. Clinton says he’ll handle it himself with a couple of agents. We just need to make sure we’ve eventually got paper work to back it up.’

‘All right’ Neal said, taking charge. ‘Now, we need to choreograph this so that nothing goes wrong.’ 

WCWCWC

Neal was standing at the sink staring down at Mozzie’s abandoned glass of Merlot when Sara walked into the kitchen. The house, which moments earlier, had been full of activity had grown quiet now that the guests had departed and Sara held back, silently observing the distant look in her husband’s eyes. Her first impression was that he was thinking of his mom but she was about to find out that her husband’s mind had wandered to another dark place: a more worrisome one. 

She froze as she watched Neal bring the half full glass of wine up to his nose and inhale deeply. He closed his eyes in pure rapture, a look he usually reserved just for her. For a moment there, she was certain he was going to take a sip, perhaps down the whole thing in one big gulp. But Neal seemed to come out of his trance and, in a rapid motion, he resolutely pulled the glass away from his lips and dumped the remains down the sink, proceeding to rinse the glass and place it on the countertop next to him. 

He startled as he noticed Sara standing there. Had she been watching him?

‘Hey’ he said, forcing a smile.

‘Hey’ she countered. She came to stand behind him and ran her hands up his back, reaching his shoulders and giving a firm squeeze. She felt the tension there and she continued kneading his shoulders as he let out a loud sigh. He turned to face her, noticing how pale and tired she looked. It had been a rough couple of days for all of them and they weren't out of the woods yet.

‘You look beat’ he murmured softly.

She shrugged. ‘I need to go to the office for a few hours tomorrow. You okay with that?’

‘Yeah, yeah of course. There’s no point sitting around here just… waiting for Wednesday to roll around.’

‘What about you?’ she asked, running her hand down his cheek. ‘Are you going to go to work?’

She saw the look of indecision in his eyes. ‘I might go in to the gallery for an hour or two… and I was thinking I might pay Jim McDougall a visit.’

Was that his way of broaching the delicate subject? If he wanted to talk about the temptation he’d just barely resisted, she was all ears but he had to be the one to bring it up. She wasn't about to push it. It was a sticky subject and the last thing she wanted was for Neal to think she was watching him… and judging him. 

‘Oh yeah? How come?’ she prodded, waiting to see if he’d confide in her.

There was silence except for the drip, drip, drip of the kitchen faucet. Neal reached out to quiet it, avoiding Sara’s eyes. He tried his best to brush it off as just a routine kind of thing. 

‘You know… whenever there’s additional stress, it can lead to a relapse… I just want to make sure I’m staying on top of things.’

Sara nodded, unwilling to confess what she’d witnessed moments before. It broke her heart every time she saw him struggling - which up until recently, hadn't been all that often. Having alcohol around could be avoided most of the time and Neal had learned to deal with social situations where alcohol was served. It certainly wasn't at the centre of his universe any more but there were still moments when she could see that it bothered him, times when he would have enjoyed having a beer or a good glass of wine with friends. 

She couldn't offer him booze but she had other ways of making him feel better - at least ways of distracting him until the urge passed. She moved in a little closer, bringing her lips to his and kissed him soundly, feeling him relax under her touch. She was rewarded with a gentle smile.

He leaned in, whispering in her ear. ’I’ve missed you. I’ve missed us.’

She kissed him again and this time, he could feel himself getting lost in her lips. He inhaled the wonderful scent of her perfume, his hands reaching to frame her face before getting tangled in the softness of her hair as he drew her near, suddenly overcome with longing for her. 

When he pulled away, his eyes narrowed. ‘Is it wrong that I want to make love to you?’ he asked.

She smiled and chuckled softly. ‘How could it be wrong to want to make love to me?’

He shook his head at the absurdity of what he'd said. Although his mom’s passing was still fresh, abstaining from having sex with the woman he loved wasn't going to bring his mother back. But it might make him feel a whole lot better.

He became overwhelmed with emotion, a hodgepodge he would have difficulty defining with any kind of clarity: crushing grief, sadness, restlessness, unexpected longing and desire.

‘I love you’ he said, letting his hands roam down to circle her waist. ‘And I need you.’

She needed him too, Sara realized as she brought her hands up to caress his thick head of hair. She felt a pressing need to feel his arms around her, to look into his eyes as they fluttered in abandon, to inhale his comforting musky scent, to hear his uneven breathing as he lost himself in her, to taste the saltiness of his glistening skin.

She opened her mouth to reply but the words got stuck in her throat as her eyes filled with unexpected tears. Instead she reached around to take his hand and silently pulled him towards the stairs, up to the safety and sanctity of their bedroom.

TBC


	60. Chapter 60

Except for a fresh new coat of paint in a muted shade of slate grey, the outer office looked just as it had the dozen or so times Neal had been there before. The waiting room was shared by three health care professionals who rented office space on the third floor of the building: a marriage counsellor with the off-putting name of Dr. Susan Dooms, a psychologist who dealt with weight management issues and James McDougall, a man whose profession was addictions counsellor but who, with time, had come to be so much more for Neal Caffrey. 

Jim McDougall had been bigger than life - in more ways than one - when Neal had first met him. A retired football player, the man had clocked in at almost four hundred pounds when Neal had first met him almost five years earlier. Although he had retained his bigger than life personality, the man had shed about half his body weight in the intervening years. He had a big booming voice which hadn't diminished despite the weight loss, a jovial laugh that echoed off the walls of his office and dark skin that glistened as if he’d just run a marathon. He had probing eyes, the sort of eyes that betrayed all emotion and when he smiled, which was often, his eyes would sparkle and the corners of his eyes would crinkle like he knew some deep dark secret about you - and liked it. 

Jim could always be counted on to give sound advice or to just listen patiently whenever Neal had something on his mind. He never judged, yet Neal could always tell from the look on his face when he’d said something particularly outlandish or self deprecating just by the way the man’s dark brown eyes widened as he listened - a tried and true barometer for Neal’s musings and an effective way to bring his client back to reality.

Of course, strictly speaking, Jim McDougall wasn't a friend. He never could be. Neal had plenty of those already and more importantly, he had Sara and Peter to confide in about all of life’s daily ups and downs. But with both his wife and his best friend, there were deep emotional ties which sometimes made it difficult to confide about his private yet all too genuine fears that he might someday trip up and tumble once more into the dark black hole of alcohol abuse. 

Sure, both Sara and Peter had a rational understanding of the phenomenon known as alcoholism but neither one of them had actually lived through the nightmare. Not like Jim McDougall. As a reformed alcoholic himself, the man knew all too well how booze could get an unrelenting hold on you, a grip so strong some never managed to keep their head above water or walk away unscathed. 

Although his meetings with the counsellor had grown few and far between, Neal still felt the need to check in from time to time. Certainly, the incident in Mel’s Diner had shaken him up and now, with his mom’s death, he was feeling particularly vulnerable to the lure of a good stiff drink to take the edge off the powerful emotions her sudden departure had aroused. He’d scared himself shitless the night before when he’d found himself staring down into that glass of ruby red wine. On any given day, it was fairly easy to remind himself of what was at stake if he ever gave in. But every once in a while, like that fleeting moment the night before, there was an almost irresistible urge to throw caution to the wind and just dive in, let the calming properties of a good tumbler of scotch do its thing and dull the emotions that were threatening to eat him up alive.

With the funeral a couple of days away, there was no better time to talk things out, to remind himself of how lost he’d felt during his descent into booze hell, how powerless and terrified he’d been that he would never find his way out. And most importantly, remind himself why he never wanted to feel that way again.

He stood in the waiting room, waiting for his turn to speak to the young woman manning the reception desk. Ahead of him, stood an older gentleman who was chatting away with her as if they both had all the time in the world. Neal glanced around the waiting room, noticing the short hallway which led to the washrooms. He flashed back to the first time he’d ever visited James McDougall. On that day, he’d popped into the men’s room to guzzle down a couple of generous gulps of the scotch he’d gotten into the habit of stashing in the inside pocket of his jacket - close to his heart. 

Never again, he thought.

Neal tapped his foot impatiently as the man ahead of him hemmed and hawed about a date for his next appointment. Neal hadn't called ahead but he was hoping Jim had a few minutes for him. In the past, the man had always been there in times of crisis. But was this really a crisis? Or was he blowing these feelings of self-doubt way out of proportion? It had been almost five years since he’d slayed the beast; oh, he’d had his fair share of close calls but he’d always managed to step away from temptation. 

Surely, he could do the same this time around.

He thought of Sara, his main reason for keeping himself in check. During those awful few months when his day to day life had revolved around the appeal of a bottle of Jack Daniel’s, Sara had been the one to suffer the most. With Hope in hospital, making slow but steady progress, Neal had done nothing short of capitulating his role as supportive husband, choosing instead to walk around in a drunken stupor. 

Oh sure, he’d visited Hope every single day, spent a couple of hours each and every morning by her hospital bed, pretending all was right with the world. Most of the time, he was hung over, hell, he’d even visited her while he was tanked. But when it came to really being there, when it came to being the kind of husband Sara needed, the kind of husband she deserved, when it came to supporting her through the worst tragedy life had chosen to inflict on them as parents, well, he’d been nowhere to be found, emotionally unavailable, MIA. He had no greater regret and in hindsight, he considered his disappearing act an unforgivable breach of their sacred wedding vows. 

Sara had forgiven him; he still wasn't quite sure how. Or why. And he’d promised her - and himself - that he would never stray again as long as he lived. Nowadays, when he got the urge to take that first drink, it was her face that instantly came to mind, her beautiful, smiling eyes that appeared in his mind’s eye, her soft voice that reminded him that she was there for him, that she believed in him, that he could resist. So far, it had been enough to keep him from falling into the abyss but Neal lived in fear that one day, his weak, pathetic need for a good bottle of scotch might finally outweigh all that was wonderful and right with his life. 

His mind began to wander and his eyes landed on the pretty young woman behind the desk who was doing her best to be patient with Mr. Can’t Make Up His Mind. He recognized her as the same person who’d worked the reception desk since the first time he’d visited and now, for some reason, he was having trouble remembering her name. Neal hated it when that happened. He prided himself on being a person’s person and part of that meant taking the time to remember people’s names and address them personally whenever they crossed his path. 

‘Kathy… Patty… Kelly…’ he murmured under his breath, trying a few names on for size and rejecting them all summarily.

Damn it! It used to be so easy to recall names but as of late, his memory wasn't what it used to be. 

He continued wracking his brain. ‘Sandy… Amy… Audrey…. Cindy…’

The gentleman standing ahead of him finally stepped away from the desk as Neal began to panic, coming face to face with the smiling receptionist. 

He took a step forward and returned her smile. ‘Hi Jenny!’ he called out miraculously with a sigh of relief. ‘It’s nice to see you again.’

‘Mr. Caffrey! Hi!’ the woman said. It seemed she didn't suffer the same lapses in recollection he did. Her smile intensified, no doubt pleased that he’d remembered her name.

‘How are you?’ Neal asked, suddenly recalling a few choice details about the young woman. ‘How’s that gorgeous baby girl of yours?’

It was all coming back to him now, how she’d been away for a while on maternity leave. A photograph of a smiling toddler wearing a bright blue dress with green polka dots sat on her desk, helping jog his memory. 

Jenny the receptionist beamed as she glanced at the photograph. ‘She’s wonderful. Thanks for asking. Almost three years old if you can believe it.’

Neal could believe it; watching his own kids morph into adults had been one of the most unsettling if not rewarding things he’d ever witnessed.

He smiled at her kindly. ‘I was wondering… does Jim have any openings today?’

‘Oh, I’m sorry. Mr. McDougall is on holidays this week. He took his son down to South Carolina for a week of golf.’

Neal felt his stomach drop. He’d been counting on having a few minutes to bounce things off Jim. Nevertheless, he pasted on a Caffreyesque smile, hiding his disappointment.

He watched as Jenny looked through a stack of papers on her desk, locating what she was looking for. ‘Mr. McDougall left the name of a colleague of his… in case you need to see someone urgently’ she explained.

Neal tried to shrug it off, unwilling to show any signs of desperation. ‘No, no. That won’t be necessary. What’s his schedule like next week?’

She was already looking through her appointment book. ‘He has a couple of openings early in the week’ she offered.

He sighed. ‘Sure. Monday?’

‘Yeah, he could see you at three on Monday afternoon.’

Neal nodded and gave her another blistering Caffrey smile - nothing to see here, it said.

‘Perfect. Well, you have a good day Jenny’ he said as he walked away, a little more disappointed than he’d expected.

He walked away with his shoulders slightly slumped. He could do this.

WCWCWC

Jesse Davis glanced down excitedly at the bus ticket he’d just purchased and stuffed it back into his coat pocket. He gave his backside a quick pat - a nervous gesture to be sure - and felt the gun securely tucked into the edge of his pants. He was feeling great, strong, omnipotent, on top of the world. He was about to make the biggest score of his pathetic young life and then he was heading back down to warmer climates, back to Florida and his old stomping grounds and away from all the drama with the women in his life. 

He was disappointed Caitlin hadn't seen fit to help him with a bigger score but apparently his baby sister had fallen prey to the Caffrey curse - the doctrine of the high and mighty who had no idea what it was like to have to struggle every day just to survive. She was a lost cause and at this point in his life, he was ready to cut off any and all ties to his family and get on with his life. Still, his journey in the Big Apple had paid dividends; he’d made a few bucks off the stuff he’d lifted from the Caffrey place and he’d managed to live in their home for a short while, all expenses paid.

He nervously checked his watch for the umpteenth time; his meeting with the fence was in a couple of hours, just enough time for one last little bit of mischief before he hit the road for good. 

He’d been watching the entrance to the three story building in Flushing for about an hour when he finally saw her coming up the street. She was alone and was carrying a large package that looked like a canvas as well as what appeared to be a bakery box. She smiled at an older woman who was coming out of the building - perhaps a neighbour. She might be entering the building alone, Jesse reflected, but was her boyfriend waiting for her inside? 

Only one way to find out. 

He waited long enough for her to make her way inside the apartment and grabbed for his phone, punching in the number he’d stored there.

‘Hello?’ came the female voice.

He immediately recognized the sweet sound of her voice. ‘Hey, is Cameron in?’ he asked.

‘No, I’m sorry he’s out at the moment. Can I take a message?’ 

Jesse smiled deviously, pushing his luck. ‘Any idea what time he’ll be back?’

‘Probably not for a while’ came the response. ‘May I ask who’s calling?’

‘I’m… I’m an old friend of his from school’ Jesse said, off the cuff. ‘It’s fine, I’ll call back later.’

He hung up and smiled, self-satisfied. Looks like he was in luck.

WCWCWC

‘Ouch!’ Cameron complained as he winced. ‘That’s too tight.’

Neal looked up at him and kept working, ignoring the whining.

Cameron frowned. ‘Is this thing really necessary?’

‘YES!’ both Peter and Neal replied emphatically. 

They stared at each other and returned to the task of fitting the kevlar vest securely around Cameron’s trim waist. They adjusted the velcro strips as Cam fidgeted, none too happy with what he deemed was an unnecessary precaution - and humiliating at that.

‘You’ll wear it and you’ll like it’ Neal said, his voice uncharacteristically stern as he kept working. ‘Otherwise, we’re calling the whole thing off.’

‘How come Mozzie doesn't have to wear one?’ Cam said, sounding like a petulant three-year-old.

‘Because Mozzie —’ Neal stopped suddenly and looked up at his future son-in-law with a frown. He wasn't getting pulled into an argument, not now.

‘Fine’ the young man muttered under his breath.

Mozzie continued pacing, nerves getting the better of him. It wasn't his first rodeo by any means but knowing the Feds would be descending on them had him feeling particularly antsy. Unlike Neal, who’d been undercover countless times and actually looked forward to the moment the troops finally showed up, Mozzie had a tendency to develop a rash every time he was within ten feet of law enforcement types - Peter being the notable exception.

Peter had done his best to reassure him that he wasn't the target and that Jones was well aware of his role in helping out with the sting. There was no need to worry about the ‘man’ getting his claws in him; there was no way Mozzie would be on the hook for any of what was about to transpire.

Neal and Peter finished fitting the vest and Cameron proceeded to slip back into his shirt as they all settled around the table in Mozzie’s Brooklyn safe house. The foursome hovered over an intricate map - compliments of Mozzie and his paranoia fuelled obsessiveness for details.

‘All right’ Neal said as Cam took a seat and groaned in discomfort at the tightness around his chest. 

‘Peter and I will be inside the warehouse over in this area’ Neal explained, pointing to the map laid out before them.

He looked directly at Cameron. ‘You won’t see us but we’ll be there’ he added, doing his best to sound reassuring.

Peter spoke up. ‘We’ll call it in when the two of you have gotten him to come inside…just in case we spook him and he runs. Don’t want to be calling in the Feds for a false alarm.’ 

Cameron piped up. ‘So how do we get him inside the warehouse?’

‘That’s Mozzie’s job’ Neal explained. You just follow his lead, okay? Now, Jesse suggested this spot, right outside in the alley. But it’ll be getting dark by then.’ 

He turned to look at Mozzie. ‘Your job is to get him inside, tell him Cameron wants to get a better look at the goods.’

Mozzie nodded silently.

‘What if he doesn't want to go in?’ Cameron asked, tugging on his shirt.

‘He’ll go in’ Mozzie said. ‘He’s not walking away without his money and if we insist on getting a better look at the brooch, he won’t be able to resist.’

‘Now’ Peter said, handing Cameron an envelope stuffed with cash. ‘Usually, the Bureau uses numbered bills for stings like these but Jesse is only going to get a passing glance at the stack of phoney bills. These will be good enough.’

Cameron took the envelope and stashed it in his jacket as Peter continued with the explanations. ‘Do not, I repeat do not hand over the envelope and let him get a good look at these. I doubt he’d be able to tell the difference but I don’t want anything to go wrong. Just flash him the money, let him see it and put it back in your pocket while you pretend to examine the piece. That’ll give Jones and his men time to get there.’

‘Here’ Neal said, producing a loupe from his pocket. ‘When he hands over the cameo, pretend you’re examining it… like this.’ 

He mimicked the gesture - as if there was any doubt as to how a loupe was meant to be used.

Cameron chuckled nervously. ‘And here I thought it went in my ear’ he said deadpan, trying to make light of the situation.

Neal could tell he was a pack of nerves by the way he was fidgeting on his chair, constantly tugging at his shirt and running his hand through his hair. So many things could go wrong with this plan - starting with the fact that Jesse would likely be armed. If he felt he was being baited, he could react by pulling out his piece or making a run for it before he was arrested. He shook off the negativity; hopefully, this would all go as planned: they’d recover Sara’s cameo, Jesse Davis would land behind bars and Cameron would get the revenge he so badly wanted. If not… well, it was a little too late to start thinking about that now.

‘Cam’ he said as the younger man looked at him, eyes wide. ‘You’re supposed to be some young spoiled kid, you need to be arrogant.’

‘I can do arrogant’ Cam replied decisively. ‘Now give me that damn thing. Now!’

Neal shook his head in disbelief and let out a nervous giggle at Cameron’s attempt at humour.

‘When do I… have that little chat with him?’ Cameron asked, his voice tentative.

‘Not until we’ve disarmed him. Peter and I will come out and confront him. He won’t be expecting that and that way we can neutralize him until Jones arrives. He said he needed seven to eight minutes to get to the warehouse.’

Cameron nodded and let out a long, audible sigh.

Neal and Peter exchanged worried glances. It was a slam dunk, certainly no worse than the countless other operations they’d successfully carried out. 

What could possibly go wrong?

WCWCWC

Hope had finally begun to relax over the past few days. Her grandmother’s passing had been uppermost on her mind, taking the focus away from the unfortunate incident that had taken place in her bedroom back in White Plains. 

To be honest, she was relieved not to have gone ahead with the surgery; now, she wasn't sure she really wanted to go through with it at all. Cameron had repeatedly reminded her it made absolutely no difference to him; he’d even worked hard to convince her that she looked really hot with her half-hooded eyes, especially when she paired her eye flutter with a flirty smile. 

Despite feeling less skittish, she was glad not to be spending the evening alone. Cam had gone out for a beer with the guys and she’d invited Olivia over for dessert and coffee. Olivia was always a welcome distraction and Hope was looking forward to relaxing and taking a break from the drama of the last couple of weeks.

She made her way to the galley kitchen and got busy putting on a pot of decaf. She’d brought home one of her more recent paintings from the gallery and was planning to give it to Olivia as a thank you gift for all her support in helping her prepare for the wedding. With her grandmother’s passing, thinking about her upcoming nuptials was the last thing on her mind but within the next few weeks, she knew she would need to buckle down and get serious if she wanted to be ready in time for the big day. Her grandma would have wanted it that way.

One day at a time she reminded herself as a soft knock came on the apartment door. She checked her watch and smiled.

‘Oh my God’ she called out through the closed door. ‘I can’t believe you’re actually here on time.’

She opened the door with a flourish and stood there, awestruck, her mouth hanging open as her eyes rested on Jesse Davis standing there with a goofy smile on his face.

‘Hi pretty girl’ he said with a devious smile. ‘Remember me?’ 

WCWCWC

Sara sat in their family room with only Raffie for company. Caitlin was working a shift at the coffee shop and Neal was out on his delicate sting operation. She and Neal had agreed to keep the plan from both Caitlin and Hope - at least for the time being. It would do no good for either one of them to know that Neal and Cam were going after Jesse. Once it was all over and Jesse was behind bars, they would sit Caitlin down and tell her what had happened. She would no doubt be upset about having been kept out of the loop but she’d get over it and life would finally return to normal. As far as Hope was concerned… well, Sara didn't want to get involved - that was between her and Cam.

Sara was looking forward to returning the brooch to Randall Piper and having the whole sordid mess behind them once and for all. Neal had been right all along; it was ridiculous of her to have accepted such an extravagant gift from a man who was basically a client. That damn thing had brought nothing but bad luck into their home. It had caused unnecessary stress in their marriage and had come between a brother and sister.

As if on cue, the phone rang in the quiet house, the screen reading ‘unknown’ - always a hit and miss proposition. It could be the Sally Ann looking for donations… or it could have something to do with the operation that was going down. Better not to take any chances.

‘Hello?’ she said, holding her breath.

‘Sara’ the deep male voice said. ‘It’s Randy.’

She let out the breath she’d been holding and smiled at the sound of the familiar voice.

‘Randy… hi! How did you get my home number?’ she asked.

‘I pried it out of Lydia Jordan’ he admitted sheepishly. ‘She told me… about your mother-in-law passing away. I wanted to offer my condolences personally.’

Sara sighed and took a seat on the couch in the family room. Raffie grumbled and set his head back down on her lap. ‘Thank you… that’s really kind of you.’

‘I understand the funeral is Wednesday. If it’s all right with you… I’d like to attend.’

‘That’s… awfully sweet of you Randy’ she said, not sure what else she could say.

She tried to imagine Neal’s reaction to having the man who inspired envy and jealousy at his mom’s funeral. ‘But it’s really not necessary.’

‘I… I always felt bad I wasn't there for you when your folks passed away’ he said, his voice quiet. ‘The least I can do is pay my respects to your mother-in-law.’

There was an awkward silence on the line and Sara felt the need to say something. 

‘I…I hope Lydia’s been taking good care of you while I was away. I actually went into the office for a couple of hours today to catch up on some paper work… I’m sorry I haven't had time to start working on your Hampton place yet.’

‘No harm done’ he said. She could hear the smile in his voice. 

‘I hope to get to it later this week… after the funeral.’

‘No rush’ he said kindly. ‘Look, I won’t keep you… again, I’m sorry for your loss.’

‘Thanks, thanks a lot for calling Randy’ Sara replied before hanging up.

She couldn't quite figure out why but it seemed her heart was beating a little faster.

WCWCWC

By the time Hope realized what was happening, Jesse Davis had pushed his way into the apartment and had managed to cover her mouth with his hand to keep her from screaming.

‘This is just a friendly little visit’ he whispered lewdly into her ear. ‘Keep your mouth shut and everything will be all right.’

Hope’s eyes grew in horror. She struggled to catch her breath. Suddenly there was something hard and cold against her cheek and she realized he was holding a gun to her face.

She let out a gasp and Jesse’s hold tightened around her mouth. ‘Now, are you going to be a good girl or are you going to make this hard on me?’

TBC


	61. Chapter 61

‘Here, take this’ Neal said, handing Mozzie a minuscule earbud. ‘We’ll let you know our exact position once we’re inside the warehouse.’

Mozzie took the tiny listening device and expertly slipped it into his ear.

‘What about me?’ Cam asked, apparently slighted. ‘Don’t I get one?’

Neal glared at him. He'd created a monster. Cam looked away chastened; message received.

‘Now, everybody’ Peter said. ‘Phone ringers off. We don’t want anything spooking this guy.’

Neal’s eyes moved nervously from Mozzie, back to Cameron. ‘You know, it’s not too late to change your mind Cam. We can do this without you.’

Cameron gave his future father-in-law a stern glare. ‘No! I’m doing this!’ he declared, his tone unusually brusque. 

He looked like a broncin' buck in his enclosure, bursting to get out. As Neal knew all too well, some degree of nervous energy just before a job was a good thing. The adrenaline flowing through your blood, it kept you sharp - as long as it didn't overwhelm you and keep you from performing at your best. Cam was way past that point, he looked like he was about to jump out of his skin. If he was turned loose on Jesse in this state, it was guaranteed to be a disaster. 

Neal exchanged knowing looks with Mozzie and Peter and the two of them stepped away, sensing that Neal wanted to have a private word with Cam.

‘Look, I know how you’re feeling Cam’ Neal said patiently, bringing his hand to rest on Cameron’s shoulder. 

Cam gave him a look of fury Neal had never before seen in the young man’s eyes. ‘I. Am. Fine’ he repeated harshly. 

Neal’s blood pressure started to rise, his cheeks growing a deep shade of pink. ‘You are NOT fine!’ he said a little too loudly. ‘You look like someone who’s been eating babies for dinner.’ 

His words hit Cam smack in the gut and he let out a couple of halting breaths. 

‘I can’t let you loose on Jesse when you’re in this state.’

Cam took another couple of shaky breaths. Neal forced him to sit, bringing the two men face to face. 

‘I know how you feel Cam. I know how angry you are. I’m angry too.’

‘You don’t understand Mr. Caffrey. Hope’s been a wreck since all this happened. She’s always looking over her shoulder, wondering if he’s going to make good on his threat. She’s too scared to stay on her own… I’ve never known her to be afraid of anything. And worse, she’s trying to pretend she’s not scared out of her mind so I won’t worry about her.’

‘First of all, if you lose control and seriously hurt Jesse, you could get yourself arrested and what do you think that would do to Hope?’

At those words, Cam seemed to start paying attention. Neal sighed loudly. He could certainly relate to the anger that was oozing out of every pore of the young man’s body. He remembered all too well those first few weeks after the attack on Sara, how helpless he’d felt that he couldn't fix things, make everything better for her. 

‘After Sara was kidnapped…’ he confided. ‘I felt just like you’re feeling right now. I was so… so damn mad, so frustrated. I wanted to kill the guy who’d…’

He glanced in Peter’s direction. He had a feeling both he and Mozzie were listening in on their conversation.

He lowered his voice. ‘I even tried to convince Peter to get me in to see him in prison so I could beat the shit out of him’ he said with a sad chuckle. ‘Me… beat the shit out of someone. But you and me… we’re smarter than that Cam. And we’ve got the law on our side.’

Cameron’s body language was changing before his eyes. It appeared Neal was finally getting through to him. 

‘Look, I know you love Hope, I do too but we’re not neanderthals. We can be there for her but she’s one of the strongest women you and I are ever likely to meet and if you stand by her, she’ll get through this… just like Sara did.’

Cam’s eyes focussed on Neal’s voice, his face growing calmer.

‘Attacking Jesse is just going to make things worse. Do you understand that?’

Cam nodded, seemingly reverting to his gentle self. 

‘Now, if you want to get in his face, tell him what you think of him, of what he did to Hope… that’s fair game and it might make you feel better. But you CANNOT lose control. Do you hear me?’

Cameron swallowed and looked into Neal’s eyes. ‘Yeah…yeah. I understand.’

It was Neal’s turn to let out a long slow breath. ‘Now, do I need to pull you out or are you going to reel it in?’

Cam actually took a moment to reflect - definitely a good sign. 

‘I’m okay’ he said, his voice quiet.

‘We’ll be watching you the whole time’ Neal said reassuringly. ‘And Mozzie will be with you.’

For a brief moment, Neal cursed the fact that Jesse knew who he was; he would have much preferred to be the one going in with Cam so he could keep an eye on him and keep things from getting out of control.

Peter took a few steps towards them, pointing to his watch. ‘Neal…’

Neal gave Cam one last pat on the back and got to his feet. 

‘All right’ he said. ‘Peter and I will get a head start, make sure we can set up inside the warehouse before he shows up.’

He turned to Mozzie. ‘Moz, keep him waiting a few minutes but not too long and…’

‘I know the drill Neal’ he replied, cutting him off. ‘We’ll be careful. Now go.’

With one last glance, Neal and Peter stepped out into the cool night air.

WCWCWC

‘Now, are you going to keep your pretty little mouth shut?’ Jesse repeated in Hope’s ear.

The gun was still pressed up against her cheek and she could feel his hot putrid breath against her skin. She was fighting to catch her breath, her mind having difficulty focussing. Right now, more than anything, she needed to breathe, something that was growing near impossible with his rough hand covering her mouth and nose. She nodded as he slowly removed his hand, leaving the gun pressed up against the side of her face.

‘That’s better’ he said with a devilish smile.

He pulled the gun away, reaching down and taking her hand in his as if they were lovers out for a stroll in the park. He began walking around the small apartment, pulling her along with him. 

‘I’m just here to pay you a friendly little visit, that’s all’ he murmured. ‘Why don’t you show me around your little love nest?’

She froze at the sound of his voice, recognizing it from the earlier phone call. How could she have left her guard down? How could she have been so careless? She panted, trying to catch her breath. Jesse moved his hand up to caress her cheek, brushing away her thick mane of curls.

‘You’re just as pretty as I remember from that day I met you at your parents’ place’ he said softly. ‘Such pretty blue eyes. Look at me.’

She averted his gaze but Jesse would not be denied. ‘Look at me’ he repeated, his voice growing angry.

‘That’s better’ he cooed when she relented. He ran his hand languidly over her cheek, pushing aside her wavy dark hair and proceeded to place a kiss on her cheek as she cringed.

‘So, your boyfriend’s going to be out for a while, huh? That’s good. You and I can get to know each other a little better.’

Hope’s mind was reeling, her body shaking. She forced herself to focus and weigh her options. Could she safely get away from him, reach the door and make a run for it? Not likely. No one could outrun a bullet. She could scream but she’d be taking a chance that he might use that gun to silence her. Maybe she could try reasoning with him, talk him into leaving her alone, remind him of the consequences of his actions. 

She turned and glanced at the clock on the DVD player. It was past six o’clock; Olivia would be there any minute. If she could just stay calm until she got there, maybe there’d be an opportunity to get herself out of this mess. 

Her thoughts were interrupted by Jesse, pulling her towards the living room couch. She fell inelegantly next to him as he pulled her in with one arm, the gun still firmly gripped in his other hand. 

‘You know Caitlin kept going on and on and on about you Caffreys. What a wonderful family you are, how kind and generous you all are. But she left out how pretty you look when you’re scared.’

‘Please…’ Hope whimpered. ‘I know you don’t want to hurt me.’

‘You’re right. I’m a lover not a fighter’ he said crudely. He let his hand linger down her cheek along her neck and down to her chest, grazing her breast as she gasped.

‘Oh you like that, do you?’ he murmured lewdly.

She could see his grip loosening on the gun but he continued to hold on to it, unwilling to let it go. He brought his lips to her ear and licked her earlobe as she tried to pull away.

‘Do you remember what I wrote in that little note I left for you? Huh? Do you?’

She turned away, unwilling to look at him. ‘I’ve got a friend coming over. She’ll be here any minute.’

‘Aww sweetheart, you don’t think I’m going to fall for that old trick, do you?’

‘It’s true, she’ll be here any minute.’

Jesse laughed sardonically. ‘Well then, we can have ourselves a little threesome —’

He’d barely spoken the words when there was a soft knock at the door. Hope felt his grip tightening on her.

‘Who is that?’ he whispered.

‘I told you it’s my best friend’ Hope said, her voice shaky.

‘Damn it’ he said, growing agitated and getting to his feet. 

Finally free from his grasp, Hope stood and studied his face. The last thing she wanted was to drag Olivia into this mess. Jesse’s demeanour changed, his movements growing hesitant, more tentative. He reached behind, slipping the gun into the back of his pants.

He grabbed her arm, forcing her to look at him. ‘When you open the door, you’re going to tell your friend that I’m an old buddy of Cam’s and that I just dropped in to say hi. Then I’m going to leave and you’re going to let me. Do you hear me? No calling the police and no telling your boyfriend.’

She nodded, snivelling as a second knock was heard.

‘Now, wipe your face and go get the door.’

Hope felt all the air rushing out of her lungs and on shaky legs, she reached the door, opening it and, with great relief, spied Olivia Mason standing there.

‘It’s about time —’ Olivia began, glancing over Hope’s shoulder and noticing the young man standing there. ‘Oh hello!’

He gave her a blistering smile and her eyes were momentarily drawn to him and away from the look of horror on Hope’s face. 

‘You must be the friend Hope was telling me about’ he said, extending his hand. ‘I’m a friend of Cameron’s, I just popped in to say hi.’

Olivia nodded and glanced at Hope who gave her a forced smile. Just let him leave and don't say anything Hope pleaded silently.

‘Oh yeah?’ Olivia said, stepping into the apartment. ‘Did you two go to university together?’

She had met most of Cam’s friends over the years and she didn't recognize this guy.

Jesse didn't respond and started moving towards the door. Whereas a moment ago, he seemed to be settling in for the long run, now, it seemed like he couldn't get out of there fast enough.

‘Well, see you later Hope. Let Cam know I dropped by. You and I can finish catching up another time.’

She nodded silently and watched as he stepped through the open door and out into the hallway. As soon as he’d stepped out, she ran to the door, closing it and turning the lock. She turned to look at Olivia and that’s when Olivia saw it. The look of absolute terror on her best friend’s face.

‘What? What is it?’

‘Oh Liv, I’ve never been so happy to see you in my life’ Hope said as she threw herself in her arms.

WCWCWC

Liam was in the middle of re-reading the same chapter for a third time when his phone buzzed beside him on the bed. His eyes lit up at the sight of Cody’s face on the screen.

‘Hey’ he said breathlessly into the phone.

‘You sound out of breath. You out running or something?’ Cody said, only half serious.

Liam was quick with the retort. ‘No… it’s the sight of your face on my phone. It does it to me every time.’

Cody replied with a chuckle. ‘How are you doing?’

‘I’m… trying to get through this chapter on supply and demand for my class tomorrow but I’m having trouble concentrating.’

‘Sorry to interrupt’ Cody said, not sounding sorry in the least.

Liam threw the book aside without a second thought. ‘Are you kidding? I could use the distraction.’

‘You feeling better… since the weekend?’

Liam’s first call when he’d returned to his dorm room following the massacre in Pittsburgh had been to Cody. Strong, reliable Cody.

‘Awww, what can I do? It’s too late now. All I can do is try to get back in the coaches’ good graces.’

‘Just try to relax babe. It’ll be fine.’

Liam chuckled.

‘What?’

‘Nothing, it’s just… you calling me babe. I never realized how much I missed it.’

‘Well, I’ll call you babe all day long if it makes you feel better. How are you doing with the eulogy? Any progress?’

‘Some. Josh has been a big help.’

‘That’s good. So when are you getting back?’

‘I’m flying out first thing Wednesday morning. The funeral is at two o’clock.’

‘I can pick you up at the airport’ Cody volunteered. ‘White Plains?’ 

‘Hey, wait a minute. Don’t you have a class on Wednesday mornings?’

‘I’m not going. I already told my professor that… there’d been a death in the family.’

‘In the family, huh?’ Liam said. ‘I guess you just didn't specify which family.’

‘Look, I’ve got a perfect attendance record so far this year. You wouldn't want me to get a reputation as a geek, would you?’

Liam laughed out loud. It felt good. Things were always better when Cody was there to share the load. It had been like that for years up until their breakup. Lately he’d forgotten just how comforting it was to have Cody Miller in his corner, weird sense of humour and all.

‘Well, you’re a pretty hot geek’ he said. What he really wanted to say was ‘you’re my geek’ but he held back. Baby steps.

‘So… do you want to run your speech by me? Would that help?’

Liam took the few steps to his desk and pulled out a sheet of paper. ‘Yeah, that would help a lot.’

‘All right. Let’s hear it.’ 

WCWCWC

Neal and Peter waited in silence behind a partition in the abandoned warehouse. The place reeked of mould and a variety of other offensive odours they'd rather not think about. Except for the intermittent sound of vermin scurrying for cover, the place was quiet. 

‘Not much fun, is it?’ Peter whispered to Neal, his quiet voice resonating in the empty shell of a building.

Neal looked over at his ex-handler, puzzled.

‘Having to sit on the sidelines and hope for the best’ Peter clarified. ‘Now you know how I felt all those times I sent you undercover and listened from the van, hoping things didn't go totally FUBAR.’

Neal let out a nervous chuckle. ‘Is this how it felt? The truth is I’m having trouble keeping my dinner down.’

Peter nodded. ‘Believe me, I get it. You feel responsible for what’s about to happen but it’s no longer in your hands.’

Neal sighed loudly. ‘Hope will never forgive me if something goes wrong.’

Now it was Peter’s turn to reassure his partner. ‘Nothing’s going to go wrong. We’re going to get Sara’s little trinket back, Jones and his men will arrest Jesse and Cam will feel vindicated for what the creep did to Hope.’

Neal nodded and exhaled. Hopefully, it would be that simple.

Peter brought his hand to rest on Neal’s back, feeling the tension. He gave it a quick reassuring pat. Neal’s body felt like an elastic band, stretched to its limit and ready to snap at any minute. 

‘You sure you’re okay, buddy?’ Peter asked. 

‘Yeah, I’m fine. I just want this to be over.’

Even though his stomach was doing flip flops, Neal was feeling strangely energized. It was impossible to completely silence his overactive mind when it came to the events of the last couple of days but this little adventure had helped quiet the constant thoughts of his mom. At least temporarily. And they were finally going to get Jesse off the street and away from Caitlin once and for all. The man was nothing but trouble and no good could come of him hanging around his kid sister - not unless he had a come to Jesus moment, something Neal highly doubted. 

He turned to look in Peter and smiled naughtily. ‘So this is really what it was like when you sent me undercover?’

‘Every. Single. Time.’

Neal let out a small choked laugh. ‘Sorry about that’ he said with a shrug. ‘I guess I didn't always make things easy for you.’

Peter’s eyes grew. ‘You think?’ he said sarcastically. ‘All those times you went off script. Drove me nuts.’

There was silence for a moment. Neal shivered in the damp space. 

‘You know I heard what you said to Cam’ Peter said. ‘You did a great job calming him down.’

‘I learned from the best’ Neal said with a grin.

Peter chuckled and shook his head. ‘Just like old times, huh partner?’  
They were both getting a little long in the tooth for such craziness but somehow, it was nice to be working together to put away a criminal, especially someone who had caused the Caffrey family so much heartache. 

They were interrupted by Mozzie’s voice, coming through their earpieces. 

‘We’re coming down the block towards you’ he said. ‘I can see our guy up ahead. He’s standing right outside the warehouse.’

‘How does he look?’

‘Like he’s walking to the gallows. He’s fidgeting and pacing back and forth.’

‘Good’ Neal said. ‘He’s nervous. That’s how we want him.’

‘You and the suit all set?’

‘Yup’ Neal replied. ‘When you come in the back door of the warehouse, you’ll see a half wall on your right. It’s made of plywood and there are two large garbage bins in front of it. We’re right behind there.’

As a second thought, he added. ‘How’s Cam doing?’

‘A little less Terminator, a little more Rocky Balboa’ Mozzie murmured.

‘Oh, and when you come in’ Peter added, joining the conversation. ‘Watch out for the rats, they’re sounding particularly frisky.’ 

Neal and Peter exchanged amused glances, imagining the look on the little guy’s face. 

‘It’s show time’ they both heard Mozzie say.

WCWCWC

The two women clung together, both of them shaking. They didn't dare move until the receding sound of Jesse’s footsteps were long gone. Olivia held Hope against her, running her hand through her hair as Hope sobbed and gave her chapter and verse about the close call she’d just had.

When Hope finally pulled away, tears were still running down her cheeks. She looked up at her best friend, her breathing uneven.

‘Liv, can you take me home?’

WCWCWC

Cameron could feel his heart thumping wildly in his chest as he and Mozzie closed in on their destination. In all of his twenty-seven years, it had never occurred to him to use his physical size to make a point. At six foot four, he cut an imposing figure but he’d always been on the lanky side, more of a gentle giant than anything else. The thought of physically attacking someone was as foreign to him as a butterfly beating up on a bear. But the anger he’d felt since Hope had been threatened wouldn't let go of him. 

Rationally, he knew all too well that slamming his fist squarely into Jesse Davis’ face wouldn't make Hope any less scared but there was something deep inside that was pushing him to confront this guy and give him his comeuppance for the cruelty of his actions. Somehow, knowing he was locked up just wouldn't be good enough. He recalled the last couple of weeks, how Hope had been a nervous wreck, how she’d been particularly clingy, asking him when he was coming home, making plans so she wouldn’t have to be alone, sleeping with the lights on or not sleeping at all.

She had been through more than enough crap to last her a lifetime and although he couldn't turn back the clock and change the events of the fateful night of her accident, he sure as hell could make sure she was safe from now on. She’d scoff if she could hear his musings and a small smile appeared on his lips at the thought. Hope Ellis-Caffrey was no wallflower, no damsel in distress. But she was the woman he loved, the woman he would be pledging his life to in another few weeks and they owed it to one another to have each other’s backs for the rest of their days. 

‘You okay kid?’ came Mozzie’s voice as they ambled down the block, their target in view.

‘Yeah, I’m fine.’

‘Keep breathing.’

‘He looks smaller than I thought he'd be’ Cam commented, his confidence growing.

He ran his hand down the smooth leather of the jacket Mozzie had dug up for him. Why Mozzie would have a stylish leather jacket in his size hanging in his closet, Cam had no idea but he was beyond asking. He was finding out there were plenty of things about Hope’s uncle Mozzie he was better not knowing.

‘You look like an Ivy league guy in that jacket, very trendy. That tie is a good match… Just don’t talk too much, all right?’

Cam nodded and kept walking, slowing his pace to keep up with Mozzie’s shorter stride. He felt his phone vibrating in his pocket and made a move to pull it out.

‘What are you doing?’ Mozzie asked with a surly look on his face. ‘Put that thing away! Now get your head in the game.’

Within seconds they arrived on the street corner, watching in silence as Jesse led the way to the back of the building where there was a streetlight nearby.

‘You’re late!’ he declared as he looked up at the two men. ‘So this is your guy with a fascination for women’s jewelry?’

He looked Cam up and down, a look of arrogance in his eyes. ‘Look, let’s just get this over with. You got the money?’

Mozzie gave him a look of annoyance. ‘Slow down there Flash. You don’t do this kind of thing very often, do you?’

Cameron stood there, hovering over the creep, taking long, slow breaths to keep himself in check. Now that he was within striking distance, it was getting more difficult to rein in his impulses.

‘My client wants to see the merchandise first.’

‘How do I know you have the money?’

Mozzie gave a head nod in Cam’s direction. That was his cue to pull out the stack of bills in the envelope Peter had given him earlier. His hands steady, Cam reached into his pocket and flashed the phoney bills. They could practically see Jesse salivating at the sight of it.

‘Fine’ he said, pulling a wad of tissue out of his pocket, revealing the cameo hidden inside. 

‘Nice to know you’re treating such an expensive piece of jewelry with the respect it deserves’ Cameron said in just the right condescending tone.

Jesse ignored the smart ass comment. ‘I’ve had it appraised. It’s worth double what you’re giving me.’ 

‘I’m sure you’ll understand if I don’t take your word for it’ Cameron replied. 

Jesse handed over the tiny object and watched as Cam struggled to examine it in the dimly lit alleyway. He squinted and after a moment, shook his head. ‘It’s too dark out here, I can’t see a thing.’

‘We could go into that bar out front’ Mozzie suggested innocently. 

‘Are you fucking kidding me?’ Jesse said, looking more and more nervous. ‘We’re not doing this out in the open.’

Mozzie and Cam looked at each other and shrugged, pretending to weigh their options.

‘Hold on a minute’ Mozzie said as he walked the few steps towards the back door of the large vacant building.

He gave the heavy metal door a tug and feigned surprise when it opened. Thank God for Neal’s sharp skills with a lock pick set.

‘We’re in luck’ he said as he pulled the door open for the other two men to walk through.

The men looked around; the place was abandoned but there were lights on - not what one might describe as brightly lit but a little more light than in the alley. The foul smelling odours hit them all at the same time and Jesse covered his nose in reaction.

‘Let’s make this quick’ he said.

Cam resumed his study of the cameo, expertly pulling out the loupe from his coat pocket as if he'd done this kind of thing a thousand times before. He could feel his phone vibrating in his pocket again. He did his best to ignore it. 

‘Come on, come on’ Jesse said, fidgeting.

‘Cool it buddy’ Mozzie said. ‘The guy needs to make sure you didn't get that thing out of a Cracker Jack box.’

Cameron gave Jesse a deathly stare and the man backed off, nervously glancing around the space. The phone vibrated once more in Cam’s leather jacket, distracting him. Somebody was awfully insistent about trying to reach him.

In the distance they heard some rustling and Jesse reached behind, instantly pulling a gun out of nowhere and taking a stance, ready to shoot - although at what he didn't know.

‘What the hell!’ Mozzie said. ‘Put that goddamn thing away. It’s just rats.’

Jesse momentarily returned his attention to the transaction, his gun still firmly in his grasp. 

Cam did his best to concentrate, turning the object over in his hands, examining the underside. He wasn't sure how much longer he had before the Feds showed up and he needed to keep the guy from slipping away before he could administer his little payback. 

‘The money’ Jesse repeated, waving the firearm around indiscriminately.

Something was changing in Cam’s eyes that was making Mozzie nervous. He tried to deescalate the tension which had grown since Jesse had pulled out the gun.

‘Look, will you stop waving that thing around’ Mozzie said to Jesse. ‘The guy’s not about to hand over twenty big ones without making sure he's got the goods.’

Again, the phone vibrated in Cam’s pocket and this time, he was unable to resist. Something had to be wrong.

‘I’ve got to take this. It could be my broker’ he attempted, trying to sound glib but not managing it in the least. 

He pulled out the phone and glanced at the screen, There were five texts from Hope. 

‘Come home. Jesse was here.’

The sound of the phone clattering on the cement floor was followed by the ping of the brooch hitting the ground and in the blink of an eye, Cam moved in on Jesse like a dog in heat, throwing him up against the wall with a loud thud.

‘Why you son of a bitch!’ he cried out as he brought his arm up against Jesse’s throat, trapping him against the cement wall. 

Mozzie looked on with wide eyes. What the hell had just happened? 

There was groaning and moaning as Jesse tried to fight off his assailant who had totally lost it. Cameron was moving in ways he never knew he could, his fists pounding repeatedly in Jesse’s gut then moving to his face to throw a couple of well placed blows.

‘You fucking animal… what did you do to her?’ Cam was screaming as he continued to pummel the other man.

Jesse was totally taken by surprise but managed to keep his grip on his gun although his body was being bounced around like a basketball on a gym floor. 

‘What?’ he groaned, trying to figure out what the hell was going on.

His finger twitched on the grip of his handgun as he fought to hold on to it. 

‘You’re crazy man’ he managed to utter as Cameron landed a good solid punch on the side of his face.

Blood immediately began to trickle down the side of his cheek.

Then, everything seemed to happen at once. 

Peter and Neal emerged from their hiding place and shouted at Cam to stand down, Mozzie stepped away from the gun still pressed in Jesse’s palm, Neal placed his arms around Cameron’s shoulders in an effort to pull him off the thief and the door to the warehouse flew open, revealing a trio of newcomers. 

Jones’ familiar voice was heard shouting over the craziness, resonating in the cavernous space. ‘FBI! Freeze!’

And then, a gunshot rang out, it’s echo stunning everyone in the room. 

TBC


	62. Chapter 62

'Still no answer' Hope said from the passenger's side of the car. 'Why isn't he picking up?’

'Bars are noisy' Olivia reminded her. 'Maybe he can't hear his phone.’

Hope was shivering despite the fact Olivia had cranked up the heat so high she was sweating bullets in her goose down coat. She was beginning to wonder if she should have her best friend checked out before taking her home. Although she was no longer crying, Hope had reverted to staring off into space and shaking uncontrollably. Olivia had been able to ascertain that her best friend hadn't suffered any physical injuries but as far as her emotional state was concerned… well, the jury was still out.

'Do you want me to call your mom for you? Let her know we're on our way.’

Silence.

‘Hope?'

Hope seemed to snap out of her reverie. ‘What?'

'Do you want to call your mom and let her know you're coming home?’

Hope stared ahead, seemingly in a trance. She shook her head silently.

Olivia Mason had been Hope's best friend since they were toddlers. Their parents loved to tell the story of how they'd befriended each other at the local playground, a few blocks from where the two families lived over on Meadowbrook Street in the Prospect Park neighbourhood of White Plains. Twenty odd years later, their friendship was still thriving and they'd seen each other through the inevitable ups and downs of life through childhood, puberty, adolescence and now, adulthood.

They'd spent countless hours together as kids, riding their bikes around the neighbourhood, competing on the same soccer team, having sleepovers at each other's homes, sitting next to each other in class - Olivia helping Hope with math and Hope coaching her best friend in English. They'd argued more times than you could shake a stick at - hell, wasn't that what best friend did? - but they always managed to make up, sometimes with a little help from their parents.

Olivia had spent countless weekends at the Caffrey house where Hope's dad would make them grilled cheese sandwiches with tomato soup while they giggled and shared endless secrets with each other. Neal would joke that if he wanted to know what was on Hope's mind, all he had to do was have her invite Olivia over and pretend to work in the kitchen while the girls poured their hearts out to each other in the nearby family room. Through thick and thin, their friendship had endured, a solid, long lasting relationship that was no doubt destined to last their whole lives through.

Olivia had been there for Hope in the months following her accident, visiting her in the hospital almost daily, keeping her in the loop as to the goings-on with their mutual friends, helping her with her physical therapy and trying to keep her spirits up as she healed from her multiple injuries. Conversely, Hope had comforted Olivia through a series of break-ups and had even played matchmaker for her on occasion. When her parents had separated for a few months back in high school, the person Olivia had turned to for encouragement and support was Hope and her best friend had been there for her, acting as a sounding board and trying her best to be supportive.  
Now, looking at the young woman to her right, Olivia barely recognized her. The usually upbeat Hope sat there in a trance, her face pale, her hands trembling. Hope had confided in her about the young man who'd appeared on the Caffreys' doorstep shortly after the holidays, how he'd flirted with her the first time she'd met him and how she'd been flattered by the unexpected attention. 'He's like a modern day James Dean' Hope had told her best friend at the time, 'cute but a little dangerous'. At the time, Hope had never imagined Caitlin's brother could have a violent streak nor could she possibly have foreseen he would turn into a stalker.

'Hope?' Olivia repeated, worry apparent in her voice.

'What?' came the shaky response.

Olivia's hand reached over and patted her best friend's arm. 'It's going to be okay.’

WCWCWC

The deafening sound of the gunshot reverberated in the cavernous warehouse, bringing everything to a sudden standstill. Jesse's eyes grew in shock as he realized the gun he'd been holding had gone off accidentally. He backed away, letting it fall noisily to the floor, joining Cameron's phone and the cameo brooch which had rolled off into some dark corner of the room. Jones and one of the other agents were instantly on him, forcing his arms behind his back in an effort to restrain him.

Meanwhile Neal had an armful of Cameron Armstrong to contend with. A mere seconds before, he'd been trying to pry the young man off Jesse when he'd felt the impact of the bullet hitting Cam, sending them staggering back with force, both men landing with a loud thud on the cement floor. Neal lay, momentarily trapped under Cam's impressive frame. From his position on the floor, he could see Peter and Mozzie hovering over them, watching the scene unfold as if in slow motion. He felt the crushing weight of Cameron's body on his and fought for a breath, reacting instinctively by pushing the younger man off of him so he could resume breathing.

Suddenly, everyone was gathered around Cameron, watching in horror as he brought his hands to his chest, grimacing and trying unsuccessfully to catch his breath.

Peter was the first to react, kneeling beside him. 'Take a breath Cam, take a breath' he urged.

He rushed to open Cam's jacket and shirt in an attempt to ascertain where the bullet had lodged itself. Cameron stared back, his eyes wide, not quite sure what was going on. It seemed Neal had skipped the part about what to expect if he ever got shot while wearing the vest. He struggled with finding his breath, finally letting out a loud gasp as the needed air rushed to his lungs.

'It's okay' Peter shouted to the other two men as he spotted the bullet safely trapped in the middle of the vest. 'It's okay.’

'What the fuck is wrong with that guy?' Jesse was shouting as Jones slipped him into a pair of cuffs. 'Why did he attack me like that?’

Neal recuperated from his tumble and got his legs back, scrambling to his feet. He was instantly in Jesse's face, staring him down as blood dripped from a cut above the thief's left eye.

Cam was sitting up now, with Peter's help. He pointed to his phone which had rolled a few feet away. 'He… he… he attacked Hope' he managed to say as Neal frowned, trying to comprehend what the younger man had just said.  
'He… was at our apartment… tonight' Cam continued, still trying to catch his breath.

Jesse stared back, puzzled. What did the guy mean 'our apartment'? Who was this guy anyway?

Without hesitation, Neal turned to face him, anger flaring in his eyes.

'You've gone too far this time Jesse' he growled, his voice growing loud. He could feel the last shreds of self-control slipping away as he thought of his little girl at the mercy of this punk.

'What did you do Jesse? What did you do to Hope?' he shouted, spittle protruding from his lips.

The young man stared back defiantly as a devilish smile appeared on his lips.

Neal could feel blood pumping in his ears as he began to lose control. Despite his generally pacifist disposition, he found himself reacting without his usual restraint. He instinctively brought his knee up and pointed it in the direction of Jesse's groin, giving him a decisive blow and sending him falling back into Jones' waiting arms. Jesse's body collapsed, the wind knocked out of him.

He screamed in pain, squirming as he tried to collect himself.

Neal could see the stern look in Jones' eyes, urging him to stand down. He'd seen that look dozens of times before over the years. Despite an almost irresistible urge to pummel the sick bastard's face, Neal managed to heed the silent plea, stepping back and glaring at Jesse as he tried in vain to regain his composure and stand up straight.

'That was for Hope you son of a bitch… and for Cameron' he shouted angrily. 'Get him out of here Jones before I do something I'll regret.’

'You're the one who's going to regret this Caffrey' Jesse was screaming as he was led away in handcuffs out the backdoor of the warehouse.

Neal didn't even hear him. His hands were busy reaching for his phone.

WCWCWC

Sara glanced at her watch and wondered how the guys were doing with their little sting. Not that she was a novice at this sort of thing. She'd had years of witnessing Neal and Mozzie's clandestine machinations to say nothing of watching from the sidelines while Neal and Peter went undercover with Neal vulnerable more often than not. Despite her husband's reassurances that this little operation was a slam dunk, worry had begun to creep in from the moment he’d left the house to meet Mozzie at his safe house.

As he always did, Neal had downplayed the danger involved, assuring her that the Bureau was working with them on the case and would act as backup. Typical Neal, always trying to keep her from worrying - or perhaps it was his fear that if he said too much, she would lock him in the basement and not let him out of the house.

This time, however, things had the potential of being a lot more complicated. Cam's relentless pleading had finally worn Neal down and he'd relented, agreeing to let him play the supporting role of 'buyer number one', aka 'pissed off boyfriend of the damsel in distress'. Sara was having conniptions about their future son-in-law's rookie debut in what was a potentially dangerous takedown. Worse yet, at Cameron's insistence, Hope had been left in the dark, something Sara knew would come back to bite them in the ass when her headstrong daughter eventually found out what they'd all been up to.

Neal had been adamant that there was little risk involved even as Sara reminded him that Jesse Davis was walking around New York carrying a gun. He wouldn't be expecting an ambush, Neal had reassured her and besides, what could go wrong when the FBI was in the shadows, ready to pounce.

Not wanting to attract attention to the very real potential dangers of the op, Neal had refrained from telling his wife that Peter had secured a bullet proof vest for Cam. Better to keep that to himself and simply reassure her that they had everything covered - which in fact, he honestly thought they had.

Still, despite his reassurances, Sara was looking forward to having Neal home safe and sound, preferably with the news that Jesse had finally been arrested once and for all. Then, and only then, would they be able to bring Caitlin in the loop so she could start to heal. As much as Caitlin ranted about Jesse and his evil ways, he was still her brother and she would need her foster parents' love and support to adjust to the new reality of having him behind bars.

Less importantly and with any luck, Neal would be returning with the cameo in his hot little hands and she would finally be able to put the whole ugly episode with Randy Piper behind her and return that damn, cursed piece of jewelry to the multimillionaire where it belonged.

The front door opened as Sara checked the time once more. Too early for Caitlin to be home from work and Hope was over at Cam's for the night. She got to her feet and followed Raffie to the door, calling out as she went.

'Neal? Is that you?' she called out as she came face to face with Hope, Olivia by her side apparently holding her up.

'Honey, what are you —‘

She'd barely gotten the words out when Hope pulled herself out of Olivia's grasp and ran towards her, throwing herself into her arms with a loud, soulful moan.

'What happened? What is it?' Sara asked as Hope held on to her for dear life.

'That Jesse guy showed up at Cam's apartment' Olivia explained.

Sara's face grew dark. ‘What?'

How could that be when Jesse was supposed to rendezvous with the vigilantes to make the trade?

Hope pulled away momentarily and Sara looked into her tear streaked face. 'Did he hurt you, honey? Are you hurt?' she asked with a renewed sense of urgency.

Hope shook her head and opened her mouth to speak but nothing came out. Apparently, whatever had happened was enough to keep her from translating her thoughts into words. In her place, Olivia spoke up.

'Hope and I were getting together while Cam was out with his buddies' she explained. 'When I got to his apartment, this Jesse guy was there. Hope says he had a gun and he threatened to hurt her.’

Sara's mouth dropped as guilt bubbled in her gut. She knew very well where Cam was and it wasn't at the local pub enjoying a cold brewskie or two with his friends. By keeping quiet about Cam's role in the bust, had she been an unwitting accomplice to this horrible attack on her own daughter?

'Are you sure you're not hurt?' she asked again as she began to scrutinize her daughter, palpating her arms, her head, her face.

'No-n-no. J-j-just scared' Hope whimpered.

This time, it was Sara who pulled her daughter into her arms, running her hand through her hair as Hope began to cry again, relieved to be safe in her mother's embrace.

'Oh my God' Sara murmured as she held her, rocking her back and forth against her chest.

Hope pulled away and looked at her mom, her face blotchy and red. 'M-m-mom, I can't reach C-c-c-c' she cried, unable to get the words out.

'It's okay honey, it's okay' Sara said, using her most reassuring tone. 'We'll find him, we'll find him.’

Tears filled her eyes as she pulled Hope into her arms again, Olivia watching with wide eyes as the two women held each other. The rocking resumed, back and forth, back and forth as Sara comforted her sobbing daughter.

Olivia brought her hand to rest on Hope's back, gently rubbing as the three women huddled together in the safety of the Caffrey kitchen.

WCWCWC

Cameron had balked all the way to the ER, insisting he was just fine. The fact that he was clasping his side with every breath and that an angry bruise had begun to form on his chest appeared to be in stark contradiction to Cam's premature - and amateur - diagnosis. He was eager to check in with Hope and make sure she was all right but he'd refrained from calling her. Picking up the phone and having to explain that he was in a hospital emergency room, suffering from repercussions of a bullet fired at his chest through a Kevlar vest… well, it seemed like a discussion that would be better had in person.

Instead, back at the warehouse, Neal had put in a quick call to Sara to let her know the mission was complete and quizzing her on Hope's condition. Sara had been quick to reassure him that Hope had made her way home safe and sound and that she was eager to hear from Cameron. Neal explained that they would be getting home as soon as they got things 'wrapped up' — words that had been purposefully vague and carefully chosen. If his ambiguous response had led her to draw certain conclusions as to what those loose ends might be, so be it. As with Cam, he wasn't keen on having the touchy conversation about why they were in an emergency room following a takedown — at least, not until it became absolutely necessary to do so.

'This is ridiculous' Cam moaned between laboured breaths as he sat in the hospital waiting room. 'I need to get back to Hope.’

'I told you she's fine' Neal said, a slight exaggeration but a necessary fib to keep him from exiting the ER prematurely. 'Sara says she's at our place, she's a little shaken up but she's fine. You can see her as soon as we get you checked out.’

Cameron had been fighting him all the way, insisting he didn't need to see a doctor. Neal knew better; he suspected his protégé might be suffering from a cracked rib or two if not worse.

Peter hovered nearby, having insisted on tagging along to make sure everything was under control. For his part, Mozzie, his hospital phobia in full manifestation, had retreated to one of his safe houses to mourn the desecration of the leather jacket he'd loaned Cameron. The coat had fallen victim to the unfortunate incident, having suffered an irreparable hole about the size of a quarter — or was that the size of a bullet?

Peter had begun to wonder if he'd acted irresponsibly by sanctioning their little operation. He was supposed to be the thoughtful, logical one, the one who thought things through carefully and didn't make decisions on impulse contrary to… well, you know. In an attempt to pacify both Neal and Cam and with a view to getting a scumbag like Jesse Davis off the street, he'd been only too willing to go along with what he now realized was a flawed plan.

He patted his coat pocket where he'd stashed the cameo brooch waiting to be returned to its rightful owner and took a seat next to Cameron.

'You know Cam, you can't take this kind of thing too lightly. You could have internal injuries' he reminded him.

'I just want to get home to Hope' Cam repeated, still looking bewildered.

The phone in Neal's pocket vibrated and he glanced down at the screen. Sara, aka the family pitbull. No doubt she was calling to find out what was taking them so long. Neal shot Peter a look of trepidation and stepped away, bracing himself for the Spanish Inquisition.

The options at his disposal included declining the call (ill advised), developing an elaborate lie he'd have to later recant (short term gain for long term pain) or coming clean without creating a panic (tricky at best). There was always the option of leaving town without a trace, a solution which seemed a tad bit extreme although he did consider it for a fleeting moment. None of the options before him were ideal. In the split second before answering, Neal decided to go with the tried and true 'good news, bad news' approach - always a winning move when he wanted to keep Sara from totally losing her shit.

'Hey babe!' he chirped into the phone, trying to sound upbeat.

'Neal!' she exclaimed at the sound of his voice. 'What the hell's going on? What's taking so long?’

'Hey honey, good news' he chanted. 'Jesse's being processed and we found the brooch, it had rolled off into a corner of the warehouse.’

Sara scoffed and Neal picked up on more than a flicker of annoyance. 'Neal, I don't give a rat's ass about the cameo. I'm trying to keep Hope from losing it here. Are you guys almost done giving your statements? I'm running out of excuses for why Cam hasn't gotten in touch yet.’

Apparently, his previous attempt at obfuscating the facts had been highly successful in leading her pretty far down a deceptive path. He hadn't said so specifically but it was perfectly reasonable for Sara to assume they were down at the Bureau, giving their statements to Jones and his team. In fact, Neal had purposely led her to the water's edge and gladly watched as she'd taken a drink.

He'd been married to this woman long enough to know that her clipped tone of voice and use of profanity were signs that she was preparing to climb the anger meter, past annoyance on her way to exasperation and finally, if he didn't keep things from escalating, flat out fury. There was silence for a moment as he pondered the best strategy to come clean about where they really were and what had transpired at the warehouse. Time to call his silver tongue into service.

'Actually…' he began then sputtered unexpectedly. There were no words, really.

'What's going on? What is it you're not telling me?’

'It's… it's nothing. Really. Just a little… mishap.’

He could see her in his mind's eye, her body tensing up, her features growing taut, her eyes narrowing.

'Mishap? I knew it! What happened?’

'Here's the funny thing…' Neal attempted, knowing full well she was on the verge of blowing a gasket. 'We're not actually at the Bureau. What happened was… Peter and I were talking last night and we thought it would be a good… precaution if we put Cam in a vest. Just to be on the safe side.’

'What are you talking about?' she said with alarm. 'Where the hell are you?’

'We're… we're still in Brooklyn. We're in the ER at Brookdale' he finally blurted out.

He braced himself for her response which did not take long in coming. 

'What?' she shouted although he could tell she was doing her best to keep the rest of the household from hearing. 'Cam was shot?’

'No, no, of course not. He was just… dazed.’

'Dazed? What do you mean dazed? Just spit it out Neal.’

'All right, all right' he said, finally giving in. Sometimes, talking to his wife was like undergoing a police interrogation; she never gave up.

'During the takedown, Jesse pulled out a gun and —‘

Sara cut him off, her voice growing angrier by the minute. 'Neal Caffrey, I swear to God…’

'He's fine Sara' he interrupted, eager to set the record straight. 'The vest did an excellent job… but I thought we should have him checked out just in case. Look, they're going to call him in any second and we'll be home in no time. Just… try to keep Hope calm in the meantime.’

Sara wasn't interested in heeding advice from her impulsive husband. 'I can NOT believe you! You promised me nothing would go wrong and now you're telling me Cameron was shot. And meanwhile, your daughter is sitting here heartbroken, wondering why he hasn't called her himself to check on her.’

Ding, ding, ding, ding. There it was, as if she'd taken a giant swing of the mallet and sent the puck flying all the way to the top at the county fair. Whenever Sara referred to one of their kids as 'his' son or daughter, it was a sure sign she'd hit her limit as far as her husband's shenanigans were concerned.

Neal closed his eyes and bravely took the tongue lashing. Once Sara finished chewing him out, he attempted one more manoeuvre to talk her down.

'Just… let's try to look on the bright side here, babe. Jesse's been arrested, Hope is safe, Cam is going to be okay and we got the brooch back. It's a win-w —'

Sara let out a frustrated huff on the other end and then, not surprisingly, the line went dead.

WCWCWC

'What was I thinking' Cameron said, his face pale. 'What possessed me to think I could go from mild-mannered art gallery manager to superhero? I should have been home with Hope, helping to keep her safe.’

Peter brought his arm to rest on his shoulder. 'You did what you thought was right. And you were doing it for Hope. You had no idea Jesse would come after her. Let's just be grateful she wasn't hurt.’

Cameron's red rimmed eyes stared back. 'The guy's a fucking lunatic…’

Peter did not dispute his appraisal of the criminal who'd just been arrested. 'Well, he's off the streets now and he won't be bothering Hope any more.’

Cam didn't look convinced so Peter tried another route. 'Look, we'll just make sure you check out okay and then you can go home and explain everything to Hope. You'll see, she'll understand.’

Cam sighed and Peter watched as the young man's eyes narrowed and his mouth drooped. Neal was on the way back to join them when a nurse stood from the triage desk and looked out into the busy waiting room.

'Cameron Armstrong!’  
WCWCWC

'Sorry about hanging up on you earlier' Sara said, once the house had finally settled for the night.

Neal waved off her apology; he'd already written it off as a case of 'Sara nerves'. It was the permanent state of their relationship: in times of crisis, he got quieter, she got louder.

It was well past midnight and everyone was secreted away in their own little personal space, absorbing the turbulent events of the evening. Hope and Cam were up on the third floor and Caitlin had retreated to her own room down the hall, shaken yet relieved that Jesse had been found.

'Caitlin took it pretty well' Neal said as he slipped in between the sheets. ‘Better than I expected.’

Sara sighed, joining him in bed. 'Just give her some time to absorb everything. She's putting on a brave face but it's got to hurt, hearing Jesse's been carted off to jail.’

'Well, he is her brother… for better or for worse.’

Sara craned her neck to get a better look at his face. 'She really has come a long way, hasn't she?’

He nodded. 'Yeah, but that's two huge losses for her in the last forty-eight hours. We need to keep an eye on her, make sure she's all right.’

Quiet resumed then Neal spoke again. 'Do you think we're making a mistake letting her give part of the eulogy?’

'It won't be easy but it's really important to her' Sara replied wisely. 'Besides, Liam said they could go up together so he could be with her when she does her thing.’

Neal smiled in the darkened room. Liam was really stepping up at a time when he needed him the most. He felt a shiver up his spine.

'You okay?' Sara asked.

He let out a huge lungful of air and settled in closer to his wife. 'I feel bad for Cam. I should have prepared him better. I guess I underestimated how desperate Jesse might get.’

Sara remained silent. The words I told you so danced on the tip of her tongue but she managed to swallow them down.

'Thank God Jones and his guys were there' Neal added.

She could feel his body shaking and she pulled the blanket tighter around him, bringing her arm around his chest in an embrace.

'You've been through a lot too, Neal. I can only imagine how you felt when you found out Jesse had paid Hope a visit.’

'I just… I lost it when Cam said he'd been to their apartment.’

'She seems okay, scared more than anything else. Now that they've got Jesse off the street, I think she'll be able to relax.’

'Luckily, she's got Cam to lean on' Neal said, growing quiet.

He squeezed her shoulder. 'And I've got you.’

'Always' she whispered.

Neal's body might be giving in to the weariness but his mind was still in overdrive. 'You should have seen him attack Jesse. He had time to get a couple of good solid hits in before Peter and I jumped in. It all happened so fast.’

'I can't even imagine Cam being violent. He's such a gentle soul.’

'Well, I almost lost it too when he told me what Jesse had done to Hope. It's a good thing Jones and Peter were there to talk me down or they might have been dragging my sorry ass down to the police station along with Jesse.’

'What about Cam?’

Neal shook his head. 'Jones walked in after the gun went off, technically he didn't see Cam hit Jesse. Everybody in the room said they didn't know how Jesse had gotten hurt.’

'Thank goodness for that. All Hope needs is to have her boyfriend carted off to jail for aggravated assault.’

'Fiancé' Neal corrected.

Sara scoffed. 'With everything happening, this, the funeral… it's hard to believe we have a wedding coming up in a few weeks.’

Neal drew her near, placing a kiss on the top of her head. 'It'll be nice to focus on something positive for a change.’

They heard footsteps up above, Cam and Hope getting ready for bed.

'You gonna be able to sleep?' Sara asked.

'I'm exhausted' he admitted, his eyelids drooping despite his best efforts to keep them open.

'I love you Caffrey' Sara murmured.

But Neal had already drifted off.

WCWCWC

Up on the third floor, the young couple prepared for bed. At least for now, they still carried the physical and emotional scars of the last few hours but they were beyond relieved to finally be together. They sat on the edge of the bed, Hope peeking underneath the pressure bandage that had been carefully wrapped around Cam's chest to help support the cracked rib he'd suffered.

'I can't believe the state you're in' Hope said. 'What were you thinking?’

He ignored the question, pulling her in to him with a grimace. 'I'm just so glad you're safe' he murmured into her hair.

'Me too' she replied, her voice growing shaky. 'I mean I'm glad you're safe. I guess Grandma was looking out for both of us tonight.’

He held her tight. It hurt like hell but he didn't care, he kept squeezing until Hope let out a gasp, fighting for air.

'I'm sorry' he said, once they'd pulled apart. 'Here I was, going all macho, trying to defend your honour and meanwhile you were in real danger.’

Hope ran her hand down his cheek and chuckled nervously in an effort to bring the drama down a notch. 'I don't think I was ever in any real danger. Jesse was waving that thing around like it was an extension of his tiny little penis' she said, hoping to put a smile on Cam's face. The truth was she'd been terrified that gun was going to go off at any minute.

'Olivia was my guardian angel' she added. 'I've never been so happy to see her in my life.’

'Remind me to send her some flowers tomorrow' Cam said, pulling her in against him once more.

He winced and she felt his body tighten in discomfort. 'Come on, let's get you to bed, Superman.’

Cam shook his head. 'I feel a lot more like mild-mannered Clark Kent' he admitted.

'I love Clark Kent' Hope replied, reaching up to place a kiss on his cheek.

He relaxed at the sight of her, his beautiful Hope, safe in his arms.

'Come on Lois. Time for bed.'

TBC


	63. Chapter 63

‘You all right?’ Sara asked as Neal stepped into the bedroom. 

He stood before her, buck naked except for a thick white towel loosely tucked around his hips. His shoulders here slumped, his arms listless by his side, his posture defeated, looking like a little boy who’d just had his bike stolen. He remained there, silent, just staring out into space as if he hadn't heard her speak.

He’d been in the shower an awfully long time. So long, that just moments before, Sara had actually been contemplating going into the bathroom to make sure he was all right. She’d refrained; checking in on your sixty-year-old husband while he was showering seemed a little over the top, even for her.

The first thing she noticed as she studied his face was that his eyes were red and droopy, very unlike him - unless, of course, this was the day you were saying a final goodbye to your beloved mother. Ever since the turbulent events of Monday night, she’d picked up on a quiet melancholy about him, diametrically opposed to his normal, upbeat disposition. Neal Caffrey always had an aura about him, a confidence and vitality that radiated off him, regardless of circumstances. He was the poster boy for the glass half-full doctrine, poetry in motion from the way he moved to the sparkle in his eye, from the easy smile on his face to the soothing sound of his voice. But once he'd ascertained that both Hope and Cam were on the mend and that Caitlin hadn't totally fallen apart, it was as if he’d retreated into his own little world, away from the rest of the family, avoiding everyone. 

Including Sara. 

At first, she’d chalked it up to him being exhausted following the events of the last few days. But now, she wondered if she hadn't underestimated just how truly devastated he was at his mom’s passing. The relationship between Linda Bennett and her son had been a complicated one, rife with conflicting emotions. Like a festering wound, his estrangement from his mom had persisted for the better part of forty years and he’d convinced himself that he never wanted to open that Pandora’s box. During all the years Sara had known him, he'd managed to cover up that little boy sadness by making use of those conman skills he'd so artfully developed. 

Sara had been there when mother and son had come face to face for the first time, his resolve melting into a puddle of conflicting and uncontrollable emotions. She’d also witnessed the weeks and months that followed, the slow rapprochement that had taken place between the two of them, the gradual crumbling of the wall Neal had so diligently built to keep himself from feeling anything about the woman who’d given birth to him and had ultimately abandoned him. The passage of time as well as Neal’s forgiving nature had taken care of the rest.

‘Neal?’ she repeated.

‘What?’ 

‘You all right?’

‘Yeah, why?’

Sara pointed to his eyes, puffy and red.

‘Oh, I… got some shampoo in my eye.’

‘Both of them?’ she replied, skeptical.

He cleared his throat and looked away, walking resolutely towards his dresser where he opened his underwear drawer and began fiddling with the assortment of boxer shorts as if trying to choose just the right ones - silly really, considering they were all the same style in varying shades of black, grey and blue. 

‘Honey, it’s okay…’ she said, bridging the distance between them and laying a gentle hand on his still damp back.

He stopped fiddling but didn't turn to face her. As if her gentle touch had unleashed something in him, he began to shake, his shoulders heaving up and down violently as he let out an audible sob.

Sara took a step forward and forcibly insinuated herself into the narrow space between her husband and the dresser. He took a step back to make room for her, his arms reaching out to pull her into his dripping wet chest. 

‘You’re shaking’ she said, running her hands up and down his back. Neal just held on, his body wracked with sobs. 

They held each other in silence, Sara wisely letting the rare moment of discomposure pass without a word. The outburst seemed to end as suddenly as it had started and Neal pulled away, placing his hands on her shoulders and taking a step back.

‘Sorry’ he murmured, looking into her eyes. ‘I didn't see that one coming.’ 

She nodded in understanding. ‘You’ve been so busy with all the fallout from this thing with Jesse, I don’t think you’ve given yourself time to grieve.’ 

He let his head drop to one side and shrugged looking like a lost little boy. Maybe she was right. 

‘Here, sit’ she said, pushing him up against the edge of the bed. She walked across the room to the chair by her side of the bed and returned with a towel, running it through his wet hair.

‘You’re dripping all over the place’ she said, trying her best to sound annoyed.

‘There’ she said once she was done. She wiped his forehead and placed a kiss between his eyebrows, a mom making it all better for her little one. 

Neal looked up at her with those sad, empty eyes and pulled her closer, pressing his face up against her stomach and reaching out to circle her waist. Sara stood like that for a moment or two, letting him find solace and comfort in the warmth of her bosom. She could hear him breathing, no crying this time, just the sound of uneven air drifting in and out, in and out. He nuzzled her belly, rubbing his face against her blouse like a cuddly cat seeking affection and comfort and Sara moved to rest her hands on the top of his head, slowly smoothing his damp hair with nimble fingers. Over and over again until he quieted.

‘I’m glad you’re letting it out’ she confided in a whisper. ‘You’ve been keeping it all bottled up inside.’

She felt him shaking his head and when he spoke, his voice was muffled, his face pressed up against her. ‘I just wanted to make sure everybody else was all right.’

With that, he pulled away and looked up at her, smiling sadly. ‘Thanks for being here Repo.’

She scoffed; as if she’d be anywhere else in his time of need. Or at any other time for that matter.

‘I told you, you can’t do this all by yourself Caffrey’ she murmured. ‘When are you going to learn that?’

He shrugged again and gave her a self-deprecating smile.

A large water stain had appeared on the front of her silk blouse and Neal pointed to it, giving her a crooked smile. ‘Sorry… I think I messed up your blouse.’ 

She just shrugged; it was the least of her worries.

Neal got to his feet, the mood changing instantly. It seemed he was done wallowing. 

‘What time does Liam get in?’ he asked, his voice strong.

‘Around ten. Cody’s picking him up at the airport.’

‘Cody, huh? Again?’ he said with a knowing grin. Without a second thought, he made his way back to his dresser and grabbed a pair of boxers, slamming the drawer shut decisively and moving on to his sock drawer to make his selection.

‘And what time is El bringing over the food?’

Sara glanced at the bedside clock on her way to the closet to find another blouse. ‘In about half an hour.’

‘I was thinking I’d take Caitlin out for breakfast, feel her out, see if she’s okay with… everything’ Neal announced.

Sara began to search through her wardrobe, looking for an appropriate top to change into. She shrugged out of the wet blouse and placed it carefully on the chair by the bed. It would need to be properly dry cleaned. 

‘I think that’s a great idea honey’ she called out over her shoulder.

Neal was already pulling on a pair of pants, his demeanour a lot more lighthearted than when he’d stepped out of the shower moments before.

‘And I know you told me to relax and let El deal with all the food but I was thinking I’d make a quick batch of those pecan squares my mom liked so much. It’ll be like….’

Sara glanced in his direction but he was avoiding her gaze, busily pulling on his socks. Frankly, it was a relief to see him back in action mode. Busy hands would help keep his mind occupied on a day where emotions were bound to be tearing at his heart.

‘I think she’d love that.’

WCWCWC

The Westchester County Airport was busy as always on this midweek morning; one might say, it was organized chaos. Passengers rushed by in all directions, intent on catching their flight or conversely catching a cab to their New York destination. Dozens of people waited patiently for their flights to be called or for their loved ones to return.

Cody Miller sat on a bench by the Starbucks and waited patiently for the arrival of flight 382 from Arlington. The connection through Ronald Reagan Airport was a minor inconvenience for Liam but he’d managed to get a great connection to Westchester, making the detour worthwhile. Cody appreciated not having to drive out to Queens but, let’s face it, he would gladly go to the ends of the earth if it meant he could spend precious time with Liam Caffrey. 

He noticed a commotion nearby: a group of what appeared to be middle school kids talking excitedly about their school trip to Washington while their teachers looked on, trying valiantly not to appear panicked. Better them than him, Cody thought with a silent chuckle.

Ever since he’d seen Liam the previous weekend, his ex had been on his mind constantly. Whereas their breakup the previous summer had left him confused and uncertain about the depth of his feelings for him, the more time he spent in Liam’s orbit, the clearer things became. There was no longer any doubt in Cody’s mind: Liam Caffrey was the man for him and he was pinning all his hopes on an eventual reconciliation. 

With Liam preparing to go away to university, both young men had agreed that they needed to give each other some space to explore new avenues and embrace new adventures. There was something about starting a relationship when you were in your early teens… as you got older and life started to pull you in different directions, you began to wonder if you might be missing out on new and exciting opportunities by staying together. After all, was anybody really destined to have a long term relationship with their high school sweetheart? 

Of course, everybody knew some story about an elderly couple who had met in their youth and had lived in perfect harmony for twenty, fifty, sixty years. But more often than not, such relationships were doomed as life pulled both halves of a couple down different paths. Weren’t high school crushes just that, high school crushes, meant to elicit secret, nostalgic smiles as one got older and tended to reflect on loves lost? 

But now, a mere six months after their breakup, Cody had come to the conclusion that there was no one out there in the big scary world who made his pulse quicken the way Liam did. But did Liam feel the same way? He’d appeared keen enough to reconnect when he’d come home over the Christmas holidays but somehow, the planets hadn't been aligned when they'd come face to face on New Year’s Eve. Liam’s lack of transparency regarding his relationship with Todd had put the kibosh on any possible reconciliation. Now that a little time had passed, Cody realized his ego had been bruised, his pride had been hurt by what he'd perceived to be a betrayal. In fact, the emotions which had bubbled to the surface that night were an undeniable sign that he was still very much in love with Liam Caffrey.

There was loud giggling and Cody became aware of a beehive of activity around him. He checked the arrival board for the umpteenth time and tried to slow his breathing and quiet his pounding heart. It would do no good to put the horse before the cart. Sure, all indications were that he and Liam had been growing closer over the past few weeks. But did Liam want a reconciliation or was Cody just hoping he did? He let out a loud sigh, trying to catch his breath. 

He looked up to see a couple of boys from the school group roughhousing nearby, laughing and shoving each other playfully. He picked up on an intensity in their eyes, that lingering look you got when your stomach flip-flopped and your hormones went haywire at the sight of someone you thought was really cute. He could remember getting giddy at the sight of Liam when they’d first met, his heart pounding so loud in his chest whenever Liam touched him in passing. He used to wonder if everyone around him could hear it. He shook off the memory and returned his gaze to the two boys who were smiling goofily at each other. Oh yeah, they had it bad. Hopefully, like himself and Liam, these boys had loving and supportive families and would be free to live their true lives. 

His random musings were interrupted by the announcement that the flight from Arlington was arriving at gate seven. He took a deep breath and stood on shaky legs. 

WCWCWC

Breakfast at Mel’s Diner was usually a weekend thing for the Caffrey family. They’d frequented the local eatery for over twenty years, ever since they’d moved to White Plains. Sometimes, they came in groups of two or three, other times Neal came just with Sara or Peter or to have a private chat with one of the kids. Still other times, the whole clan descended on the place with the Burkes and Mozzie in tow. 

Sonia Ramirez, waitress and long suffering spouse of Mel, welcomed the duo at the front of the restaurant. She leaned over to peek behind Neal to see if more Caffreys were coming along behind him.

‘Just the two of us today Sonia’ Neal said with a friendly smile.

She pointed to their usual booth and followed them over to the table, carrying menus. She was unusually quiet and Neal wondered what was up; hopefully she and Mel weren’t fighting again.

‘Mel and I were really sorry to hear about your mother’ she murmured, elucidating the mystery as to why the usually perky woman was suddenly so solemn. 

‘Thanks Sonia, I appreciate that’ Neal replied soberly.

‘Coffee?’ she asked, looking uncomfortable. 

‘Please’ Neal replied as Caitlin proceeded to take off her jacket and throw it in the booth next to her. 

They settled in face to face, both of them quieter than usual.

‘So, how did you sleep?’ Neal finally asked.

‘Not bad’ she said with a sad smile. ‘I dreamt about Grandma. Again.’

Neal leaned in to listen.

‘In my dream, she wasn't sick, she was living somewhere else in another city and you and I were visiting her.’

He smiled, imagining the scene.

She continued. ‘But she was old just like… well, like when she died.’ 

Neal nodded. ‘She’s been on my mind pretty well constantly. Are you ready for this afternoon?’

Caitlin looked down at the empty cup and was staring into it when Sonia returned carrying a fresh pot of coffee. ‘What can I get you folks?’

‘I’ll have the special, poached with bacon’ Neal said, not even bothering to open the menu.

‘Same but over easy for me.’

‘So?’ Neal said once Sonia had left. ‘This afternoon…’

Caitlin looked up at him, her face drawn, her eyes droopy. ‘Do you think there’ll be lots of people there?’

‘Probably not. I’m sure there’ll be some people from Blue Skies, people from the art school, maybe a few folks from Sara’s work, Peter and Elizabeth, the Masons, the Jordans, the Millers, you know, the usual suspects. I called and left a message at the nursing home in St-Louis but that would be an awfully long way for someone to come.’

‘Grandma didn't have very many friends… except for the family.’

Neal nodded. It was true. Sadly, Linda Bennett had spent most of her life pushing people away, focussed on getting her next high. She’d been almost sixty years old by the time she’d finally gotten clean. Up until that point, she’d been surviving rather than living.  
‘Grandma had a hard life’ Neal said wistfully. ‘Up until recently, I don’t remember ever seeing her smile.’

‘She was a good person Mr. C. She helped me an awful lot.’

Neal smiled sadly. ‘I know she did honey. And I’m so glad you got to know her.’

‘Me too.’

‘You still okay with saying a few words this afternoon?’

Caitlin’s eyes became animated. ‘Yeah… I really, really want to do this. Liam called me last night, he said he’d be there for me if I got… upset.’

‘That’s nice… so you and Liam are really getting along, huh?’

‘Yeah, we’re good. You know, I understand why he was so angry with me at Christmas. He was right. I was acting like a spoiled brat. I wasn't thinking about how my actions were affecting you.’

Neal nodded. ‘I’m okay. You don’t have to worry about me.’

Sonia appeared, carrying two large plates of food which she placed in front of them. ‘Mel says breakfast is on the house today’ she announced.

‘Thanks’ Neal said with an appreciative smile. 

She was gone in a flash and Neal looked across the table at Caitlin who didn't seem all that keen to dig in.

‘Not hungry?’

‘I’m hungry… I just… my stomach’s a little upset.’

Her eyes rose to meet his. ‘I’m glad you stopped Jesse’ she said out of the blue. ‘What he did was horrible. He took advantage of your hospitality and he scared Hope. She didn't deserve that.’

He could see doubt in her eyes. ‘But?’

She shrugged.

‘Honey, Jesse’s your brother. It’s only normal that you’d feel… torn.’

Caitlin looked away. ‘It’s not that… well, not just that. I feel responsible for bringing him into our lives.’

Neal’s hand was instantly on hers. ‘You didn't do any of this Caitlin. None of this is your fault. I know it’s gotta be hard seeing what he did but bottom line, you’re not to blame for any of it, do you hear me?’

‘He’s my brother’ she said as tears appeared in her eyes. ‘How could he not care about what he was doing to me?’

There was no easy answer as to why someone drifted so far away from the straight and narrow without regard for how their actions affected others. Neal had a brief flash of all the times he skirted the law, justifying his actions one way or another. He’d never physically harmed anyone but… it was a slippery slope once you rationalized unlawful behaviour.

‘I’m sorry Caitlin. I know it’s hard. But remember, you always have me and Sara and Hope and Liam and… all of us. You’re part of our family and we’ll always have your back, no matter what.’

She sniffled and wiped her nose with her napkin.

‘Now, why don’t you try to get a few bites down. The last thing Grandma would want is for you to pass out just when you’re about to say nice things about her.’

She managed a smile and picked up her fork as Neal watched her carefully. She was such a contradiction: a caring, loving young woman who was so full of doubt, who felt unworthy of having good things happen to her. She had certainly come a long way since those early days when she’d accused him of sexual impropriety and had walked away with a pocketful of Sara’s jewelry. He was glad they hadn't given up on her. There was light at the end of the tunnel. Giving a eulogy would be tough but Neal had a sense it would be healing for her, allow her to get some of those feelings out in the open - better than turning on herself as she had a habit of doing.

Caitlin caught him studying her and smiled, a mouthful of toast in her mouth. She pointed to his plate. 

‘You should follow your own advice, Mr. C.’

WCWCWC

Cody Miller had a lot of wonderful qualities. He was attentive, caring, generous and had a wicked sense of humour. What he wasn't very good at, was lying. When he mentioned that he’d forgotten his phone at home and needed to make a quick detour to go pick it up, Liam had immediately grown suspicious of the man’s true intentions.

Sure enough, they had been in the empty house for all of thirty seconds when Cody slammed him up against the wall in the front hallway and planted a wallop of a kiss on Liam’s surprised but grateful lips.

‘You didn't really forget your phone, did you?’ Liam said breathlessly when they finally pulled apart. 

Cody gave him a mischievous grin that said you caught me. ‘Can’t fool you, huh Caffrey?’

By way of reply, Liam moved in for another voracious kiss. This kind of deception he could certainly put up with. As if they’d never been apart, their mouths found each other, their tongues mingling, soft moans escaping their lips. The tension intensified and before long, their hands got into the act, roaming, wandering, rediscovering all too familiar territory as their breathing grew laboured. One item at a time, clothing was shed and mysteriously, their legs carried them towards the family room and the soft, welcoming couch. They flopped down onto the cushions, their hands groping each other with more and more intensity, moans and groans and hesitant sighs the only sound resonating in the silent house.

‘We alone?’ Liam whispered between impassioned kisses.

‘Uh huh’ came the distracted reply.

As if snapping out of a trance, Liam’s face grew serious as he pulled away and brought his hands to frame Cody’s face. ‘Are you sure about this?’ 

Cody shook his head and frowned, an impish smile appearing on his lips. ‘No. I tricked you into coming here and proceeded to jump your bones the second we stepped into the house because I really don’t want this.’

Liam grinned widely. There was that wicked sense of humour. 

They were down to their boxers in no time, clothes strewn carelessly on the floor all around them, their passion growing with every passing second. Hands wandered, lips searched and landed, mouths fused, bodies began to coalesce. 

After a few moments of moaning and groaning and touching and kissing, they stopped, staring into each other’s eyes. 

‘Is this really happening?’ Liam asked.

‘I hope so’ Cody replied breathlessly. ‘Otherwise, I’m having one helluva dream.’

Liam let out a guttural groan as he felt the desire rising in him. ‘I could help make that a wet dream if you let me’ he said provocatively.

Without a word, they returned to the business of groping, hands moving lighting fast, exploring each other’s warm, familiar bodies. It was like returning to a wonderfully happy place after being away too long, the excitement of that first time recaptured, that feeling of wellbeing overwhelming their senses.

‘I’ve missed you so much’ Cody murmured, his mouth moving from Liam’s ear down to his chest, his teeth nipping at his hardened nubs as his hands continued groping Liam’s perfect bubble butt.

Liam let his head fall back, letting the stimulating sensations wash over him. ‘But you saw me just last weekend’ he argued playfully. 

‘Not like this, I didn’t’ Cody countered as he reached down to remove Liam’s underwear. 

His mouth wandered south and Liam felt a jolt of longing all the way to the tips of his toes. With a loud groan, he brought his hand to rest on Cody’s head, tugging at his hair as he began to lose control. He’d wanted this for so long and as complicated as their past might be, in this moment, there was no uncertainty, no doubt that they were meant to be together.

‘I love you’ he whispered, his voice rough.

Cody moaned softly in response. He looked up at Liam’s blissful face, his eyes closed in rapture, his mouth open as the sensations washed over him. It was that beautiful face that got his heart pumping every single time. He smiled to no one but himself and returned to the business of showing Liam just exactly how he felt about him.

WCWCWC

‘You’re home!’ Sara shouted as she threw her arms around her son’s neck.

Liam glanced over at Cody with a lopsided grin. ‘Mom, you’re acting like I’ve been away for months. You just saw me last weekend.’

She ignored the comment and slipped her arm in his, then turned and did the same with Cody, dragging them both into the kitchen where the rest of the clan was assembled.

‘What took you guys so long?’ she asked. 

‘Cody… forgot his phone’ Liam said, avoiding Cody’s gaze. ‘We had to pop over to his place to get it.’

Liam disentangled himself from his mom and started making the rounds of everyone before she asked any more questions.

Neal’s head popped up. ‘Hey buddy. I’m glad you’re home. How was the flight?’

‘Good. Non eventful.’ 

Liam made his way around the table, placing a kiss on Hope’s cheek and kissing his aunt Elizabeth in greeting.

He gave Cam a playful punch on the arm on his way past him. ‘Hey Boy Wonder! I heard about your exploits.’

‘I prefer Superman’ Cam grumbled. ‘If you don’t mind.’

Liam was acutely aware of the expression on Caitlin’s face; he immediately regretted his comment. Surely, this whole thing with her brother couldn't be easy on her. He made his way over to where she sat and leaned down to whisper in her ear. 

‘Hey sis’ he murmured to her delight. ‘How you doin’?’

A small smile appeared on her face and Liam finally took a seat next to his dad and ogled the food on the table.

‘I’m starved!’ he said, loading up his plate without hesitation. 

‘Your suit is freshly pressed and there’s a new shirt on your bed’ Sara reminded him. 

Liam nodded and watched as Cody joined the group, slipping in between Peter and Hope. Nobody asked outright but everybody seemed to pick up on a different vibe between the two young men, an easiness that hadn't been there since before their breakup. 

‘You two look… relaxed’ Cam commented innocently.

Hope poked him gently in the ribs, eliciting a small yelp from him. ‘What? What did I say?’

Hope rolled her eyes and looked over at her folks, exchanging curious looks. Neal ploughed ahead, putting an end to the momentary awkwardness. 

‘It’s really nice to see you Cody’ he said with a smile. He looked in Liam’s direction and winked. ‘If you’re not careful, we’re going to start getting used to having you around again.’

Cody smiled timidly and stuffed a piece of cheese into his mouth. 

He pointed to all the food set out on the nearby kitchen counter. ‘What’s with all the food?’ he asked, eager to change the subject. 

‘We’ve invited everybody over after the funeral’ Sara explained.

She stood behind Neal, her hands firmly on his shoulders, grounding him. He was much calmer since he’d returned from having breakfast with Caitlin. The die was cast and now there was nothing to do but get through the next few hours as best they could.

‘What time should we leave?’ Hope asked.

‘It’s only about ten minutes away. I’d say about half past’ Neal replied.

He glanced around the table at the members of his extended family, every single one of them as precious to him as the next. He felt emotion rising in his chest, a mix of heartache, melancholy, comfort, fondness and affection. It was going to be a difficult day but somehow, being surrounded by everyone he loved gave him the strength and courage he needed to face what lay ahead.

He was grateful for that.

TBC


	64. Chapter 64

Walking into the Burns Funeral Home felt like déjà vu. Not because of the building itself but rather because of the overwhelming yet all too familiar grief that overcame Neal once he’d stepped inside. 

The feeling of losing his mother. All over again. 

The sensation had nothing to do with the venue itself. The quaint little chapel which was located at the back of the two story building was tastefully decorated but it was modest in size, able to accommodate no more than fifty or so mourners. In contrast, June’s service had seemed like a state funeral. It had been a grandiose affair, held in a stately church not too far from his old place on Riverside Drive and the pews had been full to overflowing with friends, family and acquaintances. 

Upon surveying the space, Neal couldn't help but reflect that, as with the choice of venues for their final goodbyes, the two women he’d called ‘Mom’ couldn't have been more different. Whereas June Ellington had been an active member of the community, a philanthropist, a patron of the arts, a connoisseur of fine things, Linda Bennett had been a simple woman, quiet and unassuming. 

Unlike June, who had been left with what some might describe as excessive wealth, Linda had been forced to make do with very little after her husband had disappeared from her life and the life of their little boy. Due to the circumstances surrounding his arrest and incarceration, she had not been entitled to his pension benefits and although she’d held down a job for the first few years they’d lived in St. Louis, she had quickly made a mess of things, her addiction gaining on her with every passing day. 

To say that she and Neal had lived simply back then was quite the understatement. Neal remembered days when she didn't even have a dollar to her name so that her son could go on a school outing with the rest of his class, days when his mother slept it off in another room while Neal scrambled to pull together something to eat, making do with ketchup sandwiches and plain noodles or stale crackers. It had led to some pretty creative problem solving but he hadn't been able to get past the resentment of not having what most of his classmates had: two parents who doted on him and provided for his needs.

And yet, knowing what he did today, he didn't begrudge his mother any of it. Her heart had been broken and without adequate support, she hadn't been able to get herself back on her feet. After a while, she’d given up on life and once her addiction had gotten a firm hold of her, it had become about survival and nothing more.

But whereas June had given him a leg up when he needed it and had taught him to believe in himself, Linda had given him life and, like an apparition, she had come back into his life at a time when he’d been struggling with his own demons and had begun to lose faith in himself.

He was grateful for both women. 

Over the past few days, as he prepared to let his mom go, he’d been contemplating what might have been. He couldn't help but wonder what might have happened if he’d reached out to her sooner. He recalled how recklessly he’d tossed away that first letter she’d sent, asking to see him. He’d been so full of anger and resentment back then, the pain so deep that he’d had no interest in coming face to face with her again. The passage of time and persistent bitterness had hardened him, he a man who was by nature so gentle and loving. If it hadn't been for Sara’s meddling, he could be getting a phone call right now from the nursing home in St. Louis, telling him his estranged mother had passed away without ever having made peace with the past.

He shook his head. This was no time for regrets. It was a day to be grateful for the five wonderful years they’d had together. Five years to make up for all those years apart. Five years to soothe the pain and resentment which had eaten away at them for so long. Five years to let the anger and disappointment that had consumed them fade away. Five years to find comfort and solace in each other. Five years to create new memories.

‘Is everything to your satisfaction Mr. Caffrey?’ came the voice of the funeral home director. 

Neal turned to face the man. ‘Everything is perfect Mr. Burns. Thank you.’

‘If you need anything at all… our staff will be at the back of the room.’

Neal nodded a thank you and surveyed the chapel once more. The room had been set up with fifty or so chairs, filling most of the open space. At the back of the chapel was a table with the traditional keepsake bookmarks for the mourners - a photograph of the deceased with her date of birth and death as well as an inspirational quote. Cameron and Cody hovered nearby, chatting quietly as they prepared to greet the new arrivals. A few feet away, he spotted Hope, looking calm and poised as she chatted with her godparents.

At the front of the room stood a lectern as well as an easel on which a large photograph of Linda Bennett was displayed. The picture had been taken a short time after Neal had moved her to New York. Although frail, she’d looked happy, a sparkle evident in those blue eyes that were the mirror image of his own. A table sat next to the easel with a huge bouquet of white lilies and the copper urn he and Sara had chosen just days before. Dozens of flower arrangements had arrived throughout the day and lined the walls at the front of the chapel.

Neal’s eyes swept the room and came to rest on Sara. She stood, unruffled and self-assured in a gorgeous burgundy dress, her hair up in a soft chignon as she chatted with Sam and Lydia Jordan, the first mourners to arrive. His heart skipped a beat at the sight of her looking so composed, forever his anchor, the love of his life. 

He cleared his throat and adjusted his tie, making sure it was straight. He spotted Caitlin and Liam off in a corner speaking in hushed tones, no doubt going over their notes for the eulogy. He was grateful they’d agreed to say a few words about their grandmother. In the circumstances, it seemed right that the next generation get a chance to speak about her legacy. Strangely, it had been a relief not to have to do it. 

There’d been this quiet, intimate quality to his relationship with his mom, almost as if after years apart, they had selfishly agreed to keep the special bond they’d recaptured to themselves. He had no interest in speaking publicly about the pain they’d inflicted on each other in their early years or the joy they’d found as they made up for a lifetime apart. 

He felt a tightness in his chest. Although grief stricken, he could feel the love and support around him, providing comfort and giving him strength. He made his way to the front of the room, intent on making sure everything was as he’d requested. He fiddled with the large bouquet of flowers and let his hand linger on the urn for a moment before turning to face the photograph of his mom. He’d just lifted his hand to caress her cheek when he heard Sara’s voice behind him. 

‘Honey…’ she murmured. 

She pressed her lips to the back of his shoulder and he turned to face her.

‘Hey’ he smiled back.

‘People are starting to arrive' she said, slipping her hand in his.

He nodded and followed his wife to the back of the room to begin greeting their guests.

WCWCWC

‘So… you okay then?’ Liam asked.

Caitlin nodded. 

He was pleasantly surprised at how calm she seemed. Of all the grandkids, she’d been the one to spend the most time with Linda; he knew she had to be hurting.

‘If you feel like you can’t finish, just… just look at me and I’ll step in, okay?’

‘Thanks’ she said softly. 

‘I’ll be standing right behind you’ he added reassuringly. 

She glanced in the direction of her foster parents, then towards the photograph of Linda Bennett. 

‘I promised her I’d be strong.’

WCWCWC

In the end, more chairs had to be brought in to accommodate the growing number of mourners. About twenty minutes before the service began, people started pouring in. Hope, Liam and Caitlin joined their parents in the receiving line as guests arrived and paid their respects to the grieving family. Almost all the teachers from the school of art were in attendance as were a number of Sara’s colleagues from Sterling Bosch. Neal put on a brave face as he accepted condolences from Randall Piper who arrived and discretely took a seat towards the back of the room.

Neighbours and friends of the Caffreys as well as friends of Hope’s, Caitlin’s and Liam’s arrived as well as two of the residents from Blue Skies who’d befriended Linda. They were pushed in their wheelchairs by staff from the nursing home who also came in great numbers. Neal was pleasantly surprised to see two of the staff from the Amica Nursing Home in St. Louis. They had flown in just for the ceremony, intent on representing the staff and residents of the nursing home where Linda had lived for so many years. 

To Liam’s delight and surprise, Josh Monteith arrived with three of their Orange teammates. The guys had all piled into Trevon Williams’ old Ford Tempo and made the last minute decision to drive down for the day to support their teammate. 

As the room filled, so did Neal’s heart which no longer felt quite so empty. 

WCWCWC

The time came for the eulogy and Liam took Caitlin’s arm and led her to the front of the chapel. Sara’s hand slipped into Neal’s as he stared ahead, his breathing uneven.

Liam stepped up to the microphone and adjusted it to accommodate his six-foot-two frame. He took one last look around the room, cleared his throat and began speaking.

‘My parents and sisters and I would like to thank you for coming today’ he began with confidence. He took out some index cards from his jacket inside pocket and placed them on the lectern in front of him while Caitlin stood to one side.

‘I wanted to say a few words about my grandmother, Linda Bennett. Because of circumstances, we didn't get to know Grandma until about five years ago. She and my father had been estranged and she’d been living in St. Louis. But the truth is, she fit into our family like she’d always been there. The thing that struck me when I first met Grandma was the colour and intensity of her eyes. I felt like I was looking straight into my dad’s familiar baby blues. The resemblance was uncanny… not that I’m a believer in biology being destiny but the warmth in her eyes was so familiar it was as if I’d known her my whole life. When she moved to New York, we were able to see a whole lot more of her. Everyone could see how happy she was to be back in our lives, to have my dad back in her life. At least once a week, Dad and I would drive out to New Rochelle to pick her up for dinner at our house. She told me once, that it was the highlight of her week. Although we all visited her individually and Dad was over there several times a week, she said there was nothing like all of us being together in one room. That was Grandma, always excited about spending time with all of us. It was like she was trying to make up for all those years we’d been apart.’

From his seat in the first row, Neal smiled wistfully. He made a soft whimpering noise as he realized there would be no more visits to the house. He caught himself and cleared his throat, his gaze steady on his son. 

‘Dad was teaching me how to drive back then’ Liam continued with a chuckle. ‘…and I was always bugging him to let me drive. We’d get to the nursing home and Grandma would be sitting on the edge of her bed, all dressed up and ready to go with her purse on her lap, looking like a kid whose parents were taking her to Disneyland. That was one of the things I loved most about Grandma, she saw the joy and excitement in simple things. Maybe because her life had been so difficult, in later years, she had a deep appreciation for things many of us take for granted.’

Liam stopped talking for a moment and reached into his pocket, producing his lucky pebble. He held it up for everyone to see. ‘The last time I visited Grandma, I brought along my lucky pebble and after she fell asleep, I slipped it under her pillow for good luck. It was silly really, a throwback to my youth when I used to believe the pebble held special powers. I just wanted her to be… calm and serene. I didn't want her to suffer…’ 

His voice seemed to falter and Caitlin frowned, stepping in a little closer. Sara glanced at Neal, noticing a tear had escaped down his cheek. 

‘Grandma had a rough life’ Liam resumed, his composure returning. ‘But she never gave up and in the end, she managed to stand up to her demons and conquer them. She didn't have much money but she was rich in ways money can’t buy. She had courage, she had class. And she had integrity.’ 

He glanced over at her photograph. ‘And Grandma…’ he added cryptically, ‘…you know that thing we talked about? I just wanted you to know that you were right and everything’s going to work out just fine.’

He wiped a tear and winked at her photograph. ‘Rest in peace Grandma.’ 

There was an uneasy silence as everyone recovered from what Liam had just shared. He stepped away from the lectern and let Caitlin slip into the spot he’d just vacated. She was about to speak when Liam reached over and adjusted the microphone so she could be heard. She gave him a warm smile. 

‘My grandmother was one of the most amazing people I’ve ever known’ Caitlin began, her voice strong.

She looked out at the assembled group, her eyes lingering for a moment on her foster dad’s face.

‘The funny thing is that Mrs. Bennett wasn't really my grandmother. When I met her the first time, I was sixteen years old and she was an old lady. I didn't expect to have much in common with her. My foster parents had taken us all out to St. Louis to meet her for the first time. I went reluctantly. I had just moved in with the Caffreys and I was still figuring out exactly how I fit into the family. I remember the first time I asked if I could call her ‘Grandma’. Mr. C had flown out to St. Louis to bring her back for Thanksgiving. She was staying at our house and I remember sitting next to her on the couch in the family room. We were all really excited to have her visit and she’d promised to come and see some of my sculptures at the gallery. I looked at her and I asked her if I could call her ‘Grandma’. She smiled at me and said ‘Of course you can sweetheart.’ I remember it so vividly. It was the first time in my life someone had called me sweetheart.’

The room grew quiet.

‘Grandma had such quiet strength. She always appealed to the best in people. She never judged me and believe me I’m no saint, there was plenty she could have commented on over the years…’ she let her voice trail and some uneasy chuckling was heard in the room.

Neal felt Sara squeeze his hand and he squeezed back.

‘She… she…’ Caitlin appeared to falter and Liam, who up until this point had been standing discretely behind her, took a couple of steps forward and placed a reassuring hand on her back.

Caitlin swallowed and took a deep breath. ‘She had such a hard life. I think somewhere deep down she could see that I was struggling just like she had.’

She wiped her nose with the tissue she had tucked into her sleeve and continued without wavering. ‘I was lucky. I got a job at the Blue Skies Day Care and I got to see her before and after my shifts. Sometimes, she’d be waiting with a deck of cards or the scrabble board on her bed. We’d play for an hour or so but it was never about the game. We’d chat and laugh and sometimes she’d tell me stories about when she was a little girl and how she’d always dreamed of being a teacher.’

Neal turned to look at Sara and she noticed his bottom lip quivering slightly. 

‘Mostly Grandma was an amazing listener. She used to ask just the right question to get the ball rolling and then she’d sit back and listen to me blather on about school, my friends, my art, whatever it was that was on my mind… and believe me, I don’t have much of a filter.’

Again the room laughed, a little more easily this time.

‘She was all about letting me figure things out for myself. She would never lecture but she’d ask leading questions, helping me work through what was real and what was merely self-doubt. It’s funny, I always felt invincible when I was with Grandma. It was almost as if she was saying ‘of course, you’re smart, of course you’re competent, of course you can do whatever it is you want to do.’ 

‘It was that ‘of course’ that got me every time’ Caitlin said softly. ‘Like she was telling me something that was obvious but that I’d been blind to. After a while, I started to believe her. No one in my life had ever believed in me before… well, except for Mr. C’ she said, glancing in Neal’s direction. ‘He was the first one to tell me I had talent and that I could do whatever I wanted. I guess in the case of Grandma and Mr. C, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.’

Tears shone in Neal’s eyes, threatening to spill over.

Caitlin looked down at her notes, which she had barely checked since she’d started talking. ‘Anyway…’ she said, wiping her eyes and glancing over at the photograph of Linda. ‘Thank you Grandma… for believing in me. I know you’ll always be there for me, guiding me, and I promise… I promise to make you proud.’ 

She let out a sob, as if now that she’d finished what she’d set out to do, she could finally allow herself to fall apart. Liam squeezed her shoulder and together they returned to join the rest of the family.

WCWCWC

The Caffreys had hosted dozens of get-togethers in their home over the years. Most were happy occasions: holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, this one slightly more bittersweet than the rest. All the same, there was lively chatter and lots of food as people shared stories about Linda Bennett or listened in as those who’d been closest to her regaled everyone with tales about her life in St. Louis and at Blue Skies. 

‘Caitlin!’ Liam called out as she drew nearer. ‘These are some of the guys I play basketball with. This is my roomie Josh and this here is Trevon and Max but we call him Top Shelf.’

Caitlin giggled; it was easy to see where the seven foot man had gotten his nickname. The three men towered over the group. Will Allenby and a couple of Liam’s high school buddies stood nearby, dwarfed by the other men. At six-foot-two, Liam had always been considered on the tall side but he looked puny compared to his teammates. Cody hovered nearby, letting Liam take the lead. It hadn't escaped Caitlin that the two of them had been looking particularly cozy all day. 

Liam turned to face Josh. ‘Why didn't you tell me you were coming?’

‘Because I didn't know. We met up in the commons for breakfast and the idea snowballed from there. We thought you might appreciate the support.’

The tallest of the men, the one named Max, gave Josh a playful shove. ‘It’s all his fault’ he told Liam. ‘He wanted to meet your family and see if you kept your bedroom as messy as your dorm room.’

Josh looked at the two other men and shook his head in denial. 

‘That’s it!’ he replied playfully. ‘Tease me all you want but I’m calling shotgun for the ride home. There’s no way I’m squeezing into the backseat like I did this morning.’

There was more playful banter and some good natured ribbing. Neal stood nearby surveying the scene as he chatted with Mike Miller and Jeff Mason. 

He gave Mike a head nod in the direction of their sons. ‘I think Liam just gave us a scoop during his eulogy.’

Mike nodded, noticing Liam and Cody side by side; they’d been inseparable all day. 

‘I wondered about that’ he said with a nod. ‘Mindy’s going to be thrilled. She’s been trying to get those two back together forever.’

‘Get who back together?’ Mindy Miller asked as she and Sara joined the group.

Neal pointed to the boys. Cody had his hand on Liam’s back and they were standing close together. Very close together.

Mindy smiled. ‘I wondered if that’s what Liam meant when he said his grandmother had been right.’ 

Neal spotted the ladies who’d come all the way from St. Louis and excused himself to go say hi. He passed the large contingent from the June Ellington School of Art who were huddled together by the food on the kitchen counter.

‘Hey boss!’ Cindy Harrington called out as he sauntered past.

He slowed down to give her a hug. ‘Thanks for coming’ he said, continuing on his way.

Ever since the two women had arrived at the funeral home, Neal had been wracking his brain to try to remember their names. One of them, the younger of the two, had been a personal support worker and her name sprung instantly to mind: Heather something or other but the other woman’s name escaped him.

‘Ladies, thank you so much for coming all the way from St. Louis’ he said as he approached them.

‘Jenny and I are glad to be here. Everyone at Amica was very fond of your mother and they all send their love. Besides, we’re going to honour her memory by doing some shopping while we’re here.’

Jenny! Right. ‘Well, I appreciate you both taking the time to come. Mom had fond memories of her years at Amica.’

‘She was well loved Mr. Caffrey’ the older woman said.

Neal continued his walk through the house, making sure everyone had something to eat and thanking his guests for being there. He was secretly relieved to find that Randall Piper had left shortly after the ceremony, claiming to have to get back to the West Coast for a meeting. He momentarily set aside his unease at the prospect of having the multimillionaire in his modest home. Apparently, there were still some insecurities he was choosing to ignore.

Mozzie, his social phobia on full display, had popped into the service briefly but had disappeared the moment it was over. Otherwise, all the usual suspects were there: the Burkes, the Jordans, the Millers, the Masons, Clinton and Ivy, Diana and Christie, Myrtle and Charlie Stevens from next door. Friends of Liam’s, Caitlin’s and Hope’s were there as were a couple of the part-timers from the gallery. Cam’s parents had sent flowers and had called the night before to express their sympathy. 

There was no shortage of love in the room and despite the undercurrent of sadness on this day, Neal was grateful for the friends and family that surrounded him and Sara.

WCWCWC

‘Would you please stop apologizing’ Sara said.

She was lounging on the bed up in her room, rubbing her sore feet as she talked to her sister on the phone.

‘Neal and I understand. It’s not like Dublin is up the street.’

‘I know but… I wish I could have been there for you.’

‘Look Em, this trip of yours was planned months ago. Nobody expected you to cut it short and rush back, least of all Neal.’

‘So it went well?’

‘Yeah… it did’ Sara replied, reflecting on the events of the day. ‘There were a lot more people than we’d expected and we had everyone over after the funeral. Thank God El and her team took care of the food. I’m exhausted.’

‘How’s Neal coping?’

Sara peeked out the bedroom door to make sure Neal wasn't lurking nearby. ‘He’s doing all right, he managed to keep it together but I know he’s hurting.’

‘It’s not easy to lose your mom… at any age’ Emily reflected.

‘So, are you still planning on coming to New York for a few days on your way back?’

‘Yeah, try and stop me’ Em replied. ‘We can talk all things ‘wedding’ and start looking for a dress for you.’

‘Sounds great. So, your flight gets in on the 8th right?’

‘Yup. I’ll let you know if there are any changes.’

‘All right, we’ll talk later. Thanks for calling sis. Love you.’

‘Love you too’ came the reply from across the ocean.

Sara prepared to slip in between the sheets and stopped, wondering where Neal was. She hadn't seen him since he’d gone down to the studio earlier in the evening. She tiptoed downstairs in her bare feet, her robe pulled tightly around her. The main floor was dark except for the lone light over the stove - the one they always left on, day and night. She searched the open space and found Neal sitting alone in the dark in the family room, Raffie snoring beside him. Across from him, on the coffee table, sat the urn containing Linda’s ashes. As she got closer, she could see Neal staring at it, oblivious to her presence.

‘Hey’ she called out softly. A smile appeared on his lips and he lifted his arm up against the back of the couch, an invitation for her to join him.

‘I got into bed and… well, there was something missing so I came looking.’

Neal gave a soft chuckle and pulled her in to him, his arm snug around her shoulder. 

‘You all right?’ she murmured.

‘Uh huh’ he replied quietly. ‘I just… needed a minute or two before coming to bed.’

‘Your mom would have loved today Neal. It was a perfect reflection of who she was.’

He nodded. That’s all he’d wanted, really. To give his mother a dignified tribute, a proper goodbye. But still, the doubts lingered.

Sara picked up on the slight unease in her husband’s gaze. She had her suspicions about what was on his mind. 

‘Please don’t do that sweetie’ she said in response to his silence.

He turned to face her and frowned. ‘Don’t do what?’

‘Second guess yourself, wonder what could have been. Everything happens in its own good time Caffrey.’

‘You think?’

‘I do. Just focus on the time we had with her. You gave her a wonderful gift when you reached out to her.’

‘So did she’ he replied.

He let his head drop on her shoulder and she brought her hand up to caress his hair. It seemed to do the trick. She could feel him relaxing, letting go of those doubts that had been plaguing him. 

‘I know I’ve said it before but… thank you Repo’ Neal murmured.

‘For what?’

He sat up so he could look into her eyes. ‘For everything that’s good in my life… for having known better and going behind my back to find her.’

She shook her head, recalling the mammoth fight they’d had after she’d gone to visit Linda for the first time - against his wishes.

‘Even then, I knew I wouldn't be able to walk away from her. You forced me to face something I should have faced a long time ago.’

Sara brought her hands up to frame his face. ‘When we first got married…’ she said softly ‘… we promised to try to bring out the best in each other.’

‘That’s true, we did.’

‘That’s all I ever want Neal’ she continued. ‘I want to be the best I can be for you and I know you want that too.’ 

‘I know I don't alway show it but I’m glad you call me on all my crap’ he said, his voice quiet. 

She smiled and glanced at the table, the urn staring back at her.

‘You okay with having it here? For now?’

He nodded. ‘When the thaw comes, we can talk about planting that tree in the backyard and then we can…’

He stopped, feeling emotion rising in his chest. 

‘I’m tired’ he said instead.

Sara stood and reached out her hand to him. ‘Come on Caffrey. Let’s get you to bed.’

TBC


	65. Chapter 65

By the time the weekend rolled around, things had pretty well returned to normal in the Caffrey household. It had been almost a week since Linda passed away, the wounds left by her death not quite as raw and painful as they’d been a few days before. Neal had gone back to work as had both Sara and Caitlin. Cameron’s injury had healed enough to allow him to return to the gallery with Hope by his side and Liam, who’d stuck around for the remainder of the week, was preparing to return to Syracuse for a home game on Saturday night.

While in New York, he’d been spending every waking moment with Cody, stealing moments here and there as they rekindled their romance. Liam had even tagged along with him to Columbia and sat in on one of Cody’s classes - immunology of all things - just so they could spend a little more time together. When Cody introduced him to a couple of his classmates as his boyfriend, Liam beamed. They were finally back on track. 

On Friday morning, Neal was sitting at his desk at the June Ellington School of Art, preparing for a late day staff meeting when an unknown number popped up on his phone.

‘She just went inside’ came the muffled voice.

‘Moz? Is that you?’

‘She just drove up to the front of the house and some guy let her in.’

‘What are you talking about?’ Neal replied distractedly. 

Mozzie was unable to hide the excitement from his voice. ‘I followed Sara out to Southampton… to Piper’s summer residence. Neal, you should see this place, it’s incredible.’

Neal pulled his eyes away from the pile of papers on his desk, his attention suddenly focussed on the voice at the other end of the phone.

‘You followed Sara out to Southampton?’ he said with a touch of rebuke.

‘Yeah, isn't that what you wanted me to do?’

Neal hesitated for a moment, a pang of guilt deep in his gut. ‘No Moz! I told you, we’re not doing that anymore.’

‘Why not? This is where he said he was keeping his three ‘lesser known’ Pollocks. Aren’t you dying to know if he’s got the one you and the Suit are looking for?’

Neal remained silent, imagining Mozzie using air quotes as he spoke. 

‘How did you even get onto the property?’ he finally asked.

‘There’s a side road for deliveries and there’s plenty of tree cover. I’ve set up about fifty feet from the main house.’

‘The main house?’ Neal repeated with dread. 

‘Yeah, this is a huge property. There’s a large guest house, a pool house, an indoor/outdoor pool, stables, a tennis court and what looks like a golf course.’

Neal grumbled and stared out into space, trying to decide if he should chastise Mozzie or drive out and join him. He checked his watch: almost lunchtime. 

‘How long has she been in there?’ he finally asked.

He could hear Mozzie on the other end; it sounded like he was chomping on something.

‘About an hour’ the other man replied, his mouth full.

‘Are you… having lunch?’ Neal asked with a frown.

‘Yeah, I’ve set up in this really nice outdoor garden area not far from the main house. It’s got great cover and I’m getting amazing reception.’

Neal’s voice went up an octave. ‘Reception?’

‘Yeah, not so good on the visuals although I lucked out and I’ve got a decent sightline into what looks like the dining room. It sounds like they might be setting up shop there for the day.’

‘Moz, I told you not to put a bug on Sara’ Neal said in mock indignation. 

Silence.

‘So, what are they saying in there?’

‘Mostly, ‘nice to see you again’ ‘glad to be back at work’… you know that kind of stuff. By the way, Sara looks amazing in that new pink coat of hers.’

Neal rolled his eyes and sighed loudly. ‘It’s coral’ he replied, seemingly annoyed.

‘Well, it looks great on her’ Mozzie replied. ‘And it’s got a tiny little zipper on the inside for a key or… something small.’

Neal shook his head at Mozzie’s hubris… and genius. ‘Did she give him back the brooch?’

‘Yeah, first thing. He wanted her to keep it, said it was perfect on her but to her credit, Sara pushed back. They argued a bit but she held her own… you know, the way she can.’

Neal knew all too well how Sara could hold her own during an argument; he'd had more than his fair share of disagreements with the woman over the years. He scoffed, thinking about the trouble that little trinket had caused in their marriage and how it had almost cost Cam a whole lot more than a few bruised ribs. 

‘So, do you want me to abort?’ came Mozzie’s voice.

Neal wavered. It would be easy, so easy, to let it go, to just let Sara carry on with her job without him sticking his nose in but then again… it sure would be nice to have a look at what Piper had in his art collection. The odds were minuscule that he had a copy (or the original) of the Pollock he and Peter had been searching for. He was still stumped as to whether the one they’d seen at the Pruitt Gallery was the real thing - and Neal Caffrey hated being stumped. 

And then there was the matter of Sara Ellis, insurance investigator. How often did a loving, supportive husband get to observe his wife at work, see her in her element? That could be fun he argued, silencing the guilt pang that had begun to dissipate. 

‘Spy, Neal, spy! That’s what you're really doing’ the angel on his shoulder screamed in his ear.

‘Maybe stick around a little while longer, see if they get into the artwork…’ he replied, brushing his good angel aside with the flick of his wrist. ‘But Moz, whatever you do, DON’T get caught.’

He heard a loud scoff on the other end of the line. ‘Pulleeeeeze!’ Mozzie said with a smirk Neal could only well imagine.

‘And call me if you spot anything… suspicious’ Neal said, waving his hand in the air. ‘And try to get some good shots.’

‘Copy that’ came the reply.

Neal grimaced and shook his head at the antiquated expression. ‘All right, thanks Moz.’

He hung up and tried unsuccessfully to return to his planning. Like a kid who knew all too well he was eventually going to get caught, he momentarily struggled with conflicting emotions: overwhelming curiosity, petty jealousy, envy, shame and that all too familiar sense of elation at the thought of cracking a case. 

Playing around behind Sara’s back would not end well. 

And yet, he couldn't seem to help himself.

WCWCWC

‘How’s your dad doing?’ Peter asked, popping his head into the back room of the Raphael Gallery.

Hope looked up from where she stood, getting things ready for her seniors class, her latest brainchild - an attempt to diversify the gallery’s offerings.

‘He seems more settled. He went back to work this morning. I think it’ll do him good to keep his mind busy for the next little while.’

She glanced towards the front door of the gallery. ‘I was half expecting him to pop in today.’

Peter shrugged. ‘It was a really nice service. Linda would have liked it.’

‘I think so too’ Hope agreed as she thought of her grandmother.

Peter glanced over his shoulder to make sure Cam wasn't within earshot. ‘So… have you and Cam made up?’

Understandably, Hope had been annoyed at the unnecessary risk Cam had taken, landing himself in the trajectory of a bullet. ‘We didn't need to make up Uncle Peter. I was just upset he went and got himself hurt, that’s all.’

‘Well, if he starts talking about going into police work, make sure you steer him in a different direction’ Peter teased just as Cam appeared in his peripheral vision.

Hope immediately changed the subject. ‘I got a message to call Aunt Elizabeth. Do you know what that’s all about?’

Peter cringed; he hated getting dragged into his wife’s over the top event planning and he couldn't help but feel sorry for his goddaughter who was caught in the middle, walking that fine line between standing up for herself and not wanting to hurt her godmother’s feelings.

‘She’s… kind of taken over the dining room table with all kinds of samples of… stuff for your wedding’ he admitted sheepishly. 

He watched Hope’s face, her eyes growing, a fake smile appearing on her lips. He placed a loving hand on her shoulder and squeezed. ‘Honey, you need to tell her if it’s too much’ he chastised, realizing he was asking for the impossible.

Cameron interrupted, holding up his phone. ‘Guess what babe, my mom just called’ he announced with glee. ‘Becky’s arriving on Tuesday.’ 

‘That’s my sister’ he explained in response to Peter’s look of confusion. ‘She’s coming to help Hope plan the wedding.’

Hope smiled and wagged her eyebrows. ‘More help’ she mumbled under her breath.

She was glad for the extra pair of hands but there were already so many fingers in the pie. Between her aunt Elizabeth, her mom, Caitlin, Olivia and now her future sister-in-law, there was no shortage of opinions when all she wanted was a nice, simple wedding without complications.

Good luck with that she told herself.

WCWCWC

Dinner on Friday night turned into somewhat of a special occasion. Now that Cody and Liam had come clean to their families about being back together, it had become clear that everyone had been rooting for them for quite some time. 

A celebration was most definitely in order.

The Millers were invited to the impromptu get-together as was Will Allenby and of course, Liam’s godfather, his uncle Mozzie. Neal made his famous lasagna, his son’s favourite and set the table in the dining room in order to accommodate the large group that would be partaking of the feast.

It felt good to focus on something as basic as making dinner for the family and Neal dove in with fervour, eager to keep his mind occupied. Between the funeral and the reigniting of his nagging suspicions about Randall Piper, he needed to put his energy somewhere that was a little more productive.

He checked the time: it was almost six o’clock and except for Sara acknowledging his text about the get-together, he hadn’t heard from her all day. He imagined her and Randall Piper in his luxurious home, sharing a cocktail or two after a hard day’s work. He shook off the image, returning to the mundane task of making his son’s last night at home a memorable one.

He had just returned to whipping egg whites for his meringue when Hope and Cameron appeared, followed closely by Caitlin who was returning from her day’s work at the day care. Before long, Liam and Cody showed up, Mozzie hot on their heels. 

The two older men exchanged glances, Neal telegraphing his interest in finding out what had transpired down in Southampton. 

While Liam and Cody worked on preparing the ingredients for the Caesar salad and Hope and Cam tackled the garlic bread, Neal took advantage of a lull in the proceedings to drag Mozzie out to the garage, on a fabricated mission to grab a couple of cases of drinks.

‘Well?’ Neal asked, the moment they were alone.

Mozzie produced a letter sized envelope with a series of photographs - a little too grainy and out of focus for Neal’s liking.

‘That’s it?’ he said, sounding disappointed.

‘What did you expect Neal? Vacation shots? I had a terrible sightline… but I’ve got excellent audio’ he said, producing a flash drive and waving it in front of his best friend’s eyes.

Neal grabbed it from him a little too enthusiastically and stuffed into his shirt pocket. ‘Just… give me the highlights.’

‘They mostly inventoried the jewelry and some antique furniture. He was… friendly with her. Sara suggested they tackle his art collection next week.’

Neal seemed to focus on Mozzie’s second to last statement. ‘Friendly? How?’

‘You know…’ Mozzie replied, wishing he hadn't said what he’d just said. ‘Just… some reminiscing about their college days. A nice lunch… an offer to stay over if she wanted to get started early in the morning.’

He felt Neal bristle as he continued to peruse the stack of photographs. Mozzie had included some great shots of the overall estate, the grounds, the buildings and he heard Neal tsk tsk loudly as he glanced dismissively at them. 

‘The guy’s got a lot of nerve, I’ll give him that’ he grumbled as he stuffed the pictures back into the envelope and slipped them into his pocket.

Mozzie looked away. ‘Sara was very firm that she needed to get back home in time for dinner.’

‘Oh really’ Neal mumbled bitterly. ‘How… considerate of her.’

He frowned. ‘So, was there any mention of his art collection?’

‘Just in broad terms’ Mozzie said with hesitation, picking up on his best friend’s judgmental tone of voice. ‘He estimates he’s got between seventy-five and a hundred and twenty-five pieces throughout the house.’

Neal rolled his eyes at the extravagance; ironically, he was all too familiar with such opulence. For some strange reason, he flashed back to the residences he and Mozzie had secured in Cape Verde, lavish, palatial homes obtained by illicit means. At least this guy had made his fortune legally - or so Neal assumed. 

‘Thanks Moz’ he said reluctantly. ‘Do you mind sticking with it until we figure out exactly what he’s got.’

Mozzie nodded and brought his hand to rest on Neal’s shoulder. ‘Sure, if that’s any help. They’re calling for nice weather early next week so…’

He watched Neal skulk back into the house. Perhaps, contrary to popular wisdom, sometimes it was better not to know.

When they returned to the kitchen, Will had just arrived and was engaged in a lively discussion with Liam about exactly how much lemon juice was needed for the Caesar dressing. He’d had dozens of Italian meals at the Caffrey home over the years and he considered himself an expert on the ratio of lemon juice to olive oil.

Neal headed in their direction, eager to settle the argument and get his mind back in the game.

Liam lifted his hands up in exasperation as he watched his dad coming towards him. 

‘What?’ Neal asked with a frown.

‘I thought you were bringing in some drinks from the garage.’

Neal gave himself a tap on the forehead in a gesture of forgetfulness. ‘Oh yeah…’ he murmured absentmindedly as he prepared to head back where he’d just come from.

‘Never mind Dad, we’ll get them’ Liam said, winking at Cody and taking his arm.

Hope gave Cam a knowing look and let out a soft giggle as the two men headed out to the garage, looking just a little too pleased to have the opportunity of being out of everyone’s sight for a moment or two. 

‘Those two are about as subtle as a freight train’ she commented as Cam gave her a playful tap on the bum. ‘They just can’t keep their hands off each other.’ 

‘Kettle, meet pot’ Neal replied with a chuckle.

The moment the door to the garage closed behind them, Cody and Liam embraced as their mouths found each other and came together in a voracious kiss. They’d been at it pretty well constantly since Liam had come home and the thought of being apart, even temporarily, was already tugging at Liam’s heartstrings.

‘We’ve got to stop doing this every time we have more than five seconds alone’ he commented, happily clinging to Cody’s warm body.

Cody leaned in to place a sweet kiss on the other man’s lips. ‘Why? You’re leaving tomorrow… and I don’t want to waste a single minute.’

Liam gave in without argument. Who was he kidding? A little tongue wrestling was exactly what he’d had in mind when he’d dragged Cody out with him to the secluded garage. 

What began as gentle wayward touches and repeated nips and kisses began to morph into a more serious make-out session. There was heavy breathing and some soft moaning as their hands roamed, Liam beginning to unbutton Cody’s shirt despite the cool damp air of the unheated garage. 

‘I swear, if we weren’t having lasagna, I’d skip dinner altogether and drag you up to my room’ Liam whispered lewdly into his boyfriend’s ear.

Cody replied with a naughty chuckle as he continued nibbling at Liam’s ear. ‘Now there’s a turn on if I ever heard one’ he said mockingly. ‘So basically, what you’re telling me is that you love lasagna more than you love me.’

Liam gave him a sweet smile and a small playful shrug. ‘Not just any lasagna babe… only my dad’s lasagna.’

The groping continued for a few minutes, their bodies beginning to stir in response to the other man’s touch. They had begun to remove each other’s shirt when the familiar rumbling sound of the garage door opener caught them off guard. They froze, their gaze turning in the direction of the garage door as it slowly opened, revealing Sara sitting behind the wheel of the family SUV. She smiled back at them through the large opening, giving them an amused wave as they attempted to pull apart with the little bit of dignity they had left, tucking their shirts back in precipitously and adjusting their pants.

Liam waved back meekly and Cody looked away, embarrassed; there was nothing quite like having your folks - or worse yet, your boyfriend’s folks - walking in on you while you were making out. 

They opened the connecting door to the house and had disappeared inside before Sara had even stepped out of the car.

Neal spied them returning empty handed and he raised his hands, mimicking Liam’s earlier gesture. ‘Where are the drinks?’

‘Mom’s home’ Liam announced, hoping for a successful distraction.

Neal’s ears perked up. He was eager to get Sara’s take on her day, something which, sadly, would have to wait until they were alone. Instead, he returned to assembling his signature lemon meringue pie as the door opened and Sara appeared looking hot as all hell in that new coat of hers, her long legs perched on top of those spindly stiletto heels that defied gravity. Neal noticed she had an extra glow and he dared to hope he was the one putting the colour in her cheeks and not some ex-boyfriend back in Southampton.

Before he could say anything, there came a knock at the front door. 

The Millers were arriving, expecting to be fed.

WCWCWC

‘I ate too much’ Sara groaned as she changed into her usual sleepwear, a t-shirt and a pair of yoga pants.

Neal studied her carefully. She seemed a little more cheerful than usual, a little too cheerful. Was her mood compliments of Randall Piper? Or was it his own irresistible charm having its usual effect on her?

‘You’re in a good mood’ he said in an attempt to get her to open up. ‘I take it things went well at Piper’s estate.’

Sara slipped into bed next to him and faced him, eyes fluttering. ‘It was okay… it’s just work, Neal.’

She ran her hand across his naked chest, inviting him to lie down so she could curl up against him.

‘Tonight was fun, wasn't it?’ she asked rhetorically. ‘You know I think you outdid yourself, your lasagna was the best it’s ever been… and your pie was out of this world. Even Mindy asked for a second piece.’

‘Uh huh’ Neal said, not quite paying attention.

He let her settle in his arms and began lazily running his hand up and down her arm, his nose settling in her soft, fragrant hair. He inhaled deeply, enjoying the familiar scent of her shampoo, nuzzling in her gentle, luxurious curls. He took another deep breath, letting it out with a satisfied sigh.

‘It was nice to have the Millers over, wasn't it?’ Sara continued, obviously in a chatty mood. ‘We haven't had them over for dinner in ages.’

He nodded. ‘It was a little tricky with the boys apart but… having them back together is nice.’

Sara chuckled and Neal pulled away to get a better look at her face. 

‘I found them making out in the garage when I pulled in’ she confessed with a giggle. 

‘Who? The Millers?’ Neal asked with a wide grin.

‘No silly, Liam and Cody’ she said, slapping his chest playfully. ‘You should have seen their faces, Cody wouldn't even look me in the eye.’

‘They do look happy, don’t they’ Neal agreed. ‘If Liam’s happy, I’m happy.’

She looked up at him and smiled. ‘And it looks like Cam’s pretty well healed up.’

Neal nodded. ‘Thank God for that!’

‘Hope seems to have forgiven him for his little escapade.’ Her mind seemed to wander. ‘What did you think about her suggestion?’

‘What? You mean about us taking a trip next summer for our twenty-fifth wedding anniversary?’

‘Yeah, we’ve always wanted to go to Europe. Maybe Paris… the city of loooove’ she cooed. ‘We’ve never been there together.’

‘Paris, huh?’

‘You could teach me some French’ she said, letting her hand wander lustfully over his chest and playfully pinching his nipple. ‘I mean something other than ’voulez-vous coucher avec moi’.

Neal purred, placing a kiss on the top of her head; her accent was the worst he’d ever heard but nonetheless endearing. ‘Je veux toujours coucher avec toi, mon amour’ he murmured.

‘Huh?’ Sara said with a frown. ‘I don’t know what you said but it sounds sexy as hell Caffrey.’

‘Everything sounds sexy in French, even ‘pass the salt’ he said as he leaned down and placed a lingering kiss on her lips. He could see she was distracted.

‘Have you and Mozzie got something going on?’ she asked, frowning. Not exactly the reaction he'd been hoping for.

‘Why?’ he replied, neither confirming nor denying.

‘I don’t know, just the way you two were looking at each other through dinner, like there was a secret you didn’t want anyone to know about.’

Neal shrugged and pulled her in to him. ‘You know Mozzie, he’s always got something going on.’

They lay in silence for a moment, Neal eager to draw out more information about Randall Piper and his summer villa.

‘Speaking of secrets, you looked like the cat who swallowed the canary all night long. What was that all about?’

She let out a soft moan and let her lips linger on his chest. ‘I’m just… happy we were all together before Liam heads back upstate, that’s all.’

‘Oh yeah?’ Neal prodded. He squeezed her shoulder. ‘So, tell me, what’s Piper’s place like.’

Sara took a moment to ponder her answer. She’d been impressed, there was no doubt about it but she didn't want to gush, that would only make Neal feel insecure. And after the episode with the cameo brooch, she wasn't going back down that road again.

‘Oh you know, those places along the coast are all the same.’

‘What? A pool, a tennis court, horses?’ Neal said.

If she only knew how intimately he was already acquainted with the man’s estate.

‘Yeah… that’s about it’ she said with a smile. ‘How come you’re so interested in Randy’s summer home?’

He cringed at her use of his first name. Abbreviated at that. ‘Oh, you know… just plain old curiosity’ he lied. ‘What’s his art collection like?’

‘We haven't gotten around to it yet. We mostly did antiques today and some of his jewelry.’

‘What did he say when you returned the brooch?’

Of course he knew exactly what he’d said. While Sara had been busy chatting with Hope and Mindy Miller, he’d slipped away to listen to some of the audio Mozzie had recorded. 

‘It was fine’ she said, playing it down. ‘I just told him I didn't feel comfortable keeping it.’

‘He didn't give you a hard time?’

‘Why would he?’ she said dismissively. ‘Neal, what’s up with you anyway?’

‘Nothing’ he lied. ‘I’m just… I’m just glad that whole nasty episode is behind us.’

Unexpectedly, she sat up, facing him. He’d been through a rough few weeks and she was looking forward to putting a smile back on his face. 

‘I’ve got a surprise for you’ she said gleefully. ‘I was going to wait to tell you but… I can’t!’

‘A surprise? What kind of surprise?’

Sara sprung to her feet and ran to get her purse, pulling out a few sheets of paper and settling back into bed next to him. She was practically jumping up and down like a little kid and Neal couldn't help but smile at the sight of her, usually so calm and collected.

‘I got us a weekend getaway’ she blurted out, practically throwing the papers onto his lap.

‘What?’

‘I was driving by this place on the way to Randy’s house’ she said pointing excitedly to the piece of paper in his hands. ‘Honey, look at this place, it’s amazing. There’s a spa, a five star restaurant and look at the rooms.’

‘Babe, this looks really expensive —’

Sara cut him off. ‘It is but… I got a bonus for landing the Piper account and I can’t think of a better way to spend it.’

Neal looked over the pictures of the resort, the Topping Rose House. It really did look incredible - even by his exacting standards.

Sara kept staring at his face, waiting for a reaction. She was smiling widely and Neal couldn't help but find her almost childlike excitement contagious. 

‘Honey, it’s been such a rough few weeks, we deserve this’ she said.

Neal’s smile widened as he nodded. ‘It looks great Repo’ he said soberly.

She threw her arms around his neck and squeezed tightly, catching him off balance. Neal fell onto his back, Sara landing on top of him. She ran her hands through his hair, gloating openly as he grinned back at the sight of her so happy.

‘We can have hot oil massages, pedicures, we can sleep in and order room service, go out to dinner, finally have some alone time’ she cooed, leaning down to nibble at his ear.

‘Mmmm. Alone time…’ Neal repeated, his voice growing rough. He ran his hand through her hair, pressing her against him. ‘Now, what would we do with alone time?’

She lingered on his mouth, nipping at his bottom lip as he growled. 

‘How do you say ‘pass the salt’?’ she murmured flirtatiously in his ear.

‘Why Sara Ellis, are you trying to seduce me?’

‘That depends’ she said langorously. ‘Is it working?’

He wagged his eyebrows, his lips curled in a playful smirk. 

‘Le sel, s’il vous plait’ he whispered seductively before pulling her in for a long lingering kiss, their tongues twinning as she shuddered. 

That, it turned out, was the only response she needed.

TBC


	66. Chapter 66

‘You know I really don’t know what I’m doing here’ Neal said, wringing his hands anxiously. 

Jim McDougall sat across from him, watching and listening.

‘Last week, when I dropped by, I was really on edge but now I’m feeling a lot better. As a matter of fact, I almost cancelled today’ Neal admitted sheepishly.

‘No harm in checking in’ the addictions counsellor said with a warm smile.

Neal seemed to relax and nodded. ‘We buried my mom last week and…’

Jim leaned in and patted Neal’s knee with his large football player hand. ‘I’m sorry, I didn't know.’

Neal shrugged and forced another smile. ‘It was… okay. I… I wasn't sure how I’d manage but it was… okay.’

‘Tell me what was happening when you popped in to see me last week.’

‘There was just a lot going on. We were getting ready for the funeral and we were dealing with some issues with Caitlin and her brother. I was feeling… a little out of control.’

‘Have you had any more situations like the one you had at the diner a while back?’

‘No, nothing like that. It’s been good. Sara… well, she’s there for me to bounce things off of and she helps keep me centred.’

‘So, no secrets between you, then?’ Jim asked.

‘Not about this, no’ Neal replied rather cryptically.

As an addictions counsellor, Jim McDougall had long ago learned that his job consisted mostly of listening, letting his clients vent or share whatever was on their mind. The secret was to keep your mouth shut during those long, awkward silences, not to push things. Predictably, after a few moments of silence, Neal spoke up again.

‘The wedding’s coming up soon’ he said.

‘That’s right, your daughter’s getting married’ the man echoed.

The topic seemed to bring on a look of concern on his client’s face so he waited for an explanation.

‘There’s going to be a champagne toast after the ceremony and there’ll be lots of people there who don’t know me very well. Like my son-in-law’s family. It’s always tricky… I feel like people notice right away that I’m not having a drink like everybody else.’

Jim nodded. ‘It might feel that way but most times, people are just focussed on themselves, they’re not really watching the people around them or what they’re doing.’

As a conman, Neal had always made it his business to observe people very carefully, scrutinizing their every move, figuring out what made them tick. He conceded the point that not everyone was as observant as he’d had to be in his former profession. 

‘So tell me, how are you doing with those strategies we discussed?’ Jim asked. ‘You know, having a non-alcoholic beverage in the same kind of glass as everyone else, trying to keep busy, finding something else to focus on?’

‘It’s fine when we’re home. If we have people over, I just have a glass like everybody else and no one’s the wiser. But we’re going to be in a hall or maybe a restaurant. It’s going to be more obvious to everyone that I’m not having a drink.’

‘Does that bother you?’ Jim prodded.

Neal shrugged; he was still a very proud man. ‘I don’t like to draw attention to it or have to explain it.’

‘That’s understandable. But you know, it’s nobody’s business whether you drink or not, you don’t owe anyone an explanation.’

The men just looked at each other in silence. 

‘Have you given any thought to having one drink, maybe just the toast. Like we discussed, planning ahead, making sure you’re clear headed and in control, maybe asking your wife for some help.’

This time it was Neal who grew quiet.

‘It’s been what Neal, four years?’

‘Almost’ Neal replied.

‘You know, we’ve talked about this. You have options here. The reason you abused alcohol four years ago was very specific to a horrible situation you were going through. It was a coping mechanism but now, you’ve proven that you can deal with difficult situations without having a drink. It’s very likely that you could learn to drink socially again without abusing —’

‘But what if… what if I can’t cope? I can’t take that chance Jim. I almost lost everything the last time, my family, my job…’

‘Neal, the decision is entirely up to you, it always will be. I’m just explaining your options here. Many people are able to drink again socially, it depends on the individual, how long they were abusing, what the circumstances were. In my case, I found out the hard way that I can’t control myself so I abstain. But many people can.’

Neal shrugged and looked way. 

Jim continued. ‘Like I said, you could try a dry run - no pun intended’ he said with a smirk. ‘You could talk it over with Sara, ask her to have your back, to make sure things don’t escalate. If you decide to try, you should plan on having one drink in a controlled setting, preferably at home where you feel safe. Do it with people you trust and who know about your situation. Ask for their help and see how you feel afterwards. You’ll know the signs, that’s for sure. Then, if all goes well, you might feel more confident about the possibility of toasting your daughter at her wedding.’

Neal’s eyes grew distant and his breathing uneven. ‘I think I’d like to be able to do that.’

Jim smiled. ‘Okay. Then, pick a time to do it. I suggest you do it as part of a social gathering, preferably a meal. I know you used to enjoy wine with dinner. Don’t drink alone though, that’s a red flag.’

Neal nodded.

‘Stay away from scotch since that was your poison of choice; it might trigger something. Just plan ahead and tell everyone at the table what you’re doing. Choose a wine you really enjoy and pour yourself a regular glass, four, five ounces and sit back and savour it… for it’s taste, it’s aroma, the pleasure you have in sharing it with people.’

Neal let out a breath he hadn't realized he’d been holding. ‘That sounds good’ he said.

‘And then, come back and see me and we’ll talk it through, see how you’re feeling. If you decide you’re ready, we can plan on how to handle things at your daughter’s wedding.’ 

There was a look of apprehension on Neal’s face, or maybe it was just plain fear.

‘Neal, the key is to have a drink mindfully, with a clear mind and not to do it on the spur of the moment. Being spontaneous can lead to trouble.’ 

Neal stood and prepared to leave. Jim got to his feet and the men shook hands.

‘Remember’ the counsellor said. ‘There’s no right or wrong here. Just be honest with yourself about how you’re feeling.’

WCWCWC

Sara’s first thought when she woke on Tuesday morning was of Randall Piper. She’d been working with him for a couple of weeks now and ever since she’d returned from her few days off, she’d begun to feel slightly uneasy around him. 

At first, it had been great spending time with her ex-boyfriend, reminiscing about their university days as they worked. She’d been enjoying his company, the way he doted on her, all those special little attentions. But ever since they’d begun working out of his place in Southampton, she’d started to feel uncomfortable. For one thing, his property was isolated and except for one other person, Randy’s trusty butler/cook, they were alone in the house for hours on end. What had begun as friendly and professional discourse seemed to be evolving into more intimate discussions and increasingly personal conversations. 

Every day when she arrived at his sprawling mansion, Randy would have a big breakfast laid out for her - even though she’d told him repeatedly she didn't eat much in the morning. He usually followed that up with a copious lunch featuring some of her favourite foods and always a bottle of fine wine. While they ate, their chats would inevitably turn to their shared past, about how happy and carefree they’d been back in the day, about what might have been if life hadn't intervened. 

But more worrisome, she’d noticed that Randall had taken to reminiscing about their more intimate moments. He’d comment on those lazy mornings they’d spent curled up on her tiny dorm room bed, the skipped classes while they made love for hours on end. It was beginning to feel uncomfortable and on more than one occasion, Sara had tried to steer the conversation back to the work they were there to accomplish. It might have been her imagination but she’d begun to notice that there were more and more wayward touches and warm smiles, the odd wink as if they shared some secret no one else knew about. Although he hadn't said or done anything that went over the line, she’d begun to fear he might. It was all a little too cozy and Sara was feeling awkward about the intimacy that seemed to be developing between the two of them.

To top it off, she knew things were really piling up back at the office and that there would be a stack of new cases to deal with when she finally got back. Lydia had assured her she had things well under control and her boss, Winston Bosch, had made it clear that, at least for the time being, he wanted Sara to concentrate on the Piper account. He wanted her to give their newest, most elite client the royal treatment and that meant Sara had to see this through to the very end as per Randy’s request that she handle things personally.

A late winter snowfall on the day before had him urging her to stay the night and probably, if it had been any other client, Sara would have agreed. The road conditions were anything but ideal but despite the long drive ahead, she’d stood firm, insisting on facing the long road home. 

The drive back to White Plains had taken twice as long as usual and she’d white knuckled it all the way. When she’d finally stepped into the house, she’d been thrilled to find Neal standing barefoot in their kitchen, putting together a late dinner for her in a wife beater and a pair of paint splattered sweat pants. 

She’d thrown her arms around him and hugged him tight, Neal pleasantly surprised at what seemed like an over the top reaction to making it home. 

‘I should wear my paint garb more often if this is the reaction I’m gonna get’ he'd quipped as she hung on to him.

The truth was there was no place like Neal’s warm, welcoming arms after a long day of work. She’d fallen short of sharing her apprehensions about her ex-paramour with him. Neal worried about her enough as it was and knowing she was having trepidations about her star client would likely rekindle those feelings of insecurity he’d been fighting to shake. She could handle it, she told herself, as long as she had Neal to come home to.

She turned in bed to find him splayed out on his back, snoring softly and she snuggled up against his warm, sleep filled body. He moaned at the sensation and stirred just long enough to wrap his arm around her and pull her into his chest, squeezing her shoulder as he sighed.

The alarm would be going off in another few minutes, breaking the mood and sending her back to Southampton for another day of walking the tightrope with Randall Piper, something that had Sara growing increasingly apprehensive.

‘Neal’ she murmured.

‘Mmmmm’ came the response.

‘What do you say we go on that weekend getaway this weekend?’

‘Neal?’ she repeated in response to the silence coming from his side of the bed.

‘What? Yeah, sure… whatever babe’ he replied, still half asleep.

A nice weekend together to recalibrate things, that was exactly what Sara needed.

WCWCWC

‘It’s me!’ Hope called out cheerfully as she opened the door to Cam’s apartment. 

It was still dark inside, the curtains drawn and she could see a lump under the blanket on the living room couch, stirring ever so slightly in response to her voice.

Becky Armstrong sat up and scratched her head as she looked around the room, momentarily forgetting where she was.

‘Ugh!’ she cried out as she let herself fall back on the pillow. She took the blanket and pulled it up to cover her face as Hope made her way to the window and pulled the drapes back, letting in the sun.

Cam appeared in the doorway to the bedroom they often shared. He was scratching his privates, his eyes bleary, his hair sticking out every which way - quite the stud. If she hadn't already fallen for him, this look would definitely do it for her. 

‘Babe… what are you doing here so early?’ he asked groggily.

‘I’ve been calling you guys for the past hour’ she complained, picking up Cam’s phone and glancing at the screen. ‘It helps to turn the damn thing on’ she added.

‘It’s almost noon’ she shouted over her shoulder as she made her way to the kitchen to put the kettle on.

Although Becky Armstrong was no impressionable teenager, the couple had decided Hope would sleep at home for the week. One of the first questions out of Bonnie Armstrong’s mouth when her daughter eventually returned to the old homestead would undoubtedly be about sleeping arrangements. Neither Hope nor Cam wanted to put the young woman in the awkward position of having to lie to her mother.

‘We got in late…’ Cameron moaned and he made his way to stand behind Hope by the stove. ‘…really late.’

He wrapped his arms around her, propping his chin on top of her thick wavy hair and reaching for her breast with one hand while slipping the other around her waist and squeezing.

She slapped him playfully and gave a head nod in the direction of the living room where Becky was starting to move around.

‘What?’ Cam murmured in her ear. ‘I’m badly in need here babe, it’s been four nights.’

Hope shushed him and smiled as Becky stepped into the kitchen, looking like death warmed over.

‘What the hell did you two do last night anyway’ Hope asked.

Becky walked to the fridge and stared blankly inside. ‘Cam took me to a show and then we went out for a drink.’

Hope stared, disbelieving.

‘All right, a few drinks’ the other woman admitted.

‘I thought we were going out to look at some dresses today.’

‘Yeah, yeah’ came Becky’s rough voice. She was holding her head as if it might explode if she didn’t. ‘Just give me a minute to jump in the shower.’

She turned and walked away, dragging her feet as she headed to the bathroom, leaving the couple alone.

‘Cam, what are you trying to do, corrupt your little sister?’ Hope asked over her shoulder.

He gave her the evil eye, taking advantage of the fact that they were finally alone to slip his hand back onto her breast and squeezing as he buried his face in her hair.

‘She’s not a kid anymore’ he reminded her as he groaned. ‘Do you think we have time for a quickie while she’s in the bathroom?’

Hope giggled and moved away. ‘You look like hell’ she said as he leaned in to kiss her. 

She covered his mouth and grimaced. ‘And your breath smells like shit.’

He groaned. In disappointment this time.

‘I’m going back to bed’ he pouted. ‘Feel free to join me if you come to your senses.’

She watched him waddle off, his boxers practically slipping off his skinny white ass. Yup, that was him, the guy she loved more than she could ever have imagined, the guy who’d recently been prepared to take a bullet for her, the man with whom she couldn't wait to join her destiny in just a few short weeks. 

‘In your dreams’ she called out after him.

WCWCWC

The sight that greeted Neal when he peeked through the thick tree cover was, by anyone’s standard, way over the top. Mozzie had settled in comfortably as if he’d been invited to move onto the Piper property permanently. In the clearing was a water fountain surrounded by four wrought iron benches, two of which Mozzie had commandeered. He was wearing large headphones and was munching enthusiastically on what appeared to be a pastrami sandwich on rye with a side of potato salad. In his other hand was a crystal goblet. A blanket lay on his lap.

Next to him sat a picnic basket with an open bottle of Chablis, some strawberries and a couple of plastic containers containing other elements of his elaborate meal. On the second bench, Mozzie had set up his equipment, a parabolic listening device - a backup in case the bug he’d planted on Sara failed in some way - a camera with a large assortment of lenses as well as two pairs of binoculars and at least four burner phones. Considering two of the benches still had traces of snow on them, Neal’s keen sense of observation told him that the small hand broom that sat next to the picnic basket had been used to clean off the two benches Moz was presently occupying. 

It was a warm late winter day, the sun growing in strength and Mozzie’s wide brim canvass hat had been set aside, allowing him to sun his delicate scalp as he worked. A scarf was loosely wrapped around his neck and hung on his chest. As he got nearer, Neal could hear the soft voice of Edith Piaf coming from a transistor radio despite the fact that Moz had headphones firmly placed on his head. 

One thing was for sure, you couldn’t accuse the guy of travelling light. Making a quick getaway would be completely out of the question.

‘Moz!’ Neal called out as he stepped into the clearing. 

Mozzie’s eyes grew in surprise at the sight of his best friend standing there carrying a large bag from Taco Bell.

‘Neal! What are you doing here?’ he asked, pulling off the earphones.

‘I thought I’d bring you by some lunch’ Neal replied, holding the bag up to eye level. He pointed to the elaborate meal Mozzie was munching on. ‘But from what I see, you’re way ahead of me.’

‘You drove all the way out here to bring me lunch?’ Mozzie asked, incredulous.

‘Yeah’ Neal said with a conman smile. ‘I figured you’ve been doing so much recon for me, I owed you at least that much.’

He pushed the equipment off to one side and sat on the bench, kitty corner to Mozzie and opened the bag on his lap to remove its contents. 

‘Now that I’ve seen the feast you brought along, this dairy free chimichanga is looking pretty skimpy.’

Mozzie shrugged. ‘I figured if I’m going to spend several hours out here… observing, I might as well make myself at home.’

‘You’re not worried someone will find your little… hideaway.’

Mozzie bit into his sandwich and shook his head. ‘There’s only one staff in there with the lovebirds and Piper’s got him preparing meals and fetching tea. I think I’m safe.’

Neal cringed at the description of his wife and Randall Piper as ‘lovebirds’. 

‘So… any sign of the Pollocks?’

Mozzie’s face grew animated. ‘I think we’re getting close. They finally started the inventory of the art and they’ve already logged in about fifty pieces. They’re up in the bedroom right now getting a few more.’

Neal looked on, disappointed. The bug Mozzie had planted was in the lining of Sara’s coat which by all indications was not in the bedroom. He ripped off the wrapper on a vegetarian burrito and took a bite.

‘So, what’s the matter?’ Mozzie asked. ‘You didn't think I could handle this little mission on my own?

‘No… of course not. I just thought you’d like a little company. My afternoon opened up at the last minute and it’s a beautiful day. I thought I’d take a little drive out here and see for myself.’

Mozzie raised his eyebrows and gave them a wag. ‘Seriously Neal? You expect me to believe you came all the way out here to drop off a chimichanga and an order of tepid fries?’

‘Moz, you wound me’ Neal said, hand to his chest. ‘I came here just for you and you’re making it all sound so… calculated.’

He glanced around the expansive gardens nearby. The place was impressive by anyone’s standards; acres of space and, as Mozzie had described, a large guest house, a pool and a tennis court. From where he sat, he had a decent sightline into one of the windows of the mansion. He grabbed for one of the binoculars and pointed them in that direction.

‘So what’s been going on in there?’ he asked.

Mozzie took a sip of wine and swallowed. ‘They’re examining stuff one piece at a time. Piper gives Sara a quick rundown about provenance and how much he paid and she looks it up on her master list and assigns it a value.’

‘Sounds… riveting’ Neal quipped. ‘What about the two of them… I mean how do they sound? What’s he like with her? I mean, is he… flirty?’

‘Flirty?’ Mozzie repeated, his voice dripping with sarcasm. He brought his voice up two octaves and batted his eyelashes. ‘Gee, I don’t know Jan but he’s sooooo cute.’

Neal frowned, his insecurities getting the better of him. ‘I’m serious Moz. Has he been hitting on her?’

Mozzie took one hand off his sandwich and threw the headset in Neal’s direction. ‘Listen for yourself.’

He didn't want to have to relay the gibberish he’d been subjected to all morning. He didn't want to read too much into it but he’d been picking up on some weird vibe from Piper all morning. Maybe Neal’s instincts had been right all along.

Neal placed the headphones on his ears and brought the binoculars up to his face pointed in the direction of the house, willing the occupants to step closer to Sara’s gorgeous new coral coat.

WCWCWC

Randall Piper had placed a dozen or so small canvasses on the large king size bed in his bedroom suite. Sara stood back and examined them, her eyes moving from one to the next.

‘Is that a Chagall?’ she asked, her face animated as she pointed to a small portrait by the head of the bed.

He stood behind her, a little closer than was comfortable - at least as far as she was concerned.

‘I bought it at auction in Paris about eight years ago’ he said, so close she could feel his breath on her neck. 

He took another step forward and suddenly she could feel his body against her back, crowding her up against the edge of the bed. As far as unwanted advances were concerned, Sara Ellis could certainly fend for herself but turning around and kneeing him in the groin seemed like overkill in this particular situation. She needed to find a way to pull away without destroying his ego - or their relationship. And she needed to do it without losing his patronage.

She turned to look into his eyes and kept her face serious as she spoke. 

‘Randy, what’s going on here?’ she asked, her hand rising to rest on his chest in an effort to create some space between them.

His hands moved to rest on her hips. ‘Sara…’ he began, his voice rough. ‘I’ve really enjoyed spending time with you these last few weeks.’

She sighed. ‘So have I Randy’ she said, finally managing to take a step to the side. ‘I’ve enjoyed working with you.’ 

His hands remained on her hips, one hand moving to caress her hair.

He sighed. ‘I’ve been wanting to do that for weeks now.’ 

He was just about to lean in and kiss her when Sara gave a gentle push against his chest and extricated herself from his arms.

‘Randy, I’m married’ she said as if that was all the explanation he should need.

‘So?’ he replied as he followed her and took her arm, forcing her to look at him. ‘A lot of people are married Sara. I’m not asking you to leave your husband.’

Her face tightened in disappointment at what he’d just said. She’d hoped it wouldn't come to this.

‘That’s not… the kind of marriage Neal and I have. We don’t… see other people.’

‘Sara, I’m not just anybody. You and I loved each other once.’

‘We did’ she admitted. ‘But that was a long time ago.’

‘I’m just asking for a little stroll down memory lane. No one needs to know. Surely, we owe each other that much’ he insisted.

She took another step away from him, slow yet confident and walked towards the bedroom door. Perhaps the best course of action was to ignore what had just happened.

‘Do you want to bring those down to the dining room’ she said over her shoulder. ‘The lighting is better down there.’ 

WCWCWC

The two men sat in silence, the sun beaming down on them. Luckily, the weather had warmed up significantly, making it quite pleasant to be sitting out despite the fact spring had yet to descend upon the Hamptons. The parabolic listening device, aimed towards the house, was capturing very little sound - sadly, those things didn't do much through windows. Neal and Mozzie were left to watch and listen, waiting for the occupants of the house to get within range of the bug Mozzie had so craftily planted in Sara’s coat. 

There was a soft rustling sound and Neal picked up the binoculars, pointing them in the direction of the main house. Sara appeared in his sights and made her way to the dining room table. Neal couldn't help but notice how sullen she looked, no sign of her usually bubbly personality. She appeared to be alone and she settled at the dining room table and began to make notes. Neal frowned and surveyed the rest of the room. Where was Piper? 

WCWCWC

Sara was busy scribbling down some notes when Randall reappeared with an armload of framed artwork. He placed the canvasses on the large dining room table and sat across from her in silence. When she finally looked up, he spoke.

‘I’m sorry… about what happened upstairs. I thought we were… on the same page.’

Sara looked at him, her face serious. ‘I’m sorry too… if I gave you the impression I was interested in having a… fling.’

‘Have I been reading the signals wrong?’ he asked, genuinely perplexed. ‘I thought we were getting closer.’

‘Randy, what we had back then… it was real. It was great. But I was twenty-two years old and there was nothing to stop me from… being with you. My life is totally different now. I’m not that kid anymore. I’m married to an amazing man and I love him very much. We’ve built a life together and I would never do anything to jeopardize what we have.’

‘That’s just it’ he replied with a naughty smile. ‘None of that has to change. Like I said, I’m not asking you to leave your husband and come live with me. Although to be honest, I probably wouldn't say no to that. It’s just… being around you these past few weeks reminds me of how wonderful things used to be between us. We were good, weren’t we?’

He was on his feet again, moving closer to her. Randall Piper had made his millions based on the premise that if at first someone gave you a ‘no’, it was simply an invitation for you to try a little harder.

He perched himself on the edge of the table facing her while she grew visibly uncomfortable. He moved to touch her hair again, running his hand through her red tresses and settling his hand behind her neck, cradling her head as he pulled her towards him.

Sara resisted. ‘Randy, stop. Please. I don’t want to have to bring our work relationship to an end but I’m going to have to if you don’t stop.’

‘Sara, where did you think this was going exactly? We’ve been dancing around each other for weeks now, we both know this moment was inevitable. There’s electricity in the air every time we’re together.’

She stared back, keeping her body tightly coiled, making sure he didn't have space to get any closer. 

‘I’ve been wanting to kiss you since I first saw you weeks ago’ he murmured, leaning in. 

She turned her head, avoiding his lips. ‘Randy, please don’t do this.’

He pulled away slightly, leaving his hands buried in her hair. ‘You know you’re even more beautiful than you were back when we first met.’

Sara sighed; she needed to tread lightly, try to find a way to rebuff his advances while keeping their work relationship intact. She needed to give him a chance to save face without compromising herself or their business arrangement. 

She gave it one last shot. ‘Randy, again, I’m sorry if I’ve said or done anything to make you think I have any interest in sleeping with you’ she managed to say, trying to keep her voice calm. ‘But like I said, I have no intention of stepping out on my husband. I’m sorry if I’ve given you any other impression.’

It was obvious by the look in his eyes that Randall Piper wasn't used to being denied - by anyone. Despite her rebuff, he held her face in his hands and he leaned in to place a gentle kiss on her lips, likely convinced that would bring Sara around.

What he got instead of the lovesick sigh he’d been hoping for was a sharp slap to the left cheek. As the sound reverberated in the quiet room, Randall pulled away and stared back at her, eyes growing angry.

At that very moment, the sound of the doorbell was heard coming from the front of the house. 

Apparently, they had company. 

TBC


	67. Chapter 67

Mozzie hadn’t expected to need the second pair of headphones. Being the anal guy he was, he always brought a back-up and frankly, it was a little far to his closest safe house to be running back for extra supplies. The thought struck him, not for the first time, that he should see about investing in a place in the Hamptons, maybe Montauk or East Hampton. Perhaps not as ostentatious as Piper Manor but surely, he could liquidate some of his assets and scrape up some cash to buy a nice little place nearby. After all, he’d been wanting to diversify his holdings…

His musings were interrupted by Neal who’d gotten to his feet and was craning his neck to get a better look inside the house.

It had been quiet inside for the past few minutes, Sara deep in thought as she scribbled away in the notebook she always kept with her. Through the binoculars, Neal studied her body language. He was looking at the cool, calm, professional Sara Ellis - always competent, efficient, polished. He didn't often get the chance to see her in her natural work habitat. For a brief instant, his eyes lingered on her long shapely legs, her skirt riding up just enough to get a glimpse at what he knew all too well was hidden underneath. A small smile graced his lips at the sight of her so concentrated and yet, so unaware of the sensuality that oozed from every pore of her slender body.

He adjusted the focus on the binoculars and zeroed in on her face; she had on her ‘no fooling around’ face. He could see the lines around her eyes deepen as she frowned, her mouth tight. She didn't look happy. And where was Piper anyway? Had the two of them had some sort of disagreement? Maybe about the value of one of his pieces? Upon further examination, Neal recognized that all too familiar rigidity in her posture, that harsh, wooden stance she took whenever she was feeling combative.

He sure knew that look. And only too well.

He called it her ‘Lot’s wife’s’ look - never to her face, of course. When she was angry or upset, she became as stoned faced and rigid as a statue. Sometimes, he feared she might break in two like a fine piece of china when she adopted the unwavering stance. The posture was reserved for those moments when she felt defensive, moments when she felt the need to keep her guard up and not get swept up in emotions. Her back got ramrod straight, her shoulders pulled back, her chest puffed out, her chin pointing clear across the room and her usually luscious lips disappearing into a thin straight line.

When they’d first met all those years ago, he’d seen her looking like this plenty of times: defensive, stubborn and tenacious. Unyielding. It hadn't taken long for him to figure out that behind that determined look was a woman afraid of showing her true feelings, a fragile human being, terrified of getting hurt.

These days, that demeanour was usually reserved for expressions of frustration or anger. Over the years, Neal had learned to navigate and defuse such situations. As a matter of fact, it had become a badge of honour to successfully put a chink in that armour, to get his wife to relax and smile again after she’d gotten herself so worked up. 

First off, he always took a moment to evaluate the intensity of his wife’s reaction to the situation. Was she just mildly annoyed, royally pissed off or off the rails bat shit crazy livid. He usually went from there. On the lower end of the scale, he could usually bring her around with something as simple as a flirtatious eyebrow wag, a playful wink or a warm, loving smile. There were even times when a simple ‘Repo’ delivered with just the right touch of contrition and charm was enough to break the spell. If he could get close enough without her biting his head off, he’d move on to the next step: a gentle, tentative touch. He’d begin with a sensuous grazing of her arm, a test of sorts. If she didn't flinch, he’d move his hands to rest on her slim hips. She liked that, it grounded her. 

If he was doing it right, he could actually feel her thawing like a snowman on a warm spring day. Then, he’d move in for the big finale; he’d let his hands slide down her hips and rest on her buttocks, giving him the option of just standing there with a sad puppy dog look in his eyes (if the situation so warranted) or pulling her brazenly against him (if things were moving along as he’d hoped). It all depended on the situation. Finally, there was the pièce de résistance. He would commandeer his sexiest, breathiest voice and moan a soft, sensuous ‘baaaabe’ with the most contrite, remorseful look he could possibly muster - because whatever had happened to put her in such a foul mood in the first place was most assuredly his fault. By then, if he’d done everything right, she was putty in his hands and although she’d pretend to still be annoyed, they were well on their way to working out whatever had caused her to go off the rails in the first place. 

At all times though, a careful assessment of the situation was the key to a successful intervention and eventually, a blissful conclusion. Like the guy in the old Kenny Rogers song, Neal had learned when to ‘hold ’em and when to fold ’em and walk away’. Sometimes, no amount of winking, smiling, cajoling or coaxing would do; Neal just needed to step away, let her blow off some steam for a while and let time take care of the rest. Twenty some odd years into this crazy experiment called marriage, he’d gotten really good at evaluating at which point it was safe to go back in and try his luck again. Her body would relax just a touch, perhaps she’d grace him with a surreptitious glance or an over exaggerated huff and that was the moment when he slinked back into the picture like a shrewd predator, zeroing in on the tiny little opening she’d left for him to work his magic. 

Truth be told, it had become somewhat of a ritual between them, a choreographed dance and sometimes, Neal swore she deliberately stirred the pot just to watch him operate. On more than one occasion, their squabbles had culminated in some mind blowing sex, complete with all the pent up emotions and energy that had been percolating while they were having it out. Mount Vesuvius had nothing on the explosive Caffreys and their antics in the bedroom. 

Neal’s eyebrows furrowed and his jaw clenched as he squinted to get a better look through the binoculars. Whatever had rattled her cage in this instance certainly warranted a seven, maybe even an eight, on the Sara Ellis annoyance scale. 

He saw her look up towards the back of the room and through his headphones, he heard the sound of a chair scraping the floor. Although he wasn't able to get a good look, he could only surmise that the great divine Randall Piper had entered the room. He watched Sara’s eyes following the man as he ostensibly took a seat. Neal adjusted the binoculars with both hands in order to try to get a better look. Across from his wife, he could see a pair of hands folded on the table. Then, he heard the man’s voice loud and clear.

‘I’m sorry… about what happened upstairs. I thought we were… on the same page.’

Neal pulled his eyes away and glanced in Mozzie’s direction, exchanging curious looks. It appeared Sara and her client had had some sort of disagreement. 

‘Looks like there’s trouble in paradise’ Mozzie murmured under his breath.

Neal returned his attention to the goings-on in the house, ears and eyes focussed on the voices inside.

‘I’m sorry too… if I gave you the impression I was interested in having a… fling.’

‘A fling?’ Neal cried out. ‘What the hell…’ Maybe he’d heard wrong. 

Mozzie couldn't hear what Neal had just said but he sure as hell could read his lips - and his body language. There was no doubt Neal was getting annoyed; his face was growing red, his jaw slackened, his eyes narrowed.

‘Have I been reading the signals wrong? I thought we were getting closer.’

Piper’s voice again, sounding apologetic but Neal still couldn't see the man’s face. Sara, on the other hand, had begun to relax the expression on her face and Neal’s jaw dropped when she spoke again, her voice soft. 

‘Randy, what we had back then… it was real. It was great.’

‘Holy shit!’ Neal couldn't help but cry out. 

Was he about to witness his wife stepping out on him right before his very eyes? This time, Mozzie heard him despite the headphones propped on his head. He pulled them off, turning his undivided attention to his best friend. 

‘Neal…’ he said in warning, feeling the other man growing agitated. Neal shushed him with a wave of his hand. Sara was still talking. 

‘But I was twenty-two years old and there was nothing to stop me from… being with you. My life is totally different now. I’m not that kid anymore. I’m married to an amazing man and I love him very much. We’ve built a life together and I would never do anything to jeopardize what we have.’

Neal moved a few feet over, jockeying for position, trying to get a better look at Randall Piper’s face. He could feel himself being pulled apart inside, his feelings disjointed and contradictory - anger at the man for stepping over the line with a married woman who happened to be his wife, relief at Sara’s response to Piper’s advances and guilt, at listening in on two people who had no idea they were being spied on. 

Piper’s deep voice was heard over the headphones, clear as a bell.

‘That’s just it. None of that has to change. Like I said, I’m not asking you to leave your husband and come live with me. Although to be honest, I probably wouldn't say no to that. It’s just… being around you these past few weeks reminds me of how wonderful things used to be between us. We were good, weren’t we?’

Mozzie’s eyes were riveted on Neal. Any minute now, he was going to lose his shit and go marching into that house to confront Randall Piper. He wasn't sure how to keep things from totally going south. 

Predictably, with his face growing red, Neal shouted out to no one in particular. ‘Goddamn son of a bitch!’

He watched through his binoculars as Piper moved clearly into his field of vision and he took a step closer in order to get a better look. Now, he was standing outside the protective tree cover, totally exposed. If someone happened to look out the dining room window towards the garden, he would be spotted in an instant. 

Neal could see Piper moving closer to Sara, taking a seat on the edge of the dining room table, inches from her. And that’s when it happened: Randall Piper brought his hand up to touch Sara’s hair, caressing her neck. Neal lost it. He ripped the headphones off his ears, threw the binoculars into the bushes and began to sprint across the lawn, doing his best to sidestep the mounds of snow that were still covering the ground.

‘Neal!’ Mozzie called out as he took off after him in hot pursuit. ‘Stop!’

It was almost as if Neal had a firecracker up his butt. He bolted towards the house like a man half his age, trying his best to sidestep the muddy spots on the lawn. He was going full speed ahead when he slipped on a patch of melting snow and took a dive. By the time he’d recovered his footing enough to get up, Mozzie was tackling him from behind. Neal went down again, this time face down right in a mud puddle, the sludge splashing onto his favourite tie as he groaned. The two men rolled around on the ground, Neal desperately trying to get away so he could avenge his wife’s honour and Mozzie doing his level best to keep him from doing just that.

‘Would you please…’ Mozzie mumbled as he held on to Neal’s ankle with all the strength he could muster.

Neal was attempting to crawl away, kicking the hand that was trying desperately to hold him back. Mozzie faltered momentarily but managed to get a firm grip of Neal’s pants and pulled. The sound of material ripping was heard and the two men froze, wondering how bad the damage was.

‘Neal! Would you please stop! Listen to me!’ Mozzie was saying over Neal’s Neanderthal groans. Neal continued to kick like a two-year-old in the throes of a temper tantrum, determined to get away. 

‘I said stop!’ Mozzie shouted, tugging insistently on Neal’s pant leg. He dug his feet firmly into the sopping wet ground, intent on getting some traction but he slipped, landing the two of them right back where they’d started. 

‘Would you please listen to me’ Mozzie grunted as Neal stilled. ‘Now get back behind those trees before someone sees us and calls the police.’

Mozzie was the first to get to his feet and he offered his hand to help Neal up. Neal’s suit was ruined, the earth underneath the snow creating a mess, the consistency of which looked like baby pablum - except for the colour which was considerably less… appetizing. Mozzie glanced towards the house, a mere thirty feet away and pulled Neal back to cover as the other man continued to protest.

The moment they returned to their secluded spot, Neal was reaching for the binoculars once again, his curiosity getting the better of him. Mozzie tried his best to wrestle them from him.

‘Would you… leave that alone for a minute!’ 

Neal fought him off with one hand, peeking through the binoculars at the spectacle in the house. Piper was still perched on the edge of the table and he was leaning in to kiss her when Sara turned away. That was pretty well all he saw before Mozzie managed to pull the binoculars from his hand, throwing them aside.

‘Neal! Stop!’ he said, his voice growing frantic.

Neal stared back, his eyes wide, his face flush. ‘News flash Moz!’ he said sarcastically. ‘There’s a guy in there making the moves on my wife.’ 

‘Would you just calm down for a minute and listen to me. You can’t go running in there half cocked.’

‘Like hell I can’t! Neal countered. Mr. Macho Man. 

‘Listen to me’ Mozzie insisted, taking a deep breath and letting it out. ‘What’s the plan here? You gonna bust in and beat the crap out of Sara’s biggest client? Is that it? Embarrass your wife, watch while she loses her job?’

Neal listened, his eyes growing wild. His breathing was loud and irregular and he wiped away at a smudge of muck that had landed on his lower lip.

‘First of all’ Mozzie continued. ‘Sara’s gonna have your head on a platter if you go riding in there on your white horse. She’s smart Neal and she can take care of herself.’

For a brief instant, Neal flashed back to a moment he’d imagined hundreds of times over the past few years - the image of Sara being held captive in a shabby motel, her hands tied behind her back, drugged and left for dead. One of the biggest regrets of his life was that it had taken him and Peter hours to find her while she suffered at the hands of a depraved sex fiend. Granted, the situation was different and Randall Piper did not fit the profile of a depraved lunatic but it had taken months for Sara to recuperate from the traumatic event. He couldn't bear the thought of her putting up with unwanted sexual advances while he stood a few feet away and let it happen.

He took a couple of calming breaths. ‘Moz, I’m not leaving her alone in there with that guy.’

Mozzie brought his hand to his lip, tapping gently as he reflected on the best way to handle the situation. 

‘Let’s be calm and think this thro —’ he said as his face lit up. ‘I know, I’ll go in there.’

‘As what?’ Neal cried out in desperation. ‘A girl guide selling cookies?’

Mozzie shook his head. ‘Look, Piper doesn't know who I am… I’ll think of something. Just… Neal, you need to get out of here. Do you really want Sara finding out you’ve been out here spying on her? How do you think that’ll go over?’

Neal’s mind seemed to focus. Mozzie was right, the last thing he wanted was for Sara to know he’d arranged to have her followed because… because he was a frantic jealous husband who had a penchant for being impulsive. She’d been going on for weeks about what a coup landing this account was. If he went charging in there, he could ruin her career as well as their marriage, all in one fell swoop.

‘But…’ he began.

‘Look at me’ Mozzie said, forcing Neal to look into his eyes. ‘Do you trust me?’

Neal’s breathing was fast, irregular, a crazed look in his eyes.

‘Do you trust me?’ Mozzie repeated more loudly.

Neal nodded meekly. 

‘This is what’s going to go down. I’m going to find an excuse to go in there and break this up. I’ll give Sara an out. She’s smart. If she feels she needs it, she’ll take it.’

Neal was only half listening, his mind all over the map.

‘NEAL!’

‘What? What?’

‘Get in your car and drive back to New York. I promise, nothing’s going to happen to Sara. I’ll let you know what happened the minute I step out of the house.’

Neal’s breathing was finally starting to slow down but he still had that look of terror in his eyes.

He glanced towards the house. ‘I can’t leave her Moz.’

‘You’re not leaving her. I told you, I’ll take care of it. You just pull yourself together if you don’t want her to find out what you’ve been up to.’

Neal sighed and looked around aimlessly, considering Mozzie’s suggestion. What good would it do if he went in there all crazed and smashed Piper’s face? For one thing, he’d probably break his hand and then Sara would be doubly pissed off at him.

‘Right away…’ he mumbled. ‘As soon as you get her out of there, you call me.’

Mozzie nodded. ‘Promise. Now go! Before someone sees you.’

Neal gave one last longing look in the direction of Piper’s mansion and hesitated, almost picking up the binoculars to check one last time. Mozzie gave him the evil eye and Neal took a tentative step towards the back of the house where he’d parked his car.

There was no good way out of this situation. Only ways to minimize the damage.

WCWCWC

Randall Piper was still smarting from the slap he'd just suffered at the hands of the beautiful Sara Ellis although it was unclear what hurt more, his cheek or his pride. They could hear voices coming from the front hall. Men’s voices.

‘What did you say your name was?’ Randy’s faithful butler was saying.

They heard someone respond, a voice not totally unfamiliar to Sara who’d finally gotten to her feet, facing her client. He had a nice red mark on his cheek and Sara couldn't help but wonder if she’d just thrown away her career.  
‘Sir’ the manservant said, standing in the doorway to the dining room. ‘There’s a gentleman here to see Ms. Ellis.’

Both Randy and Sara looked up, puzzled.

‘A Milton Quackendouche’ the man said, hesitating as he said the man’s last name. 

Mozzie stepped into the room, looking like he’d just gone five rounds with a mud wrestler. 

‘Actually it’s Quackenbush’ he corrected as he waved a meek hello to the room’s occupants.

Randy looked the man up and down, the strangest looking little man he’d ever seen.

Sara didn’t miss a beat. ‘Milton’ she said, without hesitation. ‘What are you doing all the way out here?’

‘Ms Ellis, I’m sorry to interrupt but Mr. Bosch sent me to get you. They’ve got some sort of an emergency at the office and they need you back there right away.’

Sara stared ahead. She felt relief at the sight of him. What the hell was Mozzie doing there? And what kind of tall tale was he spinning? At the moment, she was just glad for the distraction from the drama that had been unfolding moments before.

Randall wasn't amused. He’d just got socked by the woman he’d been trying to seduce and now, this strange little man had shown up uninvited.

Mozzie looked at Sara apologetically, playing his role to the hilt. He wrung his hands nervously and flicked off a chunk of dried mud from his scarf. Randall watched in horror as it landed on his expensive Oriental rug.

‘And you couldn’t call?’ he asked, visibly annoyed by the interruption.

‘Oh, I tried’ Moz said. ‘Several times but… there was no answer.’

Without hesitation, Sara reached for the phone in her purse and glanced at the screen. There were no missed calls, not a one. 

‘Oh dear’ she said, shaking her head and feigning embarrassment. ‘I didn't realize I’d muted it.’

She pretended to look at the imaginary list of messages. ‘Ten missed calls…’ she said with an embarrassed shrug. 

‘Thirteen, actually’ Mozzie said. ‘And then there were the dozen or so texts I sent.’

‘I’m so sorry Milton’ she said, the name slipping out without hesitation, as if he’d always owned it.

‘That’s all right, it’s a beautiful day’ Mozzie said. ‘I enjoyed the drive up.’

‘So… what’s going on back at the office. Is it something I can deal with by phone?’

Mozzie studied her face; she didn't look as flustered as one might think for a woman who, moments before, was suffering the indignation of being pawed against her will. He continued to play along.

‘No, it’s Mrs… Mrs. McGillicuddy’ he explained. ‘She’s planning a charity event and she wants to display some jewelry from her collection. She insists that you’re the only one she can trust. She showed up unexpectedly at the office and Mr. Bosch insisted I drive up here and get you.’

Sara sighed, feigning annoyance. She looked over at Randy and shrugged demurely. ‘Mrs. Mc..Gillicuddy is one of our biggest clients. She’s… very demanding.’

Randall nodded in understanding.

Sara was already reaching for her coat, slipping it on as Randall watched her prepare to leave. 

‘Milton, could you wait for me outside for a moment?’ Sara asked.

‘Of course.’ 

Mozzie followed the manservant to the front door, leaving Randy and Sara alone.

‘I’m sorry about this Randy’ Sara said, her voice solemn. ‘And I’m sorry about what happened earlier. I shouldn't have… it was inappropriate of me to resort to…’ she let her voice trail.

‘Why don’t we talk tomorrow?’ she said. ‘Figure out where we go from here.’

He nodded silently, unable to look at her. 

WCWCWC

Neal had the car window wide open despite the cool late winter air. He needed to feel the wind on his face in order to stay grounded. Twice, he’d pulled over on the side of the road and was just about to pull a u-ey in order to return to the scene of the crime when he stopped himself. Despite the fact that he’d just left his wife in a precarious situation, this course of action seemed like the lesser of two evils.

He glanced down at his phone. Still nothing from Mozzie.

What a mess!

All he’d wanted was to get some inside information for his case while looking in on his wife and now, it was anybody’s guess if she still had a job and whether or not their marriage would survive. He knew he could count on Mozzie’s cover story to keep him out of it but Sara would be demanding explanations and she wasn't easily duped. How would he face her with a straight face when she got home? Would she come clean about what had happened? He couldn't imagine her not saying anything - unless of course she didn't want to worry him. 

Mozzie was right. Sara Ellis was a strong, independent woman who did not need a man to fight her battles. But she was also his wife and he felt like a coward for not going in there and having it out with the man who’d disrespected her.

Jeez… when had relationships become so complicated. In the old days, roles were clearly defined. Men were expected to stand up for their wives, to protect them, provide for them. And women would be grateful for their knights in shining armour. His and Sara’s relationship had never been what one might call traditional but they looked out for each other, cared for each other, supported each other. Had he failed her by walking out?

He tried to imagine himself stepping into Randall Piper’s home, walking right up to the man and slamming his fist in that smug face of his. It would have hurt him as much as it hurt Piper; Neal was not a fighter. The fallout would have been terrible for all involved. Worse case scenario, he would be charged with assault, Sara would lose her job, she would throw him out and he would end up bunking with Raffie in the doghouse for the rest of his natural life. 

For now, he needed to lay low, hope Sara would open up about what happened and later, much much later, he would have to come clean about having been there, spying on her like a lovelorn teenager. 

And then, sneaking away like some cowardly wimp. 

The phone beeped and he glanced down at the name on the screen.

‘Moz!’ he cried out.

WCWCWC

Sara stepped out of the house to find Mozzie hanging out by some empty flower beds.

He’d known the woman long enough to know that she was not amused.

‘Mrs. McGillicuddy?’ she said sternly. ‘Seriously Moz? Have you been catching up on old reruns of I Love Lucy?’

‘Sorry’ Mozzie said meekly. ‘It was the first name that popped into my head.’

She turned to face him and he couldn't be sure if she was relieved, angry or a little bit of both.

She stared him down, a look he’d seen many times before. As always, that glare of hers had him shaking in his mud filled boots.

‘I’m getting in my car now’ she said, her voice steady. ‘I’m going to drive to that little café by my office, you know the one. And if you know what’s good for you Mozzie, you’ll be there waiting for me when I get there. And you're going to tell me everything, do you hear me?’

He opened his mouth to speak but she put her hand up in that dismissive way of hers. 

‘Just. Be. There.’

Mozzie watched her get into her car and start down the stately driveway. Once she was safely on her way, he grabbed for his phone and made a run toward his secret garden to collect his gear.

TBC


	68. Chapter 68

The knock on the door was so soft, Josh Monteith thought he might have imagined it. Then there came another, just as quiet. He glanced over at his roomie, on the other side of the room with his back to him, apparently sound asleep.

He put down the textbook he’d been trying to concentrate on and jogged over, opening the door to a sight he never thought he’d see.

‘Todd!’ he said, taking in the man in front of him.

It was as if the guy had undergone a total make-over and been revamped into the polar opposite of his previous self. The colourful hair was gone as were the wild clothes and over the top personality. He stood there in a pair of jeans, a t-shirt and a pair of sneakers and frankly if he hadn't gotten a good look at his face, Josh might have walked right past him on campus without even recognizing him.

‘Hey Josh’ Todd replied with a shy shrug. ‘Sorry to bother you.’

Sorry to bother you? Did the guy really just say that? A few months ago, he would have pushed right past him and done cartwheels on the way to jumping Liam’s unsuspecting bones. The change, not only in appearance but in personality, was jarring and not necessarily in a good way. 

Josh stood there, dumbstruck, mouth hanging open. Todd craned his neck and spotted Liam on the bed, his dirty blond hair on the pillow.

He’d already been speaking softly - a total departure for him - but he toned it down even further when he spoke.

‘I just wanted to say hi to Liam. Maybe you can tell him I came by.’

Josh turned to look over at his roomie, no movement apparent.

‘Yeah, yeah sure’ he said. ‘So… how are you doing?’

‘I’m good, I’m good’ Todd replied, his hands buried deep in his pockets. ‘Back to class full time and… getting settled in.’

Although he'd never been much of a fan of the guy or his relationship with Liam, Josh couldn't help but feel sad at the sight of him. There was little doubt that the total change in his demeanour was due at least in part to the medication he was taking. He felt his heart tug at the realization that, in order to keep from suffering extreme and potentially harmful mood changes, Todd Greenway had been forced to leave behind some of his joie de vivre. 

Todd turned to leave, wrestling one of his hands out of his jeans pocket and giving Josh a weak wave.

‘Well, take care of yourself man’ Josh called out after him as Todd started down the hallway.

By the time he closed the door, Liam had turned over in bed, facing him.

‘Did you get all that?’ Josh asked.

Liam sat up, ran his hand through his disheveled hair and nodded, his eyes downcast.

WCWCWC

It took three trips to the van for Mozzie to get everything he’d brought along on his little excursion packed up and ready to go. He could feel the blood pumping through his veins from the little con he’d just pulled. Since the moment Sara had driven off, his mind had been working overtime trying to concoct a plausible explanation as to why he’d shown up uninvited in Southampton, posing as an employee of Sterling Bosch Insurance. To her credit, Sara hadn't blinked an eye, almost as if they’d scripted his unscheduled visit together. Of course, he knew all too well that her apparent composure was merely a temporary reprieve. They might have successfully pulled the wool over Piper’s eyes but Sara wouldn’t be nearly as easy to fool. She wouldn't be satisfied until she’d extracted every single detail from him. 

When he’d called Neal to report on the latest developments, Mozzie had been beyond excited to tell him about what he’d spotted on the dining room table in Randall Piper’s summer residence. He hadn't had the time or the opportunity to take a picture but he’d recognized the painting immediately and had committed it to memory in the way only Mozzie could. It was a copy or (if Piper was to be believed) the original of the painting Neal and Peter had examined weeks ago at the Pruitt Gallery.

As Mozzie blathered on about his discovery, Neal’s focus had been elsewhere. He’d wanted to know exactly what had happened when Mozzie had stepped into the house. Minute by minute. Was Sara safe? How had she reacted to Mozzie’s sudden appearance? What had Piper said? And most importantly, had Mozzie managed to get Sara out of there? 

Once Neal had been reassured that she was safely on her way back, the men had turned their attention to concocting a tale that was credible enough for someone as savvy as Sara Ellis to buy into to. She was no fool and it was a sure bet she’d assume Neal was somehow involved. Trying to keep him out of the narrative was essential if either man wanted to live to see another day. Mozzie would take the hit for the time being and Neal would get around to telling his wife the truth at some point - some being the definitive word. But he wanted to do it on his own terms when the time was just right - which, let’s face it, might be the day those cute pink curly tailed creatures soared through the heavens. 

About twenty minutes out, Mozzie spotted Sara’s red Mazda up ahead and he passed her, giving her a friendly wave - which she did not return. He knew he had to hightail it back to the city before she did. He needed to be waiting in that coffee shop, preferably with a nice calming cup of camomile tea for her to sip on. In this instance, as in most others, it would not do to keep Sara Ellis waiting.

WCWCWC

Neal tried to keep his speed steady - just a lick over the speed limit. The last thing he wanted was for his wife to spot him on the road back to the city. He concentrated on the road ahead and reviewed his options. He could head home, get her favourite meal on the table and wait for her to arrive. He imagined her throwing herself in his arms, tears in her eyes, telling him about what had happened. In detail. How Piper was not the guy she thought he was, how she never wanted to go back there, how Neal had been right all along and how foolish she’d been not to see it. She’d ask him to forgive her for doubting his amazing instincts and beg him to take her up to their bedroom, wrap himself around her and make sweet love to her. 

He shook his head and snapped out of it. Hell! The only place anything even remotely resembling that scenario was happening was in his dreams.

More likely, she’d come home and not say a word. At least not for the first few hours. Then, when they went to bed, she might share a modified version of what had occurred, downplaying what had been nothing less than unwanted sexual advances. She was a tough cookie and she’d been forced to face many lewd and inappropriate comments over the years, especially in her younger days as a rookie in the cutthroat world of insurance recovery. Nowadays, Sara Ellis’ reputation at Sterling Bosch was solid. She was respected by men and envied by women. 

Neal knew she was more than capable of taking care of herself. Over the years, in response to a few unfortunate situations, she’d managed to develop strategies to keep herself safe on the job. As she’d made clear to him on numerous occasions, she did not need a bodyguard, what she did need was a husband to stand by her and support her in the decisions she made. But that didn't keep Neal from worrying about her safety and welfare and even though he was no Arnold Schwarzenegger, he still had plenty of testosterone running through his veins.

His inability to leave well enough alone had led to a messy situation entirely of his own making and now, he wasn't sure how to get himself out of this mess. He needed to get advice in the worst way. 

And there was only one person he could think of to help him with that. 

WCWCWC

It was late afternoon and the midtown coffee shop was buzzing as it did every hour of every day. Mozzie managed to snag their usual table, the one where he and Sara used to sit back in the day when he would sell out fences from is enemies’ list to help her with some of her recoveries. He sat on the edge of his chair as if waiting outside the principal’s office after having thrown a baseball though one of the school’s windows. He’d gotten her a nice cup of chamomile tea in the hope of placating her. Hopefully, the two hour drive had helped her calm down although just the opposite might be true. The drive from Southampton gave her plenty of time to visualize all kinds of scenarios and Sara was nothing if not an imaginative woman.

Two blocks over, Sara was exiting a carpark and heading to their meeting place. She’d tried a few theories on for size during the two hour drive and she was having trouble coming up with just one that didn't involve Neal. She’d been rattled by Randy’s overtures and although she hated to admit it, she’d been relieved to see Mozzie appear out of the blue with that cock and bull story. It was just the excuse she needed to get away from Randy and catch her breath, reflect on what had happened, see how she could keep things from totally falling apart. 

Upon analysis, she had to admit she’d been sending the man mixed messages, whether consciously or not, ever since she’d started working with him. It had been fun to flirt, to see if he still had feelings for her. But was there really such a thing as innocent flirting? How much of what had happened between the two of them was a consequence of her own actions? There was never an excuse for a man to keep pushing when a woman said no but she needed to own up to the fact that, up until today, she’d been anything but definitive in her responses to his playful banter. 

Sara Ellis was no stranger to being on the receiving end of unwanted advances. She wouldn't think twice about telling a passerby to bugger off if he leered at her, made disgusting sounds or called out obscenities. But when it came to business… it was a delicate balance and sadly, like most working women, she’d had to learn to deal with unwanted advances her whole life. She’d perfected ways of rebuffing business acquaintances without completely humiliating them, either by using humour or by avoiding being in close proximity to them whenever possible. Ninety percent of the time, the guy would get the message and back off. If not, Sara did not hesitate to put her foot down, even if it meant walking away from a potential client.

But it had been different with Randy. He was handsome, charismatic, someone she’d once cared about and she’d been a willing participant in their little game of cat and mouse. Now, she had to pay the piper - no pun intended. 

Through the café’s window, Mozzie saw her coming up the street, that look of determination in her eyes, her gait purposeful as she strode along in her signature stiletto heels. There never seemed to be any hesitation where Sara was concerned. She was always so sure of herself and if not, she knew how to fake it better than most. 

Mozzie sat, his head hanging down, preparing to put in an Oscar worthy performance all so Neal wouldn't be on the hook for the events of the afternoon. 

‘Hey Sara!’ he called out cheerfully as she got closer. Not surprisingly, she did not greet him, simply removed her coat and sat herself down in front of the steaming cup of tea. It was going to take a lot more than an overpriced cup of chamomile to get her to go easy on him.

She faced him, crossed her arms and looked him straight in the eye, intent on picking up on every single nuance on his expressive face. 

‘Start talking’ she said, her voice curt.

He knew better than to try to sweet talk her - that stuff might work for Neal but he was ill equipped to successfully pull it off. He had to go with his best plausible ‘explanation’ right off the bat. He would only get one chance at this.

‘I was trying to help Neal and the Suit with a case they’re working on.’

He could see by the look on her face that she was intrigued. She wanted to hear more.

‘Keep talking.’

‘I don’t know if Neal told you but a few weeks back he and Peter went to the Bureau and Jones asked them to look into a possible fraud at the Pruitt Gallery.

Not hearing any argument on her part, he continued. ‘The owner bought a Pollock but he suspected it was a fake. I had some time on my hands so I did some snooping around to help them out.’

‘And what does any of this have to do with Randy Piper and why you were lurking around his property just now?’

‘I heard through the grapevine that he had a few Pollocks at his summer place.’

‘You heard?’ she said, voice dripping with sarcasm. ‘What? Did you read all about it in this week’s edition of ‘Conman Weekly?’

Mozzie tried to keep a straight face. ‘No… but… I have my connections.’

She looked back at him with skepticism. ‘Did Neal know you were doing this?’

‘He knew I was poking around’ Mozzie admitted, hoping there wouldn't be a follow-up question.

He should have known better.

‘Did he know you were looking at Randy in particular?’

Mozzie needed to tread lightly. As all truly competent conmen knew, a good con always held an element of truth. He took a page from the old Caffrey playbook: no direct lies.

‘I might have mentioned it to him.’

She stared back, skeptical. ‘So how did you happen to come storming into his place with that crazy story?’

‘I was… listening in’ he murmured softly.

‘Listening in? You were eavesdropping on what was going on in the house?’

He nodded. 

‘Mozzie! He’s my client. The most important client I’ve got right now.’ 

‘It sounded like you might be in trouble’ he said, trying his best to spin the narrative in a different direction. 

His comment seemed to hit a nerve and her face softened momentarily. She sighed and reached for her cup of tea, took a sip. A thought came across her face.

‘You broke in and planted a bug in his house?’ 

He shrugged, trying to appear innocent but she didn't fall for it. She read something in his silence.

‘Me?’ she shouted, attracting the attention of a couple from a neighbouring table. She leaned in, whispering. ‘You planted a bug on me?’

He looked away, unable to face her.

‘Mozzie!’

He went with his most virtuous look - something he failed at miserably.

‘Why didn't you just ask me if he had the painting?’

‘I… I didn’t think you’d… tell me.’

‘Damn right I wouldn't have told you! Randall Piper is my client. Whatever he owns or doesn't own is confidential information.’

She dropped her tea cup rather noisily onto the saucer and got to her feet, towering over him. 

‘Where?’ she said, one single word. She watched his eyes glancing over at her new coat and she scooped it up and dangled it in front of his face, waiting for him to come clean.

He stood and gingerly reached into the lining, unzipping the tiny zipper on the inside and pulling out the bug.

She stared back, shaking her head in exasperation.

She leaned in against the table, staring him down. ‘This is what’s going to happen Mozzie. I’m going to keep quiet about what you did back there and in exchange, this is what you’re going to do for me.’

He nodded even though she hadn't yet made her request.

‘Neal’s got enough on his mind. I want you to promise never to tell him what you overheard in that house today.’

‘But…’

‘Mozzie!’

‘Fine.’

She slipped her coat on and turned on her heels. She stopped just short of the door and glanced back at him, her gaze softening.

‘Oh and Moz… thanks for having my back today’ she said just before stepping out the door.

WCWCWC

‘It’s not right, is it?’

‘What’s not right?’

‘That sometimes, I keep things from her.’

Peter shrugged. ‘Who hasn’t kept things from their spouse? Not the important stuff of course… just, you know, stupid little things that are just going to irk them or put you in the doghouse.’

Neal looked up at his partner. ‘Maybe that’s just something we tell ourselves to justify the secrets we keep and the lies we tell.’

On his way back from Southampton, Neal had made a detour to the Chelsea District and had whisked his best friend over to the café next door to the gallery for a little heart to heart. He had a lot on his mind and there was no one better to bounce ideas off of than Peter Burke.

It was obvious to Peter that something had happened to put that look of gloom and doom on his best friend’s face. He hadn't worked forty-six years for the FBI without developing a keen sense of observation. 

‘So, do you want to tell me what the hell’s going on here?’

Neal almost clammed up. But wasn’t this exactly the reason he’d driven all the way into Manhattan? To get things off his chest?’

‘It’s this thing with Randall Piper.’

‘That rich client of Sara’s?’

Neal nodded. ‘Yeah… the multimillionaire’ he said with mock haughtiness.

‘You’re still jealous.’ A statement, not a question.

Neal sighed loudly. ‘Of course I’m still jealous but it turns out the guy’s not exactly as advertised.’

‘What does that mean?’

‘Mozzie offered to…’ Neal searched for the right word then seemed to give up; this was Peter, after all, no point in pretence. ‘He asked if I wanted him to keep an eye on Sara while she was over at his place doing the inventory on his stuff.’

‘Keep an eye on her? You mean spy on her?’

Neal shrugged. 

‘And you said yes’ Peter said in response to his silence. Again, a statement, not a question.

Neal nodded. ‘I hesitated… but yeah, I said yes. Mozzie listened in on the two of them while they were working at his brownstone on the Upper East Side a few weeks back. He overheard Piper say he owned a couple of Pollocks and it piqued his curiosity. I kind of got caught up in it. Moz had me almost convinced that it could be Number 27, you know, the one we were looking into for the Pruitt Gallery. I knew the odds were astronomical but… the truth is it wasn't really about that. I was jealous and I wanted to know how Sara felt about Piper, how she acted around him when I wasn't there.’ 

Peter listened, no judgement apparent on his face.

‘You know with everything happening, my mom, Caitlin, the whole mess with Jesse… I haven't been at my best lately and things are… well, they’re okay with me and Sara but they’re kind of… bland.’

‘Bland?’ Peter repeated with a chuckle. ‘This isn't one of your pasta sauces, Neal.’

‘Things used to be amazing between us and lately, they’ve been just… good.’

‘Is this about sex?’

‘No… well, not just about sex. It’s about the excitement you feel when she’s around, that look in her eyes when you walk into the room.’

‘You’re kidding, right?’ Peter said, eyebrows raised. ‘You’ve been married going on twenty-five years Neal. Are you trying to tell me that things between you and Sara have always been amazing?’

‘Except for a few rough spots… yeah, they’ve been pretty well amazing. But now, this guy shows up from her past, he’s wealthy, good looking and I start to see that sparkle in her eye — but it’s for somebody else.’

‘What are you talking about? It’s not like women haven't hit on you since you’ve been married. Remember that designer you hired when you first opened the gallery? She was throwing herself at you right in front of Sara.’

Neal recalled the long ago incident. ‘I guess… but that was different. I didn't have any interest in her.’

‘And then there was that woman from your past… what was her name again?’

‘Michelle Young’ Neal said with a faraway look in his eyes. 

‘You were flattered when she came on to you and Sara was plenty upset.’

‘With reason, Peter. Keller drugged me and threw me in bed with her so Sara would find us together. And besides, Sara was in the middle of a bout of postpartum depression. It took us months to work through that.’

‘One of those rough spots you were talking about?’ Peter said. ‘Look Neal, nobody’s relationship is perfect. There are ups and downs in every marriage.’

Neal remained silent.

‘So what happened today to get you all worked up?’ 

‘Sara’s been inventorying his stuff out at his property in the Hamptons and Mozzie was keeping an eye on things… you know, to see if we could find out about the painting.’

‘But it was mostly about Sara?’

‘I guess’ Neal admitted. ‘So, I took a drive out there because… well because I’m a masochist. I wanted to see his place for myself, you know turn the knife in the wound. And I wanted to see for myself how they are when they’re together.’

‘And…’

‘Mozzie planted a bug in Sara’s coat—’

‘Jesus, Neal! What are you thinking?’ Peter interrupted.

Neal avoided Peter’s glare. ‘So I show up there and I decide to listen in on what’s going on inside the house. I can hear them talking and I can see them through the window into one of the rooms.

Peter rolled his eyes. ‘With your binoculars’ he stated with disdain. 

Neal didn't bother to respond. ‘The next thing I know, Piper’s coming on to her and I’m flipping out.’

‘Coming on to her? Like how?’

‘Just, moving in, touching her hair, telling her how much he missed her, reminding her of how good things used to be for them back in the day.’

‘What did Sara do?’

Neal sighed. ‘She said all the right things, you know about being happily married and that she wasn't looking to step out on me. But I freaked out and I was about to barge in and beat the shit out the guy when Mozzie talked me down.’

‘You were going to beat the shit out of the guy?’ Peter said, skeptical.

Neal frowned in response. 

‘Do you really think she was in danger?’

‘At first I thought she might be. You know I still have nightmares about…’ he let his voice trail.

Peter didn't need any reminding, he’d been there that day, right by Neal’s side when they’d broken down that motel room door and found Sara, drugged and beaten, barely clinging to life. He remembered the terror in his partner’s eyes.

‘But driving back I had a lot of time to think about what happened and maybe I’m overreacting. She seemed to be handling it just fine. He was totally inappropriate and let’s face it, the guy’s a jerk but he’s hardly the first guy to ever hit on Sara. I know she can handle herself but…’

‘So what happened?’

‘Mozzie sent me away and he went in and pretended there’d been an emergency at Sara’s office and that they needed her back at Sterling Bosch. She went along with it which tells me she was relieved to be getting out of there.’

Neal glanced at his watch. ‘Moz is meeting her near her office right about now and if I know my wife, she’ll be grilling him about what he was doing all the way out in the Hamptons, spying on her.’

‘So she doesn't know you were there watching and listening?’

Neal shook his head. ‘Hell no! Mozzie’s going to tell her he was there to find out about the Pollock… so he could help us with the case.’

‘I can’t see that going very well. Sara’s going to have a lot of questions.’

‘She’s going to be so pissed if she finds out I was there. I’m not even sure she’ll buy his story but Moz is going to give it his best shot.’

‘So, this isn't really about the painting?’ Peter asked, noticing the look of misery on his best friend’s face.

‘If I tell Sara I was there spying on her through a pair of binoculars like some sort of… pervert… well, she’s gonna blow a gasket. And frankly, I wouldn't blame her.’

Peter tried to imagine how he’d feel if Elizabeth was being hit on by one of her clients. Would he be tempted to get involved? To beat the crap out of him? The answer was fairly obvious.

‘Remember those old westerns we used to watch on Saturday mornings when we were kids?’ Neal said, seemingly out of the blue.

‘The bad guy with the handlebar moustache would kidnap the damsel in distress and tie her onto the train tracks. She’d struggle and scream and the guy with the white cowboy hat would ride up on his horse and arrive just in the nick of time to rescue her.’

Peter listened and smiled. 

Neal continued. ‘I guess what I’m saying is sometimes, it’s hard to know if I should butt out and let her deal with things by herself or if I should go all macho and invest in a white cowboy hat.’

He let out a sardonic laugh and looked over at Peter. ‘You’d think after all this time, we’d have this whole marriage thing figured out.’

Peter nodded in agreement. ‘I guess you have to ask yourself if this is really about Sara’s safety or if it’s more about you needing to flex your he-man muscles. Sara’s strong and she’s smart and even though you two are a couple, you’re still two individuals and you’re both entitled to your own thoughts and feelings.’

Neal stared down at his now empty cup of coffee. ‘If I tell her I was there spying on her… it’s like telling her I don’t trust her.’

‘And do you?’

Neal sighed. ‘I think this is more about me feeling insecure than about Sara ever cheating on me.’ 

‘So? What? You’re asking me if you should keep your mouth shut about this whole mess?’

Neal shrugged.

‘I can’t answer that for you buddy. You’re going to have to ask yourself how much damage a lie of omission can do to your marriage and how you’d feel if the roles were reversed and Sara kept something like this from you.’

Neal let that sit there for a moment, taking it all in. 

Something seemed to cross his mind and he got that naughty sparkle in his eyes.

‘By the way’ he said, changing tracks. ‘It is Number 27; Moz got eyes on it.’ 

TBC


	69. Chapter 69

‘And that’s pretty well it… in a nutshell’ Sara said, from behind her desk at Sterling Bosch.

Lydia Jordan sat across from her, her mouth hanging open.

‘Wow! I can’t believe it. He seemed like such a nice guy.’

Sara sighed and looked away. ‘He is… a nice guy. It’s Randy, that’s how he is; he goes after what he wants. This time though, he stepped over the line and it’s up to me to make sure he understands that… I can’t keep working in this kind of environment. It’s not fair to him, to me or to my marriage.’

If asked, Sara would be hard pressed to describe exactly what she was feeling about the mystery man from her past: curiosity, trepidation, frustration, disappointment with both Randy and, if she was totally honest, with herself. 

‘And Mr. Bosch is okay with this?’

‘To be honest, I didn’t really give him a choice. I told him either I take you with me or I’m not going back there at all.’

‘Well, he’s not going to let this account slip away, that’s for sure.’

Sara nodded but remained silent.

‘What about Mr. Piper, have you told him yet?’

Sara shook her head.

‘So tell me boss, what do you need from me?’ Lydia asked, springing to her feet.

‘Well, for starters I need you to free up your schedule for the next few days, make sure your caseload is covered by somebody else on the team. And I need you to be ready at 7:00 tomorrow morning. I’ll pick you up on the way to his place.’

Lydia could sense unease coming from the other side of the desk. ‘Are you sure you’re telling me everything?’

Sara looked away again, then returned her gaze to her friend. ‘To be honest, I’m not totally blameless in all this. I’ve been… enjoying all the attention. Don’t get me wrong, there’s no excuse for what he did today. None. But I think I might have been sending him mixed messages all along.’

‘Who am I kidding? I know for a fact I’ve been sending him mixed messages. The truth is I’ve been acting like a teenager with a school girl crush’ Sara said. ‘It doesn't help that we have a history together. I should have insisted somebody else take this account in the first place.’

‘But he asked for you specifically. If you hadn't agreed, he probably would have taken his business elsewhere.’ 

‘Not my monkey, not my circus’ Sara said with renewed determination. ‘Nothing is worth all this drama. Certainly not my marriage.’

‘I thought you and Neal had worked all that out after you returned that brooch Piper gave you.’

‘We did, sort of. But Neal hasn't exactly been himself lately. Linda’s death… and that whole mess with Caitlin’s brother hasn't helped. I should have been more sensitive to what he’s been going through.’

‘I guess even guys like Neal get jealous, huh?’ Lydia said. 

A smile appeared on her lips. ‘Do you remember that guy from the Russian Embassy who was sniffing around me a while back?’ 

‘Smirnoff or Smirkov?’ 

Lydia chuckled. ‘Smirnov, Anton Smirnov. He kept dropping by, sending me flowers, inviting me to lunch. He was even calling me at home.’

‘Until I transferred his account to Keith Peters’ Sara recalled.

‘Sam was so jealous. We might be talking about child custody arrangements if I hadn't stepped away from that one.’

Sara shook her head. It wasn't easy being a woman in a man’s world. As team leader, it was her job to make sure her female employees remained safe in the workplace. It was time she extended herself the same courtesy.

‘Now scoot’ she said, getting to her feet. ‘I’ve got to call Randy and give him the news.’

She glanced at her watch. ‘Oh God! Is that the time? We’ve got company coming for dinner.’

‘Oh yeah? Who’s that?’

‘Cameron’s sister. She’s visiting from upstate. She’s going to be one of Hope’s bridesmaids.’

‘I didn’t know Cameron had a sister.’

‘Are you kidding? He’s got three and two brothers.’

‘Whoa! Fertile territory up there in farmland. Have you met any of them?’

‘I’ve seen pictures but we’ve only met Cam’s mom. She came to be with him after Hope’s accident. She’s nice, just really… straight.’

‘Straight?’

‘Not straight, just… really religious and Hope says she’s pretty strict. That’s why Cam and Hope are having a church wedding.’

‘Because she’s strict?’

Sara laughed. It felt good to let go of some of the tension that had been accumulating all day. ‘No silly, because she’s religious.’

Lydia chuckled and Sara realized her underling had been pulling her leg, intent on making her smile.

‘You know, I can’t even remember the last time I was in a church’ Lydia commented.

‘Probably the same as me. Five years ago.’

Lydia frowned, searching her memory. 

‘June’s funeral’ Sara reminded her. 

‘Right, right. So, are we good?’

‘We are more than good. Thanks Lydia… for doing this for me.’  
Lydia took a few steps towards the door before glancing over her shoulder. ’No, thank you for trusting me to help with this big account. You’ll see, it’ll be okay.’

WCWCWC

‘Mom! Dad!’ Hope called out as she stepped into the quiet house. She was followed by Cameron and Becky Armstrong who was immediately accosted by Raffie. He jumped up from his usual napping spot by the foot of the stairs and sauntered over to them with his tail wagging, sniffing the newcomer enthusiastically. 

‘Hi pup!’ Becky said, crouching down to run her hand through his thick fur.

‘That’s Raffie’ Cam said. ‘Don’t start petting him if you don’t want to be stuck doing it all night.’

‘Dad?’ Hope tried again, stepping into the empty kitchen and turning on the lights. She looked back at her fiancé. ‘Didn’t you say Dad dropped by the gallery earlier?’

‘Yeah, he and Mr. Burke went over to the café but they never came back.’

‘I hope he didn't forget we were coming over for dinner’ she mumbled, reaching for her phone. 

‘Dad?’ she said into the phone just as the front door flew open, revealing Neal standing there with his cellphone up against his ear and his arms laden with grocery bags.

‘There you are’ Hope said, ‘I thought maybe you forgot we were bringing Becky over for dinner.’

Neal frowned with a look that said ‘What? Me, forget?’ which in fact was exactly what had happened. With his little side trip to the Hamptons and all the excitement that ensued, he’d completely forgotten they’d invited Cam’s sister over for dinner. Thankfully, his phone had pinged with a reminder as he sat with Peter in the coffee shop and he’d had just enough time to swing by their local Italian deli and pick up some fresh tagliatelle and jarred gourmet sauce.

‘Ye of little faith’ he said, handing a bag of groceries to Cam and putting out his hand. ‘You must be Becky. I’m Hope’s dad.’ 

‘Nice to meet you’ said the young woman. 

The resemblance between the siblings was striking and impossible to ignore. Although Cam was almost a foot taller than his sister, they shared the same dark eyes and warm smile. Neal recalled meeting Bonnie Armstrong when she’d made the trek to New York a few years back. Her eldest daughter was a younger version of her mom, down to the crinkle in her eye whenever she smiled. 

‘You look so much like your mom’ Neal said. ‘Both of you.’

‘Thanks’ Cam said with sarcastic eye roll.

Neal shook it off. ‘We’re glad you could come over for a visit’ Neal continued as the group moved to the kitchen. Raffie kept sniffing, sliding his head under Becky’s hand in the hope of getting another nuzzle.

‘Raffie!’ Neal shouted. ‘Go lie down.’

‘Don’t worry about it’ Becky said. ‘We’re used to having animals on the farm. Believe me, this is nothing. Try having a cow nuzzle you, they’ll practically knock you over.’ 

Neal chuckled. ‘Sara… Hope’s mom should be home any minute.’

He turned to his daughter. ‘Have you heard from her?’

Hope shook her head and began to unpack the grocery bags, examining the contents. 

‘Why? Is there a problem?’

Neal pasted on one of his world renowned conman smile. ‘No, no problem’ he said.

He hastened to change the subject. ‘So how did you two make out with your wedding shopping today? Find any nice dresses?’

Hope laced her arms around her dad’s waist and pressed her cheek against his chest, sighing loudly. ‘Oh Daddy, there’s just so much out there. We’re never going to be able to choose.’ 

Cam gave his father-in-law an amused grin and an eye roll while Neal laced his arms around Hope’s shoulders.

‘You’ll figure it out sweetie’ he said, kissing the top of her head.

‘Has anybody heard from Mozzie?’ Neal asked as nonchalantly as he dared.

‘No, why? Should we have?’

Neal had been trying to reach Mozzie since the moment he’d left the café and he still hadn't managed to find him. 

‘He mentioned he might be coming over’ he said as he opened the cupboard and began pulling out pots and pans. ‘So we should probably set up in the dining room.’

He turned to look at his future son-in-law. ‘Cam…’ he said handing him a pile of linen napkins ‘… you're in charge of setting the table.’

WCWCWC

In the end, Mozzie never did join them for dinner, to Neal’s chagrin. He had no idea whether Sara had bought Mozzie’s explanation or if she’d be gunning for him when she finally made it home. He concentrated on getting the meal on the table, engaging Becky in discussion about life on the farm and inviting her to visit the school of art before she returned home.

Sara finally arrived just as they were sitting down to dinner. She was looking a little frazzled but not particularly annoyed - certainly not at Neal. As always, she played the role of hostess to a tee, chatting with the girls about their shopping spree and commiserating about Elizabeth’s eagerness to make everything perfect. Neal spent most of the meal nodding vacantly, studying his wife for signs that she might be upset with him but he found none. She seemed distracted but whatever was on her mind didn't seem to involve him. Thankfully, the conversation remained focussed on the upcoming nuptials as everyone weighed in about possible venues for the reception as well as the bridesmaids’ dresses. 

Neal had just left the table to get a start on dessert when the doorbell rang. He made his way to the front door, wondering who might be popping in at 8:00 on a weeknight. Certainly not Mozzie; he hadn't knocked before entering the house since the day they’d first moved in.

Neal opened the door and fell back on his heels, stunned to see who was standing there.

WCWCWC

The campus was a beehive of activity pretty well every minute of every day whether it was the dining hall, the commons, the labs or the student library. University students didn't exist on a regular nine to five schedule: some studied or partied late into the night while others had their nose to the grindstone at the crack of dawn. There were about three dozen or so students in clusters in the cafeteria on this midweek evening. Liam Caffrey chose a quiet spot towards the back and set the two cups of coffee down on the table.

‘I’ve been meaning to check in on you’ he said as he took the seat across from Todd Greenway.

It was still jarring to see the new, more zen Todd. While they’d been dating, the man had hidden his more sombre moments from his boyfriend and Liam had only been witness to the more manic side of him: wild and crazy Todd who was always up for a good time. Seeing him so subdued made him kind of sad although he knew the medication his ex was taking was keeping him balanced and off the crazy roller coaster ride he’d been on for years.

‘It’s great to see you too’ Todd said, subdued.

‘I hear you're back in class full time.’

Todd nodded. ‘Yeah, it feels good to get back to normal.’

More like a new normal, Liam reflected sadly.

‘You’re looking good. How are you feeling?’

Todd scoffed. ‘A little numb sometimes but… overall, it’s nice not to always feel so out of control.’

Liam nodded. For a couple of weeks now, he’d wanted to check in on Todd but now, he had another reason to sit down with him and have a chat. It was time to put a definite end to their relationship and there was no easy way to do it.

‘I’ve been wanting to sit down and talk to you ever since I got back from my grandmother’s funeral.’

Todd reached out and patted Liam’s hand. ‘I’m sorry. I didn't realize she’d passed away.’

‘A couple of weeks ago’ Liam replied. ‘I spent a few days back home and…’

This was harder than he thought.

‘Let me guess’ Todd said, his voice quiet. ‘You got back together with your ex.’

Liam let out a long sigh and nodded. ‘Yeah, ever since I was home at Christmas… we’ve been sort of working up to this.’

Todd smiled, a totally unexpected response. ‘I’m happy for you Liam. I always knew you’d never gotten over him.’

‘Cody and I have a… lot of history’ Liam admitted.

‘That’s a good thing. You know each other really well. From everything you’ve said, he sounds like a great guy.’

‘He is’ Liam said, rather too enthusiastically. He pulled back.

Todd seemed to pick up on the awkwardness. ‘Really, it’s okay Liam. I mean it, I want you to be happy and if Cody makes your happy… well, I’m all for it.’

Liam smiled. ‘I wanted you to know that… what happened between us, it was… it was good. I learned a lot from you Todd.’

The other man chuckled. ‘You mean all those crazy moves between the sheets.’

Liam shook his head. ‘That and… a lot more. You taught me not to worry so much about what everybody thinks and… you showed me how someone can get knocked down and get back on their feet.’

Todd seemed embarrassed. He shrugged. ‘Well, I learned a lot from you too. How to be true to myself and stand by what I believe. Being with you meant a lot to me.’

There was an awkward silence, then Todd continued. ‘And… as difficult as these last few months have been, if it wasn't for our breakup, I might not have been forced to face my demons head on.’

He was surprised to see tears forming in Liam’s eyes. 

‘Hey, I mean it. I know you’ve been worried about me. But it really is for the best’ Todd said. ‘I feel so much better and so much more in control of things. The meds are a pain in the ass, I hate the side effects but overall, it’s much better this way. And the therapy helps.’

‘I’m glad. You’re right, I have been worried about you and I’ve felt a lot of guilt for everything that happened to you. I’m glad you’re feeling better.’

Todd nodded and smiled. ‘I hope we can both hang on to those happy memories. And I hope we can be friends. Not the kind of friends who hang out together, I think that would be too hard on both of us but you know, the kind of friends who shared something real and who are always happy when they cross paths on campus or in class.’

‘I’d like that’ Liam said, swallowing the lump in his throat. ‘That would mean a lot to me.’

The two young men returned to their coffees, sipping silently. They’d both said what they’d come to say and now there was the comforting knowledge that, in the future, they would both smile when they recalled their time together. 

WCWCWC

‘Randall!’ Neal exclaimed as he opened the door. He held back from saying what he really wanted to say which was ‘What the hell are you doing here?’

‘Hey Neal’ the man said, looking somewhat embarrassed. ‘I’m so sorry to drop in like this. Sara’s been trying to get in touch with me and we haven't been able to connect.’

Despite his determination to remain calm, Neal could feel his fists tightening by his side. ‘Come in’ he said, doing his best to maintain a civil tone. 

Gone was his earlier unease about Piper seeing his modest home. He stood tall and proud, staring the other man down. They were on his turf now. He couldn't help but wonder what had brought the man to his doorstep, their doorstep, the one to the house he shared with his wife.

He was about to call for Sara when she appeared by his side. He was surprised when she slipped her arm in his and pressed her body against his. What was that he was picking up on? Fear? Unease? 

‘Randy, this is a surprise’ she said as the three of them stood awkwardly in the front hall of the Caffrey home. 

‘I missed your call’ the man said, wringing his hands. ‘You said it was urgent.’

Neal’s eyes moved to his wife, trying to read her expression but Sara was keeping things tight, professional. His instinct was to stand between the two of them, force Piper to stand down, throw him out of his house. He snapped out of it, reminding himself that his impulsive actions had gotten him into trouble countless times before. Still, he waited for any signs of distress from Sara, prepared to react if necessary.

She glanced around, distracted. The open concept of their main floor, which had always been a beloved feature of their home, certainly didn't lend itself to the kind of conversation she needed to have with her client. 

‘Honey, do you mind if I slip out for a few minutes? There’s something I need to discuss with Randy.’

Neal fought his instincts. ‘Of course’ he said, stepping back.

Raffie appeared as Sara slipped into her coat. Perhaps he was going for an unexpected walk. He let himself fall at Neal’s feet as Sara opened the door and prepared to step out without him. In a surprise move, Sara turned to her husband and gave him a soft kiss on the lips. ‘I’m fine and I love you for keeping things civil’ she seemed to be saying.

‘We won’t be long’ she said reassuringly as Randall Piper looked on.

WCWCWC

Meadowbrook Street was a short street, smack dab in the middle of the quiet Prospect Park neighbourhood where the Caffreys lived. Sara and Randall Piper headed out in the direction of the main thoroughfare, Edgewood Drive, and made a right turn. 

‘I was hoping we could talk about what happened this afternoon’ Randall said, walking slowly by Sara’s side.

Sara nodded and let him speak.

‘I’m sorry, I was totally out of line coming on to you like I did.’ 

‘You think?’ Sara said, raising a perfectly shaped eyebrow.

He smiled; there was that caustic sense of humour he’d always been so fond of.

‘I know there’s no excuse for what I did. I got carried away. We’ve been spending so much time together these past few weeks and I was starting to think that maybe you still had feelings for me.’

Sara slowed the pace. ‘I do have feelings for you Randy. I told you. All that time we spent together back in university… those are happy memories.’

Randy could feel a ‘but’ coming on and he waited for it. 

‘But I’m very much in love with my husband and I love the life we have. Our daughter is getting married in a few weeks, our son is amazing and we’re helping our foster daughter get herself sorted out. Those are the things that matter in my life, not parties or glamorous gowns or expensive art and jewelry.’

He listened, nodding.

‘Don’t get me wrong’ she said with a soft laugh. ‘I love all that stuff too but… well, that’s not what I’m about.’

‘Can you forgive me? For acting like a jerk?’

She replied in kind. ‘Can you forgive me for going all Joan Crawford on you and smacking you across the face?’

He chuckled. ‘It was… dramatic, wasn't it?’

It was her turn to smile. 

‘But I deserved it.’

He frowned. ‘Tell me, that guy who showed up earlier, was he really from your office?’

She turned to look at him and arched an eyebrow, declining to respond.

‘All right… I guess you’re entitled to your secrets’ he conceded. ‘So, what happens next?’

‘I think it would be wiser if we didn't spend any more time alone together. We have a tendency to start talking about the past and… I don’t think that’s good for either one of us.’

He nodded. ‘Agreed.’

‘I’d like to finish up the job with my colleague, Lydia Jordan. She’s smart and quick as a whip and that way, we can get this inventory finished sooner.’

She snuck a peek to see how her suggestion was sitting with him.

‘That sounds reasonable to me’ he said.

‘Good’ she said, turning and putting her hand out. They shook on it. Then, Sara reached out and hugged him. It was a short, bittersweet hug, reminiscent of the innocence of their younger days.

They continued walking, rounding the corner and suddenly they were back on Meadowbrook Street, the Caffrey house looming in the distance.

‘This is quite the life you’ve got here’ he commented, looking at the neighbouring homes.

She glanced in his direction, unsure whether he was being sarcastic or not. She was surprised to find a look of longing on his face.

‘You know I always wanted kids’ he said, surprising her once more. ‘A nice house in the suburbs, a good woman to share it all with.’

He sighed. ‘I’ve been married three times’ he said. ‘I’ve been chasing my tail for years, looking for… I’m not quite sure what. But I keep messing it up.’

‘Maybe you’ve been looking in the wrong places.’

Sara glanced at their house up the street, spotted Myrtle Stevens waving to her as she got into her car. 

‘Hey Sara!’ the neighbour called out.

Sara waved back. ‘It’s not a mansion in the Hamptons’ she said. ‘But it’s home and this is where my heart is… and always will be.’

There was silence as they continued walking, then Randall spoke, surprising her yet again.

‘So tell me, what does this Neal Caffrey guy have that’s so great?’

Sara smiled as she thought of her husband, her faithful, devoted, loving husband. ‘Neal is… one of a kind. He’s the most gentle, most loving man I’ve ever known. He’s an amazing dad and he’d do anything in the world for me and our kids. I love him even more than the day I married him and I can’t imagine my life without him.’

They’d arrived back at their starting point and they stood for a moment outside the house. They shook hands again.

‘See you in the morning’ Sara said as she watched him climb into the backseat of his black Mercedes Benz. 

His driver straightened his cap and started the car, slowly pulling away from the curb as Sara glanced up at their house. Hers and Neal’s. The house where they’d raised their kids and where they’d lived their wonderful lives for over twenty years. Something caught her eye, a roof shingle that had come unglued. Her eyes wandered, noticing the porch was looking pretty shabby; it was badly in need of a fresh coat of paint. They would need to see to that sooner than later. 

She pulled her coat tightly around her and smiled as she ambled up the walkway. 

It was home and it was perfect. Just perfect.

WCWCWC

Except for a surreptitious exchange of glances once she’d returned from her walk, not a word was spoken between Neal and Sara until they found themselves alone in their bedroom. Neal had been careful not to say anything that might make his wife suspicious of his recent activities - of which he wasn't particularly proud. He was dying to know about her little talk with Mozzie but he couldn't very well come out and ask her about it. All he could do for the time being was lay low and hope the whole mess would blow over and Sara would eventually decide to tell him what had happened in Southampton that afternoon.

‘You’ve been awfully quiet all night’ he said as he busied himself in their walk-in closet, making his selection of a shirt and tie for the next day. 

He sensed her sneaking up behind him, her bare feet silently padding across the hardwood floor, then more quietly still as she reached the area rug in the closet. She stood behind him, wrapping her arms around his waist. She didn't say a word, just placed her cheek against his bare back and stood there for a moment, running her hands up and down his chest, her breathing uneven.

He turned to face her, the question burning on his lips. ‘What was all that with you and Piper?’

She took a deep breath and reached up to caress his hair with her fingertips. Neal sighed in response to her comforting touch.

‘I’ve decided to bring Lydia along with me to Southampton tomorrow so we can finish the inventory more quickly’ she said. ‘I’ve got cases piling up in my in-basket at work and I need to get back.’

He covered it up as well as he could but he felt his body relaxing in response to the news. He pushed his luck with one more question.

‘Is everything all right? I mean… with Piper?’

Her face grew tense, her eyes narrowed, her mouth tightened. ‘Yeah, yeah, of course. It’s just… taking a lot longer to get the job done than I thought it would.’

He nodded and Sara pulled her eyes away from his gaze, burying herself in his arms. Without the benefit of her four inch heels, she felt so small and fragile against his six-foot frame. This woman, who could stand up to almost anything and who could remain strong even when he fell apart, suddenly looked so vulnerable. She buried her face in the crook of his neck and Neal ran his hands up and down her back soothingly. 

The realization of what was at stake seemed to hit Sara all at once and she shivered, curling up in his arms. How could she have behaved so recklessly? 

‘I love you Neal’ she said, her voice muffled.

‘I love you too, Repo’ came his response.

She looked up, her mouth searching for his as they stood barefoot in their walk-in closet, the house quiet around them. He could feel the hunger on her lips, an unusual yearning for comfort and solace. There was an intensity to her touch that he didn't recognize, her body coiled tightly, writhing as if she needed to rid herself of some invisible force which had taken over and wouldn't let her go. She began to devour his mouth, her hands reaching up to hold his face in place, almost as if she was afraid he might slip away if she didn't keep him grounded there, in her grasp.

He responded in kind, his arms snaking around her waist, their breathing growing more uneven as their kisses intensified. He let his hands slip down her body and rest on her hips, pulling her in against him as he felt her tremble. 

‘I love you’ she said again with such fervour, he wondered if she might be crying.

Her bottom lip quivered and she lifted her leg and wrapped it clumsily around his waist as he cradled her hip, helping her keep her balance. It was as if she needed to have every single inch of her body pressed up against his, nothing less would do.

‘Sara?’ he managed to say, baffled by the intensity of her response. She silenced him again with her mouth, hands growing more frantic against his scalp, tugging at his hair insistently, needing to feel every inch of him. There was an urgency to her movements, a quiet intensity he rarely saw, none of that playfulness that usually characterized their intimate moments. She took a few steps back, lips still fused to his and pulled him along with her until they’d arrived by the bed. 

‘What’s wrong baby?’ he murmured, one hand in her hair, caressing her soft curls while he held her tightly against him. She didn't respond, just pulled him in closer as she let herself tumble onto the bed with Neal falling on top of her.

She made a grunting sound as his body collapsed on top of hers and her legs immediately wrapped themselves around his waist, wrapped so tightly he gasped in response. 

‘Neal…’ she murmured in his ear, her voice breathless. ‘I love you so much.’

He could feel a sense of disquiet vibrating through her every limb, a frantic hunger, an uncharacteristic need to be comforted, reassured. He held her close, eager to soothe whatever sudden restlessness was causing her to quiver in his arms. 

‘I don’t want to lose you’ she whispered as she worked feverishly to help him slip out of his sleep pants.

He followed suit, hands urgently tugging at the t-shirt she’d slipped into just moments before. She whimpered like a wounded animal as he momentarily took his hands off her and she reached for him, returning his hands to roam her body as if she might wither away if he didn't keep touching her. Neal could feel her trembling, her skin cold and clammy against his.

‘You’re never going to lose me sweetheart’ he murmured reassuringly against her ear.

But even those comforting words didn't seem to be enough.

‘Promise’ she breathed, her voice raw. It was an anguished plea, not a question. As if her life depended on his answer.

‘I promise’ he whispered. 

They kissed hungrily, voraciously as if time might run out before they had kissed enough to heal the wounds, to soothe the pain. And yet knowing it might never be enough. 

More than anything, Neal wanted to comfort her, reassure her that his commitment to her was unconditional and absolute, that he would always be there, no matter what. This was Sara at her most vulnerable and she was trusting him to see her this way: frantic and out of control, intimacy in the most profound sense of the word. 

He placed her gently onto her back and covered her body with his, shielding her from whatever real or imagined despair was presently consuming her. She cried softly as they made love, holding on to him so tight he could barely breathe. He didn't ask why, just held her, whispering lovingly throughout, words of love, words of devotion.   
When it was all over, her body finally relaxed as if her demons had been exorcised and she turned onto her side, Neal spooning her tenderly.

There would be a time to come clean about their mutual deceptions. 

This, however, was not that time. 

TBC


	70. Chapter 70

Conventional wisdom says that being out in the country air quiets the mind and helps you leave your troubles behind. It was unclear whether or not conventional wisdom applied to Neal Caffrey and Sara Ellis on this early spring weekend in April.

They sat side by side as mile after mile passed them by on the way to their weekend getaway in the Hamptons. It was a gorgeous day and Neal had suggested they leave early and take their time, stop off somewhere for a nice leisurely lunch, maybe visit a couple of shops in the quaint villages along the way, do a little bit of antiquing. The sun was growing stronger by the day and there was very little left in the way of snow; spring had finally arrived after a long, brutal winter. 

Neal snuck a peek at his wife through his Ray-Bans, noticing her staring out the car window at the road ahead. They’d both been quiet for the past twenty minutes or so.

Thoughtful and quiet.

As the days passed, there’d been no talk about the events of that afternoon Mozzie had shown up uninvited at Randall Piper’s summer home. As a matter of fact, on the morning following her meltdown, Sara had gotten up at the break of dawn and had carried on as if nothing had happened. When Neal had tried to ask a few leading questions about what had caused her to become so emotional, she’d managed to out-Caffrey him and had changed the subject faster than a fat kid chasing after an ice cream truck.

One might say the incident was behind them for good except for the fact that Neal’s lie of omission was increasingly weighing on him. Sneaking around behind your spouse’s back was… not cool - even he could admit that. And besides, Mozzie had a propensity for dropping bombs when you least expected. It was just a question of time before Sara found out he’d been lurking in the bushes, spying on her like some peeping tom. Better to put his own spin on things while he still could. As they crossed the miles, he mentally rehearsed the many approaches he might take… and assessing their odds of success. 

Remorseful: ‘Honey, I’m sorry. There’s no excuse for what I did. I was way out of line.’

Playful: ‘Guess what I saw in Randall’s garden while I was lurking around there the other day?’

Obtuse: ‘Babe, you’ll never guess what happened this week?’

Sucking up: ‘Honey, you know how much I love you, right?’

Self deprecating: ‘Sara, I did something really stupid…’

Then there was his favourite, throwing himself on the mercy of the court, peppering his contrition with promises to do better next time - and meaning it of course. 

Of course. 

‘Please Repo… Give me a chance to make it up to you.’

None of it sounded quite right and yet he couldn't seem to let it go. Now that Mozzie had filled him in on his debrief with Sara, he realized that his wife’s main motivation for not telling him about the incident was out of genuine concern for him. She hadn't wanted him to get upset - which seemed a lot more noble than the reasons he had for keeping his mouth shut about his indiscretion. 

Sara turned to look at him and smiled, her guilty eyes hidden behind her oversized shades. She too had been struggling with telling her husband the truth. The whole truth. She could downplay the fact that Randy had come on to her - for Neal’s sake - but it was her part in egging her client on that had her feeling the need to confess. She hadn't been fair to Neal, poopooing his jealousy when in fact, she’d been shamelessly flirting with her client behind her husband’s back. She shook her head and returned her gaze to looking out the car window. Sometime this weekend, when the time was right, she would unburden herself, come clean and finally put this whole mess behind them once and for all. 

Neal reached for her hand and squeezed it. ‘A penny for your thoughts’ he said, projecting.

She glanced over at him, her large sunglasses preventing him from getting a good look at her eyes. 

‘I was just wondering how Hope and the girls are getting along with the wedding planning over at El’s’ she lied.

‘Is it just me or did she seem a little reluctant about going over there today?’

Sara smiled. ‘I think she’s feeling pulled in all different directions with El, Olivia, Caitlin… and now, Becky. It’s probably a good thing I’m not there, she’s got enough to contend with.’

‘But her dress is all sorted out, right?’ Neal asked.

‘Finally. But everybody seemed to have a different opinion.’

‘Do you like it?’

‘I don’t need to like it, Neal. It’s her dress but yeah, it’s exactly the kind of dress I’d imagined for her. Simple and elegant.’

‘What about your dress? Did you decide if you’re going with the lilac or the ivory one with the gold overlay’ Neal asked as he recalled the photographs she’d shown him.

She took off her sunglasses and brought the tip to her mouth, biting down as she studied him. She valued his opinion when it came to her wardrobe and yet, he’d been reluctant about weighing in on which one was his favourite.

‘Why won’t you tell me which one you like?’ she said with a smirk.

‘Because this is your dress and I want you to feel comfortable. As far as I’m concerned, you’d look amazing in either one of them.’

‘I think I’m going to go with… the lilac one’ she said, checking his reaction out of the corner of her eye.

‘Yes!’ Neal said enthusiastically. ‘That was my favourite.’

‘Aha!’ she cried out as if she’d caught him in a lie - which is exactly what she’d done. ‘Actually, I think the ivory with the gold overlay suits me more.’

He chuckled. ‘I knew you were going to try to trip me up. The truth is the ivory one is the one I really like best.’

Sara chuckled and slapped his arm playfully. She tucked her arm under his and leaned in, letting her head rest on his shoulder as Neal kept his eyes on the road ahead.

‘Hey, you never did tell me how things went with Jim?’ she said, changing the subject.

Neal sighed. ‘It was all right. Just a check in… we talked about the wedding.’

‘And…’

‘I think maybe I’d like to have a glass of champagne’ he said, only just then making up his mind. ‘Would you be okay with that?’

Sara turned in her seat to face him. ‘Honey, I told you, I’m behind you one hundred percent, whatever you decide to do.’

‘Jim suggested I do a dry run, have a glass of wine beforehand to test the waters.’ 

‘This weekend would be perfect’ Sara said. ‘I’ll be there with you… we can talk it out if you’re feeling anxious.’

He smiled at her and lifted her hand to his lips, kissing her knuckles. ‘You think I can handle it?’

‘You’ll never know unless you try’ she reminded him. ‘Don’t worry, I’m not about to let you fall apart or ruin our weekend.’

He seemed to mull it over. ‘Yeah, I guess. It might be nice to have a glass of wine with dinner tonight.’

‘Then, it’s settled. We’ll order a nice glass of… whatever you want and we’ll enjoy it with dinner.’

Neal could feel his heart fluttering with anticipation. Just the thought of having a sip of alcohol had him feeling both excited and anxious.

‘Caitlin seems to be coping not too bad, huh?’ he asked, shaking away the unease.

A few weeks after burying his mother and the whole fiasco with Jesse, things seemed to be returning to normal for the family - a new normal.

‘I think Hope asking her to be a bridesmaid took her mind off things’ Sara replied.

Neal nodded and kept driving. It was always a crapshoot with Caitlin, had been from the very start. Sometimes, she acted like the responsible young adult she was becoming and then a seemingly innocuous situation would surface and she’d revert to being reckless and impulsive. 

Neal could certainly relate. 

Sara noticed the look of worry on his face and returned her head to rest on his shoulder. She poked him lovingly in the ribs as he squirmed.

‘Hey, enough talk about the kids’ she said. ‘This weekend is about us. I booked us in for massages and pedicures at the spa tomorrow and I made reservations for dinner at 8:00 in their dining room.’

Neal nodded vacantly.

‘Did you remember to pack a pair of jeans and your walking boots?’

‘Yeah.’

‘Good. They have a nice trail up there and I thought we could go for a hike tomorrow now that the weather is so nice. They’ll even pack you a gourmet lunch to take with you.’ she blathered on.

‘Sounds good babe’ Neal replied absentmindedly. 

The sun was shining, he was preparing to spend a carefree weekend with his beautiful wife, away from the nagging worries of work and the daily grind. And yet, his mind just wouldn't settle. For a moment, he thought back to all the secrets and lies of omission he’d kept over the years. These days, keeping things from those he loved just didn't feel quite right. When had things begun to change? When had holding things back begun to weigh on him? He glanced at the woman sitting to his right, unable to stifle a smile.

It was the day he’d married Sara Ellis. 

WCWCWC

‘Hey ladies’ Peter said as he came down the stairs to find a group of women assembled in his living room - so much for catching the last quarter of the Knicks game on the big screen TV.

Hope jumped to her feet and ran towards him, hugging him enthusiastically. 

‘Uncle Peter!’ She leaned into his ear and spoke softly. ‘Please save me!’ 

Peter thought she was kidding but when he pulled away, he could see a look of panic and desperation in his goddaughter’s eyes. He glanced at the other four women, his gaze resting for a moment on his wife’s face: that intense look of hers when she was totally focussed on her mission. Her lap was covered with linen samples and books with hairstyles and flower arrangements were strewn all over the table in front of her, spilling onto the living room floor. 

‘I was… Actually I came down to see if I could steal Hope away for a few minutes. I really need to check something with you… about the… seniors’ class’ he added, turning to look at his goddaughter and giving her an eyebrow wag.

‘Oh honey!’ El cried out from the couch. ‘We’re in the middle of something here. Can’t it wait?’

‘Actually, it can’t. Five minutes’ Peter pleaded. ‘I promise. I just… need to make this decision today and I really need Hope’s input.’

Hope gave her aunt Elizabeth a shrug and a meek smile.

Peter took her hand and led her upstairs, ostensibly to check something on the computer. Hope willingly followed. Once up there, she threw herself on her godparents bed and let out a muted scream of frustration.

‘I think we’ll elope’ she said, sitting up and facing her godfather.

He joined her, sitting next to her on the edge of the bed. ‘Honey, you have to speak up. You know how your aunt Elizabeth can get if you let her.’

Hope sighed loudly. ‘It’s not just her. It’s everything. I just want to marry Cam, Uncle Peter. That’s all. I don’t want all this fuss.’

Peter smiled at her, wondering when it had all changed. When had the blue-eyed baby girl he’d held in his arms become a woman? A woman! Old enough to get married and live life on her own. Sharing in Neal and Sara’s kids’ lives was the closest he would ever get to being a parent. And he got it now. That feeling that you’d do just about anything in the world to keep them safe, to make them happy. That surreptitious way they had of worming their way into your heart and becoming everything to you. 

He put his arm around her shoulder and gave a gentle squeeze. ‘It’s going to be a wonderful day, honey. And when it’s over, you and Cam will finally be married. You’ve just got to hang on… get through the next few weeks.’

She let out a groan of frustration just as her godmother’s voice floated up the stairs.

‘Hope!’

She sprung to her feet, followed by her uncle Peter. He wrapped his giant poppa bear arms around her and she melted against him. Her uncle Peter… he’d been there for her her whole her life. All those times she needed to run something by him… he’d always been there, ready to lend an ear, hold her hand, give her precious advice. Again today, he had come to her rescue and she knew he would be there until… until he was no more.

‘HOPE!’ came the voice again.

Godfather and goddaughter chuckled, complicit in this as in everything. Hope got on her tippy toes and placed a kiss on his cheek.

‘Thanks Uncle Peter’ she said before turning on her heels and sauntering back down the stairs.

WCWCWC

Sara had hit one out of the ballpark. The Topping Rose House was a lovely, old fashioned resort; just what the doctor ordered for a deluxe weekend of rest and relaxation. She hadn't skimped on the accommodations either: a full suite complete with a king size bed, a stone fireplace and a living area where they could curl up and watch a movie on the extra large screen television. The only regret Neal had as they stepped into the room was that they were only booked for two nights.

He carried in their bags while Sara followed with a bag of food they’d picked up at a local high end delicatessen: some cheeses, prosciutto, bread, strawberries dipped in chocolate and a bottle of peach cider. She tucked the food into the fridge located in the kitchenette while Neal set down their luggage and glanced longingly at the bed through the French doors leading to the bedroom.

The first order of business was to settle in and have a nice restful nap before heading out to the restaurant for a late dinner. 

‘You did good Repo!’ Neal declared as he kicked off his shoes and threw himself on the oversized bed.

Sara followed him into the bedroom and walked over to the window, glancing out at the grounds below and sighing in response.

‘It’s beautiful out there’ she commented wistfully. 

Neal watched her standing by the window, staring longingly at her long curvy legs, her slim hips and her hot little derriere. She stood tall, her shoulders thrown back as she took in the sights of the resort down below. Her posture had always been a turn-on for him; the way she had of standing perfectly straight, looking so confident and self-assured. She was wearing a pair of slim fitting jeans with a loose silk blouse in a pale shade of yellow which hinted at the firm breasts hidden underneath. Completing her look was a pair of smart looking flats he’d never seen her wear before. She looked amazing in anything she wore. Neal sighed and felt a familiar stirring.

‘Why don’t you come over here for a minute?’ he called out impishly.  
‘And why would I want to do that?’ she replied in the same playful tone of voice.

He pushed himself up, resting on his elbows and leering at her from across the room. ‘I brought something special for you. From home.’

Sara chuckled. She could well imagine what Neal had in mind as a precursor to dinner - a little something to help them work up an appetite, no doubt. She took a few steps towards the bed, standing at the edge and smiling down at him… pretending to play hard to get.

But Neal was quick and in the blink of an eye, he’d reached around and hooked the back of her knees, tackling her and laughing heartily as she tumbled onto the bed, landing in his arms.

‘No fair!’ she said with a warm laugh.

He kissed her soundly, shutting her up. ‘Perfectly fair’ he mumbled before immediately returning to her luscious mouth. 

She tasted amazing and her familiar fragrance filled his nostrils as he took in a deep breath. The prospect of making love to his wife always put a smile on his face but there was something about being away from home, away from the humdrum routine of everyday life. It made being alone together more exciting, more exhilarating. They were free to take their time, to be more adventurous, more playful, to moan and groan to their hearts’ content without worrying about disturbing the other occupants in the house.

‘You taste so good’ he moaned as he let his hands linger up and down her body. 

He reached underneath her blouse, pushing aside the soft material in favour of the silkiness of her delicate skin. Soft sounds emanated from his lips as he let his mouth linger on her neck, behind her ears and down towards her collar bone. They heard voices out in the hallway, growing louder then receding and Neal chuckled as he opened his mouth, using his teeth to unbutton the top few buttons of her blouse, and grinning impishly as he succeeded. 

Sara brought her hands up to rest in his hair, tugging softly. 

‘Good job Caffrey’ she sighed. ‘Anything else you can do with that mouth of yours?’

Now that he’d managed to unfasten the top her blouse, he moved on to her ivory coloured bra, nudging it and once again, tugging with his teeth in order to free her bosom from the constraints of the undergarment. Sara giggled as he poked his tongue out and curled it, letting it linger sensuously on the swell of her breast with an exaggerated growl. Her giggles morphed into a soulful moan as Neal flipped her onto her back, freeing his hands so he could work faster and more efficiently.

Buttons were unbuttoned and zippers were unzipped and before long, Sara had been divested of her clothes, lying on top of the bed in nothing but her lace bra and panties. 

‘Love this bra…’ he murmured, his voice rough as he ran his fingers along the top edge and watched her breath flutter.

The room was perfectly still, soft muted sounds coming from below their window.

‘You’re beautiful’ he whispered, bringing his lips to her ear. He pulled back, gazing at her lovingly. 

‘You look good enough to eat’ he added before moving back in, his mouth ready to pounce. He nipped at her breast through her lace bra, his nose attempting to push the undergarment out of the way again as Sara giggled and caressed his thick head of hair.

He let out a guttural groan as he placed his hands on her shoulders and let them slide down her arms, kissing as he went. He tugged at her bra straps, fully exposing her breasts before pulling away, licking his lips and leering at her, eyes half-lidded.

‘Like I said, I love this bra but this is good too’ he growled, his mouth covering her bare nipple and biting down hard.

She shivered and let her hands linger up and down his taut back, doing her best to remove his shirt. She gave up momentarily and let her hand slip underneath instead, running her nails up and down roughly as he shuddered under her touch. Her hands moved down to his waist where she began to tug insistently at his belt buckle. 

‘Too many clothes’ she mumbled as Neal lifted his hips momentarily to give her better access. 

She reached down, unzipping his pants and pushing them out of the way as Neal did his best to remove the rest of his clothing without having to take his lips off her soft, pliant body. His mouth had moved on to exploring her smooth stomach, kissing, licking, biting. Then, as if he was having second thoughts, he returned to settle on her breast where he suckled noisily, hearing her sigh in response to the practiced manoeuvre. He grinned to himself - that was always a winning move.

Sara felt her eyes flutter at the familiar sensation - a sensation she never tired of. One of his hands moved down the length of her body and was attempting to slip into her lace panties when she pushed him off, hovering over him, tugging his pants and boxers all the way off and throwing them on the nearby floor.

‘Mmmmm, a woman who knows what she wants’ Neal said with a naughty grin. ‘I like that.’

She smirked and put her mouth to work, letting her lips linger from his neck, down to his chest, leaving a wet trail as she continued down past his waist, settling for a moment and enjoying the feel of her husband’s all too predictable reaction to her ministrations.

Neal’s arms fell listlessly away from her body as he reacted to the feel of her mouth on him. He lay on his back, powerless and began squirming as she continued her exploration. 

‘Yeah…’ he murmured, sounding wrecked.

She looked up at him and grinned mischievously, enjoying the sight of him starting to come apart. 

‘You like that Caffrey?’ she said smugly.

He opened his eyes and gave her a crooked grin. His arms came up to pull her into him, eager to kiss her lips, to taste her again.

‘What’s not to like?’ he whispered as her body settled on top of his, creating a whole new slew of pleasant sensations from the tops of their heads to tips of their toes.

They made out for a while, rolling around on the oversized bed, breathless sounds emanating from their open mouths as they took their time working up to the main event. The sun shone into the room, creating shadows and light, warm against their overheated skin. They revelled in the freedom of knowing they wouldn't be disturbed, taking their time as mouths, hands, tongues, legs, arms, lips and fingertips got in on the action. Sara nipped at him playfully and he could see forceful, domineering Sara beginning to make an appearance. 

She was one of his favourites. 

After a while, she climbed onto his lap and settled on his hips with a look of mischief he knew all too well. Neal felt his breath hitch at the sight of her. God, she was beautiful and he wanted her so badly.

He was beginning to feel that inevitable sense of desperation, that slow, steady climb where, once he was on the cusp, he would do just about anything to have her take him all the way. In that moment, she was his queen and she could say anything, do anything and he would abide by her wishes. He loved her like this, so different from how she’d been just a few nights before. He lay back, intent on fully enjoying the experience.

‘I love you baby’ he breathed as she straddled him, taking control and leaving him totally at her mercy. 

He reached up, cupping her breasts and her head fall back in ecstasy. Despite the look of abandon, she was in control and they both knew it. She sat up straight and grabbed his wrists, forcefully holding them over his head against the bed, letting him know in no uncertain terms that she was in charge. 

‘Keep your hands where I can see them Caffrey’ she said, doing her best to sound threatening. She pressed her body against his, holding him down and positioning her hips directly on top of him. She let out a rush of air at the sensation of him sliding home. 

She heard him grunt and she began to grind against him, enjoying the view as Neal’s chest began to heave, his breathing erratic, head thrown back, eyes rolling back in his head. 

‘Yes ma’am’ he groaned breathlessly.

He loved it when she took charge, when all he had to do was lie back and enjoy the sight of her, the sound of her halting breath, the feel of her silky skin. And she, in turn, loved watching him struggle, finally giving in to his visceral urges despite desperate efforts to remain in control.

After a while, he looked up at her with pleading eyes. She released his arms and he brought them to rest on her hips, increasing the pace of his thrusts as he felt his restraint start to melt away. She lay her hands on his chest, hanging on as the thrusting intensified, allowing him to take back some of the control in their little battle of wills.

His face grew tense, his breathing, louder. 

‘Fuuuuck…’ he grunted.

His hips continued to rock back and forth, losing all semblance of control now. 

She let him. 

‘Come on Caffrey’ she shouted, an order this time.

He was happy to comply. 

WCWCWC

They woke to the sound of Sara’s stomach growling, their bodies still intertwined. Neal was the first to open an eye.

‘Was that you or me?’ he groaned.

‘Not sure’ she mumbled, her face firmly planted in his chest. 

He glanced over her shoulder, checking the time. Dinner reservations were in an hour.  
Their bodies were warm and clammy - a combination of having fallen asleep immediately after lovemaking and the excessively warm duvet they’d covered themselves with.

Neal placed a kiss on Sara’s forehead and extricated himself from her grasp. ‘I need a shower’ he mumbled, turning to sit on the edge of the bed.

‘Owww’ he grumbled, rubbing his back.

‘Old bones acting up Caffrey?’

He gave her a playful smack on the bum and struggled to get to his feet, stretching. ‘You can’t keep acting like we’re still in our twenties Repo.’

She gave him an eyebrow wag and hopped out of bed nimbly.

‘Show off’ he grumbled.

In the end, they decided to share the shower - water conservation and all that - and Sara gave Neal a nice back rub to limber him up. By eight o’clock, they were sitting in the posh restaurant, looking over the wine list.

‘This feels… weird’ Neal admitted as he perused the menu.

Sara reached out to pat his hand. ‘It’s going to be fine honey. I’m not going to let you do anything crazy.’

He sighed and returned to study the list. ‘I don’t even know what I want.’

Sara smiled at him; he looked like a little kid who’d been given one precious dollar to spend and couldn't make up his mind between the dinky toy and the colouring book.

‘Are you still planning on having the duck breast?’ she asked patiently.

He shrugged.

‘The Barolo might be nice with that’ she advised.

He closed the menu decisively and let it drop on the table. ‘You decide!’ he said with a pout.

They each settled on a glass of Barolo rather than the full bottle recommended by the sommelier; baby steps and all.

Neal seemed distracted although Sara wasn't sure if it was the idea of having a glass of wine or if something else was on his mind. She’d been waiting for the right moment to finally come clean about Randall; she didn't want anything between them. 

Not anymore.

She’d been holding back for weeks about some of the fantasies she’d been harbouring and it was time to put it all behind her. And that included telling Neal everything.

The wine appeared and she could see Neal’s hand shaking as he reached for the glass. It was as if a long cherished dream had come true and yet, he needed to keep this all in perspective and she was determined to help him do just that.

She reached for her glass and lifted it in a toast.   
‘To you Caffrey. For everything you went through to in order to get here. I’m proud of you.’

He smiled nervously and toasted, their glasses tinkling.

‘Here goes nothing’ he said with a nervous smile.

She watched as he brought the glass to his lips and took the time to breathe in before tasting. He took a small sip and smiled at her and she could see he was beginning to relax.

‘See?’ she said. ‘The world didn't stop turning.’

He nodded and smiled more widely this time, reaching for her hand.

‘Thanks babe… for putting up with all this…’ he murmured.

‘Putting up with what? Neal, you’ve been amazing, I’m so proud of you. But you need to be honest with yourself and with me, all right? Tell me how you’re feeling, if this feels right or not. There’s no pressure, either way.’

‘Okay…’ he said, sitting back and glancing around the place.

‘Nice restaurant’ he added. ‘They have room service too so maybe tomorrow night we can settle in our room and order something up, watch a movie, start a fire.’

She chuckled.

‘I mean a fire in the fireplace’ he added with a crooked grin. 

‘Sure you did Caffrey.’

They chatted about this and that all through dinner. Neal seemed to be enjoying the wine although he did have that deer in the headlights look in his eyes. By the time the waiter took their plates away he seemed to be more relaxed. He took one last sip of wine and set his glass down on the table.

‘You okay?’ Sara asked.

He nodded. ‘It’s feels strange… just a tiny bit of a buzz’ he said. ‘But yeah, I’m okay.’

Sara picked up the dessert menu and glanced at it. ‘I’m stuffed. Are you having dessert?’

‘I’ve been eyeing the pavlova’ Neal said, pointing to the menu. 

She gave him an eyebrow wag and he frowned. ‘And if you want some, order one for yourself, I’m not sharing.’

Sara fluttered her eyelids at him and he scoffed. ‘I mean it Sara’ he said, trying to keep a straight face. 

She could see he was in a good mood, the wine had mellowed him just a touch and he seemed a lot more settled now that he’d tried his little experiment without the sky falling. There would be no better time to talk to him about what had been on her mind for the better part of the past week. She waited for his dessert to arrive, glancing down at it and wishing she’d ordered one.

Neal took a bite and sighed. ‘Mmmm, melts in your mouth. Bad decision there, Repo’ he cooed, pointing to her cup of tea.

She chuckled nervously. Time to take the plunge, it was now or never.

‘Honey, there’s something I’ve been wanting to talk to you about.’

He put down his fork and looked into her eyes. Ever since her unusual behaviour earlier in the week, he’d been waiting for her to come clean - hoping she’d come clean. 

‘Something happened at Randy’s place this week’ she began, her voice tentative.

He leaned in to listen but didn't say a word.

‘Randy… came on to me… while we were working at his place.’

She expected some reaction from her husband: disbelief, indignation, anger. Instead, he looked down at his plate and fiddled with his fork, avoiding her gaze.

‘I know’ he said quietly.

Sara’s mouth dropped open. ‘What do you mean… you know?’

‘I was there… with Mozzie. In Southampton.’

The lines deepened on Sara’s forehead, her eyes narrowing as she struggled to understand what he was trying to say.

‘You were there? Outside Randy’s place? Spying on me?’ she finally asked, her voice growing indignant.

There was silence for a moment, the soft sounds of plates and utensils colliding as the guests at the surrounding tables carried on with their meal.

Neal looked up and gave a small nod as her frown melted suddenly replaced by anger and disappointment. She threw her napkin onto the table.

‘How could you?’ she said, under her breath.

‘Sara, please let me explain’ Neal said, reaching out for her hand.

She stood, straight as a rod.

‘I need some air’ she said, her voice controlled.

Neal got to his feet but she was already on the move, the sound of her stiletto heels echoing on the hardwood floor, leaving Neal to stand there with his half eaten pavlova and a look of confusion on his face.

TBC


	71. Chapter 71

Neal reached deep down into his pocket and pulled out a five-dollar bill with one hand while taking the dome covered platter from the young man with the crisp white shirt and black bowtie with the other.

‘Thanks’ he said, handing him the money. ‘Have a good night.’

He placed the covered dish on the kitchenette counter and returned to the one and only lamp he’d bothered to turn on, clicking it off and plunging himself into darkness once more. He glanced at his watch: 10:20, about forty minutes since Sara had walked out of the restaurant, leaving him alone at the table like some pimply faced kid who’d been stood up by the pretty redhead girl at the prom.

He stepped through the French doors leading to the bedroom, a sad smile on his lips as he glanced down at the messy sheets on the bed. He sidled up to the window where Sara had stood - had that really been just a few hours ago - and returned to surveying the grounds, hoping to spot his wife out there somewhere in the bright moonlight. 

Their room was located on the third floor of the main house, a stately, historic building complete with a wraparound porch, majestic columns and black shutters against a white clapboard background. Their suite faced the front of the building and Sara had been right; the view was enchanting, especially at night. 

To his left stood the annexes, four ultra-modern structures which, despite their futuristic look, created a curious yet appealing contrast to the main house - a strange mix of traditional and modern, unlike anything Neal had ever seen before. Somehow, despite the jarring disparity in styles, they’d made it work. 

Walking into the building that afternoon, he’d expected the rooms in the main house to reflect the more formal style of its exterior. He’d been impressed - and pleasantly surprised - to find that the rooms had a very modern, contemporary vibe, a definite contradiction to the historic look of the outside of the building. None of those small, divided spaces with a bathroom the size of a closet that were so often found in quaint older buildings. 

The rooms had all been refurbished around the time the annexes had been built, creating large open spaces that gave you the best of both worlds - tradition as well as modern amenities. Neal had immediately noticed that all the rooms showcased artwork from one of the Raphael’s competitors, the Butting Art Gallery over on West 24th. Definitely a win-win arrangement; free art for the resort and free exposure for the gallery. Interesting marketing ploy… definitely something to think about.

He squinted as he looked out at the grounds below, trying his best to make out some details under the full moon. Off in the distance, he could see a densely wooded area, leading to some trails for more robust hiking. Closer to the main house were paths criss-crossing the resort as well as an outdoor pool and what would soon be large, flowering gardens. 

‘I miss you Mom’ Neal whispered out of the blue as he stared out the window. For some reason, Linda Bennett’s bright blue eyes and warm smile had been making unexpected appearances in his muddled mind ever since the day of the funeral. 

‘I wish you were here… I miss talking to you. You always knew what to say to help me figure things out. The funny thing is all those years we were apart, I didn't even know I was missing you.’

He saw a couple come into view, ambling along arm in arm as they strolled down one of the lit paths. They were taking their time despite the cool spring evening. He watched the man slip his arm around the woman’s shoulder and pull her into him. He sighed, wishing he was out there with Sara, helping to keep her warm.

‘I know she doesn't need me to take care of her but… I want to’ he continued, talking to himself. ‘Does that make any sense? Sometimes it feels like she takes care of me more than I take care of her.’

His voice grew quiet, barely a whisper. ‘I know what you’d say if you were here… you’d remind me that that’s what marriage is all about, looking out for each other. You’d tell me to cut myself some slack, to not be so hard on myself.’

The soft sound of giggling came from the hallway outside their room and Neal glanced over his shoulder in response to the distraction. The voices faded as quickly as they’d appeared.

‘All I want is for Sara to be happy… for me to be the one that makes her happy.’

He grew quiet, imagining Linda replying to him, doing his best to tune into the silent sound of her voice.

Returning his gaze to the well-lit paths below, he could see some early signs of spring: the tender yellow of daffodils peeking through the newly sprouting grass, the splash of colour as crocuses and bright green tulip leaves appeared where weeks ago there’d been nothing but snow. Along the outer edge of the property, apple trees had begun to blossom; another sign that spring had sprung. 

He spotted two more couples, strolling along the winding paths before turning in for the night. One of them stopped and turned to face each other, their arms outstretched as their lips came together, seeking each other’s warmth. Neal looked away momentarily, feeling like a voyeur. By the time he glanced back in their direction, the couple had pulled apart and were continuing with their evening stroll. Lovebirds… he thought with a grin. That could have been him and Sara if he hadn't acted so impulsively.

He craned his neck to the far left, glimpsing the edge of the parking lot where he’d left the car earlier in the day. From his vantage point, he could just about make out the front end of their SUV; at least Sara hadn't taken off back to the city and left him stranded.

Moments after she’d stormed off, he’d followed her out of the building into the cool night air but alas, she’d disappeared from sight before he could catch up to her. His first instinct had been to go looking for her but he figured she wouldn't be very amenable to him chasing her around the grounds, calling out her name like some modern version of Stanley Kowalski.

‘SAAARAAA! SAAARAAA!’

That was one sure way of ending his marriage in short order. Instead, for once, he’d forced himself to calm down and think rationally before doing something he might live to regret. It seemed wiser to return to their room and wait for her to make her way back when she was good and ready.

They both had things they needed to get off their chests, things they needed to say to one another. He regretted having blurted out his little confession like that, without any regard for her; as if by letting the words spill out, he would be instantly liberated from his guilt, a selfish thing to do, really. She’d obviously had something on her mind too and he’d just bulldozed right over her, not even giving her a chance to finish what she’d started. 

He blinked as he spotted a lonely figure off in the distance. He squinted, recognizing his wife’s gait as she made her way towards the entrance to the main building, her arms wrapped tightly around her shoulders. She walked at a determined pace, no nice slow stroll out in the moonlight for Sara Ellis. 

Not tonight anyway. 

Sure enough, she got closer to the front door, finally disappearing from sight as she stepped onto the wraparound porch. Neal sighed in relief and stepped away from the window in order to prepare for her arrival. 

WCWCWC

‘Hope! You home?’ Cam called out as he stepped into the darkened apartment.

‘In here’ she replied, her voice coming from the bedroom.

He made his way to the bedroom door and glanced in to find his fiancée sitting up in bed surrounded by books and magazines, her laptop teetering on a pillow in her lap.

‘You’re back early. I thought you girls would be at it a lot later than this’ he said.

She refrained from responding. Three hours of intense discussion about the most mundane details relating to their upcoming wedding was two hours too many. She had a much shorter list of priorities than her wedding planner had, that was for sure.

Cam ✅  
Family ✅   
Priest ✅ 

Cam walked over and placed a kiss on the top of her head. ‘Where’s Becky?’

‘She’s catching a movie at the Bijou, they were showing Casablanca and she’d never seen it before.’

‘Oh’ Cam replied, hurrying off to the bathroom. She could hear him relieving himself after a night out at the neighbourhood bar with the guys. Sounded like he’d just made it home in time.

‘I’m guessing three or four?’ she called out to him with a chuckle.

He popped his head back into the bedroom, pulling off his t-shirt as he went. ‘Four… you’re getting way too good at this.’

She shrugged, secretly pleased with herself. She’d become quite the expert at evaluating his intake of beer based on his output when he finally got home.

Cam proceeded to strip, leaving his clothes in a pile on the floor. Hope bit her tongue and instead of complaining, she scooted over to make room for him on the bed. He slipped in, wearing nothing but his boxers, expecting to see wedding magazines: bridesmaids dresses, flower arrangements, cakes. Instead, he was staring down at various gardening magazines and some song books with a bunch of post-its sticking out here and there.

‘What’s all this?’

‘I’ve been trying to find places that sell spring flowers already in bloom. We kind of missed out on planting season for spring bulbs.’

He seemed puzzled. 

‘For the church, remember?’

He nodded as he recalled the promise Hope had made to her grandma, that there would be crocuses at the front of the church on their wedding day. He smiled, bringing his arm around her shoulder and squeezing gently.

‘Any luck?’

‘There’s this greenhouse near Mom and Dad’s place’ she began as he smiled. It was funny how, over time, she’d begun to see her parents’ place as… well, her parents’ place. Although it would always be special, she’d begun to think of her home as anywhere she and Cam were together.

‘Is it safe to plant them yet?’

‘I called the nursery and they said one more week and we’ll be pretty well guaranteed there’s no chance of frost.’

He nodded; he knew how important this little detail was for her. She’d made a promise to her grandmother and if there was one thing he knew about his wife-to-be, it was that her word was as good as gold. 

‘And what about these?’ he asked, pointing to the song books.

Hope’s face brightened. ‘I was just looking at some music for the ceremony. Father Bertrand says we need to have everything nailed down a week or two before.’

Cam let his eyes linger on the music book in Hope’s hand - an anthology of Beatles’ songs.

‘My folks had a Beatles song at their wedding’ he commented as he started to peruse the long list of tunes by the Fab Four. ‘I can’t remember which one, though.’

‘Really?’ Hope replied. ‘I think my folks did too. I’ll have to ask my mom.’

‘You know what I’ve always liked?’ Cam said, his mind wandering. ‘That one… you know…’ 

He began to hum although it was impossible to discern any melody whatsoever. 

Hope laughed. ‘Is that a Beatles song?’

‘No, it’s a song they play at a lot of weddings’ he said, returning to his off-key delivery.

‘I have no idea what you’re singing’ she said with a giggle. 

Sadly, she too had been blessed by the ‘tone deaf’ gene; compliments of her mother. Cam moved in and began to tickle her, continuing to hum the unrecognizable tune.

‘Stop! Stop!’ she shouted, as if she were being tortured. 

He paused but carried on singing, looking deep into her eyes, trying to create a ‘moment’.

‘No, not the tickling, silly’ she said with a twinkle in her eye. ‘I meant the singing!’ 

Cam rolled his eyes and carried on, his unsteady voice growing louder as she continued to complain emphatically. He stopped suddenly, dropping his voice an octave as he stared her straight in the eye. 

He brought his lips to her neck and deposited a kiss. ‘Here’s looking at you kid.’

WCWCWC

Neal moved to the main room, turning on the gas fireplace and making sure to set it to ‘heat’. He turned on a few lamps and made his way to the small kitchenette to put the kettle on; Sara might appreciate a nice cup of tea considering she never got to finish the one she’d ordered at dinner. He returned to the bedroom and, noticing a cashmere throw lying on a chair by the bed, he scooped it up and brought it into the main room. He began a search of the cupboards, coming up with some teabags and some instant decaf and preparing two cups, one of each. 

He’d just completed the task when he heard the rattling of the key in the lock. He reached for the soft pale blue throw he’d found in the other room and held it up, just as Sara appeared from behind the door.

Her eyes met his and he could see that the anger that had been there earlier had morphed into a look of resignation; like him, she knew they had to find a way to work out this impass. Somehow. She threw down her purse and, without hesitation, she stepped into Neal’s embrace, letting him wrap both the blanket and his arms around her. He felt her shiver and held her for a moment, rubbing her back and feeling her start to relax. 

‘I made you some tea’ he whispered in her ear.

She stepped away and pulled the throw tighter around her shoulders as she made her way to stand in front of the fire. She rubbed her hands and Neal heard her sigh as she settled at one end of the leather sofa that sat directly across from the brick fireplace. In an instant, she’d kicked off her shoes and tucked her legs underneath her body, her feet both sore and cold. Neal put a smattering of whitener into the coffee cup and walked over to take a seat at the other end of the couch.

‘Thanks’ she said, under her breath as he handed her the cup of tea.

He waited to speak - trying not to make the same mistake he’d made earlier.

Sara giggled nervously. ‘I don’t know what possessed me to take a midnight stroll in my four inch heels.’

He smiled and put his cup down on the table facing them, patting his lap in invitation. Sara settled her back against the arm of the couch and lifted her legs, resting them on his lap and sighing deeply as he began rubbing her feet, starting with her sore toes.

‘You want to start?’ he asked, his voice quiet.

She nodded. ‘Yeah…’

He thought he knew all there was to know about what had happened earlier in the week and as far as he was concerned, she’d done nothing wrong. But her worried eyes told him otherwise.

‘Like I was saying, something happened on Wednesday. At Randall’s place. We were going through some of his art collection’ she began, eager to get everything out in the open. ‘We were upstairs in his bedroom… he’d laid some pieces out on the bed for us to examine.’

Neal listened, determined not to interrupt.

‘While we were up there, he… he tried to kiss me. I pushed him away and I told him I was sorry if he’d gotten the wrong impression but that I had no interest in… you know.’

Neal continued kneading her feet, keeping his gaze steady on her face.

‘When we came downstairs, he started saying how we were good together and that it wouldn't hurt to… take a little stroll down memory lane. I told him that I was happily married and that you and I didn't work that way but he kept saying that nothing would have to change, that no one would ever know.’

Neal stared into her eyes, reliving the words he’d overheard that day. So far, it was exactly how he remembered it. 

‘He kept pressing me, asking if he’d misinterpreted the cues…’ Sara continued, staring off into space. She returned her gaze to Neal. ‘… asking if he’d misread my intentions.’ 

She stopped momentarily, gathering her thoughts.

‘I told him twice to back off, that what I wanted was to keep our relationship strictly professional. But he insisted and he came closer and he tried to kiss me again. I was confused but I reacted spontaneously and I slapped him across the face.’

Neal’s eyes grew in surprise. He hadn’t heard that part of the exchange between his wife and her client.

‘You slapped him?’

She nodded and chuckled nervously. ‘Right across the jaw, left a nice mark too.’

‘What happened?’

‘I thought you said you were there.’

Neal swallowed hard. ‘I was…’ he began. ‘But that was probably around the time Mozzie was tackling me in the mud to keep me from running towards the house.’

She frowned, not quite understanding. But she was on a roll and she wanted to finish what she’d started. 

‘After I slapped him, he backed off and then, before long Mozzie showed up, pretending he’d been sent by my office and that there was some sort of an emergency.’

Neal opened his mouth to speak and Sara put up her hand to stop him.

‘Wait… please’ she said. ‘There’s more.’

Neal frowned. What more could there possibly be?

‘Honey, I haven't been totally honest with you. This… thing that happened with Randy… it didn't happen out of the blue.’

‘What do you mean? The guy was totally out of line Sara. You could have brought charges against him.’

She shook her head and pulled her feet away, tucking them back under her legs. She kneeled in the open space between them, her eyes growing serious.

‘It’s true, he had no right to insist — especially after I’d made it clear I wanted him to stop. But —’ 

She could tell by the look on his face that Neal had no idea what she was about to confess. He waited expectantly for her to continue.

Her voice grew tight as she spoke. ‘Neal, these past few weeks… they’ve been hard on both of us. So much has happened. Before the holidays, you weren't feeling well, you were struggling with your blood pressure medication, then all that stuff happened with Caitlin and with Jesse. And then your mom. I know it’s been hard on you. It’s been hard on me too.’

Neal nodded; things had been rocky for a while now. He was the first to admit he hadn't been feeling like his old self. 

‘Is this about the sex?’ he asked, thinking back to the weeks and months of struggling to get things back on track.

‘Of course not… it’s about everything Neal. I just felt like you weren’t yourself. Remember that day in my office, when you stopped by?’

Of course he remembered. It was the day things had begun to unravel, the day he’d realized, not only that his wife had a past with this guy but that the multimillionaire seemed interested in reliving that past.

‘Things started to change after that, you started acting… insecure. You had your hair done, you started to go to the gym more often… and then you started following me around when I met up with Randy.’ 

Neal listened; he knew she was right. Things had been off-kilter for months now, those feelings of self-doubt gnawing away at him. And things had only gotten worse after he’d seen them together at Sterling Bosch.

‘Then there was that whole thing with the brooch.’

She could see Neal’s gaze hardening; he was becoming defensive. ‘I thought we agreed about the brooch.’

‘We did, honey’ she said, trying to keep things from escalating. ‘It was inappropriate of me to accept it in the first place and I realize that by keeping it from you… well, that only made things worse. But a year ago, you might have thought it was a hoot that one of my clients gave me such an expensive gift. With Randy, it became a major bone of contention between us.’

‘Randall Piper isn’t just any old client Sara.’

She took a sip of tea, determined to keep things from going sideways.

‘I’m not blaming you Neal, really I’m not. I’m just trying to explain things from my point of view. Here was this guy who…’ she stopped and looked intently in his eyes, choosing her words carefully. 

‘…this guy I’d had a past with who was flaunting everything he had, treating me to expensive meals, offering me gifts and for a while there, I was enjoying the fantasy. Then, I’d come home to real life… the kids, the problems with Caitlin, the whole mess with Jesse, your mom, worrying about your health… all those responsibilities. And then on top of everything else, you and I weren't really connecting. You were holding back…’

Neal looked mortally wounded. She was confirming his worst fear; that what she wanted was something he could never give her, something he’d willingly given up for her and the kids.

‘But you’ve always told me that’s not the life you wanted.’

‘It isn't Neal. But I guess I got caught up in the moment and now that I can see more clearly, I realize I haven’t been totally honest with you… or with myself.’

Neal grew restless. He got to his feet, walked over to the kitchenette, set his empty cup in the small sink, all the time avoiding her scrutiny. Sara could see his shoulders droop, his head hanging down.

‘Neal…’ she said, her voice breaking. ‘I love you.’

‘And I love you’ he replied, his back to her.

‘Please look at me’ she pleaded.

He turned to look at her, his face ashen.

‘After what happened on Wednesday, I realize I’d been putting out those vibes and it wasn't surprising that Randy had picked up on them. And then I got scared. I realized how much I love you and the kids, how much I love our life. And I panicked.’

His face softened. ‘Is that what the other night was about?’ he asked, recalling how broken she’d seemed. 

She nodded silently. She heard Neal let out a long slow breath. 

‘I’m sorry. I know I’ve hurt you. I was just banking on him not acting on his impulses and I took us for granted, thinking that no matter what happened, you would always be there.’

‘I am here Sara.’

She looked into his eyes. She could see he was hurt but he was keeping it together, being his old dependable self, the man she loved more than could ever have imagined. He returned to the couch, took his spot again. In that moment, she felt like she didn't deserve him. Tears filled her eyes.

‘There you were, going through a rough patch and instead of standing by you and supporting you, I was only thinking of myself and making things worse for you.’

There was silence but she could see Neal’s gaze softening.

‘Can you forgive me?’ she added, her voice shaky.

‘Can you forgive me?’ he replied. He had a lot to atone for as well: lack of transparency, lying by omission, being deceitful.

Her eyes narrowed as she examined him. She’d been painfully honest and she could see that he needed to do the same.

‘It’s true, I haven't been myself in weeks. Maybe it’s turning sixty, losing my mom all over again, seeing only the drudgery in everyday life. I have this beautiful wife who I’m crazy about and who still makes heads turn. Sometimes I still wonder what you see in me.’

She’d moved from one end of the couch to the other, close enough to touch him now. She leaned in to caress his cheek.

Neal reached up and gently pushed her hand away. He didn’t want any comfort. Not yet. He just wanted to say what he needed to say. 

‘It’s true, that first day in your office when I saw you with him. It was like the perfect storm… so much was happening at home. I got scared. I realized that I couldn’t take you for granted. Here was this guy who had it all and he was looking at you like you were the answer to his prayers.’

‘You didn’t trust me?’ she murmured more of a declaration than a question.

‘It’s not you. At least, it’s not just you. It’s me too. All of a sudden I started having doubts that what we have, what I can give you… that it isn't good enough.’

He could see tears forming in her eyes. ‘I know you can handle yourself around men. You’ve been doing it your whole life. It wasn't about that. I just got it in my head that maybe, just maybe, what you really wanted was to be with him.’

Sara listened and nodded.   
Neal pursed his lips and exhaled. ‘Would you have slept with him?’ he asked. 

She placed her hands on his shoulders.

‘No! Never! When he started coming on strong, I realized what a dangerous game I’d been playing and if I wasn't careful I could lose everything we’ve worked so hard for… us, the kids, everything.’

Neal shook his head. ‘You could never lose me Repo. Never.’

He reached out and took her hands in his, turning sideways on the couch to face her.

‘But all that self-doubt… it got the better of me. Next thing I knew, Mozzie offered to help and… I was only too happy to let him. At first, I tried to convince myself it was recon for that Pollock Peter and I have been chasing.’

‘But I was kidding myself, it wasn’t about that at all and it wasn't about making sure you were safe either although that did play a part. It was really about this… jealousy I’d never really experienced before. I started wondering what he was saying to you when you were alone, what you were saying to him.’

‘Is that how you found out about the brooch in the first place? From Mozzie?’

‘Yeah… He overheard Piper talking about it when you were at his place on the Upper East Side.’

‘Mozzie was watching us even back then?’

‘And listening’ Neal admitted.

‘Oh Neal…’

‘I’m sorry’ he murmured. ‘Then, this week I made things even worse. Mozzie had been watching his place in Southampton for me, reporting about every little detail. He’d set up on the grounds, he was watching and listening.’

‘Did you know he’d put a bug on me?’

Neal let his head drop, realizing how far his little charade had gone. Much too far.

‘Only after the fact. But I didn't try to stop him’ he admitted meekly.

He could see the disappointment in her eyes.

‘That was bad enough but on Wednesday, curiosity got the better of me and I drove out there to see for myself. I watched you for a while, I heard him come on to you and I heard you turn him down. Moz and I were hiding behind some bushes in a little clearing and I could see you through binoculars, sitting at the dining room table. I saw him get close to you and touch your hair…’

Sara let her gaze drop onto her lap, seemingly embarrassed.

‘I just lost it. I don’t know what I was more afraid of, what might happen if you tried to stop him or that maybe… you wouldn’t try to stop him at all. I went a little crazy and Mozzie had to tackle me to keep me from running in there. I made him promise to get you out of there safely. I kept thinking about…’

Neal let the words hang but Sara knew exactly what he was referring to. He grew emotional, recalling the horrible hours his wife had spent in captivity, drugged and sexually molested. 

‘I can’t help myself babe. Whenever I think about it…’

‘Neal, that’s all in the past. I’m strong… I feel totally in control. And I like to think I know Randall well enough to know that in the end, he would have accepted a hard no from me.’

Neal cleared his throat. ‘Anyway, Moz and I concocted something so that Mozzie could give you an out and keep me out of it.’

Sara continued, filling in the blanks. ‘And I made Mozzie promise not to tell you what he’d heard in exchange for not ratting him out. I tried to tell myself it was because I didn't want you to worry. But the truth is, I was ashamed of my part in leading Randy on. That’s what I really wanted to keep from you.’

They were back to looking into each other’s eyes, their hands intertwined.

‘We’re a fine pair, huh?’ Sara finally said with a strangled laugh.

‘Twenty-five years next year’ Neal said with a sad smile. ‘You’d think this kind of stuff would be behind us for good.’

‘I guess in some strange, twisted way it just shows how much we love each other, what we mean to each other.’

‘Still… I’m sorry Repo. I was wrong to let my insecurities get in the way. I should have known I can trust you completely.’

‘And I should have seen the signs, talked to you about how I was feeling.’

She sat up and brought her hands to cup his face.

‘Are we good?’ he asked, his voice trembling.

‘We will be’ she replied with a gentle smile. ‘Just give us a little bit of time.’

Her mind wandered and she chuckled, self-deprecatingly. ‘You know that’s the second time in two months I’ve left you sitting alone in a restaurant. I’ve got to stop doing that.’

Neal gave her an eyebrow wag. ‘At least we made it all the way to dessert this time.’

She leaned in, placed a gentle kiss on his lips. 

‘Speaking of dessert’ Neal said, getting to his feet. He reached for the covered plate he’d ordered up from room service, removing the lid with a flourish and revealing a serving of the pavlova she’d been coveting earlier.

‘Now that’s what’s called sweetening the deal’ she said with a smile.

He scooped up a spoonful of the luscious meringue and brought it to his wife’s lips, lifting it as if he were making a toast.

‘Here’s to improved communication between the two of us’ he said.

She nodded and opened her mouth, humming as the sweetness hit her tongue.

‘To better communication’ she replied. 

TBC


	72. Chapter 72

Peter hadn’t seen the trademark swagger in a while. It was accompanied by a broad smile and that twinkle he hadn't seen in his partner’s eyes over the past few months.

‘You’re looking well rested!’ he commented, looking up from the mountain of paperwork on his desk. ‘I guess that weekend getaway really paid off.’

Neal settled across from him and put his feet up on his desk, looking years younger. Peter had a fleeting flashback to his young CI, barging into his office and acting like he owned the place. 

Except in this case, Neal really did own the place.

Neal set down the brown paper package he’d carried in and grinned widely. 

‘It was amazing’ he said. ‘If you’re ever looking for a nice place to take Elizabeth, I highly recommend it.’

Peter raised his eyebrows and grinned. Good old Neal, it was nice to have him back.

‘So what’d you do, drink some magic potion while you were there?’

‘No potion. Just some fresh air, some sunshine and the company of my beautiful wife. The weather was great, we went hiking, had a couple of great meals, used the spa… got pedicures’ he said pointing to his feet and wagging his eyebrows.

He leaned across and feigned untying his shoes so he could show off his toes. Peter waved him away.

‘Pass’ he grumbled. ‘When you didn't pop in yesterday, I thought you might never be coming back.’

‘Naw, we just stayed an extra night and drove back yesterday morning. Sara had some stuff she needed to take care of.’

He tapped the package he’d brought in with his fingertip, trying his best to look mysterious and waiting to be asked the obvious question.

‘Okay, I’ll bite’ Peter said. ‘What’s in the package?’

‘What package?’ Neal replied with a look of pure Caffrey innocence.

‘Seriously? You want to play games? I’ve got invoices to go over, class registrations to process… a new exhibit coming in’ Peter said, pointing to the mound of papers covering his desk.

‘Oh, is that the new Orville Kensick collection?’ Neal asked, his eyes mischievous.

‘Neal!’

‘What?’ he replied with that look he always got when he knew he’d gotten the upper hand.

‘Look inside’ he finally said as Peter continued to glare at him.

The package was approximately eighteen by ten, flat - some painting no doubt. Peter frowned and reached for it while Neal continued to gloat. 

Annoyingly so.

‘This is Number 27!’ Peter cried out in amazement as he peeked inside. ‘Where’d you get this?’

Neal continued to smile broadly, pleased with himself. ‘It’s the original Randall Piper claims he bought from a private collector five years ago.’

Peter was already looking it over, reaching for his glasses for a better look. 

‘Well?’ he finally said. ‘Is it?’

‘Don’t know yet but I thought you and I could head on over to the Bureau and pull out the one from the Pruitt, put them side by side, see if anything jumps out at us.’

Peter’s eyes grew wide with excitement. He’d all but forgotten the little mystery Jones had tasked them with. Suddenly, he too was feeling years younger, his heart pumping at the thought of cracking a case. 

He grabbed his jacket and slipped it on, calling for Cameron as he got to his feet.

‘Cam!’ he shouted over his shoulder.

‘Yup’ the young man replied from the back room.

‘I have to go out for a while!’

WCWCWC

Hope stepped into the kitchen and pursed her lips to keep from smiling. Her mom was sitting at the kitchen table, fully engrossed, her laptop open and a cup of coffee by her side. Oh, but it wasn't the laptop or the ass ugly ceramic mug she insisted on using - the one Liam had made for her in third grade - that made her smile. 

It was something else altogether - it was the amusing sight of her mom having set aside her vanity long enough to slip on those reading glasses she hated so much. Sara looked up at her daughter as she entered the room; apparently, she’d forgotten she was wearing them.

‘Hi honey!’ she called out, eyes immediately returning to her computer screen. ‘How’d you sleep?’

‘Okay’ came the reply.

Hope headed straight for the coffee pot, glancing briefly in her mom’s direction. Her half-moon readers were perched on the tip of her nose and Hope forced herself to refrain from commenting. Now that she was well into her fifties, Sara Ellis couldn't read a damn thing without them but she was obstinate and refused to wear them unless it was absolutely necessary. Worse yet, she would go to incredible lengths to have you believe she didn't really need them. 

Hope would never tell her but she’d noticed some fresh new wrinkles in the corner of her mom’s eyes - a result of all the squinting she did to avoid slipping on the reading specs. Over time, Hope had seen her mom do just about anything to avoid wearing them, especially in public. When her parents went out to dinner, she’d pretend to forget them at home or in the car or in her other purse and she’d make Neal read the whole menu to her out loud. It drove him nuts. 

‘Damn it Sara… next time bring the goddamn things with you’ he would grumble.

Whenever one of the kids gave her a birthday or Mother’s Day card, Sara would sit and stare for the longest time, she’d squint and then smile as if she’d managed to read the message - which she had most certainly not. Hope recalled the year her mom had attempted to make her dad one of his favourite desserts for their anniversary - crême brulée. She’d been too pig-headed to wear her glasses and had mistakenly sprinkled salt instead of sugar on top, then had had the gall to complain that the sugar wouldn't brown properly. She even ate the damn thing as if nothing were amiss, too embarrassed to admit her mistake.

Hope wandered over and poured herself a cup of coffee. ‘So, what are you doing home anyway? I thought you would have left for the office hours ago.’

‘Mr. Bosch wants my comments on this recovery by noon and there are just too many distractions at the office’ Sara replied, suddenly remembering she had the blasted things on her nose and removing them abruptly. 

Hope took her cup and was headed in the direction of the family room when Sara caught her by the arm.

‘Hey, where you going? I want to hear all about the wedding planning. What did I miss while Daddy and I were away?’

Hope pointed to the open laptop and Sara snapped it shut decisively. ‘Come on, sit. This can wait five minutes.’

Hope sighed loudly and took a seat. The whole wedding planning thing was really weighing on her. Again, she wondered why she and Cam hadn't just eloped. She looked up at her mom’s smiling face: that was definitely one of the reasons why. Neither she nor Cam could imagine doing this without their families.

‘Mom…’ Hope said tentatively. ‘Aunt Elizabeth helped you with your wedding, right?’

Sara nodded and smiled as she recalled the craziness of the weeks preceding her and Neal’s wedding.

‘Did it… get a little nuts?’

Sara sighed as she let her mind wander back over twenty years before. ‘Maybe… I guess. Don’t forget you were only three months old. I think I was more focussed on being a new mom than getting married. Your dad was still with the FBI and even though we had some definite ideas about things like our vows and the music… well, to be honest, we deferred to El for a lot of the other stuff. Frankly neither one of us was all that big on all the fuss.’

‘But… did she suggest things you didn't agree with?’ Hope asked, tiptoeing around the subject.

She loved her godmother and knew she would do just about anything for her but Elizabeth Burke’s idea of a wedding was a lot more involved than Hope had ever imagined… or wanted.

‘I’m trying to remember’ Sara said. ‘Once we’d decided to have it at Grandma June’s, things got a lot easier. Daddy and I gave her a guest list and to be honest, we kind of let her run with it.’

Hope sat in silence nursing her cup of coffee.

‘Honey, is your aunt Elizabeth pressuring you to do things you’re not comfortable with?’

‘Maybe… I know she means well and she has so many great ideas but… Mom, don’t get me wrong, I’m really excited about our wedding day, but it’s not just about the day itself, you know what I mean?’

Sara shook her head; she wasn't following.

‘I’m excited about sharing the day with you and Dad and Liam and Caitlin and Cam’s family. But Mom, it’s only one day in our lives. I’m a lot more excited about being married to Cam and getting to share my life with him, making plans together for the future, thinking ahead to the next seventy years of being together.’

‘Seventy years, huh?’ Sara grinned. What a wise kid she and Neal had raised. ‘You’re right, some people put all their energy into their wedding day when they should be focussing on what they’re about to embark on. There’s a lot of hype out there for everything to be perfect for that one day.’

‘And I want it to be perfect too, just… not the same kind of perfect as Aunt Elizabeth wants.’

‘Like?’ Sara prodded.

‘Well, there’s all this talk about the dinner. Aunt Elizabeth has all these grandiose ideas and Cam and I just want to keep in simple… and the bridesmaids dresses, she thinks they should all be the same…’

‘And what do you think?’

‘Mom, Caitlin is like five foot nothing, Olivia is almost six feet tall and Becky is somewhere in the middle… Caitlin and Liv are blond and Becky is dark. Nothing will suit all of them.’

‘Okay’ Sara said, leaning in to listen.

‘They’ve all seen dresses they really like but they’re different and frankly… I don’t care what they wear as long as they’re happy.’

Sara could see that her little girl was struggling and frankly, she’d been around her best friend long enough to know how annoying it could be when El got something in her head.

‘What about if you and I make a list of the must-haves for you, try to push everything else aside so we can see a little more clearly’ Sara suggested.

She pulled out a writing pad and a pen.

‘Mom… what about your report?’ Hope said, pointing to the laptop.

Sara gave a loud tsk. ‘It’s fine. Mr. Bosch has been waiting for this report for a week, another few hours won’t kill him. Now, what are the most important things for you?’

‘That our families be there, that everybody have fun, that I get those flowers planted in the garden outside the church for Grandma… that Cam show up… and the priest. We need the priest there.’

Sara chuckled. ‘What about food?’

Hope shrugged, once again, looking overwhelmed. Sara took her hand and squeezed. 

‘It’s okay honey… I remember when you first told us you were getting married at the church, you said something about an Italian restaurant nearby.’

Hope’s face lit up. ‘Robbie’s… it’s not very fancy but the food is great and it’s one of our favourite restaurants. They have this big party room downstairs and Cam’s friend Tito is a DJ and he said he’d be glad to do the music.’ 

‘Robbie’s’ Sara repeated as she jotted it down. ‘See? That wasn't so hard.’

‘But Aunt Elizabeth and I went to have a look. She said it’s a little too plain for a wedding.’

‘So? It’s not El’s wedding, it’s yours.’

Hope sighed. ‘But… I don’t want to hurt her feelings.’

‘Honey, you’re not going to hurt her feelings. This is what she does for a living. My guess is she’s just trying to give you as many options as she can. Some brides want a whole lot of hoopla but it doesn't have to be like that if you don’t want it to.’

‘She said, traditionally the bride gets walked down the aisle by her dad but it would mean a lot to me if you would both do it.’

She could see the emotion in her mom’s eyes. ‘Really?’ Sara said, her voice tight. ‘I would love to walk you down the aisle sweetie.’

Newly empowered, Hope pointed to the pad of paper, urging Sara to write it down.

‘So what’s happening with your dress’ she asked her mom.

‘I’m still wavering between the ivory and gold and the lilac. And your dad has been no help at all’ Sara said, rolling her eyes. ‘By the way, Auntie Em is coming this weekend, she’s going to help me decide. Why don’t the three of us go together and you can tell me which one you like?’

‘But what about Auntie Elizabeth, won’t she be upset if we don’t invite her to come along?’

Sara patted her daughter’s hand, suddenly realizing she was talking about choosing a mother of the bride dress for her baby girl’s wedding. Where had the years gone?

‘You let me worry about your aunt Elizabeth, okay? We can talk to her together.’

Hope nodded and pointed to the pad again, urging her mom to jot it down. Sara squinted, struggling to write without the help of her glasses. 

‘Oh and Mom’ Hope said, picking them up off the table and handing them to her. ‘Why don’t you try with these?’

WCWCWC

Liam sat up on the edge of the bed in his dorm room, staring across the room at Josh Monteith, seemingly sound asleep.

‘Josh’ he called out softly. ‘Josh, you want to get something to eat?’

Silence. If the mention of food didn't wake him, it was a sure bet that nothing would.

Liam got to his feet and walked over to the desk, grabbing his wallet, pulling out his student card and sticking it in his back jeans pocket. He had a big game in five hours and needed a good solid meal to sustain him. He’d meet up with a few of the guys at the cafeteria; Josh would catch up with them eventually.

He had barely opened the door when he let out a yelp as he came face to face with Cody Miller, his fist up in the air, preparing to knock.

‘Cody! What the hell are you doing here?’

The other man stared back, a big smile on his face. ‘Surprise!’

Liam’s arms were instantly around his neck, hugging him tight as Cody struggled to remain standing.

‘What’s going on?’ Liam repeated as he stepped back to get a better look at his boyfriend. Man, he looked amazing! 

Behind him, he could hear Josh grumbling - awakened from his beauty sleep.

‘Come on in’ Liam said, pulling Cody into the room.

Josh sat up, his long legs dangling off the bed, his hair mussed, his face confused.

‘Cody, you remember Josh, our star guard’ Liam said, pointing to his roomie.

Josh was instantly on his feet, his six foot six frame towering over Cody. ‘Hey man, it’s good to see you again.’

‘How’re you doing Josh? Sorry to show up unexpected.’

He slid his arm around Liam’s waist as Liam brought his arm to rest around his boyfriend’s shoulder. He kept staring at him, both shocked and thrilled to have him appear out of nowhere.

‘I was just on my way to get something to eat’ Liam said. ‘We’ve got a game tonight.’

Cody lifted his overnight bag. ‘I know, that’s why I’m here. Thought I’d surprise you and drive up for the big game.’

Again, Liam could have been knocked over with a feather. ‘What about school?’

‘I don’t have a class until tomorrow afternoon…’ 

Liam’s mind was reeling. It would be close to midnight before the coaches set them free for the night and he wanted some quality time with Cody before he hit the road in the morning. His mind immediately went to their sleeping arrangements; they couldn't very well spend the night together in his twin bed with Josh a few feet away.

As if he could read his mind, Cody blurted out. ‘I saw this little place a couple of miles down the road… Carson’s Motel? Thought I could stay there tonight.’

‘Eewww!’ Josh cried out. ‘Not the Creepy Carson! My folks stayed there the last time they were here. Apparently, the cockroaches are the size of small puppies.’

Cody shrugged.

‘Yeah, there’s another place a little further up the road’ Liam said. ‘Dad said it was good… We’ll figure it out.’

‘Want to come with us and grab a bite to eat?’ he asked his roomie. He gave him the silent ‘come, don’t come’ glare, not terribly subtle.

‘You know what? I think I have about another thirty minutes left on that nap’ he said, pointing to his bed. Smart guy.

The boys were out the door before Josh’s head had even hit the pillow. They headed down the hallway and out the door, gunning for the commons building, home of the cafeteria among other things. Liam needed to tank up before the big game. It was the first time Cody had driven up to see him - a momentous occasion. They both stacked up their food trays, Liam going for the high carb meal he always had before a game. They found a private spot and settled in for their feast.

Liam couldn't take his eyes off the other man, a perpetual smile pasted on his face. ‘Why didn't you tell me you were coming?’

‘What part of ‘I wanted to surprise you’ don’t you get?’

Liam’s mind was working overtime and moving in directions he hadn't expected, namely how and when he could get his hands on the gorgeous hunk sitting across from him.

He checked his watch. ‘On game days, the coach likes us to check in around 5:00 and start preparing… you know, there’s always a team meeting and…’

Cody reached out and touched his hand. ‘Hey, don’t worry about it. I’ll wait for you after the game and then, I’ll whisk you off to Shangri-La and we can spend some quality time —’

‘Oh shit!’ Liam shouted, out the blue.

Cody could see his gaze fixated on something over his left shoulder and he’d begun to turn in that direction when Liam warned him off. 

‘No, no, no, no, no, don’t do that’ he said with urgency.

‘What? What is it?’

Liam gave a little wave and Cody watched him as his face grew tense.

‘What…’

‘Oh great!’ Liam said under his breath.

WCWCWC

It was game night at the old Caffrey homestead. Neal tried his best to catch every single one of Liam’s basketball games and more often than not, Peter joined him. It was still a novelty to be able to sit back and watch your son playing college basketball on television and Neal didn't want to miss a single moment. He'd never been much for college sports, or any televised sports for that matter, but having a gifted son with extraordinary talent had changed all that. Peter was thrilled to have his best friend to share one of his passions with, although Neal drew the line at basketball - more specifically, Orange basketball.

Some nights, like this particular April evening, the stars aligned and the whole family gathered, making it a more elaborate event. Neal was busy preparing some snacks, worthy of a Super Bowl party: nachos, chicken wings, munchies, dips. He was working on an artichoke dip when he heard the front door open.

‘Babe?’ he called out from the back of the house.

‘Yeah it’s me’ Sara said, appearing in a two piece suit in a beautiful shade of turquoise.

She walked over to him, grabbing a shrimp on the way and popping it in her mouth. She slid her arms around his neck and kissed him soundly.

‘You look amazing’ he commented as he pulled away to get a better look at her. ‘I don’t remember this little number, when did you get that?’

‘Last month… but I hadn't had a chance to wear it yet.’

‘I like…’ Neal said with a mischievous smile.

Their weekend away had done wonders for them. They’d spent hours talking, taking long walks, going over everything that had happened over the last few months, putting their marriage back on solid ground. They’d both walked away feeling lighter, better connected.

‘So, is this what’s passing as dinner tonight?’ she asked, pointing to the mountain of food on the kitchen counter. 

‘Everybody’s coming over to watch the game’ Neal explained.

He stopped what he was doing and turned towards her, crowding her up against the kitchen counter.

‘Guess what?’ he said with a look of mischief.

‘The Pollock?’

He nodded. ‘Piper’s is a fake’ he said with just the right amount of smugness.

‘You’re kidding!’

‘I still want a second opinion but from what I can tell, the one from the Pruitt has all the markings of the real thing.’

‘Wow…’ Sara said, surprised.

She’d talked Randy into having the painting evaluated. Of course she hadn't mentioned that Neal was involved in the case of the duelling Pollocks but then again, it was her job to properly assess the value of his art. And besides, she was glad to do this for her husband; she owed him at least that much.

‘So, his is a knock-off.’  
Neal shrugged. ‘A good one, though.’

She grew thoughtful. The long process of evaluating Randall Piper’s many treasures was finally coming to an end and she couldn't be happier. She’d entrusted Lydia with finishing things up in Southampton while she started writing the report. She felt strangely liberated not to have to be face to face with the man every day.

‘I’m going to go change. Are the Burkes coming?’

‘They’ll be here at 7:00 and Cam and Hope are coming over too.’

‘What about Caitlin?’

‘Yup, on her way.’

WCWCWC

Caitlin sat on the city bus, staring out at the busy streets below. She was still recovering from her emotional afternoon. Although she hadn't told anyone, she’d decided to pay her brother a visit at the Westchester County Jail. Call it morbid curiosity or perhaps closure. The siblings had been on a roller coaster ride ever since he’d shown up on the Caffreys’ doorstep. Lately, she’d been feeling torn about her feelings and she needed some kind of resolution. Jesse had caused nothing but heartache for her foster family and she needed to see for herself if he was showing any remorse for all the hurt he’d caused.

She’d been disappointed but not surprised to find that Jesse was still defiant, still spouting the old rhetoric about how life had done him wrong, how the Caffreys were scum, how he’d been tricked by them. There was no doubt that destiny had dealt both Somersby kids a tough hand and that of the two, she’d been by far the luckiest. But she’d done all she could, giving him one chance after another to turn over a new leaf and he’d wanted nothing to do with her. Now she had to think about herself and her future. 

One thing she’d learned throughout the whole ordeal was where her true allegiances lied. The Caffreys were her family, maybe not in the strictest sense of the word but in every way that really mattered. She had been lucky to cross their paths and to have been given the opportunity at a full life. Now it was up to her to decide what she did with that opportunity.

Her phone buzzed and she glanced down; a text from her foster dad.

‘Hurry! Making those spring rolls you like.’

She smiled. She was going home. 

WCWCWC

The family room was abuzz, the noise through the roof as the extended Caffrey family cheered on the hometown boy. As far as rookies went, Liam had become the talk of the league. He wasn't the tallest or the strongest but he was the Orange’s best weapon when it came to sneaking up to the basket. He was the team’s high scorer thus far this season, third in the league, and Neal couldn't help but brag and preen every chance he got. By half time, Syracuse was ahead by twelve points and the volume had grown even louder as everyone discussed this play or that, Liam’s prowess and rapidity, their odds of winning the game. 

Only the ladies pulled away to take a break from the loud banter. 

‘So Hope was telling me you made a lot of headway this weekend with the planning’ Sara said as she and Elizabeth carried empty glasses into the kitchen.

‘Yeah, it’s looking good. We still need to find a nice venue for the meal though. I’ve reached out to a couple of my contacts. See what’s out there on short notice.’ 

Sara took a deep breath; it was time to speak up for her daughter. ‘Hope was telling me how she really likes Robbie’s… over on Calvert.’

Elizabeth looked up at her best friend; she could feel the tension in Sara’s voice. 

‘It’s so… ordinary’ she said.

Sara kept looking straight at her, not giving an inch and Elizabeth couldn't help but notice her piercing gaze. 

‘What? You think it’s a good place for a wedding?’

‘It’s not about what I think’ Sara replied.

Hope stepped up, arms loaded up with empty plates; she could feel the tension between her mom and her aunt and she had a pretty good idea what they were discussing.

‘What’s not about what you think?’ she asked innocently enough. 

‘Your mom was telling me that you really like Robbie’s… for the wedding.’

Hope smiled and nodded; it was time for her to speak her mind. ‘Yeah, I was thinking we could go tomorrow and make a deposit.’

El was finally clueing in; maybe she’d been a little too forceful. She put her arm around her goddaughter. 

‘If that’s what you want’ she said with a smile. ‘That’s what we’ll do.’

‘What’s what we’ll do?’ Neal asked as he sneaked up and brought his arm to rest around his wife’s shoulder.

‘Hope and Cam have decided on a place for their wedding dinner’ Sara said. ‘Robbie’s.’

‘Robbie’s…’ Neal said, reflecting and turning to look at his daughter. ‘Oh, that’s a nice place sweet pea, Peter and I had lunch there not too long ago. Amazing cannelloni.’

Peter was suddenly there, joining the group. ‘Who has amazing cannelloni?’

‘You know that place on Calvert where we had lunch with Jones a few weeks back?’

‘Oh, Robbie’s?’ Peter asked, reaching for a handful of chips and stuffing them in his mouth. He looked over at his wife and goddaughter. ‘That might be a nice place for your wedding.’

Cameron and Caitlin joined the group, totally oblivious to the discussion. Cam stood behind Hope, his arms laced around her waist.

‘What’s everybody talking about?’ 

Sara glanced at her daughter and gave her a discreet wink.

WCWCWC

Cody sat, surrounded by strangers, in the friends and family section of the Carrier Dome. The team had just taken to the court for the second half of the game but he only had eyes for number 17, rookie Liam Caffrey. Like Neal, Cody wasn't all that big on sports - any sports - but he was big on Liam and the truth was he would follow him to the ends of the earth to watch him play tiddlywinks if that’s what it took to be near him. He smiled as he recalled their earlier encounter with Todd Greenway. The man was nothing like he’d imagined. He’d seemed nice enough and Cody had spent ten minutes reassuring Liam that everything was fine. He admitted to having felt a healthy dose of jealousy a few months back but that was all behind them now. 

The crowd cheered and he returned his attention to the game just in time to see Liam make his way to the basket, his teammates covering for him as he went. Then, in the blink of an eye, there was a collision and Liam was on the ground, struggling to get up. Cody got to his feet, craning his neck to get a better look. It took a couple of minutes and the crowd erupted in applause as Liam got to his feet, helped by Josh and another one of their teammates. They escorted him back to the bench where the coach was instantly leaning down to talk to him.

Cody sat down again and watched as Liam settled on the bench. He no longer had any interest in the game, his eyes glued on his boyfriend. Liam avoided looking in Cody’s direction, his mind focussed on the questions the coach was throwing at him.

He spent the rest of the game gathering splinters on the bench and by the time it was all over, he’d needed Josh’s help to make it back to the change room.

WCWCWC

Neal sat up in bed with the phone on his lap, tapping his fingertips insistently on the screen.

‘Call!’ Sara urged.

‘Babe, it’s not even midnight yet. He’ll call as soon as he can. He knows we’ll be worrying about him.’

‘Do you think they sent him to the hospital?’

‘I don’t know honey’ he managed to say with a tinge of impatience.

‘What do you think — ’

‘Sara!’ he said, cutting her off and taking a deep, calming breath.

He brought his arm to rest around her shoulder; he knew she was just worried. 

‘Let’s give him another ten minutes, okay? I’m sure he’ll call as soon as he can.’

‘At least they didn't take him off the court on a stretcher.’

‘From what I could tell, it looked like a concussion’ Neal said; he’d certainly had his fair share of the ‘concussion experience’ - although not on the basketball court.

He brought his lips to rest on the top of her head. ‘He’ll be fine. It isn't his first injury and it won’t be his last.’

‘But what if…’

‘Honey, please!’ Neal erupted, his tone curt. ‘Stop. You’re not making this any easier.’

She finally settled and closed her eyes, willing herself to calm down. She placed her head on his shoulder and tried her best to hold her tongue.

That lasted about twenty seconds. 

‘Now?’ she asked.

Neal sighed and chuckled quietly. He took the phone and punched in the familiar number.

‘Fine.’

WCWCWC

Cody supported Liam’s weight as the two men made their way into room 314 of the Sleep Tight Hotel. Liam easily had twenty pounds on his boyfriend - all solid muscle. He held on tight, as Cody navigated them through the narrow doorway.

‘Careful’ Cody warned, clinging to Liam as he stepped over the lip at the bottom of the door jamb.

Liam’s breathing was loud and halting and if he hadn’t just been seen and properly diagnosed by the team doctor, Cody would have insisted on a visit to the emergency room.

‘You got it’ he said reassuringly as the men made it to the bed.

He deposited him on the edge and threw his overnight bag next to him, returning to close the door and lock up for the night.

‘Do you want some water babe?’

Liam nodded but kept his eyes closed, feeling dizzy. He mumbled something and Cody turned to face him. 

‘What?’

‘I think I’m going to throw up again’ Liam mumbled.

Cody rushed to his side, helping him up as Liam tried to fight him off. 

‘No’ he grumbled. ‘You are not watching me puke.’

‘News flash. I’m not leaving you on your own’ Cody countered. ‘You heard what the doctor said, I need to keep an eye on you.’

He helped to ease Liam onto his knees in front of the toilet and stood back as he retched, his hand on his back, rubbing gently.

Liam reached back to push him away and Cody moved to the sink, getting a glass of water for him. Liam flushed and sat up, leaning against the wall as Cody appeared by his side, armed with the glass of water.

Liam looked up at him with one eye closed; the light was really bothering him.

‘Sorry’ he mumbled, letting his head fall on the other man’s shoulder.

Cody kissed the top of his head. ‘Hey, I’m just glad I was here. I would have been worried sick watching that from home.’

Liam took a few halting breaths. ‘Speaking of which, I should probably call my folks and let them know I’m all right.’

‘All right? There’s a relative term if I ever heard one. Come on, lean on me. I’ll get you into bed.’

‘Normally, that would get me all excited…’ Liam said, half heartedly.

Cody chuckled and helped Liam to his feet, dragging him along until they both fell onto the bed.

Cody proceeded to undress him, starting with his shoes, coaxing him to lift up his hips so he could remove his pants.

‘Sorry’ Liam mumbled. ‘I was looking forward to a real reunion.’ 

‘What are you talking about? This is a real reunion. We’re together, that’s all that matters.’

Just as his pants hit the ground, the familiar sound of his phone chirped, interrupting the silence.

‘I wonder who that could be?’ Liam said sarcastically as Cody reached in and pulled the phone out of his pants pocket.

The image of Neal Caffrey appeared on the screen.

‘Hey Mr. Caffrey!’ Cody chirped, trying to sound chill.

‘Cody? Is that you?’

‘Guilty as charged’ he replied. ‘And before you ask, he’s fine. I drove up for the game, I’m with him right now and I’ll be keeping an eye on him so you don’t need to worry.’

There was silence for a moment as Neal ostensibly asked for details. Cody continued to run his hand through Liam’s hair as he gave him the 411, Liam letting himself melt in his boyfriend’s touch.

‘The team doctor checked him out; he said it’s a concussion but he’ll be fine in a couple of days. The good news is they gave him a few days off.’

Pause. ‘Yeah, yeah, here he is.’

Liam forced his eyes open. ‘Hey Dad’ he said, his voice slurred.

‘Oh, sorry Mom… and Dad’ he added as Neal’s voice came on the line.

It took a few minutes to convince both of them that he would survive but the fact that Cody was there with him seemed to reassure them. Neal asked to speak to Cody again and Liam handed him the phone.

By the time Cody had hung up, Liam was sound asleep in his arms.

TBC


	73. Chapter 73

‘Lift up your arms’ Sara said.

Caitlin did as she was told as Sara stood back and examined the hemline of her bridesmaid’s dress.

‘There you go, it’s perfect now’ she said tugging gently on the hem. ‘You know that colour is really gorgeous on you honey.’

Caitlin grinned and continued examining herself in the full length mirror as she teetered on a pair of heels. ‘How do you walk around in these things all day, every day?’ she asked.

Sara chuckled. ‘I guess you just get used to it.’

‘I don’t want to get used to it’ Caitlin grumbled.

‘Well, it might be tricky running around after the day care kids in those’ Sara agreed. ‘Now, take off the dress so you don't get it dirty.’

Caitlin obeyed, laying the gorgeous taffeta dress carefully on her bed and slipping into a pair of jeans and a t-shirt. 

‘What time are we getting together tonight?’

‘I’m not sure’ Sara replied. ‘It’s all pretty loosey-goosey at the moment. Hope doesn't want anything too formal just some wine and appetizers.’

‘Right…’ Caitlin said, wagging her eyebrows.

‘I mean it. Don’t even go there. It’s the night before her wedding and we need to respect her wishes. All right?’

Sara picked up the dress and hung it up behind Caitlin’s bedroom door. ‘Stockings?’ she asked.

‘I’m picking some up on my way back.’

‘So, you're still planning on visiting Jesse this afternoon?’ 

For the past few weeks, Caitlin had been visiting her brother in prison, intent on keeping the lines of communication open between them. Mostly, when she visited, he just sat there and brooded, complained about the food, how his cellmate snored loudly, how bored he was but the last time, he’d actually asked her how things were going for her at work. The visits were short and no more than once a week but Caitlin was determined to keep trying… at least for now.

‘Just for a little while’ Caitlin replied. ‘Do you think it bothers Mr. C that I’m still making the effort to see him?’

Sara placed her hand on her foster daughter’s arm. ‘No, I don’t. You know Neal, he’s the least spiteful person I’ve ever seen. Everybody should have a chance at redemption, he knows that better than anyone.’

‘I just don’t want either one of you to think I’m siding with Jesse… because I’m not!’

Sara shook her head. ‘Nobody thinks that honey. He’s your only brother… we get it. Just don’t let him get inside your head, all right?’

Caitlin nodded. There was noise coming from the hallway outside her room and she turned in that direction. 

‘I’m going to go give Hope a hand packing the last of her things’ she said, hugging Sara as she ran out of her room.

She jogged past her foster parents’ bedroom on her way to the third floor, waving to Neal who was sitting on the bed, surrounded by a dozen or so ties. Sara appeared, finding him exactly where she’d left him almost an hour earlier and with that same perplexed look on his face.

‘Babe, I was wondering… should I try to match your dress with my tie?’ he asked as she stepped into the room. ‘Because this gold one…’

‘Neal, what are you doing?’ she said, spying the mess on the bed. ‘We’ve been through this, you’re good.’

She lifted the new tie he’d bought earlier in the week, a gorgeous deep red silk tie that was a beautiful match for the suit he’d be wearing. 

‘Stop agonizing. This one is perfect with your grey suit. Look, you even have the matching pocket square’ she added, admiring his recent purchase.

‘I know but…’

She smiled, shook her head; Neal was such a perfectionist when it came to clothes, second guessing himself until the very last minute.

‘I’m telling you, it’s perfect, now stop it’ she said, trying her best to dismiss his doubts. ‘Anyway, you don’t want to show up the groom, do you?’

She laced her arms around his waist and looked up at him with a warm smile.

‘This is the perfect father of the bride tie. Don’t try so hard or everybody will be looking at you instead of our beautiful daughter.’

He rolled his eyes and threw the handful of ties aside, getting to his feet. 

‘So, who’s going to be at Cam’s place tonight?’ she asked, beginning the job of tidying up the mess he’d left behind.

‘He said he’d invited his dad, his brothers, Peter, Liam, Cody, Will, a couple of guys from the gallery and some of his university buddies. I think that’s about it.’

‘That’s a lot of people crammed into that small apartment’ Sara commented.

Neal shrugged. ‘He wanted to keep thing simple. Beer, pizza, chicken wings. Early night he said.’

‘Did you get your… beer?’

He cut her off. ‘It’s already in the car.’

‘And you’re feeling okay about it?’

Having alcohol free beer while the others were imbibing the real stuff was annoying, nothing more. Ever since he’d had that glass of wine a few weeks back, Neal had managed to put alcohol out of his mind. He’d checked in with Jim McDougall upon returning from their weekend getaway and he was feeling good about partaking of a glass of champagne in a toast to the newlyweds the next day. He was feeling in control, sure of himself.

‘Yeah, I think—’

There was a distinctive rumbling as Cam ran down the stairs from the third floor, followed by a loud crash as the box he was carrying tumbled all the way down to the second floor landing. Neal and Sara looked at each other with concern.

‘Was that an earthquake?’ she asked as they stepped out of the room to check on him.

‘All good!’ Cameron called out from outside their bedroom. ‘Just a box of books.’

Sara watched as he collected the books that had fallen out and continued on his way as if nothing had happened. 

‘Will you please be careful’ she called out after him. ‘The last thing you want is to be reciting your vows with a cast on your leg.’

‘I’m going to go check on Hope’ Neal said, walking past them and up the stairs to the third floor. 

He crossed paths with Caitlin who was on her way down, carrying a box of odds and ends: canvasses, brushes, paints, other art paraphernalia.

Upstairs, he found Hope sitting on her bed, surrounded by a mountain of clothes, several pairs of shoes and piles of books. She was holding a photo album in her lap, oblivious to the mess around her. He chuckled; she looked like a fairy princess, totally relaxed as her peons did all the work around her. 

‘Hey sweet pea!’ he called out as he stepped into her room. ‘What are you up to?’

‘Just packing a few last minute things’ she said, glancing up a him.

‘Remember this Daddy?’ she said with a smile, pointing to the album on her lap.

She slid over and made room for him on the bed beside her.

Neal smiled broadly at the sight of Hope and Olivia sitting in the backyard sandbox, making a huge mess with sand and pails of water, a very poor facsimile of a sand castle nestled between them. They couldn't have been more than two years old and were sitting in just their undies and sun hats, under the warm summer sun. Olivia was staring back at the camera, her face covered in mud as Hope worked diligently at mixing the messy concoction with a plastic shovel, her tongue sticking out of the side of her mouth.

‘Oh, and look at Liam!’ she said. 

There sat Sara in her hospital bed, beaming as she held up a newborn Liam for the world to see while Neal stood behind her, leaning in with his arm around her shoulder. Hope sat on the edge of the bed next to her mom, placing a kiss on her new baby brother’s forehead. 

The happy little family. 

Neal could remember exactly how he’d felt that day: that sense of excitement and that feeling of pride for the new baby they’d waited to welcome into their lives for so long.

Hope turned the page and Neal laughed as he spotted a shot of both kids in the bathtub, Liam tucked in between Hope’s legs as she held him up with one hand and blew bubbles with the other. Liam couldn't have been much more than three months old, she the big sister, always looking out for him. His little boy parts floated on top of the water as he giggled without a care in the world.

‘Liam would be mortified if you showed that to anyone’ he commented, thinking of his son, the now six-foot-two basketball star/sex symbol of Syracuse University.

‘Yeah, let’s save this one for when he gets married’ Hope said with a giggle. 

‘Awww, look. Here we are asleep together in his crib’ she said.

‘I remember that day’ Neal said with a nod. ‘He was just a couple of weeks old. Your mom and I went up to check on him and we found you curled up beside him in his crib. I think we stood there staring for about ten minutes…. just staring at the two of you.’

He could feel the emotions rising in his chest. His little girl was all grown up and she was getting married, leaving the safety of the nest once and for all. As exciting as it was to see her moving on to the next big chapter of her life, it also meant leaving the life they knew behind. 

The changes in their lives had been so gradual, he hadn't really noticed them. Life had remained basically the same for the past twenty-five years: all four of them living in the same house, sharing their everyday lives. Except for a couple of short-term comings and goings — business trips for both him and Sara, university for Hope then for Liam, Hope spending nights over at Cam’s — they’d always lived under the same roof. This change was permanent… all too permanent.

He returned his attention to the photo album, trying his best to shake off the nostalgia.

‘Oh, I remember this one. We were still living at Grandma June’s and I had brought you into bed with us one morning. Mom had just woken up…’ 

He let his voice trail, thick with emotion and turned the page, eager to keep from getting too maudlin.

‘There you are on your first day of school’ he said, gazing down at a photograph of Hope and Olivia, holding hands by the big yellow school bus. Hope had a big smile on her face, not the least bit embarrassed by the huge gap between her teeth. She looked so proud in a leopard print skirt and off-white sweater, her big heavy backpack dwarfing her small frame. 

As he turned the pages of the album, he could see the years passing, the kids changing before his very eyes, each picture a distinct and happy memory of days gone by. Every single photograph brought him back to that moment and all the emotions that went with it: excitement, wonder, pride, joy, a veritable roller coaster of emotions. 

There were dozens of shots of them at the cottage they’d rented every summer for more than ten years — sitting on the dock, fishing, splashing around in the lake, sitting around the campfire making s’mores…. just being a family. A lifetime of memories… and now, everything was changing. He glanced at Hope, noticing her self-composure, that look of self-confidence he recognized all too well.

‘You okay Dad?’ she asked, noticing the faraway look in his eyes.

Neal swallowed hard and kept looking at the photo album, not trusting himself to speak out loud. His silence didn't fool Hope; she knew all too well how sentimental her father was. 

‘Aww Daddy, don’t be sad’ she said, slipping her arm in his letting her head drop on his shoulder. ‘We’ll probably be over here all the time.’

Neal nodded but said nothing, patting her hand with his. 

He knew she’d always be around but it would never quite be the same again. His baby girl, his sweet pea, was all grown up and although she might be ready to embark on this new adventure, he wasn't quite so sure he was ready to let her go. 

WCWCWC

‘So what is it exactly you have to do?’ Josh asked as he watched Liam packing an overnight bag.

‘Nothing much… just give him the ring when the time comes and say a few words at the dinner.’

‘How come he asked you?’

Liam shrugged. ‘We’re pretty tight. Hope says he asked his brother first but he didn’t want to do it, he hates having to speak in public.’

‘So, you’re his second choice?’ Josh said, teasing his roommate.

‘Shut up!’ Liam replied, throwing a pair of socks at his head.

Josh continued to laugh, enjoying the banter. ‘So, you have to make a speech, huh?’

‘Not a speech… well, kind of a speech, I guess. You know, just tease him a little, keep him on his toes. It’s a best man speech, you’ve got to ham it up a little.’

He caught the socks Josh tossed back at him and threw them into his bag, returning to his dresser for some underwear. 

‘Caitlin gave me a hand. We prepared a little presentation, you know pictures of him growing up, when he and Hope started dating… stuff like that.’

‘Your sister must be excited.’

Liam thought of that for a moment. ‘Yeah, I guess… Hope’s not really into all that girly stuff. She’s just happy to be marrying Cam. She’s been through so much, she deserves to be happy.’

‘I’m going to be best man when my brother marries his boyfriend this summer. I’m going to need all the help I can get.’

On the very first day they’d met, in response to Liam’s admission about his sexuality, Josh had confided that his brother was gay. That had helped the two men bond from the start and they’d been buddies ever since. Liam gave him a thumbs up.

An unbidden image of himself standing in front of a justice of the peace alongside Cody briefly flashed in Liam’s mind, a scary, albeit not unappealing thought. 

Liam zipped up his bag and stood before his roommate. ‘Well, I guess that’s it’ he declared.

Josh got to his feet and gave the other man a hug. ‘Good luck man. Take lots of pictures.’

Liam walked to the door, glancing around the room as if he was afraid he’d forgotten something. He opened the door and stepped out.

‘I’ll see you on Monday!’ he called out over his shoulder as he headed out.

WCWCWC

Emily was in the kitchen having a cup of coffee when Sara came down. As unnerving as it was to think that the wedding was just twenty-four hours away, there was little left to do in the way of preparation. Thanks to the excellent work of their wedding planner, everything was pretty well ready to go. All that was left was to pass the hours while they waited for the main event.

‘El called while you were upstairs’ Emily said to her sister.

Sara shook her head; Elizabeth wouldn’t be happy until she nailed down every last detail.

‘How did she sound?’

‘Surprisingly calm. She just wanted to know what time everybody was coming over tonight. I told her 7:00 would be fine.’

Sara’s mind wandered. ‘Hey, I’ve got an idea. Instead of the two of us going out for lunch why don't I call Bonnie Armstrong and we can pick her up at the hotel and all go over to El’s, bring her over some lunch. She’s been working non-stop for weeks. It’ll do her good to relax before the big day.’ 

‘Is she nice?’

Sara looked at her sister, puzzled. ‘Who? El?’

‘No silly. Cam’s mom, what’s she like?’

‘Really nice. Very… proper, I guess.’

‘Proper?’

‘Not proper, just maybe a little old school. Very sweet, tiny little thing, about five-foot-two.’

‘How did a woman that tiny give birth to a six-foot-four man?’ Emily said with a chuckle.

‘One of the mysteries of life, I guess’ Sara said, thinking of her own son, no slouch himself. 

‘What time does Liam get in?’

‘Neal’s picking him up at the bus station at around one o’clock.’

Emily nodded. It was always nice to come to New York, to see her extended family, spend time with her niece and nephew. She glanced around to make sure no one was within earshot.

‘So you never told me what happened when you told Randall Piper you couldn’t keep working on his account?’ she whispered.

Sara sighed loudly. What a journey it had been; she still had so many regrets, not the least of which was how this little misadventure had affected her relationship with Neal.

‘He was fine. He’s been very apologetic since it happened. When I told him I was recusing myself, he didn't balk at all.’

She glanced towards the front of the house to see if Neal was around. The whole subject was still a sore spot and she couldn't blame him. Not really.

‘I didn't want Sterling Bosch to lose the account but there’s a line I refuse to cross. I really hurt Neal and I need to make it right… for him, for our marriage. I owe him that much.’

Emily hugged her sister.

‘What’s that for?’ Sara asked.

‘Because I love you and I’m so glad you’re happy.’

Sara squeezed her sister tight. ‘Neal makes me happy… he’s everything I could ever hope for and to think I gambled recklessly with our life together. It’s scary to think it could all go away in the blink of an eye if we don’t keep reminding ourselves how lucky we are to have each other.’

Neal sat on the staircase, out of sight, listening in on the conversation, his heart beating just a little faster. He couldn't agree more. 

WCWCWC

The duelling bachelor parties were informal and wrapped up early as per the wishes of the bride and groom. Both Hope and Cam were focussed on their special day and the get-togethers had been meant as an opportunity for the two families to meet and get to know each other before the big day. Except for Bonnie and Becky, none of the Armstrongs had ever visited the Caffreys in New York. Cam’s sisters had been over the moon about being in the big city and earlier in the day, Hope and Cam had taken them to visit the Empire State Building followed by a visit to the gallery. 

Over at Cam’s apartment, Neal chatted with Fred Armstrong, a man he had very little in common with. And yet, after tomorrow, they would be family, bound together by their children’s love and commitment to each other and perhaps someday, they would both be grandfathers to the same beautiful babies. 

Over at the Caffrey house, Sara welcomed Bonnie and the girls along with some of Hope’s friends. It was quiet as far as bachelorette parties went, no strippers or crazy games just a chance to get to know everyone before they all showed up at the church the next day.

The festivities were over by 11:00 and while her mom and aunt Emily were busy tidying up, Hope snuck out of the house and made her way over to Cam’s apartment in Flushing for a surprise visit. 

‘What are you doing here?’ he whispered as he opened the door a crack.

Hope peeked in, spotting little Joe asleep on the couch in the living room. The twelve-year-old had fallen asleep as the party was winding down and Cam had suggested he spend the night while the rest of the Armstrong men returned to their hotel. 

‘I just wanted to… see you one last time before tomorrow’ she whispered with a playful eyebrow wag.

Cam returned the mischievous look. He grabbed her arm and pulled her into the apartment, placing his finger on his lips and urging her to be quiet. He led her into the bedroom and closed the door behind them.

‘I thought we agreed not to see each other tonight’ he said as he pressed her up against the door and kissed her hello.

She shrugged and smiled naughtily. ‘I know but…’

She slipped her arms around his neck and pulled him into her for a more substantive smooch. Cam half-heartedly fought her off, his mind wandering to the impressionable twelve-year-old sacked out on his couch. Hope could see the uncertainty in his eyes.

‘We can be quiet’ she murmured seductively.

She pushed him towards the bed and he stumbled onto his back, pulling her along with him. Cam’s ears were tuned to any unexpected sounds coming from the living room as he did his best to concentrate on the gorgeous woman in his arms, the woman who was about to become his wife. 

They kissed some more, Cam not totally on board and yet, he began to give in, letting himself be seduced by his wife-to-be’s tried and true moves. The make-out session went on for a while, both Cam and Hope doing their best to carry on without making a sound. After a while, despite considerable effort on his part, it became apparent that there was something keeping Cameron from rising to the occasion. He let out a frustrated sigh and fell onto his back, staring up at the ceiling. 

‘This has never happened to me before’ he said, sounding worried.

‘It’s okay sweetie. It’s just nerves. It doesn't help to have your brother ten feet away.’ 

Cam shrugged, unconvinced. Not being able to get it up was something that happened to old men or to guilt-ridden guys who were cheating on their pregnant wives but not to a young, healthy man like him who was in the arms of the woman he loved. Not to Cameron Armstrong, Lothario extraordinaire.

‘Oh my God’ he said under his breath. ‘What if there’s something wrong with me?’

Hope giggled. ‘There’s nothing wrong with you’ she said, doing her best to reassure him.

‘Maybe I should get checked’ he added, his face tight. ‘You don’t want to marry someone who’s… defective.’

Hope poked him in the ribs. ‘Sweetie, there is not a single thing wrong with you’ she repeated, curling up in his arms.

‘Tomorrow night’s our wedding night and there won’t be a prepubescent boy sleeping right outside our bedroom door’ she whispered in his ear.

She licked the outside of his ear and Cam let out a sigh of relief.

‘I think… I think I’m okay know’ he murmured, feeling himself start to stir.

Hope laughed and climbed onto his lap, grabbing for her top and slipping it back on in one swift motion. 

‘You are more than okay, mister. And I want a rain check. Tomorrow night. Got it?’

He smiled at her and brought her down, kissing her hard. 

‘Promise’ he said as she pushed off him and got to her feet in order to finish getting dressed.

She watched his hand slip under the covers and down his body, his face anxious, as he went exploring. His smile lit up and he pulled his hand out from under the blankets and reached out for her. 

‘I think I’m okay now’ he said, hoping to entice her into staying a bit longer. His nerves seemed to have subsided enough for his natural instincts to kick in. Hope pushed him away and giggled.

‘Hold that thought’ she whispered as she leaned in to kiss him. ‘I won’t settle for anything but a hot, sexy stud on my wedding night.’

He watched as she tiptoed away, into the night. He turned over in bed, a smile on his face.

WCWCWC

‘Mom? Dad?’ came Hope’s quiet voice in the dead of night.

Neal had just nodded off but Sara was still wide awake, staring at the clock.

‘What is it honey?’

‘I can’t sleep’ she replied, tiptoeing into their bedroom.

Sara pulled back the blankets, inviting her daughter to slip in beside her. She slithered towards the centre of the bed careful not to wake Neal and she spooned her daughter , her arms settling around her. 

‘Remember when I used to get scared?’ Hope said, her voice quiet.

Sara laughed softly. ‘I still remember the first time you saw The Wizard of Oz. I think you slept in our bed for three weeks after that.’

‘Ugh, don’t remind me. I’m still scared of that stupid witch’ Hope giggled.

‘Shhh’ Sara murmured with a chuckle. ‘You’re going to wake your dad. It took him forever to settle down and fall asleep.’

‘He was getting a little teary-eyed this morning when we were looking at pictures together.’

That was no surprise to Sara Ellis. Her husband had always been the sensitive one in their coupling, the one who wore his heart on his sleeve.

‘For all his bravado and sense of adventure, I think your dad likes things to stay the same. Ever since we bought this new bed, he’s been complaining about it, saying the old one was just fine. He just doesn't do well with change, especially when it comes to you kids.’

‘Mom, I need to tell you something’ Hope whispered.

She pulled her mom’s arms around her a little tighter. 

‘What is it honey?’

‘It’s kinda scary to think I won’t be living here anymore.’

‘Oh honey, this will always be your home. You can come in and out as you please, open the fridge without asking, leave a mess in the kitchen like you always do.’

Hope chuckled, thankful for her mom’s attempt at keeping things light. But despite her excitement at the thought of spending the rest of her life with the man she loved, she couldn't help feeling unsettled. 

‘I know but… Mom, my home is with Cam now and I want that more than anything but it’s still a little scary. You and Dad have always been my safety net.’

Sara kissed her daughter’s shoulder, felt her tremble. ‘Sweetie, we’ll always be here for you. Always.’

She could feel herself growing emotional; so much for being the one doing the reassuring. ‘Things might be a little different but that’ll never change.’ 

They heard sniffling from the other side of the bed. Suddenly, Neal turned over and they could hear him breathing unevenly as he fought back sobs. It became obvious to both of them that he’d been listening to everything that was said. He put his arm around Sara and reached over, laying his hand on Hope’s back.

‘You heard your mom, sweet pea’ he said his voice quivering. ‘We’ll always be here for you.’

There was silence for a moment, the three of them holding each other in the night. Footsteps were heard in the hallway outside the room and Neal looked up to find a large looming silhouette in the doorway to their bedroom.

‘What the hell’s all the whispering about?’ came Liam’s voice.

Hope laughed and sat up, her arms open. ‘Get over here, you goof!’

TBC


	74. Chapter 74

May twenty-second turned out to be the perfect day for a late spring wedding - thanks to Bonnie Armstrong and her steadfast belief in old wive’s tales and the sacred power of the wooden rosary beads she’d inherited from her father.

Sara had never heard of the superstition until Bonnie asked if any of the Caffreys’ neighbours had a clothesline in their backyard - a question that had left Mrs. Caffrey scratching her head. Prospect Park was a typical middle-class neighbourhood and clotheslines in the backyards had never really been a ‘thing’ - as a matter of fact, they were shunned by the more hoity-toity residents and outright banned by the local community association which prided itself on having a nice, uncluttered neighbourhood. 

In the end, Bonnie had to settle for hanging her rosary beads on the laundry room rack Sara used to dry her unmentionables. That, according to Cam’s mom, was the only way to make sure it did not rain on your wedding day.

Whether Bonnie’s rosary beads were responsible for the glorious weather was still up for debate but the sun was shining brightly on that Saturday morning as everyone prepared to scatter to their assigned locations: men over to the Burkes in Brooklyn and women in White Plains at the Caffrey home. 

Liam’s job as best man was to chauffeur the groom around, make sure he didn't get into any trouble and, most importantly, that he made it to the church on time. He was taking the job very seriously and by 9:00, he was showered and dressed and ready to go over to Cam’s place in Flushing to collect him and take him over to the Burkes.

He came downstairs, carrying a pair of freshly polished shoes and a garment bag, whistling a tune that sounded vaguely like ‘Going to the Chapel’. He found Caitlin and Hope sitting at the kitchen table, sipping a cup of coffee as if it was any old Saturday morning in the Caffrey household. 

Which, of course, it was not.

‘Good morning ladies’ he called out. 

He walked over to where his sister sat and leaned down to kiss her cheek, feeling a slight shiver travel through her body. ‘You’re looking pretty relaxed for a woman who’s about to lose her freedom and her independence’ he teased. 

Hope stuck her tongue out at him — her go-to response to his ribbing. Caitlin giggled and sprung to her feet, walking over to place her empty mug in the sink. 

‘Well, I’m going to go take a shower before things get crazy around here’ she announced.

‘Whatever you do, don’t get lost on the way to the church’ she called to Liam over her shoulder as she headed upstairs. 

Liam helped himself to a cup of coffee and took a seat next to his sister, reaching over to take her hand. ‘So… this is it, huh sis? You’re really getting married.’

She gave him an eyebrow wag and tried unsuccessfully to stifle a nervous giggle. ‘I know… I can’t believe we’re finally doing this. It’s been such a long road.’

He squeezed her hand, watching as tears began to form unexpectedly in her eyes.

It had indeed been a long road since that day, four years earlier, when Cameron Armstrong had slipped a ring on her finger only to have fate intervene so cruelly mere hours later, threatening to tear them apart for good. 

‘When I was in the hospital…’ she began, her voice uneven. ‘Cam was with me every step of the way. I don’t know what I would have done without him. I’m not sure I would have found the strength and the courage to fight on my own. He… he stood by me when I didn't know if I was ever going to walk again or talk again or if they’d be able to put my face back together again.’

Liam nodded as she spoke, recalling that horrible period in their lives.

‘While I was unconscious… I could feel him there beside me, holding my hand, talking to me, telling me how much he loved me, how we’d be together again. And then, when I came to and I saw the mess I was… He kept telling me how beautiful I was, how much he loved me, how he’d always be there for me.’

‘He’s a keeper, that’s for sure’ Liam said, his voice soft and quiet.

Hope wiped the tear which had escaped onto her cheek. ‘Some couples live their whole lives without having to go through something like that. He could have walked away, built a new life with someone else.’

Liam scoffed; he knew Cameron Armstrong all too well. ‘As if…’

‘I know… but he was only… what, twenty-three years old and here he was newly engaged to a woman who was facing months and years of recovery, if I recovered. My face had been destroyed, I didn't know if I’d be able to talk again or to go back to living the life I was living before. I wouldn't have blamed him for walking away… but I never saw a single doubt in his eyes. He kept telling me how wonderful our life was going to be, how I needed to fight so we could make our dreams come true.’

Liam’s mind wandered back to that horrible period in their lives, a time where his big sister, the person he looked up to and counted on the most had lay motionless on a hospital bed for months, her future uncertain.

‘We were all so scared’ he admitted. ‘I was just a kid and I was so afraid I’d lost you for good, that you would never be the same again. But Cam… he never wavered, it was like he knew without a doubt you were going to pull through.’

She nodded and threw her arms around her brother’s neck, hugging him tightly. ‘I love him so much Liam. He makes me happy’ she whispered breathlessly. 

He pulled away, looking into her eyes. ‘I’m glad sis. Because if you’re happy, I’m happy.’

WCWCWC

The first to arrive on Meadowbrook Street were the Armstrong women: Bonnie, Becky, Rhonda and Lucy. The two younger girls looked like they’d taken a triple dose of Ritalin and Hope knew they would be scraping them off the ceiling before the day was done. Being in the big city for their brother’s wedding was a double whammy, worthy of giddiness and unrestrained excitement. Bonnie Armstrong settled the two of them in the family room alongside Raffie and some of Liam’s old video games, hoping to keep them calm while the beehive of activity buzzed around them.

Emily had arrived on an early morning flight and was upstairs with Sara and Elizabeth while Hope chatted with her future mother-in-law in the kitchen.

‘I was just talking to Cam’ Bonnie confided. ‘I don’t remember ever seeing him this excited. He said he wasn't able to eat a bite of breakfast.’

Hope gave her a glorious smile - worthy of a bride about to marry the love of her life.

Bonnie continued. ‘You know Cam’s always been really low maintenance. I think he was the easiest of all our kids. He never gave us a single day of worry - always so responsible and trustworthy.’

Her mind wandered and settled on a distant memory. ‘Except that one time, his friends talked him into throwing a party while we all were away visiting my sister in Milwaukee. He’d talked us into leaving him on his own… I guess he would have been about sixteen. I had warned him not to have any friends over while we were gone but… anyway, when we got back, the house was perfectly clean and orderly but I could tell something was bothering him. He sat us down and confessed that he’d gone against direct orders and had had a bunch of friends over. Things had gotten a little out of hand and one of his friends had had a little mishap with an Armstrong family heirloom, a vase from one of Fred’s old aunts. He set the vase down on the table in front of us; to be honest, I never would have noticed the chip in the porcelain if he hadn't spoken up. He’d already gotten a written estimate of how much it would cost to have it repaired and he pulled out a typewritten sheet of paper with his plan for paying us back over the next three months.’

Hope chuckled. That sounded a lot like Cam: serious, honest, principled, trustworthy. 

Bonnie studied Hope’s animated face. ‘It’s obvious how crazy he is about you’ she said. ‘I can see how happy you make him.’

‘Thanks Mrs. Armstrong…’ Hope said. ‘He makes me very happy too.’

Bonnie frowned. ‘I’ve been meaning to ask you… do you think you could call me something else? I mean besides Mrs. Armstrong.’

Hope shrugged. ‘I guess…’

‘When I married Fred, I would avoid addressing his mother by name because I wasn't sure what to call her’ Bonnie said with a chuckle. ‘God bless her soul, I did that for almost thirty years. She was not an easy woman to get to know and to be honest, I’m not sure I ever saw her smile in all the years I knew her.’

‘I don’t want that for us, Hope’ she continued. ‘What would work best for you? Calling me Bonnie or… if you want, you could call me ‘Mom’.’

Hope’s eyes widened in response. She hadn't given it much thought but it sounded disrespectful to her own mom to be calling another woman by a name that was reserved for the one woman who’d been there for her since the moment she’d been placed in her arms. 

It was easy for Cam: he’d been around their family for years and he’d always called her folks Mr. and Mrs. Caffrey - just a habit really, considering Neal had not only been his girlfriend’s dad but his boss too. But they’d never really discussed what she should call his parents.

‘I’m sorry, have I made you uncomfortable?’ Bonnie asked seeing the hesitation in Hope’s eyes.

‘No, no. I’ve been wondering the same thing myself’ she admitted. ‘I know the kids call you ‘ma’ and ‘pa’. W-w-would that work for you?’

Bonnie smiled; it sounded like the perfect solution. ‘I would love that!’ she exclaimed. 

‘Okay…. Ma’ Hope said hesitantly as Neal appeared with a garment bag, just as Liam had done an hour earlier.

‘Hey girls!’ he called out in the direction of the family room couch. 

‘Good morning Bonnie’ he added. ‘Big day today, huh?’

The two women grew quiet and Neal realized he’d walked in on a private moment between the two of them. ‘Am I interrupting something?’ he asked.

‘No, no, not at all’ Bonnie said, wiping her eyes. ‘I was just about to go check on the bridesmaids, see what they’re up to.’

‘They’re up in Caitlin’s room. I’m not quite sure what they’re doing…’ Neal said with a shrug ‘… but there’s an awful lot of giggling going on.’

Hope stood and Bonnie opened her arms to her. They hugged as Neal watched, his heart tight as he realized that after today, his daughter’s life (and by extension the whole Caffrey family) would be linked forever to the Armstrong clan. 

‘Thank you Mrs. Ar… Ma’ Hope said as the other woman smiled, happy with the compromise.

Neal grinned at his daughter and mouthed the word ‘ma’ as he winked. Hope was just about to follow her mother-in-law upstairs when Neal reached for her arm. 

‘You got a minute sweet pea?’ he asked, glancing over his shoulder at the teens who were totally engrossed in their video game.

‘Yeah, sure Dad’ Hope said, sitting down once again. ‘What’s up?’

Her hair was haphazardly piled up on the top of her head in a messy pony tail and she wore a pair of pyjamas she’d been wearing since high school, looking like the little girl she still was in her father’s eyes. In short, she looked like she’d looked every single morning of her life as she lounged around the kitchen, just hanging out. Neal blinked, flashing back to two-year-old Hope, her eyes bright and curious, her ready smile and easygoing nature. She was just a kid, how could she possibly be getting married? 

He sighed, feeling emotions bubbling to the surface. ‘It’s just that… I’m not going to see you until I get to the church’ he began. ‘And… I wanted to tell you —’  
He stopped suddenly and Hope leaned forward expectantly, waiting for him to continue. He seemed to have momentarily lost the ability to speak.

‘That you love me and that you’re happy for me’ she said, filling in the blanks.

He nodded and chuckled. ‘Something like that’ he said.

Her eyes shone brightly and her cheeks grew flushed as she struggled to contain the excitement she was feeling at finally joining her destiny with the man she loved. 

Her voice quivered as she spoke. ‘Dad, he makes me happy. I love him so much and I know we’re going to have a wonderful life together.’

Neal struggled to keep the avalanche of mixed emotions from showing on his face. Despite his smile, Hope sensed sadness and trepidation emanating from him; apprehension that things might never quite be the same again between the two of them.

‘But, Daddy…’ she said, reaching for his hand ‘…you will always be my number one, the first man I ever loved, you know that, right? You’re my hero… you were there for me long before Cam ever showed up and… I love you so much. You and Mom… you’ve always been there for me and I owe you everything I have and everything I am.’

Neal could feel the tears coming now; no matter how hard he tried, there was no way he could escape the myriad of emotions rising in his chest. It was hitting him like a ton of bricks: he would never again come downstairs to find her sitting at the kitchen table in those god-awful flannel pyjamas with her wild mane of hair disheveled and out of control. He’d never again wander down to the studio to find her behind her easel with that look of pure concentration on her face, an expression that mirrored his own. He would never again hear her voice call out to him when he got home from work or wake to find her slipping into bed next to him and Sara as she’d done the night before. From now on, if she needed help, her first call would be to her husband, not to him. And as happy as he was for her, it hurt. It hurt like nothing he’d ever felt before.

Despite the fact he was quickly turning into a blubbering idiot, he spoke, ignoring the tremor in his voice.

‘Honey, I am so proud of the woman you’ve become. When you were born, I was a hot mess. I was terrified I was going to screw everything up. I kept pinching myself, wondering how life had given me such a perfect kid.’ 

‘But somehow, no matter how many times I said the wrong thing or did the wrong thing, we’d find a way to work it out and yesterday, when we were looking at those pictures… it was like I was reliving every single, wonderful moment I’ve ever had with you. And wishing we could do it all over again.’

Hope gazed at him, the man who’d been there for her since day one. He’d been that one constant in her life regardless of whatever else was happening around her. He’d been a loving and supportive dad, keeping her safe from life’s inherent dangers yet encouraging her to take chances and to learn from whatever new experiences life threw at her. 

Neal was wiping his eyes now, the tears flowing freely. ‘I was remembering the night Cam carried you in here on his shoulder. You were drunk and I was so mad at you. I wish I’d been more understanding that night… I wish I’d given you more space to make your own mistakes, to live your life.’

Hope chuckled at the memory and gave him a playful slap on the arm.

‘Daddy, stop it. Why are you bringing that up now? You’ve always been there for me when I needed you and you knew when to give me a dose of tough love - which I definitely needed that night by the way’ she said with a chuckle. 

‘You showed me that if you screw up, you own it, you make amends and pick yourself up and do better the next time. But more importantly, you lived your life that way too. If Cam and I can be half the parents you and Mom were for me and Liam… well, our kids will be the luckiest kids in the world.’ 

Neal cleared his throat and stood, opening his arms to his little girl. Hope stepped into his embrace, resting her head on his chest as he held her tenderly.

‘Be happy’ he murmured into her hair as he stifled a sob.

He pulled away, gazing at her from head to toe, taking it all in so he could remember this moment for the rest of his life. The next time he laid eyes on her, she’d be standing before him in her wedding dress, no longer a little girl but a grown woman about to embark on the most amazing adventure of her life. 

‘Daddy, will you do one thing for me?’ she asked, her voice shaky.

‘Anything.’

‘Promise me that you’ll never stop calling me sweet pea.’

His gaze softened as he let out a quiet sob. Maybe he was wrong, maybe there would always be a glimmer of his little girl hiding somewhere deep inside her.

He nodded. ‘See you at the church… sweet pea’ he said with a wink.

And with that, Neal picked up his garment bag and headed out the front door.

WCWCWC

Peter and Elizabeth had generously offered up their home as a gathering place for the men in the wedding party. Fred Armstrong had shown up at around ten thirty with little Joe and Owen in tow followed by Cody who’d come over to help his boyfriend - who was wholly inept when it came to putting on clothes with actual buttons and zippers, let alone tying a perfect Windsor knot. 

Liam made a detour to Flushing to pick up the groom who was looking a little green around the gills. He tried his best to talk him down during the short drive over but Cam insisted on practicing his vows over and over again, terrified that, when the time came, he would draw a complete blank. 

‘How was Hope when you left the house?’ he asked as they neared the Burkes’ place. 

‘She seemed fine when I left… she’s excited.’ 

Cam let out a strangled sound. ‘Liam, I think I’m going to throw up’ he said out of the blue.

Liam gave him a wary look and stepped on the gas intent on avoiding a mess in the car they’d be using to get the groom to the church.

‘Hang on’ he said taking the corner a little faster than he should have.

‘Not helping!’ Cam muttered as Liam finally pulled up in front of the house and parked the car. 

Cameron stepped out and took a few tentative deep breaths as he strolled up and down the sidewalk in front of the Burkes’ house, trying to calm down. Liam brought his hand to his shoulder and gave a reassuring squeeze. 

‘It’s going to be fine Cam, just breathe, all right?’

Just as they were about to start up the steps to the house, Neal drove up, beeping his car horn repeatedly and waving frantically. 

The father of the bride had arrived.

Peter stood by the front door, a big smile on his face and waved back. 

WCWCWC

Cody stood behind Liam as they both faced the mirror in the Burkes’ guest room. He had his arms wrapped around Liam’s shoulders as he attempted to tie a perfect Windsor knot from behind. Being a couple of inches shorter than his boyfriend was making the task a little tricky — and Liam’s constant fidgeting wasn't helping one bit.

‘Turn around so I can do this properly’ Cody finally said, growing impatient. 

‘That’s better’ he sighed as he continued to fiddle with Liam’s tie.

Liam slipped his finger between his neck and his shirt collar and began to tug, uncomfortable with the tight fit.

‘Would you please stop? You’re messing up my perfect knot.’

‘It’s too tight’ Liam grumbled.

‘It’s exactly the perfect size for your perfect neck’ Cody replied as he placed a kiss on his boyfriend’s cheek. ‘See, this is what happens when you live your life in a lycra tank top.’

‘It’s a team uniform. And it’s polyester’ Liam corrected as Cody rolled his eyes.

Liam continued fidgeting and leaned in, kissing the other man’s mouth in an effort to distract him. Cody let his arms drop dramatically to his side in a sign of defeat.

‘You know, what?’ he said, annoyed. ‘If you’re going to be like that, do it yourself.’

‘No, no, no’ Liam replied reaching out for him. ‘Don’t, please. I promise, I’ll stop fidgeting.’

Cody sighed and had barely resumed the task when Liam grinned naughtily and kissed him again, hoping his irresistible charm would keep the other man from losing it. There was a faint knock on the bedroom door and Neal popped his head in, finding the two men in a warm embrace.

‘Sorry to interrupt boys’ he said with a shrug. ‘I’ve got your boutonnières.’

‘Our button what?’

Cody rolled his eyes. ‘Seriously?’ he grumbled. ‘You really need to get out more babe.’

‘Is our best man being difficult?’ Neal asked with an amused grin.

Cody stepped away. ‘You know what? He’s all yours’ he cried out over his shoulder as he prepared to leave the room. ‘Good luck!’

Liam chuckled; Cody’s bark was worse than his bite.

‘I think he’s more nervous about me being best man than I am’ he declared as his dad stepped into the room.

‘Wow! Look at you. I’m not used to seeing you all dressed up. You clean up really nice.’

‘Well, don’t get used to it’ Liam barked back, going back to tugging insistently at his shirt collar.

‘Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold it!’ Neal said, stepping forward. ‘Come here, I’ll show you a little trick.’

He proceeded to unbutton the top button of Liam’s shirt and tightened the tie just enough to keep it from showing.

‘Better?’ he asked as Liam nodded. 

‘Just don’t fiddle with your tie and you’ll be fine. Nobody will be the wiser’ Neal advised, admiring how handsome his son looked.

He grew silent and Liam couldn't help but notice that funny look in his eyes; the one he got whenever he got emotional about one of his kids.

‘What is it? What’s wrong Dad?’ Liam asked.

‘Nothing…’ Neal began. ‘I was just thinking maybe someday we’ll be getting ready for your wedding.’

Liam sighed and gave a nervous chuckle. ‘You think so?’

‘Why not? If that’s what you want, anything is possible.’

Liam’s mind wandered and for the second time in as many days, he imagined himself standing next to Cody, preparing to take the plunge. The random thought didn't feel quite so strange this time around. 

‘One thing’s for sure, you’re going to be a terrific best man’ Neal said, clasping his son’s shoulder. 

‘Speaking of which, how’s the groom doing?’ Liam asked.

‘He’s with his dad, getting ready. Peter gave him something to settle his stomach. I better go deliver these’ Neal said, holding up a few more lilac boutonnières.

Liam’s hand moved to his neck and Neal glared at him. ‘Don’t touch! If you fiddle with it, it’ll show.’

Liam nodded and stood in front of his dad, straight as an arrow. ‘Good?’

‘Perfect’ Neal replied.

WCWCWC

‘Can I get you anything else?’ Fred Armstrong asked his eldest son.

Cameron’s hand shook as he took a sip of water. ‘No…I’ll be fine as soon as I see Hope.’

The man nodded; his first-born was getting married and this father of the groom stuff was all new to him. ‘Are you sure it’s not because… you’ve changed your mind?’

‘No Dad! No! It’s just nerves. I’ve waited so long for Hope to be my wife. It’s just… a little overwhelming, that’s all.’

‘It’s a big step in a man’s life’ Fred said, reaching into his pocket. ‘I brought you something that I wore on my wedding day. For good luck. It’s from your mom and me.’

Cameron’s eyes were drawn to his father’s hand as he pulled out a silk handkerchief from his pants pocket. 

‘My mom embroidered it and gave it to me on my wedding day’ the elder Armstrong said.

Cam could see the words ‘Bonnie and Fred’ embroidered with a heart surrounding the names of his parents. His dad flipped it over and Cam gasped as he saw his name and Hope’s embroidered similarly with fine silk thread.

‘Your mom thought she’d do the same for you and maybe someday, you and Hope can pass it along to your son on his wedding day.’

Cam’s hands shook as he took the handkerchief from his dad’s hand. Fred reached out and awkwardly hugged his son, something he wasn't in the habit of doing very often.  
‘I know I don’t show it much but I’m awfully proud of you son’ he said, his voice tight. ‘I think you’ve found yourself a wonderful life partner and I hope you and Hope will be very happy.’

‘Thanks Dad’ Cameron said, wiping his eyes.

Neal appeared the doorway just as the men were pulling apart. 

‘Sorry to interrupt’ he said, holding up the boutonnières in his hands. ‘It’s time for you two to put these on.’

Fred Armstrong coughed - a move Neal recognized for what it was - and reached for the boutonnières, preparing to carry out one more tradition.

WCWCWC

The sound of footsteps coming from the third floor echoed in the house and Sara stood to give herself one last appraising look in the mirror. She adjusted her corsage and took a deep breath, preparing to come face to face with her daughter.

‘Ready to see the bride?’ Elizabeth asked as she poked her head in the bedroom doorway.

Sara nodded and took a few tentative steps as Hope appeared, an absolute vision in her wedding dress. 

Sara gasped, her hand covering her mouth. ‘Oh my God!’

Elizabeth’s eyes went from one woman to the other, Hope’s dark hair and bright blue eyes in contrast with her mother’s slight frame and fair colouring. They both looked amazing. Sara kept staring at her daughter, eyes moving from head to toe. It had taken awhile to get just the right dress but Hope was sheer perfection in the long mermaid style dress she’d ended up choosing.

‘I can’t believe it. Honey, you look incredible’ Sara said, wiping her eyes.

‘Dammit!’ she said, spying a touch of mascara on her fingertips. ‘I thought you said this stuff was waterproof’ she said, glaring at Elizabeth. 

El was immediately by her side, dabbing at the corner of her best friend’s eye. ‘It’s fine Sara, relax. Just dab, don’t wipe.’

Sara’s eyes returned to her daughter, looking so different than she looked in everyday life. Whereas she usually wore her hair down in loose curls, she’d opted for an up do, showing off her high cheek bones and bright blue eyes. A small row of mauve lilacs was artfully arranged in her hair, a halo of sorts.

‘Wait until Cam gets a look at you’ Sara said, her voice quivering. 

‘You’re not looking too shabby yourself Mom. Dad’s going to love you in that dress.’

Sara twirled on herself, proud of her choice. 

‘I’ll go round up the troops’ Elizabeth said. ‘We have to leave for the church in about ten minutes.’

Sara walked over to take her daughter’s hand. ‘You okay sweetie?’

Hope nodded, smiling broadly. ‘More than okay Mom’ she replied. ‘I can’t wait to see Cam.’

There was a small box on the dresser and Sara picked it up, her long fingers lingering on the soft smooth velvet. ‘Honey, Daddy and I got you a little something to wear. I hope you like it.’

Hope reached out, a slight tremor in her hands as she opened the box, revealing a delicate gold bracelet with pearls throughout, a perfect complement to her wedding gown. 

‘I love it Mom’ she cried, hugging Sara gingerly.

‘Dad and I picked it out together. It reminded us of you: delicate yet strong.’

Sara turned it over, pointing to some engraving on the underside. ‘We had the date engraved and your name… well, not your name exactly’ she said as Hope focussed on the message. 

‘To our sweet pea on her wedding day’ it read.

Hope threw her arms around her mom, hugging her tightly. ‘It’s perfect Mom, just perfect!’

WCWCWC

Neal felt Peter clasp him firmly on the shoulder. ‘You okay buddy?’ 

‘Yeah, yeah’ Neal said with a weak smile.

Knowing his best friend as he did, it was easy to figure out what was on Neal’s mind. 

‘It’s going to be fine, Neal. She’ll still be around.’

Neal shrugged and Peter caught a glimpse of the young conman from all those years ago: a look of pure emotion on his face. 

‘I know’ Neal said softly.

‘She’s happy, isn't that what we all want for her?’

Neal nodded in silence and Peter caught the glimmer of a tear in his eye. He moved in closer, hugging the other man, feeling the tension leaving his body.

‘Life’s a bitch, huh buddy?’ he said as Neal chuckled and wiped his eyes.

‘I wasn't expecting it to hit me quite this hard’ he said with a shrug.

Peter rolled his eyes. ‘You’re kidding right?’ he said deadpan. ‘Look at it this way, in a couple of months you’ll be telling her to stop dropping by so often and go home to her husband.’

The quip sparked an honest to goodness chuckle from Neal. He put his arm around Peter’s shoulder and pointed him towards the door.

‘Come on Chuckles, we’ve got a wedding to go to.’

TBC


	75. Chapter 75

The sight of the two Caffrey vehicles parked up the street from St. Anthony's Church was enough to get Hope Ellis Caffrey's little heart pumping in double time; it meant that her betrothed had arrived and was just a few feet away, waiting for her inside. She'd driven over from White Plains with her mom, her aunt Elizabeth, her aunt Emily and Olivia Mason while Bonnie had followed in their rental car along with the two other bridesmaids and the younger Armstrong girls.

A veritable wedding cortege.

'Over there' Hope said, pointing to the side street. Father Bertrand had given explicit instructions for the wedding party to enter by the side door which led directly to two small rooms off the rectory - one for the bride and another for the groom.

El pulled over and Hope slipped out of the back seat of the car, her legs a little rubbery, her breath a little unsteady. She took a moment to admire her handiwork in the garden out front; the crocuses she and Cam had planted the previous weekend looked like they'd always been there alongside the flowering daffodils and the bright coloured tulips. She glanced up at the cloudless sky, feeling the sun on her face as she thought of her grandmother and that special moment they'd shared in her room that day. She felt a reassuring warmth envelop her, comforted by the knowledge that her grandmother was looking down on her on her special day.

The sun shone brightly, the birds chirped and the sweet scent of spring flowers hung in the air. Above their heads, the church bells rang joyfully, inviting all who had come to witness the union of Hope Elizabeth Ellis Caffrey and Cameron Raymond Armstrong to step inside and take their place.

For a moment, she stood still, taking it all in and committing it to memory. Sara waited patiently, seeing the look of pure bliss on her daughter's face. When their eyes finally met, she spoke.

'Come on honey' she urged, putting out her hand. 'We don't want to keep your groom waiting.'

WCWCWC

'You okay buddy?'

Cameron stared off into space, his eyes vacant. It took a moment for him to realize he'd been spoken to.

'Cam?' Liam repeated.

'Yeah?'

'You all right?'

'What's taking so long?' Cameron asked, glancing up at the clock next to the huge crucifix on the wall.

'People are still being seated' Liam said, clasping his shoulder. 'It's okay, try to relax.'

'Here, have a sip' he added, placing a glass of water in front of the groom's glazed over eyes.

Cameron pushed his hand away with a deep frown and returned to fussing with his bowtie just as the door opened and Fred and Bonnie Armstrong appeared.

'Ma! Is she here?'

Bonnie's eyes grew wide at the sight of the six-foot-four young man standing before her, her baby, her first born - looking so handsome in a tux of all things. She tried in vain to remember the last time she'd seen him wearing a suit - maybe at his grandfather's funeral? She ran to him and threw her arms around his neck.

'You look incredible' she said, reaching up to hug him - not an easy task considering the difference in height between them.

Cam leaned down awkwardly and forced a smile. 'Where's Hope?' he murmured in her ear.

'She's here' Bonnie said. 'And she looks amazing. Wait until you see her.'

Cam let out a sigh of relief although his shoulders remained tense. Bonnie took a step back to better admire him, letting it all sink in. She could see a look of apprehension in his eyes, the tension in the air palpable.

'Honey, did you manage to eat anything?'

'Can't Ma. I can't keep anything down.'

She nodded in understanding. 'Fred, go ask Father Bertrand how much longer before Cameron has to take his place at the altar.'

'I can do that for you' Liam said with a wave of his hand. 'You just sit tight for a minute and I'll be right back. Don't let him get away' he added with a wry smile as he looked over at Fred.

He slipped out of the small groom's room and spotted Olivia Mason out in the hallway, hovering by the door to the bride's quarters with Caitlin and Becky Armstrong pacing nearby. The three women were clutching bouquets of lilacs and baby's breath, looking terrific, each in her own way.

'How does she look?' he asked Caitlin.

'Why don't you see for yourself' she replied, nodding in the direction of the closed door. 'Your mom and dad are in there with her.'

Liam gave a discreet knock on the door and stepped in just as Hope turned away from the mirror and faced him. He let out an audible gasp at the sight of her looking like… well, like a blushing bride from one of those expensive bridal magazines. She smiled up at him, her exuberant grin further lighting up the room.

Liam flashed back to the two of them hanging around the house, Hope in torn jeans and a t-shirt, her feet clad in those old ugs of hers that were long past their prime, her unruly hair hanging in her eyes or tucked up in a baseball cap. Neither of the Caffrey kids had inherited their parents' fashion genes although Hope had stepped it up a little since she'd started working at the gallery, wearing skirts and tailored slacks but this… this woman standing before him looked amazing, her make-up flawless, her hair swept up without a single strand out of place and yet it was her luminous smile that kept him riveted.

'Holy shit!' he cried out. 'Is that really you sis?'

'That's what Dad said' Hope replied with her usual spunk.

'Honey, I'm pretty sure I said something like: 'you look incredibly beautiful' Neal countered with an amused grin.

'Same thing' Hope said with a shrug.

Neal and Sara stood on either side of their daughter, looking amazing in their own right. Liam's gaze moved to his mom, looking regal in a brocade dress and matching bolero jacket, her hair done up for the occasion.

'Mom, you look great' he said, kissing her cheek.

Hope took a few steps towards her brother, laying her hand on his arm.

'Have you seen Cam? Is he all right?' she asked, her eyes brightening as she said his name.

'He's fine, just a little… jittery.'

Neal exchanged knowing glances with his son; he'd driven over in the car with the groom, Fred and Liam. Jittery was an understatement; the groom was on the verge of totally losing it.

'Is it almost time?' Hope asked looking up at the clock on the wall. It read 3:58 exactly.

'I was just about to go check with the priest' Liam mumbled.

'Father Bertrand' Hope corrected.

'Right… Father Bertrand' Liam repeated. 'I'll send one of the bridesmaids in to give you the two minute warning.'

He leaned over and kissed his sister. 'Good luck' he said. 'I'll see you at the altar.'

She nodded, that radiant smile returning to her lips and she turned to face the mirror, checking her reflection one last time. There was another knock on the door and this time Peter and Elizabeth stood in the doorway, intent on wishing the bride well before she stepped into the church.

Neal looked over at Liam and pointed to the door. 'I'll come with you' he offered.

Peter gave his best friend a tap on the shoulder before stepping inside the room to get a better look at his goddaughter.

'I'll go check on the bridesmaids' Sara said, following her son and husband out the door.

Peter's eyes were shiny with excitement and, perhaps as Elizabeth suspected, a tear or two.

'Oh my God, pumpkin!' he exclaimed, his voice wavering. 'I can't believe it… you're really getting married. You look… incredible.'

She hugged him gingerly almost as if she was afraid the magic of the moment might evaporate if she hugged him too tight.

'Thanks Uncle Peter…' she said with that smile that just wouldn't go away.

Elizabeth stepped aside as Peter pulled a wrapped gift out of nowhere and placed it in his goddaughter's hands. 'We brought you a little something' he said, his voice wavering.

Hope's eyes shone as she took the package from him. Growing up, she'd spent countless Saturdays over at her godparents' place, hanging out with Satchmo, working in the kitchen with her aunt Elizabeth, helping her godfather with household repairs, letting them spoil her rotten despite her folks' repetitive admonitions to stop coddling her.

She opened the smartly wrapped package, revealing a silver photo album with two dozen or so photographs of her and her uncle Peter, engaged in various activities: at the bowling alley, at the library, sharing a sausage pie at her favourite pizza joint, fixing a defective water faucet in the Burke kitchen, sharing a cherry coke after a job well done. A lifetime of memories wrapped up in one tidy package.

'We thought…' Peter began with an embarrassed shrug. 'We thought you might want to take a piece of the past with you into your new life.'

Emotions rose in Hope's chest as she hugged him again, with less caution this time. She glanced at her aunt Elizabeth who was busy wiping her eyes.

'Thank you… both of you. I love you and I promise to visit as often as…' she said, pointing to the keepsake. 'Well, maybe not quite as often as I used to — and maybe I'll pass on those Saturday morning visits to the library' she said, injecting some humour in the otherwise emotionally charged moment.

Peter grinned and nodded, momentarily unable to speak. There was a knock and Liam popped his head in the door.

'Two minutes' he said with a thumbs up.

WCWCWC

St. Anthony's was what might be described as a mid-sized church in the Bay Ridge area of Brooklyn. It had been built in the mid 40s, following the end of the second world war, a time when churches were sprouting up everywhere in order to accommodate the booming suburbs. The inside of the church had been renovated in the late nineties and everything except the ornate vaulted ceiling of stained glass had been given a nip and a tuck. The outside, on the other hand, had never been tampered with: grey stone façade, a decorative steeple where the church bells were concealed, colourful stained glass windows all around and a dozen or so steps leading to the twelve foot tall massive oak door.

When Hope took her place at the back of the church, she had her mom on one arm and her father on the other. The aisle stretched out ahead of her, seemingly endless. On either side, sat the attendees, a lot more guests than she'd imagined when she was sending out all those invitations. She could feel everyone turning to look in her direction but she only had eyes for her groom standing way at the other end, his legs apart as if he were trying to anchor himself in place. His hands were crossed in front of his body and from her vantage point, Hope couldn't quite see the expression on his face although she could well imagine it. Next to him stood Liam and to Cam's right, Father Bertrand in his festive clerical clothing, all of them waiting for her to take her place next to her groom.

A large pipe organ sat on the altar behind them but she and Cam would not be making use of it today. They had chosen more contemporary music to complement their ceremony - music that spoke to them. Ironically, they'd discovered that both sets of parents had used 'Here, There and Everywhere' at their weddings twenty odd years earlier; it had seemed like an omen they couldn't ignore. Hope could hear whispers coming from behind her as Olivia, Caitlin and Becky arranged their bouquets and took their places. Little Chloe Jordan stood before her, holding a basket of flower petals, prepared to lead them all down the aisle towards the altar where finally, the ceremony would begin.

Elizabeth stood by, waiting for Hope to give her the signal to start the music and send them all on their way.

'Ready?' Hope murmured to her folks. She felt them both squeeze her hand and she nodded as the first few chords and the familiar voice of Paul McCartney were heard echoing throughout the church. All heads turned in her direction and although she could hear soft gasps and whispers, her eyes remained riveted on Cameron, who she could now see was smiling back at her.

Neal glanced over at Sara, noticing her eyes glistening. For a brief moment, he went back in time, imagining her as she stepped off the staircase at June's looking timeless and elegant in her gorgeous wedding gown. Years later, every single detail remained so clear, so vivid: the sound of the birds outside as he stood by the garden door waiting for her, the guests clad in their Sunday best, the sight of June holding three-month-old Hope in her arms as she cooed, the rumbling of his nervous stomach, the thumping of his beating heart, the steadying presence of Peter by his side.

His eyes returned to his daughter; his heart swelling with pride as he reflected once more on the passage of time.

When they finally arrived at the altar, both he and Sara gave their daughter a peck on the cheek and joined hands, making their way to their seats in the first row on the bride's side of the church.

Hope gave Cam one of her brilliant smiles and he stared back in amazement, his eyes narrowing as if studying every single detail, the lilacs in her hair, the fabric of her dress, the adoring look in her eyes, the radiant smile on her lips.

The last few bars of the Beatles' ballad were heard as he leaned in to kiss her cheek. 'I don't know what to say…' he began, his breath halting. 'You look amazing.'

The words had barely left his lips when Hope noticed his eyes start to flutter, almost as if he was about to nod off. She felt him wobble slightly and she brought her hand to rest on his arm in order to steady him.

'Cam?' she said, looking at his face with alarm. He'd grown incredibly pale and she could see sweat appearing on his forehead as his lips quivered.

Suddenly, to the absolute shock of everyone in attendance, Cam tightened his grip on Hope's arm in a last ditch effort to keep from faltering. Despite his valiant effort to stay upright, he felt his knees buckle and slowly, as if he were a snowman melting under the warm spring sun, he slithered to the ground and landed on the ceramic floor to the loud gasps of the attendees.

WCWCWC

When he came to, Cam was back in the room where he'd gotten ready. His whole family was there as well as the Caffreys and the members of the wedding party, all of them staring at him in disbelief. Reassuringly, Hope's face came into focus and he noticed he was lying on the ground with his head cradled on her lap as she held a wet cloth to his forehead and spoke gently to him.

'Cam? Sweetie?'

'H-H-Hope' he murmured as things started to become clearer.

'Where is he?' they heard a female voice call out from behind the group huddled around him.

'Oh good, she's here!' Hope cried out in relief as everyone backed off a little in order to give the groom some room to breathe.

The crowd parted like the Red Sea and a short, rather decisive looking older woman pushed her way forward until she was standing over Cameron, glaring at him with both hands on her hips.

Cam had never seen the woman before. She was short in stature, similar to his mom but a little rounder and she had a look of determination that said 'Get the hell out of my way or I'll make you!.'

'Some guys will do just about anything to take the spotlight away from the bride. Am I right?' the woman said as she kneeled down beside Hope to get a better look.

'Can somebody get me some water?' she called out to no one in particular.

'Dr. Cooper…' Hope mumbled. 'Thank God you're here.'

'It's okay sweetheart' the family doctor said reassuringly. 'It looks like a case of low blood sugar to me.'

'Have you eaten today young man?' she asked as she brought the glass of water to his lips and forced him to drink.

Cameron shook his head slowly.

'We couldn't get him to eat a thing' Liam called out from the back of the small room. 'He said his stomach was upset.'

'Can one of you please find me something I can feed this growing boy?' the doctor asked as she continued to coax the groom into having a few more sips of water.

Liam made a beeline for the emergency bag he always travelled with. As a diabetic, he always had provisions with him, something he'd learned years ago following an unfortunate incident that had landed him in hospital. He produced a granola bar, a packet of nuts and a couple of candy bars and handed them to Dr. Cooper.

'I don't think you want to get chocolate on that dress, young lady' she said to Hope. Neal and Liam immediately helped her to her feet, seating her on a nearby chair as Cam sat up, finally getting some colour back in his cheeks.

He took a few tentative bites and within moments, he was sitting up straighter and looking more alert. 'I'm sorry' he mumbled, searching for Hope's eyes. 'I've ruined our wedding.'

Regardless of any potential damage to her dress, Hope was back on the floor next to him, running her hand through his hair and searching his eyes for signs that he was returning to his old self.

'You haven't ruined anything' she said with a warm smile '… unless this is some ruse to bail on me.'

He smiled, looking much more like himself. 'Are you kidding? Let's do this' he said, trying to get to his feet.

'Hold on there young man' Dr. Cooper warned. 'Let's give you a couple of minutes to get your bearings. Those people out there aren't going anywhere without the two of you… you are planning on feeding us after this, aren't you?'

The whole group chuckled at her attempt at humour. 'Open bar?' she asked as Neal nodded.

'Well, they're definitely sticking around then.'

She was taking over now, keeping things from becoming overly dramatic - just like the seasoned physician she was.

'All right, nothing to see here people' she said to the group. 'Everybody out, back to where you were before this all happened. Give me a minute and I'll get the bride and groom back out there and we can get this show on the road.'

The small crowd dispersed but not before Bonnie Armstrong kissed her boy on the forehead and Neal did the same to Hope.

True to her word, within minutes, Dr. Cooper had escorted them back out into the church, walking down the aisle with Hope on one side and Cam on the other to the applause (and a few catcalls) from the congregation.

'Dearly beloved…' Father Bertrand said as Cameron took Hope's hand in his.

WCWCWC

Despite the unorthodox beginning to the ceremony, everyone settled in for a traditional Catholic wedding complete with prayers and readings as well as music chosen by the young couple. During communion, while everyone came up to the altar one by one, they had opted for Josh Groban, a perfect choice for the more solemn portion of the mass. Neal and Sara held hands in the front pew and tried to keep from sobbing although they weren't having much luck at keeping their emotions in check. One glance across the aisle confirmed that Bonnie and Fred Armstrong weren't faring much better.

The moment finally came for the couple to exchange wedding vows and Father Bertrand turned to look at the bride.

'Hope, would you like to go first?' he asked.

She nodded and turned to face Cam, taking both his hands in hers. The sparkle was back in his eyes now, to her great relief.

'Cameron…' she began, her voice strong. She'd been hoping to get through this part of the ceremony with minimum damage to her make-up and with her dignity intact.

Cam gave her an encouraging smile and brought her hands to his lips, kissing her knuckles.

'Take your time sweetie' he murmured. 'We've got the rest of our lives.'

Hope replied with a nervous chuckle. 'The first time we met, I'll admit that my reaction was a bit… superficial. You walked into the back room of the gallery while I was getting ready to teach a class. You introduced yourself and you told me that my dad had hired you to work there part-time. My first thought when I looked into your eyes was… 'this guy's a hunk'.'

Cam chuckled, recalling their first encounter.

'You had that artist bohemian vibe going on, the long hair, those soulful eyes and the first thing I did when I got home was to call Olivia and tell her about the cute guy working at the gallery who'd smiled at me. At first, it was just a lark, a good looking guy flirting with me but before long, it became obvious that this was turning into more than just a casual thing. I began to see past your physical attributes and I got to know the sweet, gentle, soft spoken man hidden underneath. I'll admit it took me a while to figure things out. First we were on, then we were off, then we were on again… But this immutable force kept bringing me back to you, time after time until I finally clued in that life had a plan for the two of us.'

'Father Bertrand' she said, addressing the priest. 'I know that traditional wedding vows include a promise to love and to honour in sickness and in health' she began. 'But I think we can probably skip the sickness part where Cam is concerned. He's already fulfilled his end of the bargain.'

Cam smiled gently and squeezed her hand.

'I think pretty well everybody here knows what happened to me four years ago. We were still celebrating our engagement when fate intervened and threatened to separate us forever. Words are easy… 'I love you, I'll always be there…' People say that kind of thing all the time without much thought for the weight of the commitment they're making. But actions, as the old saying goes, actions speak louder than words. The truth is…Cam, you gave me the will to live.'

Cameron's eyes narrowed and his breathing grew shallow as he fought off tears.

'My family has always been there for me, supporting me, cheering me on. They were there for me every single day as I fought to climb out of that deep dark hole and I'll always be grateful to them. But that's kind of the contract, you know, when it's family… you expect them to be there for you as you would be for them. But you… you wonderful, wonderful man, you reminded me every day that we had made a promise to each other to share our lives and you kept me focussed on the future. Our future. Ultimately, that's what kept me sane. Those long hours, days and months glued to my hospital bed… you kept telling me that we had plans and you were not going to let me weasel out of them. Cam, you carried me on your shoulders when I didn't have the strength to walk, you gave me hope when I felt like giving up, you reminded me of our promise when I couldn't see past another day of pain and despair.’

'But that's only one of the reasons I love you. You are loving and gentle, patient and forgiving, loyal and faithful' she said, hesitating for a moment. '…you make me laugh and… and you're hot.'

The room erupted in giggles - many through tears.

'You and I still have so much to learn and I know that, together, we can navigate the rough times ahead. After what we've been through, I know better than to promise you smooth sailing. I know all too well that the winds are not mine to control. But I vow to work with you every day so we can build a ship that will carry us safely and sails that will allow us to weather any storm.'

Hope exhaled and Father Bertrand signalled that it was time for the best man to hand the bride the ring. Liam fiddled in his pocket, pretending to have trouble locating it, hamming it up. There was chuckling as he finally handed his sister the plain gold band.

'Cameron Armstrong, I take you as you are, loving who you are now and who you have yet to become. I promise to listen and learn from you, to support you and accept your support. I will celebrate your triumphs and mourn your losses as though they were my own. I will love you and have faith in your love for me, through all our years and all that life may bring us.'

Sniffling could be heard in the church although in the case of Neal and Sara, it was bordering on sobs. 

Cameron looked down at his hand, admiring the shiny, new wedding band and he wiped his eyes, taking a couple of deep breaths so he could focus on what he wanted to say.

'Hope… my beautiful, wonderful Hope… Whenever I think of you, which is pretty well all the time, there's one word that comes instantly to mind. Sure, there's joy and laughter and love and commitment but above all else, there's gratitude. Gratitude that God put you on my path, gratitude that you saw something in me that day at the gallery - even if it was shallow' he added with a grin.

'Gratitude that you fell in love with me, that you've agreed to share your life with me and gratitude that, after today and forever more, I will be the lucky son of a gun who will be your husband and you will be my wife. Your hopes and dreams have become mine and my hopes and dreams have become yours. There is you, wonderful you, perfectly complete in every way and there is me, not so perfect me with my own personal hopes and dreams. And then, there is us with our shared hopes and dreams for the future, a future where I could never be happy if you're not happy.'

Hope could feel the emotions rising as the tears began to form in her eyes. Dammit, he was going to ruin her make-up, wasn't he?

'Hope, my heart soars when I see that smile on your face, when I hear your carefree laugh, when you succeed at something that's important to you. And I thank God every day that I signed up for your dad's class in art history and that he invited me into the gallery and into your lives. You and I are lucky to have had loving parents to show us the way. My mom and dad, your mom and dad… they're still very much in love with each other after all these years. They've shown us that the road might be bumpy at times but if you hold on to each other really tight, if you listen with your heart, if you support each other… well, we'll never have to face anything alone again.'

'I love you Hope. I love your strength, I love your crazy sense of humour, your persistence, your resilience and your uncanny ability to adapt to situations no matter how hard things get. You showed me what courage was all about, you showed me how to rise above hardship and come out the other side, stronger than before. You make me a better man and because you're by my side, I've learned to open my heart and to embrace all that life has to offer, to celebrate success and to stand strong in the face of adversity.’

He paused for a moment, bringing his hand to rest gently on her cheek. 'Sometimes when I look at you, it's as if my heart's going to explode out of my chest. I trust you to see the real me, the vulnerable me, and I trust you to be honest with me and support me as I strive to become a better man, a better husband and someday, God willing, a better father.'

Liam knew the drill, he took out the second ring and handed it to Cam, without hesitation this time.

'Hope Ellis Caffrey, I take you as you are, loving who you are now and who you have yet to become. I promise to listen and learn from you, to support you and accept your support. I will celebrate your triumphs and mourn your losses as though they were my own. I will love you and have faith in your love for me, through all our years and all that life may bring us.'

WCWCWC

Once the ceremony ended, there was an eruption of competing sounds. Loud applause mingled with the church bells and the powerful voice of Natalie Cole was heard as she belted out 'This will be' to the utter joy of all in attendance. Hope and Cam half walked, half boogied down the aisle, high fiving the guests as they headed out to the front of the church for the requisite picture taking.

There was sunshine and smiles and laughter. An hour later, the group had assembled for the wedding meal at the restaurant down the street.

WCWCWC

By eight o'clock, everyone had feasted on a meal of antipasti followed by a fish course and finally a main course of pasta. There'd been canned music during dinner but shortly before dessert, Cam's friend Tito Johnson showed up and began to set up his equipment for a night of dancing and partying. Dessert was served and the time came for a few words from the father of the groom, the father of the bride as well as the best man and maid of honour. Fred Armstrong stuck to a carefully scripted toast, telling all those in attendance that his son had always made he and his wife proud, never so much as today. He reiterated their joy at the fact that Cameron had found his soulmate and invited everyone to toast the newlyweds.

Sara sat with her hand in Neal's and listened. Emotions were running high for both of them and she noticed that Neal appeared hesitant about taking a sip from that damn glass of champagne sitting in front of him. As Fred finished his toast, she watched Neal pick up the glass and with his lips barely touching the edge, take a mere sip before rising to say a few words of his own.

'I'd also like to propose a toast' he began, lifting his glass. 'I'm sure you've all heard the expression 'mixed feelings'. Well, after today I have a new definition for that often used expression: mixed feelings is watching your little girl get married.'

He snuck a quick glance in Hope's direction; she was laughing with abandon as she sat next to her new husband.

'Today is the happiest day of her life and as her dad, I am beyond thrilled that she has found her true love but I must admit to feeling a tightness in my chest, knowing that I am no longer the only man in her life. As an overprotective dad, I've been watching this romance blossom for the past few years and even if I'd set out on a trip around the world to find a man worthy of my little girl, I could not have done better than Cameron Armstrong. As Cam mentioned, he was once a student of mine and I was impressed with his talent and his maturity. I put my art gallery in his capable hands and he's never let me down but then… well, it appears he wanted more and now, he's come back for my daughter.'

There was loud laughter and Cam turned to Hope and kissed her as the crowd cheered.

Neal continued. 'But seriously… Hope is a beautiful, intelligent young woman, more than capable of making her own decisions and I definitely approve of her choice in a husband. Now, all that's left is for me and Sara to wish them as much joy and happiness as we've had.'

He lifted his glass and Sara could see his hand was trembling; all the conflicting emotions had apparently come home to roost.

'Hope and Cam' Neal concluded 'from this day forward, you will never be alone. You will always have each other. And you will also have your families and friends to offer their support along the way. Congratulations to the two of you. We love you both.'

He could feel the emotions bubbling to the surface, getting the better of him and this time when he brought the glass to his lips, he took a huge gulp, almost downing the whole contents in one swig. As the applause faded, Sara noticed his brow furrow and his shoulders droop. Without even so much as a glance in her direction, he got to his feet and hurriedly headed towards the exit without looking back.

She was about to follow him out when, from across the room, she noticed Peter glancing their way. He made eye contact with her and nodded. He could read his best friend's body language like no one else and without saying a word, Neal had just sent up a warning flare, an SOS. Peter was on the move and Sara let out a sigh of relief as she watched him follow her husband out the door.

TBC


	76. Chapter 76

As beautiful as the day had been, so too was the night. The full moon hung in the sky, so big and round, you could almost reach out and touch it. The weather had turned milder and several of the guests had stepped out for a breath of fresh air before the music started while others were grabbing a quick smoke and enjoying the warm night air. 

Neal found a quiet spot on the large wraparound porch surrounding the restaurant and leaned over the railing, staring out at the night. He wasn't sure why he’d run out like that. All he knew was that he needed to step away for a moment and compose himself, try to put some semblance of order in his muddled mind, get as far away as possible from that half-full glass of champagne he’d just been lusting for. 

He was grateful Sara hadn't followed him out. To be honest, he needed a minute alone to try to figure things out.

He thought of the glass of wine he’d had a few weeks back at the Topping Rose House. The night he and Sara had had their little confrontation. Dinner in the hotel restaurant had been nice - up until he’d blurted out his confession and Sara had stormed off into the night. 

He’d expected all hell to break loose when he’d taken that first sip of Barolo. He hadn't had a drink in 43 months and 22 days when he’d brought the glass to his lips that night. But to his surprise, the sky hadn't fallen, the world hadn't stopped turning, he had not fallen to pieces nor had he tried to bargain for another glass. 

It had been… nice. Just nice. Pleasant. 

A nice addition to the meal, nothing more. He hadn't given it more than a passing thought after that first sip. On the contrary, his recollection of that evening centred on Sara’s smiling face, the dress she’d been wearing, the way her eyes had sparkled in the candlelight. He’d let the velvety smooth wine glide down his throat, his eyes on his beautiful wife as they enjoyed their meal. He wasn't sure what, exactly, he’d expected but, to be honest, the whole experience had been rather anti climatic. 

So what had happened tonight? Why was he feeling like a blubbering mess? Maybe it was because he’d come in feeling invincible. A glass of champagne: piece of cake, he’d told himself. No reason for it to be otherwise. 

He stared down at his hands, noticing they were shaking. Why had he felt an almost irresistible urge to drain that glass of champagne, pour himself another and grab a fresh bottle and come out here and drink it by himself? 

‘Hey’ came Peter’s voice from behind.

‘Hey’ Neal replied without bothering to turn around and look at him.

‘Beautiful night, huh?’

Neal nodded but didn't speak. Instead, he let out a shaky breath.

‘You did a great job with your toast in there, did you just come up with that on the fly?’

‘Mostly…’

He heard Peter scoff and he turned to face him.

‘What?’

‘I wish I had your ability to speak like that, off the cuff.’

Neal seemed to relax. ‘You do just fine Peter, don’t sell yourself short.’

When he got a good look at his best friend’s eyes, he picked up on a flicker of concern and Neal realized he’d been conned into engaging in conversation when what he really wanted was to be left alone.

‘You know what you are good at?’ he asked.

Peter shrugged and tried his best to look innocent. 

Neal smiled and shook his head, not buying it for a minute. ‘You’re good at getting people to open up.’

‘Is that what I was doing?’ Peter asked earnestly.

Neal turned away from him, leaning on the ledge once more and returning his gaze to the clear night sky. It wasn't completely dark yet, the horizon still delightfully pink. He could see the outline of faraway buildings, like dark cutouts against the distant skyline. A few stray stars had appeared up above and Neal studied their placement, pretending to look for constellations.

He pointed upwards. ‘Did you know that the largest constellation by area is Hydra? It takes up 3.16% of the sky’ he said, staring up at the sky. ‘The smallest is Crux.’

‘That right?’ Peter mumbled.

‘One night, when we were up at the cottage in Muskoka, we got this amazing view of Ursa Major’ Neal continued. ‘Liam was about four or five; he fell asleep in my arms sitting out on the dock. He refused to go to bed… said he wanted to watch the stars until the sun came up.’

Peter nodded and smiled. He waited a few minutes before speaking. 

‘You want to tell me what that was all about in there?’

He saw Neal’s shoulders rise then fall and heard him sigh loudly.

‘Fear of losing control, I guess.’

Peter leaned against the railing, mimicking Neal’s posture. Two best friends standing side by side in the still of the night.

‘Ah! The infamous Caffrey curse - the struggle to control your impulses’ Peter said with a touch of levity.

Neal shrugged again but didn't look away from the darkening sky.

‘The moon’s pretty tonight huh?’ he murmured, not yet willing to share what was on his mind. ‘Did you know that the full moon in May is called the flower moon?’

Peter gave him a wary look. ‘Neal, it’s been over thirty years, deflection doesn’t work with me anymore, you know that.’

Neal turned sideways to face his old friend. ‘All right’ he sighed.

He took a cleansing breath before continuing. ‘Sometimes I feel control slipping away from me when it comes to booze.’

‘What are you talking about? I was watching you, you barely had a mouthful of champagne’ Peter said, frowning. ‘Anyway, you told me you’d prepared for this… when you had that glass of wine a few weeks back.’

‘I did’ Neal said, returning his gaze to the bright, orange moon.

Someone let out a high pitched laugh from inside the hall and Neal smiled in response. It was nice to know people were having a good time.

‘Then what’s the problem? It looked to me like you were plenty in control in there.’ 

Neal let out a puff of air but didn’t move. ‘I guess I can still fool you some of the time’ he said with an air of derision.

‘Neal…’

He shook his head. ‘You don't understand Peter’ he mumbled in frustration.

‘I want to’ the other man replied patiently. ‘Why don’t you try to explain it to me… and I’ll try to understand?’

Neal stood there in silence, searching for the right words. He wasn't sure he quite understood it himself.

‘It’s not about how much I drink Peter, it’s about the feeling I get before I…’

He stopped suddenly, perhaps to give his brain a chance to catch up to his mouth. Peter waited; he knew better than to push too hard. With Neal, it was always best to let him come to you. Otherwise, there was the danger he’d totally shut down and then no matter how hard you tried to get him to open up again, he would close up tighter than a clam with lockjaw. The only way to get Neal Caffrey to share what was on his mind was to shut up and let him tell you in his own good time. 

The two men stood side by side in silence for a few minutes. The air was cool but the soft breeze was pleasant. They could hear crickets in the flower beds below them, voices coming from the other side of the building. In the distance, they could hear voices and laughter from inside. 

Finally, Peter’s gamble paid off and Neal began to talk again.

‘When Sara and I went away to the resort and I had that glass of wine, it was nice. I enjoyed it, the taste, the aroma. We took our time… I even liked the mild buzz I got off of it. It was… fine but it wasn’t, you know, it wasn't as big deal as I thought it would be.’

‘So what happened tonight? You’d been planning to have that glass of champagne. How is that any different?’

Neal shrugged. ‘It just didn’t… feel right.’

He stopped talking and frowned, looking mildly annoyed although it was unclear whether he was pissed off at himself or at Peter for prodding him. 

‘It’s like… tonight I chugged it down to cope with the way I was feeling. When I had that glass of wine a few weeks back, it was just, I don’t know, a nice part of the meal… I wasn't drinking it because I was upset, or angry or scared. It was just a nice glass of wine. No more, no less.’

He spoke slowly, as if he were figuring things out as he went along. ‘Tonight… it feels like my emotions are all over the map. There’s Hope… don’t get me wrong, I’m so happy for her but I’m going to miss her. Everything around me is changing Peter. My mom is gone, Liam’s not living at home anymore, soon Caitlin will move out on her own. And then there’s Sara… she looks so beautiful tonight. I can’t stop thinking about our wedding day, how excited I was about us becoming a family.’

Peter nodded but bit his tongue.

‘So I’ve got all this happening inside my head all at once and I started to feel overwhelmed… and then there’s this glass of champagne in my hand and instead of just… sipping it and enjoying it like a normal human being, suddenly I’m chugging it down and… I don’t know, it was like I was drinking to… dull some of those intense emotions. That’s not what booze is for Peter and I never used it that way before Hope’s accident. After I finished with the toast, I wasn't even thinking… it was a reflex. I got caught up in all those emotions and I lost control for just a second and drank it down… I panicked and then I got scared that if I started drinking, I wouldn’t be able to stop.’

Peter studied his face, the anguish in his eyes. He hated to see his best friend struggling like this. Every time it appeared the battle was won, it would resurface again - like some sick game of whack a mole.

‘So what you’re saying is, it’s about mindfulness?’ he said, searching Neal’s eyes.

Neal chuckled. ‘Why Peter Burke, where did you learn a fancy word like that?’

‘I know stuff’ Peter replied, a touch defensive. ‘I know plenty of stuff.’

Peter could see tears forming in Neal’s eyes. ‘Jim says that it’s all about keeping alcohol in its place; if you can take it or leave it and you can enjoy it for what it is, you can probably handle drinking but if you start to… need it or use it as a means to an end, that’s when you can get into trouble. I guess tonight I freaked out because all of a sudden, it felt like I needed it.’

‘Sounds like you’ve given this a lot of thought’ Peter said. ‘And that tells me you’re learning how to deal with it Neal.’

Neal shrugged, seemingly unconvinced.

‘Do you have any idea how far you’ve come since the day we had that intervention? You pulled yourself out of that hole and you decided you were going to beat this thing… and then you stuck to your guns. I’m proud of you, buddy.’

Peter’s hand came to rest on his back and Neal seemed to relax in response to the unexpected physical contact. He turned to face his best friend and smiled. 

‘How do you always do that?’

‘Do what?’

‘Make me feel better’ Neal said. 

Peter shrugged. ‘I don’t know. I don’t have all the answers. But what I do know is that you’ve struggled a lot these past few years. And like I told you that day, I’m here for you, always. Anywhere… anytime. I might not understand exactly what you’re going through or know exactly how to help but I’ll always listen. No matter what.’

The tears were back in Neal’s eyes again but this time they were tears of gratitude at the realization he had someone like Peter Burke to lean on.

‘I mean it Neal. I’m really proud of you’ Peter added, his voice shaky.

The two men fell into each other’s arms and stood there, hugging as the crickets chirped and the echo of laughter continued off in the distance. 

‘Thank you’ Neal mumbled, his face buried in Peter’s neck.

‘You’re welcome buddy.’

WCWCWC

‘Mom, where’s Dad? We’re about to cut the cake?’

‘He just went out to get some fresh air’ Sara said, downplaying the fact that Neal had cut out in the middle of the celebration without so much as a word of explanation. 

‘Oh look, there he is’ she added with relief as Neal and Peter appeared in the doorway.

Hope turned and waved excitedly in her dad’s direction. ‘Cake!’ she mouthed as he smiled and gave her a thumbs up.

Sara could see he was looking a lot calmer than before his precipitous exit. He walked over to her with a smile on his face: not one hundred percent genuine but close enough to fool most.

To the unspoken question, he leaned in and kissed her cheek. ‘I’m okay babe. I’ll tell you all about it later.’

For now, that would have to do.

‘So, what do you say, mother of the bride’ he said, reaching for her hand. ‘Shall we go watch the newlyweds cut the cake? If we’re lucky, maybe I’ll get a corner piece.’

Sara took the hand he’d extended and followed him over to where El had set up the three tier cake. People assembled all around to witness the newlyweds carry out another wedding tradition.

Neal had just gotten his hands on a corner piece of red velvet cake when the baritone voice of Tito Johnson was heard, inviting Cam and Hope to take to the floor for their first dance. 

There were so many wonderful songs to choose from and after a lengthy discussion, Hope and Cam had settled on ‘At Last’. Cam liked it because it was slow and languorous, soulful and sensuous. Hope liked the sentiment. The groom put out his hand for his new bride and walked her over to the dance floor, lacing his arms around her waist and pulling her close. The guests cheered loudly but the newlyweds didn’t hear them; they were lost in each others’ eyes. 

‘Hey Mrs. Armstrong’ Cam cooed in his wife’s ear as they swayed. 

She chuckled in response to the inside joke; Hope had no intention of changing her name but she was playing along for her in-laws’ sake, especially her mother-in-law who was quite the traditionalist when it came to all things marital - or pre-marital. 

Hope’s eyes sparkled. ‘Hey Mr. Ellis-Caffrey’ she replied with a naughty grin.

He looked down at her with puppy dog eyes. ‘I don’t care what last name you use as long as you remember you’re my wife.’

She nodded. ‘Forever and always’ she replied as they locked lips.

The crowd went crazy, flashbulbs going off all over the place as the two of them hammed it up for the cameras. Cam ran his hands languorously over his wife’s hips and dipped her in his arms to the catcalls of most of the men - and some of the women.

Tito invited the bride and groom’s parents to join them and Fred, Bonnie, Neal and Sara stepped out to the hoots and hollers of the guests. The two older couples took a few turns around the dance floor and about three quarters of the way through the song, they were invited to switch it up in different permutations, Neal and Fred taking turns with the bride and Sara and Bonnie with the groom.

Once Etta James had crooned her last note, the dancing was declared officially open and guests wandered over to join the couples already dancing. The slow, languid rhythm of the ballad gave way to a pulsating beat as the younger crowd got into the act, hands up in the air, bodies gyrating. 

Liam found Cody standing in line at the bar and reached out for him. ‘Let’s go boogie babe.’

‘You sure about this?’ Cody asked, hesitating. 

‘Absolutely’ Liam said, pulling him insistently towards the floor.

‘What about…’ Cody asked with a head nod in the direction of the senior Armstrongs who were struggling to keep up with the unmistakeable sound of the Black Eyed Peas.

Liam stepped in closer, his hand resting on Cody’s waist. ‘Seriously? This, from the guy who lobbied successfully for a monthly gay dance at White Plains High?’ 

Cody shrugged; he wasn’t usually shy about their relationship - quite the opposite. He was out and proud but this was Hope and Cam’s special day and he didn't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable - notably Hope’s new ultra conservative in-laws. 

‘It’s fine’ Liam said reassuringly. ‘We’re safe, we’re with family.’

‘Guys!’ came Cam’s voice over the loud music. ‘What are you waiting for? Are you going to dance or argue all night?’

Liam gave his boyfriend an eyebrow wag and that was all it took. Cody was all in, following him to the dance floor, moving skillfully to the pulsing beat. 

After a couple of songs, the older generation began to drop out, settling in at the surrounding tables to watch the youngsters dance their little hearts out. Rhonda and Lucy were burning off all that unspent energy and it was only a question of time before they both crashed. In the meantime, they were having the time of their lives. Some of the singles sat around while others just took to the floor in different combinations without regard for whether or not they had a dance partner. Will Allenby, who’d come solo, spotted Caitlin chatting with Becky and made his way over. 

‘You two up to hitting the dance floor?’ he asked them as they followed him out without hesitation. 

There was plenty of hootin’ and hollerin’, singing, laughing and original dance moves, some more sophisticated and G-rated than others. The bride and groom led the way; it didn't take long for Hope to kick off her four inch heels and hike up her dress as Cam showed off some of his more adventurous moves. To everyone’s surprise, Elizabeth managed to drag Mozzie out to the dance floor for a couple of songs but soon enough, they gave up and joined Neal and Sara who were sitting on the sidelines with Peter, Emily, the Jordans, the Masons and the Armstrongs.

The seniors club. 

‘You want to get some air?’ Neal shouted in his wife’s ear.

He felt he owed her at least a partial explanation for what had happened earlier. She nodded and the two of them slipped out, relieved to be leaving the blaring music behind for a few minutes. 

‘It’s crazy in there!’ Neal commented as the music grew dimmer behind them. He led her to the spot where he’d had his little chat with Peter. It had gotten a little cooler but it was still a beautiful evening and the stars were fully on display. 

He cornered her up against the railing, his arms boxing her in on either side as they both stared out at the sky. 

‘Have I told you how beautiful you look tonight?’ he whispered in her ear.

‘Only about a dozen times’ she replied as she turned to face him. 

She ran her hand down the front of his jacket adjusting his pocket square. ‘You don’t look too shabby yourself.’

He sighed, his eyes glued to hers. ‘You know what? I’ve been thinking about our wedding all day’ he admitted. 

The look on his face was… wistful, the kind of look you get when you recall some faraway memory that still puts a smile on your face, years later.  
‘I can still see you coming down the stairs’ he said, gazing at her. ‘Your hair… your dress… your bouquet. I remember it all so vividly: my heart beating out of my chest, the sound of birds in garden, the look on everyone’s face when you walked in, Hope babbling in June’s arms.’

Sara smiled, the memories flooding back. She nodded.

Neal ran his hand down her cheek longingly. ‘I didn't think it was possible but you look even more beautiful today than you did twenty-four years ago’ he said, leaning in to deposit a soft kiss on her lips. ‘And I love you more each day.’ 

Sara sighed, sliding her arm around his back. ‘Today’s been tough on you, huh Caffrey?’ she murmured.

‘Just dealing with a lot of competing emotions’ he replied with a sigh. ‘I can’t believe our baby is a married woman.’

Sara looked up to capture his gaze. ‘So, what happened earlier? When you chugged down that champagne?’

He should have know his actions wouldn’t escape his wife’s careful scrutiny. More than anyone, she knew his moods, his constantly changing state of mind, his tells - and his struggles.

‘I’m still figuring it out. For some reason, I panicked…’ he admitted. He looked her straight in the eye. ‘Do you mind if we talk about it later?’ he asked, wrapping his arms tightly around her. 

She nodded. ‘Okay.’ 

‘Because right now, all I want to do is hold my beautiful wife in my arms and enjoy the full moon—’

The sound of the DJ’s voice floated all the way outside, his deep baritone capturing their attention. 

‘I’ve got a special request here from the bride’ they heard him say. ‘A special song for her mom and dad.’

Neal and Sara stared at each other, frowning. What was that all about? It took just a few chords for them to recognize their song, the one they’d danced to at their wedding and still danced to every year on their anniversary. 

‘Looks like our daughter wants us to take a little spin on the dance floor’ Sara said, glancing towards the restaurant. 

‘I’ve got a better idea. What do you say we stay out here?’ Neal suggested, pulling her close and beginning to sway. He kissed her again and let his lips wander behind her ear. ‘It’s a lot more private than that crowded dance floor.’

Sara moaned in reply. ‘I like the way you think Caffrey.’ 

Neal began to sing along to the familiar song and Sara let him serenade her under the brightly lit sky. The gorgeous moon shone above them, the stars twinkled, the leaves in the trees hummed softly against the warm spring breeze. It was the perfect opportunity to let Al Green’s crooning voice carry them back to another place and another time.

WCWCWC

The Caffreys were back inside the hall enjoying the company of their guests when the music stopped, the punishing beat making way for a soft ballad as people headed to the bar for refreshments. Most of the younger crowd had been going strong for over an hour and they needed to hydrate if they wanted to go back for round two.

Tito was back at the microphone again. ‘Ladies and gentlemen’ he announced with his commanding voice. ‘The time has come for a very special song chosen by the bride. I’d like to invite Hope and her dad to take the floor for the traditional father daughter dance.’

Neal glanced at Sara and wagged his eyebrows. He’d known this moment was coming and he knew it would be another roller coaster ride of emotions. Hope had insisted on keeping her choice of song a secret from her dad and he’d gone along with it; let’s face it, he’d be a basket case no matter what song she’d decided on. Just having a few moments alone with his beautiful daughter was good enough for him. She’d be heading out on her honeymoon in the morning and wouldn’t be back for a week; every second he could spend with her in the meantime was an added bonus. Neal made his way to the table where Hope was sitting with her new husband.

‘Mind if I borrow your beautiful bride for a few minutes?’ he asked Cam.

Cam got to his feet and reached out for Hope’s hand, placing in her dad’s waiting hand. The gesture choked Neal up and the song hadn't even started. He braced himself for an emotional few minutes and it didn't take long for him to recognize the song Hope had chosen to share with him. 

He’d heard it many times, never without shedding a tear. He steeled himself and walked her over to the dance floor as silence fell in the hall, all eyes on the proud father and his little girl.

‘Daddy…’ Hope said, tears in her eyes.

Neal drew her near, his hand on the small of her back as she settled in his arms. They didn't speak, letting the words of the familiar song do the talking for them. The choice she’d made couldn't have been more appropriate to the two of them and they began to sway to the song’s gentle rhythm.

‘In my daughter’s eyes, I am a hero.   
I am strong and wise and I know no fear.   
But the truth is plain to see, she was sent to rescue me.   
I see who I want to be in my daughter’s eyes.’

It was all so true. Hope’s unexpected arrival in his crazy, mixed up life had been a defining moment, a veritable turning point. Her imminent birth had been the catalyst which had inspired him to finally make a choice: after years of struggle, he’d finally figured out he wanted to be a man and not a con. 

And in that sense, she had saved him. 

From himself. 

Sara sat at the table and watched, tears streaming down her face. They both loved their daughter but the relationship between Neal and Hope was like no other and Sara had never begrudged them their unique bond. She watched her husband’s face as he danced with their little girl, his love for her apparent in his eyes. 

Neal and Hope struggled through the dance, crying as they held each other. Halfway through, Neal stopped trying and let himself sob as she held him. He knew things would be changing in the coming months but there was one thing that would always remain. They would always share a special connection; that would never change. 

Not until the day he took his dying breath. 

WCWCWC

Packed suitcases awaited the newlyweds as they opened the door to Cam’s - make that Hope and Cam’s - apartment. It was a little past two in the morning. Hope was carrying her shoes in her hands and Cam had long ago loosened his tie and removed his tux jacket. Hope giggled, drunk on love as Cam swept her up in his arms and carried her over the threshold and straight into the bedroom. 

He threw her down on the bed and took a moment to kick off his shoes before joining her. They lay there panting in their wedding clothes, staring into each other’s eyes until their breathing finally quieted. 

‘What an amazing day!’ Hope said, running her fingers through Cam’s hair.

He nodded but said nothing, seemingly mesmerized by her eyes.

He chuckled and shook his head as he recalled the embarrassing incident at the church. ‘I’m never going to live it down, am I?’

His face grew tight, his brow furrowed as a horrible thought crossed his mind. ‘You don’t suppose somebody took a picture of me when I did that face plant on the church floor, do you?’

Hope laughed; it was funny now but it had been anything but at the time. 

‘A picture? No. A video, probably’ she replied with a good natured-grin. ‘It’s probably on Facebook, Twitter and Instagram. My bet is it’s been retweeted dozens of times by now. Maybe it’s even gone viral.’

Cam groaned and let himself fall on his back. ‘Awwww! Jeez!’

Hope propped herself up on her elbow and leaned in to kiss him. ‘I’m just glad you’re all right. You scared the living daylights out of me.’ 

He reached up, kissed the tip of her nose. ‘You know I blame you’ he said playfully. ‘You were just so goddamn beautiful, you knocked the wind right out of me. Those eyes… that smile…’

She nodded exaggeratedly. ‘Riiiiight… that must be it. You’re just going to have to learn how to cope with having a beautiful wife.’

‘Wife…’ he repeated wistfully. ‘That’s going to take a little getting used to. ‘Yes, this is my wife, Hope’… ‘Oh, have you met my wife?’… ‘Has anybody seen my wife?’’

Hope giggled and leaned over to kiss him again, trying her best to distract him. Her soft lips, the scent of her perfume… it did the trick, taking his mind off his fall from grace. 

‘Just promise me you’ll never do that to again’ Hope murmured, running her finger along his jawline languidly.

‘Promise’ he whispered. 

She ran her hand through his hair which had been trimmed shorter than she’d ever seen it in all the years she’d known him. It suited him. 

‘By the way, I’m really digging the hair’ she said. ‘It gives you an air of respectability.’

‘Well, I’m a married man now’ he countered.

He let his hand linger in her hair and a tendril escaped the tidy chignon. The soft curl fell onto her shoulder and immediately bounced back up, returning to its natural state. 

‘And you look like somebody’s wife’ he said as he twirled his finger around the loose lock of hair. ‘Oh yeah, that’s right… my wife.’

Hope reached up and began to gingerly scratch her scalp; the up do had been nice to have for the occasion but now she couldn’t wait to take it down and give her head a good shampooing. 

‘Itchy?’ he asked as she grimaced.

She nodded and reached for one of the hairpins holding her bun in place.

‘Here’ he said, sliding up to sit against the headboard. ‘Come sit up here and I’ll help you with that.’

Hope struggled to sit up, her dress twisted up underneath her. She slithered up the bed settling in between his legs, her back pressed up against his chest.

Cam started to poke around her hairdo, gently removing hairpins one after the other and laying them beside him on the bed. Hope relaxed in response to his gentle touch. There must have been three dozen of those damn things in her hair and Cam searched them out with the patience of a saint while Hope started to feel herself relax. 

He massaged her scalp, making sure he’d gotten every last one of them and watched as her thick wavy mane started to tumble onto her shoulders. 

‘I think I’ve got them all out’ he said, reaching for her hair brush by the bedside.

It wasn't the first time he’d brushed her hair but it was stiff from so much hair product and Hope winced as he tried to pull the brush through the thick tangled mess. 

‘Sorry babe’ he said, slowing down, taking his time.

‘I must have three cans of hair spray in there’ Hope said, her voice sleepy.

She glanced over her shoulder at her new husband and he chuckled good-naturedly at the sight of her. Her hair poked out in all directions, making her look like she’d just stuck her finger in an electric socket.

She ran her hand through her hair as best she could and settled back in his arms, his hands massaging her neck then moving on to her shoulders and finally landing on the zipper of her dress. She heard him moan as he began to tug at her zipper, baring her neck, then her shoulders and pressing his lips against her naked skin.

‘You looked amazing today baby’ he murmured, lingering on her neck. ‘I almost hate to take this dress off you.’

‘Oh yeah?’ she replied, her voice sultry.

He continued to tug on the zipper, his hands lingering on her bare shoulders for a moment before pushing the dress down further and exposing her bra.

‘Almost’ he murmured, his voice growing rough. 

He gently pulled her arms out of the dress sleeves and kept tugging, the bodice of the gorgeous dress now resting loosely at her waist. His hands moved up from behind to cup her breasts through her lace bra.

‘Ahhhh’ he breathed in her ear. ‘I’ve been wanting to touch you like this all night.’

Hope sighed, enjoying the sensation of his day old growth tickling her neck, her cheek.

She closed her eyes and let him continue his exploration, his hands now moving to unclasp her bra.

‘Baby…’ he murmured in her ear as she let out an unsteady breath. 

He’d just managed to remove her bra when she wriggled out of his grasp. 

He complained noisily like a kid whose mom had taken away the cookie he was about to bite into. 

‘Noooo!’

Hope stood momentarily and squirmed out of her dress, placing it carefully at the foot of the bed and turning to face him in nothing but a garter belt and silk stockings. She’d never worn anything but panty hose before and granted, the silk hosiery was a little uncomfortable but she’d agreed to wear the sexy undergarment at Cam’s request. 

Call it a wedding present. From the look on his face, he approved.

He whistled softly as she stood before him and he sat up a little straighter against the headboard. He gave her a lustful look, his eyes wandering up and down her body, his arms reaching out for her in invitation. 

‘You like that… husband?’

He let out a loud groan and pulled her in closer, eager to get his hands on her. Even with his tuxedo pants, she spotted the telltale bulge and grinned naughtily. 

‘I guess you do’ she said in reply to her own question.

He was totally zoning out now, all the blood draining from his brain to his nether regions. He wasn't sure he could speak even if he tried. Hope swung her leg over his outstretched legs and settled on his lap. Without wasting time, she got to work undressing him, first tugging off his shirt then reaching down for his belt buckle. Cam let his arms fall away while she worked, biting her bottom lip provocatively. That always did it to him. And she knew it.

His arms reached up, caressing her bare breasts and letting out a long hiss. He watched as her eyes fluttered shut and her head fell back, enjoying the feel of his soft hands on her overheated skin. He leaned in, pressing his lips to her collar bone and down to her breasts where he lingered.

‘I love you Cam’ she murmured.

‘Love you babe’ he mumbled, bringing his hands up to frame her face and kissing her deeply, leaving her breathless.

‘Wedding night…’ he murmured as she smiled back, her eyes sparkling. 

He grabbed her by the waist and effortlessly flipped her onto her back as she gave him a mischievous grin. 

‘Why sir…’ she said with a drawl. ‘I’ll have you know I’m a married woman.’

He grinned back at her lustfully. ‘That’s okay, I’m a married man.’

TBC


	77. Chapter 77

‘I can’t explain it any better than that’ Neal said, his voice soft.

The house was deathly quiet, not because the kids were asleep but because he and Sara were home alone - well, except for Emily who was bunking up on the third floor in Hope’s old room. 

Liam and Caitlin were still out; they’d decided they were not yet done partying and despite having sampled the dessert and candy bar offered up at midnight, they’d banded with a bunch of friends to get a bite to eat at a local twenty-four hour diner. 

So much for dancing for five hours straight; it sure worked up an appetite.

Neal continued kneading Sara’s sore and tired feet. He sat up against the headboard as she lay diagonally across the bed, her feet in his lap. He was doing his best to work out the punishing kinks caused by walking around in four inch heels for almost twelve hours straight. He pressed hard against her insole and heard her groan: half pleasure, half pain.

‘Sorry’ he mumbled as he gave her foot a gentle squeeze.

Sara grimaced and looked up. ‘It’s okay, do it again’ she instructed as he chuckled.

Neal thought he knew everything there was to know about women but this torture they inflicted on themselves by wearing narrow stiletto hells… well, he’d never quite understood.

‘Maybe you can drop in on Jim and talk to him about it’ she suggested as he nodded.

She looked up. She could see he was fading fast. His shoulders drooped, his breathing had slowed and he was having trouble keeping his eyes open.

‘All right Caffrey’ she said, sitting up. ‘Half time, your turn.’ 

She heard him sigh and she slithered up the bed and propped herself up against the headboard while he curled up next to her and lay his head on her lap. Sara began rubbing his temples as he let out a moan of pure pleasure. He’d had a nagging headache all night and now that all the merrymaking was over, it seemed to have morphed into a full blown migraine. She, on the other hand, was still on a high following the day’s events - and she was wound up tighter than a coiled spring. 

‘I hope they have a good time on their trip’ she said as Neal’s eyes fluttered shut.

‘Uh huh’ he managed to say. The sensation of her fingers running through his hair, scratching, massaging, rubbing… it was heavenly.

‘She looked so happy, didn’t she?’ Sara said, letting her head fall back on her pillow. ‘And Cam… I didn't know he was going to be wearing a tux. He looked great.’

She glanced down at Neal who lay there in silence, not moving an inch.

‘I like his hair shorter, it really brings out his eyes. Do you think he’ll keep wearing it like that?’

She didn't wait for a response, just kept talking, her way of debriefing after the events of the day. ‘But I do like it longer too, it gets curlier and it gives him that starving artist look…’

‘Not that he’s a starving artist… well, you know what I mean. People expect that kind of bohemian look in an art gallery, it makes it look like he belongs there… That was nice of Hope to ask the DJ to play our song, wasn't it?’ she said, pressing her palms against the back of his neck. 

Neal was silent but it didn't deter her from carrying on. ‘You know I can’t believe that the week after Cam and Hope get back, Peter will be leaving the gallery for good. Have you guys talked about having some sort of party for him?’ 

Her mind wandered. ‘Do you really think he’s happy about this retirement thing? Because I get the feeling it’s more El’s idea than his.’

She was wide awake now, her mind still in overdrive. Her hands kept working efficiently, massaging Neal’s temples vigorously as he let out the occasional sigh of bliss.

‘Liam and Cody seem to have settled right back into their old routine, huh? I’m so happy for them’ she commented. ‘I got the sense Cody was a little nervous about dancing with Liam in front of Bonnie and Fred. You know, I’m not even sure what their views are on homosexuality, she certainly didn't say anything to me about it, not that I would have put up with any derogatory comments. Did she say anything to you?’

‘Neal?’ she said. When he didn't reply, she carried on. ‘Your mom would have loved it’ she said wistfully. ‘You should have seen Hope when we got to the church, she was so proud of those flowers they’d planted… what are they called again?’

‘Crocuses’ Neal grumbled with effort as if he could only manage to pronounce a single word. His face remained planted in his wife’s lap, turned just enough to the right so that he could still breathe.

‘Right, crocuses. They looked nice. And the church… you know, I’ve got to hand it to Elizabeth. Once she figured out exactly what Hope wanted, she pulled back and carried out her wishes to the letter. Cake was good, huh? She said she got it from Magnolia… isn't that where we got our wedding cake?’ she asked to Neal’s silence.

‘Now I’m going to have to stay on the treadmill an extra hour tomorrow to make up for all the food I ate tonight. The pasta was great… you know we should go there for our anniversary next month. I really like that place.’

She felt Neal’s hand tighten around her thigh and squeeze; a weak but unmistakeable sign of life.

‘I gave El a cheque for the DJ and one for the bakery so don’t be surprised when you see our bank statement’ she blathered on. ‘I wonder what time the Armstrongs are leaving tomorrow… maybe we should have invited them over for breakfast.’ 

Neal let out a soft moan and reached for her hand, placing it against the back of his neck, silently directing her to the exact spot where he wanted her to put her magic fingers to work. She got the message and started massaging as he sighed.

Sara giggled softly. ‘Those Armstrong girls are so funny, especially the little one, Lucy. She asked me why we didn't visit the Empire State Building every single weekend.’

Neal’s breathing deepened and despite a soft snore, Sara continued. 

‘Em’s flight is in the afternoon… around three. I thought I’d drive her in, maybe leave a little earlier and get a bite to eat on our way to the airport. Did you want to come along?’

Silence, total silence this time.

‘Honey?’

More silence.

She leaned down and kissed Neal’s forehead as he stirred. ‘Enough Caffrey?’ she whispered.

He woke just long enough to crack open one eye and forced a look in her direction. ‘One more minute’ he croaked.

WCWCWC 

‘What about this one Dad?’ Hope asked.

‘Let me see the tag… what colour is that one?’

They’d been strolling through their local garden centre for almost an hour and Neal had been hemming and hawing about every single option the girls had put forth for his approval.

‘Too pinkish’ Neal muttered, rejecting Hope’s suggestion.

‘Mr. C!’ came Caitlin’s voice from further down the long row of plants and trees. ‘Come check this one out.’

He and Hope made their way down to join her, flowering plants, trees, bushes and shrubs abounding on either side of them. Neal was clutching the photograph he’d been carrying around with him all afternoon. He glanced at it once more, trying to commit the small detail to memory.

The photograph in his hand was over fifty years old. It had faded from all the years spent in the shoe box that was now kept in the Caffrey basement. The box contained the meagre belongings of Ellen Parker, contents which had been passed on to Neal following her death. 

He remembered the fancy camera she’d used to take the picture. She’d won it at the Trader Joe’s employee Christmas party one year and she’d been so proud of it. It had been presented to her in recognition of her perfect attendance record as a cashier at their location in St. Charles, just north of St. Louis where Neal lived with his mom. For the first few months, she’d carried the thing damn near everywhere she went, taking random pictures of whatever caught her eye.

Neal remembered everything about the day the photograph was taken, an early spring day in St. Louis. Ellen had dropped by and had insisted on getting a picture of him with the new baseball bat she’d brought over for him. Of course the colours in the print were nowhere near as crisp and vivid as anything you might get with any old cell phone these days but he could still make out the red hue of the baseball cap on his head - another gift from Ellen when she’d taken him to see a Cardinals game the previous summer. 

In the photograph, seven-and-a-half-year-old Danny Brooks sat grinning widely on the steps of the building where he lived with his mom. He wore the Cardinals cap and was caressing his brand new baseball bat as if it were some long lost treasure. Next to him, sat Tim Koslawski, Danny’s bestie all through elementary school. Tim had vibrant orange hair, mischievous eyes and a face full of freckles. He was the class clown and he loved to ham in up. He stared back at the camera with his eyes crossed, his tongue sticking out and a baseball at the end of his arm as if he’d just caught a pop fly out in centre field at Busch Stadium. 

Neal smiled, recalling the friendship he had with the other boy. They had been close… but not close enough for Danny to confide the deep dark secrets of his painful existence, living with his mom.

He shook off the bittersweet memory and focussed his attention on the left side of the picture where a flowering lilac tree was clearly visible, right by the steps. The tree bloomed such a short time every spring but he recalled how his mom waited patiently for the blooms to appear, checking the buds daily as excitement grew. It was one of a very few good things in her life. And consequently, in his. 

He recalled the day he’d found his mom sitting out on those steps, trying without success to chase the persistent blues that had gotten a firm hold on her. 

‘Danny’ she’d told her son, her voice thick with drink. ‘This lilac tree is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen. The colour makes my heart sing.’ 

The recollection tugged at his heartstrings and he glanced down at the picture one last time before comparing the shade in the photograph to the one on the tag Caitlin was holding. Ellen’s camera might be long gone but the picture she’d taken all those years ago held a vital clue in Neal’s search for the perfect match to honour his mom.

He placed the image next to the tag and squinted. 

‘No, that’s a little too light’ he said as Caitlin sighed and moved on to the next one.

Having to choose a flowering plant that wouldn't bloom again for another nine or ten months wasn't an easy task - if you were looking to get just the right shade and variety. 

‘This is a pretty close match’ Neal said, holding the photograph up and comparing it to the tag on a three foot plant. ‘President Lincoln lilac’ he read from the tag. ‘Grows eight feet tall, ten feet wide…’

‘I think this is the one girls!’ he declared with a satisfied grin.

WCWCWC

May had turned to June and with that, the newlyweds returned to work at the Raphael with Cam taking over the management of the establishment in the wake of Peter’s retirement. Life was slowly returning to normal - or at least a new normal. Liam was home for the summer, thrilled to be spending time with Cody and Caitlin was on the verge of making a decision regarding a major for her upcoming freshman year at NYU. 

She and her foster dad had been spearheading the planning for the memorial celebration they’d be having for the late Linda Bennett. Ever since her passing, the urn carrying her ashes had been sitting on the fireplace mantle in the family living room, awaiting its final resting place. Once they’d decided to plant a tree and scatter her ashes at its feet, Caitlin and Neal had begun to discuss where they should plant the tree and more importantly what their choice of tree should be. That was when Neal’s memory had kicked in regarding his mom’s particular affection for the tree in front of their apartment building in St. Louis. A thorough search through Ellen’s box of keepsakes had yielded what Neal had been looking for — a long forgotten photograph.

‘You were so cute at that age’ Caitlin said to her foster dad as she examined the picture. ‘Look at those dimples and those blue eyes.’

‘You know, I think the shape of your face was a lot like Liam’s at that age’ Sara said, hovering over everyone with a pot of coffee in her hands.

Liam looked up from his sandwich and glanced over, examining seven-year-old Neal’s face. ‘I don’t think I look a thing like Dad’ he grunted. ‘When I was a kid, I used to wonder if I’d been adopted.’

Neal scoffed. ‘What are you talking about, you have the almost exact same colouring as your mom and you’ve got the famous Caffrey jawline.’

Liam shrugged and returned to eating his lunch while Caitlin continued to study the photograph. 

‘What did you say the other kid’s name was?’

‘Timmy. Timmy Koslawski’ Neal said wistfully. ‘He was in my class and we used to hang out together. His dad was a cop too.’

Sara topped up Neal’s coffee, eager to change the topic. Neal’s father and his misdeeds were always a sore subject with her husband.  
‘Well, if you guys are going to get that thing planted before dinner, you better get a move on’ she said.

Neal downed his coffee and got to his feet. 

‘Last chance Repo’ he said. ‘You sure that’s where you want it?’

The choice of tree had been all his but he’d left it up to his wife where exactly they should plant it. 

She nodded. ‘Raffie might dig it up if you put it in the backyard’ she reminded him.

Liam took one last bite and stood. ‘I’ll go get the plant and bring it out front.’

‘And I’ll go grab a shovel from the garage’ Neal replied.

WCWCWC

Just before sundown on the first Saturday in June, the extended Caffrey family gathered by the front door of their home where a sapling had been planted hours before. It was still on the small side but the guy at the nursery had explained that it would grow in time, doubling its size in the first year. He’d also guaranteed that it would yield its unique fragrant flowers as early as the following spring. 

Caitlin stood by the front door holding the urn with Linda’s ashes as everyone assembled for one last goodbye. 

‘I thought we could each share something special about Grandma’ she suggested.

‘That’s sounds like a great idea’ Neal said.

Heads nodded all around, followed by an awkward silence for a minute or two.

‘I can start’ Sara said, clearing her throat and taking a step forward. 

‘I met Linda a little over four years ago and I fell in love with her right away. All of a sudden, I had a mother-in-law. But what I hadn't realized at the time was that I was also gaining a friend. It didn't take long for me to discover that she had the same beautiful qualities I’d seen in her son. She was kind, selfless, loving, generous and above all, she was courageous.’

Neal sighed as he listened to his wife’s words. 

‘Linda taught me that having class and having money are two totally different things. She didn't have a lot in the way of worldly possessions but boy, she was one classy lady. She had a quiet elegance about her, from the way she held her head to the way she took an interest in everyone around her. I loved the fact that we shared an unconditional love for the same man. It brought us closer together and I used to love it when she’d tell me stories about Neal when he was a little boy. Her biggest regret was that she hadn't been there for him when he was young and she was determined to make up for it before she left this earth.’ 

She paused for a moment and hung her head in reverence. 

‘Mission accomplished Linda’ she murmured. 

Everybody stood by as Sara stepped closer to Caitlin and took a handful of ashes, scattering them over the freshly turned earth.

Liam was next to take a step forward. 

‘Grandma…’ he said, speaking directly to the small tree. ‘You taught me never to give up. You always had that glint in your eye as if you knew things would be all right even when there was evidence to the contrary. To me, that was a lesson in not giving up on my dreams. Those months Cody and I were apart, you knew how much I was hurting. You knew we would work things out even before I’d figured it out. You had this way of getting me to open up when something was bothering me. You’d just sit and listen and then, without being preachy, you’d find a way to say something inspirational. I’d come home and then I’d hear your voice in my head and suddenly, things would start to make sense.’ 

He shrugged, suddenly embarrassed to be talking to a tree. As his mother had done, he walked over to Caitlin and helped himself to a handful of ashes, disposing of them in the freshly turned earth by the foot of the lilac tree. 

‘I love you Grandma’ he said as the last of the ashes slipped from his hand.

He returned to Cody’s side. Cody glanced surreptitiously from side to side, wanting to say something but not sure whether or not it was appropriate to speak. Neal picked up on his reluctance. 

‘You’re part of the family too Cody’ he said. ‘Do you have something you’d like to say?’

That was just the push Cody needed. He stepped forward. 

‘I do’ he said. ‘I met Mrs. Bennett when she moved here to New York. She was always nice to me whenever Liam and I visited. Once when I was alone with her for a few minutes, she told me how happy she was that Liam had found someone like me, someone who would stand by him and love him unconditionally. She didn't know me very well but she seemed to see right through me, right into my soul and instinctively, she knew how much Liam meant to me. I respected her for having faith in me… faith that I would be there for Liam.’

Caitlin stepped over to where Cody was standing and held out the urn. He took some ashes in his hand and sprinkled them on the ground, returning to take his place next to Liam and slipping his hand in his.

Neal looked around at the faces, noticing tears in Hope’s eyes. He nodded to her and she took a step forward. 

‘Grandma didn't have an easy life… for years and years, she was alone with no one to turn to. She never complained about it, quite the opposite. She felt so lucky to have reconciled with Dad and to have had time with all of us. Without knowing it, she gave me the gift of gratitude. She helped me realize how lucky I am to have all of you around me especially during that period when I was trying to get back on my feet. I realized that if Grandma could find a way to get better, then I could do it too. After I got out of the hospital… for a while, all I could focus on was what I couldn’t do anymore. I couldn't talk without stuttering, I was having trouble walking, I’d given up on my dream of going back to school. Grandma helped me focus on the positive and she reminded me that I was a survivor just like her…’

Hope seemed to want to say more but she began to cry. Neal was just about to walk over and put his arm around her when Cam took a step forward and placed his calm, reassuring hands on his wife’s shoulders. Neal sighed; it was yet another sign that although Hope would always have her mom and dad to look out for her, she now had Cameron and he would always be by her side.

Cam spoke up as he stood next to his wife. ‘To me, Mrs. Bennett personified courage. She was often in pain but she never complained… and she always smiled when we walked into the room even if she was having a rough day. She refused to have regrets and by doing that, she reminded me that even when times are hard, there is still so much beauty around us. I want to take that message with me and pass it on to our own children someday.’

Hope brought her arms around his waist and they held each other for a moment before sprinkling some of the ashes at the foot of the tree. Everyone stood by quietly.

‘Caitlin’ Neal said, taking the urn from her. ‘You haven't said anything yet.’

She looked strong and stoic. Of all the kids, she’d taken Linda’s passing the hardest and she had cried so many tears, there were none left.

She took a step forward, placing her hand on the trunk of the small tree. ‘Grandma…’ she began, her voice strong. ‘All my life, I felt like a misfit… until I met you. I felt like I didn’t fit in anywhere, that everyone around me was smarter, prettier, braver. I’d been let down so many times, I’d begun to feel sorry for myself. I’d never really had a reason to trust anyone, I felt like I’d been screwed over my whole life.’

‘But you… you opened your heart and you confided that you felt that way too… that at some point in our lives, we all do. I realized that if someone like you could learn to trust again, then maybe I could too.’

She stopped and glanced around her. Both Neal and Sara had made their way to stand on either side of her, arms around their foster daughter. 

‘But most of all, you gave me a gift that I’ll treasure for the rest of my life. You taught me to believe in myself. You told me that I had people around me who loved me, who cared about me and that I needed to open my eyes and my heart before it was too late. But then you said that people are frail and sometimes even those who love us the most can let us down and that, in our darkest hour, we need to be able to believe in ourselves. To have enough faith and courage to look deep inside ourselves and have confidence that we’ll do the right thing. And then, we need to work hard to overcome the obstacles along the way.’

Caitlin was surprisingly calm, no tears just an earnest look on her face as she spoke. ‘Your last words to me were ‘Believe in yourself.’ And then you said: ‘You can do anything. I'll help you.’

Neal and Sara exchanged looks, tears running down their faces.

‘And I promised you I would’ she said. ‘I want you to know that I’m going to spend the rest of my life fulfilling my promise to you.’

She reached into the urn, feeling with the tips of fingers that it was almost empty. She was careful to leave a handful for Neal and scattered some ashes around the bottom of the tree before stepping back and returning to where she’d been standing, leaving Neal and Sara alone. 

Everybody stepped forward, creating a circle around the sapling. Sara remained next to Neal, her hand on his back as he prepared to say his last goodbye.

‘Mom…’ he began. ‘We’re all here with you. As of today, every single time I come in or out of the house, I’ll have a fleeting thought for you. In the spring, when the flowers bloom, I’ll remember the smile on your face that day long ago when you sat on those steps, fighting with all your might to stand up to your demons. Even through the pain on your face that day, I saw a glimmer of hope as you searched for peace and inspiration in the simple beauty of a flowering shrub. I hope this last resting place will provide you with that peace you searched for, for so long. You’ll always be near us and we’ll always be near you. Mom…’

He coughed and Sara rubbed his back gently, giving him the strength to finish.

‘Mom, our journey has not been an easy one. But I am so grateful that you and I were able to leave the pain from the past behind. You taught me about unconditional love, about forgiveness, about courage. When I faltered a few years back, you gave me strength. You showed me that no matter how hopeless I might be feeling, there is always a way out. You reminded me I needed to dig deep and fight to keep what was most important to me: the people I love.’

‘When we reunited, your body was weak and frail but your spirit was stronger than it had ever been.’

Like Caitlin had done, Neal brought his hand to rest on the sturdy trunk of the tree he’d planted earlier in the day. He let the last of the ashes float down to surround the new tree. 

‘In a way, you remind me of this tree. Like its trunk, your spirit is strong and robust and your heart is fragile and beautiful like the flowers that will bloom someday. I love you.’

He stepped back and everyone joined hands, an unbroken circle of love and respect for a woman who, despite the difficult life she’d had, had come back into their lives and shared her love and wisdom with all of them.

‘Goodbye Mom’ Neal said. ‘Rest in peace.’

La fin


End file.
